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pregnancy 1 month after an early miscarriage (aged 19)

(13 Posts)
sassybell Wed 10-Apr-13 09:16:18

I know i am very young, but all this wasn't planned. me and my boyfriend have been together for 3 years, during this time i have been using the contraceptive pill which obviously didn't work and on the 11th march i found out i was pregnant, sadly i started spotting that day and on the 15th march i found out i miscarried. i called the doctors a few days later to arrange for an appointment with the nurse to get me back on the pill as i threw all mine out in excitement about my first pregnancy. they couldn't book me in untill the 8th of april where i was asked to do a pregnancy test on account for the unprotected sex i have been having since the mc. the nurse left the tst to work for a whole 1 minute before telling me it was negative. but i thought she didnt leave it for long enough so brought two cheap test strips on the way home and both came out positive, to be certain i brought six more tests yesterday (9th) and out of the four i did all four have been positive. i am in two minds wether or not to go back to my doctors as i dont think they would beleive me due to her test showing negative ( i dont know if they are less sensitive than the over teh counter ones or if she just didnt give it enough time to work) i was told to return in three weeks to do another test just t be sure so should i wait untill then and just take it easy and rest?

Also, during my first pregnnacy my boyfriend was not quite as happy about it as i was and didnt really want to keep the baby. although after the misccariage we agreed if i was ever to fall pregnant again a termination would not be an option. but i dont want to tell him just yet because i know if i do he will stress me out some how unintentially of course but im already worried about this pregnancy as it is, i dont want any stress just yet. would it be wrong to wait for my appointment in 3 weeks and have the nurse tell us both im pregnant or should i man up and tell him myself?

rosiedays Wed 10-Apr-13 09:43:28

Hi sassy didn't want to read and run as understand your feeling very emotional right now. 19 is young but not so young and you sound like it's what you want so congratulations.
It's very early days, if you don't feel ready to tell your BF then it's your choice, can you tell your mum? it would be good to have someone who knows so they can support you.
get some folic acid (pregnancy vitamins) if you can, eat well and drink lots of fluid. Be kind to yourself and try not to worry.
Good luck and hope everything works out for you. xx

sassybell Wed 10-Apr-13 09:56:59

I think i might tell my cousin as she was going to be the first person i was going tell the first time. I usualy drink nothing but coca cola but i know caffein isn't good for the baby so have swapped the fizzy drinks for water.

Is hard sex a no no? or can i continue with all my bedroom activities?

Also up untill yesterday i had been smoking weed a bit as due for the past month i have felt really down in the dumps which had affected my appetite and i went for 4 days without any food, i knew from when i was a bit younger that smoking a little bit of weed did the world of good for my appetite and would allow me to completely finish a meal. i havent smoked anything since i found out i was pregnant again but i know thc takes a while to be completely removed from your system do you think this could affect my baby or will he/she be okay if i continue to not smoke?

rosiedays Wed 10-Apr-13 10:17:22

glad you've got someone to confide in.
sex is ok, Hard sex??? blush
you can't change what you have done before you found out so don't beat yourself up. I smoked weed before i found out too but stopped just after the shock of BFP wore off!! there are very different views on smoking weed during Pregnancy, it's up to you to make your choice. (i think its best not too but did with my first who is now 25!) there is clear evedence that smoking during pregnancy can harm you baby.

sassybell Wed 10-Apr-13 11:43:03

hard sex as in rough sex

also i have no intentions to carry on smoking, i was just worried that the damage could already be done but now i know there is a great chance baby wll be healthy and fine then i will be taking no risks what so ever to change that. I dont need cigarettes when i have a pregnancy to look forward to :D

Ilovestackingcups Wed 10-Apr-13 14:26:35

Hi Sassy, congratulations!
Don't feel that you are wrong, or that you have to wait to see that nurse again. If you have had so many positive pregnancy tests, odds are you are pregnant, and as you have had a miscarriage in a previous pregnancy, your doctors will want to keep an eye on you in the early weeks to make sure everything goes well. Your negative result at the nurses' office may have been simply because your body wasn't producing enough of the pregnancy hormones at that time to show up on the test. By the time you took your own test, your body was full of them, which is a very good sign for your progressing pregnancy.
Sex, however rough, is not going to hurt your baby in and of itself, but I would be careful not to use any sex toys without speaking to your midwife about it first. You may find as you get more pregnant that you feel more sensitive, and you won't want to do too much strenuous stuff anyway.
Do also talk to your cousin if you can't talk to your boyfriend. You need people to know, because you will need people to support and encourage you now.
Good luck!

AngelMummy2012 Wed 10-Apr-13 17:30:15

Sassy I'm turning 19 in June and I've lost 3 pregnancies. Different stages 23, 7 & 6 weeks all last year. The one at 23 weeks was my baby boy and I was 17.

If you don't want to tell your partner yet wait until your doctor confirms smile

If you want to have hard sex, I don't see why you can't.. we have sex as usual when I fall pregnant!

A big congratulations on your pregnancy, hope this pregnancy goes well grin
You can Personal message me if you like. X

AngelMummy2012 Wed 10-Apr-13 17:31:58

smile and grin should be smile, grin.... Oops!

sassybell Thu 11-Apr-13 08:17:18

hey AngelMummy, i did my first tests around 15 minutes after the doctor did hers, hence why i think she did it wrong. i have told my cousin and a close friend and they are being really supportive smile I only wandered about the rough sex because i read somewhere that women can sometimes start to bleed? and i just don't want to see any blood at all for 8 and a half months.

thankyou i will bear that in mind smile x

AngelMummy2012 Thu 11-Apr-13 10:46:51

Bloods the worst thing to see.. I've heard some woman bleed after sex whilst pregnant. Apparently its normal. X

sassybell Thu 11-Apr-13 13:58:25

when calculating your due date, should i take the first day i started bleeding because of my mc as the first day of my last menstrual cycle? x

EuroShaggleton Thu 11-Apr-13 14:05:54

Hi sassy, I just wanted to add one thing to all the good advice you have got on here. Be aware that you can test positive for a while after a miscarriage as the hormones are still floating around in your bloodstream. I was still getting a clear positive two weeks after I started mcing. I was planning to test again to see when it went clear but forgot about it, so I can't say for sure how long I would have been testing positive for.

sassybell Fri 12-Apr-13 13:33:00

hey eauroshaggleton, my hormones went back down to zero fairly quickly i think as i was getting negative tests while bleeding a around a week after i found out i was pregnant the first time, which is how i no i mc x

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