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November 2012 - The weaning adventure continues

(1000 Posts)
StuntNun Fri 14-Jun-13 19:25:05
PurplePidjin Fri 14-Jun-13 19:38:49

brew

fruitpastilles Fri 14-Jun-13 20:06:50

wine

Pikz Fri 14-Jun-13 20:16:32

biscuit

BigPigLittlePig Fri 14-Jun-13 21:07:57

bear

Sophiathesnowfairy Sat 15-Jun-13 08:19:21

Oi. bplp where did you get that bear from?

Sophiathesnowfairy Sat 15-Jun-13 08:19:53

😜

Sophiathesnowfairy Sat 15-Jun-13 08:20:06

Not there then.

BigPigLittlePig Sat 15-Jun-13 08:22:36

<smug>

BigPigLittlePig Sat 15-Jun-13 08:23:06

[ bear ] without spaces...

StuntNun Sat 15-Jun-13 08:29:45

The bear doesn't show up on the MN app.

Passmethecrisps Sat 15-Jun-13 08:48:00

<steps over piles of soggy breadsticks, puddles of purée and enormous laundry piles>

S'up dudes?

Kyzordz Sat 15-Jun-13 13:31:53

Hai

izzybizzybuzzybees Sat 15-Jun-13 13:33:21

I finished the thread! Yay! Sad to admit but it but that was exciting!

itsnotyouitsMeals Sat 15-Jun-13 13:38:55

Yello.

itsnotyouitsMeals Sat 15-Jun-13 13:48:06

Izzy. Assume you don't want the Gaviscon now. Does anyone else want IG? Horsey? How did doctor go?

Kyzordz Sat 15-Jun-13 13:54:48

I still haven't ever finished one, must try harder

YellowWellies Sat 15-Jun-13 13:56:40

I'm thinking of getting a full biohazard chemical suit some cheap white baby grows from Tesco (the 3 for a fiver ones) to use for weaning so I can just bleach them in the washer or use them as dusters. This is not an age to waste money on nice outfits!!!!

In other news the bear is looking distinctly ginger... will he be one of the privileged few I wonder?!

BigPigLittlePig Sat 15-Jun-13 13:59:59

Kyz I offer F solids before a bf for breakfast. Other meals, she has solids an hour after a bottle. Seems to work for us for now Could E teach F and co. how to sleep?

Evil N seems to be sick an awful lot, would it be worth getting him checked over at the GPs? Is he being sick in the evenings because he's lying down, rather than toothpaste related?

Sorry there are still fellow sleep dodgers. Although part of me is a bit glad there are others. Most people I know in RL have babies who just sleep, wherever, when they're put down. I have to wrestle F, literally.

Det am very a little envy of your sleep.

Off out to MILs for tea. I asked dh to ask her what she was doing for me. Her reply? Boiled potatoes....um with what, please?! No, nothing. Just potatoes!

BigPigLittlePig Sat 15-Jun-13 14:01:17

YW not a bad idea that. F had chicken & sweet potato in her eyes, in her neck fat, and on the back of her head!? She loves to rub her food into the highchair, gets all sort of gooey eyed and trancelike grin

MadamGazelleIsMyMum Sat 15-Jun-13 14:08:52

Howdy, shiney new thread! Am just about recovered from my trip. Thursday night was savage - I gave u drinking at 3am but my boss went on until 5am. Work on Friday was a blur. Was delighted to see my monsters but they were a lot less fussed. DS celebrated my return by waking 7 times last night. Including an hour of singing and wanting to play at 3am. Finally he went to sleep at 4.15am. DD woke for the day at 5am. Thank god my mum is here, as DH is off at a hockey tournament. Going to do my best to catch up on quiche news.

itsnotyouitsMeals Sat 15-Jun-13 14:19:02

Anyone else's baby got full on separation anxiety? LO is def a mummy's girl compared to DD1 but she seems to have the real deal about 2-3 months too early.

LuisGarcia Sat 15-Jun-13 14:43:43

I would like to point out in my feeble defence that I was dancing because oops she did it again! 8-6

Although it seems I've stolen all your sleeps, so I'm sorry and I'll shut up about it now.

MissMummy1 Sat 15-Jun-13 15:02:36

After the excited squealer eventually crashed out at midnight, she was up again 5 times before 6am. Is this the 6 month regression?!

Belated birthday wishes kyz grin

And envy envy envy luis

YW I too felt a bit vommy on reading your co sleeping views. Yuckity yuck yuck!! And a ginger bear?! Fab.

I have been laying down the law a lot to 'd'p the last few days. I think my seriousness is filtering through... hmm

Brockle Sat 15-Jun-13 15:19:43

I am letting Y off with the last two nights of crap sleep as he is suddenly clapping, commando crawling backwards and called my dad "ganda" yesterday grin grin its like his brain is on overdrive. mine is not.

you deserve the sleep luis so revel in it smile

crawling back undercover now...

PetiteRaleuse Sat 15-Jun-13 16:45:00

We've had two or three wakeups a night since we have been in England. Hoping she will calm down again once she is in her own bed and not in the travel cot. Very short wake ups, nothing to write home about, but wake ups all the same. Hope it isn't the 8month regression. Or is the next one at 9months?

TheDetective Sat 15-Jun-13 16:58:18

I was going to post to say there isn't a 7 fucking month regression is there?!

O got all spirit level like on me before. He was clearly tired, but didn't want to be put down for his nap confused. Took 8 attempts at putting him down after self settling failed. Fuck! Don't start this shit again! grin

I thought the next one was 8 months <weeps dramatically>. I'll be moving out if that happens! I'm sure nothing can be worse than the 6 month one - surely?

O just refused a bottle in favour of grub. Greedy fecker.

For weaning, I generally strip O down to a vest with a bib. It depends what he's wearing. He's in a cheapy asda babygrow right now so I'm not too bothered about it. He is having green mush. So I've put a cover all bib on him, which seems to do the trick.

If he is having orange mush, he goes naked grin. Orange and banana stain everything and never come out!

PetiteRaleuse Sat 15-Jun-13 17:41:10

LO is 8months this week Detective smile

Heard from your son? How spooked is he? I drove past where he is staying the other day and shuddered grin

PetiteRaleuse Sat 15-Jun-13 17:43:21

Luis that's great re the two days a row sleep. You must feel like a new man.

LO has decided she prefers Ella's Kutchen stuff to anything else now. Better than Nestlé I suppose but how am I going to maintain an EK habit when we go back to France?

PetiteRaleuse Sat 15-Jun-13 18:18:02

Is vq ok?

TheDetective Sat 15-Jun-13 18:18:05

Not a peep PR but then again, I'd be surprised if I did. He's not got a phone with him grin.

I've found that O prefers puree that is made to recipe (ie. with correct quantities) rather than my random chucking things together, and hoping for the best. Oh well!

izzybizzybuzzybees Sat 15-Jun-13 18:36:29

I love how you're all wondering about regressions... We've never had sleep!

LuisGarcia Sat 15-Jun-13 18:53:15

sorry izzysad

YellowWellies Sat 15-Jun-13 19:01:18

Fingers crossed after dairy free you might get some sleep Izzy. Short of that - whisky? wink

MM lay down the law with a shovel and patio slabs on the fecker wink

Don't say 8 month regression - we're nearly 8 months. And sleep has been so good of late - sods law. Developmentally I wouldn't be surprised as he's changed so much this week - proper babbling with consonants and long earnest conversations with lingering eye contact and hilarious facial expressions at the cat kneeling up, bouncing like P and meerkatting at everything. He also decided Sainsbos trolleys are perfect for teething on.

We also seem to have really 'got' solids and nearly onto three huge meals a day. I love the Sainsbury's steamed veg packs (asparagus, sugar snap peas, butternut squash, courgette, broccoli, carrots, fine beans) five mins on the steamer and enough fresh, BLW size chunks of veg for the day - no faff, no washing up and 75p a meal is better value than baby pouches. He luffs them.
He also had his first taste of fish and chips last night blush and went bananas for it. I figure without dairy he needs the fat. blush blush blush blush ahem. DH is making Caribbean fish pie for tomo so we'll see what he thinks of coconut, allspice and lime juice smile

BigPigLittlePig Sat 15-Jun-13 19:03:41

I can count on one hand the number of times F has had a very good night (3). I can count on two hands the number of pretty good nights. Every other night is a variation on total dog shite. Still love her heaps and heaps though. Izzy I believe in order to regress, they have to have gressed in the first place.

Caught MIL about to pour milk into the eggs she was cooking for me. Gah!

Det F seems to manage to avoid her clothes, but spreads her food liberally about her person. She has just fallen asleep on me and I'm trying to pick bits of crusty sweet potato out of her eyelids and nose.

YellowWellies Sat 15-Jun-13 19:04:40

Oh and DH took him out this morning so I could start thinking about freelancing admin and he took a whole sippy cup of nutramigen mixed with 1/3 BM. We're getting there!

BigPigLittlePig Sat 15-Jun-13 19:06:11

YW that's how I justify giving F rich tea biscuits and sorbet

Forgot to say, have made her some "yoghurt" which she loves - oat milk heated through on the hob with a tbsp of corn flour, then rapidly cooled, mixed with fruit puree or vanilla extract. I quite like it too.

YellowWellies Sat 15-Jun-13 19:07:50

BPLP sounds like my MIL totally unable to handle the concept of dairy free cooking. Good luck! I ended up with a green leaf salad, no dressing and a boiled egg for tea last time I was there. Not fun when BF I could have eaten a limb envy

ChasingDaisy Sat 15-Jun-13 19:08:09

<slinks sheepishly out of hiding to mark place and share cute anecdote>

After O had his dinner today (first taste of chicken, broccoli, green beans and avocado) my dads dog licked his hands clean and he giggled like mad. He was properly beaming at the dog smile

Oh and I'm with you on regression talk izzy. I wish Oscar's sleep was so good that I could worry about it getting bad again.

<closes door quietly on way back out>

YellowWellies Sat 15-Jun-13 19:09:10

Woooooo good skills BP - do you cool it in the fridge?

YellowWellies Sat 15-Jun-13 19:10:42

<Grabs Chasing lovingly by scruff of neck and pops her into a comfy MN armchair >

BigPigLittlePig Sat 15-Jun-13 19:17:18

YW I poured it straight into tupperware container, popped lid on and stuck it at the back of the fridge. Made it on Thursday evening, and just finished today. 200mls of milk. You can use 200mls formula, but I figured I would use something tasty instead of making raw potato flavour yoghurt <boak>

Chasing well done - 12 hours is a long enough break in my book! Sounds like O is doing v well with his grub - and I bet the dog is loving the scraps.

TheDetective Sat 15-Jun-13 19:36:28

Dogs are fantastic baby entertainment systems grin.

BP Sounds good! Will try some for O.

Anyone know where I can get Oatly from? Can't get it in Morrisons, Sainsburys or Asda. Not tried Tesco - that's the last choice. hmm

Also YW where did you get the wot no dairy yoghurts from?!

YellowWellies Sat 15-Jun-13 19:56:12

Det we can get Oatly in Tescos, Morrison's, Asda and Sainsbos. Are you looking in the right place? Its usually in the baking aisle with the UHT milk and alpro UHT rather than in the fridges / dairy section.

I get Wot no dairy from our local health food shop, which rather fortuitously has a massive allergy / freaky eaters section. I've not seen it in a supermarket. Find a big health food shop?

YellowWellies Sat 15-Jun-13 19:57:40

We've decided to get a dog as a family Christmas present as I'm going to be WAH / SAHM / freelancing for the next half decade at least. Is this madness?

PetiteRaleuse Sat 15-Jun-13 20:04:27

No, not madness. Are you going to buy or get a rescue pup? Idea on the breed? Do you have experience with dogs? Do you have other pets?

My dog is having a great time here at my mum's. Just back from a walk/run on the shore. I miss the sea so much when at home.

TheDetective Sat 15-Jun-13 20:06:09

I've looked in both sections YW sad

I don't want to give him soya milk in cooking. And obv rice milk not suitable. So that leaves oat milk but I can't find it!

Will try and find a health food shop unlikely as i live in pie land! Thanks!

YellowWellies Sat 15-Jun-13 20:09:52

Det do an online shop or ask in store staff, even small Tesco locals up here have it so I'd be surprised if a big superstore didn't have it.

He's just fed to sleep in 20 mins. WTAF?! <Runs downstairs to have an evening!!!> Clearly tonight Jonas ate all the pies smile

YellowWellies Sat 15-Jun-13 20:14:37

Det I'd avoid soy for boys as it contains phytooestrogens which mess up the development of sex hormones. Also it may trigger CMPI. Koko coconut milk is pretty good for cereal just a bit watery for cooking.

PR we've both had lots of family experience of dogs, I had one in my 20s but no experience of dog + child + cat. We're thinking rescue dog ideally but temperament / history is obviously a big concern. I luff scruffy dogs with eyebrows - something like a border terrier would be my ideal.

Passmethecrisps Sat 15-Jun-13 20:17:33

Hia. Not madness yw. You walk such a lot you will wear a dog out. It'll be hard going but meh. I am a big fan of pets for children.

Sounds lovely chasing. I agree that pets are great baby entertainment.

We can get oatly in sainsbos and in holland and Barrett. I checked in both stirling's health food shops for Wot No Dairy and neither stocked it. When I get back to work I can pick them up there though.

The recipe for yoghurt is the same as one I saw in the nutramigen cook pamphlet I think. Must give it a go. I have discovered that p will eat from a spoon but only if what she is eating contains meat. Little carnivore. She was properly grabbing the spoon, sooking the stuff off then shoving it back at me it a sort of 'moar!' Fashion. Other than that she eats toast.

Not seen VQ on FB either. Are yeh there misses?

Lunch out was lovely. P was perfectly cutely baby like with lots of babbling and giggling and cooing. She cried for about 5 minutes because she was horrendously tired but she chilled in her car seat and seemed to have a second wind.

She is also leaping all over the place at the moment. Backwards crawling, mega sitting skills and almost permanent crawl practicing. She has got as far as rocking back and forward before bunny hopping forward a tiny amount. The momentum of the bunny hop causes her to collapse on the floor. She also does a sort of sideways plank thing which looks like she is trying to get to sitting from lying down. She once held her arms out for me to lift her but hasn't since. She keeps waking in the night in crawl position rocking back and forward but whimpering confusedly.

GTbaby Sat 15-Jun-13 20:24:39

I just spent 5 mins looming for you in anti natal section hmm

Lol

ValiumQueen Sat 15-Jun-13 20:26:25

Hi there, sorry for absence. Busy sorting a boy that now eats three times a day, and a birthday today for DD1. Had a few nasty flashbacks to the lead up to the birth ndcombined with PMT made for a grumpy VQ.

I missed the end of the last thread, but gather little miss Garcia slept? Wow and Yay!

Feeling sad as I should be meeting the lovely PR this weekend :-( but I know I made the right decision.

Oh, and I am a bit sore as I fell off a bench in MacDonalds whilst holding J. He was fine and DD2 did not take the opportunity to escape, so that was all I cared about. Apparently I made a noise resembling a constipated duck, and disappeared from view according to DH. Sadly everyone else had a good view. J did not make a noise and laughed afterwards, clearly wanting to do it again. It was a long table and sadly the benches were short. I just wriggled around to reach his bottle and started slipping into the gap, but could not stop myself due to J.

TheDetective Sat 15-Jun-13 20:44:23

VQ Sorry, but a little grin at constipated duck. Courtesy of DH hmm I presume?! At least you and J are fine though!

I get the flashbacks too. I understand. It makes you question yourself over and over too. It does get less - it has each year for me. This year (11) I finally stopped. I hope it won't reoccur next year.

YW We have a resuce golden hairyfucker lab. Well, she must be a cross with something, but we don't know what. She looks like a lab acts like a lab. She is perfect for O - her temperament is more human than dog hmm. She entertains O better than anything else in the world! I swear he loves her more than me!

We had a cat when we got her. It didn't go down well. Cat fucked off sadly. We ended up with a homeless kitten though (MIL found her on the street mid winter, and with a dead kitten next to her - unable to find owners). This worked out better. The kitten grew up with the dog, and both accepted each other very quickly, and easily. They would sleep in the same dog bed together! The kitten died while I was pregnant, after eating a lily. We said we won't get another cat while O is so young. We will when he is 12-18 months though. And we would get a kitten to make the dog/cat thing easier. It just didn't work for my grown up cat. She was too set in her ways. I know others it has worked for though.

TheDetective Sat 15-Jun-13 20:45:26

O did the same spirit level shit at bedtime.

Fuck.

We're in for a regression aren't we? He was fast asleep, but just wouldn't be put down. My boob hurts from the amount of grabbing and clinging on he did every time I tried putting him down.

MadamGazelleIsMyMum Sat 15-Jun-13 20:51:41

VQ ouch. Hope it was only your dignity which has been hurt.

luis saw your post on another thread about men who use MN. Of course you've been accepted!

Sleep regressions - DS has just been getting steadily more shit at night time recently, almost as if he knows that I am back to work and on need of sleep. Thank ker-ryst that DH will do the very early mornings otherwise I don't know how I would function.

BigPigLittlePig Sat 15-Jun-13 21:08:05

Det we've bought Oatly in Holland & Barrett, and Tesco.

