Blooming? Blooming 'eck!

[KathrynWales]

Being pregnant throws up so many questions...

*why am I lounging around the house in hideous velour tracksuits, eating too many creme eggs and looking like Waynetta Slob?
*Why does my hair refuse to do anything but look like a medieval bowl cut?
*Why is my bum growing quicker than my bump?
*Why am I suddenly fascinated by battery powered gadgets that squeeze your boobs?
*Why do people look shocked when I say I am not due until June?
*Why does my mother insist I can't carry anything heavier than a teabag?
*Why do I wake myself up snoring every morning like a pig searching for truffles?
*Why is my cat suddenly acting like a psycho and pooing in the bath?

Was hoping for chic maternity type glow...instead have got broken veins and wind.

Its a blooming mystery

[beansprout]

You paint a glamorous picture. Actually, that is pretty glamorous compared to life with a newborn!!

Like your psycho cat though

[beansprout]

I really fancy a creme egg now!!

[sniff]

you have made me laff my hair looks like a girls world head after 3 yr olds have played with it!!! and I am wearing a nightshirt!!! only ever do this when I am pregnant

[Enid]

i have wild mood swings about being pg

hated it three days ago and now quite enjoying it again - like feeling that I can 'opt out' of stuff I don't want to do (eg go to a viking party tonight )

Also I went out to a works thing last night and everyone said how glamorous I looked
AND dh being incredibly kind and solicitious to me

slightly dreading after the baby tbh

[HellKat]

Pmsl!!!
Oh how true!!
But we love it all the same!

[hockeymum]

How true, I was lying in bed yesterday remembering the days when I used to wear make up and do my hair, seems so long ago now (probably July before I got pregnant!), so decided even though the most glamorous person I was seeing yesterday was my doctor, to do my hair and make up and I felt almost human!

Oh, the cat thing. My cat did this, it's an attention thing - he or she will know you are pregnant (clever things cats!) and be wanting your attention (even negative). Just watch supernanny or something and treat the cat like an errant toddler and it'll be fine. My cat started weeing in the bath when I was pregnant last time and moved out for a couple of days when I bought dd home, it'll think it's a sibling to your baby and get quite jealous but will recover eventually!!

[colditz]

Urgh. Am 35 weeks.

Trains.... I stood for my entire journey on a train yesterday - one of only 3 people doing so. When I got off the train I loundly wished twins upon all the women on that train, then I lay on a bench at the station for 10 minutes because my back hurt so much.

Then, of course, the second I lie down in bed, the booting and bum rolling starts... he seems to be trying to fight his way out. I hated that with ds too. I never minded him being awake at night once he was born, just in utero.

Mad hair, yes I also look like I have been electricuted. And yes, people do keep saying "Wow, April? You have , erm, quite a wait yet, don't you!" Addressed entirely to my massively overdue looking bump.

And my floor is messy, because I keep dropping things, and I can't be bothered to get down there and pick them up. And I am shattered and fat and flushed and sweaty and my fingers look like half a pound of Butcher's Best Sausages.

I hate being pregnant.

[deblaca]

this has really made me lol followed very closely by thinking sh*t i've got so much more to come (only 22 weeks today) .......... but yeah what is it with the hair - its so full of electricity i feel like i've been plugged in over night - and the slobbing about - and the looks (even my mum keeps saying "you're big for your time") ..... in our house the word chic has left the building

blooming mystery it sure is

[KathrynWales]

Lol at Colditz! "fat and flushed and sweaty " !
You sound like my twin !

Think our babies are siphoning off our shampoos/conditioners/wrinkle creams in some weird womb robbery type thing. My baby will be born with luscious hair and glowing skin and I will resemble an overcooked baked potato...
Spud u like. That'll be me...

As for being glam, well...i think i was once, at an xmas party in about 1993. Nowadays, I am in jim jams most of the day, coupled with furry (and therefore v. unsexy) dressing gown, bed socks and slippers that look like ugg boots. It is not a pretty sight. Because I have been off work, have been ordering lots of books off amazon, and so have to endure regular daytime visits from post man. He always looks slightly scared when he knocks on the door. "Oh god. another parcel for the wild haired banshee at number 18..."

