New Baby - 3 year old totally trained - now accidents

[mummyosar]

My 3 year old daughter has been totally toilet trained for 9 months with very few accidents.

6 weeks ago i had a new baby and now she is having lots of accidents and refuses to do a number 2 on the toilet although is still doings number 1s. Its getting worse as at first she would tell us she'd had an accident - now she won't until we notice ourselves.

I have no idea what to do.....

Any help appreciated.

[EdgarAleNPie]

bring back rewards - make sure you are being really cheerful - go for a wee together - up drinks and go often -

[mummyd2010]

I have a 3 year old and an 18 month old, my eldest has been training for very many months and she has been very sucessful but seems to revert back when she feels she is not getting the attention ie. when my youngest is ill. Infact she will wee and look across to us with a smile! as she would then find it fun to be changed and receive what she feels is fuss.

Grandually we get her back on the right track when we have charts in our living room which she ticks herself when she has done a wee or poo and four ticks equals a treat from the treat bucket filled with mini chocs/sweets etc.

Also myself and at pre-school we are telling her she is a big girl and not a 'baby' like her bro.
LOTS OF LUCK

[Jules2011]

My DS was exactly the same. He was only 19 months but had not had a dirty nappy for moths previous always went on the toilet for poos! He just started regressing. We tried not to pay too much attention. Simply cleaned him up without any attention given, including telling him off. When he did go on the loo we went over the top with praise. He was fine again within a couple of weeks. Also we used to have him nearby for the babies dirty nappies and we'd talk about how babies do poos in nappies and big boys on the loo etc. Good luck x

[hab35]

Hi mummyosar,
I've had exactly the same experience when DS No. 2 was born. It WILL eventually settle itself down. Just try not to pay it too much attention (I took far too long to follow my own advice and can remember many instances of stripping and washing DS No. 1 in floods of hysterical tears). It is just attention seeking, not amazingly helpful advice when you're trying to juggle poos in pants and new baby I know, but that's all it is. I would think whatever techniques you used (choc buttons, sticker chart) for potty training would also work now, or if you can manage it you could reward with "Mummy time" (w/o baby) if she goes on the loo. Eventually DS1 decided that he was not a baby anymore, and even got himself out of nappies at night too soon afterwards, so it can be positive, honestly! Good Luck!

[NellyTheElephant]

My DD2 had been trained for about 3 months before DS was born, she was fine initially after his birth, but when he was about 3 months old she had a total regression on poos (wees remained fine). I was having a really tough time with DS at the time and I think suffering from PND and after about 10 days decided I didn't have the stamina for pooey pants so I put her back into nappies for a couple of days. She then had an ENORMOUS melt down and said categorically no more nappies (at night either), so I told she could have another go with pants and went out and bought a large chocolate bar and put it on a high shelf above the loo very visibly (hygene... ?? well...) and told her she could have it when a poo went in the loo. I tried not to make any fuss about accidents (a big change from my previous crazy crying and wailing and pointless asking why why why over and over again - PND remember!) or say anything as I cleaned her up except to vaguely indicate the chocolate bar and say what a shame she couldn't have it yet. The second day she managed a poo in the loo and got the chocolate. After that we went back to sticker charts - a sticker for each poo in the loo and 3 stickers in a row got some chocolate. Within a week or so she was back on track. Good luck - it will resolve itself sooner or later.

[Sopster]

I would also go with the star chart idea. I used one called the My Big Star Chart from encourageandpraise.co.uk. They also do a pink one especially for girls from 3 or 4 yrs old I think. We used the smiley face stickers for each performance on the potty, a star sticker at the end of the day for a whole dry day and then a little reward every 10 stickers (choc buttons, extra stories at bedtime, park trips, small toy/book). Just try and remember for your own sanity that new siblings cause loads of children to regress for a while in way or another (when my daughter was born last year my son who was 3 at the time reverted back to being spoon fed and even though his sister is quite capable of feeding herself now sometimes he STILL wants me to do it!!) and she will get back on track. Good luck.