at wits end with poo smearing daughter!

(9 Posts)
angelarivers Sat 31-Aug-13 21:30:53

I started potty training my 2.2 year old because she showed all the signs of being ready, plus she would occasionally remove poo from her nappy during the day, leaving deposits on the floor. Training has gone well, and after 2 weeks she asks to use the potty or toilet for both wee and poo. The problem is nap and bedtime - doesn't matter if she's done a poo relatively recently she will, without fail, poo in her nappy then fetch it out and smear it over the cot, the sheets, the wall - everywhere shock! I've tried putting her on the potty at bedtime, but it's like she deliberately holds a bit back for playing with as soon as I'm out the door. Sometimes it's literally 30 seconds after the bedroom door closes before she's popped one out! I've done angry, indifferent, upset... Left her sitting in it for 10 minutes... Taken away all her teddies... Begged, pleaded and reasoned with her... Nothing has made her stop. Any ideas? Please!

katieelh Sat 31-Aug-13 21:40:58

Gosh how tricky! Could you put her in a babygro on backwards so she can't get to the nappy? Or tape round the nappy so she can't get it off?

forevergreek Sat 31-Aug-13 21:44:44

All in one babygro and sleeping bag that's he can't undo

angelarivers Sat 31-Aug-13 21:56:24

Hadn't thought of putting the gro on backwards! That's inspired, thanks katieelh I'll try that tomorrow afternoon and let you know how it goes. Finally I'm smiling!

Judyandherdreamofhorses Sat 31-Aug-13 22:06:14

We had this. I posted about it (different username though, I think).I don't remember what we did, but we felt we tried everything.

Exactly one year ago, we were away on holiday in in-laws caravan. She was just 3. She smeared poo all over her bedroom. We spent the next day cleaning it off the walls.

The next night, she decided she wasn't wearing night nappies any more. She has never done it again!

I don't think it was anything we did/ didn't do. I do think we started toilet training too soon - at just 2 - but she showed all the signs of being 'ready'. She wasn't though, really. It was a long, hard slog.

It was horrible though. Sympathies. Hope it stops soon.

cakebar Sat 31-Aug-13 22:06:58

DS did this, exactly as you describe. I even found it smeared along the skirting boards under his bed. He eventually gave himself piles (very rare for a young child) from forcing it out so make sure you check she is ok down there sad.

I would say it was the most difficult thing we have had to deal with. I would ask for a visit from an experienced HV to talk through what to do. Apparently it is common but people don't like to admit to it.

In our case the HV talked through DS personality and we agreed a way forward (she had a variety of strategies) and she left us a load of kid's books about poo basically living in the toilet. She was helpful but I sought her help too late and actually DS grew out of it about the same time.

FWIW he now toilets totally normally and doesn't remember. If I told him he would think it was disgusting. He is by nature stubborn, inquisitive, enjoys a reaction and doesn't need a lot of sleep and I think that all contributed.

SageYourResoluteOracle Mon 02-Sep-13 21:42:33

You have my sympathies. I could have written your post word for word in July. DD now always sleeps in a sleeping bag (full toddler lock down!) but generally doesn't poo in her sleep-time pull-ups any more. It was pretty horrific at the time though especially when she did it when we were staying at a friend's place. I'm ashamed to say that I sobbed!

As a PP said, I think it's one of these things that's common but not talked about. The hardest thing for me was that a couple of times DD had some poo on her face, just next to her mouth. . . I can only wonder. . .

One suggestion I read was to provide children going through a smearing phase with lots of messy/tactile play-type activities eg play dough, corn flour so that they're given legitimate access to gooey stuff.

Good luck and wine!

Does she do messy play? I'd be encouraging that as it might be wanting to experience textures.

Also react the same every time. Indifference and clean up.

KateKateKate Wed 18-Sep-13 23:07:47

I totally feel for you. We're just coming out of that phase (fingers crossed). We nicknamed my daughter Poodini, due to her ability to wiggle out of any constraint (backwards sleeping bag, gaffer taped nappy, backwards baby gro) to smear. Our solution? A halter-necked swimming costume over t shirt and leggings. It seems extreme, but was the only barrier that worked. Then we waited it out...

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