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March 2013 - gurgles, giggles and going on holiday (for some of us at least!)

(996 Posts)
pudtat Tue 04-Jun-13 21:57:52

Will this do? Never started a thread before so hope this works...

previous thread

vjhist85 Tue 04-Jun-13 22:11:56

Place marking for 4.30am feed- thanks pud!

zigwig Tue 04-Jun-13 22:51:33

Thanks pud.

I'm wondering if the warm weather accounts for the sleepy babies. I'm always more sleepy if it's hot. Farty pants slept loads more than usual yesterday but unfortunately that seems to have just made him more awake today. He's on the verge of waking up again now and I so wanted to go to sleep. It doesn't help that there's a party down the road and it's too warm to have the windows shut. Bad combination for restless baby. He's kicking about like a looney and I can't figure out if he's trying to kick the cover off because he's too hot or just doing it to aid farting. He doesn't feel hot to the touch but I'm worried he might be too hot, or even too cold! What's everyone done about layers tonight?

pudtat Wed 05-Jun-13 01:22:21

Argh, yes. A problem here too. The bedroom was 21.6 earlier so I'd opened the window wide to cool things down. When I came to bed at 9.30 couldn't work out why still boiling, only to have DH tell me he'd shut it cos it was cooling down in here! Now 21.4 and I'm too hot at any rate... DS is in sleep suit, 1tog sleeping bag with swaddling blanket wrapped just over his arms. This allows kicky legs but controls flaily arms. Feels ok now I've got him up to feed... I may have to open window more though.

SoYo Wed 05-Jun-13 01:25:57

Thanks Pud, love the title.

I've got a really massive day tomorrow, got to appear as a witness for an investigation from work so all a bit stressful and of course that means madam can't possibly sleep as well as she has in previous nights plus I've got a banging head that I'm not enjoying much. All in all, I'd quite like time to roll on 24hrs!

pudtat Wed 05-Jun-13 01:54:00

Anyone see this Finnish babies sleep in boxes

Guide to temp and clothing in the link to their govt guidance is interesting...

KFFOREVER Wed 05-Jun-13 02:28:32

A brand new thread... Exciting.

Its feeding time here. When ds woke once at night on a couple of occassions i thought we had a break through but nah. Its all changed again. MIL comes tomorrow night and dh is excited. You may see me on here more often ranting away. She too is untidy just like dh.

Soyo good luck for tomorrow. Its a shame a work thing is interupting your mat leave.

KFFOREVER Wed 05-Jun-13 02:29:10

And pud thanks for the new thread.

ecofreckle Wed 05-Jun-13 03:30:50

Thanks pud!
Admiring vj for her ability to predict feed times. Our first night feed was at 0030 last night and tonight 0315. Been 0400 in past. I can't see any pattern to it at all. So kf we're with you. And, rant away. I bet we'll all be able to empathize!
zig we abandoned vest couple weeks ago, have sleep suit and one tog bag. Alre windows open all day. It seems ok and so does dd fx.
soyo we'll be thinking of you, that's a horrid thing at the best of times. Hope it goes smoothly. Remember two glasses of wine await!
Lovely day today, sunshine and plenty of time kicking around on blanket in fresh air. The baby has had fun too ;-)
Had comedy capers when we noticed red flashing light on a monitor next to baby crib in holiday cottage. Cue lots of googling as paranoid first time mum convinces self it's a carbon monoxide issue. After texting owner we discovered it's a mouse deterrent machine.
Right, I have successfully achieved snoring baby and husband so it's my turn now. I'm loving listening to sound of lambs through window plonko :-)

vjhist85 Wed 05-Jun-13 05:53:01

Yeah she's fairly predictable, seems to find a time and stick to it for a couple of weeks before getting a bit later! The last two weeks have been 4.50 (very specific my little one!) but this morning was 5.30! 7am is so close I can almost taste it! I'm convinced the 10pm dream feed is responsible for the improved sleeping, previously we tried waking her up fully for it, but I figured that would make me grumpy, and not doing it at all, but she's too little to make it past 3am when she's gone down at 7.

It is too hot. Tiddler is in two pj layers (thin sleep suit with pjs over the top) and just a sheet over her- we have to do the two layers thing because she's an awful kicker. I'm desperate to have the window wide open but she's next to it and I'm sure the breeze banging the blinds would keep her up. Can't win, I complained when it was so cold that we had to have the heating on all night!

pudtat Wed 05-Jun-13 05:53:39

Lol at mouse deterrent Eco grin.

My first kit day today. Nervous for several reasons:
It will be the longest I have left DS by far
I feel woefully out of touch with markets etc as i have deliberately given myself these three months off, today marks beginning of somehow needing to stay better in touch hmm
I am unsure how much use I will be having got to bed after last feed yesterday at gone 11pm, fed 1am to 2:15am and then got up again at 5:15. I will need to feed him once more before I go so expect to only get another 30 mins or so of sleep tonight confused
I look fat in those of my work clothes I can physically even do up how shallow am I?
In an office of 23 there are 2 new members of staff since I went on mat leave - feels odd to think they have no idea who Ian except in principal...

SoYo, given all my feelings about the above, good luck as should still be much more pleasant experience than your work day.

Respect Eig and Rainbow, those are tough careers. Sleep deprivation must be a doddle for you though.... as doesn't that define the day job grin?

Pud we're only going as far as Bideford on family duty flying visit, so although a coffee would have been a lot of fun I don't think it's feasible. What's a kit day btw? I have this lovely image of you in army kit yomping across Dartmoor with a baby on your back. Obviously it's not that...

Similarly befuddled over what to do with night layers here. Room was very warm last night so window open and one blanket was about right. However, it quickly cooled down meaning smallest person woke up in a grump, cold, and had to be pacified with a snuggly feed in the big bed, and then was not even slightly amenable to the idea of going back to her own inferior sleeping quarters. Bit tired this morning as a result - yaawwnnn. Another day of the builders in the kitchen as well. Sob. Lovely though there are I can't help but feel they might be lovelier if they left.

Good luck SoYo, hope it goes well.

Enjoy the sunshine everyone. I'm a bit gutted about the weather myself, as it is too warm for the baby carrier (according to mini-worse), so my outings are restricted to pram friendly routes. That eliminates just about every one of my favourite field and forest options sad

pudtat Wed 05-Jun-13 07:20:36

Kit = KIT= keep in touch days. You're allowed up to 10 days where you go into work (and get paid!) without buggering up your mat leave.

pudtat Wed 05-Jun-13 07:22:14

And think its DH who fancies yomping across the moor with LO on his back. The only purchase he's at all looking forward to is a back carrier once DS is big enough!

zigwig Wed 05-Jun-13 08:44:42

Well I opted for a sleepsuit and cellular blanket in the end. He did kick the blanket off a couple of times but he's been doing that as standard these days so I don't think he was too hot although OH was so kept me awake all night fidgeting. Might go for grobag tonight. I must try to fish the fan out today incase of another boiling bedroom.

Do babies get hayfever? He's really snuffly at the moment and starts sneezing everytime we go into the garden.

Right must see if I can get him to let me have a shower. Have good days all.

Eigmum Wed 05-Jun-13 09:01:33

worse it's true I am used to waking up ( or not even sleeping) before 2am or 3 am conference calls so I find the broken night thing ok.

All, I am having a big stress about the bottle and my return to work and because of the type of person I am ( control freak) I need a plan!

I am mainly worried about too much formula as LO sees to have digestive issues ( lots of cramps and wind) which seem worse after the bottle ( could just be air) and crampy poos.

Ideally I would feed her for another month ( til 4 months) then get her to take more bottles until she is completely bottle fed by 6 months. But I am worried ( mainly by what I goggle) that if I leave it too long she may not take the bottle and then I will have a problem.

I can get her to take a bottle for her split feed at 5.30 pm ( about 3 or 4 ounces) before the bath and then I breast feed her. I have less milk at this time and it works ok if I sit on the swing on the garden and feed her.

How are the rest of you going with combination feeding?

My issue is even though she will be 7 months when I go back I can't guarantee I can be home every night to feed her ( I know bad mummy) so the idea that I feed her am and pm doesn't work. Am I worrying much to early over something? Any ideas? Other than longer mat leave!

Eigmum Wed 05-Jun-13 09:03:18

pud I have no idea how you started the thread but well done.

StormyBrid Wed 05-Jun-13 10:14:30

Eig you find your way to the postnatal clubs section, then find where it says "start new thread". Not too difficult really, once you find the right place!

Sleeping layers here: we've recently been going with vest, swaddle pod, and thin crocheted blanket over the top. the swaddle pod's very thin material so is more like a layer of clothes than a blanket. DD seems fine with it. Last night wasn't so warm though, so we went for a sleepsuit too. I've given up worrying about the temperature in there. It's enough of a victory that I've managed to persuade the man that we don't need the heating on (because I'm sick of waking up drenched in sweat).

Milk-wise, we had the best day ever yesterday. 29.5 ounces! She'd passed twenty by the time she went to bed! That's never happened before. Still woke for a feed at 2am, but then slept through until just before 7, which is an improvement on recent days, when she's had 11pm dream feed, woken at 2, and woken again somewhere between 5 and 6. Hoping this eating lots thing will last, and then sleeping through might start happening again.

Needles today. Not entirely looking forward to that...

Eigmum Wed 05-Jun-13 10:35:45

Ah ok. Great news on the milk intake stormy. Jabs were fine yesterday, much the same!

Eigmum Wed 05-Jun-13 10:37:31

Another weaning tip, Annabel has an iPhone app for 3.99, cheaper than book and has all the same routines for introducing and the recipes!

vjhist85 Wed 05-Jun-13 12:22:12

Might be worth checking out this link for guidance on what to wear with gro-bags etc

KFFOREVER Wed 05-Jun-13 13:45:04

Well done mini stormy on the feeding. We had our jabs done this morning. I thought i would get there early so we can leave early. Clinic starts at 9.30am but at 9am there were 5 people already there.

I also like to have a bit of a nosy at the other pushchairs. Saw some nice ones havent a clue what they are called though.

eig if i was in your position i would start to introduce a bottle from now. Ive also heard the longer you leave it the harder it will be for babies to take a bottle.

pud - Ah, so that's what kit is all about. Spot the lady with no job hence no maternity leave knowledge.

We've already got the back carrier and are impatiently waiting for dd to be big enough for us to be able to use it! Yomping is what family worse do best grin

Eig - yup, get her used to a bottle asap as the longer you leave it the harder it will get. Mini-worse was a right little madam about it to start with, although we are 99% there now. Dr Brown's are for some reason preferred by a few babies I've come across who've started late, and medela is also good if you want to switch from boob to bottle and back. The medela calma teat works in the same way as the breast i.e. milk only flows when the baby makes a vacuum with their tongue and sucks.

You can get both from Boots on-line. I don't know about London stores, but out here in the sticks nowhere stocks either of those.

Re switching over to formula I'd recommend you start a couple of months before you go back so that you can do so very gradually. I have dd on two bottles now, started on one, and will put her on three in another week or so.

Have you thought about expressing so that you can give her some bm in a bottle? It would get her used to a bottle more quickly without over doing the formula.

When you start to wind down your milk you will get a little uncomfortable, and it is tempting to put the baby on both boobs to take some of the pressure off. Don't, express off and bin some of the watery fore milk first to make sure your dd has a balanced feed. I didn't do this to start with, and the excess lactose caused some very explosive watery green nappies. Not pleasant for either of us.

I'm wanting to get my body used to making less milk, so often express half a feed, and mix with formula, or give dd half a bottle and then swap her back onto me. That works really well.

Formula is much harder to digest, so there is an adjustment period, and formula nappies are really disgusting if you are used to bm ones.

plonko Wed 05-Jun-13 14:39:25

Eco the lambs are lovely aren't they? Dp found it hilarious that I gave birth in lambing season. Sadly I'm on a crappy housing estate, not the middle of a field, but one of my neighbours is a horse. I love that DS will grow up in the countryside.

Stormy awesome feeding! That's just about four oz shy of what my greedy little boy has, and I believe it's about the right amount for the age (according to silly formula box). How were your jabs?

DS did not take this lot so well. He's sleeping on me now having just had his first ever dose of calpol. He was charming the nurse, smiling and babbling away at her right until she stuck him. Needless to say I went shopping for moussaka and wine afterwards to make myself feel better.

On warm nights we tend to just have a vest and sleep suit on, theni put a knitted blanket over him when I go to bed. Our room was 23 degrees last night so I was loathe to even put the sleep suit on.

StormyBrid Wed 05-Jun-13 18:07:52

Jabs were okay. The nurse recognised me; he did my whooping cough jab. Screaming stopped as soon as the dummy went in. Grumpy as hell when we got home - she threw up the 4.30 feed (all five ounces!) just before we went, and was due a nap at 5. Appointment was at ten past. She's now sleeping on me, and I'm rocking her by way of sitting on the birthing ball. Time for calpol, bath, milk and bed soon.

It's a bugger she threw up the 4.30 feed. Would've been on 20 ounces so far for the day if that one had stayed down. With hindsight, two five ounce bottles two and a half hours apart is probably a bit much for her.

You mentioned Matlock, plonko, is that where you are? If so, we'll have to meet up for tea and cake when we visit the man's mother - she's about ten miles from there.

plonko Wed 05-Jun-13 18:39:00

I'm about 10 miles out of Matlock... Could I be your DP's DM's neighbour? grin

Our daytime bottles are 3-4 hours apart, otherwise I end up wearing it.

ecofreckle Wed 05-Jun-13 19:10:41

pud and soyo how were your working days?
zig not sure about hay fever in babies but dd does sneeze when outside (which is quite often poor lamb), we use the saline drops (presume they're harmless) and she brings up lovely boogers for us in return.
plonko we are taking dd for first swim tomorrow. We heard romiley pool has a separate warm baby pool open half ten til four. Do you know of anywhere nearer you? If so (and your lo ok post jabs) we could hook up.
You'll like this worse: today we took dd to her first summit :-) admittedly only around 600 metres but even so! The aged ramblers loved seeing dd in the baby Bjorn. We were walking for about five hours. We had stops to pop her on blanket for kick around time and feeds and she was really happy all day. But the weather was perfect. Warm but no direct run. Dry. So we'll try again with a more serious walk. Meanwhile we're all knackered...
But the big news is. Dd took a BOTTLE! Took dh forty mins to get one and half ounces down, but second attempt she took one ounce in five mins! Hurrah! I expressed four ounces in celebration and hope dh can do a proper whole feed soon. Sleep ahoy! But I'll miss the cuddles and quiet time. Contrary swine me.

SoYo Wed 05-Jun-13 19:37:15

Hi all

Work thing was a tad stressful but it was good to know my brain still works. It was a long & boring day for LO though so need to make it up to her tomorrow!

Eig & Pud I was hoping to do some KIT days but life with the mini bottle refuser means I won't be for a while, unless they let me in with the baby bjorn! I asked DH a few weeks ago to take over trying with the bottle & he never has so I've decided to leave it until weaning to do battle as I'm not back at work until February supposedly.

Eco well done on the bottle.

Stormy MiniYo was grotty after jabs yesterday but normal madam-like self today!

Right I've now completely lost track of who else to name check so sorry if I've missed anything vital.

After a long day DH is at a work do until 11ish depending on how shitfaced he gets so it's battle with bedtime, dog walking, transfer fails etc in a bit plus a glamorous dinner of toast and toast!

plonko Wed 05-Jun-13 20:28:26

SoYo glad to hear your day went well. You've got me thinking that I should put in my application for flexible working ASAP. Hope you have a nice relaxing day tomorrow.

Eco is that romiley as in near Stockport? That's quite far from me, so it's up to you how far you want to travel with your LO after swimming. I don't know that part if the peaks at all, my knowledge is mostly Buxton, bakewell, Ashbourne kind of way (I'm not native to these parts and moved here recently ish for work). Let me know what you fancy and I'll try to meet you - it can take a fair while to do a short journey through those hills. Well done on the climb though, sounds lovely!

Eigmum Wed 05-Jun-13 21:58:32

Funny I hadn't thought of expressing for when I am not around as I didn't bother with the thrush as would have to bin. I think I am clear now so could dust off the express machine as that would mean bottle practice without more formula which seems to cause alot of wind and just got to find a time when she isn't eating to express!

Eigmum Wed 05-Jun-13 22:00:41

worse how many bottles do you do a day? Do you think 2 would be enough to have her used to it? So I could keep one at 5.30pm and maybe one at 10am as night feeds are easier with the breast, won't let dh miss out, he can do settling!

ecofreckle Thu 06-Jun-13 01:40:47

Early first feed tonight. It's pretty balmy here. No breeze at all, even with both windows open.
After this feed I'm off to spare room and in theory dh is doing next feed from the bottle. Fx.
When your baby starts going for longer stretches at night does your milk supply just change too, giving you three hourly during day and whatever your baby needs overnight? The (rare) nights where dd goes til half three/four my boobs are so uncomfortable. Guess when a pattern emerges nature just does it's thing? Clever.
Not seen leni on this new thread. Hope all is well.
Hope it's all quiet on here because your babes are too

ecofreckle Thu 06-Jun-13 02:12:26

Oh and plonko I just googled bakewell pool as it looks to be half way between us and it has no warm baby pool so it looks like I'll miss you this time :-( as it's dd's first swim I'm cautious about chilly normal pools. Probably being a wuss. Anyone else taken their babes to a pool yet? Any tips? Will be nice to have dh with me too.

Mummabubbles Thu 06-Jun-13 03:35:35

Morning all, can I join in?? March baby here too.
Just having lovely snuffly feed, last night dd slept for 9 hours and I had to wake her to feed as I was in so much pain!! Needless to say I'm no longer praying for her to sleep through! One night time feed is my new hope - until we stop breastfeeding smile

KFFOREVER Thu 06-Jun-13 03:53:21

Morning all. Its feeding time again. Im sooooo tired. I would do anything to have a decent kip. We collected dmil from the airport and came back way past my bedtime. Lets see how it will be. Her being here will either improve things between me and dh or drive us further apart.

mumma - welcome. When was your dd born? 9hrs. Wow. I want that.

Im too tired to remember who did kit days. I think its a great idea to gauge whether you are ready to go back to work or not and you get paid. I always thought i would not want to go back to work but for my sanity i do. Although i will miss ds terribly. We have yet to spend time apart.

Anypants Thu 06-Jun-13 04:32:32

Hello <waves in a friendly but shy manner>
Can I join in?
I have a KIT day coming up on Monday and i'm starting to panic slightly. Not spent more than two hours away from DD.

pudtat Thu 06-Jun-13 05:18:00

Hello new people!

I had my first KIT day yesterday. Was strange as in some ways everything was so familiar I slipped right back in as if I'd never been away and could (almost) forget how different life is now. On the other hand, feeling my let down kick off regularly was a quick reminder if I needed it! Had to take my pump in and it was weird to see how much even I could pump when I wasn't feeding him - easily over 2oz a time. (I appreciate some of you ladies could accidentally spray that over your breakfast cereal grin). Still it means that I have a decent haul which I am going to use to get DH to do Friday night so I can try and get some proper sleep. I figure if needs be and I get really uncomfy I might wake to pump as that'll still be quicker than DS. I am just desperate for a stretch of sleep longer than 2.5hrs (my pb since Friday). While doing the 3houly cycle in hospital was hard as he wouldn't really wake up to feed, it was long enough to totally disrupt his sleep at terns and now I can't get him to go longer than 3.5hrs at night. I have been aiming for 4 but can't get close at the moment. confused

plonko Thu 06-Jun-13 06:19:53

No worries Eco, enjoy your swim - it sounds lovely.

DS has been asleep since 7pm and I've been lying here awake since 5 expecting to have to get up to feed him at any moment. Thank god I'm not bfing or I'd have knockers like boulders! So glad he's staying asleep so long, but that could be down to the jabs. He's beginning to make elephant noises though..,

Hello new people wine?

Glad to hear it went well Pud

Mummabubbles Thu 06-Jun-13 07:14:14

Seems like baby agreed with my once a night feed theory-lets hope it continues.......

FOREVER, she was born on 23rd. We had quite a scary time. Due to her size she nearly didn't arrive safely.
But we both recovered well and she's perfect!! Very content and happy ( as long as her tummy's full!) smile

Well, looks like I've got my come-uppance as after telling everyone about the smallest person's obliging tendency to sleep through until after 7am she's regressed to wanting a 3.30am feed. Huge sigh. Last night it was a farts thing, the night before a temperature thing, and I'm kind of guessing pretty soon it'll be a teething thing. I'd better dust off my dark glasses and air of resignation and just roll with it I guess.

Eig - two bottles a day should be fine for getting mini-eig accustomed to them. That's what we're on here, and she's moved from not even considering the idea of anything so alien as a silicon teat, to possibly even preferring them. Au nature wins hands down when she's a bit teary, but if she's just hungry she quite likes the rather faster bottle option.

Expressing when you are still bf-ing is hard to fit in. An obvious time is when your DH is giving her a bottle (although admittedly that does seem a little weird).

Vaccs today, which I am not looking forward to. I'm still trying to work out how to get her there given her absolute refusal to have anything to do with the baby carrier in hot weather. I can't take the pram as the surgery can't accommodate them (it's tiny... really tiny) and I'm loathe to leave it outside in case it gets pinched. Driving would be a bit pointless as the school kids use all the parking. Hmmm, I suspect I'll have to go with the carrier and carry her on my shoulder if she kicks off. That'll be fun.

Big 'Hi' to Any and Mamma

KFFOREVER Thu 06-Jun-13 09:00:10

Hi to any too.

Well ds is still asleep. Hes wake up time is usually 6.30ish. He did start stirring but admittedly i gave him a dummy and went back to sleep.

mumma im glad you are both well.

wors- lo waking up by their own farts is funny but annoying. Thats a good story to tell our lo's when they are older.

Dh seems to have a few days off work. So we will probs be out and about enjoying the sunshine. So i may not be here as much. Another problem i have with ds is the car seat. Everytime we stop at traffic lights he starts crying. He lifts himself up and looks at you with those gorgeous eyes saying 'pick me up'. On a positive note he rolled from his tummy on to his back yesterday. Yay.

leniwhite Thu 06-Jun-13 09:21:25

I'm here! Househunting renders me knackered when I usually post...

Found a beautiful 3 bed in Greenwich but we've never owned before so deciding is hard shockseems almost a bigger commitment than having DS! One huge pro point is the baby weighing clinic on the doorstep though.

Hello new people grin

somethingbeginningwith Thu 06-Jun-13 09:22:35

Hello! Can I join in too? March 15th DS here weighing a dainty 9lb 13oz! We've got 2nd jabs tomorrow, not looking forward to that. Praying it doesn't interfere with his wonderful tendency to sleep 8pm-8am!

Plonko, did I read that you're from near Matlock? I'm Derby based. The amount of times I've taken DS to Matlock Bath just for something to do is ridiculous!

Hope you're all having lovely mornings smile

plonko Thu 06-Jun-13 09:44:50

Something hello! I say Matlock because its the nearest big town...and if you come from Derby you'll almost certainly drive past me on your way to the seaside Matlock Bath. I'm thinking of taking DS to Lea later for a wander when it brightens up. Are you city based then?