I'm trying to ignore all you lot talking about the next sleep regression. No no no. Not in chateau pig. So far a better night, but ibuprofen has been dealt. Never given it to her before so sat next to her for ages afterwards to make sure she was ok.

VQ did you do a party in the end for dd? Hope she had a lovely day, constipated ducks and all grin

YW a dog sounds lovely. If we got one, with our cat, it would be the dog getting chased off.

Have just come across what I think is quite a good deal - £10 for a 30 minute family photoshoot with professional photographer, with 15 images on a CD at the end of it. We've been wanting to have a professional pic done for ages but couldn't afford it. Am quite excited, and no doubt dsd will be delighted with the prospect of glamming up for the morning.

MissMummy1 Sat 15-Jun-13 21:13:32

Hope you are okay vq xxx

I have been promised another dog for the last 3 fucking years at the start of next year too. I want a gundog. Gordon setter by choice but a lab/spaniel mix is more likely.

Manchild has realised how serious I am on realising I am viewing a flat tomorrow morning. He has asked me what I will do about going back to uni next year (sept 2014) to do my postgrad if I dare leave him - being told I would get a lot more support (and not just financial) without him dragging me down was a bit of a low blow answer even for me blush . Still he is trying and I am tolerating.

And I really want another dog. envy

PurplePidjin Sat 15-Jun-13 21:22:00

Is it still a regression when it's been going on for 2 months? R now takes 2 hours to settle for bed. He's tired and ready by the end of dinner, but too full to feed to sleep. Any attempt to get him to self settle results in hysteria and I'm happy to feed so long as it is feeding, not faffing. I'm exhausted to the point of tears, and we're off to the in laws tomorrow. SIL told the dn's we're coming, but they're with their dad till 5, so now i feel obliged to stay and see them. Which means travelling 7-9. Then 2 hours to settle R. 1st feed is usually 1:30. And i can barely see straight atm anyway. If she hadn't told them, we could have popped up for a few hours and snuck away when i was ready, but not seeing them will likely cause a meltdown for her so i feel i must stay angry i might just say we have to go and let her deal with it, is that really mean?

ChasingDaisy Sat 15-Jun-13 21:27:20

pidj would your in-laws understand if you told them what you have just told us? That you are completely exhausted and would need to leave earlier than 7?

BigPigLittlePig Sat 15-Jun-13 21:28:11

Pidj not selfish or mean - make your (totally valid) excuses and go. It also cannot be safe for either you or dh to be driving at that time of night when post-stroke/sleep deprived either (provided you are travelling by car). F has the same ishoos with feeding to sleep at the mo. She has a bath after tea, which distracts her for 30-40 minutes. Then we might get 5-10 minutes of rolling around the lounge floor. If she still can't feed, I put her in her cot with a dummy to chill her out, then try to feed her again. Failng all that, I rock her through the hysteria and eventually she flakes out. It's a bit shit, innit?

BigPigLittlePig Sat 15-Jun-13 21:28:52

<cackles> Good to see you chasing missed you [loser emoticon]

MissMummy1 Sat 15-Jun-13 21:32:19

Bedtime started 3 fucking hours ago. Fecking teeth angry

ChasingDaisy Sat 15-Jun-13 21:34:46

O has a tooth just under the surface now. He is dosed up on calpol and teething gel but I'm anticipating a bad one.

ChasingDaisy Sat 15-Jun-13 21:35:43

Hi-5 pig

I was feeling ever so lost and confused so decided to withdraw from the quiche. I now realise this was wrong.

Evilwater Sat 15-Jun-13 21:36:53

Had another good day. N was ok behaved, I'm guessing he's going to save all the bad behaviour for tomorrow at the Father's Day meal.

p is getting on my nerve, apparently he's got a cold. Well there is no snot, or a stuffy nose. He's just sneezing, grr...angry "cause I can't help with N cause I'm ill". angry the thing is he never really helps anyway. The worst of it, is his snoring!!!! It's so loud, I'm tempted to pop the pillow over his head.

Got my work trousers trousers today, £6 from tesco.

Now to catch up on the thread.
Evil

PurplePidjin Sat 15-Jun-13 21:38:48

Yes, but i cba to explain it. SIL surely knows, after 2 dc, that travelling with babies at that time of the evening is a complete pita? And not to fucking well promise stuff to her dc that i then have to deliver again ?! It doesn't help that i feel like they compare R to BILs ds who is a month older. Although I'm quite sure they make R sound perfect to them, and their ds sound perfect to us. I get really antsy if MILs on the phone and R is grotting though sad and i like my ILs, must be hell on earth to have shit ones!

daisychain76 Sat 15-Jun-13 22:01:18

So l start reading after trying to settle H for 2 hours and deciding to just let him sleep on me, only to find everyone else having the same problem. Sort of reassuring but so don‘t want it to be some wweird nearly~9~month regression.

Speaking of weird, some one l am friendly with (woulddn‘t say l know her well enogh to be a friend) has just texted asking if dh (who she has spoken to may be 4/5 times) will be her sons godfather (he is same agge as ds). We aren‘t sure what to say really.

Y sounds like he‘s doing brilliantly brockle, l couldn‘t manage up til 3 anymore madam. You must have a lot of energy!

Evilwater Sat 15-Jun-13 22:03:50

Sorry to read about all the teething problems, and the regression too.

Huge hugs and brew all around.
Evil

PetiteRaleuse Sat 15-Jun-13 22:12:59

vq I am trying to pack so much into this trip that meeting up with quiche members was, to be honest, an unrealistic hope, I now realise. The days are flying by, LO Is a little unsettled..

I'm fairly sure our paths will cross at some point anyway.

Sophiathesnowfairy Sat 15-Jun-13 22:21:24

Oh pants yw I completely forgt about the soy thing and in my no dairy experiment Ds1 has had 5 Yoghurt sized tubs of an Alpro soy custard thing ( he loves it with fruit) over the last two weeks. If I dn't give him anymore will I have still dAmaged him?

BigPigLittlePig Sat 15-Jun-13 22:37:47

Sophia he may not have an issue with soy - how has he been in himself since stopping dairy?

Chasing does this mean that F has beaten O to something for the first time!? So far she's been asleep, contentedly, for 3 hours. This is unheard of lately. Not sure if it's attributable to ibuprofen, or the fact that the 2 razor blades teeth have finally broken the surface.

PR hope you're continuing to enjoy your hols, rain and all!

kirrinIsland Sat 15-Jun-13 22:40:18

you're joking about the 8 month regression right?! I don't think I can cope with another regression. And we seem to be having a 2.5 year regression in this house at the moment.

ouch VQ Hope you're ok?

Pidj I think you should just explain to them. You have enough on your plate without having to people please at your own expense.

LuisGarcia Sat 15-Jun-13 23:18:50

Thank you, MadamGazelle

Elizadoesdolittle Sat 15-Jun-13 23:24:25

Had a really busy day. Not long got in from a BBQ (in the rain) which was fun but am shattered now. Just marking place and will catch up properly tomorrow. Night.

TheDetective Sun 16-Jun-13 00:23:28

Looks like regression. Feels like regression. Smells like regression.

Fuck fuck fuck.

YellowWellies Sun 16-Jun-13 00:25:10

Sophia only 40% CMPI babies have an issue with soy - he could be one of the 60%. Am hoping DS is - I could cope sans dairy if I could have a Chinese.

Just watched the last episode of the Fall on iPlayer. What a let down of an ending to an amazeballs series. Gutted!!!!!! I wanted them to catch the bastard!

Right bed. DH has sleep in for Fathers Day am hoping J got the memo and sleeps in til 9 again like Friday.....

TheDetective Sun 16-Jun-13 00:32:20

Co-sleeping was an epic fail. Figured we'd do it if he wouldn't be put down. Now all I have is a wide awake baby who is utterly amazed at his fortune and thinks this is the best game ever.

And I tool nytol 40 mins ago. Fuckety fuck eh?!

TheDetective Sun 16-Jun-13 01:11:15

He lasted 10 minutes back in the cot. DP now downstairs with him in the pram since he woke him up crashing around the house in the first place hmm.

He better wake up with a tooth or crawling forwards by the morning gaaaah.

Oh and I feel no guilt at leaving DP to it as he forgot to collect O's milk from the pharmacy today. And now has 2 bottles to last til 11am when it opens. Fucking idiot. He can deal with the fall out. hopefully will be okay as he shouldn't need a third til midday even if he has both tonight.

ChasingDaisy Sun 16-Jun-13 01:53:28

<closes ears to talk of regression>

There better be a tooth to show for this in the morning....

StuntNun Sun 16-Jun-13 03:02:11

But J is only just seven months, it's too early for another regression. This is the fourth night of shitty sleep in a row. hmm J is arching his back, frantically pumping his arms and generally rolling around in pain. DH is back for his second night and appears to think J is doing it on purpose to piss him off. Odd really seeing he wasn't the one so tired he couldn't stand up after swimming yesterday.

StuntNun Sun 16-Jun-13 03:10:29

Apparently J doesn't enjoy being held rigidly and shaken jiggled when he has a sore tummy. Dr DH says he doesn't give Calpol for abdominal pain. FFS if he'd let me give J the Calpol at the start then it might have kicked in by now. DH has taken J downstairs 'so at least one of us can have a good jight's s

StuntNun Sun 16-Jun-13 03:11:31

night's sleep'. Funny I don't sleep well when I can hear my baby crying downstairs and DH shouting at him. confused

StuntNun Sun 16-Jun-13 03:27:12

Baby rescued, Calpol administered and five minutes later either the pain has passed or the Calpol has worked.

Fucking narcissists, it's always about them. If the baby is crying he's a 'repellant little shit' that's doing it on purpose to keep HIM awake. Either that or HE's got to prove he's the best husband/dad in the world by 'taking him away from you so you can get some sleep'. Why can't it just.be about comforting your darling child who's in a lot of pain. I've had trapped wind and heartburn and they both hurt a lot. I used to get reflux as a child and the first time it happened to me when I was about 8 I thought I was having a heart attack and I was going to die, the pain was so intense. It's an awful thing for a little baby to cope with.

Poor J is going back to sleep now, propped up on my pillow with his dummy in. DH has stayed on the sofa good riddance.

StuntNun Sun 16-Jun-13 04:26:55

And he's awake again. J is desperate to beat last night's six wake ups.

YellowWellies Sun 16-Jun-13 04:57:18

sad oh crikey sorry Stunt

Sophia I misunderstood you about the soy. Am sure a few yoghurts haven't broken him - we were told soy milk shouldn't be his main milk and if giving soy snacks to do so no more than a couple of times a week.

first wake up.....

StuntNun Sun 16-Jun-13 05:00:58

Still awake here, he's just popped off - what a night! Probably be back in an hour.

PurplePidjin Sun 16-Jun-13 05:01:45

<<<hug>>> Stunt ffs what is it with denying babies pain relief?! If it hurts, treat it angry

R slept 9-1:30, 1:50-4:50. Best night in a long time. Hoping he goes back for another hour or two after this feed pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease

Must sneak down and sort dp's card blush

MadamGazelleIsMyMum Sun 16-Jun-13 05:24:39

Multiple wake ups again for no discernable reason. Day started at 4.45am. Fucking summer. brew for all the other tired parents - stunt especially.

StuntNun Sun 16-Jun-13 05:33:16

And he's awake again, crying inconsolably, arching his back. What's wrong with the poor wee lad? He missed one dose of Gaviscon yesterday, that shouldn't be enough to cause this sort of pain.

Sophiathesnowfairy Sun 16-Jun-13 06:03:47

bp I kept him off dairy because he had had a tummy bug and although to all intents and purposes he had recovered his nappies where still awful, loose and frequent over a month later. So I though a couple of weeks off dairy might give his tummy a chance to recover. He is back to one or two poos a day and they are not so loose though still sticky. S I think it has helped and I will give him another week then I will wean him slowly back onto dairy and see what happens. Although I do rice milk as milk as he is older and doesn't have so much milk and DS1 is soy intolerant and can't have cows milk so the only soy he has had had been these dessert things on occasion.

yw I have been loving the Fall as well, and was a bit disappointed but I think there's going to be another series.

stuntnun needs a massive fat quiche hug so (((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((hug))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

I don't know the answer my love but I am good with hugs. Xx

Sophiathesnowfairy Sun 16-Jun-13 06:04:45

I meant DD1 is soya intolerant, see, the more children you have they just morph into one!

Lily311 Sun 16-Jun-13 06:18:51

What a night... Nagh said.

Sorry stunt, yours sounds really bad.

StuntNun Sun 16-Jun-13 06:25:38

Thanks Sophia it was a rough night. I wish I knew what was wrong with him, he's had Calpol and teething gel, there's not a lot more I can do other than comfort him. But he's screaming and screaming. I just wish DH was some use but despite being away this week and getting a couple of full night's sleep in the hotel, he loses his temper so quickly. He holds J rigidly in his arms and kind of bobs up and down, it looks really unpleasant to be held like that. And then swearing and shouting at him? How's that going to help exactly? Then today is Father's Day so I have to get the house tidied up and make dinner as his parents are coming round and he'll want to pretend everything's normal and he's such a great dad. I swear if FIL starts criticising everything I say or MIL starts going on about what great parents her other children are (the ones with only one child and no special needs)... let's just say I will not be held responsible for the consequences. I got a row from them last week because my mum made them feel guilty about never helping us with the kids! Oh and a lecture on how great their granddaughter that was Gina Forded is. Yes because routines cure reflux, why didn't I think of that?

Sorry I thought I felt better but apparently I'm still in full on rant mode. It really helps getting it out on here though, I'll be able to suck it up and play nice later on.

My little bundle is all curled up in my lap fast asleep for now. I shouldn't complain, I've had an awful night but his had been much worse.

PetiteRaleuse Sun 16-Jun-13 06:58:14

stunt massive hugs to you.

Evilwater Sun 16-Jun-13 07:07:16

Morning all, I'm tired and put on the TV. Works wonders, ( bad mummy)
Evil

Sophiathesnowfairy Sun 16-Jun-13 07:27:21
YellowWellies Sun 16-Jun-13 07:30:22

(hugs) Stunt the not giving pain relief to babies is my bug bear. Maybe he needs more than gaviscon? or teething is making his reflux worse?

YellowWellies Sun 16-Jun-13 07:32:21

AUTUMN 2014 I CANT WAIT THAT LONG!!!!! <keels over>

MissMummy1 Sun 16-Jun-13 07:33:51

Big big hugs stunt - I would have killed the bugger in the middle of the night (your 'd'h, not J just to clarify)

M has managed to draw blood on dp. He fell asleep with her in his arms last night and she sucked his arm for near half an hour. There is a massive bruise and a tooth mark. And blood. confused

Sophiathesnowfairy Sun 16-Jun-13 07:37:29

You will have number two by then yw grin

Pikz Sun 16-Jun-13 07:52:34

Stunt massive massive hugs xxxx

Sophia I think YW will too!

Beef casserole in oven for small person and he's napping. Daddy still asleep enjoying his Father's Day lie in. I used to dread Father's Day as it reminded me I didn't have a dad but now I get to enjoy it for the first time in about 15 years!

TheDetective Sun 16-Jun-13 08:29:24

There are tears from everyone in the detective household sad

Every 15 minutes all night long. Til he woke for the day at 6. No. Fucking. Idea.

Help sad

It's just like last time with over 20 wake ups a night.

I'm never taking anything to help me sleep ever again.

Brockle Sun 16-Jun-13 08:45:01

is it teeth detective ? are his gums sore? ds2 was awful with his teeth. dreading it this time. can you go back to bed for a bit and swop with DP a bit later?

TheDetective Sun 16-Jun-13 08:54:09

No signs of teeth as far as I can tell.

Doubt it. He's in bed now. Got to get his milk fro chemist, pick DS up from school when they get back, and have a meal booked for fathers day. sad

TheDetective Sun 16-Jun-13 08:54:45

I mean DP is in bed. I'm about to try and get O down for a nap. hmm

BigPigLittlePig Sun 16-Jun-13 08:57:21

Oh gosh, shit sleeps all round by the sound of it (although luis optimistically quiet again) - brew for det, lily and chasing and an extra stron brew with extra espresso shots for stunt. Ibuprofen worked wonders last night, although may have been coincidence as both teeth have broken through. Stunt J sounds exactly like F was prior to teeth erupting, could it be that? Sorry to hear 'd'h was a nob.

Dsd highly excited by the prospect of fathers day, F more "meh" about the whole affair. Canadian breakfast (yum) and a lazy day ahead. F enjoyed smearing a pancake.

Has anyone got nice plans for the day?

ChasingDaisy Sun 16-Jun-13 09:15:33

Oh stunt massive massive hugs and brew. Poor little J as well. I'm so sorry your 'D'H is being such a nobber.

Same for Detective. Did he seem in pain? Or just wanting to play? Maybe something developmental

Up every couple of hours in the end but stayed in his cor until 5 which is good. I think it is teeth.

