Why won't my 3 yr old poo on the toilet - been trying for months!!

[katieTu]

I really do feel stressed and at the end of my tether with this one...
My son went from nappies to weeing in the potty or toilet so easily, it took a matter of days with hardly any accidents. Great I thought, this potty training is easier than I thought it would be.
However that was back in September and since then he just will not poo in anything but his pants. I went through a stage of using pull up pants as it was getting so messy EVERY day but then I thought I'd stick with his normal pants as that might make him want to go in the toilet so it's not next to his skin - but it isn't working. He tells us he needs to go, will let us put him on the toilet but then says he doesn't need to go, gets off and then 10mins later will tell us he's gone in his pants.
I've tried reward charts, bribery(!) etc but he's just not getting it.
Surely it shouldn't be taking this long!! Anyone else experiencing similar/ has any advice I'd be so grateful... 😔

[Pancakeflipper]

We had similar. But they will get there eventually (but it's silent screamingly frustrating)
There could be several reasons.
We tried various tactics. The one that worked was sitting on the loo in the pull up to do the poo. Then a nappy stuck under the loo seat like a poo hammock - they'd sit on the loo pant free and do the poo into the nappy. Then one day I 'ran' out of nappies and they're just did a poo in loo with a huge reward after.

Your health visitor should have some info and strategies on this - it's quite common apparently.

[WhatWouldFlopDo]

I'm with you, DD is the same and she's started withholding poo. I've phoned the HV this morning. It's hard

[Squiggles86]

I've read various internet posts and topics about this and a lot of people have had success with a story called poo goes to pooland with this particular issue. It's available as a pdf online and written by a psychology student doing a PhD. I don't have any experience of this but thought I'd share what I know from my weeks of searching for an answer to my daughter's potty training woes! X