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Pregnancy

Is the woman on one born every minute 'normal'?

51 replies

OompaLumpa · 11/01/2011 21:12

I don't mean that in a rude way but am of with our first and being honest, she has left me terrified! I'm talking about the lady who was screaming a lot....

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Choufleur · 11/01/2011 21:13

She was very loud. I don't remember screaming that much. but think i grunted a lot.

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1Catherine1 · 11/01/2011 21:14

I haven't seen it but so many people have been talking about it - on our ante-natal thread and all my "friends" on facebook. Apparently it was not normal and we should not be scared by her... I'm actually quite interested in seeing it now because of everyone talking about it Hmm

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BingoSpotDotter · 11/01/2011 21:15

no.

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moregranny · 11/01/2011 21:15

In my experience, bearing in mind that I am 56 now and my daughter is expecting her first in June, no ! :)

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drivingmisscrazy · 11/01/2011 21:16

don't know, but DP had a 4 hour unmedicated labour (first baby, aged 39) and barely made a sound until pushing stage. She did say that it bloody hurt though, and was extremely pissed off that I got tea and custard creams! I think some people are just noisy labourers - and she clearly went into panic mode which really doesn't help

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TheSkiingGardener · 11/01/2011 21:16

Normal, yes. Usual, absolutely not! Everyone is different and for some people that means making a lot of noise when they are in some degree of pain. Another woman in the same level of pain may have coped with a grimace.

I have a very low pain threshold and the woman that broke my waters recommended an epidural based on how much discomfort I was already in! I would have been very noisy!

Just go with it, research what your options are and do what is best for you at the time.

She was extreme though!

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sam26oscar · 11/01/2011 21:16

no from what i have read on a lot of threads is that she was over the top with the screaming especially as she was still screaming AFTER the epidural, i had one and can honestly say didn't feel much after that!! However i do appreciate that some women make a lot of noise but i would say she was at the top end of noisy Grin

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maltesers · 11/01/2011 21:18

She was very noisy . . i watched it too. She did suffer pain, but then giving birth does hurt, , ,but, yes, she was so so OTT.
I have had 3 births and was noisy with the 2nd baby but not loud or noisy with the other two.

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Madinitials · 11/01/2011 21:18

Don't let her scare you, everyone handles labour differently and maybe she is generally 'expressive'!! I had a difficult birth with DD and I wasn't that loud. DC2 due in two weeks...

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OompaLumpa · 11/01/2011 21:19

I really don't want to be in that much pain or react that way. Must be really difficult for partners too watching. I know it sounds silly but I can't bear the thought of the mw's laughing at me either. god, will they have to gag me? Confused

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OwlMother · 11/01/2011 21:19

No, I have had three and found myself asking my husband whether I was that bad. Thankfully nothing like it - just because you are in labour your personality remains the same, if you're unlikely to yell and swear normally I don't think you're likely to start in labour. Apparently I am comical and apologetic when in labour?!

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SlightlyTubbyHali · 11/01/2011 21:20

That was pretty extreme - which is why the mws and the anaesthetist seemed rather bemused.

Don't be afraid. She was a screamer, but that simply means she was a screamer, not that she was in agonising pain. And I suspect that all that thrashing about and getting upset may have made the labour feel worse. Relaxing and going with it really is the ticket.

What I don't get about that programme is why the women get into their nighties and get in bed to labour. I've never met anyone who thought that lying in bed to labour felt comfy.

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maltesers · 11/01/2011 21:21

Just have lots of gas and air which works well if you use it well, or an epidural , which IMHO is fabulous. . .like an injection for a dental filling. . .total numbness and totally pain free !!

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OompaLumpa · 11/01/2011 21:22

P.s. Good luck with the forthcoming birth madinitials

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VivaLeBeaver · 11/01/2011 21:24

In 6 years as a midwife I've only seen a handful of women be that extreme. Please don't let her scare you. Try and stay as calm and relaxed as you can, I know its not easy when you're in pain but the more tense and scared you are the more it hurts and then it becomes a vicious circle. Focus on your breathing and try and get your partner to talk you through your contractions and breathing if that helps.

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MoldyWarp · 11/01/2011 21:24

I think she thrashed and screamed an awful lot.... more much more than i have ever done (6 labours) HOWEVER I would say that despite her reaction to the pain being different to mine - i felt as though I had experienced her level of pain.

It really does hurt.

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OompaLumpa · 11/01/2011 21:55

I am scared ...

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VivaLeBeaver · 11/01/2011 22:01

How many weeks are you? Have you thought about hypnobirthing, even if you can't do a course just reading a book/gettign a CD could help.

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thenightsky · 11/01/2011 22:04

I didn't see screamy lady, but I barely made a sound, apart from moaning about being hungry and having backache Grin

I might have groaned a bit at the pushing out stage, but that was more due to the effort involved... like that tennis player that used to grunt when he served.

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fatsatsuma · 11/01/2011 22:25

I look back on the births of my 3 as the three best experiences of my life, and I would like to encourage you NOT to be terrified Smile

No one can experience another person's pain, or perception of pain, so it's impossible to say what this woman was going through.

However what others have said about making a conscious effort to stay calm and control your breathing is really really important.

If you panic and start to breath rapidly or hold your breath, your sense of panic escalates because you are deprived of oxygen.

The woman in question said beforehand that she had a low pain threshold and was expecting the worst. I'm sticking my head above the parapet here, but I don't think she made much effort to cope with the pain and reacted very badly from the beginning - screaming in a way that many/most women might only do when experiencing the most intense contractions during transition.

Because her breathing was all over the place, she became increasingly out of control - eg trying to climb off the trolley whilst in transit. I think she just gave in to what she was expecting to be a terrible experience, when it could have been so much more positive.

I'm NOT saying that it doesn't hurt, or that everyone who has traumatic labours could have avoided it simply by staying calm - of course not - but simple things like focusing on slowing down your breathing can help so much.

The other thing that would have really helped her would have been to get off her back and move around. I could not understand why the midwife didn't get her off the bed. I cannot imagine going through a labour lying down, or without the option of someone (DH, midwife) rubbing my back during contractions.

Sorry, rant over Blush

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Scruffyhound · 11/01/2011 22:35

I think she was loud Im loud and sometimes used to swear not laods but enough before DS came along. I think anyones labour is painful and it does depend on the person. I was apologising and grunted I was also funny?! I must admit the epidural was fab and did you see her change after she had that? She seemed loads better. I had everything going it was great pethadine, gas and air and epidural I could hear a woman down the corridor screaming and swearing I asked why is she being like that? I hope Im not like that Im sorry if I am. I was not I dont want to be a hero I want to try and enjoy giving birth and if there is something for the pain that is ok and safe Im for it!! Grin

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cowboylover · 11/01/2011 22:38

Like the pervious poster said thats what she thought she would be like so no suprise to her.

As a first timer due in May it did scare me a little but I felt really sorry for the 18 year old who was sky and being induced.

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cowboylover · 11/01/2011 22:40

sorry should have read shy!

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daisystone · 11/01/2011 22:41

She was hysterical and needed a good talking to.

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LadyOfTheFlowers · 11/01/2011 22:44

Everything Satsuma said - That is exactly what I thought about it and typed up, almost word for word, but was too chicken to click 'Post message' on another thread about it as I didn't want to get flamed.

I think she went in with the mindset she wouldn't cope well. You need to keep an open mind - you don't know how you will feel. Also, IME, each birth is different.

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