Day two - zero progress

(60 Posts)
englishbreakfast Tue 16-Jul-13 19:24:51

We started potty training DD (2.4 yo) yesterday. She has shown signs of readiness for a few months. First day was in re-usable training pants, zero effect! We'd put her on the potty every half an hour or so, she's sit for a minute or two, then would get up and pee in the pants at some point later (won't tell us when she's done it, although can feel that pants are wet). All day today went bottomless, same story, we would sit her on the potty every 30 mins, but she would only pee on the carpet (quite cute really, like a little kitten! smile). Managed to catch wee once in 2 days. Have no idea how to encourage her to go in the potty? Any advice from more experienced mums? x

cedar12 Tue 16-Jul-13 19:29:35

I would try for couple more days. My son clicked on about day 4. We are about 5weeks in now and he still has the odd accident maybe 3 a week. if she doesn't show any progress after a few days a should leave it a bit.

Hardhaton Tue 16-Jul-13 19:33:30

My ds4 has been going on the potty all weekend, Monday come he wee'd in my car, then next to the potty when he got up and then in ds3's playground!
Given up until school breaks up

BeaWheesht Tue 16-Jul-13 19:34:28

Give it a day or two more, if she doesn't improve leave it a while.

When she pees on the carpet still take her to sit on the potty afterwards to see if there's anymor

englishbreakfast Tue 16-Jul-13 21:06:20

Thank you! I've been reading other threads and realise now it's not unusual. This evening she looked like she wanted to pee and went and grabbed her potty and sat on it for a few minutes but unfortunately didn't produce anything. It seems she's been holding pee today (only peed a few times and small amounts). We went to the toilet together before bed, me on the toilet, her on the potty, tried again before bed. Now in bed and pull-ups for the night and crying she wants poo so hopefully she's not getting constipated. We will carry on for a few more days and see what happens.

IwishIwasmoreorganised Tue 16-Jul-13 21:08:41

Doe she want to be potty trained?

Ds1 asked to stop wearing nappies at 2.1 and was a breeze to train, ds2 wouldn't hear of it until he was 3 and that was it - no accidents at all!

Is she's not keen, I would leave it for a couple of months.

englishbreakfast Tue 16-Jul-13 21:12:10

no, she doesn't seem particularly keen. It's more of a case, we are praising her for it, so she's agreeing to sit on the potty to please us. It's just that she's starting preschool in September (2 days, 3 hours p/d) and while they are happy for her to be still in nappies, I thought it'd make things easier if she was potty trained when she started...

Has she got a potty book, pretty pants etc? We are on day 4 with DD (2.10) and these seem to be quite useful. She also sees other children at nursery who are potty trained, which is quite handy. We aren't having much success with poos, but wees are getting there. DD prefers the toilet to the potty, but will use either. This is our second attempt, and I don't get the impression that it is unusual to stop and start again if you don't get much luck.

Smartiepants79 Tue 16-Jul-13 22:08:33

Can take a few days. My Dd had a couple of days of weeing everywhere except in the potty. Then suddenly she just started doing it. I would give her a good few days. It sounds like she is going in the right direction.

pooka Tue 16-Jul-13 22:11:40

My own take on it is that it's easy when they want to and are ready but pain in arse and unnecessary stress when they aren't.

Dd was completely trained in 3 days, barely any accidents, when she was 2 and 4 months.

I tried with ds1 when he was similar age, perhaps a bit older. If it could turn back the clock I would not do it again. He got terribly constipated very very quickly and 18 months later, when he was finally constipation free and about 3 and 9 months he trained quickly and easily. 18 months of discomfort, movicol, doctors appointments and impact on his eating and general happiness.

So with ds2 I waited and waited and waited. He is now 3 and 10 months. 2 weeks ago he went into pants, had a happy sticker chart with 10p a sticker at the end of the week. Had 2 pee accidents on day 2 but has not had a single accident since then and is now also dry at night. A breeze. Yes, he was old to be in nappies, but happy and old.

Incidentally, even in nappies, neither ds1 nor ds2 EVER had a poo at preschool (although ds1 had leakage while he was constipated, which he found distressing, sadly).