Ooh Leni are you going to put an offer in? Sounds lovely.

To my shame I've only just woken up. DS fed 6.45-7.10, by which point I'd been awake for two hours expecting a to have to feed him. I'm staaaaarving. Quite tempted to have a fry up!

Eigmum Thu 06-Jun-13 10:44:55

plonko I had a fry up and it was great!

Eigmum Thu 06-Jun-13 10:53:11

Welcome newbies!

SoYo Thu 06-Jun-13 14:25:46

Right, who let in all these people with babies that sleep wink

Madam was awake every 2hrs until 5 then every 30min in our bed punching my boob & kicking me until 9. Very restful!

Beautiful morning here in Yorkshire. We've been for a walk with pram, pup & a friend & her dogs then madam has had a mega stroppy screamy fit because she was tired, queue laps of the driveway in her pram & now snoozing in pram in the shade while I indulge in a little light sunbathing. Lovely!

leniwhite Thu 06-Jun-13 14:46:42

The boob punching... What sort of evolutionary strategy is that eh?!

Do all babies do that funny triple sniff in their sleep or just mine? He also tries to lick the air when he's in the buggy like a dog shock

Can't decide whether to put in an offer on the flat but there's another couple due to look round on saturday and decide then and there - they've done all the checks etc so we have to decide and put a reservation on tomorrow if we want it. Argh! Surely only grown ups can buy flats??


somethingbeginningwith Thu 06-Jun-13 17:28:29

plonko I work in the city but I'm a countryside-dweller born and bred. Live in a small village in Derby. Been to Buxton a few times too as I run a theatre company and we've had shows at the Opera House. What's Lea like? I've never been. Heard it's beautiful. In fact, just convinced DP that we should go soon as he's been before.

leni we're in the process of buying too. Such a stressful time but very exciting too. Fx you find somewhere perfect for your family.

Lovely sunny day here so we've made the most of playing in the garden and perhaps a little indoor time to watch Magic Mike. Shameless

vjhist85 Thu 06-Jun-13 18:00:31

Hello newer-than-me-people. Nice not to be the newest!
I know it's all I ever talk about, but this napping malarkey is beyond a joke now! Today's sleeps: 9-9.30, 12-12.30, 4.30-4.45. That's it. She is now a screaming mess, and I'm not far behind. My fallback position is rocking or on my chest, but I'm really worried that she'll get used to that and the half decent nighttime sleeping we're getting will be destroyed. It's no longer a case of extending naps, it's starting them in the first place! Arrggghhh!

ecofreckle Thu 06-Jun-13 19:31:22

Welcome something, any and mumma and congratulations on your new ish arrivals!
vj how old is your babe? I ask as I have something to say re naps.

leni having a baby is much more grown up than buying a house. You can sell a house. They're not a forever thing so dive in I say.
First swim was fun. No tears. But lifeguard objected to poolside feeding.
Not many naps today for dd so she's currently crying post bath in that way yours does stormy: how dare you clothe me!?
Better dash.

vjhist85 Thu 06-Jun-13 20:07:05

Eco- dd is 13 weeks (but was 3 weeks early) I am all ears!!!

What did the lifeguard say about feeding? Hope you quoted the law at him?
We go swimming once a week and dd loves it. Right little water baby on my hands, no surprise as I'm a swimmer, spent most of my pregnancy in the bath (or so it felt at the time thanks to severe spd) and had a water birth!

ecofreckle Thu 06-Jun-13 20:59:34

'you'd be better off in the changing room, there's people (gesturing to heavy set tattooed gentlemen having lovely time in pool with their kids and who'd clearly seen the upper part of a boob before) around'. Sigh.
We too did lots of pregnant swimming, too many baths and had water birth. Maybe that's why our los love the pool indeed!
My dd is ten weeks but was three late (I went to term plus 20!) so maybe they're similar when judged on due date? Anyhow, we have had the daily nap battle too but last few days we've put her down expecting the standard thirty mins and we've had 45-60 instead. We didn't change our tactic. Maybe it's a natural progression as they get a tiny bit older? So, sorry, no wisdom but maybe light at end of tunnel :-)

vjhist85 Thu 06-Jun-13 21:07:28

Edd was 26th march, but she arrived rather speedily on the 7th! I think I need to persevere, I've been a bit defeatist and now often don't even put her down for a nap, instead just put her in her bouncy chair or on me, both of which used to be sure fire but are becoming less so. Need to be less lazy and be prepared to keep going back up and down those stairs! Silly attitude really.

Think I'm going to introduce another regular ff, already do one at 10pm but with kit days coming up I want to make sure she's happy to take a bottle when she's wide awake in the day and not just fast asleep! Any tips from anyone on which daytime feed is the best one to swap? We are currently (very roughly!) 7,10,1,4,7.

vjhist85 Thu 06-Jun-13 21:08:58

Oh and re: lifeguard, what an arsehole! I like to think I'd give him what for. In reality I'd probably meekly disappear (and then complain wuss that I am

KFFOREVER Thu 06-Jun-13 22:08:50

Hi something 8am-8pm? Is that for real?

vj i would try a feed time of when she will be definitely be feeding ff while you are at work.

eco what an idiot. You should have continued to feed at the poolside. At the end of the day there is not much he can do.

leni good luck on the housebuying. Exciting times.

ecofreckle Thu 06-Jun-13 22:44:04

vj they must have mixed our dates up, I was due on 5th, arrived 25th :-) almost opposite. With regards the nap thing I realised after a while that the initial or after just a minute of crying was actually part of dd's process for going to sleep. It's a whinge more than a cry and I now wait before going in. Invariably it's brief and she drifts off shortly afterwards.
Wasn't it a lovely long light evening. We sat out for ages.

leniwhite Fri 07-Jun-13 06:06:49

Bless DS, after a grumbly evening post-jabs (my heart almost broke but I stopped myself from punching the nurse at least when she stuck those needles in his perfect little thighs) he slept from 9-4 so not the chaos I'd envisaged.

Shame I'm too worried about this flat buying dilemma to sleep!

Wwyd -

option 1 - buy a 3 bed shared ownership flat with big open plan kitchen/lounge in a big but brand new development (big balcony, underfloor heating, triple glazing) on a main road with no garden or parking but 5 mins from Greenwich Park and only 12 mins to work for me instead of 1.5 hrs. Comes with all white goods and very secure and quiet inside but main door opens on to a busy road (flat's at the back and you can't hear it from there). We'd only own half.

Option 2 - buy a 2 bed flat with separate kitchen in a purpose built dated block (exactly like we're in now) that needs updating and is above budget anyway, in Beckenham so slightly longer to work, but big communal garden, parking and possible neighbourly vibe like we have here. We'd own it all but pay roughly the same as option 1 because it's a bit cheaper.

We have to decide today without having seen option 2, because they can't show us any similar until tomorrow. I feel my head may explode!

Neither are the area I want but at least I know I like Greenwich whereas I've not been to Beckenham although the stats are basically the same.

I love where we currently live but our lease is almost up, we can't afford to buy here and the rent is twice what either of the above options would cost us per month, which is why we have to move even though ideally we'd love to stay.

Is there a 'make this decision for me because I'm incapable' thread?!

Thoughts ladies? confused

Morning all - another one here with vaccs yesterday, and Leni, I'm with you.... had to restrain myself from snatching the worselet away and running off. It just feels wrong, to stick a needle in a baby. She wasn't happy, screamed and SCREAMED in outrage at the nurse, and me, and the world in general which didn't go down too well with the less baby friendly members of the waiting room posse. Having to wait around for 10 minutes afterwards, just in case, can be an ear splitting experience.

Leni - can't choose the flat for you, but one thing I would say is check out the service charges. New build places can have stonking great monthly service charges, and some older places have insufficient funds in the coffers so whack a massive bill on you for major works. Look at when the block was last over-hauled (painting, windows, electrics etc), ask about when the next major works are planned. We own an ex-council place in London, and in the last 3 years have been billed £22,000 (that is not a typo... I really do mean £22k) for various major works. Also check carefully that the vendor is up to date with service charge payments. If they aren't you may become liable.

Something you get 12 hours sleep every night? Wow? What are you feeding? Whiskey wink? The tiddler only slept until 5am again this morning, but I'll let her off this time. The vacc zonked her out to the point that she fell asleep after 3 swallows of her evening feed, hence went to bed on an empty stomach. I was expecting her to wake about midnight, so 5am was a pleasant surprise.

Another very sunny day here. I feel like a right old misery guts, but in all honesty I'd rather it cooled down a bit!

pudtat Fri 07-Jun-13 07:27:54

Leni, do I sense a morning in Beckenham checking out the vibe and at least doing a 'drive by'?

pudtat Fri 07-Jun-13 07:34:53

Well in a desperate bid to get more sleep I did a bottle dream feed and it worked! That meant he went 10.30 to 2.30 before needing another feed. Yay! of course i needed the loo after 3 hrs. My boobs were busting at this point, so I was disappointed that I could only get him to do one side and ended up going and pumping the other one so that's another 2.5oz in the freezer at least. He's then gone for another 4 hrs, although I only got 2 and a bit, but still feel better for it. May even have another snooze when he's finished now...

somethingbeginningwith Fri 07-Jun-13 08:10:37

12 hours really is for real. I'm just as shocked and go to bed every night thinking that he won't do it again but he seems to really love his sleep. Takes after his mummy grin from 8 weeks it was 9 hours and now at 12 weeks it's been 12 hours for the past week. He's a thumb-sucker so I think he soothes himself back to sleep when he wakes up. And only the smallest drop of whiskey wink

leni with regards to the house, a drive through as pud suggests is a great idea. We looked at a similar scheme to yours with part ownership but decided against it as we wanted the security of something that was all ours so instead went for a less snazzy looking house and chose one that we could put our own stamp on as a cosy family house. even though the snazzy looking house was simply beautiful Whatever you pick has to be right for you though

Jabs today. Sob. Hopefully an afternoon with his wonderfully crazy 91 year old great great uncle will take his mind off it. And mine.

SoYo Fri 07-Jun-13 08:39:14

I think I have officially made the transition to zombie.

Bed at 8.30, up at 9.30/12/2/5 then every 20-30mins until I gave in. What a bloody nightmare!

Today I have friends coming for coffee, need to pack for holiday tomorrow & need to figure out how to get some rest before the 7hr drive that supposedly commences at 5am. Grr.

KFFOREVER Fri 07-Jun-13 09:52:11

Ds went bed at 10 woke at 2.30 then 5.30. After that he couldnt sleep with all the farts.

leni i know both areas well and live really close to beckenham. I must say i prefer beckenham. You will be out of london but still close enough. Now greenwich is a royal borough wouldnt it be very expensive to live ie council tax? Greenwich park is nice though and i would be tempted to live in a brand new apartment. Sorry im not that much help.

leniwhite Fri 07-Jun-13 10:38:02

I feel like a zombie too - had a sneaky 7.30am to now snooze!

Hmmm that's really useful input; we don't have a car so a drive through is a bit more of a faff, but possibly worth it. I'm torn because the vibe of this place seems very much based on my lovely neighbours and we've had major works done here so I can see how that could be an issue. Plus we're only planning on staying up to when DS is school age so it wouldn't be worth shelling out to us. The service charge on the shared ownership place is all part of the rent so no hidden costs there.

I'm indecisive at the best of times but this just seems like an insurmountable one - no amount of sleeping on it has helped!

Eigmum Fri 07-Jun-13 12:12:05

Who let these people with sleeping babie in!! Just jealous, up at 11.30 and 3.30 and then 7.30, can't complain. Irony is I have finally got the hang of the breastfeeding, tempted to keep it up and delay return to work!! Controversial. I know she probably won't sleep through til solids on that basis but I am ok with that!

pudtat Fri 07-Jun-13 20:05:44

So... How'd you get on Leni?

Eigmum Fri 07-Jun-13 22:01:34

Yes! What's the decision leni or are you all asleep with fabulous babies!! We are asleep here but planning to dream feed at 11pm.... Although likely dd has other plans.

WingDefence Fri 07-Jun-13 22:52:34

KF, that's scary - Beckenham is where we moved from two years ago when we came opp north!

leni, it's a fab place to bring up children. Far too much to tell you about as I'm typing one-thumbed on my phone bit feel free to PM me and ask me any questions about shops, schools, which are the good and bad streets etc!

pudtat Sat 08-Jun-13 02:14:18

Gosh it's quiet round here at the mo. hope it's because everyone has babies that sleep through, boobs which don't leak and go so hard they prevent you rolling over get uncomfy, and are having lovely days out in the sunshine.

Talking of the sun, what are you all doing about LO's out in it? I have been keeping him in the shade under his uv covers, but I genuinely worry more when he's in the sling - seems harder to protect his face though he has a hat and I bought another really cute one yesterday. Should I put him in sunscreen? Are any safe when they're this little?

WingDefence Sat 08-Jun-13 02:28:29

I'm here sad

DD still faces into the sling wester's body so the hat has been enough to cover her face, sometimes with a muslin on top. But I think a little children's would probably be fine. Test it on a bit of skin first?

DD has created a new sleeping issue out of thin air. The past few nights she's awoken around now desperately trying to find her thumb (which she's just discovered in the same time) but failing to unclench it from her little fist so ends up crying and waking up. It's most frustrating! Last Friday night she went her longest (11-6) but the past few nights hasn't made it past 2:30 sad

Any ideas?! hmm

WingDefence Sat 08-Jun-13 02:29:11

*a little children's sunscreen should be fine

KFFOREVER Sat 08-Jun-13 02:30:26

Aggghh. ds was moving around. I thought i would get one step ahead and make a bottle before he fully wakes. Turns out he had wind. Hes now fast asleep again.

wing seems we can make another thread here just for beckenham. I agree with you about it being a fab place to bring up children.

pud - i deserve bad mummy points for forgetting ds's hat on occassions but i keep him in the shade most of the time.

SoYo Sat 08-Jun-13 02:55:13

Pud, MiniYo mostly stays in the shade but we were out in the garden all day yesterday so I slathered her in kids factor 50, put her in a hat that's far too big & fed her a million small feeds to stop her getting dry.

She's still gt a stinky cold so it's like sleeping next to Darth Vadar but karvol capsules & tilting her crib seem to have helped a bit tonight.

We're leaving for holiday in 3hrs. Is it likely ill get any more sleep???

KFFOREVER Sat 08-Jun-13 03:06:32

wing cant you just give her a dummy when she is rooting atound for her thumb? I know not many people agree with a dummy but its been my lifesaver.

So 3 days of mil being here. My home sweet home is a mess. Seems dh gets his messyness from his dm. Also im begining to realise just how much ive learnt ds's ways and im trying to teach her his likes and dislikes.

Eigmum Sat 08-Jun-13 07:29:18

soyo enjoy your holiday! Hope you got a little sleep.

wingd we keep the scratch mitts on that are part if sleepsuit or cover her hands with soft gap socks( so much better than crappy mitts that fall off) and find dd like to suck on that or have material close to face? We don't gave a dummy here either and isn't a great need to introduce now only to take away again and have the same finding it problem!

We have never managed a big stretch like 11 to 6. Madam would drop 11pm feed but I want her to drop 3am. She is still asleep now which is a sign she doesn't need 3am feed so going to start trying to resettle her without food later this week.

stormy and other 8 marchers, we have officially made it til 3 months yeah! My memory is it all gets so much better from here and already is here ( minus the 3am problem!)

Morning all. Guess what - another broken night here!!! Looks like the worselet's sleeping through phase was just that... a phase. Damn! She's an unhappy little bag of wind and farts again. Any advice anyone, other than baths, massage, and cycling her legs?

I'm on the edge of my seat Leni - what was the verdict? Hope you've found somewhere perfect smile

KFF what is this dummy magic of which you speak? I've tried a dummy with dd - she spits it out. I've even tired a variety of shapes of dummy - she spits them all out. In fact she will chew almost anything except a dummy. Most bizarre. No advice on the thumbs issue Wing, but I imagine she will with time start to remember where thumbs are kept.

Happy holidays SoYo - hope you get to relax and catch up on sleep.

Pud - The whole hot weather things has been a bit of a nightmare for me tbh, and despite my best efforts dd appears to have developed a tan. I'm telling myself the vitamin D will have done her good, but I rather suspect the rest of the world will be pinning me as a 'bad mother'. It's the sling that is the problem, as the hood of the pram comes right down over her head and shades all but her toes. Not tried suncream yet as my only foray into strange unguents (baby shampoo.... thanks MIL) resulted in a very sore head and a nasty case of cradle cap. Warm water and cotton wool is all that gets near pfb dd now. Yesterday I spent the day walking around with a copy of the FT shading her head. One likes to start the lo's education young <snort>

Eigmum Sat 08-Jun-13 07:43:37

Ha ha worse on the FT!

I am with you on the little bit of vit D is good for them! We also use nothing but water on dd so won't be starting sun cream just yet. Keep them mainly shaded I say but a bit of sun won't hurt!

somethingbeginningwith Sat 08-Jun-13 08:14:56

We had a busy day yesterday. Jabs in the morning which resulted in that horrible little squeal that just breaks hearts but that seems to be the only reaction so far other than having a clingy baby most of the evening which I secretly loved. Then off for a pub lunch where DM kidnapped DS for a while and refused to give him to anyone else, even when she was eating. Then friends round for a night of fajitas and cupcakes where DS fell asleep in an old school friend's arms much to her delight and her OH's ever so worried face which just screamed 'not yet not yet not yet'! Even the poonami before bathtime didn't scare her off.

pud I put DS in children's factor 50 sensitive Nivea suncream and it seems to be fine. He stays in the shade as much as possible and then we go inside, when we can, for a bit of time in front of the fan which he thinks is hilarious. Also, what is it about babies in shorts that just screams cuteness??

wing sucking on his fists and sleeves was how DS started with his thumb sucking and now we need to use a jack to prise it from his mouth. He sucks his left thumb and his right wrist, never anything else or the other way round. I wonder what went through his mind to decide that.

Hope it's lovely and sunny for everyone today and there are lots of smiley, happy babies and mummies!

KFFOREVER Sat 08-Jun-13 08:51:22

Worc- i had to use an enormous cherry teat dummy. I found when he wants a dummy he will suck on it for dear life but if he wants his fist he is determined to suck on his fist. So actually wing ignore my advice i was half asleep smile.

StormyBrid Sat 08-Jun-13 09:44:28

Our main plan for avoiding sunshine is not walking south around lunchtime. The downside to a second hand buggy is the parasol and rain cover vanished long ago. DD does have a very cute little sunhat though.

Eig does napping improve from three months? I really, really hope it does.

Still no more sleeping through the night here. But we've been doing dream feeds at 10 and 1, just to make sure she's got enough milk in her, and that makes her sleep until somewhere between six and seven in the morning. My usual trick of breakfast in bed and a firm "It's still night time, chicken, go back to sleep" is becoming less successful though. Getting up to half an hour of chattering to herself before she goes back to sleep. And this morning I was woken at 8.15 by " hic-oooh! hic-aaah!"

Anyone else invested in one of those doorway bouncer thingies? We got one yesterday, DD loves it. As do my arms. She's all about the standing up these days. And yesterday saw the first ever roll! From back to side!

As for that Wonder Weeks book... anyone else keep forgetting the list of upcoming skills has them at the earliest point they might appear, and so thinking their baby is a bit slow for not doing them all yet?

StormyBrid Sat 08-Jun-13 10:03:40

Meanwhile, my hippy babywearing cloth nappy friend is having a busy week. Baby turned one, went back to work, and announced pregnancy number three. And it's making me broody. How can I want another already?

Eigmum Sat 08-Jun-13 11:44:23

stormy my experience was yes it does as baby more active at awake time, door bouncers great so really needs the nap. We are blackout blinds and in cot though if we want a proper 2 hour nap at lunch. Any slacking from mummy the light or venue and we'll only sleep 45 mins!

StormyBrid Sat 08-Jun-13 13:00:57

We managed a good nap earlier - woke up and squeaked a bit after forty five minutes, then actually went back to sleep! Went down again fifteen minutes ago after a good bounce, hopefully she'll stay down until the next feed.

The man has just agreed we can have another baby if I get him a Ferrari. Anyone got a few hundred grand spare?

Stormy here's your answer

It's not like he specified the exact model is it.... grin

Actually scrap that, I've just read the prices on there shock...!!!!! They're toys FFS.

Rainbowbabyhope Sat 08-Jun-13 15:57:26

We use Mam dummies which are brilliant although DD was born wanting to suckle everything in sight. As for more babies...shudder....love both my DDs to bits but don't know how anyone who goes through it once would want to do it again!

Rainbowbabyhope Sat 08-Jun-13 17:02:39

stormy what door bouncer did you get? Didn't realise they could be used at such a young age! Would be fantastic if possible to use already as DD is nosy and likes to be sitting up and looking aroung. Ideally she also likes to be as high up as possible too - think it comes from being transported almost exclusively in sling since birth which made her neck muscles strong quite quickly and she just wants to constantly look around which can be difficult for me to facilitate all day long!

leniwhite Sat 08-Jun-13 17:56:33

My brain is broken.

We had a second viewing of the Greenwich brand new place and it's so light and lovely... Loads of room for entertaining and 3 bedrooms so room to work from home etc.

Then we went to Beckenham...

A maisonette on Abbey Park Rd, a private estate of sixties places with lots of green. Anyone know it?

A two up two down over 1st/2nd floor with own entrance, needs work and no open hallways or third bedroom, but could have a cat and the town centre is lovely. Really cute house with big windows and we could add value, plus we'd own it all.

I'm so torn still, worse having seen it!
I can see myself in the new one so easily as I tend to find the crumbly old dated bits stifling in sixties builds, but in Beckenham there's less space but it's a little house! And very safe area with more green. There's less working room which may mean no teaching from home of DS/OH are home.

Ok i need a vote...


Rainbowbabyhope Sat 08-Jun-13 19:20:05

leni sounds likle a really tough choice. On the one hand I usually always prioritise my ability to earn income so would be inclined to go for space where I could work and also space that family could grow into but on the other hand I am dubious of share ownership schemes. Do you have a gut instinct about the houses? If not perhaps write of pros and cons list and decide which of factors is most important to you?

leniwhite Sat 08-Jun-13 22:16:11

Why dubious? I'm new to house buying so all input helpful!

This is our first ever bought place so only planning on staying until DS goes to school really. Not a family home as such.

My friend just threw eggs at Cowell on BGT!!!! shock

Leni - you need to draw up a pros and cons list for each, them sit down with your DH and go through what factors are most important to each of you. No one on here can tell you which is the right option for you, because we aren't you.

If it were me I'd go with the Beckenham place because I always prioritise location over space, ownership over part ownership, the potential to add value over right at the top of the price bracket already, and two storeys over one. Noisy neighbours above your head can be pretty hellish! If I remember correctly didn't you say the other place fronted onto a busy road? That would also put me off, especially given your ds will be at the mad running about age before you plan to move.