Am glad I am not alone in my freakish ways... and thanks for the cat tips Hockeymum
Am getting to the point now where I feel like sticking the bloody moggy in pampers newborns...
All I'll need now is for the roles to become totally reversed and for new baby to use the litter tray....

[pepperrabbit]

My cat has gone loopy too!
DH asked why I looked glum the other day and I pointed out that at 35 weeks my chin is resting on my chest, my chest on my bump and my bump on my lap. God knows whats holding my bottom up but as I can't see it I don't care!
Chic? hmmmm...

[KathrynWales]

PepperRabbit

[blobsmummy]

I'm so pleased there are others out there who feel as crap as me! This is my first pregnancy and I'm 27 weeks. Had this insane idea before i got pregnant that I would look glowing, my skin would be wonderful and I would take to pregnancy like a duck to water - now I just can't wait for this horrendous experience to be over!

I've suffered with every complaint in the book so far, and am barely awake typing this at work because I'm only getting 3 hours of sleep a night. Am desperate to finish coz i can't stand making myself look presentable each day.

Will pregnancy ever end?! It feels like I've been going through this for the last 8 years, and I've got another 15 to go!

By the way, my cat is scratching all the furniture she can find - apart from her scratching post of course!

[fenny1]

Hurrah! I am not the only misery out here!
Just taken a day off work (well, working from home but achieving diddly) to take collection of cot mattress and they have sent wrong size! That I answered the door in 3/4 length orange trousers, pink fluffy socks and a fleecy blanket round my sholders only begins to describe my 'look'. Want my baby out and to sleep on my stomach again

[KathrynWales]

I find the whole pregnancy business a bit hilarious... years of control over figure gone in an instant.. the bladder control of a 93 year old and boobs that could chin Tyson.

Bed is now a wrestling match with sheets/duvet/57 pillows and a cat that decides to sit on my tummy at 4am.

Sitting down is uncomfortable, I get dizzy standing up, out of breath when walking, am not allowed to sleep on front/back/right side whilst sleeping on left side gives me hip pain...
Eating gives me heart burn, not eating makes me sick.

But despite all that, I love it when I feel my baby kicking and suspect i will forgive him everything when he is born

One thing I do know..if men were the ones who had babies, this planet would have a population of about 20 people.

[hockeymum]

Kathrynwales - you really are my twin! Do you live in Wales too?

I really did think that this pregnancy I would bloom a little bit, but I havent even had one day when someone has not said "You look awful!". Never mind less than 6 weeks to go!! Are you also with me on the angryness yet? If not that will come. I've been alternating anger and misery for some weeks now. Made a big mistake watching the Dunblane thing last week - sobbed and sobbed. Then got angry with everyone else - heigh ho, they might forgive me when I finally have the baby!

[littlemisspiggy]

You lot have really cheered me up!!!

[KathrynWales]

Angry??? me???!! I have fired off 3 letters to my daughter's school recently, and had several slanging matches with gangs of local hoodie wearing youths !!!!!!!! Is entirely hormonal as am normally a mouse, but am veering between sobbing at TV adverts and ranting at the world....

So yes, hockeymum, we must be twins!

Am in North Wales... Bangor ( metropolis of the north) you will normally find me ranting at the neighbours whilst eating chocolate, wearing baggy jog pants and sobbing furiously.... wave if you see me!

[nickyp08]

Everyone tells me i am glowing but i feel totally the opposite..... my hair though has grown about 3 inches since being preggers and is thick and glossy, my nails look false but they are all my own and i am proudly for the first time looking after them and my acne... yes acne at 31 has got heaps better... all of the above i expect to disappear when ickle monkey is born... false sense of well being i call it.... aside from the chronic back pain... restless legs...heartburn..itchy skin ....fatigue ....bah blah blah.....oh yeah and the snoring which wakes even me up (never snored before according to my partner)and looking like i have stepped out of a jumble sale... i am relishing the joys of being pregnant for the third time... NOT!!!!!!Hmmm maybe a little bit. Hideous velour tracksuits are so comfy though! I am fed up with people saying how huge i am (like it is their own personal business) and those people who have now changed their minds and say my bump is compact and up front and i only seem to have put bump weight on... One thing i do, do though is when picking up child 1 and 2 from school i always do my hair and make up, it makes you feel more human and glamourous..... even if underneath it all you wanna disappear until the whole pregnancy is over...