Regression (after new sibling arrival)

[pettyprudence]

Well I thought we had escaped the toilet regression after the arrival of dd but 4-5 weeks in DS has regressed. He has been using the toilet for 5 months and no accidents for months. He still has a pull up at night time. He was heading towards being dry at night but then we had a few night time accidents so keeping them for now. He has just turned 3 btw.

DS has now started pooing and weeing in his nappy and pants. If I catch him doing the "wee dance" he refuses to acknowledge that he needs a wee. I have tried being kind/Sympathetic ("never mind darling, next time!"), cross, taken his favourite activity and have now reached my wits end and put him back in a pull up pant this morning and taken away all big boy privileges and refuse to call him a big boy. This probably isn't the right way to go but I have had enough of cleaning up for the last 10 days. This has hit at dd's firt developmental leap so she is also really unsettled.

He never ever tells me that he's had an accident - i just have to notice the waddle/damp patch/puddle/smell (unlike when he was toilet training).

So how do I get him to stop? The hv advised re-reading toddler taming but the sibling rivalry section doesn't have anything useful for ds's behaviour and toilet training doesn't seem to cover regressions.

Sorry for epic post!

[PirateJones]

Have you tried going back to rewards with him?
It’s normally caused by sibling jealousy, “the baby gets his nappy changed why can’t I”, but obviously not as thought out.
continue reminding him that he's a big boy and only big boys can play and do "what ever his favorite thing is", Then give him lots of little jobs to do to help you out with the baby.