3M old potty training parents - anyone else in the UK done this?

(14 Posts)
NewJewels Tue 22-Oct-13 17:34:09

So, DC is nearly 3M now and, having always been quite clear about not liking dirty nappies (real or disposable), is now making it clearer when about to go.

So, I've got a potty I'm holding DC over when I see the need - we're only Day 2 but so far have done 5 or so wees and 3 poos on it and only sat on it it twice without going at all.

I'm pretty confident that we'll improve on that too smile

BUT I'd be interested in how to teach DC to communicate the need to DP and others - some kind of baby signing?

AND I'm curious about what we do when DC starts sitting/crawling - can imagine some difficulties getting on/off...

Any others let their baby train them so young?

OrangeOpalFruit Tue 22-Oct-13 17:44:05

This is the norm in most parts of the world, and I think should be more widely adopted here. Leaving potty training until 3 which is fairly common only seems to make it more difficult and drawn out. Schools are seeing more toiletting problems than they used to and I think that's directly linked to the trend for later training. By age 3 children are able to hold on and resist the training process, often leading to constipation and associated diarhoea/loss of control and other longer term problems.

Troubledjo Tue 22-Oct-13 17:52:37

My DD was completely out of nappies at 17 months - much older than this, but the nursery still thought I was completely mad! I think that when they are so young though, it is less about getting them to communicate when they want to go, than getting them in a routine where they just go anyway.
My DD talked early so it wasn't an issue, but with a baby I think the idea would be to put them on the potty regularly so it just becomes a habit, and as long as you do it often enough they shouldn't need to go at other times. (This is what I did with her even though she could talk.)
I used to put lots of books near the potty so she would just sit on it for a while and look at books till she had finished.
Also, when they are so young, it is more of a gradual process (in the same way as they learn most things) so you might still have to use nappies some of the time.

NewJewels Tue 22-Oct-13 21:02:50

Glad to hear that I'm not alone - I find it very odd seeing friends kids in nappies at 2+ but don't actually know anyone doing anything different!

I'm not particularly planning on taking nappies off at present (I've just been taking them on and off like knickers for the potty) - for one thing we're in the middle of building works at home so it won't always be practical to get to the potty safely in time. BUT I am planning on washing them less often :-)

marshkat Fri 25-Oct-13 23:35:27

This sounds great was thinking of buying a pooty for my 7 month old, and tought i must be mad! But my DSS is nearly 7 years and has major toileting probs. x

dogindisguise Sat 26-Oct-13 10:33:44

Google nappy-free baby, baby-led potty training and elimination communication. And good luck!

NewJewels Sat 26-Oct-13 19:33:33

Thanks for the suggestions for reading. :-)

Brilliantly as I was beginning to type a reply baby told me about an impending poop so we were delayed.

Having now googled I see that we're relying on communication more than timing although that might also be handy.

Interestingly I intuitively sit DC facing me which is opposite to how a lot seem to do it. I have encouragement on my side... but I expect maybe (once older and trying this out and about behind bushes) probably wetter toes!

Val007 Mon 28-Oct-13 10:18:40

I did this with my brother. I would hold him over the bathroom sink and make a 'shhhhhh' noise and he would go. But I was 18 and single, had all the time in the world. With my first child, she was very resistant to potty training and my second... I had to express breast milk for about 6-8 hours per day whilst working full time (mostly from home), so had absolutely no time for potty training. However, I believe in early potty training, as have done it with my brother and it works! The earlier - the better smile

We did the same as you're describing, NewJewels. DD is now 18mo, and has been sitting on the potty since she was 5mo at nappy-changing time. She did her first poo on the potty at 8mo (she did some wees before then, but they were always just luck), and since then has communicated with me that she needs to do a poo most times. I've probably changed about 15 dirty nappies in the last ten months, which isn't too bad grin

She never learnt a sign for the potty, nor can she verbally tell me she needs it yet. But she has a certain look she gives me, and I just know we have a minute or two to get the potty in time.

The last few weeks she's been giving me the same look a lot more often, and it's meant she's needed a wee, too. So this week, I bit the bullet and took the nappies off whilst we've been at home. She's wet her trousers twice (and been really surprised at the feeling), but other than that, every wee and poo has gone in the potty. Either she brings the potty to me, or she points at it and squeaks. Sometimes it's just my instinct that tells me she needs to go. But whatever it is, it does seem to be working, much to my amazement.