Smartiepants79 Tue 16-Jul-13 23:05:14

If I had waited for my DD to think she wanted to be toilet trained she'd have been going to school in nappies.
She was 2.9 as it was.
She was completely ready.
After the first week we had no more accidents and within a month we stopped using nappies at night and she has never had an accident.
Some children do just need a little push!

EauRouge Tue 16-Jul-13 23:12:29

I agree, some children do need a little push but if there's no progress after about 5 or 6 days then I would leave it for a while. We just had our first go with DD2 (2.5yo) and she didn't quite get it. There were a few in the potty but a lot on the carpet too. DD1 cracked it within days when she was potty trained (at about 3.9yo, 3rd attempt!) so she was obviously ready.

Encouragement is fine but don't force it if she's not ready.

englishbreakfast Wed 17-Jul-13 08:43:28

Good morning everyone. Well, day 3 and DD got up and sat for a couple of minutes on the potty in the bedroom and then again in the living room, but hasn't done anything. I think she must have gone into the nappy before getting up but she also looks a bit uncomfortable so possibly holding it in a bit. She also just did a bit of a poo on the carpet, I put her on the potty to finish, but she just sat on it saying 'pee-pee' and 'ka-ka' (for poo). At least she seems to (sort of) understand what it's for, it's just the doing bit not happening!

I think as we've started now, we'll definitely carry on for a few more days just so that we give it a good shot. I will keep you posted about our progress. Thanks very much for advice / sharing your experience so far. My mum makes it sound like it was nothing when I and DSIS were potty trained, but her memory must be hazy after so many years! smile.

englishbreakfast Wed 17-Jul-13 16:10:55

a quick update to say that we've had one poo and one wee in the potty today!!! smile She started to poo on carpet, so my DH put her on the potty straight away and she finished there. And later today she was looking like she wanted to wee, so we said go on the potty, and she went and sat down on it herself and did a wee, I couldn't believe it. Am really hoping that she is starting to get it...x

Excellent - well done mini-breakfast.

Smartiepants79 Wed 17-Jul-13 17:55:23

Sounds like good steps in the right direction. Stick with it for a bit and see if it continues to improve.
Well done little girl!

englishbreakfast Wed 17-Jul-13 19:51:02

Thank you! Unfortunately these were the only successes of the day but it's a start.

We're at a stalemate on poos in the potty or on the toilet. I might have to be understanding of poo accidents. DD wanted to put her pants on to do a poo. I insisted that she sit on the loo, which meant no poo at all. I think she may appear any moment with a poo in her nighttime nappy, but otherwise I am going to cause her constipation problems if we get into a battle of wills.

SageYourResoluteOracle Wed 17-Jul-13 21:38:46

I'm so glad I've found this thread.

Englishbreakfast - well done for persevering!

Day 1 of PT with DD today. She's just turned two and has been showing signs of readiness since around 20 months. I've taken a week off work & I'm beginning to think that I've put too much pressure on the both of us to crack potty training.

I seem to have a little kitten too. She's wee'd on the carpet, twice on the sofa, in her bed at nap time and on my and DH's bed. She's also wee'd in the first nappy she was in at bedtime and then pooed in the second one (she often does a poo after being put to bed). The only success today was when she said, 'Oh! Wee wee!', sprinted to the potty, I helped her with her pants and then she did the tiniest poo: it was the size of a raisin!

My thinking is that DH should use his ruddy annual leave to train her. I need to go somewhere exotic where there are cocktails and gorgeous waiters. . .

Seriously though, given that her wees have been hours apart and big wees, she's got bladder control. Although she likes her Big Girl Pants and doesn't seem to mind about sitting on the potty, I think she sensed I was being a bit of a Spongebob Stresspants and maybe felt pressure to perform as every wee was when I wasn't watching her/ had nipped to another room for a split second. I started off with the potty in the living room but it's now back in the bathroom and I've said she's to go if she needs to.

I guess the poo-lette (ie very tiny poo) was progress as she did it completely unprompted. Good to know though that it can take a few days for there to be progress. I have to confess to reading Gina Ford's potty training book as lots of friends had recommended it but it says that there should be more wees in the potty by the end of day one than accidents. Epic fail!

I'm going to forge ahead for a few more days.