My fb feed is full of people dedicating statuses to their wonderful baby-daddies hmm

Off to meet XP in MK for fathers day today. We spoke last night and both agree that separating is for the best and that we want to try and keep things civil for O's sake.

fruitpastilles Sun 16-Jun-13 09:16:58

Poor you stunt and det sounds like you both had awful nights. brew To everyone else with shit nights too.
We don't have Father's Day plans, my cousins dd1 is making her first holy communion today and is having a party after so we are off to that.
detective S seems to be following O in the loving wires department! She has just rolled over to the settee, reached under and pulled dp's laptop wire out from under there and screamed when I took it off her!

Passmethecrisps Sun 16-Jun-13 09:27:49

det massive sympathy. Every single time I take kalms p is really unsettled and it just makes it so much harder.

stunt that sounds absolutely horrendous. Bad nights with babies in pain are awful with the most supportive person in the world but that kind of attitude is just terrible. I am with YW on the frustration at not giving pain relief. I just don't get it. I am not talking about dipping dummies in calpol nightly or giving it at every peep but if they are clearly uncomfortable then why not? If I have a sore head, toothache or a sore tummy then I take pain relief. If I don't take any then that is my decision. I think it is cruel to withhold medications personally.

Sounds good pikz

Kyzordz Sun 16-Jun-13 09:29:19

Morning all, happy Father's Day to all the deserving daddies out there! Don't have one worth writing home about myself but Eric has a good 'un and that's the important thing!

Happy birthday to dd1 for yesterday vq sounds like j has cottoned on quickly with solids! Good stuff smile am really pleased to read about so many babies getting the hang of it! Really wish mine would sad

det not another one?!? sad hope it passes soon! That sounds like a shitter of a night! Might he have eaten something that doesn't agree with him?

stunt sounds like an awful night! An awful row of them actually sad I don't understand why he couldn't have calpol. I don't get why you'd not want to help him if he's sore or at least try to. Not you personally obviously! Massive huge hugs, hope the pil keep comments to themselves today

brew madame and chasing and everyone else needing one!

chasing that sounds quite positive, hope today goes ok

I tried breakfast this morning before bottle and he just kept clamped shut :'( tried for 20 mins then gave up, and then he drained his bottle.

Not sure what else to do sad

YellowWellies Sun 16-Jun-13 09:48:58

Sophia I'd like to at least be updiffed with no.2 by autumn 2014 - I'd happily be preggers again now but only if I could afford a nanny to run the house / help with childcare! If I could plan it I'd go for a spring baby but I'm not sufficiently OCD to actually plan it. I will make sure I've got plenty of weeks leeway maternity allowance wise in case no. 2 shows up early as well.

Boo to all the shit nights sad sad sad just a thought if the pain looks to be reflux related sometimes calpol by coating the throat in a gacky liquid can make it worse - our paed mentioned it can give the stomach acid something to adhere to? I hope they are all teeth related and the crappy nights haven't been for nothing! xxx

StuntNun Sun 16-Jun-13 10:08:54

J is on ranitidine as well YW but he's still having a lot of pain. Tbh I'm not convinced the ranitidine does anything for him. Calpol does seem to help J but maybe it's different with him having silent reflux, the GP did say there weren't any signs of issues at the back of his throat.

I did have a random thought of violence towards DH MM blush. He was shouting why won't you go to sleep at J again a while ago. Honestly I don't know why he's in such a bad way about it, he's getting far more sleep than I am because J is almost exclusively breastfed. I think DH is making it worse for himself because J is hardly going to settle well under those conditions. He also thinks it's acceptable to leave J crying in his cot, he doesn't realise controlled crying is a technique you need to apply consistently with a certain method, he regards it as an excuse to dump J and run, saying he's tired he needs to learn to self-settle. Meanwhile J gets more and more hysterical.

Sorry to hear you had a bad night too Detective. Was O crying or just waking for no apparent reason?

Great to hear that Pikz.

There's one sharp little fang cutting through BigPig but it seems to be his tummy giving him trouble.

Elizadoesdolittle Sun 16-Jun-13 10:19:48

Yw I have the fall on sky plus but not got round to watching it yet. Might not bother now I know they don't catch the bastard smile

chasing good luck meeting xp. I hope for yours and more importantly o's sake he is able to keep things civil.

Huge hugs for those with god awful nights. Sounds like there were more than usual.

Not really got any special Father's Day plans. DH is playing golf so I'll just make a roast later. Will pop over to the in laws briefly. my own dad died a couple of years a go.

BigPigLittlePig Sun 16-Jun-13 10:39:30

Stunt I'm not trying to excuse dhs attitude (coz on the surface it is shit) but I know MrPig on occasion has shouted or got really frustrated at F when she won't settle, but it is purely out of frustration at the fact that her being unsettled means another shit night for me, iyswim. Teething makes reflux worse, doesn't it? Fs gums didn't seem to bother her that much, but the worsening reflux certainly did.

We caught the last episode of the fall, dh was seriously pissed off to find it was the last one! Imagine his face when I told him when the next series will bed!

Chasing civility definitely makes life easier. DH and his XP get on ok, and it means they are sometimes able to talk through big decisions rationally unless she's being a bitch

Need to sort out contraception now I'm not bf as much - the thought of being updiffed is a bit confused. I do think though, at least I've had a refluxey, non-napping, prem baby 1st time round - next time has to be easier right!?

StuntNun Sun 16-Jun-13 12:00:06

It's not really fair as you only hear my side of the story BigPig. I think because I'm spending all my time with J and also probably because I'm breastfeeding I'm much more in tune and responsive to him than DH. Also DH likes to be able to say here is the problem, I will fix it and all will be well. So this kind of unconsolable crying is much harder on him. Whereas I have the attitude that at least I might be able to make it a bit more bearable for J by comforting him, DH thinks if he comforts J and j doesn't stop crying then there's nothing he can do so he doesn't need to do anything IYSWIM. DH is being put through the mill at work atm, he's been travelling abroad almost every week lately which isn't much fun for him and means he isn't really getting time to actually do his work because it's all meetings and presentations. I'm hoping things will get easier at the end of the month as the kids finish school and there won't be so much pressure getting them ready in the morning, homework, trumpet and swimming lessons etc.

Lily311 Sun 16-Jun-13 14:00:24

I took my dad this morning to the swimming pool, it was nice. Left O with my mum. And now feeling sad that O can't treat her dad with anything. She has her dad's picture above her cot and also his favourite jumper and we say good night to him every night. Am just full of tears now, it's so not fair.

On the other hand, I got the last bits of furnitures for O's room so I might pop into the shop, get a bottle of wine and fix them once little madam is asleep. Although I fancy a run too. Hmmm.

kirrinIsland Sun 16-Jun-13 14:25:15

sounds like there were some shit nights being had last night brew to those that need them.

Bryzoan Sun 16-Jun-13 14:58:27

Hugs to everyone. Sounds like rotten times all round. Stunt- dh is like that about calpol. I just get on and give it now anyway if needed. We had a roughish night too but nothing like the rest of you.

Just popped in to give particularly big hugs to lily and chasing today.

And also to say happy father's day luis hope you are rested and having a good one but not dancing to britney, the thought of that makes my head hurt and as mrsg says it is bad for your knees.

ChasingDaisy Sun 16-Jun-13 15:22:03

Lily this must be one of the hardest days for you. For what its worth, I really admire you smile

Yes, Happy Fathers Day Luis! I am hoping that last nights absence means that L has finally cracked this sleeping lark.

Today was fine, met XP, all was civil, O was happy to see him. Apparently the ex in-laws are 'really fucked off with me'. Not with the man who is violent towards the mother of his child, but the mother removing said child from a violent situation hmm No lingering feelings there for XP so that is good.

LuisGarcia Sun 16-Jun-13 15:38:32

Yay for no lingering feelings!

Thank you all. Have had a sleep and am having steak and wine to celebrate. Sadly L is back to her old tricks, so no Britney today

Bryzoan Sun 16-Jun-13 16:13:32

Chasing - well we are all really quite fucked off with your ex inlaws too as it goes! Glad today went ok.

Luis - sorry about the sleep. Relieved about the Britney.

Sophiathesnowfairy Sun 16-Jun-13 17:30:04

Oh lily I just want to hug you. I hope your day ends on a good note.

We have had a lovely day. We had the boys Thanksgiving this morning, followed by Sunday lunch with my dad and his wife at a nearby pub. DH is snoring on the sofa after flying back from NI at ridiculous o'clock this morning to make sure he was back in time.

I am feeling a bit plump after lunch tbh grin

BigPigLittlePig Sun 16-Jun-13 18:17:45

Ladies who have previously bf - how long does it take for the agony engorged boobs to deflate? I feed F at 8am then not again until 6pm - by 2pm things are sore. Today it got to the point where I couldn't even cuddle her sad

Lily hugs xx
Chasing fuck 'em. Glad the meeting was uneventful
Sophia food porn, please?

Why is it that F will not fall asleep in her cot, but has just nodded off sat bolt upright whilst I typed the above?!

Sophiathesnowfairy Sun 16-Jun-13 18:40:19

bplp was your standard, but very well done roast beef and Yorkshire pudding with roast pots. I had rhubarb and ginger crumble for pud.

We are having tapas tonight confused as I thought it would be a light tea and would go nicely with a bottle of wine grin I refrained at lunch and thus feel justified.

Am pleased we are rapidly approaching wine o clock!

MadamGazelleIsMyMum Sun 16-Jun-13 18:43:34

lily hugs

luis happy Father's Day!

Well, it happened at 7 months. DS has discovered his penis. Last 2 nights at bath time, was mesmerised!

DH back from hockey tournament, pleasantly surprised by comparative lack of injuries and hangover, and he brought cash back too, despite a rinkside equipment shop. He might earn himself a v for such mature behaviour for a change.

Sophiathesnowfairy Sun 16-Jun-13 19:24:01

Ha ha madame ! I am constantly saying "hand" to DS1 as it goes down his trousers ALL the time he does it without thinking. Are all boys like this?

StuntNun Sun 16-Jun-13 19:25:22

BigPig in that case I would hand express a few drops just to relieve the pressure or you're putting yourself at risk of a blocked duct.

I have just had a lovely dinner of roast pork with crackling, Yorkshire pudding, roast tatties, broccoli trees, carrot and parsnip mash, apple sauce and gravy. Followed by gooey chocolate puddings with double cream. Heaven. Why am I telling you this? Because the diet starts tomorrow. I've never been on a diet before so I'm hoping I won't screw it up but I'm a stone heavier than before I got pregnant with J and two stone heavier than before I got pregnant with DS1. At the very least I'd like to get back into my pre-pregnancy clothes as they're languishing in the bottom of the wardrobe of no use to me at all. DH is dieting with me which will hopefully make it easier. He won't weigh himself the coward so he can't set a goal for weight loss but I suspect he's having similar wardrobe issues to me and needs to shed a few stone pounds to get back into his trousers. I'm really hoping to see a dramatic weight loss of a few pounds in the first couple of weeks then a steady decline of a pound every week or two. I have to be careful as I'm still breastfeeding so I need to make sure my calorie intake isn't too low. Also I suspect that breastfeeding is going to limit the amount of weight I can actually lose. But my weight has been pretty steady since J was 6 weeks old so there's no chance of the extra baby weight just disappearing on its own.

Lily311 Sun 16-Jun-13 19:25:25

Thanks for the hugs. I went out for a run followed by cherry cake so feeling better.

bplp I suffered a good 10 days. At times I cried as it was so painful. They deflated after 10 days but after 1.5 month they filled up again, I'm still bigger than my pre pregnancy size.

BigPigLittlePig Sun 16-Jun-13 19:44:08

Fuck. I'm back to work in 14 days. I need to take spare tops to work, don't I!? I had to hand express over the sink at MILs yesterday. I say hand express. I just stood there and let them pour like a bloody tap. Was really looking forward to feeding F, then she only wanted 5 minutes off one side before sleeping - nooo!

Madam grin lucky you!

Brockle Sun 16-Jun-13 19:51:50

in my experience sophia yes they are. I am constantly telling ds1 and 2 to get their hands out their trousers!

YellowWellies Sun 16-Jun-13 20:01:09

Jonas has discovered his bits too. hmm

He's just had a total over tired post bath meltdown after an afternoon of tooth grumping.

I managed to move 2 tonnes of topsoil today whilst DH had the bear. Was lush working in the sun but maaaaan I feel it now....

Counting down to wine o'clock and Dh cooked roast pork with crackling and a honey, rum and apple cake he's baked!

Happy father's day to Luis and all the Mummies who are also having to be Daddies xxxxx

Pikz Sun 16-Jun-13 20:06:30

Awwww LO just fell asleep going dadadadadadadadada

PennieLane Sun 16-Jun-13 20:22:33

I missed loads, no idea what's going on except the regression talk has scared me. The next isn't until 9 months, better not be early here!

I've bought cheap baby Gros until weaning is less messy, was making me sad to mess up nice clothes!

kirrinIsland Sun 16-Jun-13 21:11:05

bplp I was down to bf'ing once a day when i went back to work and for the first 2 days I got soooo sore I had to nip into the loos to hand express a bit. But it actually died down quite quick. After those 2 days it stopped being painful, although I still got pretty engorged. That lasted for about a week, and when i stopped bf'ing altogether I hardly noticed.

Happy Father's Day Luis

((hugs)) to Lily and yay for no lingering feeling for chasing

We've had a pretty good day. Nothing too exciting but everyone slept when they should and no toddler meltdowns grin

Now I'm just running round getting everything sorted for work tomorrow.

PetiteRaleuse Sun 16-Jun-13 21:13:47

gazelle how sweet you have witnessed the beginning of a life long love affair, that between a man and his penis grin

lily (((hugs)))

V tired. Feel like I am still recovering from the drive over here and it's only a few days til we do it all again on Thursday sad We have cancelled our zoo/Lakes/Gretna Green plans for the rest of the holiday and are not doing any more driving than 30 minutes away. It's too stressful.

Pikz Sun 16-Jun-13 21:14:13

Bp I dropped a feed every 4 days and it was painful but I used to express little bits in shower and when necessary. Probably took about a week after completely stopping the last feed for them not to be horrendous.

TheDetective Sun 16-Jun-13 21:18:24

Well, spirit level returned at bedtime tonight. hmm

He managed his morning nap self settling. confused

So what is going on O? Give me a clue, please?!

He is literally clinging on for dear life, and won't let go til he is well asleep. And even then... he's still grasping for me, and needs another 10 minutes of bum patting and white noise to keep him in the cot. I'd think it was separation anxiety, except he isn't like it in the day, and this morning he was fine at his nap.

I'm going to bed.

Donnadoon Sun 16-Jun-13 21:30:58

One of my boobs hurts I stopped b/f completely last Friday so 9 days ago and it still hurts ... Is this normal ?

ChasingDaisy Sun 16-Jun-13 21:43:50

Put O in his cot asleep at 7, but for almost an hour he has been screaming in pain. Completely inconsolable sad. Calpol and teething gel administered but no joy. Poor baby.

I am also fucking tired and it is only goibg to get worse as I no longer have anyone to share night shifts with me. I wish I had a baby that knew how to sleep. Keep wondering what I did wrong.

Had passport photos taken today and I look so awful. Haggered beyond belief. And my bunion is burning. Woe is me.

ChasingDaisy Sun 16-Jun-13 21:54:07

He's finally in a fitful sleep on me but every time I try to put him down he screams. No chance for me to even get ready for bed, let alone sleep.

FFS awake again.

BigPigLittlePig Sun 16-Jun-13 21:58:20

Chasing you can do it, I promise. DH has never done the night shift with F because of bf and her earlier bottle refusing ways. At least you no longer have to worry about being the perfect housewife, and can focus on relaxing and looking after yourself in the daytime. My mid-afternoon kip on the sofa with F is my daily lifesaver.

MissMummy1 Sun 16-Jun-13 21:59:14

I lay down for a snooze at 5pm after having a massive strop - I have just woken up hmm

Lots of hugs lily and chasing - I can't believe how hard today must be for you. thanks
Sophia do tell more about your tapas! I attempted to make it last night and got as far as chargrilled chicken in garlic butter, patatas bratas(sp?), olives, serano ham and crusty bread..... sweet popcorn and hula hoops blush

I also have a regressing teeth whinger. Although amazingly dp managed to put her down tonight first try.

WRT bfing pain I had none. Maybe a day of feeling a little full but no leakage and no pain. And we stopped almost immediately when M became a boob hater at 5 months after her first taste of formula. Maybe my supply had dropped?

Nice day here. Went for a walk along the canal and wound up in the climbing centre all afternoon. smile

ChasingDaisy Sun 16-Jun-13 22:07:17

I just put O down on the middle of the bed out of desperation and he has wriggled and squirmed his way to sleep. Now there is nowhere for me to sleep hmm Floor it will have to be.

BigPigLittlePig Sun 16-Jun-13 22:11:39

Untuck whatever blanket/sheet he is lying on and pull him to a more acceptable location on the bed chasing.

Off to bed now, contemplating whether or not to do df. Pros - I can empty my right boob and will therefore not wake up in a puddle; cons - she's still sound asleep might stay that way for the whole night?!

Good luck xx

ChasingDaisy Sun 16-Jun-13 22:17:35

Ooh tricky df dilemma. I am always loath to disturb a deeply sleeping baby, so I would probably skip it if it were me.