However, if you work from home, space and a swanky interior might be more important... Sooooo, no help really grin

But back to babies - for those of you going through the hand chewing phase, the answer is a gummee glove. It's fab. DD spent ages crackling the crackly patch and trying to shove the chewy bits in her mouth. She's not really big enough to properly chew it, but she gave it her best shot, and saved the skin on her hands from another evening of being slobbered on.

leniwhite Sun 09-Jun-13 05:13:05

Gummee glove sounds hilarious... Can you get grown up gloves made of haribo you can slowly eat? Now that I'd buy!

StormyBrid Sun 09-Jun-13 10:17:48

Rainbow we got this. It says three to fifteen months on the box; the main thing is they need to be able to support their head. DD is grand at that, since sitting down is for wusses and only wimps lie down - she's determined to be the Amazing Standing Baby at all times. A good sized doorway comes in handy too - we've a double width doorway with no door in it between living room and kitchen which is ideal.

leni I'd be inclined to go for the Beckenham one, mainly on the grounds that you'd own it yourself rather than sharing it (presumably with the bank? Which means you pay off the mortgage then have to take out another to buy the other half of it?).

worse I may have to invest in one of those gloves. It's getting hard to get the dummy in DD's mouth even when she's shouting for it, because her hands are always in the way.

Eigmum Sun 09-Jun-13 12:28:03

Why do some people always manage to annoy you and how can the competitive parent thing start so young. I've religiously (!) avoid this lady at church who constantly quizzes me about feeding and compares our babies. This morning her opening line on grabbing me is, gosh you can see a real difference in our girls now ( born a few days apart) mine is so much bigger than yours and holds her head up more. I praise myself for refraining from getting into a debt ( I wanted to say dd is in the 60th percentile blah blah blah), instead I made a oh right comment and moved on. But why is it you can't see some people without it seeming like they are unfavourably comparing your baby. My standard line ( unless its really obvious something is wrong) is " doesn't she or he look well!". Ok rant over I know I shouldn't care but I think especially with the feeding issues and illness I am super sensitive about dd.

Eig you're a better woman than me. I'd be tempted to make a a veiled comment that would leave her wondering if her precious dd wasn't just a tad overweight. But then I am evil, and don't much care who hates me grin

Stormy I did wonder if 10 quid wasn't a bit steep for what is basically a fancified teething ring, but based on how successful it has been I'd say it is probably worth it. Mini-worse is giving herself dish-pan hands from all the slobber, and that isn't a good look on a 3 month old. It isn't a good look on her ageing mother either, but at least I have an excuse other than I dribble.

That door thingummy looks like fun.... I'm tempted. However I may have to sit on my hands for now as the amount of baby paraphernalia that I am amassing is getting ridiculous. Doesn't help that MIL sends me a 'wee parcel' every week. She's the sweetest granny ever, and just can't keep out of baby stores. I'm kind of thinking my SILs need to hurry up and produce or the tiddler will become the ultimate spoilt brat.

Right, tis lunch which means thinking about what to feed large people and when to feed smaller ones. Complicated this family management lark isn't it.

Eigmum Sun 09-Jun-13 15:17:58

worse I was really tempted to say, well given how much bigger you are than me ... Must be genetic but stopped myself. Dh excelled himself by getting the gender wrong and saying gsh your boys got big when he came over to rescue me. Don't knw why it upset me, 5.8 kg at 12 weeks is a good size . I have been trying to get dd into a better routine, been reading "save our sleep"' it's got some good sense re daily naps etc..

StormyBrid Sun 09-Jun-13 15:31:22

Share the nap sense with us, Eig, we're all agog.

Seems alright to me commenting on size differences between babies (because, well, they do come in different sizes). But getting competitive about who's got the better head control? Presumably the woman hasn't got anything important to occupy herself with. I admit I quite like comparing babies, but not in a competitive way. It's just interesting seeing the different paths each baby takes to gaining full body control, as it were.

We are having a bit of a rubbish day today. DD's doing grand, but she is now down to one surviving great-grandparent. sad

leniwhite Sun 09-Jun-13 16:19:32

Stormy sorry to hear that hmm

The shared ownership means Family Mosaic own the other half, not the bank. Everything's guaranteed for 4 years and they're really easy to sell on. You can buy back 5% at a time if you want so it means we can afford three beds. Leaning more towards a bigger space for when DS starts rolling/crawling/spreading himself about! Then maybe graduating to a proper house in Beckenham when he's bigger and needs me home less (work further away from there). The one we saw needs all new windows and doors etc, complete repainting and removal of artex ceilings throughout and a new bathroom, and I'm not sure the value would even go up much as it's already pretty expensive. I don't know if I can be arsed for such a small space, but there's only smaller ones in our price range that don't need lots of work Hence my reservations... But still haven't properly decided. Feel a bit anxious and depressed about it actually because I want DS to be happy!

Had a bit of a ukelele experiment yesterday - DS laughs when I play to him so we held it up by his hands and he grasped the strings a bit making some notes, but then he got so excited he started going all aquiver and hyperventilating! Had to take it away again shock he's so easily over stimulated.

Anyone know about hungrier baby milk, i.e. when it's used and why etc?

StormyBrid Sun 09-Jun-13 16:23:34

The hungry baby milk just fills them up more, I think. I'd imagine it's denser? Likely to aggravate rather than improve any digestive issues though, I'm told.

Can I be nosy and ask what your price range is, leni? Mainly so I can be shocked and horrified - one gets a bit of a skewed idea of what houses cost living in Hull.

StormyBrid Sun 09-Jun-13 16:32:46

Just asked hippy friend, hungry baby milk has cereal in to fill them up more. Gets stuck in the teat a lot, and made her son constipated. It didn't improve his sleep, just made him wake up farting a lot.

Eigmum Sun 09-Jun-13 17:26:18

stormy you are right I am just sensitive and it was the way it was said, clearly too sensitive though... Who cares if her daughter is bigger and has better head control...

leni two of my teacher friends bought under shared ownership and they were both good buys that worked out well. Is the block all shared ownership or some mixed? Cn you buy the rest of the flat if you want to? What is the "rent" on the amount you don't own, can it be raised annually or is it linked purely to inflation? What is the service charge? If those things are ok then shared ownership can be a great way to get on the ladder. Ideally you want to be in a mixed block with the option to buy more and a rent that can't be moved up indiscriminately by a landlord. no idea about area though...

In my view hungry milk a very bad idea. I think it's about the amount of whey and casein in the milk. Breastmilk and first milk have more whey, hungry milk more harder to digest casein. Most people I know that are maternity nurses or the like say first milk is fine til babies need cows milk and that follow on milks and hungry baby milks are a bit of a con, they let formula companies get around advertising laws ( as unlike from birth milks) these can be advertised. So they can get brand recognition. Most common issue is constapation. Some people think they will help babies sleep through but I've not known it make any difference among my friends.

leniwhite Sun 09-Jun-13 17:58:57

Sounds, erm, pleasant! Might not bother then, just wondering how to graduate on from this endless morning boob feed.

£250K is our max. That has to include all fees etc. The Beckenham 2 up 2 down is on at £249,900 and would push us to the limit of our funds so we'd have to negotiate the price down considerably, but the shared ownership is worth £283K for an extra room and closer to town plus a much smaller mortgage.

I'm talking myself into it...! You ladies are all wiser than me - I'm always lurching from one bad decision to the next, although it wasn't actually my fault the last place I chose burned down confused

DS has become enamoured with the orange monkey from the jungle gym and he'll hold it's tail and grunt at it for ages, such a cutie. Poor leopard has fallen out of favour. Music definitely the most entertaining thing so far. Happy mummy!

He managed to throw OH's glasses across the room yesterday too which was highly amusing. They got flailed violently! Serves him right for making him wear them.

Right, after a huge nap I can hear poonami happening... Better go

somethingbeginningwith Sun 09-Jun-13 18:27:28

Gosh, London house prices are crazy aren't they? Although I adore London so can see why, but me and OH had our offer of less than £95k for a 4-bed semi with a loft conversion and a gorgeous garden accepted so we're very excited. It all seems so grown up and scary to be buying houses and having babies. leni you seem to be edging more towards the shared ownership. It sounds like you know which one you really, really want but you can see the benefits of the other one too. It's a tough decision!

We've got DS this He seems to love it. Lots of smiles and it means me and OH could get on with a full house clean. Plus, it's super cool!

Okay ladies, I have a dilemma. Basically, the dream is to be a writer. And after having one of my plays go on tour, it's going to be at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival this August for a week. The problem is...what do I do?! The options are
1. Go with my company to Edinburgh for a week leaving 6 month old DS with OH meaning I miss him constantly and struggle to do anything without thinking about how he is.
2. Go up to Edinburgh for just a couple of days and let my partner do most of the work. The problem here being that she's ever so ditzy and I'd worry about the show when I'm not there.
3. Not go at all and relinquish all control of my play and not see it at the Fringe, which has been a dream for so long and would be the only time I'll have one of my plays there.

I'm in such a pickle sad

Eigmum Sun 09-Jun-13 18:36:48

something I had to to Miami when ds1 was 9 months old. It was important for my job so OH took holiday and came too ... Is that an option? Very exciting ... You should go?

StormyBrid Sun 09-Jun-13 19:02:33

Well, if you fancy moving to Hull, leni, your quarter of a million could get you a five bedroom Victorian house in the poshest part of the city. There's even a six bed one within your budget. Very nice area too, and in the catchment of some good schools. Good big gardens too. And it's the pricier ones there that are £250k; a lot of them are going for around the £190k mark.

Dammit, I'm going to spend all evening looking at property porn now!

Scrunchy Cow from the baby gym has proved popular today, and even Random Cat got a smile, but Squeaky Bird just made her scream. No idea why...

leniwhite Sun 09-Jun-13 19:27:05

Amazing Something!!!

So house celebrations grin

I think you should try to work out a way to get your partner to deal with half the Edinburgh stuff in a more trustworthy way and go for the rest of it - it's your dream!

By 6 months your LO will be big enough to come with you if your DH goes too?

If you don't go you'll always wonder what if...

leniwhite Sun 09-Jun-13 19:31:41

Stormy it's nuts isn't it hmm

We aim to move out of London sometime before DS goes to secondary school

KFFOREVER Sun 09-Jun-13 20:18:00

Congrats on the house succuss something.

leni sounds like you made your decision. Hope you enjoy your new home whatever obe you decide to choose .

stormy i wasbt convinced about the jumpy thing, mainly because of the damage it could do to the doorway and we rent our home. Does it wreck the doorway? If not i think i will go for it as ds likes to ve upright. Hes soooo nosey. He no longer sleeps in his pram because he is just to nosy.

Right i need the opinions of my mn friends. As you know my mil is here from abroad. Shes staying with us for a month. It seems she is not so helpful with caring of ds or around the home as i thought she would be. In fact shes making more of a mess for me to tidy up and is expecting me to do her washing. She asks me when am i going to put her clothes on to wash. Maybe i have high expectations and im conparing her with my dm. When my dm comes over she feeds, entertains and changes ds. Basically she takes over if im ok with it and i would go for a nap. She has also helped with housework and cooked for us in the early days. Im in need of more help when im on my period as im in so much pain and feel so weak. This is not helping with my aneamia. I havent spoken to dh because he wouldnt like me bad mouthing her and he would just take her side. Also im worried this will pish me and dh further apart.Shes said shes bored being here already and she hasnt even been here a week. We have been taking her out everyday even though i would prefer to be at home. Do your parents or in laws help you out? Do you think its right for me to expect her to help out.?

StormyBrid Sun 09-Jun-13 20:34:00

KFF it's a strong spring that holds the thing either side of the top of the doorframe. No screwing or anything like that. We're renting too, so great big holes in the wall aren't the best idea.

As for the mother in law... An overnight guest doesn't have to help out (although volunteering to wash up always goes down well). A guest for a month? She should be pulling her weight. At the least I'd be expecting her to cook regularly, take her turn with the washing up, and take the baby out so you can get some sleep. Is your husband likely to hear badmouthing however you say it? Or, when she says she's bored, you could perhaps innocently point out some housework that could entertain her?

vjhist85 Sun 09-Jun-13 20:34:25

Wow so much to catch up on! Exciting times house buying something and leni. Also leni I'm just catching up on BGT (guilty pleasure) and watched the egg throwing just as I read your post...oops!

We've had a lovely weekend...in France! Aunt and uncle's ruby wedding so 100 of us went to their house in France for a party! We had a lovely time and dd was incredibly well behaved, she enjoyed being cooed over by everyone and being passed around. I felt about guilty though- I kept thinking "this would be more fun if I wasn't a mum". Gone are the days of getting very drunk with my dad and cousins, smoking too much, singing, sitting round a bonfire etc. instead we went to bed at 10 with a mere 1 pint of pression drunk over the whole day. I wouldn't change things for the world but a time machine back to the old me every now and then would be lovely.

We've decided to go for a jumperoo instead of a door bouncer, but I still don't think DD's head control is good enough yet.

And stormy I'm totally jealous of those house prices. In the SE we're in a 3bed Victorian terrace in the not-so-nice suburb of our town for that price. And now I'm definitely spending the rest of the evening on the right move app looking at property porn in hull.

StormyBrid Sun 09-Jun-13 20:40:18

vj I saw a thread on here once, asking "What would £1m get in your town?" I checked rightmove. My town has zero properties for a million, they're all cheaper. There's one up for sale at the other end of my terrace, it's not even quite fifty grand.

Leni - can I give you some very worse style advice on house buying? Don't be too head lead rational about it. There'll be one that just draws you in. It might not tick all the boxes but there will be something about it... a gut feel... a warm fuzzy hug.... just something. The only time I bought somewhere that won out on logic, but didn't give me the heart tug I never settled, never liked it, and couldn't wait to move. My current house has been an absolute nightmare and money pit, but I've loved it from day one, and we have turned it into something amazing. Go with your gut smile

Eig - Who cares whose baby has the strongest neck. It's not like they are up for the Olympic shot put team any time soon now is it grin. That woman is probably just jealous of you for some reason.

Something Yay smile smile smile !!!

KFF To be blunt, your MIL is a selfish self centred, lazy piece of work, and that is me being polite. It's not like she is a childless spinster who has no idea, she has every idea what it means to have a young baby, and is frankly and embarrassment to the sisterhood. To give you some balance last time my MIL visited she offered to help me with lunch, and when I said no asked if she could iron some shirts or something instead. That's kind of more what you should expect. Your DH should be having words with her.

somethingbeginningwith Sun 09-Jun-13 21:18:20

Thank you all for your well wishes on the house. So exciting!!

Re:Edinburgh...thank you for all the advice. I know I really do have to go or I'll very much regret it. the best option would be to take OH and DS with me but it wouldn't be practical. First of all, I'd be so busy during the days doing promo and evenings doing the show and there'd be little for them to do. Also, the accommodation we're staying is university halls of residence so not really suitable for 2 adults and a little one, and hotels etc are so so expensive during the Fringe period and we can't afford that at the moment sad leni I think doing as you suggest and doing part of the week is the best option. It's just hard to completely leave my hard work to someone else, but that's just me being silly I think smile

On another note, I now have a full box full of outgrown baby clothes. Where has the little newborn gone?! I'll be waving him off to university before I know it won't I? Sob!

KFFOREVER Sun 09-Jun-13 21:46:24

wors and stormy i was thinking the same as you but wasnt too sure if i was overreacting. Ive retreated to tthe bedroom to get away from her because she tells me i dont eat enough fruit. Since when did she have the right to interfere with me. Shes also said im winding ds wrong. Errrr well ive done this for 3months and ds has survived i must be doing something right. Cant believe i have this for another 4weeks.

something i know babies do really grow so quick and it all becomes real when you have to sort out the outgrown babygros.

pudtat Sun 09-Jun-13 21:48:07

Eig, the boy hit 5kg exactly on Thursday. He was 12 weeks yesterday. And I am adding more tummy time to try and work on head and neck control but he hates it. Much prefers peering over a shoulder, but nowhere near ready for door bouncers here yet.

Leni, as an investment manager my advice on property buying is if its your home, buy the one you want to live in, and don't worry too much about the investment side. I know you plan to move, but sometimes plans change and better to be somewhere you like.

Something your mil sounds a piece of work! If she's staying for a month she should at least be neutral on the creating extra work front, and in the circumstances (new baby) I'd expect her to be aiming to be a net positive.

Congrats on Edinburgh... A real shame you can't manage for your DH to go with LO. No chance that a group of you could share an apartment rental or similar? Hope you manage to get there for some of it anyway as that's really exciting. grin

Had a lovely day here. Parents came over for lunch which we ate in the sunshine in the garden, DS was lovely and we managed to actually tidy the house and cook lunch and still be really relaxed. Was great.

Only downside is that he's being a little sod about taking his formula top ups... Last few days he's been refusing them again. Just hope weight gain still good on Wed as otherwise we'll be in bother again.

pudtat Sun 09-Jun-13 21:49:15

Sorry, Something re Edinburgh, KF re mil. Doh!

ecofreckle Sun 09-Jun-13 21:58:44

Hi everyone. Firstly, stormy sorry to hear your news. I hope that you've people around you and that you are doing ok.
Nap angst people (me included here) I just read something interesting in the basic but life saving (although it also says 'your baby is unlikely to have an accident whilst changing nappy now' and we had a mega poo fountaid all over holiday cottage this morning as we were about to embark on our journey home!) book 'your baby week by week': at around 11 weeks our dc's sleep cycle alters from 40 min to 60 min. So, we should expect a natural improvement if we're struggling with crappy short naps. (and stormy yes, I freaked out a bit when I thought dd wasn't doing what wonder weeks suggested she might be but am chilled now as keep mindful of the fact they mention things at earliest time we might observe things).
Congratulations something on your house. Hope you having a drink to celebrate? With ref Edinburgh, great news too! Like others have suggested my first thought was go for whole week and take dh with you too. Make a family adventure out of it.
worse I love the sound of your glove! All we hear on the monitor is hand slurping so anything to mix up the tone is welcome.
leni the pro and con approach is the only way forward, what we'd choose wouldn't match what's best for your family. Sounds very exciting times though.
eig your dd's weight sounds just dandy and as worse said the church lady was lucky to get away without a barbed comment. If we were to line all our babies up they'd be a smorgasbord of diverse lovliness, and that's how nature intended it. There'd be no need for mn if they were all the same!
We returned from hols this eve. Too late for 'normal' bedtime but guess what? Dd didn't care :-) she did object to journey in car though. Lots of crying which pulled at my guilt strings. Luckily dh very sensible and pointed out the holiday gave her lots of fun so journey worth it. We had blue skies and sunshine so were able to bimble around outside lots. Climbed mountains and had picnics. plonko thought of you today as we stopped at hardwick hall on way home. Not far from you? So, all in all fun times but been missing mum terribly. Not sure why especially this last week but probably subconscious as we were in peaks on hols the day she died. Had lots of dreams about her. It's hard because I know she'd have loved my having had a baby and would have been relishing getting involved. She was also the wisest woman I know so her advice would have been very welcome during these crazy baby times. Not wanted to dampen our first family holiday with chat about this so hope it's ok to voice my sadness here. Anyhow, hopefully we'd be making her proud with how we're getting on. And she'd be the first to applaud our having taken dd to her first summit :-)

ecofreckle Sun 09-Jun-13 22:00:35

Oh, mega cross post then! You all came out to play at once! Sorry for doubtless out of date comments

SoYo Sun 09-Jun-13 23:10:13

Place marking as the threads disappeared from my MN. I'll be back at first waking so prob very soon!

KFFOREVER Mon 10-Jun-13 01:41:55

stormy how selfish of me forgot to say earlier that im sorry for your loss.

Its the first of many feed of the night. Surely there comes a point when babies sleep through a bit more. This is exhausting.

eco i have no doubt you have made your mum proud with little eco. Glad you had a nice time on holiday.

pudtat Mon 10-Jun-13 03:10:52

Gosh, yes, me too. Condolences to the Stormy family.

And Eco, that all sounds perfectly understandable. I am sure that your mum would be thrilled to see how you're getting on, as generally your enjoyment of babyeco shines through your posts.

Sleeping through eh? Back to being some way off here, but at least he will still take a dream feed, currently my best way of getting a decent amount into him. Anyone experimented with how long they have to have been asleep to be deep enough under for it work? Could I do his top up post this feed as another by waiting 15 mins for instance?

SoYo Mon 10-Jun-13 03:27:37

KFF your MIL sounds a nightmare. I think you need to hide a stash of chocs & wine in your bedroom. & find reasons to retreat regularly.

Something I think you should go to Edinburgh for the full week. You'd miss LO like crazy but they'd be being well looked after & that way you could properly concentrate on your play. It such a great & I'm sure rare opportunity & something your baby will be immensely proud to have a mum that can do things like that! It's something very cool to tell them about in years to come!

VJ & Eco glad you've both had good breaks. Eco it must be so tough without your Mum but lovely to be able to go to beautiful places & have them remind you of her it's amazing how many little pearls of wisdom mums pass down over the years that stick & we'll be passing them on to our LOs too!

Leni go with your gut about the house. There's no way f knowing what the housing markets going to do, as the last few years have shown, so best to do what will make you happy & be able to enjoy life most!

We're down in very sunny Cornwall & it's beautiful. I'm not sure DDs at her best though. She's a hot, snotty babe on night 3 of karvol & calpol. We went to the most beautiful beach this morning, can't believe it's in the UK! The dog loved it but think DDs still a bit wee to appreciate it!

leniwhite Mon 10-Jun-13 05:05:17

Eco this is definitely one of those times in life where those of us without DMs miss them most. Mine never met OH either and I often wished she could issue some wisdom in the early newborn days. She was always tough on me but for the right reasons and I hope I can do as good a job with DS grin

KK I'd be much ruder than you - doing her washing?! She's having a bubble surely! God knows why she'd want you touching her smalls anyway, most people like to keep that to themselves shockhaving said that I have been surprised how many visitors we've had who we feed etc and then trot off leaving me with piles of washing up to do.

We've lost an hour of sleep here - 9-5 has become 9-4 now hmm, followed by unsettled mornings full of feeds and sleeping all afternoon. Just as you think you have a routine...

Stormy - I'm so sorry too, what sad timing for you. Similarly un-MN-ty hugs to those of you without DMs to see you through this phase of life.

We're back to sleeping through here, and I have sussed the problem. Mixed feeding. Sad though it may be now we've started down that road I am going to have to switch 100% onto bottle from here on in, as the combination option just isn't working.

Firstly my milk has adjusted right down to the point where she just isn't getting a full feed when she needs it, and second now she's discovered bottles she has got lazy. She uses me for snuggles and comfort but doesn't drink enough. For the past two days I have expressed the feeds she'd normally have from me, and she has slept through. I feel terrible as I have been unwittingly under feeding her, and both DH and I had noticed she had become a little thinner sad

I guess this is why all the books say 'don't be tempted to supplement with formula during growth spurt weeks' as it really does mess up the balance. I have always been someone who has had way too much milk before, and the tiddler has always been a very very committed eater so I really didn't envisage there being a problem with going down the mixed route. I feel like the ultimate bad mummy, and I mean that seriously not in my usual flippant way.

