3yo holds wee for HOURS

(5 Posts)
okthen Fri 15-Feb-13 16:10:10

I'm getting close to my wit's end with my potty-trained (day and night) dd. she will hold her wee for so long that I'm sure it's not good for her. She doesn't have accidents, but she very rarely instigates a toilet trip (apart from for poos which she is good about). She is not scared of the loo, just refuses to go.

Against all my intentions it has become a battle of wills. I know I should probably leave her to tell me, even if it takes all day. But the problem is she gets sillier and sillier the more she needs the loo, and I can't bear the thought of her discomfort. Plus her behaviour gets really frustrating, and having a baby to look after too makes it v hard for me.

Stupidly I've done things like, today, said we can't go to the park til she's had a wee (she hasn't been for six hours!). So she is just sat on her potty resolutely not weeing, and knowing she has the total upper hand as she doesn't care that much about going to the park. It's the same with all forms of bribery/reward. I think she prefers the power!

I find it so frustrating.
Why won't she just go to the loo when she knows and I know she needs it?!

jetstar Sat 16-Feb-13 06:52:35

Hi! My 3yo DD also goes hours between wees. I ask her if she needs a wee but don't push it and she doesn't often have accidents. Sometimes she decides herself not long after I have suggested it that she does need a wee after all and goes and does it! I do worry that she isn't drinking enough and try as much as I can to get her to drink but she doesn't drink as much as other children. Does your DD drink a lot? We used a lot of rewards and still do at times if necessary. I think you might have to back right off for a while and see what happens - only my opinion smile

Yamyoid Sat 16-Feb-13 07:04:54

My ds is 6 now and usually only wees when he wakes up, at lunchtime (because I've told him to) and before bed. I was mortified the other day when it turned out he hadn't gone in the morning, didn't go all day at school then looked a bit strange at dinner time and rushed off.
He doesn't drink much, which I know is bad but I just think the more you make a big deal out of something, the worse it gets for everyone (which I've done with his sleeping).
I make sure he drinks with every meal and just offer drinks regularly. Maybe I'm not doing enough but he seems ok.

okthen Sat 16-Feb-13 11:23:38

Thanks for replies- I agree that we need to back off completely. And try to ignore the Dance of Desperation! Upping liquid intake also a good idea.

atrcts Sat 23-Feb-13 20:09:39

The only thing about allowing them to hold on is that eventually there will be a likely infection to treat. So the idea of increasing fluids is definitely a really good way forward smile

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