MissMummy1 Sun 16-Jun-13 22:22:29

Oh and dp got mistaken for David Tennant today. This is not the first time this has happened.... confused

Bryzoan Sun 16-Jun-13 22:23:51

Chasing - can you nudge him over? I'd be nervous of him on a bed by himself. Can he roll off?

I know it is tough by yourself with a bad sleeper. My dh doesn't do night's either - and hasn't looked after both kids together for more than about 20mins. He is lovely in other ways though not that that stops me seething when he has an hour long bath then settles down in front of the telly while I'm still scrabbling for 5 child free mins to do kid related paperwork.. You are so much better off doing nights by yourself than sharing them with someone who is violent and abusive. Really. Just remember no-one will throw your lentils in the bin ever again.

izzybizzybuzzybees Sun 16-Jun-13 22:36:25

I'm starting to feel there is no point in me posting anymore. I always say the same bloody thing!! Can you guess?!

J asleep upstairs after hardly feeding at all today.

I am now a member of the church where J will be christened next week :-)

We have a lovely outfit for him and just hope the shoes arrive on time to finish the outfit.

I have a lovely dress for me, NOT BF friendly at all so he will have EBM!!

GTbaby Sun 16-Jun-13 22:37:08

Shitty day with fucking stupid husband. He has been a shit all day. Basically stayed in bed in a mood. He has gone out for food now. I suspect he is sat in the pub sad

Sigh.

PurplePidjin Sun 16-Jun-13 22:39:56

I have a Philips manual and Medela electric pump. They're fab, the manual is quicker although more work for me. 10 minutes does 2-3oz, which goes on his cereal in the morning.

ILs was fine, they were gobsmacked at his eating, sitting and rolling abilities. Bathed him there - to the delight of both dn's - and clever vvvdp got him from car seat to cot without waking, all the way upstairs shock I've expressed 3oz and am about to snuggle down. Keep assuming R is going to wake up cold - he's wearing a long sleeved vest, jogging bottoms and cotton jumper and is covered by a flannelette sheet...

ChasingDaisy Sun 16-Jun-13 22:46:16

Don't worry Bry I'm about to try and manoeuvre him into a safe co-sleeping position.

Just been reading the Nigella Lawson news, those pictures are far too close to home for me.

ChasingDaisy Sun 16-Jun-13 22:47:28

Oh I luffs David Tennant.

YellowWellies Sun 16-Jun-13 23:02:33

Chasing it goes to show it can happen to the best of us and that the victim is not to blame. Saatchi - what a tosser sad PS glad to hear you had no lingering feelings.

MM I don't see him as David Tennant - he reminds me of someone (he has one of those familiar faces) but not the Doctor.... DT's too gentlemanly.

PurplePidjin Sun 16-Jun-13 23:02:50

Dammit, this boy can smell cuddles sad

Kyzordz Sun 16-Jun-13 23:07:54

Evening, not been about much, bought a new to us car and Eric ate some chicken as finger food smile and toast today too smile

Glad the meet went well chasing the x il's can go take a running jump! You haven't done anything wrong to make o not sleep, FC you do get some sleep tonight, sounds like you need some, hope o settles soon

Eric tugs his willy sometimes too madam, makes me laugh! Makes himself squeal sometimes

Good luck with the diet stunt I too am on one!

Thinking of you lily lots of hugs

Can they do the separation thing just at night det o sounds quite clever perhaps he knows night time is longer and doesn't want to be left so long?

Bless you izzy you must be so tired! Hope the shoes come on time smile

gt hugs, piss in his shoes

Anyway I should go to sleep, FC for good nights all round, pp hope sleepy dust reaches you

daisychain76 Sun 16-Jun-13 23:19:16

Just had to google Nigella. That‘s horrible.

Hugs lily, well done chasing. Hope the vhristening goes well izzy.

Very quiet day here. Poor dh had to work.

Gt is there no relatives or friends around who could talk some sense into dh?

Fx for good nights for stunt, izzy, det and everyone in need of sleep so, er. all of us then.

GTbaby Sun 16-Jun-13 23:52:19

Daisy During a recent drunk episode his sister happened to call. I tried to stop him answering the call. She got very angry at him and demanded to talk to me. I was very upset n told he he was very drunk. Couldn't walk straight. That I couldn't even put lo to bed as I didn't trust him to take him up n I couldn't (stil can't) carry him up the stairs. She ended up coming over with her hubby.
They have both subsequently spoken to him. That he needs to calm down and particularly at night ATM as I need to rely on him so much.
He isn't happy that I involved his sister. She has her own issues to deal with. N our problems are our own. I did point out HE answered the call to her despite me trying to stop him for this exact reason.

I digress. Ppl have spoken to him and its made no difference. His B n sil used to live here (before I married him) n I know they tried to speak to him about his drinking.

When he is in this stage of this drinking cycle there is no reasoning with him. Every few months he binge drinks for a few weeks. He doesn't see it as he has a problem cos he doesn't drink in the morning/afternoon. Or during work.

I don't think I mentioned earlier ( on phone so can't check back) he was drinking last night. And this am I was annoyed which triggered his moodiness all day.

Sry. I'm just off loading now.
Don't need this now sad lo has turned snotty n has a cough I don't have time to worry about FH as well.

Think calm thoughts. Need to get up for work in am.

izzybizzybuzzybees Sun 16-Jun-13 23:58:56

Oh dear gt it sounds like your having one he'll of a time with your husband. I'm not sure what to say as there's nothing that I can say that would help you I don't think. Hopefully now his sister knows this will mean he will reduce hos alcohol consumption. It's not good for him to be drinking like that at the best of times never mind when his wife is so incapacitated :-(

I'm heading to bed now. Better late than never. If the past few weeks is anything to go by I will get an hour til J wakes up :-(

GTbaby Mon 17-Jun-13 00:16:03

It's ok izz. Not much anyone can say. I know I complain a lot about him. But I keep most of it to myself as I just think, if I was reading this as an outsider I would be yelling LTB. but I know I'm not going to leave. So I guess what's the point in sharing all the shittyness and then not taking the advice that's offered.
Just have no one to talk to in rl and its got a bit much today.
Glad I'm going to work tomorrow actually need to get away from "this".

Going to go back to my semi lurking status now.

LuisGarcia Mon 17-Jun-13 00:31:41

GTbaby, Izzy, Chasing you have all said you're going to lurk because you don't "see the point in sharing the shittyness" or something similar.

We are all here for each other precisely to share the shittyness, because venting and advice can help and because being a parent to a bub can be lonely even with the best support in the world.

Reach out for every bit of support you can get, including us. Don't hide. Please. Even if we are not the support you reach for, you are not alone.

itsnotyouitsMeals Mon 17-Jun-13 01:02:06

Thinking of lily, chasing, gt, izzy, stunt, pidj, det and anyone else on need of support/hugs/sleep.

Night (hopefully).

PurplePidjin Mon 17-Jun-13 02:13:43

What Luis said. GT, have you been in touch with al-anon, they should be able to help you through with more specific advice?

3 hourly. Not as bad as it could be, means i probably have another feed to do yet though sad

izzybizzybuzzybees Mon 17-Jun-13 02:50:51

Thanks luis I just feel like I same the same thing every bloody day.

We're up now. Have fed and have unputdownable baby. Not sure how long to try for before giving up and bringing him into my bed. When he's in with us I sleep so badly as I'm scared to move!

Donnadoon Mon 17-Jun-13 05:49:47

Hugs GT Threaten to start drinking too? What would he say if you said that his behaviour was driving you to drink? I know you're preg and that ain't gonna happen ...sorry no help

kirrinIsland Mon 17-Jun-13 05:51:57

GT that sounds shit. Don't keep it all in - let it out here.

What a night. My 2 have tag teamed me all night. And N hasn't woken more than once for a few weeks now. Hope it's a fluke and not some sort of regression. I'm working today so no point in even trying to get back to bed now. Yawn......

MadamGazelleIsMyMum Mon 17-Jun-13 06:14:29

Not a bad night here by recent shite standards, and the 5.45am start is a fucking lie in compared to last few days. But only achieved by having DS in bed with me. And DH sleeping with DD. I never intended to be a co sleeping family. But it seems to be the only thing that works and as we both work FT, I think we'll just carry on to get some sleep.

GT hugs. I don't have any advice but you need to take any support you can get .

Izzy keep posting thanks

chasing my DH doesn't do nights either. He's so useless that even though he sleeps in the same bed as DD, she can wake crying and I have to wake him up from another room to deal with it. So is just easier to deal with DS on own.

brew for everyone. Best get up and go to work. Bloody DH has the day off - booked to recover from hockey. DC at nursery today, so he has a blissful day alone. Am envy but my sensible way to deal with this is to give him a load of chores.

Lily311 Mon 17-Jun-13 06:30:37

gt pls talk, we are here for you. Same with all of you with troubles. I often feel guilty of posting about how I feel but to be honest I'm most honest with all of you. No one even asked how I felt yest, I feel that a year on I'm supposed to be this fine, balanced woman who showed already that she could do it on her own and she will now stay strong forever. Not. A year on I'm still very much grieving for him, for O, for the life we supposed to have, for the unborn siblings, for my life back in the Uk. But! Compare to some of you my troubles are small as I know there is nothing I can do to change things, I have to accept them. chasing after seein the Nigella pictures, I can't even think what you went through but I'm so glad you are safe.

We had an ok night, she was up at midnight and was so thirsty, than at 4 but I just turned her back on her tummy. She has not figured out how to turn in her sleeping back, grrr.

We will be out early in the morning and late in the afternoon, predicted 35 degrees here.

LuisGarcia Mon 17-Jun-13 06:49:24

((lily))

Bryzoan Mon 17-Jun-13 07:01:09

Your troubles are the opposite of small Lilly. I really feel for you. You are doing brilliantly and should be so proud of that - but it is a shame that that means it is easier for those around you to forget how much you must be hurting. Big hugs.

Pikz Mon 17-Jun-13 07:15:51

(((((((Lilly))))))) you are awesome but it doesn't mean it doesn't hurt

Big hugs to izzy, chasing, luis, det, pp and anyone else up all night. I have been up on and off since 4.30am with a very snotty puking baby. Green rivers of snot.

Pikz Mon 17-Jun-13 07:16:36

And GT tell Hubby to grow some and man up!

ValiumQueen Mon 17-Jun-13 07:59:16

Lily I think you have been remarkably restrained in how much you have posted about your feelings. (((Hug)))

MadamGazelleIsMyMum Mon 17-Jun-13 08:21:49

lily I definitely feel guilty of assuming you're fine because you are so awesome, and guilty for whinging about DH when I am lucky to have him. Of course you are still grieving. The last thing you should feel is guilty about posting. I think that goes for everyone with ongoing woes <looking at chasing, izzy, gt and others> - I certainly dont feel like there is an "allowance" about what we can post about, nor a need to be cheerful all the time. We are here to support each other and that means listening when people need to rant, even if it is the same rant over and over.

Passmethecrisps Mon 17-Jun-13 08:48:08

Morning.

I've said it before - no one should apologise for posting on here. We go through a thread every few days for a very good reason. Every post adds something.

I am sorry that your RL people are being a bit thoughtless lilly. I have a friend who lost her fiancé and it was amazon how quickly people felt she should 'move on'.

Big hugs to chasing - I immediately thought of you when I saw those pics of Nigella.

Fuck sticks for bad nights.

I need some advice re day naps. I am, at this moment, being driven demented by a baby who seems not to know how to sleep. She still seems tired after an hour to an hour and a half from waking but I cannot get her to sleep. Basically, when we stopped swaddling at night she seemed to forget how to self-settle during the day. I started rocking her to sleep as a 'nap at any cost' strategy. Well, now she seems to have decided that being rocked to sleep as akin to being tortured and simply cries herself into a purple fury if I try to.

I put her down and she immediately starts to cry. Then be seems to have a second (and third and fourth) wind where she blabbers and rummages around. Every single time I go up she is in crawl position rocking back and forward.

This goes on and on until she gets completely hysterical.

I think she might now be asleep - that has been an hour after putting her down.

During this time I keep going in to put her dummy back in.

What are your thoughts? What should I be doing? In comparison to what others go through I know that tho is a drop in the ocean but bizarrely I find it really stressful. She is so difficult to get down during the day that if people come round I simply can't put her down to nap as I would be up and down the stairs so often. The result of this obviously I that she ends up brain melted with overtiredness.

ChasingDaisy Mon 17-Jun-13 08:53:35

Lily I often feel guilty about posting my issues because I feel that they are nothing in comparison to what you are going through. I guess all of this shows how aware we are of each others feelings and thus proves even more why we should keep posting.

It is no exaggeration to say that last night was the worst we have ever had. Poor poor boy was obviously in pain. He did a big poo this morning so not sure if it was tummy related. I am going to start giving him his dinner earlier now as I think eating too close to bedtime is stopping him sleep.

Passmethecrisps Mon 17-Jun-13 08:54:25

Sorry for the dreadful typos and autocorrects - blame Apple and a baby!

ChasingDaisy Mon 17-Jun-13 08:55:56

Somebody on my fb feed is moaning that her 12 week old still doesn't sleep through hmm Friends have commented saying how annoying it is that they are still up once, maybe twice a night with their 5 week olds hmm

BigPigLittlePig Mon 17-Jun-13 08:59:55

I don't condone violence chasing but sometimes I want to slap those people. 6 months! Nearly 7! And they think 5 weeks is bad? Pah, nothing compared to us 'ard nuts hmm

Pass you are a braver woman than I. We still have to rock F to sleep, but when she is overtired hysterical, she too goes purple. I have to pin her to me so she literally cannot move (akin to swaddling I suppose) and rock fast whilst she calms down. Is it wrong that I am hoping the childminder manages to find a way!?

Nappy change. WIll catch up soon.

ChasingDaisy Mon 17-Jun-13 09:00:04

She has decided to feed her 'jar food' as she is obviously super hungry.

<packs judgey pants away now>

izzybizzybuzzybees Mon 17-Jun-13 09:02:35

lily you have been through so much. Grief is a horrendous thing and I'm sure you do not just get over the loss of a partner. Maybe you learn to cope but never just get on with it. Take time to talk about how you're feeling. We are here.

pass I'm afraid I cannot advise on naps or anything sleep related in fact. J barely naps, a 13 minute nap was taken a few days ago! Twenty minutes is good for for him!

Well today is Monday and we have our paeds appointment today. Not til 2pm but I am really hoping for some help or advice or a bloody karaoke cure sourced from ukrainian unicorns blood or something! Argh!

Those with refluxy babies, silent or otherwise, do any of you have a reflux wedge? I was looking online and seems a 15 degree wedge helps? We do have books under the cot but the advice online implies this probably won't help as the height if the bed would need to be fifteen inches to get an angle of 15 degrees! It was all mathematical and does seem to make sense. Wondering if it'd be a worthwhile purchase?

Pikz Mon 17-Jun-13 09:05:17

Izzy if I find a Ukrainian unicorn I will send it to you!

Pass I have no advice as I have a fantastic night sleeper who thinks daytime naps are for the weak. We have to fight and fight whilst he gets hysterically tired

Passmethecrisps Mon 17-Jun-13 09:11:53

chasing I don't mean to be blunt but those people are morons. And I say this as the mum of a baby who did sleep through from very early. It is just they way the babies are and so young is certainly not the norm. The way society behaves though you would think that all babies sleep 12 hours from birth and if yours doesn't then they are broken. I love a bit of pant hoiking personally!

BP does F do the frantic back arching, pushing away from you, leg kicking? It honestly looks like she is in pain but I know that it is tiredness and frustration and 'do not want!' I ended up blubbing this morning as it went on and on and my parents are due to visit! I can't get on with anything or relax at all because I am always having to go in. I wanted to stop rocking her to sleep before I go back to work so the childminder doesn't have to but I was hoping to have a but longer to work on a strategy!

izzybizzybuzzybees Mon 17-Jun-13 09:17:33

Previous post was meant to say miracle cure not karaoke cure!

Oh and any advice on what to say to consultant today? I'm worried we will be fobbed off!

Passmethecrisps Mon 17-Jun-13 09:20:55

<rummages in drawers for Ukrainian karaoke unicorn>

No wedge izzy. When p was in a Moses basket we had the basket raised with a shoe box. Now she is in the cot I have put two pillows under the mattress - one very firm, thick one at the top then another thinner one next so it makes a steady incline rather than folding or bending the mattress. It is important that the baby is inclined fully and not bent as this can put pressure on their guts.

Passmethecrisps Mon 17-Jun-13 09:33:30

Have you kept a diary izzy? Try to go through the whole thing from the beginning.

Sleeping
Eating
Any observations re changes in behaviour after anything specific in your diet
Any other behaviour - Hiccuping? Vomiting? Back arching when eating? Changes in stools?

Don't let yourself be rushed and don't apologise for drawing your own conclusions. Just speak confidently and don't be afraid to ask for time to pull your thoughts together or ask for something to be explained if you don't understand.

You are a bright woman who works in the NHS - m comment makes it sound like you are a child. Sorry! I have been there and only now feel confident dealing with these appointments. One thing that used to throw me was when I would be asked about a 'key symptom' that P doesn't have -
For example blood in the stools. I used to get anxious as I knew why they were asking and I worried that the fact I was saying no meant that they would dismiss everything else. If this happens I have learned to respond confidently and not worry too much about conclusions.