Who will hold my hand (and bring me Sauvignon Blanc??)

Also, whole other board but AIBU to have eaten two out of the three little bags of chocolate buttons I'd bought for bribery encouragement?

DD hasn't wee'd while sitting on my lap since the weekend, which is lovely as she sits on my lap quite a bit and it wasn't nice.

SageYourResoluteOracle Wed 17-Jul-13 22:02:39

Oh god. Wee on ones lap. Hadn't considered that as a possibility! shock

englishbreakfast Wed 17-Jul-13 22:44:21

holding hand Sage, good luck for the next few days! I'm trying to make a plan for the weekend as don't fancy being stuck at home and don't think she's going to be able to ask to go while we are outside, so I probably need a waterproof mat for the pram, and some pads for DD's pants!! Do people take a portable potty for outside? I can't see DD using public toilets for a while!

SageYourResoluteOracle Wed 17-Jul-13 22:53:23

Aww fanks English.

I bought a waterproof buggy/car seat cover, a pottete plus portable potty and I've got some pampers bed mats coming in the shopping delivery tomorrow. Totally agree: will lose plot if I can't get out at weekend. I took the pottete out this afternoon just in case. It's fab! You could get one from amazon on next day delivery!

Tomorrow is another day and I'm going to give it a week before stopping what I've started. Time to go to bed. I've found today exhausting!

SageYourResoluteOracle Wed 17-Jul-13 22:54:54

Public loos! Perish the thought!

englishbreakfast Wed 17-Jul-13 23:33:27

Have just ordered the Potette, hopefully it arrives by the weekend!

SageYourResoluteOracle Thu 18-Jul-13 13:10:55

How goes it today, fellow potty trainers?

Glad you've got a pottete- it looks fab, just awaits christening!

One wee outside, one wee on the sofa, twice DD has said 'Oh, wee wee!' But nothing's come out. I think it's that letting go thing. Am exhausted and the flat looks like a shit tip as I've been Focussing On Signals.

I'm not bloody giving in though until I've given this a good shot.


englishbreakfast Thu 18-Jul-13 15:01:18

I am at work today so DH is holding fort! We had a massive wee on the carpet in the morning (after she sat on the potty for about 5 minutes), then she did poo in the potty a few minutes later which was a result! They went out to a play group wearing two pairs of training pants to avoid any leakage smile and she had no accidents. They are back at home now and had no wees since the morning so I'm not sure if it's good bladder control or she's holding it in as it seems like a very long time. Have told DH to keep giving her drinks as it's hot so maybe she's sweating it out instead?

englishbreakfast Thu 18-Jul-13 15:05:54

Wow, DH just emailed to say that he's just found wee in the potty. She must have done it when he was talking to me on the phone a few minutes ago. Good girl!

SageYourResoluteOracle Thu 18-Jul-13 15:20:32

Yay! Awesome progress!

BeaWheesht Thu 18-Jul-13 15:24:04

We've been potty training dd since last week, it's going ok but she is holding her poo in and takes 5/6 tries before she does anything - it doesn't bother her but it isn't the most convenient!! Any tips?

Also she's been dry at night too but not peeing anymore in the day?

BeaWheesht Thu 18-Jul-13 15:24:49

Any more not anymore as in she is still peeing just no more than usual

englishbreakfast Thu 18-Jul-13 20:08:03

sorry Bea, no tips as haven't got a clue myself! smile Hopefully more experienced mums will be along soon. So, DD is in bed now, and on day 4 we had 2 poos and 1 wee in the potty, with the rest of the wees on the floor. Progress is VERY slow but it's progress... Sage, how's your day been today?

SageYourResoluteOracle Thu 18-Jul-13 21:21:19

Hey Bea! Welcome to English's 'prevention of lunacy over potty training' support thread! I have no suggestions what so ever but I do know that poos can be a common stumbling block. <unhelpful>

English apparently Winston Churchill once said, 'If you are going through hell then keep going'. This is now my motto.

Nothing in the potty today but had small breakthroughs such as DD sitting on potty of on volition twice and also running toward potty when we were outside shouting 'wee wee' her knickers were damp so I think she'd stopped herself mid pee and there was a tiny amount in the potty once I'd popped her on. She's a feisty, stubborn lass just like me so I'm now all casual (trying to be anyway). I've decided (after me ending up almost in tears this afternoon- pathetic, I know) that I'm going to carry on and see the week out. I just need to out-stubborn my little girl.