On a more amusing note, I have learned that taking her-maj to one of those family run cafe places on a sunday morning (you know the ones.... fab food, but incredibly slow service) is a bad idea. We only got to about 10th on the list before we'd used up all our quiet baby credits and faced the ultimate meltdown. DH nearly cried as I walked him away from the carrot cake.

The sun has disappeared today. DD will be thrilled, she doesn't do summer apparently.

SoYo Mon 10-Jun-13 08:04:52

Wors you are certainly not a bad Mummy, you've given her an amazing start to life, you're not changing because it makes you happy or for your benefit, you're changing because she is showing a preference for the big, filling bottles & you want her to gain weight & be healthy & happy. It sounds like now it's the right option for all of you & what your DD needs is a happy family & a full tummy, however that may happen.

Madam here has got the perfect knack of waiting just until main courses are served before suddenly realising she fancies a scream!

Our friends are joining us on holiday today with their 1yr old! So tiny cottage with MissMadam, PuppyMonster & a toddler! Who said holidays were supposed to be relaxing!!

plonko Mon 10-Jun-13 08:04:58

Morning all! Just had a mega catch up. We've been down at a wedding in Hertfordshire so no mnetting since Friday night! Mum had DS for the weekend, which she loved but made me very sad. Was glad to hear that they didn't manage to leave the house at all and her one achievement for the day was making a cheesecake - makes me feel much better! Going to a wedding has finally made dp want to get married, even though he proposed almost two years ago. Though I suspect it has more to do with getting so pissed he fell asleep with his head on the bed but body on the floor.

Eco glad you had a lovely holiday. There's nowhere quite like the peaks eh? Sorry to hear about missing your DM, I can't imagine how hard it must be (you too Leni). Memories are powerful things. Hardwick Hall has a very special place in my heart, being a regular haunt of my dearly departed grandparents its where they celebrated every birthday and anniversary I can remember. Fond memories of grandad making a crack at a very young waitress there many years ago!

KF I'd be fuming. I've been blessed with a lovely mil who always brings lunch, washes up and offers to have DS so I can rest. If she wasn't automatically doing that I'd be dropping some pretty heavy hints! No one should expect you to play host right now, though as Leni said I'm amazed at the number of gormless twats guests we've had who've stayed for hours, eaten our food and left a mountain of mess for me to cry about. Nip this in the bud!

Something sounds exciting! I'd go for a few days with man and baby in tow. Fringe is such a great atmosphere, and too good to miss a production if your very own play. Do it! You can only regret the things you didn't do.

SoYo hope LO improves soon, but glad to hear the holiday is going nicely.

Stormy sorry to hear about your loss. Totally right to be broody, I don't know if we'll manage the three year gap we'd envisaged! Totally going to get DS a door bouncer though, he's so kicky when awake. I take it bring vertical suits your rather refluxy wean?

DS asleep. Do I get breakfasted and showered in peace, or try to get back to sleep?

plonko Mon 10-Jun-13 08:12:40

Oh Worse yA Vedic sage emphasized that the basis of happy and fulfilling married life is the sense of unity, intimacy and love between husband and wife both physically, mentally and spiritually. Hence wife is considered to be the Ardhangani of husband as per Hindu tradition. Thus, marriage is not for self-indulgence, but rather should be considered a lifelong social and spiritual responsibility. Married life is considered an opportunity for two people to grow from life partners into soul mates.[1][2][3]ou're a fantastic mummy. I really mean that! You bfed for what, three months? That's outstanding. She's had such a good start. How long were you hoping to bf for? I only ask because in my book it's the beginning part that's the important bit. After that its just another choice, neither good nor bad. And the beauty of bottle feeding is that you can see exactly how much she's getting. It doesn't have to be a hassle, (premake a days worth, keep in the fridge and microwave when she's hungry for genuine bad mother points) , and other people can help you more.

It's not a bad way to feed her, it's a different way.

Sod it I'm having breakfast in peace. Naps are for sissies.

plonko Mon 10-Jun-13 08:13:47

Ooh dear how did I copy and paste something about Hindu weddings into my post? I hate smartphones.

Plonko that made me laugh. I'm skilled at doing stuff like that too grin. I still cringe at the memory of emailing a note to my sister inviting her round for the weekend to the entire fx trading desk. I hadn't even put her name on it so it looked really dodgy. I. Nearly. Died.

Thanks for the kind comments everyone. You've cheered me up smile

KFFOREVER Mon 10-Jun-13 08:38:46

Plonko that made me laugh too. I know im sleep deprived but i thought it started playing havoc with my vision too.

StormyBrid Mon 10-Jun-13 08:43:12

Thanks all for the condolences. My grandma was very old though, and she'd lost the plot, and she'd been saying for years she was ready to die, so it's for the best really. Just a shame DD never met her.

As for mothers, mine's still around, but she's got a brain condition that means she's slowly losing it too. She loves DD, but she can't be a lot of practical help.

something would it be possible for your bloke and baby to stay somewhere outside Edinburgh (so less expensive) but not too far away? They could have a fun holiday and lots of adventures, and you could meet up with them regularly so you're not missing out.

I don't have any outgrown baby clothes. Got rid of them already! Quite useful having my brother, his girlfriend, and their halfway-to-a-baby-already bump just across the terrace.

eco sleep cycle length increases? No one's told DD that... I'll just have to keep trying to knacker her out. She keeps surprising us anyway, at least once every two days she manages a decent length one.

KFF they sleep eventually. Even if the worst happens and it takes a few years! Just think back to two months ago though, things have improved since then, surely, even if they're not perfect yet? It's been nearly four weeks since DD slept through, and I'm still hopeful she'll do it again sometime soon.

pud our general rule for night feeds is to leave three hours between them. When we're trying to get more milk down her, we go with 10 and 1 for dream feeds (if she's had plenty during the day we just go for about 11.30 and then see when she wakes). The main thing to remember is they have limited capacity - if you feed him and he goes to sleep and you try a dream feed fifteen minutes later, he's not going to have room in there and it'll all come back up again. Does he eat better when he's asleep? DD always does, can pretty well guarantee four ounces if she's asleep.

worse I can see why you feel bad, but remember The Guilt doesn't help anyone. You've done brilliantly with the boobs for three months, and got her off to an excellent start. Big pat on the back is in order, I think.

Half past four this morning, DD started shouting, so I took her some milk. Very suspicious aroma as soon as I opened the door. Went to pick her up and ended up with a wet hand. I don't know what monster was lurking up her bum but suffice to say it's died a violently explosive death. The bits on her legs and feet were actually dried on, so god knows how long she'd been peacefully sleeping while liberally coated in crap.

Today I'm planning a mission round the charity shops for baby books. She's finally getting over the screaming after the bath thing, so bedtime stories can happen. Exciting times.

WingDefence Mon 10-Jun-13 08:53:43

Argh so much to catch up on!

Firstly, sorry for your loss stormy sad Both DH's parents passed away before I got together with him so I don't have a MIL but apparently I'd have got on with her.

But as for the MIL problem above - you need to put this in AIBU and I bet you'll get somegoodways of dealing with her!

leni, the schools are better on Beckenham and I used to live in Gainsborough Close (my first house), just round the corner from your proposed place off Brackley road. It's a great area for children and the high street etc is fab. Good transport links too. <waves pompoms for Beckenham!>

Got to catch up with everyone else's news and will post later brew

WingDefence Mon 10-Jun-13 08:59:12

she'd been peacefully sleeping while liberally coated in crap

stormy, surely you mean while literally covered in crap? grin

plonko that made me laugh too!

somethingbeginningwith Mon 10-Jun-13 09:43:12

vj it's okay for you to miss your pre-baby self, having a little one is a huge shock to the system both physically and emotionally. I only finished uni a couple of years ago and a lot of my friends have only just graduated so I was very much used to the student lifestyle of socialising and nights out and that's all changed now. Like you, I wouldn't trade it for the world but I often find myself missing it.

stormy I must have missed your post earlier, ever so sorry for your loss thanks

worse what an amazing achievement to breast feed as long as you have. I admire that, I only lasted a week, then 3 days expressing before I chose to stop. DS was permanently latched on and I clearly wasn't producing enough. I certainly felt The Guilt when I decided to stop, had a little cry and a little wine and realised it was what was best for us. Fastforward to now and I have a happy, healthy ff-fed baby. You gave your LO a wonderful start in life and that's brilliant!

SIL is expecting in August, but she's having a DD. Hope she likes blue because that's where all our outgrown baby clothes are going!

I've got to go to Edinburgh really haven't I? You're all, of course, right smile

Any other c-section mummies found a magical way to get rid of the bulge yet? I'm back in pre-pregnancy skinny jeans, they might be ridiculously tight but they're on and staying on!

Ooh baby books sound fun, let us know if you find any good ones! I can't wait to read to DS!

pudtat Mon 10-Jun-13 09:47:22

Plonko, I kept waiting for the big reveal on relevance... Was it to do with bonding being about more than feeding etc... Only really got suspicious at 12 3! I trust your techie skills more than you it seems! grin

Eigmum Mon 10-Jun-13 10:14:23

worse it's funny I was going to ask how you were going as struggling with it all myself here. Everyone, including dh now ( although he is more subtle- "did you see that baby a month or do older than Dd downing that agent bottle after her baptism, reminds me how easy it was with ds, I feel I can't help, nanny - how are you going to manage the wedding in July and Robbie Williams concert ( I know shot me now!) if you are STILL, breastfeeding. Not fair on dd to leave it longer, that's before we start on my parents.

So what is stopping me. Well my first go with mixed feeding went the reverse of yours worse, took more from the boob and minimum from bottle so lost weight ( not helped by getting sick). Gets awful stomach cramps which I think must be from mixing as have exclusively feed her for three days and nights and no cramps... And easier poos.

Ideally I'd like to feed her for 2 more months til around 5/6 months then switch in time for me to be over the switch and back at work but worried dd will find it harder to switch later and don't have a lot of support for keeping going.... I know as I am ridiculously bloo*y minded that I can do what I want, my child etc but as I tend to over think things and like to have a plan I need to make some choices even if it's just, I will keep feeding her for a week. I have tried expressing and dh feeding but same issue as she only takes 2 ounces. I know she is getting more from me as I can express 3 ounces from each boob easily and she usually takes both.

Eigmum Mon 10-Jun-13 10:34:21

Oh, everyone else who posted during my long winded post hi! Hi wingd and to everyone who doesn't have a dm to share things with big hug. My is at odds with me over the feeding but it's still lovely to have parents around and I know my dh misses his df most at this time...

Eigmum Mon 10-Jun-13 10:54:24

something my little one loves the "that's not my train, dinasour etc " series ... And the sleepy baby book, always used to read those and now at 3 DS has started to pretend to read it himself ( as he knows it off by heart) so years of use! We thought he was reading til he spelt of the letters on his dressing up police costume radio, he read P O L I C E, and I said wat does that spell, and he said Radio!

StormyBrid Mon 10-Jun-13 16:47:35

Quiet day on here today...

We've acquired eight books, for a grand total of £4.05. All fairly short, some of them rhyme, two of them are about going to bed. Hopefully she'll like them.

pud I meant to say earlier, your son may not be great shakes at the head support thing yet, but I bet you he's mastered something that the next baby hasn't a clue about. They all get the same skills in the end, they just vary in what order they acquire them. Mine, she's all about the standing up and she's got good strong legs, but she's arse when it comes to trying to grab things. I'm not sure she's even realised she can grab things yet...

leniwhite Mon 10-Jun-13 19:30:09

Wing our plan is to buy a proper house in Beckenham before DS goes to school grin

Worse I'm in exactly the same boat - but basically doing double feeds - one boob then a bottle or both boobs at night (4am). Not sure whether to keep going like that or finally stop the BF... We can't go out anywhere on just boobs, he's got too lazy.

Had a mad day, have reserved the Greenwich flat smile so now having to find all the documents they need to assess us, not easy when most of it is not obvious (like proof of where our savings came from?!) or was lost in the fire...

DS has been chief grump all day so wrestling him and the scanner at the same time wasn't particularly relaxing. Seems to be loving dummy today though after the initial gagging confused

SoYo Mon 10-Jun-13 21:16:14

Stormy you're so right about them all acquiring different skills at different times. Mine's very strong, wants to stand all the time, great head control but bugger all hand/eye coordination. Will sometimes grab things when placed in her hands but is then usually so shocked she drops them!

Despite my best suncare efforts DD is looking a tiny tad bronzed so I'm actually glad of the slightly cooler Cornish weather! Our wonderful friends are here with their 16mth old now too & it's so lovely watching here & thinking that'll be DD having daily adventures this time next year!

Hope everyone has a good night!

KFFOREVER Mon 10-Jun-13 21:47:39

stormy and soyo im with you on this. Ds wants to sit up and will try to pull himself up when i lay him down but can he grab anything... Noooo.

Its nightime again. I dread these unpredictable nights especially when ds has been a grumpy so and so today. (leni it must be a full moon).Hes tired but has been fighting naps which is unusual and not feeding properly. Usually he settles for naps himself. Hes also been sticking his arm in his mouth a fist no longer satisfys him and has been trying to bite me. So im thinking it may be teething or a wonder week but at 13wks instead of 12.

WingDefence Mon 10-Jun-13 22:16:01

Evening all.

leni you will make the best decision for you and your family I know! And shock that it was your friend on BGT.

KF I hope you have a good night. DD seems to have gone slightly backward in that her first stretch is now 3-4 hours (which I know is still great for some people) whereas she was doing 5 or 6 a few times a week until last week. She is napping better in her Moses basket in the daytime now though and has been up there in her basket from 8:30 tonight so I'll wake her soon (poor thing) for a feed at 10:30ish.

Her legs are really strong too! And we out her forward-facing in the baby bjorn for a short while today as we took her and DS to a local farm visitor place thing today and she was happy looking at everything that was going on. I know it's a bit early but her head control is good and we wont make it a permanent change for a while yet.
When we stopped in the cafe, DH passed her over to me to cuddle as she was tired and she fell asleep instantly on my shoulder! Bless smile

Eig, re your post much further up about where you work... I'm an alumnus (alumna?) of K--- but work for an accg institute now. And that's all I'm saying grin

Re: feeding, I'm still BFing here and I am trying to stretch out the daytime feeds but sometimes it is just easier to pop DD on when she's grumpy or over-tired even if it's only been 1-2hrs since the last feed or sometimes shorter The gaps between feeds get shorter the longer the day goes on. She takes the one bottle a day pretty easily now and we have started to put formula in it <gasp!>, simply because I was finding expressing just approx two oz a day a pain. But I'm still happy to bf for the time being even though strictly it's not 'exclusive' any more although it is as near as dammit.
My DM has been especially happy though as she really wants to babysit for us, even just for an afternoon, which I think is great, but it means she gets this face grin when she asks how dd is getting on with the bottles and I tell her she's doing well and is drinking formula too. hmm

Right, I must get ready to wake the little one. I'm also going to try to upload a recent pic of DD to my profile and will let you know if I succeed!

WingDefence Mon 10-Jun-13 22:25:49

Photo of DD from this morning has been uploaded smile

leniwhite Mon 10-Jun-13 22:50:21

Skills acquisition check in: we have grasping (followed by hyperventilation and THAT bottom lip...). We have some head control (and some headbutting) and manic kicking. We have no tummy time whatsoever or head lifting, rolling or standing.

Above all, our greatest skill appears to be expanding lung capacity - this kid has pipes!

ecofreckle Mon 10-Jun-13 23:29:00

wing a photo! How exciting. Can we look at each other's profiles then? I'm a mn dunce. Do tell me how I can see and I'll try and do same with my dd too. A visual is a good hook for my brain.
Dh, dd and I are going to my place of work tomorrow so I can do a day of work. Eek. Have set alarm clock and everything so better away to sleep. Sweet dreams everyone and thanks for comments re my mum.

Eigmum Tue 11-Jun-13 00:07:21

wingd you are an alumni of a great firm! We probably now each other in real life or certainly know of each other!

Yes, dd was taking a bottle a day ok and now isn't so keen.... ( aka not keen at all), had a good chat with dh about it and an older friend whose kids are 13 and 15. She fed both of them for 5 months , no expressing, then cold turkeyed to bottles while expressing the milk and it took a week, then se went back to work. Realized I don't have any friends who bf this long so nice to find someone to talk too...

Dd is rubbish at tummy time, no interest in standing, just stares very intently at things and smiles a lot! ( except when a bottle is nearby!)

WingDefence Tue 11-Jun-13 04:01:40

Ah but eig, tis a big place, I left a looooong time ago and I think we're in completely different sectors so don't worry, I think our secret identities are safe grin

eco, my name should be clickable and then it'll go to my public profile. You'll be able to click a link to photos there. If you want to do the same (go on!), you've got to go to your profile and set it to public but you control what (if any) details are made public.

DD stirred/woke at 2:15 looking for her thumb but I shhed her when she found it and she went back to sleep till 3:40. I tried the same thing but she was getting too restless even with her thumb so I've just fed her and she's zonked out.

Anyone else hate the dawn chorus now?! hmm

vjhist85 Tue 11-Jun-13 05:05:51

Unusually bad night here- perhaps she's getting vibes? I'm doing my first KIT day today, she's now gone back to sleep but I'm wide awake so getting up and getting my head around everything (and the coffee on). She takes a bottle fine from me now, but because DH is a lazy so and so she's not really ever had much from anyone else. I've got loads of ebm waiting for my dm so fingers crossed.

Worse dont forget that if you want to (of course you might not!) you could work on your supply and go back to ebf. Also- have you had LO weighed to confirm your suspicions? There could be lots of reasons why she is waking in the night, not always hunger. Sorry if I'm speaking out of place, just thought if you don't want to switch completely to ff there may be ways round it.

KFFOREVER Tue 11-Jun-13 06:51:53

Agghhhh the farts woke ds up again. When will he grow out of this?

vj good luck with your kit.

Im thinking to arrange a kit day so i can see if i really missed work or the adult company of no baby talk.

ecofreckle Tue 11-Jun-13 07:00:27

Am in enviable position of having a baby who slept from 1930 til ....who knows when.... (still snoring) but I got up at 0530 to pump my boulders and do the washing, and indulge in a little one handed mumsnetting.
Thanks wing - I have managed to upload a photo myself too, but sadly cannot work out how to click on yours.... I'll take another look this evening.
VJ kit day here today too. Not sure how I feel about it. Need to re-boot brain and get it working.
Have sunny days everyone. The sun has got his hat on here in Norfolk.

Morning all - Well the good news is madam is back to sleeping through, and the bad, her recent hiccup was obviously 100% down to being a lazy muppet and not bothering when offered the breast. I've not cut out bm yet, I'm just expressing it so that I know how much she is getting. VJ - I know I could boost supply up again, but tbh part of the reason for going over to mixed is bf-ing is burning the weight off me. I've always been a tiny skinny runty thing but I'm now 10lbs down on my pre-pregnancy weight and it's not a good look.

Ah, the old milestones thing. Well ever since the HV asked me whether dd had discovered her feet yet, at 8 weeks (she hadn't.... she still hasn't) I'm with the rest of you - they just do stuff at their own pace. She's knows about hands - they are for holding Mr pink teddy so that you can eat his ears, grabbing people, whacking things, finding thumbs, all kinds of good things.... but feet? Not on her radar.

Wing - the dawn chorus sucks. Big time. I am convinced it is our feathered friends way of getting back at us for being anti-social enough to consider cats good companions. Or dogs. One of mine has a personal vendetta against blackbirds. If I was a blackbird I'd probably sing very loudly outside my place at 4am too.

OOOOHhhhhh photos smilesmilesmile Cute

Leni - good luck with the move - there is nothing quite like your first place, you'll never forget it. I still have nostalgic memories for my first flat, and still miss it. It was a tiny one bedder, but it was mine, all mine well mostly the bank's

Right, I'd better get the tiddler up and fed before buildery types rock up to ruin my day finish the painting.

Eco - gorgeous gorgeous gorgeous smile.
Wing - can't get into your profile sad

Anypants Tue 11-Jun-13 07:56:15

Morning all - thought i'd share my experience of my first KIT day yesterday which went better than expected. Finally got DD to start taking a bottle of ebm last week so DM had the means to feed her (phew) and, although napping is still screamy, I told her to do whatever she wanted to get through the day. She fed her at 10 and then I popped over at lunch to feed her again and then by the time I finished at 4.30, she was asleep so I fed her again at 5. DM and DF had played with her and had her sleeping on them most of the day - not surprising as we'd had a restless night but as it was the first time they'd had her all day, it went well and they said they'd do it again grin
I enjoyed the break but realised i'm not ready to go back anytime soon. Plus, I had to get up at 6.30 in order to get to work for 9 and I was shattered by lunchtime as, in reality, i'd been awake since 4 on and off. I've been trying DD in her cot for a few nights but she is really restless and wakes at 1, 3, 5 and 7. I'm going to go back to the moses in our room tonight as it's not working and will give it another go when i've got the patience for a sleepless night envy
Good luck to all having KIT days today - how long will you last before texting/calling to check everything is ok? I lasted an hour and a half... blush

pudtat Tue 11-Jun-13 09:32:57

Ha Any, I managed til lunchtime, but only because we record everything on the BabyConnect app and I logged in at work so could see how much he'd drunk, when he'd slept etc. big mother is watching you

Lovely pic of happy summit baby Eco! Wing, I can't get into your profile either.

Stormy, thanks for your various comments. Re dream feeds, my query was in relation to the top ups I need to give DS in addition to the bfing that i do. I have introduced a 10pm bottle df to try and keep his calories up and he usually takes it well, 100ml no probe except last night when he managed to start choking and woke up 40ml in, sigh so was wondering if it might work for the later night feed when I bf first and he has taken to refusing his bottle.

However, as yesterday was a particularly crap day for him taking additional ff, i tried to sneak an extra dream feed in at 9, planning to do the next a little later. But no dice - he simply lay there with the teat in his mouth, and no suckling reflex whatsoever. <rollseyes>

DS is a cerebral little body really. Lots of looking at stuff and you can see the cogs turning. He has hands which are great for sucking, and is very good at batting hanging toys now, though grasping is still a bit of a puzzle. Legs are for kicking wildly while lying on your back (I have uploaded a photo too and his leg is a blur of movement smile). Not so bothered about standing, though we are starting to be pulled into a sitting position. Still hates tummy time and head control is improving but still a bit Mr Wobbly Head. Smiles are to be doled out after careful consideration, but can be bestowed in return for mummy kisses and daddy hand eating and for his elephant wall sticker over his changing mat and when, having just had bum cleaned, further poonami is released. His vocal range is amazing though. Lots of noises and several with very specific meanings. It's much easier to tell when he's tired, or hungry or bored now as he can actually tell you. And facial expressions are great, who knew a bottom lip could project that far!

somethingbeginningwith Tue 11-Jun-13 09:36:41

Good luck to everyone with KIT days today. I should really think about sorting one out before I completely forget that I even had a job never mind what to do when I get back. I keep saying that I miss work but I also think it's the adult company and conversation as I know for a fact when I'm back I'll know where I'd much prefer to be.