Good luck!

BigPigLittlePig Mon 17-Jun-13 09:48:03

Yes izzy - what pass has said! We also use pillows, but definitely not as high as 15 degrees. She sleeps on her right hand side though, which also helps reflux, I believe.

Pass yes to all of those things. I have learnt to turn a blind eye to it, but this is one of the reasons dh hates putting her down for naps, because he feels like it is him hurting her, rather than her getting mightily pissed off because she's tired. After a few minutes of holding her so she can't move (in a friendly way - sounds hideous written down) she goes limp and the eyes roll. That sounds really bad confused but it's not! She sleeps then and wakes up again I promise!

Lily you are remarkable for coping with the past year. But don't feel bad for venting on here - we are all guilty of that!

Erm....I can't remember what I was going to say now.

brew to all who need them.

Madam don't blame you for co-sleeping. God knows what will happen when I go back to work.

GP appointment today, as Fs dribble rash on her chest wall has taken a nasty turn over the weekend. It's red, inflamed and the skin on top is peeling off. She's itching it all the time and drawing blood now.

BigPigLittlePig Mon 17-Jun-13 09:50:01

Oh yes, GT - I feel for you. Nothing sensible to suggest tbh, I just hope 'd'h can see sense before he does irreversible damage to himself and your family. I have looked after too many patients with chronic liver problems who have regretted their actions. Sadly it is only with hindsight that they have been able to see how silly they were at the time.

YellowWellies Mon 17-Jun-13 09:53:06

Izzy don't forget to mention the reflux noises, his comfort feeding, your observations on how he's reacted to dairy in your diet and his; his oral aversion to solids and how he's happiest during the day as he's upright. Oh and reiterate he isn't your first baby - you're not expecting him to sleep 12 hours a night but sleep measured in minutes not hours is crackers and exhausting you. Good luck - remember quietly confident and calmly assertive (ignore the fact it took me tears to get omeperazole!). Seriously though we've found the paed to be MUCH more helpful than GPs.

Chasing shock shock shock if I had read that my judgy pants would be hoiked so high I would be wearing them as earrings!!! 12 weeks! shock Fecktards!

Lily grief is such a slow burn weird weird process, it pops up on obvious anniversaries but also when least expected over the littlest prompting - over stuff you'd forgotten and half buried reminiscences. There's no rush just take it a day at a time. It's horrible how folks expect life to be back to normal just months after a death - they can't understand that normal has been irrevocably changed sad

StuntNun Mon 17-Jun-13 09:59:20

BigPig it is likely, and will irk you greatly, that the childminder will have no trouble at all with naptime. Ime babies behave really well for other people and save all the worst for their mummies and daddies. hmm

Pass not much clue as we're having major sleep issues here as well but it could be that it's too hard to sleep for babies in that 'almost mobile' state. Maybe once they get to the point where they can manoeuvre more easily then sleep becomes less of a problem.

Lily it's a shame some people don't seem to understand that you can be coping with being a single parent and still grieving at the same time. In time it will get easier in that you will be able to share the day with O and both spend time thinking of him. I'm sure she will love to see pictures of her daddy and hear about him from you. I know it's not the same but I never knew my granddad as he lived in Guyana until he died when I was 17 and I never had the chance to meet him. So the photos my mum has and the stories she tells of her childhood are all the more precious to me as that's the only way I'll ever know him.

YellowWellies Mon 17-Jun-13 10:01:02

Pass Jonas does all of that when overtired. Its horrible isn't it. If he won't sleep in the cot I tend to fight him into the pushchair and go for a walk. BF him into unconsciousness still works 50% of the time but I know I'm going to have to figure other ways too confused

GT he sounds like he really is a problem drinker who is drinking himself towards an early grave - what makes him drink - boredom, addiction, sadness?

Who has LO when you're at work? Please don't say DH!!!!

Oh and sorry if this sounds cheeky but please get yourself on the implant asap when baby 2 arrives - your DH doesn't sound capable of being a Daddy to 3 such young babies - he's not really doing a stellar job of being a Daddy to one sad I know you really want a girl but imagine him pissed, you exhausted and you trying to deal with 3 under 3 babies shock shock shock shock !

BigPigLittlePig Mon 17-Jun-13 10:03:35

<faints at thought of 3 under 3>

Sophiathesnowfairy Mon 17-Jun-13 10:28:08

Those nigella photos were really upsetting, it must have been going on for a while for it to happen in public.

gt that all sounds really rough. Your DH needs a bit of a reality check, I am pleased though that you now have some of the family on side. Xx

mm we had garlic mushrooms, patatas bravas with aioli,some calamari with chorizo, olives with feta (ok Greek I know) then I got some flatbreads and homous and the Tesco Simples Garnache which I think is quite nice for a cheaper wine. It was lovely. There is an m&s little book which is good and the mushroom and potatoes are easy but I bought the calamari. I love nibbles. We had a lovely evening.

Pikz Mon 17-Jun-13 10:44:09

Why did no one tell me how dirty my house is and why LO is suddenly scared of the Hoover?

StuntNun Mon 17-Jun-13 11:09:44

BigPig my grandma had ten under ten!

fruitpastilles Mon 17-Jun-13 11:09:50

pikz S is all of a sudden scared of it too, I must admit though, it's quite funny watching her face when I put it on, she goes all rigid and starts yelping, especially when it goes by her. I don't put it by her more than necessary for my own amusement honest [bad mummy emoticon]

Evilwater Mon 17-Jun-13 11:10:20

Sorry for not posting, I've had the runs all day yesterday, sad
Will post later,
Evil

fruitpastilles Mon 17-Jun-13 11:11:11

10 under 10!?!? stunt that's just madness! Although dp's mum had 7 under 10 and I thought that was bad enough!

Pikz Mon 17-Jun-13 11:15:54

Fruit I will admit to doing the same only to see if he touched it it would make him less scared!

BigPigLittlePig Mon 17-Jun-13 11:21:31

DH has given F a hoover phobia by accidentally hoovering up the hem of her dress, whilst she was in it. She physically shakes now when it gets switched on.

MadamGazelleIsMyMum Mon 17-Jun-13 11:30:36

10 under 10?

<faints>

Evilwater Mon 17-Jun-13 12:48:39

pass you'll be fine, just be assertive. I always say "I can't go on like this!" It usually works.
lilly you are awesome.
det and big hope you get sleep too.
luis glad you got some, and a nice meal too.

To any one I've missed thanks

Yesterday was crap, I had the runs, and P was an arse too. [Angry] N went to his MIL so that I could sleep, I got woken up at 2 ish cause N would stop crying. His nappy was very full! Poor lad he has a nice red bum cause of it angry and this from a woman who had 3 kids?! [Confused]I'm feeling better today, but still not 100%. I've managed to keep down some tea and rusk.smile

I had to cancel N first settling in session, sad
Evil

Pikz Mon 17-Jun-13 13:28:23

Wot I have learnt today:

Babies love days at home
Getting messy at meal times is ace
You barely have enough time to dettol between mealtimes
Banana is very difficult to get out of your hair
It's easier just to leave them in filthy pjs as they are happier
I am knackered from crawling on the floor
I've never seen my boy so happy

GTbaby Mon 17-Jun-13 13:50:53

Dona- tried threatening smoking last preg. He left a couple cigs n a lighter for me and went out.

Yw I don't have a clue why he drinks. He just doesn't know how to stop. There is no moderation.

BP. The potential liver damage and his health issues don't stop him. He has developed high blood pressure, colestrol and diabetes in last year. He ticks all the boxes for heart problems. He just shrugs it off and says its inherited.

Can you get private liver checks?

He is looking after lo today. Took him to gp. Lo has ear infection hmm I've been ignoring him scratching his ears as I thought it was a teething problem hmm feel like a bad mum

ChasingDaisy Mon 17-Jun-13 14:16:44

Stunt I think you have hit the nail on the head with the 'almost mobile' observation. I often hear O shuffling around his cot and night but then he moans because he can't get comfy. He knows what he wants but can't quite coordinate his body to achieve it.

Evilwater Mon 17-Jun-13 15:04:39

Great, now their is black worms in his poop. Do I go to the GP?
Evil

Evilwater Mon 17-Jun-13 15:26:18

Waiting for the drs to ring back. Gotta go and get stuff for the cat. Grr......

TheDetective Mon 17-Jun-13 15:40:22

Hoover adoration in detective household. My carpet has never been so clean grin. It's even better when he's on the floor and I hoover near him. He starts shaking with excitement. Crazy child. hmm

Sleep is still poor - but not like saturday night. Last night he woke twice before I went to bed. Then he woke just before 1, and I told DP to get up since he declined an early night, he can fuck off and get up then! and I was awake throughout the whole him trying to settle him, when I knew he wasn't going to go without a feed. 30 minutes later DP finally fed him hmm. Then he slept til 6, which is good. But he was up for the day then. He hasn't been like this since the last regression. sad

And because of the night before, I didn't take nytol, so it took me 2 hours to get to sleep, and another hour or so after O woke at 1. Just feel very fed up with the constant back and forth. I wish I understood why. If I could fall asleep straight away, or at least fairly quickly, it wouldn't seem so bad.

I think I got 1 hour, followed by 3 hours sleep. And that was for an early night. Awesome.

Naps are crap today too, with him fighting sleep, waking up several times. I've now bought him downstairs and resorted to the pushchair this afternoon. Everytime he woke he just seemed tired still.

Meh. I dunno. Sleep is for wimps, yeah? confused

Evilwater Mon 17-Jun-13 16:22:20

Now at the drs. FFs.

det I hope you have a better night

BigPigLittlePig Mon 17-Jun-13 16:28:01

Evil could the black bits be banana? have googled worms and nappy previously

fruitpastilles Mon 17-Jun-13 16:30:02

I am child free tonight, my mum is having S overnight for the first time. I'm off to see Rihanna with my cousins. Hope everything goes ok, I didn't think I'd feel so apprehensive about leaving her!

StuntNun Mon 17-Jun-13 16:36:02

J has had multiple green diarrhoea nappies today and is running a temperature of 38.5. Should I be concerned?

Elizadoesdolittle Mon 17-Jun-13 16:40:49

lily I think you're amazing. Bringing up a baby on your own is hard under any circumstances especially for someone grieving. I can't believe there is anyone who thinks you should be ready to move on yet. It must all feel so raw to you. Not the same circumstances at all but my Dad died unexpectantly when I was pregnant with DD1. She now sees pictures of him and I tell her all about him. She calls him dead grandad. Hmmmm. What I'm trying to say is that although no doubt it will be hard for you but it will be lovely to share your memories of him with O. Please don't worry about sounding off on here about how you feel, and that goes for anyone else who needs a moan or a boast about anything. That's what we are here for.

gt sounds like DH is really putting you through it. What an arse. I don't know what to say to help you I'm afraid. He needs to grow up and start looking after his family. Hope you at least get a break at work.

evil hope it goes ok at the drs.

DD1 is being an absolute horror today. Early night for her!

MsJupiterJones Mon 17-Jun-13 17:27:03

Hello quiche.

In need of some advice. My sister is 12wks pregnant (yay!) and has just received a letter saying her blood has come back as Rhesus negative. I guess she will have to have the anti-D injections etc. Was anyone on here in the same situation with their pregnancies? She is feeling a bit worried about it (and she's not a worrier like me) so really hoping for some reassurance.

Cheers.

p.s. Evil black worms in poo could well be banana as BP says.

StuntNun Mon 17-Jun-13 17:31:51

Afaik JJ it's no problems just a few injections required. The only additional worry is if she has a fall or her bump gets knocked then she may need an extra injection. Also there's no risk to the first pregnancy anyway, it's subsequent pregnancies where there is a possibility of a reaction.

Donnadoon Mon 17-Jun-13 17:38:17

GT Spend all his money til theres none left for booze...failing that I wont shout LTB I'll shout ITB <Ignore> and just concentrate on your babbas because he probably wont change until he wants to . Save your energy and your breath for now

Lily311 Mon 17-Jun-13 17:42:05

Yep, resus neg here. One injection at 28 weeks than second when O was tested at birth and found that she was positive. I got the second one when O was a day old. Both went into arm.

MsJupiterJones Mon 17-Jun-13 17:49:59

Thank you, that's really helpful. Just want to be able to say to her I know someone who had it and it was all fine... Hopefully it will make her feel better.

Sorry I haven't been around much, work has been all-consuming. Even had to go in yesterday due to technical crisis. Much harder to keep up now but I'm trying. Was thinking of you all yesterday especially those for whom it was a poignant or painful day. thanks

ValiumQueen Mon 17-Jun-13 18:08:52

Evil, threadworms are white, look like thread, and wave at you. Black ones are banana.

Stunt hope LO is soon better x

GT the alcohol treatment service will only work with your DH if he wants to stop. I encourage you to google family support for drinkers and they can give you advice and support about living with a drinker. It sounds like he just doesn't care.

ValiumQueen Mon 17-Jun-13 18:11:29

Oh yes, and DD1 has not yet had a party. Her class have the pox so just as well really. Will do something in a couple of weeks. She is loving her roller skates.

ChasingDaisy Mon 17-Jun-13 18:49:41

AIBU to be annoyed at my wicked stepmother for tutting, saying Oi, and telling him to stop moaning whenever O cries hmm Earlier she told him to stop whinging as there was nothing wrong. He was hungry. Also, that a toy of O's which has been chewed by a Labrador requires more than a cursory rinse under the tap?

O ate salmon for the first time today and loved it. I fed him the flakes with my fingers and he gobbled it up. Productive day today, with income support and housing applications completed.

TheDetective Mon 17-Jun-13 19:06:34

She'd hate living with sir whingealot here then chasing. Not unreasonable at all. smile

I don't worry too much about dog/toys/etc. But only because O chews the dog at every available opportunity.... and they lick each other. I've given up caring because O adores the hairball...

I have been shown a picture of DS from his residential trip this weekend. He let the girls put make up on him... and the boys painted his nails.

Mr. Confident is in for a shock in september when he knows no one, and Grandma isn't there to protect him. grin

BigPigLittlePig Mon 17-Jun-13 19:33:07

Chasing she could borrow F for the day and night if she likes? Today, she has perfected the high-pitched, indignant, 10 billion decibel screech. It's an ear splitter. It also serves no purpose. The cat/toy/highchair/food/daddy have all been screeched at. We are similarly gung-ho about toys though tbh. As long as there's no visible hair or fluff, it's straight back in the mouth <boak>

VQ glad dd enjoyed her birthday - I have very fond memories of roller skating and then blading. Lots of fun.

JJ congrats to your sister smile

Fruit enjoy Rihanna! And being childfree!

So tonight, F wolfed down her purees, then was busy screeching at me as I ate pear crumble. So I popped a really quite large piece of (cooked but firm) pear in her mouth. She looked like this shock then chewed, swallowed, and opened & eeped for more. And more. And then some more! DH was quietly having a coronary convinced she was about to choke at any minute, but nope, she loved it. Shame the love doesn't extend to savoury stuff but hey ho.

ChasingDaisy Mon 17-Jun-13 19:42:50

pig whenever O tries food he pulls a disgusted face whether he likes it or not. With pear, he beamed smile

I'll lighten up on toy hygiene then I think.

MissMummy1 Mon 17-Jun-13 19:46:17

Today Bdog took M's carrot toy and replaced it with the disgusting lobster he loves more than life itself. envy < not jealous

BigPigLittlePig Mon 17-Jun-13 19:56:05

MM that's made me chuckle!

GTbaby Mon 17-Jun-13 19:59:30

VQ. Yes i Agree. It wont work unless he wants it to. Thank you. Will look into support though.

Dona I am doing the ignore tactic now
considered the money thing. But I know he has two credit cards if he really wanted to use those he could.

Evil has dr called? Is lo ok generally.

JJ my sil has those injections. She's just had her 3rd baby and all been ok and she has sailed through pregnancy.

Fruit. Have fun. I got offered tickets for Saturday. Wish I'd gone.

Det your mr confident sounds lovely grin bit of a heart breaker as he already knows how to get the girls attention. Lol

PurplePidjin Mon 17-Jun-13 20:01:44

<<<hug>>> lilly

Chasing, i would judge. Ffs, mum knows best doesn't apply to basic biology and child development!

R ate a weetabix with pear for breakfast then was still hungry so had some scrambled egg. He ate a pouch (90g) for lunch (was out) then a baby yoghurt (50g) then had a go at my mum's crusts and some cucumber. For dinner he had chicken curry with basmati rice, then yoghurt with mango (ate about half a bowl). He went straight down at 6:45 and is still there shock what happened to my 2 hour battles?! I predict 1st wake up around 11 and 2 hourly thereafter hmm

Evilwater Mon 17-Jun-13 20:05:53

Just looked at the thread, doh, blush he did have banana [banana] thanks BP

It's great to hear you've had a productive day chasing
Evil

Lily311 Mon 17-Jun-13 20:10:07

Thanks all.

O is super sweaty. It's 35 degrees outside and 26 inside. Went to sleep with a nappy and a thin sleeping bag on, fan switched on; my brother is sending me one of those Adan and anais one tmrw for the summer. Thank you for recommending it, not sure who put it here. If anyone interested it's £15 on amazon now. I'm a bit vary letting her sleep in a nappy only, however hot is here I always have a thin blanket on me.

