Tell me this happens to everyone (tmi)

[EverythingIsTicketyBoo]

How glad am I that I have only got a few weeks left! I got home from the mw this morning after asking for a referral for physio for my hips, I was on the toilet giving birth to something you would NOT put pictures of on Facebook, having a nose bleed while trying to open the packaging for my brand new Canestan cream and pessaries, after all that was done I found the sudocrem for Percy the pile and realised that even the extra long sanitary towels I had got would only cover one area at a time :(

Tell me about your day (or at least tell me if that has made you feel a bit better)

[MarinaIvy]

How long does the sanitary towel need to be to reach the nosebleed as well?

[EverythingIsTicketyBoo]

[SayCoolNowSayWhip]

Ah, the joys and dignity of pregnancy.....

I was at my PILs at the weekend and sneezed so hard a bit of wee came out. My MIL asked if my waters had broken.... (37 wks)

[Nagoo]

Marina

[EverythingIsTicketyBoo]

Saycool how did you manage to explain that? And what is this dignity of which you speak?? I don't believe I have any of that!

Similarly when I was in labour with DS2 I thought my waters had broken and proudly presented myself to the mw for checking to be told that I had in fact peed myself

[MerryMingeWhingesAgain]

That's sorted out the flutters of broodiness for me nicely, OP.

Bringing back memories of weeing every hour through the night and hidden tubes of Anusol HC in the bathroom cupboard and stabbing pain in the pubic bone everytime I swung my legs apart to clamber into the car.

[cupcake78]

It's nothing but glamorous isn't it! I also have spd, thrush and piles and I just feel oh so attractive .

I went shoe shopping with do yesterday and to my horror I had to get him to help me find the right size and get the blinking things on. I felt 90. I then tried to have a bath to ease the stiffness of spd only to find getting in and out almost impossible while being stared at by dh and ds grinning at me.

I'm trying to forget the farce that was sleeping with my pregnancy pillow

[Chopsypie]

Having to get your OH to do your piles and thrush creams because you can't bend due to horrific reflux/heartburn.
Now thats undignified.

[cupcake78]

Chop.

[EverythingIsTicketyBoo]

Glad to be of help Merryminge

Cupcake that is tough! Shopping can be the undoing of any pregnant women :(

Just loving the glamour of it all!!

[EverythingIsTicketyBoo]

Oh Chop sorry but that did make me laugh just a little

[Knittingnovice]

Am 32 weeks with DC3 and have had a horrendous cold which means coughing can lead to wetting myself, but also vommitting occasionally.

So I have been sat on the loo coughing, weeing and vomiting, while DD (3) watches & runs away from me when I cough incase I vomit on her.

I also have a grape sized pile and the newest indignity ( due to the cold / cough situation) a slight anterior prolapse!!

And heartburn.

On the plus side, DD was a week early, & DS bang on time, so the midwife said that things might kick off early.

[SaggyOldClothCatpuss]

Sorry, Ive had 2 babies, it really is horrid, but I am not currently PG and have just weed a little at the extra long sanitary towel!
Thats fucking hysterical!
for everyone though! x

[ShowOfHands]

When I was newly pregnant with dd and bleeding, I was on a gynae ward out of hours waiting for an emergency scan (suspected ectopic, thankfully not) and a woman was rushed in by her dh, ushered past in a v frantic way, the dh was on the phone saying "yip waters gone, hospital now, ring you when the baby's here grandma!!!". An hour later they shuffled out, bloke on the phone again. "No, no, it was just a ruddy great piss after all. Stand down".

Cheered me up no end.

[SayCoolNowSayWhip]

Show

I have no dignity left with my PILs now.... Luckily my lovely DH Sussex what was happening and helped to smooth over situation. Not assisted by my DD saying helpfully 'Mummy wee wee!'

Chops - not quite as bad but I had to get DH to help me 'tidy up down there' the other day. After he lovingly pointed out that the midwife might not be able to see the head through the undergrowth.....

[SayCoolNowSayWhip]

Sussex? sussed

[EverythingIsTicketyBoo]

My DH has already enthusiastically offered to help with a trim and tidy ready for the big event I have managed so far with a well placed mirror!!

Show

[CareerGirl01]

I think I lost mr dignity when I wet myself on our lounge floor a week after having DD1 - I had her by EMCS and epidural went wrong as well. Lets just say DH still remembers it four years later. This time round I wet myself when I cough (31 weeks now) but at least no one need know.

[EverythingIsTicketyBoo]

Oh dear Career it's less fun when you get reminded just how much dignity you have lost :(

[racheld33]

This thread has really made me smile today.
Only 10 weeks, so my main loss of dignity is vomiting in the bathroom bin, the office bin, the kitchen bin, and the bedroom bin today! DH on his way home to clean up

[CareerGirl01]

Everything let's just say I am now wearing the massive Tena hammock sized pads - just in case.

[Cavort]

I am 24 weeks with DC1 and this hilarious thread has put the fear into me!

[50shadesofmeh]

My pile is the size of a massive grape I kid you not and the worse thing is I can hardly reach my bum to wipe it right :-(

[EverythingIsTicketyBoo]

Ooh 50 ouch!!

Cavort think of this as a lesson in all things they don't tell you

[Purplemonster]

Nah, it will never happen to me (23 weeks with head buried firmly in sand) you've all given me a much needed laugh though!