Is this a sign DD (27 months) is not ready?

[cardamomginger]

Hi,

Only Day Two, but nerves are shot to bits already! We are on Day 2 of potty training. Yesterday we had 7 accidents and 2 successes (but only becasue she was sitting on the potty at the time). Today 1 success (again just happened to be sitting on the potty) and 1 accident.

I don't mind about the accidents and I don't mind clearing up the mess. I expect this. But it's DD's overall 'exuberance' about the whole thing that's driving me to drink! She wants to stand in her potty, not sit, she wants to draw on it with crayons, she wants to keep taking the removable middle bit out, she wants to climb all over it. When we have an accident, she wants to paddle in it. When we have a success she wants to stick her hands in it and splash or, even worse, shove her face in it. When I am trying to clear up and sort her out, her 'exuberance' really makes things impossible.

Yesterday evening I ended up shouting and with both of us in tears. At lunchtime today, there was a small amount of shouting and one of us was in tears .

I'm fully prepared to admit that I just don;t want to do this now (or ever!). I have to have major surgery in February, so what with the holiday break and no nursery, I feel we have a window of opportunity. If we don;t do it now, it'll be summer before we next get a chance (there's a long recovery after my op).

Any thoughts? Is her playing around a sign she's not ready?
Thank you!

[imissredwine]

Mine's the same age +/-

I feel your pain. She's obsessed with sitting on the toilet, hates the potty, spends forever washing her hands like Lady MacBeth, throws loo roll everywhere then demands a nappy back on for a poo.

I figure it's just fear of change for them. The 'big girl' toilet is miles away from what they're used to. Imagine someone suddenly asked you to wear a nappy and go in there... I think I'd play up, make a fuss etc and want to go back to what I'm used to.

Good luck. Buy red wine. x

[cardamomginger]

Thanks! And good luck to you too! Didn't want to get out of bed this morning, as I didn't want to face another day of it!!

[cardamomginger]

Oh, and for you and for me

[sw11mumofone]

My DD started a bit like this and our first day i was a nervous wreck. I still felt like that for days although i was very lucky and she just seemed to click on day 2. The thing that really worked for us was star charts. The potty went in the middle of the room and the chart was pinned up right in front of her on the fireplace so it was in her face all the time. It just reminded her to keep sitting on the potty. Every time she got 3 stars she got a small present (party bag filler type thing). We are 2 weeks in and since day 1 we have had 1 accident. She now doesnt use the potty and tells us when she wants to go and goes up to the toilet. However I would say that if you are getting really stressed and she just isnt taking to it I would put her back in nappies and leave it till the summer. she will still only be 2 and 3/4 and lots of people leave it till 3 years old. If you find she is very ready before that you could end up cracking it in one day and your recovery may not be an issue. Good luck! It is very stressful I agree!

[LetsKateWin]

The first time I tried with DD there were lots of tears. She washed her hands in the potty when she did a wee, she would get really upset when I emptied the potty, I couldn't get her on the potty, then I couldn't get her off. After she woke up that night completely rigid and screaming her head off I couldn't face another day. I put it off for a few months and there was a world of difference the second time. She was ticking all the boxes on the checklist, but she wasn't ready.

I hope you find a solution. The stickers worked really well for us too second time round.

Good luck.

[cardamomginger]

Thanks for the advice - sorry was away from the thread for a few days and didn't thank you earlier.

Not sure what to do. Most of the time she just doesn't get that she needs to pull her pants down first - which isn't that helpful as she can't go commando all day every day! Other than that she had been a bit better the last few days, but today we've had 3 accidents, including one where she just squatted and didn't even attempt to get to the potty. Unlike on previous days, she's hasn't been that fussed about having an accident and with 2 of them, I'm not sure she's really noticed (on previous days, she's announced she did a wee and had then gone to sit on the potty). Maybe she's just having an off day....

Generally everything else is sliding, as I'm focussing mostly on potty-related stuff. So we're watching FAR FAR More TV than we otherwise would. And meal times, which are erratic at the best of times, has gone right out of the window.

I really wanted her 'done' by the time she went back to nursery tomorrow, or at least by the beginning of next week. But I'm wondering now whether to stop for a while, and just go back to wees on potty when she gets up and before her bath.

Dunno! But for all of us!