Can you give salmon at this age? I know cod/haddock is fine but not sure about salmon. O had peach and cherries today, she loved them.

One of my friends just asked me if she could come and see us on Thursday, she is flying from London en route to Warsaw. I feel blessed for having great friends, just what I need now. My mum offered to have O overnight but I'm not sure I want a night off just yet, I need her to see me first thing she wakes up. I might just book a babysitter and we go and have a drink next to the river.

ChasingDaisy Mon 17-Jun-13 20:19:24

I gave salmon today. I hope it is ok confused

Pikz Mon 17-Jun-13 20:20:41

'twas me lily, I have just ordered a 2nd as they are so good and LO appears a lot better in them.

Am knackered, gym and baby in one day hard work!

GTbaby Mon 17-Jun-13 20:21:30

Brill eatting PP! So it rice ok for lo? As I'm going to try that soon. Did you use a lot of curry to make rice wet/ kinda soup ish? Or give the rice quite dry?

Hope lo gets his appetite back soon. I have a fridge full of cubes I want to use up half before trying new things.

GTbaby Mon 17-Jun-13 20:26:08

Lily would you consider leaving lo with your mum. And you stay there the night. The first night my sister had lo for the night I slept next door, just in case. Made me feel a lot better when I left him alone next time.
This way you get a break get to enjoy your night but no worry about lo over night?

PurplePidjin Mon 17-Jun-13 20:37:33

He has baby rice with it normally - i figure it's the same stuff just lumpy! He had rice and peas (aduki beans) fork mashed with cooked milk at SIL's yesterday and loved it so figured i could ditch the baby stuff grin he also likes the heinz pasta stars although doesn't like the bigger AK shells much.

The curry was a MN recipe, i made loads and we had 4 portions in chunks, R got 6 pureed. I thinned it with a tbsp or so of bm because of the water lost in defrosting, then added 1/2 tbsp well cooked rice. He ate over three quarters, then a tbsp or so of yoghurt/fruit

Lily311 Mon 17-Jun-13 20:44:59

Thanks pikz, can't wait till I get it.

YellowWellies Mon 17-Jun-13 20:46:41

I've given tinned salmon too - its one of the best ways to get calcium into a dairy free baby. Jonas adores it - and gets disappointed when I open a tin that isn't salmon!

Thanks for raising the black worms issue - given our love of bananas its only a matter of time til we see them and I'd have had chickens!

Today we had an underwater photo shoot at swim class. Afterwards I decided it was a good idea to buy half a shrubbery in B&Q and then transport it home in the pushchair on the train blush.

Oh and the bear whilst assuming the crawl pose finally managed to lift his ass off the ground today and wriggled backwards. He also finally rolled back to front - given he rolled front to back at 12 weeks its taken him some time! So a big day! smile

PennieLane Mon 17-Jun-13 20:53:06

LO has had salmon and rice, both go down well. Rice that's slightly 'wet' is good as you can mush it into a ball that they can pick up and eat.

BPLP how's the stopping feeding to sleep going?! It's our first night here. DH muddled through and took 30 mins to put her down. Lets see how tonight goes confused

TheDetective Mon 17-Jun-13 20:59:38

O went out like a light tonight. Please keep it that way. And he went down at 7.30 so I get a bit of evening, and an early fingers fucking crossed night.

Thank you MrIbuprofen.

I can't work it out - but he just doesn't seem himself. I'm wondering if he is just a slow teether grin.

MadamGazelleIsMyMum Mon 17-Jun-13 21:00:09

Interesting about salmon and rice. DS had a lentil/cabbage combo that DH put together so I wasn't altogether surprised when DS launched himself at the Thai green curry we had for supper. I spent this evening making DS mac cheese with leek and onion and a mango/apple/custard dessert. 6 pots of each, hope he likes it. Was delighted when out the other day and tried a jar - DS was having none of it!

in other news I have just had a superb row with not-so-D-H. Nothing spectacular, just the same old shit. I loathe repeating myself and yet I have to say the same shit all the fucking time

Pikz Mon 17-Jun-13 21:04:29

Oh and chasing not unreasonable... I can lend her L he moans every second he does not get exactly what he wants... Be it the remote, iPad, hot tea, his high chair at the right angle...

Det I have no advice... Capol it is!

Madam hope your ok.

Salmon sounds good... May have to get some

And well done mini yellow bear.

BigPigLittlePig Mon 17-Jun-13 21:09:35

Ooh thanks yw for the calcium tip - salmon duly added to this weeks shopping list. It's obviously helping J, what with all the rolling and crawling shizzle.

Pennie she feeds to sleep at night probably half to a third of the time, which is fine, and the rest of the time I rock her to sleep or she nods off somewhere inappropriate - still not a chance of self settling, but at least the feeding/sleep association is waning. 30 minutes doesn't seem too bad though?

Sophiathesnowfairy Mon 17-Jun-13 21:23:27

Mmmm salmon.

Just had a toasted muffin. With honey. And a nice cup of tea.

YellowWellies Mon 17-Jun-13 21:24:52

Pennie I was going to say 30 mins is bloody good. It takes us 40+ mins every night of cuddles and BF to get him to sleep. Mindst I do sit and MN whilst feeding him down. Probably could get him down quicker if I rocked him but I'm a bit too lazy on an evening....

PurplePidjin Mon 17-Jun-13 21:25:19

For the dairy free crew, would coconut milk be any good in cooking? It's used a lot in the Caribbean - i need to find the solid stuff somewhere and make sweet potato pudding, yum which R likes too whoops - bet it would make awesome porridge!

TheDetective Mon 17-Jun-13 21:36:49

I'm going to make you all jealous of what I just had. A muffin. Made from Smash. A Smuffin.

Boak right? Well, it had caburys caramel highlights in it. So it wasn't too bad. Need to get my kicks where I can these days grin.

Not sure Pidj I've never looked in to it!

izzybizzybuzzybees Mon 17-Jun-13 21:54:33

Well j had paeds today. Went well. Consultant was lovely. J had some skin prick allergy testing and is allergic to milk, eggs and peanuts. More tests will be done later. He is being referred to dietician and community childcare nurses will come and help re weaning. We have a tub of neocate to try as we need an option for when I go in for surgery. DH currently attempting this just now....very unsuccessfully! We had two options to try. Me going dairy free first and then upping ranitidine if no better or vice versa. I've decided since he's clearly allergic to dairy that me cutting it is the best course of action rather than upping the dose. If neither works then omeprazole is next. We have the nurses arranging to come out next week and they will liaise with consultant and follow up with consultant in October.

Busy day!

PennieLane Mon 17-Jun-13 21:58:27

You're right, 30 mins not too bad, the confused was actually for the night ahead as she'll get into a frenzy if she wakes and can't feed to sleep. We're in bed already and waiting nervously! She is in her pram suit as she associates sleep with that but now it's a bloody hot night!

That's great that the association is waning BPLP.

Salmon risotto is good for LOs-one leek, baby stock, salmon and risotto rice. Goes down a treat!

MissMummy1 Mon 17-Jun-13 22:20:21

DP is having his first night out since having M tonight. Him and our male neighbours either side have gone to the village pub hmm . One of the wives is due any day and the other guy has to do the school run tomorrow. Rock and roll, eh?

I am sorting through M's baby clothes and moping. More going in the keep pile than the ebay pile blush

YW how was the photoshoot? I have a friend who is an underwater photographer who is keen to do M's for me. I also want an underwater housing for my camera.... I couldnt quite believe the prices wb were charging for prints shock shock

StuntNun Mon 17-Jun-13 22:20:44

Glad you got some answers Izzy. I stopped eating soft cooked eggs (boiled/poached/fried) but I'm still eating things with egg in such as breaded fish, cake etc. After a couple of weeks J's skin has gone all lovely and soft instead of dry and scaly. So I think the egg was bothering him.

Sooo hoping for a better night tonight after five hellish ones otherwise he's going up for adoption tomorrow. His temperature is back down so FC it was just a tummy bug.

Elizadoesdolittle Mon 17-Jun-13 22:23:11

Just read the thread in most active about children on flights. Big mistake. I'm getting really nervous about the flight on Wednesday now, especially as DD1 has been an absolute tantrum queen the past couple of days and is a complete fidget arse at the best if times. I have episodes of peppa pig/disney film downloaded, crayons/stickers etc but I just don't hink this is going to keep her amused for 4 1/2 hours. Hopefully the adreniline of being on a plane will carry her through. And I haven't really thought about how it's going to be having E pinned to me for that long. Hoping that I can just shove a boob in her mouth whenever she gets upset. Hmmmm. I am looking forward to my holiday though honestly grin

kirrinIsland Mon 17-Jun-13 22:24:16

lily your troubles are in no way small. I appreciate that you can do nothing to change your situation but that doesn't make it easier to deal with. I lost my Mum 18 months ago and I found it harder after a year than when it first happened - after the shock has worn off and you're realising what forever means. And like you say, everyone else has moved on by then. I cannot imagine how you must be feeling - you do come across as a very strong person. ((hugs))

pass I still rock N to sleep, and she too seems to have decided she's not so keen anymore but won't self settle either. She also seems to need to claw my face and neck to pieces whilst drifting off! Putting her down to sleep has been a doddle for a while but now we seem to be going backwards. Last night we were back to taking 5 or 6 goes to get her back to sleep in her cot after waking - Hopefully a one off bad night and not a regression <optimist emoticon>
Just when you think you've cracked something they prove you wrong!

Glad it went well izzy Must take a while to get your head around what he can and can't have and how best to manage it but at least you have some answers now.

wishing you all a good night smile

MsJupiterJones Mon 17-Jun-13 22:27:02

Ooh we had salmon tonight too! I didn't know it was good for calcium.

I'd really like a simple guide to nutrition and what foods are good sources of which vitamins, minerals, protein etc so I can make sure we are getting a well rounded diet. If anyone has a recommendation please share.

That's tough news Izzy, hope the Neocate works out.

Det that sounds revolting! Was it really nice?

I think coconut milk is fine Pidj, one of the popular dairy substitute milks is Koko which is made from coconuts.

PetiteRaleuse Mon 17-Jun-13 22:28:03

I have put on a ridiculous amount of weight the last week and I still have three more days of Englush food to scoff. Not forgetting the stuff I'm taking home smile

Discovered Matalan and Dunelm Mill (sp?) today. Wow. Good job there is a limit in my in car space.

Elizadoesdolittle Mon 17-Jun-13 22:30:30

stunt Hope you have a better night. It sounds like it would take some going to have a worse one than last night!

PetiteRaleuse Mon 17-Jun-13 22:31:36

I don't have the book here but there is a great AK salmon recipe which dd1 loved.

LO has cracked weaning, but I discovered today that trifle is too rich for her. Custard vom, yum grin

Night all.

GTbaby Mon 17-Jun-13 22:34:23

I can't remember what AK is blush

GTbaby Mon 17-Jun-13 22:35:16

Annaba Karmel. Will head to library to pick up book

YellowWellies Mon 17-Jun-13 22:38:05

MM it was really good. The photography team were amazing at capturing lots of images per 5 - 10 second underwater swim and pulling themselves out of shot super quick without disturbing water or baby for the shot - so quite a faff! He did 4 swims with no upset despite total nap avoidance. They also had a neutral backdrop and lighting rigs - so I'm not sure how a homemade version would compare. The prices are daft but the in laws are paying as a father's day pressie for DH. £60 per pic is crazy. Ads has an underwater camera and housing (I think) if you want to borrow it?

Oh I meant to say the downside of salmon is that it makes your baby smell rank!

TheDetective Mon 17-Jun-13 22:40:00

Annabel Karmel or whatever her name is GT!

JJ It filled a massive cake shaped hole in my life, by about 1/10th lol! I'd do them again, but I'd rather have cake, thanks!!

PR envy. Tut. I want foods. Good foods. Yummy foods. WAAAAAAH!

I have a confession to make. I can't give O fish. I just can't do it. I have a fish phobia. I'd not only not be able to cook it, or give it to him. I'd not be able to hold him, cuddle him, kiss him, without being affected. I'm that bad. I just can't. Couldn't with DS1. He doesn't like fish now, after trying some when he was older. Assume it is my fault. And I feel bad. But I just can't do it. Mental block. Even DP doesn't eat it because I won't come near him for a long time after. blush blush blush Sounds so childish. But I've been this way as long as I can remember. And worse from the time my mums ex husband forced salmon in my mouth. I ran away from home after that, when I was 11.

TheDetective Mon 17-Jun-13 22:43:10

Kirrin You just described our recent nights to a tee. Down to the scratching, pulling, hitting, and general fuss making and arching. Then when you think you have finally got him to sleep, and lower to the cot, round 2/3/4/5/6/7/8/100 starts all over again.

He only learned to fucking self settle properly 3 bastarding weeks ago. FFS!

Passmethecrisps Mon 17-Jun-13 22:44:58

Hola wimmens and mans.

pikz I loved your post earlier about L never being happier. Awesome, awesome, awesome.

Hi 5 to yellowbear. Good job wee man. Good job.

Any word from izzy? Saw on Facebook that things were pretty busy with the paed. Would be good to hear the full story.

We had a lovely day in the end after my blubbing about napping. I spoke to our new childminder on the phone and ended up spilling all my anxieties about sleep and feeding. She was very relaxed but also really reassuring about it all. She advise just leaving P a bit longer between naps and seeing how she coped. Well, I did this and after a tense wee while after my parents arrived where I was clock watching and thinking she must need a nap P just rallied and did really well.

<massive pizza interlude>

Ok.

I just took a 1.5 hour break in the middle of posting. Anything could have happened!!

izzybizzybuzzybees Mon 17-Jun-13 22:46:26

I posted a shortish version pass! You mistake missed it!

izzybizzybuzzybees Mon 17-Jun-13 22:46:55

Must have not mistake missed it!

Kyzordz Mon 17-Jun-13 22:49:08

gt sounds like you're having no fun at all! Fh sounds like he's being a real knobber!! Hugs

lily please feel free to vent on here whenever you need to, huge hugs, I can't begin to imagine what you're going through

No advice for day naps pass but hope you get them sorted soon. With e he is awake longer now he's older and usually does 2.5-3 hours now and then has a nap and if I try to put him down too awake like we have trouble. Perhaps if you try to keep her awake a tiny bit more and see what happens?

izzy my mum has reflux wedges for elyza and they seem to help her smile

Hope you feel better soon evil

jj the ak book is good and so are the blw books. I have lots of books and still don't know what I'm doing and they do have stuff about nutrition, the ak one looks pretty good, I think I need to have another read through

chasing not unreasonable, babies cry! Was she saying it in jest? Glad o liked salmon! E liked cod but not salmon, or perhaps it's the tomato based sauce it was in... Who knows?! I could try a different one I guess, or I froze four portions of that so I could try once every so often and see.

bplp e likes pear too, I've never given it other than a wee bit of pear juice in water to drink on an odd occasion, and pear purée or a whole pear with a bite out of to gnaw on. I need to trust him with pear in other ways but god knows how you cook one to make it suitable for him to eat!

pp he eats like a horse!! Have not tried rice here yet but tbh with how he eats I doubt he'd like it. Can but try though I suppose!

Today hasn't been too bad eating wise, he had a fruit pot and 2 scoops breakfast, offered toast and banana too but he didn't really eat either, lunch was puréed broccoli and cauliflower with sweet potato and he wouldn't touch it but did have a chew on some chicken and green beans and ate some custard off a spoon. I was late with tea so did him a Heinz steamed pot thing, 190g thing of sweet potato pork and apple and he ate at least half plus a yoghurt! Off a spoon! Ok so it's not home cooking but it's food! This is progress right?

Been a busy day today and I really hope everyone gets a good night sleep, night 4 of sleeping hopefully without a df, so I'm gonna grab a bit of shut eye I think! I might pick lo up some more of the steam pot things, if he likes them I will feed them and we can go from there, but I'll keep trying with proper home cooked things too and hope we get a healthy balance!

Hugs and g'night

Elizadoesdolittle Mon 17-Jun-13 22:52:46

Think pass was busy scoffing pizza when you updated izzy.

Oh I meant to say to pikz I loved your post earlier too. Such a happy post. Twas lovely to read.

izzybizzybuzzybees Mon 17-Jun-13 23:24:11

It looks that way doesn't it eliza? I'm jealous! No pizza for me now as dairy free from tomorrow. I'm channeling yellowwellies if she can do it for her J I can do it for mine!

ChasingDaisy Mon 17-Jun-13 23:39:47

I wish I knew why O doesn't sleep well. I have no idea what to do to try and fix things.

Evening/Morning all!
I've been meaning to post all day but I've got a baby that you can't take an eye off at the moment. She also seems to have regressed sad
Took 2 hours to get her to sleep tonight.

Will post properly tomorrow

LuisGarcia Tue 18-Jun-13 00:45:26

I wish I knew why O doesn't sleep well.

Because he's a baby.

