so depressed

[Zuzo]

Hey there. I am 15 weeks pregnant and for some reason it seems that the further the weeks go, the more depressed I feel. I don't know whether its the hormones, but I feel so alone. I recently got engaged and I love my fiance, but it just seems like he doesn't understand me at all. I don't even want to talk to him anymore because whenever I tell him how I feel, he'll make it about him and say I'm attacking him. We're always fighting. It breaks my heart so badly because I feel I have all these big things happening in my life, but I'm not happy

[Franimal]

Hi Zuzo, I'm sorry to hear that... Was the pregnancy planned? I think it's quite normal for hormones to make your emotions go up and down but I think if it's starting to affect your relationships it might be time to get some help? Have you got any close friends/family you can talk too? Have you been to the doctors? Men unfortunately don't get to share the turbulent hormonal rollercoaster ride that is being pregnant but it doesn't help you either (men are from mars, women are from venus!). It always helps to talk it through...

[june2013]

Hi Zuzo, I was really emotional around 15weeks. It lasted 24hours and recurred bang on every 7 days. I'm not normally down for no real reason (work / stress, etc) and never really suffered from pmt. so I really struggled. My husband is great but didn't really get it and I wasn't showing at the time either so I think that made it harder bc it didn't feel real...

For me, it passed after about week 20. I still have ups and downs but nothing like what I had around 15 weeks. I learnt to accept it and talk it through with who ever listened. My friends who weren't interested in kids were suddenly great and v supportive.

It also made me very worried about post partum depression...

I guess my question is whether you have ever been depressed? As Franimal says your gp or midwife might be able to help you and I think they are used to ppl having a hard time so should be understanding...

You have all my sympathies and thoughts!

Take care xx

[Zuzo]

The pregnancy wasn't planned. I was on the pill when I conceived. I've been to the doctor and he's says everything is fine. The reason I posted here is cause I don't really have anyone to talk to. None of my friends have kids and none are married. I've actually started feeling like the one friend I could talk to doesn't care anymore. I'm always helping him deal with his issues, he's gay. But if I don't ask, he doesn't bother. So I've kind of given up on trying tot get him to be there for me. I have sisters and my mom is supportive but I'm afraid if I tell them I'm feeling this depressed they'll tell me its my own fault. I've never been depressed. I'm always the happy one. So I don't really know how to deal with it.

[Tallyra]

Are there any groups that you can start going to locally? Find a childrens centre that might have mums meetups? It might help to be able to talk to people that are going through a similar thing/have gone through it recently.

[Zuzo]

Tallyra unfortunately there isn't such groups where I stay. I recently moved back home and its far from the city. Really wish I wasn't feeling so terrible

[Tallyra]

I'm so sorry. I haven't been quite where you are now, but when I was depressed, I felt that getting out and seeing people really helped - even if you don't talk about the problem, it helps you stay on top of things. Have you tried looking on the mumsnet local site? I don't know how active they are, but maybe you can see if any MNer is nearby? Try not to worry about this - it does sound like a hormonal thing (I know, that probably doesn't help right now, sorry).
My only other advice is to tell your family. Let them know. You can even head them off by saying you know it's probably because of the hormones, but you just need a few extra hugs right now?

[Zuzo]

I'll try talking to my family. But what I really need is my partner. Hope somehow he can just learn to understand me a lil more. Thank u so much for listening. It feels good to let it out somehow