It's hair drying time here and baby boy is shouting for me to get off mn and make funny faces to go along with my funny hair. Hope you all have lovely days.

plonko Tue 11-Jun-13 10:12:29

Kit days sound so stressful. I probably ought to arrange one but I think I'm going to jump straight into my flexible working application. Eco and Vj let us know how they go!

Aw photos grin Eco your girl is gorgeous! And Pud looks like you've been blessed with a long 'in too eh? Ive uploaded some snaps too cos im that much of a show off!

DS's feet are straining at the ends of some of his 3-6 month sleep suits. I went to see a friend yesterday who declared he'd doubled in size in about two weeks, so looks like we'll be out shopping again soon! The pile of outgrown clothes has become a mound. It also seems that we need to move up to size 3 teats, he's becoming so fussy on the bottle!

Development milestones are such a load of tosh. Unless there are real problems my philosophy is that your kid will develop on their own, in their own timeframe. We're just here to encourage that. I didn't bother with tummy time for a good month or so and then he presto, he was suddenly making crawling motions when we eventually went back to it. Every phase is so short and so much fun (!) that I told myself last week to stop reading the baby books just for interest, and just delight in his day to day.

<looks up and sees the hat I just weaved out of lentils>

WingDefence Tue 11-Jun-13 10:52:50

Mmm, tasty looking hat plonko grin You must have a very 'tall' baby if he is already pushing the seams of 3-6 months! Could it be particular brand of clothing that's on the small side? I know many people who just cut the feet off sleep suits when they get too short in the leg so you don't have to run out shopping just yet!

Right, photo should be there now under my photos. It's of DD asleep yesterday morning smile

I may use a KIT in two weeks time to dial into a meeting down in London as it would be crazy for me to take DD down on the red eye train and probably end up feeding her in the meeting (er, not likely even though I am happy to feed her pretty much anywhere!) unless work would be prepared to pay for DH or D to come with me and babysit and I doubt that when train fares are approx £300 peak return.

Although I secretly would love to take DD first class on the train (it's sometimes cheaper than Standard on Virgin trains) and have all the staff cooing over her!

WingDefence Tue 11-Jun-13 10:53:35

*or DM

StormyBrid Tue 11-Jun-13 11:01:03

All those adorable babies, it's making me want one! Oh wait, I already have one. grin Will try to get a decent photo of her after her nap.

plonko your friend may be right about him doubling in size. We're not even into the 3-6 month clothes yet! Not far off though, everything's fitting pretty well at the moment so give her a fortnight and she'll have outgrown it all. Particularly now she's actually eating a decent amount. Sunday set a new record: 31 ounces! This is because she's getting six feeds during the day and two at night usually, but the explodey 4.30am poo meant she had an extra night feed that day.

Dammit, she's just started squeaking. Still on 45 minute naps that you could set your watch by.

pud that later night feed, is he waking up and shouting for food, or are you going in and getting him up for a feed at a set time? If the latter, then it may be easier to just try a dream feed with a bottle there. But if he's waking up and then refusing the bottle it's a bit harder. Hmm. I suppose a bit of trial and error is required there, and there's a limit to how long you'll want to be sitting around waiting while he sleeps. Try after fifteen minutes and see how he goes? Or if he always wakes at about the same time for that feed, you could try setting an alarm for half an hour and seeing if he'll take a bottle in his sleep then.

worse what counts as discovering feet? DD's discovered she can kick me in the throat if I'm leaning over and talking to her on the changing mat. Does that count? Apparently it's hilarious.

eco are you getting 12+ hours of sleep without any feeds in there? If so I am very jealous! Not that our nights are bad, by any stretch of the imagination. Last night I fell asleep shortly after the 10.30 feed, which she slept right through, and she must've slept through the next one too because I didn't wake up until she started shouting at 6am. And after a bit of grumbling she then went back to sleep until 8.45. Definitely can't complain at that!

KFF as mobility increases, they get better at working their own farts out, and theoretically shouldn't be so bothered by them at night. Same with burps, I think.

Ah, I see Wing's sorted her profile. Another ridiculously cute baby!

KFFOREVER Tue 11-Jun-13 13:01:44

Ahhh have we all started putting photos up. Will have to suss how to do that.

Ds is asleep and mil went for a walk. Spoke to dh about her not helping. He just said count the days until she goes and told me not to make myself tired with the housework. What a sympathetic dh i have... Not.

We are growing out of 3-6mths clothes too. Ds is on 98th centile for length. I measure him so i can write it in his baby books. I know i know but he is my pfb.

As for discovering feet. What is that hv on? Isnt it too early for that? Ds just kicks away and moves up the changing mat.

Well done to the little cherubs who have started to sleep through. I just have to teach my farty cherub to sleep through.

On another note there is a thread in chat where someone text their partner i love you and wrote what response they got. Quite funny. Some partners were suspicious. I joined in and text dh. The response i got was last night you hated me and now you love me.

Have a good day everyone.

Rainbowbabyhope Tue 11-Jun-13 14:32:12

Went to first playgroup ever today. DD clearly loved being surrounded by people but we only stayed for 15mins as there were a lot of snotty and clearly ill children there (was a newborn - 2yrs). Why anyone would bring an ill child somewhere like that is beyond me! This we will stick with sitting in the fresh air in the park looking at squirrels, birds and passers by!

leniwhite Tue 11-Jun-13 15:28:45

I put up some photos too smile

We seem to have bogeys galore, but not really snot yet... dummy is back in favour and we've spent a good portion of the day rolling about on the floor!

vjhist85 Tue 11-Jun-13 17:07:15

Well- KIT day done and dusted. I'm knackered! Took me ages to get to sleep after dream feed last night (worrying about today) then couldn't get back to sleep after she woke at 4. However today was a success! Happily took bottles of ebm for dm, and napped, including one of an hour and a half! God knows dm'd secret there! Work was good, nice to get the brain going and it made me realise that I'm not really the SAHM type, looking forward to going back 3 days a week in November. What's nice is that since we've got home she's been unusually cuddly. Nice to feel loved!

Milestones: my 7th march but 0.4th centile baby is not the most sporty yet. Feet are still those weird things that fly toward her face. Batting of toys is very slowly starting to resemble grabbing. She hates tummy time and still has quite a wobbly head, although we're getting there! Very occasional standing but this little girl thinks kneeling is the coolest way to hang out. But she was an early smiler, a very early giggler, and listens to every word spoken with a face that pretends to be understanding.

ecofreckle Tue 11-Jun-13 20:33:38

:-) photos!! That's what my brain needs for hooking info about all of you onto. Pud i can see those cogs turning - lovely. plonko that's some head control you got going on there - cute! wing oh that little chubby arm - what a beauty couldn't you just nibble them they're so lovely? leni love that pic of him in blue - looks like a catalogue pic.
Think I got those babies matched to the right mummies.....
Thanks for posting those.
And thanks for the baby love you sent my way for our summit pic. It's so lovely when people say nice things about your baby isn't it? But all babies are delicious Oh, hang on.... when I was in Tunbridge Wells a couple of weeks ago there was a 6 page spread of all of the entries to the bonny baby competition and there were a few unsavory, or at least remarkable, ones
stormy This 12 hour sleep thing is very new. And probably isn't really a 'thing' yet! Just these last two nights. If I went to bed at 1930 too I'd doubtless get a lovely chunk of much needed kip but silly arse here stays up til midnight enjoying her DH, reading a book, doing the washing, telephoning my old man, languishing in a too hot bath...... I've woken much earlier than her because a) after 11 weeks my body is programmed to b) she has found her hands in a big way and the slurping noises can be heard in Suffolk and c) my bloody boobs are like rocks and the tiniest movement is agony: pumped 5oz in 10 mins this morning (is that normal for some of you mega milkers?). Having observed her for quite a while last night I could see that the thumb was being sucked hard and she was often raising her legs in the air and wriggling. But her eyes were closed and she didn't squawk for food. So maybe this doesn't count as sleeping through and I should be picking her up and giving her food (I know she'd take it; she's only refused once). It's a bit of a quandry really. But weigh in tomorrow and if they say she's ok I'll leave her be.
The KIT day today was as far from a KIT day as you can get. It was less keeping in touch and more 'a proper days work'. For various reasons my post hasn't been back-filled so my boss is carrying a lot on top of her normal stuff. There are a couple of projects she's been unable to keep on top of so she thrust those upon me. A day of finances and report writing for me. But that makes it sound unpleasant. It wasn't. I surprised myself by not finding it a massive chore and was able to engage brain just fine. any I lasted 1.5 hours too! I had asked DH to send me text to confirm the 10.30 bottle had got eaten but no text received. Ggrrrr!! They were in a coffee shop around the corner being coo-ed over by old ladies; bottle gone. DH popped back for her 1330 feed on the boob. They had a nice day together and the new bottle acceptance (found just last week) helped make it less stressful. VJ I too was wide awake at silly o-clock thinking about it and getting out of the house by 8 was tricky. You'll be impressed/mortified at the thought of my expressing what would have been the 1030 feed sat at the desk next to my boss (female), whilst typing into a spreadsheet one handed and taking calls from the IT man as my emails have been frozen. Not very classy, but there was a lot to do!
soyo cornwall sounds lovely. Wave to the south coast for me please if you see it. My nan was from those parts, and like DM a mightly fine example of a woman and taken from us much too early. How are you finding it with baby and someone else's toddler? I have had this twice now and found it inexplicably tiring, especially when you consider I wasn't caring for the toddler. It's an interesting glance into our future isn't it? Walking! Talking! Food! eek.....
KF ha ha :-) if I texted my DH I'd expect a similar response! I'm a bit up and down since this pregnancy/baby lark.
Speaking of DH I have sent him to theatre tonight to see Derren Brown's 'Infamous' tour as a slightly early anniversary present. I am sad to be having to miss it but hope he's having fun. So actually, on retrospect, I imagine if I sent a text saying I love you he'd reply with some gushy gratitude for being encouraged out on a night out.

vjhist85 Tue 11-Jun-13 20:49:27

Oooh the photos are amazing. I am rubbish and can't remember yet who belonged to whom but I so far have noticed a) baby gym mat thing and b) zoo baby gro in common. I will work out how to get pics of my tiny one. Although she looks decidedly undainty as although she's a tiny 10lb, about 9lb of that appears to be in her enormous cheeks!

Eco- I did not enjoy my expressing experience today. In my boss' office which doesn't lock so had to put a chair in front of the door and stick paper over the window! Oh- and I know the local paper baby competition well, I live in TW! It's run every year and confirms to me that yes, some babies aren't quite as attractive as all ours are!!

plonko Tue 11-Jun-13 21:17:16

Stormy I'm impressed that your dd has started taking so much! That's about what we've managed in the last 24 hours, and I'm fairly sure chubbo's getting on for weighing a stone (clearly takes after me). Oh and I've ordered the door bouncer you recommended, can't wait for DS to try it!

Eco he hasn't tolerated us holding his head for nearly two months. Unlike Vj's LO, my DS seems to be more of a doer than a thinker. (Again, takes after me)
Sounds like you really enjoyed today. Great mental image of a multitasking mum answering phones, tapping away and expressing.

Loved seeing everyone's baby pics. Naw grin but yes, baby comps in my mum and dads local paper is always good for a laugh. Some of the names! I saw some poor kid with a triple hyphenate first name in there last year.

I realised earlier that DS has been on the same size feeds and teats for the last seven weeks. That can't be right, can it? Anyway I tried faster teats earlier to see if it'd solve the bottle fussiness but alas, he just kept choking. At one point he looked at me as if to say 'oh mother, really.' Back to the old ones for now! It's the supermarket clothes we particularly struggle with the length of, gap and next for nicely but bankrupt me

somethingbeginningwith Tue 11-Jun-13 23:16:25

Ooh baby pics! I can't see any on my phone sad I'll have to go on the computer tomorrow to have a peek! Can't help but go mushy when looking at beautiful baby pics.

As far as development goes for DS, excellent at standing and head control is brilliant. He also started reaching and grabbing a week or so ago. He's definitely not feeling the rolling though, tummy time is no fun and he will kick up a fuss. The only time he rolls is accidentally in his sleep. One of my favourite things he does is reach for the toys on his playmat while having what sounds like quite an interesting discussion with them. Wish I knew what he chats about.

plonko DS has been on size 2 teats for a couple of weeks and has been on 210ml feeds for aaaaaages! Has anyone else started thinking about when to introduce baby porridge/muesli/etc? DM brought some over for him today and it says for 4-6 months but I think we'll start doing it sooner.

leniwhite Wed 12-Jun-13 05:05:26

Ooh blimey, we're still on size 1 teats and haven't got past 180ml feeds either. He chokes even on those and has started sicking up a lot more lately hmm

My boobs have broken - can't seem to express even a feed's worth now. Turning more and more to ff just to keep up. Frustrating after all that effort, but I'm really struggling with the allergies and nausea when we boob feed now despite the loratidine.

I've kept that jungle animals babygro for posterity wink

The pics are so so cute. I'll have to act my act together and add her-maj to the portfolio.

Developmental wise, well hmm... no idea where she is with respect with where she should be, but she seems a very happy little person which suits me just fine. She's definitely a thinker and bright as a button. Loves going new places and is fascinated by just stuff really. Faces in particular. It's quite embarrassing... she'll just stare, especially at people who look like they might not like babies. She sleeps less in the sling now as she wants to look around, and always wakes up on the high street in order to have a good old nosey at what's going on. The best part is she recognises people and routines. Daddy gets a huge smile and a giggle when he gets home (I can see where that's going....!), if she's been having a scream-a-thon in the pram it stops the second we walk in the front gate, the sound of the bath running can stop any amount of tantruming, as can my starting to make up a bottle, and her face lights up at the sight of the sling or the car seat. Those mean an outing. Yay!!!

No idea what she weighs, but physically she's going to be tall (at least I hope she is) as her feet are huge. It's tall or a troll. The first thing the midwife said as she busted her way into the world was 'oh my goodness.... look at those feet' confused! That said despite their size she has yet to notice them (which was what the hv was on about). According to her, babies go through a phase of being fascinated by their feet, and will spend hours just looking at them. Really? She's fascinated by many things sure, but feet? Nope. I'd kind of be up for her spending more time looking at them and less time booting me with them, but hey ho. Head control, yup, we've got that, but rolling, no. Not unless you the sideways slump when attempting to crawl.

So there we have it, a potted summary of the achievements to date of the mini-worse grin

Leni how's your ds coping with the formula? I've had to up the amount here too, and it's given the tiddler horrendous trapped wind. Yesterday was a loooonnngggg day of tears, tantrums and terrible farts. Poor little lady, and poor me! Why do these things always happen on days DH is away and I'm flying solo?

Hope you all have had a good night, and are in the running for a good day.

KFFOREVER Wed 12-Jun-13 06:58:35

Good morning all.

We too are still on size 1 teats. I dont even keep track on what ds feeds. He usually has 4/5 ozs every 3hrs.

Last night ds slept from 10-3.30 which is a big improvement. I have a sore throat and headache so im feeling rubbish.

Eigmum Wed 12-Jun-13 07:56:59

Hey all, the big news here is first night without 3 am feed. Will it last, who knows, but given I got to sleep from midnight to 7 am I am delighted! I know some of you have 7 to 7 babies already but we are a long way off that. A few nights of this would make it all a lot easier!

vjhist85 Wed 12-Jun-13 08:20:25

This morning we have feet! We are going from being very VERY excited about it to very VERY cross that we can't coordinate ourselves sufficiently to grab them and eat them.

Dd refused dream feed last night but still went til 4.30. Might this be because she had 3 bottle feeds yesterday with dm? They were all ebm but do they take more that way than from the boob? It meant she had no formula at all yesterday instead of usual 2x5oz, but no obvious negative impact on length of sleep.

Eig if the worselet is anything to go by, you're in for an almost overnight improvement. She went from not sleeping through to just sleeping through without any pre-amble or discussion about it. Fingers crossed for you.

VJ you have feet!!! I'm jealous. I'm going to have to start pointing dd's out to her.

mariamerryweather Wed 12-Jun-13 09:10:32

Hello all, was hoping I could join you although I am late to the 'party': DS was 12 weeks yesterday and I seem to recall things get easier from now (although as my DD is 6 I've forgotten pretty much everything and have to refer to pictures of her at his age to remind myself what I'm supposed to be doing)!

Lovely to read about all your gorgeous babies, am very impressed by eco's mountain climber, especially as I am currently eating Jaffa cakes in bed.

Am also very impressed by those expressing as I can't seem to find the time to do it and I'm sure I was well into it by now with DD. Any tips would be gratefully received as I'm reaching the point where I'd like to be able to drink more than one glass of wine at an appropriately timed gap between feeds!

Hope you all have a lovely day.

plonko Wed 12-Jun-13 10:10:31

Worse I believe we share a parenting philosophy. They're progressing quickly, gaining weight, seem such contented little things so let's just keep doing what we're doing.

Vj feet! Yay! DS looks at his and laughs if I 'clap' them together when I change his nappy, but his still very much a hands man. Does feet suing mean they work through wind even better? Just thinking logistically...

Something we're on 210 ml five times a day, and have been since 6 weeks! He's happy and produces many a wet or dirty nappy though so I'm not thinking about weaning yet. Well, except for ogling highchairs online. I think the advise is really nothing but milk until 17 weeks at the very earliest, but I know my dp started solids at 3 months. My hv said shed be round between three and four months to discuss weaning so if I see her ill squeeze some info out.

Eig oooh good news! Formula definitely seems to make them windier as far as I can tell. And my baby needs a little coaxing to sleep through. Goes down easily enough but requires cuddles after his 6am bottle cos I'm bloody not ready to get up then!

Leni are you still on mam teats? Size two might make him choke less because he doesn't have to work so hard/gulp any air. You'll move on to them eventually anyway so perhaps worth a go? (And I'm sorry but I'm watching the voice blush)

I feel like crap Today. 3 and a half weeks of spotting and now the heaviest period anyones ever had ever. banging headache to match! He's been asleep for the last two and a half hours so I really ought to get him up and fed but I just want to wallow.

plonko Wed 12-Jun-13 10:11:06

Meant to add, hi maria!

ecofreckle Wed 12-Jun-13 10:24:30

Hi and welcome maria - how do you you think we got to the top of that mountain? Jaffa power that's how! And lots of them ;-)
Eig and vj good to hear of your extra sleep portions. It's a nice surprise isn't it? And I'll echo what worse said; dd has been doing two night feeds for weeks and weeks (2 ish and 5ish) and then without warning or preamble just went to slurping sleeping through these last 3 nights.
plonko period? ug. I'm not looking forward. I've enjoyed a year without that particular beast. You normally suffer from headaches (or even migraine) during periods? Me too. Sucks. 4Head is what I use for headaches as am breastfeeding.
maria in terms of expressing, I've been expressing 3 - 4 oz (5 on ocassion) an hour ish after her first morning feed (0800 or 0900 normally). This has been wasted for approx 7 weeks as dd refused bottle til just last week when we were on hols. dd is 11 weeks and we found success with tommee shitee tippee bottles with size 2 teats but I know this isn't everyone's cup of tea. Yesterday at KIT day I expressed at the time when dh gave dd a bottle so as not to screw up my day time supply. I think we intend to use the expressed milk for early morning feeds if I want a lie in, for when dh takes dd out or for when I go out (although that is a theoretical idea at present as I don't 'go out' go out yet really). I just read on kellymom (good evidence based advice but obvs very pro BF) that you shouldn't ever shake ebm, but instead swirl it tornado style to mix up the creamy bits. Shaking can ruin the milk structure of some such science stuff.
Have a good day everyone. The sun has gone in Norfolk. I'm home alone as dh has taken dd to bounce and rhyme at the library (he starts at noon one day a week) so here I am. Not reading a magazine or pottering in the garden but giving the kitchen a spring clean and ironing the frou frou frocks that dh's family have bought dd and piffling around on MN

chickabilla Wed 12-Jun-13 11:24:41

Hi, can I join in? DD is officially a Feb baby but she was 4 weeks early - surprise! - she was due 22 March. She's sleep-feeding on me at the moment but will be rudely awakened to pick her brother up from pre-school soon. She hates the pram!

We have just moved from down south to northants so feeling a bit lonely; need to be brave and talk to sone Midlands mummies!

OodPi Wed 12-Jun-13 13:15:49

Hi everyone just sticking my head in to say hello! Hope everyone is doing well.

We've had an eventful time since I lost track of the thread. Ds was admitted to hospital at 7 weeks old and they diagnosed meningitis (within an hour!) and we spent 2 weeks on children's ward ( hence me losing the thread!). He had some pretty heavy duty antibiotics and although we are pretty sure he's not had any brain damage hes now had 6 weeks of diarrhoea and a (hopefully temporary) dairy intolerance so my diet is now v controlled.
He's having a hearing test this afternoon & paeds check up tomorrow.
He only finally had his 8 week jabs yesterday (@ nearly 14 weeks) and has swollen painful legs and an allergic reaction to the plaster!

plonko Wed 12-Jun-13 13:39:44

Chick welcome! Four weeks early eh? Naughty!

Always nice to see more people on here but I'm struggling to remember who's who! Maybe we need a new stats thread? or I just need to get through the baby brain phase

Ood lovely to have you back! That sounds awful, I hope he's on the mend now. And how are you? I believe when you were last on here you were still recovering?

Eco it's not great, I've always had light ish ones with hellish pmt, this ones something else altogether! I need to go to the post office to get ds's passport sorted but am slightly worried about the loooooong hilly walk. Hope you enjoyed your peaceful morning even if you did chores. Alone time is something of a novelty now eh?

mariamerryweather Wed 12-Jun-13 13:40:23

Thanks for the welcomes and hello chickabilla it's nice to not be the only newbie. So useful to hear how you are dealing with expressing eco, morning must be the time, I just need to get organised somehow.

And OodPi, we haven't 'spoken' before but unmumsnetty hugs to you and your DS, and all the best for tomorrow's check up. flowers A post like yours puts everything into perspective, I can't imagine how worried you must have been, to say how horrible for you doesn't cover it really.

Better go, DS is moving from low level grumbling to 'pick me up now'.

StormyBrid Wed 12-Jun-13 13:52:02

Hello Ood, good to see you again! Glad your son's doing okay now. Must've been terrifying. He's certainly kept you on your toes, hasn't he?

Welcome to the new people.

eco sounds like your DD did what mine did a few weeks ago. Just suddenly didn't bother waking up for a feed in the small hours. If only she'd been eating enough in the day! We're thinking of giving her opportunity to sleep through again next week though, assuming she keeps polishing off four ounce bottles during the day. The plan will be dream feed around 11.30 and then just see how she goes.