YellowWellies Tue 18-Jun-13 01:30:38

Apologies but begging to disagree there Luis Chasing if your wee ones sleep is extremely disrupted ie they sleep minutes not hours and it takes hours to get them to sleep - there is often a medical reason. Don't dismiss not sleeping as normal or proof you need to instigate sleep training until you've kept a food diary to see if there is an intolerance. Extreme sleep issues like Izzy's J are rarely just behavioural - babies want to sleep for longer than 20 minutes normally other than in the midst of a growth spurt or teething. It would be useful to understand what a typical O night is like sleep wise?

LuisGarcia Tue 18-Jun-13 01:30:52

Maybe that was a bit dismissive, sorry. J is 2 3/4, and was 2.2 when L was born. He hadn't slept well in that 2.2 years, and until maybe March this year they were both as bad as each other. I've barely slept in a bed since mid 2010. It's mostly been floors and chairs.

The thing is, what became obvious over time is J has high needs. And that my kids don't sleep well. And that society's expectations are wacky. And that they are babies. They don't mean it, and they are not being mean, it's just sleep is hard. And unless you are Izzy, time helps more than you think.

There may not be a fix other than accepting you're doing everything to help him that you can already.

LuisGarcia Tue 18-Jun-13 01:34:44

interesting cross post

YellowWellies Tue 18-Jun-13 01:37:13

Though Chasing if O's sleeplessness was an issue prem weaning its unlikely to be an intolerance (he's FF isn't he?) - if he's not screeching in pain its unlikely to be CMPI.... you'd definitely have noticed more symptoms than just sleeplessness. He's not got smelly vom, back arching, lots of vom, choking noises in his throat, fighting feeds etc?

YellowWellies Tue 18-Jun-13 01:38:16

Pre weaning - fecking autocorrect... wink

YellowWellies Tue 18-Jun-13 01:44:07

High needs definitely is an option to consider - but IMHO make sure its not pain first. V 'colicky' babies seem IME to often have reflux or CMPI rather than being high needs or overstimulated though they fit the description of both.

Luis since 2010???!!! <looks for fuck off huge gold medal>

Right rolling bear now righted in cot - back to bed.... (am loving this development leap!)

Bryzoan Tue 18-Jun-13 01:47:23

Realised today that hovis best of both bread has no dairy - and added calcium. G was in heaven with that and humous (sp?). Yw - how are you giving the tinned salmon?

LuisGarcia Tue 18-Jun-13 01:55:10

and right on cue, bry gets gold, not me. thanks anyway.

ChasingDaisy Tue 18-Jun-13 03:24:48

Thanks luis and YW. Compared to many here, his sleep isn't terrible, he just cannot seem to sleep longer than 3-4 hours. I'm sorry Izzy, that sounds incredibly insensitive, but I did think his sleep would be better than this by now.

He feeds to sleep at 7pm and goes down fine. He will then wake 2.5-3 hours later and has a 3-4oz feed. Repeat every 2-3 hours. He always seems quite unsettled when sleeping, wriggling etc but no reflux symptoms.

ChasingDaisy Tue 18-Jun-13 03:28:24

Yep, he is ff. Pre weaning he was steadily getting better at sleeping but weaning seems to have affected things. Wheat was definitely an issue, as was cheese. Both me and XP have food allergies, O has eczema and has had an allergic reaction to apricots. Maybe his tum is just getting used to food?

Bryzoan Tue 18-Jun-13 03:41:41

Chasing - maybe it is worth asking for some allergy testing?

Luis - nope, no medals here. R was a rubbish sleeper as a baby but sorted it before I got pregnant with g. How you and mrsG found the energy to make L on that little sleep is beyond me!

GTbaby Tue 18-Jun-13 04:25:13

I wake up to texts from bil telling me Fucking Stupid husband will be home late. Why the Fuck is bil txting me to tell me this at 1.45? I'll tell you why. Cos stupid fucking husband is in hospital. He fell over. Guess what. He was drunk.

LuisGarcia Tue 18-Jun-13 05:27:37

is he injured?

Bryzoan Tue 18-Jun-13 05:35:02

Oh gt. How infuriating.

GTbaby Tue 18-Jun-13 06:26:07

From what I've worked out. Police found him. Called medics. His blood pressure was crazy high so they took him to hospital. Tried calling house phone but couldn't get through. Somehow called his brother. His blood pressure is not coming down so they won't let him come home. They also want to do a head scan.

I'm just so angry. So fed up. Trying to work out what to do.
I can't go to my folks. They will loose it.
No friends I can stay with for a few days.
Contemplating going to a hotel. An expensive one. Who will just do everything for me. But I have lo with me and things are not as simple as walking out any more.

PetiteRaleuse Tue 18-Jun-13 07:03:47

(((hugs))) GT It is pretty clear that your DH has a definite problem, it is having a major impact on his wellbeing and on that of his family (you) and there is now NO CHOICE. He has to stop drinking, completely. There's no cutting down or compromise with alcoholism I'm afraid. Once you're an alcoholic you are always an alcoholic.

The advice yesterday to call al-anon was good. Please do it they are very supportive. My dad finally died from his drinking 5 years ago. I was delighted. My childhood had revolved around him and his drinking, and completely screwed up my concept of what healthy relationships are like. All four of his children, and my mum, are still finding it very hard to come to terms with what a massive impact living with an alcoholic had on us.

Your DH is about to have DC2, and could quite easily have killed himself last night. There's no choice. He has to stop or you will have to take your children out of that situation. Sorry if that sounds harsh. Alcohol abuseaffects everyone, not just the addict.

Donnadoon Tue 18-Jun-13 07:04:32

GT Hopefully this might be the shock he needs...make sure you show no sympathy to him.

PetiteRaleuse Tue 18-Jun-13 07:04:47

Are his parents still in India?

Pikz Tue 18-Jun-13 07:29:06

GT I am so sorry.

brew For all the shit nights

DP did the early shift so am just getting up. Lush.

Brockle Tue 18-Jun-13 07:33:33

gt maybe going to your mums and your family losing it is what your dh needs. It might shame him to change and you would have the support you need. I don't think you should be alone with him when he is like this. xxx

A week to go before work so we are all up and dressed as a dry run. ugh.

Y and ds2 are working as a tag team. If one sleeps through the other wakes up and vice versa. Given that Y can't speak I am trying to work out how they are communicating. Perhaps Y's obsessive hand clapping has a deeper meaning hmm hmmm..

one pot chicken with green peas and butt squash went down a treat yesterday. Today we are trying baby pasta. Do you put tinned salmon in normal AK recipes? Oh and Y loves trifle blush

GTbaby Tue 18-Jun-13 07:39:56

Yes parents in India.

PurplePidjin Tue 18-Jun-13 08:18:07

2nd wake up shock

1st was 00:30, and wasn't long enough for me to catch up with the fred, then 3:45 and he's slowing now...

<jaw hits floor>

Update because my Internet died... He went back down at 4:00 and slept till 6 grin

YellowWellies Tue 18-Jun-13 08:19:37

GT I agree with PR. LBT might not be an option culturally but then you said drinking too is against your faith? He is going to damage your boys and their view of how a man should act - not least risk killing himself if he doesn't stop. Not cut down. Stop sad

Bryzoan Tue 18-Jun-13 08:22:23

I hope he is ok gt. So sad for you. Another vote here for you going to your parents. It should all be about you and the babies now.

Brockle - love the idea of hand clapping morse code. Think we have some of that here too.

PurplePidjin Tue 18-Jun-13 08:24:14

GT, that's exactly what happened to me on 27th December last year - except that dp is sporty, healthy, doesn't drink or smoke. His health is the only reason he survived. Now is the time for drastic, before he ends up dead or disabled

Apologies for bluntness but you have to protect yourself and H and Bean. It's terrifying, i know thanks

BigPigLittlePig Tue 18-Jun-13 08:37:29

Oh GT ((hugs)) - I agree with what everyone else has said. He needs a short, sharp shock to try to make him see sense. The problem with addictions is that everything bar alcohol/drugs/whatever ceases to be as important - including family and children. I hope he can sort himself out, for the sake of you all xx

Chasing I really thought F would be sleeping through by the time I returned to work. I go back in 12 days time. Last night she woke 5 times between 7 and 7. Sleeping through she most definitely is not.

PR glad you're still enjoying your hols.

Eliza sorry if I missed, but where are you going away? I'm sure the flight will be ok hmm - or at least, not as bad as you think it will be.

So this morning I am awarding myself the BFI award (Big Fucking Idiot), as for some crazy reason I decided to lower Fs ranitidine dose yesterday. I had put it up whilst she was teething. Well, what an error. She had such a disturbed night, and when I brought her into bed with us a 5, she smelt of acidy sick sad. Like I said. Big. Fucking. Idiot. Higher dose has been given again this morning, think we'll stick to that.

Evilwater Tue 18-Jun-13 08:51:59

GT another vote for your parents. I just hope he wakes ups to this.

I'm feeling much better, than yesterday. I Deffo overreacted yesterday, blush. Sorry everyone sad no wired stuff in his nappy. N woke up 3 times last night. P was excellent in waking up and seeing to him.

Evil

TheDetective Tue 18-Jun-13 09:11:33

Gt good luck at work. And I can only echo what everyone else says. He is being a total dick. I hope this gives him a massive wake up call.

I'm fuming but happy. confused After going to bed at 10.30 I was still awake at 1 O had already woken just before 11 and took a lot of rocking back to sleep. So at 1 when he started crying and I was still lay there awake I hit DP with the pillow and told him to deal with him Because I was going the fuck downstairs, taking nytol, and staying on the sofa.

Which I did. Til 8 this morning. Bliss.

I thought O had gone and slept through til then! Turns out he didn't, but he did self settle after I stropped off. And didn't wake til 6 then back to sleep til 7.30 when the alarm going off woke him!!

So. DP CAN wake. Fuming that if he knows he has to he fucking well can.

He will be doing this loren

TheDetective Tue 18-Jun-13 09:13:04

Effing phone.

Anyway.

He will be doing this more often from now on. Twat.

angry

Still. 7 hours sleep for me! <Fist punches air>

And O slept 7 hours too!!

BigPigLittlePig Tue 18-Jun-13 09:18:50

<eeeeeeeep>

Have just been booked to work a locum shift 1-10pm on Friday. That is in THREE DAYS TIME people.

<gulps>

Can't remember a single effing thing, I'm so fuckity fucked

YellowWellies Tue 18-Jun-13 09:33:22

Early nap.... wooo we might make playgroup before the last half hour!

Evil good work P for getting up with the wee man. Hope you're feeling better.

Det could you get DP to give O fish - I'm struggling to think where he'd get important trace minerals like iodine if he's not having fish and dairy.

BPLP I'm the same, always wanting to reduce his dose and find him miraculously cured - it always bites us on the ass too.

So we have to try soy traces this month (not full on soy). He can already tolerate soy lecithin fine as it has v little soy protein in it. What should I try? desperately fights urge to go to all you can eat Chinese buffet

Chasing gaaahhh 2 hour chunks are almost short enough to think there could be a problem but 3 hour chunks almost long enough to think there isn't sad that sucks ass hon. Cheeky question - do you snore? I do like a dying wildebeast and if J and I sleep in the same room now I definitely disturb him. Is there any improvement if you sleep in separate rooms?

Pass great news on the child minder. Will she take Jonas for a week to get him napping in his cot? grin

YellowWellies Tue 18-Jun-13 09:35:53

BPLP I'm curious - will you be a different doc now you're a Ma? Will you give more credence to neurotic Mothers instincts as evidenced by quiche bear Mommas? Can you make sure your colleagues read up on CMPI? grin

ChasingDaisy Tue 18-Jun-13 09:39:01

GT massive hugs. It sounds like things are really getting out of control now. Do you think this will be a wake up call for him?

YW I breathe heavily in my sleep, but rarely snore. No difference in sleep with him in his own room. You are exactly right, he sleeps just well enough that I think he must be fine, but not quite well enough for me to believe it confused I am wondering if it is purely hunger so am going to try and increase his food intake.

pass I meant to say before, nap times are a battle here too. If I'm lucky he feeds to sleep, if not then I have to cuddle and rock him into submission. I too find it very stressful. His awake time has increased from 90mins to 2 hours which has helped marginally.

BigPigLittlePig Tue 18-Jun-13 09:43:34

YW most of my patients are of the, erm, older, variety. So it is rare to find neurotic mothers. I think I have always been quite empathetic emotional wreck and I think I will be more so blubbering wreck in certain circumstances. Motherhood has given me an appreciation for life that I didn't previously get.

BigPigLittlePig Tue 18-Jun-13 09:44:27

So to sum up, I'll be a wreck.

A wreck with no clue. And these people are paying me!?

Passmethecrisps Tue 18-Jun-13 09:44:55

O ehm gee BP! Scary biscuits to the max!

Sorry for the pizzalude last night - totally missed izzy's update. Poor wee James and poor izzy. Mind you, thank goodness for responsive paeds and allergy testing.

Glad things seem better evil. I must say I thought you were very relaxed t the thought of worms. I would have had a total freak.

GT I can't add anything to what has already been said. Your DH's behaviour is so incredibly selfish and shows clear signs of addiction - he obviously has no limits and exercises no self-control. Thinking he is ok because he doesn't drink at work is astonishing. And frankly, it sounds like it is only matter of time before he breaks that pretty low standard as well. I honestly believe that your parents losing it is the least of your worries. You have 1.5 babies to think abou as well as your own well being. You can't carry on pretending to them.

Thank you for your nap support yesterday. I left it a bit longer this morning and while she still had a bit of a cry and a leg kick when I lowered her in to the cot to put her sleeping bag on she calmed quickly and snuggled in for a cuddle before settling to sleep.

Today's anxiety is back to weaning. P seems to have regressed after appearing to start to get it. Previously I had fail safe foods like broccoli and toast which she enjoyed eating. The last two days she has pretty much refused to put anything in her mouth at all. She just smooges things in her hands and shudders. I did manage to get her to eat some beef casserole spread on rice cakes. Can I feed her everything on rice cakes? Probably better than toast. She also seems to have gone off fruit 100%.

I am starting to get concerned about her lack of interest. I pop her in her chair, she gets very excited, she gets all oooooo face at whatever I am preparing for her but when it actually goes on her chair she clamps her mouth shut.
Then she starts grimacing and shuddering. Meh

Passmethecrisps Tue 18-Jun-13 09:51:44

Interesting question yw. I have also found that having a baby has made me more emotional. I'm not entirely comfortable with it really. I'm not a fan of randomly bursting into tears at adverts on the telly or any news story related to babies.

I had wondered if having my own child would make me a different Guidance Teacher. I think I will be different. No entirely convinced I will be better.

And YW it did occur to me that the CM would just fix everything that I am anxious about thus creating a happy napper and enthusiastic nommer out of P.

Passmethecrisps Tue 18-Jun-13 09:54:27

Oh! And another one here who periodically decides to stop medicating or reduce it deciding that it must all be better now. Doc told me to up P's omeprazole to 10ml. Did I? Nope. I went to 6ml. DH has pushed me to 7.5ml because he rightly pointed out that P smells. I am a moron.

Evilwater Tue 18-Jun-13 09:57:00

BP you'll be fine, you have the nurses to help you.
det fresh fish should not smell. I repeat fresh fish should not smell fishy. You lot need to come to the SW as we have the sea on 3 sides. I bet you will like fish then. smile
pass I'm feeling better in my self, but I still have not eaten a meal in 3 days. I know I wanted to lose weight, but not like this!

Me and N are off to soft play, as N has been good as gold and deserves a great.
Evil

YellowWellies Tue 18-Jun-13 10:04:19

Pass Jonas is on 8ml twice a day (he's 7.5kg) he was off his food totally for 3 days last week - think he was under the weather or teeth - he's back onto it with gusto this week. Don't worry - she'll catch up in a few days. Maybe her fangs are moving?

BigPigLittlePig Tue 18-Jun-13 10:08:56

8ml!? F is on 1.5 at the mo, I had tried dropping it to 1.2. Twat.

Given her newfound chomping skills, I gave her some dairy free cake. Oh em gee. When camera battery is charged, will get a photo of "cake face" aka died and gone to heaven face

Pass could it be that a flare of reflux has put her off her food? F does this quite often, and once things are settled, picks up again v quickly.

MadamGazelleIsMyMum Tue 18-Jun-13 10:12:23

Good luck BP. It will actually be ok. Somehow, stuff is deep down inside your brain. Prob a good idea to locum before return to work? Like a KIT day, a bit of confidence building, a practice run, chance to see that arrangements do work?

GT perhaps this is a wake up call? I hope this enables your DH to seek help he so obviously needs.

luis and izzy so much sympathy for sleep issues.

So last night's row got worse after I posted. We were both vile to each other. I was in no danger though - DH would never hurt me physically. But we were angry, sweary, emotionally abusive to each other. Both cried. I cried a lot. Have puffy red eyes today. Both DC woke and cried due to shouting/disruption of routine. I feel drained and shit. Like a properly crap parent for allowing them to be affected by an argument.