She's actually far more regular with her wees than I thought she would be. She needs to go about once an hour, generally. And her poos are nearly always straight after lunch, so that's helpful.

DD always sits facing me on her potty - I never thought to put her facing the other way.

I'm six months pregnant with DC2 and vaguely hoping DD will be out of nappies by the time baby comes along. Most people tell me that she'll regress the minute the baby's here, but as she has used the potty most of her life, I don't think it will be too bad. <naive>

Keep us updated!

NewJewels Wed 13-Nov-13 23:28:41

Val007, BabyLabyrinth really nice to hear positive and realistic experiences :-)

We're still doing the queue-based approach when at home or isiting relatives we can use a potty at and LO has even managed to use a 'grown-up' toilet once when held over it in a pub!

I'd say there are usually well over four poops a day on the potty now and probably more wees too. So, whilst we're still changing nappies it is definitely cutting it down... will see how it goes...

milktraylady Mon 09-Dec-13 19:48:09

Brilliant to hear someone else is doing 'EC' too! (Elimination communication) (google diaper free baby too)

My DD is 8months & she poos on the loo each morning & usually a wee too. Then I'm just aware in the day if I think she's needing a poo & put her on the potty. Usually we catch the poo.

Something I've done from reading the diaper free baby book- make a noise to associate with poo and another one for wees. When you are sure they are doing it, make the noise. I did this from birth & she knows now the noises.

I'm also making a really simple (one handed as she's a bit wobbly still) sign when she's actually pooing. In the hope that she can communicate to me pre speaking.

It's brilliant! And apparently my granny did this with her children!

scaevola Mon 09-Dec-13 19:52:01

You could try looking for 1950s (or earlier) baby care np manuals. In the days before disposables, and when not everyone had a washing machine, early 'training' was the norm.

In the initial stages, it's more about catching the relflex (warm bottom n cold rim usual means something comes out), but as capacity for voluntary control increases, so does reliability.

milktraylady Mon 09-Dec-13 20:05:30

My DD sits on the loo, in a potty insert, I say our 'cue' word, she looks at me & laughs & actively poos on purpose!
So they do have control from when they are small. By keeping in disposables it teaches them to ignore the feeling of needing to poo.

Laradaclara Tue 10-Dec-13 22:31:00

We have done this a little, partly due to sheer laziness and not wanting to change and wash too many poo-filled nappies. I started from birth and for the first 4-5 months we were probably more proactive than we are now. I concluded after a while that it was taking too much of my focus and we were constantly putting DD on and off the potty to see if it was a communication or not. It ended up interrupting other things she was focused on and I concluded these were more important than dry nappies. Other people may be able to juggle more tasks than me though! I would say she never communicated very effectively with wees though poos have always been easier. We almost always use nappies still, though do use washable nappies which makes it easier. DD is now 16 months and almost always signals for a poo by stopping what she is doing, looking at us with a concentrated look and making a grunting noise. If we do miss she'll lie down to ask for her nappy to be changed. She can often hold it for a few minutes though we tend to run for a potty as soon as she signals. We do miss on occasions and we don't worry if there are times we can't be as proactive as we are at home. If we have a quiet day then we'll aim to catch wees too and as she is almost always dry at night, I'll always sit her on the potty for the first wee of the morning.

I suppose my conclusion has been that you can do aspects of EC in very half-hearted kind of way and still have some success.

However, to finally answer some of your questions. DP worked out this was worth doing as soon as he realised it is easier to empty a potty down the toilet and do a quick wipe with toilet paper than it is to change a dirty nappy! I then left him to it and he worked out when she was signalling soon enough. My mother also looks after DD frequently and although she was initially sceptical, once she had caught a few wees and poos she too decided it was a good idea and has also worked out her own way of doing things. I have heard of nurseries that are willing to give it a go too.
You can just suggest they try by timings a bit - eg, after a nap, after food or every hour which is what I suggested to my mother to start with. Alternatively, in our experience its not the end of the world if they don't bother and aren't interested in doing EC too. DD seemed to adapt fine.

As for a more mobile baby - getting her in and out of nappies is the tricky thing. She seems quite content once on the potty though you can always distract with books or toys or TV. Its often a sign she's finished if she wants to get up and if she does we don't push it and just put her back in the nappy.

We're now wondering about the next step which is why I'm lurking on the potty training topic and considering starting my own thread on that one!

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