She looks so cute in her pants though. Was walking around with one bum cheek hanging out today and ooohhh she's so cute!

Bon chance ladies!

It is very much two steps forward, one step back. DD did a poo on the toilet at nursery (they have been fab with her). She has run to the loo twice after nursery but been unable to get on it in time due to moving her step into the lounge to jump off. She had a proper melt down about me moving the step back into the loo so that she can climb onto the loo (she isn't as keen on the potty). I have cleaned a lot of wee out of the carpet in the downstairs loo. No idea why it has carpet in the first place. I don't think the previous owners gave much thought to us when they bought cream carpet throughout grin.

BeaWheesht Thu 18-Jul-13 22:34:33

Thanks guys - yep I know poos can be an issue as ds was dry at 2 but didn't do a poo in the toilet until he was bloody three! Dd is doing everything in the potty / toilet but its jut the endless 'need a poo' runs to the loo to produce nothing until the 7/8th attempt - it's such hard work and ds is ill and I've had no sleep - excuses excuses!

On a positive note dd managed to use a loo a few times now when out as about which obviously don't have toilet sets for little bums on them smile also is asking now to go rather than me reminding her / asking her.

They'll all get there but I completely sympathise with the tears , on our 5th 'I need a poo' trip by 8am I was losing the will to live!

englishbreakfast Thu 18-Jul-13 23:03:22

Well, here is to tomorrow. Good luck and lot of patience to everyone!

BeaWheesht Thu 18-Jul-13 23:10:09

Same to you!

TitianSpirit Thu 18-Jul-13 23:38:06

Ok, I'm on the other side and have a 3.6 DD who is dry most nights & loves the loo.

I hope this helps a little. The longer you leave it the easier it is.

DD is strong willed but gentle & sensitive. At 2.8 mths was potty trained in 24 hrs(with 2 weeks prep work). She was showing signs of being ready from 2 so I allowed her to try but it was equally hit and miss. So I took the pressure off and left it 6months (she was ready after about 3 months but our family wasn't, things were happening).
So brought it out again but didn't try her, instead for 2 weeks I kept the potty in the toilet so dolly or teddy could go when she went with me. I also allowed her easy access to a quiet spot so she could go in the nappy. I worked out her routine as I got the nursery to pop a time beside her movements. DD was an afternoon girl. If there was no show she was a next morning then again late at night or thru the night girl. During this time I also allowed her to see her dirty nappies both types. At first she was shocked (at the poo! her poo!), but then she relaxed. At the end of 2 weeks (I work part-time so it took me this long) I bought a simple padded potty with a lid and stickers to put on it. She still loves it. I popped her on every 2 hours. bingo she got it. Only had about 3 accidents the first month. She is dry most nights but with the heat I'm not rushing anything. More fluids = more mistakes at night. She uses it to stand on to wash her hands now. Good luck & best wishes.

englishbreakfast Fri 19-Jul-13 07:27:01

Brilliant to hear your DD is doing so well Titian. When DD pooed in the potty yesterday, she then had a proper look at it for the first time, and there was such a funny look of disgust on her face. Didn't stop her trying to stick her hand it it though! smile

Breathe, we've got carpet everywhere in the flat too and I'm just grateful for the hot weather as at least it dries very quickly!

We are now in day 5, DD did a wee in the nappy in the morning and nothing in the potty yet. I'm at work today so DH will be on potty duty. I'll keep you posted how today goes for us.

SageYourResoluteOracle Fri 19-Jul-13 15:29:53

Waves at Titian! Thanks for that- I had read that it was a good idea to show the little ones their poo in case they were freaked out at being suddenly confronted by it. DD just gazed with awe and wonder at the teeny poo she did the other night. 'Oooooh! Poo poo!'

I fear I'm becoming a potty bore and my friends and family possibly want me shot! <disclaimer: that was in jest!>

But, drum roll: Day 3 today and DD did her first two wees on the potty. The first was partly her letting me know and me partly spotting her cues and the second was totally unprompted. Two followed on the floor but I'm elated! Might hire a marching band! So I'm going to stick it out for the week and just see.