We got the local paper yesterday as we entered DD in the best baby competition. She's clearly not going to win, as it's postal votes only, and will doubtless be won by some child with a large family who all buy the local paper every day. None of my family buy it ever, so winning seems a bit unlikely. But I was having a flick through and, by Christ, there are some dreadful names! No triple barrelled ones, but a few kids had been lumbered with hyphenated first names and hyphenated surnames. And far too many parents in this city appear to be unable to spell. I'm tempted to keep the paper and refer to it in five years to see if any of DD's schoolmates are in there.

worse glad you mentioned trapped wind and formula - we've had a few days of drinking a lot more than usual, and she's being very wriggly and seems uncomfortable sometimes, in a windy sort of way. So I guess the formula's to blame for that. Still farting like a champion too. Keeps scoring full marks for tone and volume, but needs to work on the smell.

Re: smiles. So far they are generally bestowed in response to face kisses (if accompanied by sound effects), tummy raspberries, standing up, pretending to be an aeroplane, and looking at that cute little baby in the mirror. Had a new one this morning though! DD was in the door bouncer, and the neurotic cat came over to say hello. They bumped foreheads, and DD had a feel of the fur, and grinned hugely. Then the little cat came over and did the same thing, and that got a smile too. So I guess she likes cats. Good thing too!

No weighing at the clinic for us today; the usual clinic's closed and the next closest one is on alternate Wednesdays and not this week. Reckon we've passed 11lbs now though.

Good news yesterday: I'm getting a niece in October! A nephew would've been good, but nieces are pretty cool (and I should know, I've already got two of them). So I won't have to worry about finding somewhere else to offload all the pink baby clothes. Bonus!

somethingbeginningwith Wed 12-Jun-13 14:54:21

Hi Maria and Chika

Oh Ood you've had a time of it, haven't you? I'm glad everything's going well for you now smile

Plonko It would be good if you have any worthwhile info on weaning once your HV's been. Mine's not coming again until 6 months so I'm playing it by ear until then. DS has been on 210ml 5 times a day, like yours, from 8 weeks and I'm sure he's over a stone by now so I'm going to stick at it, he seems to be happy with that.

Stormy how cute that cat cuddles make her smile. Pretending to be an aeroplane does it for DS too, as well as nibbling toes and playing the drums on his tummy. Congrats on a new niece! I'm getting a niece in August, can't wait to buy spoil her with lots of girly dresses and such.

Me and DS braved a 5 mile round trip walk today to do a bit of shopping, up hills and all sorts. I say we braved, he slept the whole way there and the whole way back. He's now merrily chatting to his toys while I recover on the sofa with a cuppa.

chickabilla Wed 12-Jun-13 15:02:27

Thank you smile. Yes, 4 weeks early was not very helpful asmy waters broke the day after we put the house on the market! She's a pickle but she is fine and chubbing up nicely now so that's the main thing!

Ood how scary. I'm glad things seem better now and hope there are no long-term effects. We had major issues with our DS2 but he is 3 today and you would never know except that he has some cracking scars.

Wind - DD is the queen of smelly, loud man-like trumping. She has iron supplements so I am blaming those but I'm sure everyone thinks it is me, not the cute little baby!

KFFOREVER Wed 12-Jun-13 15:49:12

Welcome to all the newbies.

ood gosh what your little one has been through sounds horrible. I hope you lo is recovering well.

plonko post birth periods are sooo painful. I wonder how long it takes to settle down? Im very tempted to go back on the pill or coil and hoping to reduce the pain and bleeding.

stormy def keep a copy of the paper for memories. Theres nothing stopping you from buying stacks of the local paper and sending of the votes yourself. smile

Seems like we had a bit of a change in naps today. Ds slept for over 2hrs this lunchtime. Lovely. Hes having another nap now so will see how long this lasts.

Congratulations to those who are going to be an auntie. This time you can enjoy a newborn baby without the sleepless nights and feeding issues. (assuming our lo's will be sleeping through and having solids by then).

leniwhite Wed 12-Jun-13 17:23:56

Ood - really hope you get a more smooth rude from now on, meningitis... christ, that must have been scary confused

We're using Mam and Dr Brown teats now, I'm trying to express more than bf because the itching is driving me nuts. I've scratched holes in my skin!

I've not had another period since that one huge one just over a month back, not sure if that was just the Levonelle though.

DS did some proper laughs today whilst we played 'stand up sit down'. He flips between grinning and crying far too easily though, it's a fine line... Feeling a bit disgruntled with OH today hmm

Hello newbies, we're a big gaggle now!

leniwhite Wed 12-Jun-13 17:24:33

Ood of course I didn't mean a smooth rude - that's something completely different!

OodPi Wed 12-Jun-13 19:17:37

grin at a smooth rude!

plonko my recovery has plateaued , I'm still on one crutch and my pelvis isn't too painful but my hips still collapsing, my knees both go now and my left arms has given up at each joint ( was told to use one crutch on that side). Also still have the haematoma lump and pain around it!

So yes ds has been causing a bit of stress but he's such a sweetie!
His hearing tests were fine today but back again in a few months to be 100% sure.

Nice to see the new faces and the old. Don't think I've enough time to keep up but will try & pop in & out to catch up.

SoYo Wed 12-Jun-13 19:40:48

Jeez Ood that's awful, you've had a terrible time. Hope you're ok! Great to see you back <offers extra thick coated dark choc biccie>

Hi Chicka & Maria

DD is full of smiles despite the terrible Cornish weather. The biggest ones today have been for her new monkey toy that she's been grabbing with two hands. A new skill. If I was picking skills I'd have gone for waking up less than twice a night minimum, not having prolonged BFs for comfort only & giving me sore nips, napping in the house but not on me or not puking everywhere - what a picky mummy!

You lot have some seriously cute babies, I'll try to get one of DD up soon.

We're having a junk food & 24 night here, life doesn't get much better!

pudtat Wed 12-Jun-13 19:41:15

Ood so glad to hear from you though not what you have to say iykwim? Pleased DS is on the mend at last, and hope he continues to make progress. Also that you can finally start to heal, the stress of the past few weeks cannot have helped. Hugs.

Hello new people! Blimey, I will struggle to keep up, but nice to see you all.

Weigh in today. DS has gained another 6oz since thurs which is good and sees us heading back up to the 9th percentile line again... Come on! Mind you, he is obviously growing as today I had to go through the box of stuff labeled 3-6mth and get it washed and ready to wear as his feet no longer fit in the bottom of his 3m baby grows. What a big boy I have - nice to be able to say that. smile

Jabs this pm also. Seemed ok if a little grouchy, but went into meltdown after last feed. Paused briefly when dunked in bath, but finally calmed when tucked up. Hope he feels better in the morning, poor poppet. hmm

Right, need to pour water on cous cous - my kind of dinner prep!smile

Evening all - newbies, oldies and everyone in between. A special hi to Ood as omg you really have been put through it. Wishing you and your ds a speedy recovery and no long term ill effects.

Lovely lovely day here, as after the mother of all poonamis (in the middle of my lunch... thanks dd) the tiddler brightened up no end and decided to be just plain cute for the rest of the day, rather than her usual high maintenance self. I'm loving this stage, she is so much fun.

Leni - your smooth rude had me snort tea grin. Love it!

Right, the rain has stopped so I get the fun job of taking the furry children out for a last walk whilst DH is on baby duty. It's all go here in the mad house.

vjhist85 Wed 12-Jun-13 21:22:12

Ood- nice to 'meet' you, I'm a bit of a newbie smile so glad DS is ok- my cousin's little one went down with meningitis a couple of weeks ago, he's just had his audiologist appointment and things look ok at the moment. That was scary enough for me as we're quite close so I can't even begin to imagine what you've been through.

Today I made some friends smile coffee after baby swimming, similarly to this thread, it's really nice to chat to people with little ones at the same stage. I guess this is why so many people say they meet their friends for life through their kids.

We've just introduced a story to the bedtime routine-until now dd hasn't tolerated any delay to food and bed. We read 'what a busy baby' (did anyone else get this free?) and she gave me a lump in my throat when she was smiling and chatting to the pictures of babies and trying to reach out and touch them. Lovely lovely.

I have THE fartiest baby in the world today. I'm attributing it to me eating stupid amounts of veg- I ordered a£15 veg box then DH had to go away with work, we're going away at the weekend so I'm trying to get through it all. Baby girl is producing some trumps that my teenage brother would be proud of.

StormyBrid Wed 12-Jun-13 21:49:17

vj free books? Where do we get free books from?

vjhist85 Wed 12-Jun-13 22:23:48

We got them when we registered dd but they come through bookstart- have a look at the website (can't link on phone but easily googleable)

vjhist85 Wed 12-Jun-13 22:27:33

Just had a proper look- its the bookstart baby pack. Apparently every child should get them in the first year, guess it depends on local authority as to how, some do it through HVs? I'd go to the library and ask them. We're going to do a charity shop sweep tomorrow, about time DD's book collection was started in earnest if its ever going to have a chance of rivalling mine!

ecofreckle Thu 13-Jun-13 04:19:36

So it turns out three nights of sleeping through do not a habit make! :-)
ood lovely to hear from you. We'd all been wondering how you'd been getting on. You've had a lot to contend with. All on the up now fx. Lots of love from the flat lands.
worse your afternoon post poo sounds lovely. We've had a few like that where dd is so darn cute and coo ridden. So lovely. I'm thinking 3 to 6 months will be a really lovely phase I probably just tempted fate
My free morning was good in the end. Lots of jobs done which freed my brain up for an afternoon of being entirely baby focussed without trying to juggle baby and stuff. Weigh in showed dd to be 13lb 6oz now which means nothing to anyone, but she's doing ok centile wise and that's always nice to hear. I asked hv if it was safe yet to put a toy into the crib for dd to suckle and cuddle. The hv waftily asked if I'd ever considered hanging a mobile over her crib. Even for the most prodigiously talented baby standing up to suck and cuddle a mobile is a big ask....

KFFOREVER Thu 13-Jun-13 06:54:25

Wow its quiet on here so hoping its a good sign the babies slept through.

Im a zombie. Was up so many times last night i couldnt count. I have a bloody cold to contend with now. I cant even sneeze or blow my nose without waking ds up. Im feeling a little sorry for myself. Its been such a shitty week with illness and no bloody help from that horrible lazy witch mil.

pudtat Thu 13-Jun-13 07:23:00

KF, have you considered dramatically taking to your bed and just demanding that she wait on you hand and foot help out? Perhaps the drama of it all would get through?

Morning all - hope you all had lovely sleep-ful nights and are too busy cuddling gorgeous milky babies to fart about be on MN grin

Moi, I'm in a good mood. Can you tell?! DH is at home which meant I got a whole hour of me time to do some training with Mr personal trainer man. Actually I say training, but the poor man is so terrified of unpredictable post partum events (like one'e pelvic floor dropping out I assume) that he won't allow anything more taxing than a bit of power walking and the odd stretch, but hey, it was a break. Given it has been ooohhh three months or so since I have had any me time I grasped the opportunity with both hands, and enjoyed my power walk no end. I'll be doing another, much tougher one with madam later, to get her to sleep, which I won't have to pay for, but we'll gloss over that.

Hope you are all taking your tiddlers shopping to get a father's day card for sunday. DH is v excited. He keeps dropping hints.... grin

WingDefence Thu 13-Jun-13 10:18:25

Oh my goodness, so much to catch up on and so little time to do it in!

Er, where do I start - Ood, I am so glad to hear of your DS's recovery. I cannot begin to imagine how awful a time that must have been for you. Hope he continues to recover perfectly well.

leni don't beat yourself up about it if you have to stop expressing etc. I do remember reading somewhere though that the amount you express is no indication of how much your boobs are producing so don't necessarily think your boobs are broken.

pud glad to hear that DS is heading back up the centiles!

Eig well done on the sleep smile DD is back up to five hour stretches now hurrah! She had 3oz of ff last night at 9-9:30 as she hadn't gone down for long at 8:30 (which seems to be when she's tired enough to go to bed) and went from 10 till 3:25. Happy with that...

I think I'm going to try to get her into a routine of DS to bed 7-7:30 then DD ff bottle and bed some point around 8ish and see what happens from there.

something you should really try to wean much before 4 months as their tiny tummies aren't ready for it. Talk to your HV about it though?

stormy you MUST tell us some of the awful names now! grin

plonko I've not had my post birth period yet but I'm dreading it! I have had a few spots recently so I think my hormones may be getting back to normal. I still need to sort out getting the coil but as the family planning clinic is only Thurs eve 6-8pm (to catch all the teenagers apparently shock!) and my GP won't fit it I'm screwed not, unfortunately at the moment.

Hi too to the newbies, KF,vj et al!

leniwhite Thu 13-Jun-13 11:57:30

Wing - i decided to express only today and see if he gets enough. Woke up to find OH had fallen asleep with DS on him without giving him the bloody bottle, but I didn't realise this until we'd gone 2 hours beyond breakfast time and I couldn't understand why DS was distraught shock not very happy with OH right now... Have asked him if we can go to counselling and he said no. It feels like we genuinely want to smack each other lately.

Eco we've had toys in the cot since the start! DS doesn't seem to know they're there though since they're not in his eyeline. Mobiles seem stupidly expensive?

Pud I feel your pain, I've had earache for ages and DS woke up lots in the night so I feel really rough today too hmm

Omg I've just noticed DS has wee ALL UP HIS TEE SHIRT!!!

StormyBrid Thu 13-Jun-13 13:42:05

leni I don't know quite how to phrase this, and I don't want to come across as interfering, but. You're not happy, you want to try counselling, and your OH point blank refused? I would be very wary of getting a mortgage with him right now. And I know smacking each other isn't actually acceptable but I'd be sorely tempted to - he forgot to feed his child. How does anyone manage to forget that?

Wing some selected highlights of the baby names:
Braxton (wtf, why would you do this? It's like calling your baby fake labour pain)
Keegan (isn't that a football player?)
Nevaeh (there are two of these, one -Rose, the other -Angel)
Lincon (I'm assuming conceived in Lincoln by parents who can't spell)
Iyla (someone's obviously never seen Isla written down)
Omar Sharif (this isn't actually a bad name, it just made me laugh when I saw it)
Far too many -Maes to count (and even a couple of -Mais, but no -Mays)
Bentley Smirk (not a stupid name, I just love that surname)
Neave (oh ffs, if you don't know how to spell it, ask someone! Don't just guess!)
Ambur (ditto)
Aksel (this is starting to hurt my brain now)
Junior Nobbs ("What shall we call our child, so that he does not get the shit kicked out of him?")

somethingbeginningwith Thu 13-Jun-13 13:43:26

wing DS seems happy enough with milk so I wouldn't really consider weaning before 4 months. It is exciting to think about though smile all the cleaning up of mush on faces we'll be doing! Ask me again if I still find it exciting in a month or so though and I'm sure I'll have a different response!

leni I feel where you're coming from with OH troubles. We had a bit of an emotional meltdown at midnight last night where he got so much off his chest because he says we don't show each other much affection anymore and he feels like we're losing each other so we've decided a mini-break is needed and more time spent together being a couple. It's difficult sometimes to remember that's what we were before we became a family and we shouldn't lose that. I hope OH has redeemed himself from this morning. Men, eh?

worse father's day cards for daddy and all 3 grandpas have been purchased. Although I'm annoyed at father's day as DS was due on March 2nd but was 13 days late so I missed out on mother's day this year, so OH likes to show off about having a father's day! I still beat him though as my birthday is the day before grin And personal training? You're braver than me! Sounds fun though and glad you're having some time for you!

DS woke me up this morning at 9am shock chattering to himself and giving me the biggest smile when I went to see him. He's been in a great mood all day and is now dozing which gives me time to read the new Dan Brown book.

Oh Leni - it's tough with a new baby, a massive adjustment, and you and your DH wouldn't be the first to occasionally lose it a bit with each other. Sleep deprivation, lack of time as a couple, worry, general chaos as there just aren't enough hours in the day to do stuff... all of that can really stretch a relationship. Add the stress of house hunting, and you have one big melting pot. Maybe take a step back from the house thing for a week or so and take the pressure off yourselves? Just a thought. Big hug though...

Stormy love the names. I feel really quite ordinary and boring now, which is probably because I am grin. Way to go to Junior Nobb's parents though. That child is going to need knuckles of steel to survive the school yard politically incorrect statement as obviously all school yard disputes are resolved through reasoning, discussion and a handshake

Something I just managed a mother's day card by the skin of my teeth, and was well pleased with myself. Apparently DD selected and bought the card herself. Obviously she would have written it too, had she not been having a nap at the time wink

Hmmm, her littlest-ship is on a nap refusal today, which I can tell is going to prove a little wearing. She is also ridiculously hungry. One and a half feeds ahead of schedule already. Most strange... confused

Anypants Thu 13-Jun-13 14:49:55

Stormy Junior Nobbs? <snort>
I'm very stuck for Father's day. My Dad just had a birthday and I forgot to withold a present for Sunday. My -OH DD got me flowers for Mother's day but DH didn't remember to get his own Mum anything so I insisted she got the flowers sad I therfore got nowt. So how do I return the favour? hmm

OodPi Thu 13-Jun-13 15:34:54

worsester how old? Are you at the 12 or 16 week growth spurt?

Ood - she's 14wks, and obviously not read the manual!

Joking aside, I think she's just got herself in a pickle today through not napping. Her 3pm feed has been firmly rejected and she's now fallen asleep on me. Yay!

StormyBrid Thu 13-Jun-13 15:51:29

There's a sixteen week growth spurt too? I'll look forward to that.

Can I have a bit of a rant? Am so tempted to give the man a right ding round the earhole today. He doesn't seem to realise that babies sometimes need to be actively entertained, and that if they're shouting because they're bored they're not going to stop if you just hold them. Or that, actually, I'd quite like to sleep in until lunchtime too. Or that it's really not fair that his stretch of on-duty hours are while she's asleep, whereas mine are while she's awake.

On the plus side, DD has mastered grabbing Bunny and hitting herself in the face with him. Progress!

Anypants Thu 13-Jun-13 17:03:59

Stormy - you're not wrong. DD was crying the other night when i'd just gone to bed and DH comes in and says 'don't worry, i'll see to her' and then went into the bathroom to have the bath he'd just run. So I went to her... envy
Aaaaand, every time she cries it's because 'she must be hungry'. Excellent - 'preciate your help.

Eigmum Thu 13-Jun-13 17:04:31

Hi ood!

Proper post later but mini eig and I have been to the baby spa in Kensington, will have to sort out how to post photo later amazing! And they weighed her and she is 6.04 kg!

vjhist85 Thu 13-Jun-13 18:48:07

It's clearly useless OH time again. I'm currently trying to decide just how cross I'm going to be with DH when I get downstairs from doing bedtime. He's been away all week again, and since he's got home he's done nothing. Dd is going through a stage where she's only happy sitting up. Not reclining, not cuddling, not lying, but only sitting up. I tell him this. He lies down with her (because he's lazy and basically thinks parenting involves sitting on the sofa with baby nestled into crook of arm). She cries. He hands to me saying 'she's crying'. No shit Sherlock.

How angry I will be depends entirely on whether he is sat on his arse or tidying up when I get downstairs.

vjhist85 Thu 13-Jun-13 18:54:41

Oh and today dd demonstrated her disdain for tummy time most resolutely by working out how to roll onto her back from her tummy! Can't believe we're there already! I kept thinking it was accidental, poor girl had to prove herself about 5 times before I believed her!

vj the correct answer to 'she's crying' from your dh is.... 'oh bad luck, on your shift as well grin' ... as you swan off to do important stuff.

StormyBrid Thu 13-Jun-13 19:42:07

What is it with them thinking one can parent most effectively when horizontal? The man knows full well DD doesn't believe in lying down unless it's naptime and yet he still tries it. And then when she complains he doesn't do anything.

I think he must've sensed my ranting somehow though, he's been much better the rest of the afternoon. Although he did manage to totally forget how to get an entire bottle of milk down her at bedtime (it's not that hard, really; you just have to swaddle her and feed her in bed if she starts bitching). And I still can't persuade him to take her to the shops with him, so we have nothing in for tea. Bah. I may have to retire to bed with a packet of biscuits.

OodPi Thu 13-Jun-13 19:46:11

eig I've seen the baby spa on FB!

KFFOREVER Thu 13-Jun-13 20:09:30

Ive had a breakthrough with the mil. She cooked dinner.yay.

For once im not having a bash at my dh today well the day isnt over yet. Our relationship has changed since ds. Its funny as its supposed to be the happiest time in our relationship yet its been the most miserable time. Sleep deprivation at being a sahm has a lot to do with it (especially if you was working before dc).

eig - baby spa? Please explain more. Is it something mummies can enjoy too. Im abit miffed my ds gets pampered with massages and long baths more than me.

Well done mini vj. Soon they will be crawling. It goes quick.

leni dont be too harsh on your dh for falling asleep. Im a bad mummy for doing something similar last night. Ds was stirring so made a bottle and left it to cool. I must have drifted off to sleep as next thing i know ds is crying and his bottle is very very cold. Oopps.

KFFOREVER Thu 13-Jun-13 20:15:32

X post. stormy my dh is the same. I have yet to persuade him to go out with ds.

Ok it didnt last long. I escaped to the room to sleep. Dh comes in with ds saying ds wants to sleep. Ds will just have a short nap so why not put him in his cot or bouncer. Why disturb me. Grrr.

Anypants Thu 13-Jun-13 20:17:14

Ooh ooh - i've got a good one. DH gets home from work then sits on laptop planning his route tomorrow (coach driver). DD is in bouncy chair next to DH while Mummy is in kitchen slaving over dinner. DH says 'oh dear' and indicates a bottom explosion by blowing a raspberry. So I scoop her up and change her then put her back and retreat to kitchen. 2 mins later 'pffffffft' 'and again' he says. 'Can you do it?' I ask, hopefully. (shouty) 'i've got to finish my route'. Oh, sorry. Just me that has to drop everything. FFS.

vjhist85 Thu 13-Jun-13 20:29:16

My very favourite is:

Me: could you change her please?

DH: Ok then, but I am in a bit of a rush.

Either do, or don't. Don't agree to do something whilst simultaneously pointing out what an inconvenience it's going to be. You don't get bloody martyr points for parenting.

I got downstairs to DH looking smug, sat on his bum, saying 'I've washed the bottles'. By which he means he's put them in the sink with hot soapy water. Our plug leaks slowly, so soon they'll just be languishing at the bottom of the sink covered in soap scum and I'll need to start all over again. But I should be impressed. Because he cleaned the bottles.

StormyBrid Thu 13-Jun-13 21:52:30

Anyone else occasionally get the feeling we should say to hell with the lot of them and try out lesbianism?

Anypants Thu 13-Jun-13 22:02:16

Ah yes but haven't they done their bit already by providing us with the DCs? hmm

WingDefence Thu 13-Jun-13 22:41:41

Oh blimey you lot have OHs that need kicking up the a**e sad

I went to a MN Local meet up today! (I actually organised it as I'm a Local Ambassador for my area blush) It was really nice. Hurrah for MN. DD slept through the whole thing starting before I left at 12 until I got into the car to come home at 3. She must have really needed it after being awake a fair amount this morning.

