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Last Post - Heavy Drinking Before I Knew I Was Pregnant (have to decide today)

(164 Posts)
tsmith02162013 Thu 28-Feb-13 15:01:59

I appreciate the women who responded to my first thread about drinking (heavily) before I knew I was pregnant.

I have to make a decision today as to what I am going to do- keeping going or not. I am hoping to hear from any woman who drank as heavily as I did before she knew she was pregnant and then went on to have the baby.

When I was 28 days (4 weeks) since my last period, I drank two bottles of wine (standard 750 ML size) in one night. The next night, I had 3 drinks (1 beer, 2 glasses of wine), and the night after, I had 4-5 beers.

I was also drinking earlier that month, usually a glass of wine here or there. What really worries me is the binge drinking, the heavy drinking, the night of 2 bottles of wine.

If I can find mums who had a drinking problem like I did, who drank that heavily before they knew, I think it would be enough to settle my mind. My GP and midwife, who I saw since the last thread, were not very reassuring, although we did see a heartbeat.

cafecito Mon 11-Mar-13 07:20:57

But nobody can quantify the risk accurately. no doctor will tell you it will be fine- aa whole host of things could go wrong. It doesn't just depend on what you drink, but at what point in development this is, possiby other genetic factors too. Nobody can tap in 2 x wine to a calculator and give you a .005% risk, or whatever. It will take another decade to see more sigificant study results. But equally 30% and 75% is really just laughably wrong. The current thinking is the spectrum disorder occurs in around 1-3% of pregnancies.

cafecito Mon 11-Mar-13 07:26:30

there is still such a thing as a wrongul birth lawsuit - no doctor with any sense will risk their career to reassure you it will be fine.

ExpatAl Mon 11-Mar-13 08:43:59

I don't think a doctor would give you those percentages OP. Perhaps you misunderstood. Wishing you all the best.

tsmith02162013 Mon 11-Mar-13 16:17:25

Having a number to put on a risk really isn't that helpful either way. Frankly, I was surprised that the doctor was willing to put a number on the risk of drinking alcohol before you know you are pregnant, as my other doctors were completely unwilling to do so.

Creamtea1 Mon 11-Mar-13 16:37:06

I agree with others that OP needs to step away from Internet research and forums. Also a lot of people have spent time giving advice etc yet the thread is going in circles.

glossyflower Mon 11-Mar-13 17:06:35

I think that we should wind this down now. It's not helpful to OP and just feeding the negativity. The answers OP seek are here, you wanted true stories of women drinking alcohol whilst pregnant and overwhelmingly the end results were positive. As for professional medical opinion only OP can seek that herself.
Can this thread be closed to further comments?

tsmith02162013 Mon 11-Mar-13 22:38:35

I believe I have probably said all that I can on this subject, really. Thanks to everyone who responded with helpful information.

tsmith02162013 Mon 11-Mar-13 22:39:17

One question- if the thread is closed to future comments, will it still be available online? I have found that it helps me calm down when I get stressed about the drinking to come back and read some of the comments on the thread.

LemonPeculiarJones Tue 12-Mar-13 09:07:39

You don't have to get it closed down, tsmith. I think it's reaching its natural conclusion anyway. It's ok just to leave it.

Good luck with mastering your anxieties. And I really think that your baby will be absolutely FINE!

Take care.

cafecito Tue 12-Mar-13 18:30:41

good luck with your pregnancy tsmith - keep up with as much support as you can have in RL, try and have some counselling- maybe CBT if you find it helpful- and try to stop feeding your anxiety smile we can all find horror stories if we look for them. I honestly believe your baby will be healthy and you will be happy. very best wishes to you x

marywonderful Thu 14-Mar-13 01:04:38

So sorry you are so worried. When you have anxiety it can be easy to get hyper focused on a specific worry. It's a valid worry, but you have made it bigger than it should be. Trust the people in your life to help you put this in perspective.

I'm concerned about how an abortion would effect your anxiety. I could see you hyper focusing on the day, the clinic, the operating table, the doctor, the sounds of the machine. Imagine living that over and over again. I know friends who have aborted and this could really mess with your head - especially if you are sensitive to stress.

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