Bless her though- she was a bit agitated just before going the first time. I think it must be a very different feeling than going in a nappy.

How is everyone else doing?

englishbreakfast Fri 19-Jul-13 19:33:57

Excellent news Sage, well done to you DD! Today was much of the same for us. Managed to catch a couple of wees in the potty, one was on the carpet and one in the nappy during nap time. DD's got a fever today though so maybe that's why she's been a bit disinterested. Onwards and upwards hopefully!

SageYourResoluteOracle Fri 19-Jul-13 22:09:11

Oh bless your little pickle English- I hope she's feeling better soon. This weather can't be helping!

Final count for today: 4 in potty, 2 when DD told us she needed to go, 1 me spotting and 1 her yelling 'wee wee' and me catching.

It's official: I've become a potty bore.

How to get little ones to do a poo though????????

TitianSpirit Sat 20-Jul-13 01:26:36

Waves back to english and sage smile smile

hope your DD is feeling better. hate it when they're ill. I always wish I could take it away from them somehow.

sorry for the late post but only getting 5 mins now.

Poos are strange to do cos they feel the motion more um leaving their bum and don't immediately associate it with a poo.

I would change the dirty pullup and finish by tipping it into the loo with DD and giving it a flush with lots of praise. I'd point out at the same time that healthy poos are smelly. I let her come up with the idea to use the potty then tip it in so it doesn't stick to her bum.

Its a lot of work but well worth it. The key is to make it a fun game they are good at & build it up bit by bit. oh yeah and choc buttons helped a lot blush

hope your DD is feeling better soon. I've her in my thoughts.

englishbreakfast Sat 20-Jul-13 09:11:52

Thank you Titian! She's still asleep, which is highly unusual, as she's normally up around 7 - 7.30am. Not sure if we should carry on when she's unwell, but at the same time don't want to write off the last few days either... confused

TitianSpirit Sat 20-Jul-13 13:36:15

I really don't think that happens, I think she'll be pleased to show u what she remembers when u pick it up again. i'd give her time off cos she might start to get upset when she's not well, and start learning how to avoid rather than do. Just a thought. smile

englishbreakfast Sat 20-Jul-13 13:56:11

DD broke out in a rash today, nurse at 111 said it's most probably chicken pox sad. Now going for an out of hours GP appointment to confirm. We are carrying on with the potty for now as she seems to be willing. She weed in the potty in the morning and then when both DH and I were out of the room for a minute, we heard her calling and she was stood there with a potty with wee in it in her hand to give us grin. Although there was a wet patch on the carpet to, so she must have started weeing on the floor and then remembered about the potty!

BeaWheesht Sat 20-Jul-13 13:58:57

Awh bless her!

Chickenpox didn't make either of mine ill as such just itchy so fingers crossed she won't suffer too much

TitianSpirit Sat 20-Jul-13 20:10:30

awww bless her wee socks. Hope she's better soon. smile

Well done for her potty training. Looks like you've cracked it. wink

SageYourResoluteOracle Sat 20-Jul-13 22:20:39

Oh poor DD English. A friend's DD has just come down with the dreaded pox - it's no fun. I hope your little poppet feels better soon and isn't too itchy and miserable. And go her doing a wee and then proudly showing you- definitely sounds as if you've cracked it!

So, today was day 4 for us and DD had NO accidents! grin
All wees were pretty much unprompted (3 wees in total - she's certainly got bladder control). One of them we got just in time as her pants were a bit wet but I think we're getting there. . . with wees anyway.

Still no poos but we almost got one at bedtime. DD shouted 'oh! Wee wee' and, although she was already in pull ups ready for bed, I thought it best to help her pull them down and have a go. Very unfortunately (rookie error) she'd actually meant poo so flecks of poo came flying out as we were whipping the pull ups down. Her leg was smeared, outside of the potty was smeared. . . oh dear!

She's been pooing into pull ups during her afternoon nap and at night time but, to be fair, she's been doing this for a while at sleep time - way before potty training- so I think it's that she's relaxed and feels more able to 'let go' when she's asleep/almost asleep.