She downed her 3oz ff at 8:30 earlier and then promptly fell asleep on the changing mat! She likes it down on the floor, more than being in the bouncer, and can lie and chat/wriggle away for ages an she just got more and more tired until we heard a bit of thumb sucking and then she'd zonked out grin I took her upstairs at 9:30, topped her up with some boob and we will see how she goes tonight...

Hope you all manage to get good night's sleep!

SoYo Thu 13-Jun-13 22:51:19

I'm having a shitty day. Didn't get more than 90mins consecutive sleep last night so feel like crap, every meal I've had today I've had to breastfeed through. My back's really sore again from leaning over during night feeds as its the only way to get a successful transfer. My nipples are agony as she's alternating between nipping, feeding & comfort sucking (which she's done a lot of today as its been the only way to stop the screaming). I've just whinged about this all to DH as I'm on the verge of meltdown & I'm guessing he didn't know which helpful supportive thing to say as he opted for saying fuck all and going to lie on the sofa and read his book while I try for the third time to feed her to sleep. Some days I fucking hate all of this despite having the most beautiful daughter, I would just love to not have demands on me every bloody minute of the day.

stormy - hell no! Share my kitchen with another woman? Now that really would be too much.... it's bad enough when my DM visits!

I know it's all a bit of light hearted joshing really, but it's worth sorting the little things before they turn into big things iykwim. Nicely mind! No throwing the baby bath at their head tempting though that may be grin

Home alone, and bl**dy grateful that despite a belly full of wind the tiddler has managed a full bottle and settled down for the night. Let's hope she's planning on a good long stretch.

pudtat Fri 14-Jun-13 02:34:28

Aw SoYo. Hugs. It is really hard some days and it doesn't make you a bad mummy or mean you love your LO less to sometimes feel that the binary nature of parenthood (either on or off) can be a bit much and if you could have just a couple of hours which were truly just for you it'd be so much better...

Could your DH not take her for s bit even if she is screamy? If she has been well fed then she won't starve for the sake of a couple of hours and you would prob feel much better for getting out for a walk, or a coffee and a read of the papers or something on your own. No baby died of crying and your DH won't either for a bit.

Longer term, I'm guessing you've tried various strategies to move away from having to feed to sleep? I know transfers have been an issue for you from the get go. Wonder if your DH would be prepared to really help you revisit this as it sounds like you are suffering with way more than just lack of sleep. Finding a way to share the load a bit sounds important, ESP as from memory yours is a bottle refuser so you can't even leave him with some ebm and bugger off for a bit?

Sympathy if nothing else. brewthanks

leniwhite Fri 14-Jun-13 02:42:39

Argh! Who's messed with the water? All our OHs have reverted to new baby state and LOs no longer sleeping through!!

My 9-5 sleeper is no more. It's getting half an hour shorter every night confused

Anypants Fri 14-Jun-13 05:01:32

I fully sympathise soyo. I find myself thinking the same things but realise that my rational judgement has been compromised by lack of sleep and resist the urge to walk out. Last night, I was quite close to putting DD in her basket (awake, not crying but refusing to sleep) and getting in the car in my jimjams and driving off round the corner, without a word to DH, just to see what he'd do if he had to. But I didn't. May try tonight if DD is the same.
I'm sure it's the four month sleep regression (at 3 and half months) but why has the bedtime routine stopped working? For nearly a week now she's practically asleep after her envy bath/feed/story then 'pop' - her eyes open and I spend a hour getting nowhere until I give in and feed her back to sleep, which I don't want to do, obviously. Anyone got the solution? confused

ecofreckle Fri 14-Jun-13 05:02:45

soyo just wanted to say a big hello to you. Your day sounds crappy and no wonder you feel crappy too. With such regular feeding overnight could you try sleeping in another room and have dh bring her in for food and take her away for settling? I know transfers are a massive thing in your house as pud remembered so maybe the bringing in and out thing is too big an ask but what about delegating the settling part of night feeds to him?
I know absolutely the trapped feeling of. responsibility you refer to. Totally stifling sometimes.

Anypants Fri 14-Jun-13 05:03:03

Random envy in there - don't know where he came from...

ecofreckle Fri 14-Jun-13 05:11:24

Posted early in error as dd on shoulder did violent jerk head butt as is her wont.
That feeling of stifle lifted soyo when I'd had a chunk of sleep a couple of times and when dd had accepted a bottle a couple of times. As with most of these baby issues it's only temporary madness. Sending lots of love your way soyo.

WingDefence Fri 14-Jun-13 06:10:57

SoYo what a horrible day. I really hope it's just a growth spurt and you got a good stretch of sleep last night. It makes me feel bad at announcing...

DD has slept from 9:50-6am! I love her thumbs as she obviously does too! I, on the other hand, woke at 2, 3, 3:40, 4, 5 and have been awake since 5:30 because I assumed she wake up each time I heard her sucking her thumb.
I actually got up to sit on the bed watching and waiting for her to wake up at 5 and 5:30 and she's just gone to slee on my boob so want even properly awake when I got her up at 6 hmm But my boobs were boulders!

Sorry to those who have had bad nights. I hope you don't mind me being happy and yawning this morning grin

KFFOREVER Fri 14-Jun-13 06:20:48

soyo and any big hugs from me. I think we have to take each day as it comes or even hour by hour. Some days are good and some days are bad. Sleep deprivation is the best form of torture.

Ah crap we have yet to face the 4month sleep regression. For the past 2 nights we (actually just me as dh tends to give ds to me) have had a tough time putting him to sleep. I usually have to rock him very fast for a good 30-45mins after a massage. I really wanted to avoid rocking but desperate measures need to be taken. So any im hoping it is the 4month sleep regression thing but a couple of weeks early. Who am i kidding we will not have a good nights sleep for another 10years.

Ive been up since 2am with this stupid cold and now a cough. As i was going to drift off to sleep ds wakes up.

KFFOREVER Fri 14-Jun-13 06:26:44

wing well done bet you feel great. Maybe the problem is not our dc's sleep but our inability (motherly instincts) to sleep through small sounds our dcs make.

Morning ladies. So sorry to hear about the tough days and nights for some of you. What's worked here is getting my DH involved in the evenings, and boy do I miss that when he is away. Regardless of whether she has a bottle or a boob feed last thing , he takes her away and settles her. I get that time to unwind, and go to bed. He wasn't keen to start with, but it has now become a bit of daddy time, and he is rather proud of of the fact that she recognises the routine and automatically snuggles up to him when she's pink eyed and over tired.

From what he tells me that's a fairly normal arrangement for his mates at work as well, so for those of you struggling in the evenings delegate to dad. You need a break and some sleep or you'll keel over.

Bit under par myself this morning as windy issues had the tiddler wriggling and whinging from about 3.30am onwards. She'd didn't properly wake, but I did, and stayed that way until 5am when I decided to feed her and cuddle her for an hour. Seemed to work as she's quiet now, and hopefully will stay that way for a bit.

Parents arriving today to house sit and then off to Devon tomorrow. Excited and nervous in equal measure. Excited because, yay, it's a holiday. Nervous because it's a looonnggg drive with a small person, and my parents, although lovely, have an unfailing ability to trash something every time they visit. To date this has ranged from breaking a sash window, to flooding the bathroom. What is more every mishap is invariably my fault!!! You've gotta love em.

Eigmum Fri 14-Jun-13 08:55:02

Yeah WD! Great news.

We had regression here and full scale meltdown at 4.30am so had to feed her! Going to decide what my strategy is for getting a bottle a day back into her routine as I need one block break as baby and toddler and no break = exhausted mummy sith limited time for other little one. If that is still a failure when she hits 4 months then we are bottles all the way! I have told madam so it's her choice!! Main issue is the boob feeds from basically 2pm til 8pm seem to be constant and it's killing them!

Eigmum Fri 14-Jun-13 08:57:21

The baby spa is great. It's just for babies, the have a lovely feeding room, mini pods for babies under 8 weeks and a big pool for babies above 8 weeks. They wear this funny neck brace so they have freedom in the water. Dd loved it. Also a lovely feeding room with pillows and a bottle warmer and washing sterilizing area. After the swim the baby gets a massage. Lovely atmosphere and very chilled baby afterwards but v hungry from all the exercise!

leniwhite Fri 14-Jun-13 10:10:49

Soyo I totally sympathise - it's just relentless sometimes. I really didn't forsee just how much having no time for the most basic of things one needs to take care of oneself can impact. God knows how people do this without even a useless DH.

On the 5 days where OH is only here for 2 hours in the morning and an hour in the eve I don't see anyone other than DS and feel very isolated stuck in this routine I know will carry on until at least October. I get up, watch crap TV all day or go to the same shops as an 'exciting outing', because I just don't have the energy to go further afield on my own.

Do you have friends close by Soyo? Maybe at least some different adult company or someone who can take the reins even for 30mins?

Rainbowbabyhope Fri 14-Jun-13 10:33:46

worse we have the same bedtime routine here - means I always get 2-3 hours in evening to myself which is great cos I can work and DH relishes this special time he gets cos he feel he misses out on she much during the day. Dh also takes charge in the mornings betweeb 4-8am as required so I can get worry fnee sleep and just passes DD to me for feeding. In reality we often spend 6-8am as family time, playing, snuggling and snoozing all together. Tis my favourite part of the day! We have pretty much always put DD down to sleep awake and she has always been fine, drifting off with her dummy so we are lucky in that respect. Recently though she has started having a pre-sleep crying session. We hold her little head and stroke and sing to her but rarely lift her out once she is put into bed (except to feed). Usually takes about 10mins to stop fussing but I think she has got the message that once in bed you stay there but you go get lovely mummy and daddy attention!

StormyBrid Fri 14-Jun-13 13:05:39

Well, we've had a better day than yesterday. I did the breakfast shift, then woke the man up at 9am and told him I was going back to bed. Kept waking up when DD was shouting, but nonetheless had a lovely three hours of snoozing. Weird dreams about loose teeth being pulled out and turning into pasta though. hmm

leni sounds like you need to find some nearby mummy friends. Are there any baby groups you could try, or similar? Conversation still likely to be all about babies but it gets you out the house, and you never know, you could end up making excellent friends.

KFF you're not wrong about us struggling to sleep through baby noises. Things got a hell of a lot better here as soon as DD went in her own room - if I'm asleep I stay that way until she makes a loud enough sound to hear from the next room. Before, just her farting or shifting around would wake me.

Massive high-five to miniWing! Keep up the good work. grin

Any when her eyes pop open, what happens? Do you start trying to soothe her to sleep? Does she start crying? If she doesn't start crying I'd suggest just giving her a kiss, telling her to go to sleep, and leaving her to it. If she is crying, try and persuade her to stop crying and then do the same. If she's awake and in bed but not sleeping, you can't make her sleep. But you can teach her that when she's in bed it's quiet time, not getting up and playing and having cuddles time. And then with a bit of luck she'll fall asleep by herself after a while.

Anypants Fri 14-Jun-13 18:02:27

Stormy - i've tried all of the above. Last night I put her down and she.opened her eyes and gave me a big smile, then started thrashing her arms and legs around. I left her to it and went to have a bath but by the time I was out, she was back into full on meltdown. I know I am to blame for rocking her to sleep mostly so she can't do it on her own.
However, am at my Mum's, been for a walk and she got grizzly but wouldn't nod off. Cuddled her through the usual screaming then popped her down. Her eyes were open but she was staring at nothing and didn't move. She dropped off after about 5 mins! Now, how the #*€& do I get her to do that every time?? hmm

Eigmum Fri 14-Jun-13 19:45:30

any soyo hope all bearable .... All ok ish here. Still really not enjoying the feeding, it seems to be a nightmare whether boob or bottle with wind and pulling away. Find myself wishing away til the time when she doesn't need milk ( like when she is 2!) which is such a shame as I really enjoyed the baby part with ds .... Reminding myself I had a nice day with dd yesterday and its not all bad but I am do exhausted.

WingDefence Fri 14-Jun-13 21:11:24

Eig are you using colief (I think I'm making that name up but I can't remember what it's called) or gripe water? You don't want to feel like you're not enjoying this time with her.

Conversely I can't believe how much I am enjoying my time with DD but hated it with DS. I remember getting to his 1st birthday and consciously thinking 'I've got through a year and only now am I starting to enjoy motherhood'. It's crazy how much it can change from child to child, isn't it? sad

Any keep going! She will get there in the end - I always think that if my DD does something once I know she can do it again, even if it takes time.

Glad you got a lie-in Stormy smile

leni please do try to get out of the house. I'd go stir crazy if I stayed in every day (although once in a while is refreshing). It's hard with your first but the sense of achievement of meeting other mums and having someone to go for a walk with is great, honestly!

leniwhite Fri 14-Jun-13 21:31:20

Why are my posts going missing?? Argh!

Ok, last try...

I do get out when OH is home and on my own, but always alone without him. I have 2 mummy mates who I'll be very sad to leave if/when we move, but they're only available when OH is awake so I'm a bit torn between them and him!

I just wanted to express empathy I guess - I've got used to feeling a bit isolated now. My life was so busy before and now going five mins down the road is a big event...

Those periods of 5 days in a row where I have sole responsibility for DS are the toughest.

rainbow you've got it sorted, what a lovely routine. My OH isn't around enough to be quite as useful, but I fully intend to maximise the dad hours next week on hols. Actually that said, I won't. I get a tad jealous when he has her for too long. I suspect this feeling will wear off with time!

You're all right of course about all babies being different, which does make me wonder how I'd find it with two. The tiddler is a dream baby. She eats well, sleeps well, laughs lots, and only fusses when there is a problem. MIL had similar luck with her first (DH), and then was blessed with his brother, who neither ate, nor slept, and didn't allow her one unbroken night until he was well over 2 shock

Leni - yup, we're going through the 'it sucks' phase of parenthood right now grin. I have days when I know I should text my friends, because I hadn't seen them in ages, but then I think.... ugh, not today.... 'cos the routine will get shot, and I'm too tired for tiddler tantrums..... It's rubbish, but I am reliably informed it gets better. On the upside there is nothing quite so lovely as the smell of the back of a baby's head. A quick sniff and the world seems like a better place.

Holiday tomorrow!!! I have not packed, or planned, or sorted a route, or even shaved my legs. A nasty case of denial methinks. DH thinks we are leaving at 10am. Snort. We rarely manage to leave by 10am to take the dogs for a walk.

Have fun whilst I'm away. Be good grin

pudtat Sat 15-Jun-13 02:24:01

I thought that too Worse. DH simply isn't around enough to take over that much, and wouldn't be safe doing his job if he was up from 4am aswell.

Mind you, he's deigned to join us tonight bit managed to just lie there shhing when I was getting DS bottle ready for his post bfing top up rather than change his nappy <eye roll>

We're off to a wedding today. Will be lovely, but wish me luck keeping LO entertained/ fed/ napped through a long and disrupted day...

Have lovely hols Worse. smile

WingDefence Sat 15-Jun-13 02:59:33

Sorry leni - I misread your post. Can I blame baby brain? blush

worse, have a lovely holiday. We're off to north Wales in a couple of weeks along with my DPs.

pud, enjoy the wedding. We went to an evening reception with both DCs two weeks ago and DD slept through the very noisy disco smile

I've just given DD a quick feed but I don't think she'd have woken except she'd kicked her sheet and blanket off. Time to find that first size sleeping bag I think!

StormyBrid Sat 15-Jun-13 09:49:23

Any I've no idea how you can persuade her to do it again, alas! But you can keep giving her the opportunity to do it, at least, and as Wing says, it will happen again eventually.

Eig I feel your pain. We're having bottle issues again. Apparently the coolest babies only drink an ounce and then start pissing about and shoving the bottle around and hitting it and then crying for five minutes before eagerly drinking another ounce and starting the whole thing again. When it's trouble every feed the relentlessness of it really gets you down. They'll get past it though. And only twelve weeks to weaning!

Good luck with the wedding, pud. And how are you getting on with those night top-ups? I've got to take DD to a funeral next month, that's going to be fun. Oh well, she's always so covered in dribble she probably won't notice if I start dripping tears and snot on her head.

chickabilla Sat 15-Jun-13 10:41:14

Ooh I'm jealous of anyone who has any semblance of a routine or is getting more than 2 hours unbroken sleep! However, this is my third non sleeping baby so I guess my body is quite used to it now!

We are BF and haven't tried a bottle yet as there are not enough hours in the day for expressing but I do all the night feeds and settling because DH would just fall asleep holding her and doesn't have the patience to keep putting her back in her basket BUT he does take over after her 4.30/5 feed so I can get an hour or so without paying attention to her every little squeak!

Busy today preparing for a little family party for DS2's third birthday. Secretly hoping DH will have mopped thefloor while I am 'busy' feeding mini chick smile

Anypants Sat 15-Jun-13 18:10:11

stormy and wing - you're so right and I just need to have the patience I have during the day at night as well! Worst night for two months last night but it turns out that she has a stinker of a cold and has beem a little bit sicky all day. Left her asleep with DH so I could do the big shop and xame back to find her still asleep. She's been quite whingey all day so I think i'll give her a dose of calpol at bedtime as she keeps waking with a high pitched scream, so must be in pain sad

Rainbowbabyhope Sat 15-Jun-13 20:45:41

worse yes we are lucky DH is around a lot as he generally works from home so his commute is 10 seconds to the office! The other thing that helps is the bedside cot which means none of us get out of bed until 8am and all we have to do is stick a hand out to sooth DD if she gets restless is the night so DH taking charge from 4am doesn't usually mean he misses out on much sleep. Our equality in division of childcare also stems partly from the fact that I started working again when DD was 6 weeks old. I work from home and do my hours around DD's needs like when she is napping or in the evenings and DH is so supportive of this. He loves his daddy/daughter time and sees it as a precious gift because we missed out on it with DD1. Amazing what blessings can come out of great sorrow - DD2 truly is a rainbow baby!

SoYo Sat 15-Jun-13 21:36:34

Evening all, back from holiday & DD did brilliantly on the long journey but a lot of sleep today might not make for a great night. I'm off to Ireland for a few days next week so went out & bought a travel cot today. She's started waking herself up banging against the sides & ends of her basket so I've set the new cot up by our bed to see if that's any better as a test tonight.

I'm feeling much better today after DH has pulled his finger out & helped a bt more the past 24hrs & I've just as the mst delicious curry. Yum! Overnight I'm now taking the stance that if I fail the transfer after a feed its then DHs turn. I'm sure this isn't popular but eve can't really argue & is doing a good job so far!

Rainbow I'm so jealous of your well behaved baby. I've been trying to put DD down awake since she was born but no matter how sleepy she is,she always finds the energy to scream blue murder & I'm a long way off leaving her to scream & see if she settles. So instead we have a baby that's rocked/sung/fed to sleep & I assume this may be the case for a long time. According to Dr Sears we have a 'high need baby' rather than just a mummy making life difficult for herself. No matter what I've tried there's just never been another open for us! Oh well, hopefully I'll get payback when she's a really easy teenager hmm.

worse hope you have a lovely break. Ours was fun & lovely with lots of quality family time although I think saying it was relaxing would be pushing it!

WingDefence Sat 15-Jun-13 22:03:01

Hi all smile

SoYo I can still remember telling the nursery staff how to shush-pat DS to sleep and he started nursery at 9 months. I never, ever remember it being a problem though and you can get to that stage too.

DD finding her thumb has really helped here though. I am still putting her down really tired (as opposed to the wide-awake-but-just-yawning stage) and after turning her head from side to side (like her brother used to do - it's amazing how I remember things from years ago like that) repeatedly with perhaps a few short cries, she stuffs her thumb in her mouth and it soothes her. My DM says she's just like me blush

We went to a big steam fair today to see some monster trucks which DS loves and DD was great. I had to feed her as usual in various odd places e.g. squished up next to strangers on a bench, watching the monster truck show. I wasn't militant enough to do it without asking the man first and luckily he was with his wife and their older baby/toddler (I hadn't noticed when he'd sat down) and she immediately said 'oh I remember doing that! Please go ahead' which was lovely. She found them a bit loud but slept through or looked about for the rest of the fair either in the baby bjorn or in the buggy.

DD has been asleep in her basket upstairs for two hours now so I'd best go and wake her for a last feed. Ooh and she's in the sleeping bag for the first time! Bit too much of it for the moses basket but I'm hoping it'll stop her waking up chilly like I think happened last night...

leniwhite Sat 15-Jun-13 22:41:58

First tube journey - done. If only I could replicate the movement at home when DS is in his cot...

Still waking at 2.30am and last night we caught a burglar!!! shock I heard a noise outside by the garages where someone already broke in last week by wrenching the garage door up with a crowbar, looked outside to see a man. Called the fuzz who arrived pretty quickly and they apprehended the f*cker grin before he'd got in!

They said he was on their wanted list so even though he hadn't actually managed to burgle this time around they could arrest him for other offences. I felt really angry that he was here actually. Next time I might go out there naked and run at them screaming... I've had enough of criminals now, especially ones who come to my house confused

KFFOREVER Sun 16-Jun-13 02:59:28

leni how terrifying. Glad you caught him before he burgled this time round. Well done on first tube journey. I have yet to face any public transport with ds. I shudder at the thought of it.

wing that sounded like a nice day out. Is it anywhere near london? Cant wait for ds to grow up so i can take him to these places. I want him to have other interests other than football.

soyo welcome back from your holiday. I think you should let dh do a bit more and let them realise just how hard it is to raise a baby know matter how good they are.

rainbow im happy you are having a great time with your dd. It sounds like a very happy home. It makesme feel a bit sad im not able to create a happy home for my ds ALL the time. The lack of unbroken sleep and currently having mil staying with us is pushing my patience. Dont get me wrong i love ds and do miss him when hes a sleep sometimes but sometimes i just am a miserable witch.

We are having a trip to Bristol for the day tomorrow. Im petrified of doing a long journey with ds. Im hoping for ds to sleep the whole journey and no poonamis pleaseeeee.

Looks like ds is has got my cold. Hes woken up with a blocked nose. At least hes old enough for karvol and calpol this time.

Fathers day tomorrow. I got a card but nothing else. When mil goes i told dh we will celebrate it better and he agreed. I will make him a carrot cake (his fave) and order him an iphone cover with a photo of him and ds together. Funds are especially tight with us at the mo as dh hasnt worked for 2 weeks and wont be for another week. Even dh is counting the days until she goes but is a lot more patient than me and wont make rude face at her behind her back.

KFFOREVER Sun 16-Jun-13 03:01:16

And any i hope mini any is getting a bit better. Its horrible when they are ill. It knocks your routine out of place.

pudtat Sun 16-Jun-13 04:22:00

Hello everyone. Lots to catch up on and on phone so apologies if I don't remember everything or name check wrongly.

Leni, wow! Scary but well done you for calling the police. A little mentioned additional benefit of breast feeding eh?

Soyo, glad Hols were good and that dh is giving you a bit more support. Hope you can get some more rest and feel a bit brighter as a result.

Hope coldy LO's are better soon .

Wedding went well, bf through ceremony which kept him quiet smile. Tried same trick through speeches later but less successful as he kept getting startled by the sound of applause or the room laughing and it made him cry. He was better when I held him up so he could see - bless. Skipped out a bit early from the party as he got rather overtired and wouldn't settle, but overall ok.

