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Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

Potty training

Do I or don't I?

1 reply

temporarystate · 19/02/2011 20:31

I need some advice!

DS is 2.11m (with a younger brother 14m) and so far I have not attempted to PT because he simply was not ready.

I did not attempt it previously because he did not have the language or understanding, and tbh my focus was on behaviour because with the arrival of his new brother and going to play school hitting and throwing were a higher priority!

In the last 2months his behaviour, language and understanding have all significantly improved and in my mind I had earmarked half term for starting PT.

Bought the 'special seat' for the toilet, have showed him it and how it works, talked about him being a big boy and trying it himself, he watches me and always wants to 'see' what he has done in his nappy.

In readiness for PT I have also been encouraging him to get involved in dressing himself and undressing himself a bit more, walking down the stairs without holding my hand, feeding himself his 'whole' dinner etc etc

However, as the days have gone by he has started saying 'no' when I talk about using his 'special seat', and for all the other stuff (dressing etc) he has started to immediately say 'can't do it' 'need help' 'mummy help me' even though he CAN do it.

He has also started to get a bit more aggressive again towards his brother (rough)

So, I am thinking its all been too much too quickly? Is this a reaction to me talking about potty training? Is this 'can't do it' business something I should listen to or should I just continue to encourage him to do it for himself

I think deep down I am getting a little frustrated with doing all these things for him still when he is perfectly capable but, of course his little brother still needs my help so I can see why he gets jealous. But I am really careful to praise him when he does do it.

Am so confused! Should I persist with the independence training and potty training?? Or is this a sign to leave it??
Thanks for reading

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spindleygiraffe · 19/02/2011 21:42

I don't know, a lot depends on you as well. It could be a time when he is really made to be big and important. Mummy has to spend time with him and help him whilst little one can play elsewhere.
It is a demanding time and he will need lots of help. If you are happy to drop everything and run with him. It is so important to grit teeth when they wee on the floor again, or poo in their pants, especially when you know they can do it. As you said it is frustrating. Believe me, I know. My son wee'd on the stairs when the midwife was there, my husband was in bed ill and my little one was meant to be being checked...... remain calmConfused

Would be benefit from being the 'big brother'?
Do sticker charts work? My children have never been interested in stickers (magic stars for my son potty training and now haribo for my daughter - remember with summer approaching, rewards needed for months chocolate melts in the car, bags etc!).

Good luck, he might take to it really quickly.

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