I'm going to try and give DD the main bulk of her daily fibre by lunchtime to hopefully change her number two timings.

I'm obsessed, aren't I?!

We had a wet nappy this morning, then no accidents all day (which was amazing as we have had a busy day). I'm not entirely convinced that DD has been drinking enough. She waited for her bedtime nappy to be on before doing a poo - which is fine by me.

englishbreakfast Sun 21-Jul-13 08:21:30

Yay Breathe and Sage DDs!

DD was dry during out trip to the doctor's yesterday but had a couple of accidents in the evening where she started to wee on the floor and had to be reminded to use potty, so would then run to the potty mid wee and finish there! Her nappy was full this morning and although she's sat on potty a few times, she's not produced anything yet today. She's not drinking enough so maybe doesn't want to go. Tbh I'm not expecting much progress until she's better as she's probably distracted by feeling a bit miserable, but we will probably stick with the training unless it starts to upset her.

Your poor DD - I hope she feels better soon.

englishbreakfast Sun 21-Jul-13 16:47:35

DD's been miserable all day today and we had nothing but accidents. She sat on the potty a lot but not managed to go once despite clearly wanting and would then get up and pee on the floor. This afternoon she started to get upset, as was trying the potty but not managing to do anything. She's also got spots around her wee / poo area so must be feeling pretty uncomfortable down there sad. DH is not keen to carry on as feels she's feeling rubbish so we shouldn't be making her more uncomfortable, so we've decided to stop for now. Will start again when she's better and hopefully some of the stuff she's learned over the past few days will have stuck. Best of luck everyone with your potty training! x

SageYourResoluteOracle Sun 21-Jul-13 22:06:07

Awww. Poor poppet. I think you're doing the right thing. She just needs to be comfy right now. Good luck to you too! It's been nice having support.

I think you are doing the right thing - prioritising her comfort now. We stopped and tried again about 2 months later. This didn't seem to be a problem for DD and it has been much more successful this time.

BeaWheesht Sun 21-Jul-13 22:45:38

I'd stop too, the urine will stung her skin so better not to have it running down legs etx. Have you tied bicarbonate of soda bath? They really helped when dd had pox.

Well dd was dry last night again and we left her with dh's mum for a couple of hours so we could get peace to go to Homebase (the glamour!) and she asked to go for a pee and went no bother smile

I'm probably speaking too soon but I don't think she's had any accidents for about 10/11 days now and has been dry maybe 8 nights too.

She's a little madam though as she now says 'need a pee' whenever we are trying to get her to do something she doesn't want to do eg bedtime / getting told off / getting dressed.....

englishbreakfast Sun 21-Jul-13 23:05:12

Aww, thanks ladies! It was weird, I wanted to put a pull up nappy on DD in the afternoon as she was getting frustrated clearly wanting to go but holding it in, and she just refused it outright. So we resorted to training pants. She sat on the potty a few times in the evening of her own accord but didn't do anything, although a couple of times got off it crying as was unable to go, so I am now worried she might be creating negative associations, so will get her to wear pull-ups until we are sorted with this chicken pox nonsense...x

BeaWheesht Sun 21-Jul-13 23:35:53

How old is she English? Old enough to explain why you're putting her back in pull ups?

englishbreakfast Mon 22-Jul-13 18:32:46

Hi Bea, DD's 2y 4m, so could possibly understand but she doesn't seem to be willing to cooperate at the moment! We had hardly any sleep last night as she was feeling poorly, and things were not helped by her screaming she wanted a potty in the middle of the night but not managing to go when sat on it, she then had a full blown tantrum at 3am! shock It took a while to persuade her to stay in a nappy. She asked for potty again when she got up in the morning and managed to wee in it, but then she'd had accidents all day. I don't want to force her into nappies if she doesn't want to wear them, so we're letting her get on with it and she's taking turns wearing pants and going bare bum. We just keep reminding her from time to time that she can go to the potty if she wants to wee / poo but not to worry if not. We have armed ourselves with lots of cleaning products!

BeaWheesht Mon 22-Jul-13 18:53:47

Poor wee soul. (No pun intended)

Well I spoke to soon, dd wet herself just now I think because she was too busy playing outside!

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