But I am sick of the same argument over, and over again. About how I have all the responsibilty for absolutely fucking everything. Am the breadwinner, work full time, and this will always be the case for me, forever. I am completely in charge of finances and all paperwork, in charge of noticing all the things that need doing around the house, although he will do what he is asked to do, I do all the menu planning, shopping list making, majority of cooking, all of DS's cooking - DH, despite being a fucking chef, has not made either DC any weaning food EVER, he's only cooked for them once they eat what we eat. I do all of the developmental stuff with the DC - I get them weighed, checked, I establish routines, decide when someone needs to drop a feed, what sleep strategy to employ, what to try next, what isnt working and what needs changing, what food to introduce next. I also deal with all of the maintenance and contact arrangements with his exP about DSD, I do all of the instigation of FUCKING everything - we're getting healthy because I am motivated, I have to plan and sort birthday presents, Christmas, or it doesnt get done, I plan all of DH's SAH days to make them easier and better for him and the DC because otherwise he'd look after their basic needs, but wouldnt do much and would then moan about how hard work it is - I plan for his benefit, to get him out and about and get the DC exercised and entertained so they are easier to handle. I spend my evenings - my only free time - planning meals, making the next day's meals, cleaning, packing bags, planning finances, ebaying stuff to make money, then bed. He spends his free time on the xbox. I do all of the night wakings because DH sleeps too deeply.

DH is quite happy to follow instructions, i.e. I notice x needs doing, and he will do it. If I ask about 50 million times. But he has no initiative. Nothing would ever fucking happen unless I instigated it, and then asked it to happen. And then remember it needs to be done, and remember to ask and ask and ask until it is done. I don't want to be the only adult in the household. I don't want to continually have to teach someone how to parent, how to function. Who teaches me? Who tells me and reminds me when something needs doing? No one. And yes, I could stop. But I have to do it all for us to function - if I didnt do it all, it wouldnt happen, and it would be a mess, and the DC and I would suffer from stuff not having been done. I dont know what the fuck to do.

There was talk about cloning oneself - I'd have me and me every fucking day. At the moment I just feel like DH is another burden on me. And I think I carry quite enough of those. I've basically said shape up or ship out. I know I am harsh. I sound like a bitch. But I dont have time or energy to carry someone else, the very someone who is supposed to support me. Gah.

One silver lining - I was so tired and cross and upset that after an hour of rocking, shushhing, patting etc DS, well after DD and DH had gone back to sleep, that I just put him in the cot and told him firmly to go to sleep, and left the room. He cried for 10 seconds, groped for his dummy, and went to sleep. He work for the day 3 hours later, but still. It is actually possible for him to settle himself.

Passmethecrisps Tue 18-Jun-13 10:12:48

P is 6.7kg and is now on 7.5ml of omeprazole a day.

Yeah, I wonder if there might be teeth or a sore throat or something going on. I will keep offering and try not to get too arse clenchy about it.

Can't wait to see cake face BP!

GTbaby Tue 18-Jun-13 10:28:20

Thank you for your advice. Still not sure what I'm going to do.

His brother just called. They are doing a head scan to check for damage. will refrain from commenting, obviously he has something wrong with his head

Not able to go to work today so even more upset about whole situation.

YellowWellies Tue 18-Jun-13 10:40:22

For omeperazole users - our paed advised:

Low dose range is 0.7 - 1.5mg per kilogram per day.
High dose range is 1.5 - 3.0mg per kilogram per day.
Very high dose range is up to 3.0 - 3.3mg per kilogram per day.

YellowWellies Tue 18-Jun-13 10:40:45

Oh GT sad

BigPigLittlePig Tue 18-Jun-13 10:57:15

Thanks YW - I misread what pass wrote, and thought P was on 7.5mls each time! F has 3mls a day. Have been saying it for weeks but I am weighing her today at baby group.

GT ((hugs))

izzybizzybuzzybees Tue 18-Jun-13 11:26:46

How is the omeprazole administered? Is it a tablet dissolved or do you get the liquid?

MadamGazelleIsMyMum Tue 18-Jun-13 11:28:04

GT sad

Pikz Tue 18-Jun-13 11:34:12

GT huge huge hugs. You and2.5 DC come first.

Madam big hug for you. Appears some more DP lessons are needed I these parts from Luis.

BP you will be ace. Like riding a bike non?

Pikz Tue 18-Jun-13 11:34:48

1.5 that should say

Lily311 Tue 18-Jun-13 12:14:07

gthuge hugs, I truly hope it's a wake up call and second that you go to your parents.

madam hugs to you too.

We are staying in today. I have an assignment to write and submit ( yep, once again I left it till last min). Also it's 35 degrees outside. This was one of the reasons I left Hungary 10 years ago, I hate summer here. I'm grateful for air con.

Pikz Tue 18-Jun-13 12:53:46

Anyone else have a very very wilful 6/7 month old.

Proper temper tantrums and stuff?

Kyzordz Tue 18-Jun-13 13:17:57

Helloooo everybuddy, just put the beanist down for a nap, unfortunately will have to wake him for weigh in but I'm hoping it doesn't disrupt things too much!

brew for the bad nights, guys

gt I don't even know what to say about your dh sad you really don't need the stress though it isn't good for you, lo or the baby. I agree with pr he needs to stop drinking completely because he clearly can't moderate himself.

Glad you had some success with her nap pass smile I really shouldn't advise you on weaning, I'm such a wreck when it comes to it, but I have done a lot better the past few days and decided all I can do is offer him a variety of mush and finger foods and let him take it or leave it. He has milk and an appetite and he'll get the even if slower than others. Clearly we are not gifted with babies who open their mouths like little birds for anything on a spoon, or pick up bits of anything and get on with it every time. However, we ARE gifted with healthy happy little people who sleep pretty well, are developing and changing daily in such a beautiful way, and have wonderful characters. They'll get there in the end smile

How is p's appetite for milk?

What I do for e is try to remember he drinks his bottles and try to keep something to hand I know he'll eat, for example for breakfast I offered weetabix and did a slice of toast also. For lunch I offered tomato and cheese rice which was super fun but he cannot eat it well, plus rice cakes because I know he can eat those, and some orange jelly cos he loves jelly. You can spread lots of things on rice cakes, and keep persevering. Eric is getting a tray full of spag Bol tonight and good luck to him I say.

I realise my attitude changes like the wind but I'm trying to explain that even though I still worry he won't eat etc etc, he is fine and I know that too. Eric has started to pick back up again after dropping his df four days ago and I wonder if that has any thing to do with it. He also seems to eat better when he has his Lamaze bug toy stuck on the tray, he plays with it in between eating and seems more relaxed. You could try that perhaps if you haven't already? I'm sure in a week he will refuse food again and I'll be back to being a wreck but I'm going to try my hardest not to. Bottles are offered before meals and I am trying to keep everything more relaxed and it seems to be helping the both of us.

Big hugs madame do you think dh will change his ways or at least try a bit more after the argument you had?

PurplePidjin Tue 18-Jun-13 13:39:03

<<<hug>>> GT i know how scary it is brew <holds hand>

R weighs 15lb5 1/2 and has jumped from 0.4th to 9th centile! shockgrin

GTbaby Tue 18-Jun-13 14:33:05

He is home. So I guess scan is ok. I'm not talking to him so no idea. And ATM. I'm just trying to stay calm.
Lo is being a lil terror n keeps screaming. Just need him to take a nap so I can just have 5 mins to sleep. I'm exhausted.

Just realised I've had the annabel Karmel book all along blush

TheDetective Tue 18-Jun-13 15:09:01

Madam. I could have written your post word for word almost. I feel like I have 3 children.

I going to show your post to DP and ask if be recognises himself in your words.

And hope that the message might get through.

I'm the main earner. Always will be. Work full time. Always will have to while children are young.

I need him to use his initiative. These are always the basis for arguements in chez detective.

So no advice. But just know you aren't alone. My mouth was open reading at the similarities.

Pikz Yes. He's been like this for about 2.5 months since he could roll really. Hard work. I'm hoping crawling or walking will see him chilling the fuck out! It did for DS1. Buy I don't remember him being as strong/willful as O!!

fruitpastilles Tue 18-Jun-13 15:11:14

Only just caught up, gt I can't really add much to what everyone else has said, I too hope this is a massive wake up call for him!
Big hugs madam apart from being the breadwinner and working full time, as I do neither, you have pretty much described my dp, in 7 months he has changed 2 nappies and done 0 night shifts. He does nothing round the house, which in the week I wouldn't expect off him as he is at work and I am at home, but even on the weekend he does fuck all, doesn't help with S or anything, he says its his 2 days off! I know how hard it is for me and that's without having the worry of being the main breadwinner and working full time on top of that, so I can't imagine how it must be for you.

Rihanna was brilliant last night! Missed my little monkey though, she had massive smiles from me when I picked her up from my mums today.
Back to the doctors again in an hour, she's wheezing something terrible!

ChasingDaisy Tue 18-Jun-13 15:18:48

Pidj all that food is doing its job then grin

Madam I am sure a lot of us can identify with being being responsible for all parenting and domestic duties, but for you to work full time as well must be so stressful.

GT you ok? Do you know what you are going to do going forwards?

Making a couple of AK recipes for the freezer tomorrow and am going to give O a try of bread again.

Elizadoesdolittle Tue 18-Jun-13 15:20:51

bigpig we are off to Cyprus. Got a villa with my sis and my bil. Oh and DH too of course. I'm really looking forward to it, I'm hoping it will be fairly relaxing. Well as relaxing as it can be with 2 kids. We have a private pool and beach is 2 mins walk so shouldn't have any need to go far. I should be packing but E is now napping on me!

gt that's awful. I'm so sorry. I like to think it will be a wake up call but he will probably just shrug it off as just one of those things. I have a lot of experience of heavy drinkers and alcoholics and they are excellent at dismissing situations like this. I really do hope he will change his ways but I think it will take something more extreme than a fall to make him do so.

MadamGazelleIsMyMum Tue 18-Jun-13 16:23:14

Thanks for the kind words. Some of what I have been screaming saying must have sunk in, because he sent me a long email this morning acknowledging his contribution is nowhere remotely near what it needs to be and promising to try harder. He also managed to use his initiative and take DS to the dr for his cough not entirely necessary, but he's trying and I'm sure he will have made an effort for when I get home. I am a bit skeptical, not least because he is good at knowing when I have reached the end of my tether and knowing what to say and do for a limited time, but it is long term changes to behaviour that I need, not promises which I cannot rely on.

I know many of you will have the same parenting burdens and will recognise much of what I say. And then there are lily, chasing and others, facing life as a single parent, which is immeasurably harder I am sure. I certainly feel that getting it all out of my system was incredibly cathartic, so that helped, and knowing others have felt like this makes me feel less unique. I am the only breadwinning FT WOH mother I know IRL. A lot of my professional, childless friends think I have a fantastic set up - no impact on career by working part time/having main childcare burden, and a DH who is happy to take on childcare and ostensibly pull his weight on the domestic front. They don't know that I mainly feel like it just means twice the burden, and despite my enjoyment of my job and the fact I am very happy to work, I would ultimately caution in the strongest terms any woman who is likely to be in my position to think extremely carefully about whether that will work longterm.

Anyway. Sometimes a big blow out can be helpful. I'm not the kind of person to keep in how I feel, at least not with DH. No one in our household holds back. Which, for us, is a good thing, overall. And I know that we're capable of forgiving each other for the visciously vile things we say in the heat of the moment, and accepting it was the rage talking. So we'll see.

LuisGarcia Tue 18-Jun-13 16:46:12

Words you never want to hear your wife squeal number 437:

"eeewwwwww go to daddy"

fruitpastilles Tue 18-Jun-13 16:54:32

Back from docs, S has viral bronchitis. I don't exactly know what that is, do any of you?

GTbaby Tue 18-Jun-13 16:57:25

Just spoke to mum and she's been sent home from work unwell. So didn't really want to burden her with my issues. yes I'm finding reasons to not tell her

I'm not sure what I'm going to do. I kinda want to see what he does.
And other part of me is so tiered I just want to sleep.

ChasingDaisy Tue 18-Jun-13 18:39:07

I think you need to sleep before you make any decisions GT. Assuming your mum isn't seriously ill, then I'm sure she would love to support you.

I just really want you to have some RL support x

YellowWellies Tue 18-Jun-13 20:09:46

Quiet on here tonight....

Lily311 Tue 18-Jun-13 20:22:21

Am here, submitted the assignment. 200 words under but I can't be arsed. I just don't get why I need to write a report on some bullshit based on the shortest chapter (5 pages) in history. Never mind.

O is stirring, I'm in for a bad night. She has been very unsettled this pm, I'm suspecting a tooth might come through by morning.

My mum again offered to have her overnight but I declined, I can't do it yet. We could in theory stay with my parents' on sat night with my friend but I don't want her to feel uncomfortable. I booked a babysitter for fri night, it's very cheap here.

ChasingDaisy Tue 18-Jun-13 20:23:44

I can't ever see myself being able to leave O, Lily. Even more so now.

Tis very quiet hefe tonight.

Pikz Tue 18-Jun-13 20:27:27

Here. Stressing about having a jet lagged baby next week.

MadamGazelleIsMyMum Tue 18-Jun-13 20:31:41

Here too, with a slightly poorly DS. Have happily abandoned a run for cuddles.

pikz fingers crossed lo won't be too affected!

ChasingDaisy Tue 18-Jun-13 20:32:19

So, I have survived my first week of single parent-dom. Am celebrating by eating hula hoops in bed.

MadamGazelleIsMyMum Tue 18-Jun-13 20:34:28

chasing wine

LuisGarcia Tue 18-Jun-13 20:39:02

Here, making coleslaw and being summoned by tiny shouty people.

LuisGarcia Tue 18-Jun-13 20:39:40

congrats chasing

ChasingDaisy Tue 18-Jun-13 20:40:06

Is MrsG a midget?

MadamGazelleIsMyMum Tue 18-Jun-13 20:40:56

Passes wine around for quiche members to celebrate chasing's single status!

Pikz Tue 18-Jun-13 20:45:01

Ooooooooh wine

Am still chuckling at mrs G the midgit

LuisGarcia Tue 18-Jun-13 20:46:07

haha

ChasingDaisy Tue 18-Jun-13 20:47:18

Let's all get tiddly.

I am actually feeling pretty good. I feel free.

MadamGazelleIsMyMum Tue 18-Jun-13 20:51:01

That's awesome chasing grin

Evilwater Tue 18-Jun-13 20:51:33

GT (((((((huge hugs))))
chasing congrats on the first week!
madam I have no words, here have a wine

Today, I've gone to soft play as N has been very good over the weekend. N might have the bug I had on the weekend sad so I've cleaned all downstairs with hot soapy water, including his mountine of toys, and car seat.

P on the other hand, has it too. Of course he dismissed it when I had it, now he has the plague!

Evil

TheDetective Tue 18-Jun-13 20:59:08

I'm here!

Trying to think of things to say.

Nope. I got nuffink. grin

Oh, I got one thing! I got the Oatly - Tesco had it! Of all the places I hate going to. I tasted it. Yuk. Sorry! Well, O is having it with porridge or weetabix, so I shouldn't think he will mind. grin

Evilwater Tue 18-Jun-13 21:03:47

No swearing det ?
Evil

GTbaby Tue 18-Jun-13 21:11:31

Hi chasing. I have rl support. My best friend came over before and after work. She couldn't stay long but she is here.

He remembers leaving his friends in a cab. He doesn't know how he ended up on the road. I'm reluctant to think there is anything dodgy as he has not lost wallet/ring/gold bangle/phone.
Dr were convinced he has taken drugs as his heart was going crazy. However I believe him on that one. He is very anti drugs. His head is fine though.

I've slept now. But I'm in that hazy foggy awakness. I just want some chocolate.

ValiumQueen Tue 18-Jun-13 21:12:08

Here ready for sweary Wednesday. J awake as in pain. He is playing in his DJ booth. So long as he is upright he is ok. He is snotty too, so around we go again.

Evilwater Tue 18-Jun-13 21:13:35

Should I sleep in N room? Or risk with P??
Evil

ValiumQueen Tue 18-Jun-13 21:14:48

GT is he drinking every day? What time of the day does he start drinking? What does he drink? Can he go a day without alcohol? You do not need to answer these questions, but it will help to give an idea of how serious a problem he has.

ValiumQueen Tue 18-Jun-13 21:15:42

J has grown out of his 12-18 gros. I have cut the feet off them.

Evilwater Tue 18-Jun-13 21:17:31

Wow vq
Evil

MadamGazelleIsMyMum Tue 18-Jun-13 21:29:41

VQ wow indeed! I though DS was long as he's needing the 9-12 month gros already, but clearly he's a midget compared with J!

izzybizzybuzzybees Tue 18-Jun-13 21:35:19

J is wide awake here too vq quite happy in his play nest. Hasn't been fed for 4hrs 15mins. If he could go that long at night I'd be thrilled!!

Contemplating trying another bottle of the neocate but maybe mixing with BM? Tho I don't want him refusing it and wasting breastmilk :-( wish it tasted better!

YellowWellies Tue 18-Jun-13 21:36:04

Wow VQ I was celebrating a move out of some 3-6 month grows and the last of his 0-3 month vests (at a few days shy of 8 months) smile babies come in all shapes and sizes and laugh in the face of age based clothing sizes! grin grin grin

Passmethecrisps Tue 18-Jun-13 22:12:45

<quiche walks into thread>

<slaps some 5s>

S'up?

Ya diggin my gangsta? Fancied a wee change.

Anyhoo. How are y'all?

wine and