Stormy, DS has now done wedding and funeral though feeding was my cunning plan for both which doesn't really help. As for night dream feeds I've sort of given up on top ups. He takes the 10pm dream feed really well and generally isn't interested the rest of the time. However, he is gaining well again so I am less worried that we aren't hitting the daily formula target we were set, as it seems he is getting enough.

We seem lucky with DS re sleep. Although I tend to feed 2.30 and 5ish (late to bed so all moved tonight) he goes back down like a charm. Not sure I'd be coping if it was a struggle each time.

Hope all other babies are behaving over night.

Anypants Sun 16-Jun-13 06:10:26

Well thank the stars for Calpol! DD slept from 9 - 6! Feel somewhat like I may have drugged her blush but she's had a decent sleep and so have I (hallelulia) so we can face the day better! She's still snotty but hopefully will be a bit brighter today smile
Happy Father's Day y'all - hope you all take it to mean that your DH must do everything today, so that he can be the best 'father'! wink

vjhist85 Sun 16-Jun-13 06:39:53

Any- you joke, that's exactly how I'm taking Father's Day! We're on holiday in Suffolk and as DH is always away with work, i feel he still doesnt really know her. I'm seeing this as a chance for proper daddy daughter time, I've told him that he's completely in charge and doing everything apart from the 5 bfs a day!

Don't worry about the calpol thing- remember all you were doing was making LO comfortable enough so they can sleep that long despite illness. You're not sedating them!

Anypants Sun 16-Jun-13 07:15:45

Thanks vj - and you're right to expect more Daddy time today. Mother's day is about having a day off and Father's day should be the same, for Mothers! Right, off to make DH breakfast in bed.......Ha! He'll be lucky to get a cup of tea! grin

plonko Sun 16-Jun-13 12:06:11

Ooh lots to catch up on.

It does rather sound like some of us are experiencing the four month sleep regression thingamy. I've not read into this particular issue but am trying to steel myself for harder nights to come.

Eig I love the idea of a baby spa! Might have to google to see if any such thing exists round here (doubt it, we still have lidos). I think my mum and I are going to take DS swimming soon.

Leni when you nakedly apprehend the next breaker inners could you bop em on the head with a heavy pan or such like? Our freesat box misbehaves so instead of East Midlands today we get London news - I eagerly await seeing you on my evening news. Joking aside, I hope you're ok. Well done on the tube ride, I hope you celebrated with a glass of wine.

Our bedtime routine usually involves popping him down drowsy but not totally asleep (unless he falls asleep on the bottle). I'm not allowed to do bedtime as from bath time onwards its Secret Boys Time according to she. He loves this as its the only time they spend together during the week. But yeah, if we put him down fully awake we just have to keep trudging upstairs to replace dummy, pin down gently secure his flapping arms and give him his little monkey to hold. If he's dozy he falls asleep on his own within about five mins.

Stormy only ten weeks to weaning! I can't wait. May try DS with some puréed carrots etc a few weeks earlier as I'd like him to be able to munch a bit with us while we're on holiday in September. And I'm ridiculously excited by weaning.

We've had a lovely weekend with DP's family. His grandad is recovering from a pneumococcal infection and thankfully no longer contagious, but it seemed right to give him more time with his great grandson. Everyone was very impressed by DS, and quite right too!

Well I've posted my flexible working application. If it gets turned down I think I'll start something low key I can do from home. I don't really want to go back to my old job (its shit) but we need the cash. However I feel that having a kid has thrown my life into relief and I just keep thinking that life's too short to waste it working in a job I hate. Oooh philosophical rambling, I apologise! I'm just getting the message that maybe I should find something I actually want to do!

plonko Sun 16-Jun-13 19:55:55

Wow...Can I get my thread-killer cap and gown now, please? wink

leniwhite Sun 16-Jun-13 20:24:36

Plonko - I figure people are more scared of crazy women than much else! Which wine would you recommend? I keep getting invites to wine tasting - a friend goes around the world buying wines to sell in his rather posh Hampstead shop, but I've never been hmm

I'm off to see Russell Brand tomorrow! Had several dreams about him already wink

DS has been chatting non stop today. Another poonami this morning - they keep going up his front somehow even when I'm there poised to change him immediately.

Did anyone know you can buy test strips for breast milk to check you're safe to feed after drinking? Brilliant!!

OodPi Sun 16-Jun-13 20:51:38

plonko and anyone else interested in weaning check out BLW

ecofreckle Sun 16-Jun-13 21:22:37

Hello everyone. Been poorly and therefore absent. Lots to catch up with!
plonko I would delay weaning if I could so it's interesting to see you so excited about it. Hoping your enthusiasm will rub off on me! I'm essentially lazy so a move from boob to having to premeditate food is scarey! And, exciting career aspirations. Becoming a parent provides some food for thought eh?
kkf how was bristol?

ecofreckle Sun 16-Jun-13 21:24:24

Oops! Posted in error. Dh now finished his job application and is beckoning me in from garden to watch ides of march which we've been trying to find time for for ages so better dash. More later!

plonko Sun 16-Jun-13 22:31:33

Leni recommendations depend on how suggestible you are grin but after apprehending a robber and dealing with the filth I'd be tempted by a big shouty red, like a strong Malbec to match a steak. Or manzanilla sherry with a few olives. Either way, at least 14%.

Ood good link! Have scoured that website tonight. I take it Aitch is the Aitch of mumsnet fame?

Eco sorry to hear you're feeling poorly. I hear Ides is a good film though. Am exciting by getting DS to enjoy food with us. My family's very fat food-centric as grandad was a chef, so everything, and I really do mean everything, is celebrated with a feast. When I realised DS will be 9 months by Christmas my first thought was 'ooh he can eat goose by then!'

Yes the cogs are whirring. If only I'd had the foresight to choose a degree with an actual career path attached to it instead of minimal contact hours and maximum pub time. Effing useless Classics.

KFFOREVER Sun 16-Jun-13 22:50:40

eco get well soon! Bristol was good. We visited dh's family. Im very proud of myself on managing ds during a 3hr journey and a poonami on the way there. Was very impressed with baby facilities at a service station on m4. It was clean and had seperate feeding area.

Oh yes roll on weaning. I may get shouted at but i hope hes ready to wean soon so he sleeps better through the night. My friends baby sleeps from 9am til 5am. Has a feed and goes back to sleep and shes 2 weeks older.

Flexible hours- do we have to think about already. Hope your request gets accepted. If not this may give you the motivation to start a job you love.

KFFOREVER Sun 16-Jun-13 22:56:56

Question re blw. stupid question alert Do you still have to cook your food without salt? Or can baby handle salt content in food once they are 6 months?

Anypants Sun 16-Jun-13 23:41:24

KFF I have the Annabel Karmel weaning book and it says no salt for under 1 year olds as it can damage kidneys and cause dehydration.

OodPi Mon 17-Jun-13 06:52:11

There's a salt limit. It's tiny but I balanced over a few days rather than over one day as bread is one of the worst things for it. I don't cook with salt anyway. Also means if you have a meal out and baby shares you just make sure the next day is minimal salt.

Plonko Yes it's that Aitch.

plonko Mon 17-Jun-13 08:21:43

KFF my plan is to cook usual meals without seasoning, just put salt and pepper in at the table. Remember salt occurs naturally in food anyway, we really don't need much at all.

somethingbeginningwith Mon 17-Jun-13 08:46:34

So, this sleep regression...how do I make it stop? wink DS has slept through from 8 weeks so waking up at 2am was not fun. I absolutely admire those of you who wake up multiple times in the night! He had a cocktail of milk, Calpol and bonjela for his midnight feast. After being grumpy and unusually warm and snotty for the past couple of days, MIL stuck a finger in his mouth and felt an inkling of a tooth. We've all had a good rummage since and there's definitely something there!

plonko I just had a bit of a google on flexible working and hope it all goes through for you. I think that's something I want to look into as well. The problem is that if mine wasn't accepted then I would go back full time because although my degree was also useless (theatre), I do actually work in a theatre!

I too am looking forward to weaning. I can't wait to make smaller mashed up versions of our food. It might actually make me a bit more useful in the kitchen, OH would welcome that. I cooked him breakfast yesterday and refused to let him help. Cue me frantically running around the kitchen to OH's remarks of 'do you now appreciate when I do it all by myself?' angry hmm!

StormyBrid Mon 17-Jun-13 13:27:43

Stupid sleep regression. I feel like a corpse. DD woke up at 10, 1, 4.30, and 7. This is just a phase, right? She'll go back to only waking once at 4am soon, yes?

SoYo Mon 17-Jun-13 13:34:43

Stormy I'm not sure I can answer your question since I'm not sure you can regress when it was crap to start with! We're having multiple transfer fails still, taking a long time to get her down, 2 or 3 wakes a night & coming into bed at 5ish for a clue of hours of nipple chewing/boob punching/kicking & a small bit of snoozing! I think I'm getting used to it now.

KFFOREVER Mon 17-Jun-13 17:10:23

Thanks for clearing the salt query for me.

stormy and something try coping with sleep regression and a baby with a stinking cold. I too am a zombie.

KFFOREVER Mon 17-Jun-13 17:11:50

soyo sorry you are having rubbish nights. Hopefully its just a phase.

SoYo Mon 17-Jun-13 19:14:19

Right, it's 2hrs earlier than I usually put her down but she's been a crying and feeding machine all afternoon so I'm attempting an early bedtime. What are my chances of success?

On the plus side I think I may have found a cleaner that is accepting of the PuppyMonster! It's a bloody expensive luxury but as DH and I spend about 1/3 of all quality time together either cleaning/tidying or fighting about it, it's probably worth it!

How are the rest of you managing to keep your houses in a state that you can live in them? I'm finding it hard enough to eat lunch and get a glass of water in between madam and pup's demands! Today I've mostly eaten things I could easily grab so 2 pittas, 2 jam doughnuts, more biscuits than I would like to count. Not ideal!

KFFOREVER Mon 17-Jun-13 20:04:21

Agghh im losing the plot. Ds is being a little monster. He just wont go to sleep.

Cleaning? It never ends. My poor washing machine.

Rainbowbabyhope Mon 17-Jun-13 21:37:25

soyo getting a cleaner was the best decision my DH and I made years ago. We would (and did) go without a lot of other luxuries to have a cleaner because it enhaced our quality of life so much and certainly does now. Also sympathise with the food situation. I have found that the best way to be able to eat proper food is using a bouncy chair in kichen with lots of chattering and showing of food stuffs while preparing and then lots of fork drumming against plate to keep little one entertained while eating! Or alternatively making full use of the miracle that is the sling!

KF yes we have a very happy home here. Losing a child focuses your mind on what is important plus my DH is my everything and just an amazing partner in life. However that doesn't mean I don't feel and sometimes act like a bear with a sore head in the mornings after a tricky night which is most night here at the moment as DD seems to be going through a prolonged growrth spurt!

SoYo Mon 17-Jun-13 21:57:22

As predicted my chances of a successful early bedtime were bugger all. Trying again now! It's a good job this baby is so damn cute & lovely!!!

pudtat Mon 17-Jun-13 21:57:30

Good luck Soyo. Maybe she gets a bit overtired and an early bedtime will help? (Hopeful smiley).

Hmmm, cleaning. Hand held vac to grab enough bits of cat fluff to knit a new cat in a couple of mins here and there rather than deploying the dyson. Packets of polish wipes in each room to give table tops a quick wipe over cos bloody everything is covered in formula. Baskets upstairs and down to dump baby laundry in (muslins etc) so it's all together and easy to collect into a load. ignoring the state of the windows totally. Fly lady style daily blitz of one place where crap accumulates. ignoring the giant pile of laundry that used to be called our bedroom.

WingDefence Mon 17-Jun-13 22:17:57

Cleaning? Hahahahahahah kicks more crap under the coffee table

plonko, I did Classics too! Loved it but the only thing I do with it now is translate the odd bit of New Testament Greek with my lexicon in hand and much guesswork grin

I am not looking forward to this sleep regression if DD has it too next month confused We've got into a fairly good routine at the moment. She goes down at roughly 7:30-7:45 and then I wake her at 10:30ish, feed her (with various degrees of success) and she's gone through till 5:30-6 the past couple of nights. She seems to love the sleeping bag too.

We went out for my DMum's birthday tonight and she gave DD her daily bottle. 4oz of ff, down in one! DMum is going to babysit for us on Friday night so that we can go out for a drink or two. I am ridiculously excited about it. It makes the fact that DH is away from 6am tomorrow morning till 10pm on Thursday marginally better hmm

With weaning, I remember making all my own purees for the first few weeks but then found the amazing Ella's pouches and used those (especially when out and about). May do a combination of that with BLW but haven't started to think about it yet. I kept the salt content down in all our food and still do as you can add it at the table if you want extra. Boots used to sell salt-free stock cubes too as they are obviously high in salt but I'm not sure if you can get them still.

Hope you all have good or at least better nights tonight.

OodPi Mon 17-Jun-13 22:29:12

Kallo stock cubes are salt free but I saw them in Boots the other day.

We have just got the high chair out fir ds which means I can eat 2 handed again. It also tires him out v quickly so I still have to eat fast to beat the cries , it is a start,

OodPi Mon 17-Jun-13 22:29:30

Kallo stock cubes are salt free but I saw them in Boots the other day.

We have just got the high chair out fir ds which means I can eat 2 handed again. It also tires him out v quickly so I still have to eat fast to beat the cries , it is a start,

KFFOREVER Mon 17-Jun-13 22:33:57

Haha pud yes formula seems to be on various worktops around the home.opps.

Finally got ds to sleep and has been asleep for an hour. soyo hope your lo gets off to sleep soon.

wing sounds like you have a good routine so enjoy it for now.

So we are on our way to 4 months of being a mummy. What has been the best/worst advice you have been given about being a mummy?

My best advice has been to follow the babies cues in the early weeks and forget about routine. Babies will create and break there own routine.

Worst has been not to let your baby get used to being held/cuddled. (a load of rubbish ds is not fond of being held anymore sad.

ecofreckle Mon 17-Jun-13 23:15:30

soyo second time lucky? Hope so. Nct friend had your problem and hv finally visited them last week. Hv suggested she transfer baby, stay with them and allow crying to reach crescendo. Pick them up then, comfort but don't comfort feed, place back down again. Repeat. On the third night she had success. Only a sample size of one granted but though I'd share. Cleaning? Ug! Standards have dropped a little but I can't bear it untidy or filthy as it makes me feel unhinged. I have recently tried tackling a room a day which although functions doesn't provide the 'clean house flop down' satisfaction. I think a cleaner is the way to go.
It's our first wedding anniversary today so we three went to beach. Dd had a paddle with me :-) couldn't eat all the lovely food we'd planned as still crook but had a fun time. Dh goes away to Spain for work tomorrow until late next Wednesday. No wonder I feel ill!
Oh, and someone was asking bids ago (*pud?*) if babies can get hay fever. Apparently it is not until month nine that babies develop allergies to environmental factors but mine still sneezes every time we go in the garden
Finished ides of march film in three sittings as is the new way. Good. Gosling and clooney. But unsatisfactory ending me thinks.
Better get out of bath to romance dh on what remains of our anniversary

leniwhite Mon 17-Jun-13 23:24:40

Any Russell Brand fans here? I just had the weirdest thing happen... Bizarrely it involves breastmilk!! shock

SoYo Tue 18-Jun-13 01:30:38

I swear this baby's sleeping just keeps getting worse. What a monkey! I'm trying very hard to just go with it & not get too annoyed but its tough having that little voice in the back of your head that knows she can go 7hrs, even if it only happened once, and she was regularly going 5hrs from weeks 4-8 and now it's back to 2. These things are definitely sent to try us!

pudtat Tue 18-Jun-13 01:30:58

Popcorn eating smiley... Awaits further news from Leni...

Eigmum Tue 18-Jun-13 02:55:27

Yes leni cheer those of us up who still have night feeds!

ecofreckle Tue 18-Jun-13 03:27:05

Sounds potentially gross leni .....

It's hard when your baby doesn't consistently feed at roughly the same time during the night isn't it? Anyone else find it mucks up their whole day of feeds potentially because you never know what time breakfast feed is going to be? Which has knock on impact for rest of days feeds.

Sure dawn chorus is starting here.

SoYo Tue 18-Jun-13 04:51:58

Yep, the dawn chorus is in full flow here & has been since 4.

<Sits & waits patiently for Leni's tale>

vjhist85 Tue 18-Jun-13 05:26:27

Morning all! Well- I have a baby who is...something. No idea what, just something. Could be wind/teeth/oncoming illness/general grumps/wonder week/growth spurt (except prob not as refusing food). We are currently throwing everything at her and seeing what sticks including: calpol, bonjela, infacol, cuddles, seaside walks in sling, seaside walks in buggy, naptime with mummy (she's currently asleep in bed with me but as I'm in a single bed in this holiday home I'm too scared to fall asleep in case she falls out). Symptoms include: occasional unusually long naps but still waking up cross, inconsolable crying attacks, refusing boob but liking bottle (sometimes not always) being happy then suddenly screaming blue murder, fidgety/tense/straininess, constant fist chewing and thumb sucking (not unusual), general grumpiness. (From me as well, kinda ruining the holiday...)

Anyone willing to diagnose?!?

OodPi Tue 18-Jun-13 07:14:03


^My best advice has been to follow the babies cues in the early weeks and forget about routine. Babies will create and break there own routine.

Worst has been not to let your baby get used to being held/cuddled.^

Spot on!

eco there's something about the sun makes babies sneeze.

vj sorry no ideas.

plonko Tue 18-Jun-13 08:02:08

Eco it took us four goes to watch the hobbit when DS was a month old. How I wish we hadn't bothered!

To all of those struggling with sleep regression - I hope it quickly passes! It's not something we're having to deal with yet here, but go to bed in constant fear that tonight will be the night he refuses to sleep. He's done 7-7 the last couple of nights, well cosleeping from 5am as that gives us all decent sleep, but I'm still waking at 5 expecting to have to make a bottle!

Cleaning...I too become unhinged in a messy house. I see my mum every Friday and she often helps out then I cook lunch. At least one load of washing a day to attempt to keep on top of things and if DS decides to nap I try to get as much done as possible in that time. We've also been leaving the house a lot more recently so I can make mess for someone else to tidy it doesn't drive me up the wall.

Vj teething or wonder week was my first instinct. Does he have a temp? DS has been grumpy/clingy with red cheeks, über drool and been slightly warn lately - both grandmas are convinced its teeth.

Leni come back and spill the beans, you g lady!

Best advice? Premake the bottles and warm as needed. Oh and everything is a phase, so just go with it. Worst advice? Make up each bottle when baby needs it. Nhs seriously overestimating the patience of a newborn.

Wing I didn't even study a language - everything in translation blush. Was very enjoyable though, if only classicists were highly sought after!

Something the small print on my flexi working application says any changes may take 14 weeks to implement. I took leave early (Christmas) so I'm aiming to go back in October, when the money runs out.
Went out for tea and cake in the very luxurious and exotic morrisons cafe yesterday with my friend and her toddler. Grumpy four month old is nowt compared to a screaming two year old who wants to wear wellies but can't. I'm now dreading that stage.

DS has just drained 7oz in ten minutes then looked at me with disgust that there's no more. I think I'm going to have start offering more, and potentially wean slightly early.

leniwhite Tue 18-Jun-13 10:03:59

Sorry, had to grab the tiny bit of sleep DS allowed me - sleep regression here too hmm

So last night I went to a live podcast where RB was the guest - met him afterwards by chance and true to form, he announced I had 'amazing tits!', so, a bit embarrassed, I said 'Thanks, I've just had a baby' (erm, what?!). He then asked me if I was single, and when I said no, started talking about lactating mothers (he has a well publicised fetish for breast milk) and asked if he could... Well... Have some?! So I went very red and said sorry, I couldn't of course, to which he said he 'just wanted to see it come out' - all this in the lobby of a theatre with stunned people around us...

Bottom line - he asked if I'd leave with him and obviously I turned him down, he seemed pretty shocked wink as I guess he's used to getting any woman he wants! He asked me if it was 'because of morality' (this had been something discussed in the podcast) so I told him that as I'd only just got a grasp on morality myself, I had to hold on to it shock

I'd been joking for ages with my friend saying wouldn't it be funny to try and seduce him etc (we've been fans since the beginning) but I can't say I actually anticipated being picked out of a crowd of desperate women (and men!) with my post baby body and when I'm no longer frivolous and able to hang around with celebs...

Oh well, it's a story for DS when he grows up!

leniwhite Tue 18-Jun-13 10:07:56

Vj how many weeks are you at now? We're in week 12 and DS is exactly the same - refusing food is really not like him. Temp is actually a bit colder than normal bizarrely.

Anypants Tue 18-Jun-13 10:17:47

Leni - <high five> You go girl! That's hilarious that he wanted to see it come out? Wow. Cherish that moment - I would. Hope you got your picture taken with him and your two breast friends grin

vjhist85 Tue 18-Jun-13 10:36:04

Leni that's a brilliant story!
We're 15 weeks on Thursday but she was early so going by due date 12 exactly today. Having looked at wonder weeks it sounds rightish, although a lot of the stuff for
12 weeks she's doing already, rolling, grasping etc. gah, I don't know, sometimes I think I should stop analysing and just go with it, screams n'all. Then the control freak in me hits...

leniwhite Tue 18-Jun-13 11:18:08

Any - he took photos with my phone - about 5 of them!

I personally wouldn't mind sharing my BM (maybe only from a spoon or something!) but think OH might have minded shock Seems ironic that RB was all over the idea of BM whereas OH is repulsed by the thought of any leaking near him. No matter how pervy it may have seemed, kudos to RB for loving women of all shapes/sizes/states of post-natal-ness!

So poonamis - for the past week DS has started only pooing once a day, and every single one is so huge it squirts up past the top of the nappy and requires a bath in the sink because he always gets it on his hands etc.

Does a nappy exist that copes with this? Does it calm down?

StormyBrid Tue 18-Jun-13 11:56:23

SoYo thank you for the reminder that I'm lucky really - a few days of newborn style sleep is bad enough, so kudos to you for still being able to string a sentence together after three months of it. It's a bit of a shock to the system when you're not used to it though.

As for cleaning, that's also easier when you have a baby that sleeps and is happy to be put down. We got up at 7.30 today, and did breakfast and playing until 9. She went for a nap, I did the washing up and sorted out the end of the counter where we keep the tobacco (as the man is incapable of rolling a cigarette without scattering half a pouch all over the damn place and one of these days I'm going to kill him for it). After the nap, fed her, then stuck her in the bouncy chair, where she happily spent an hour and a half chewing a muslin and shouting at Jeremy Clarkson, leaving me free to whizz round with the hoover, have breakfast, and so on.

Hang on, pud, are we supposed to clean windows too? Arse. I need a cleaner!

eco we have trouble with wonky waking times throwing the feeding schedule out too. Trying to go back to a bottle every three hours during the day. The first this morning was at 6.30 rather than 7, so I was prepared to feed as early as 9.30, but she wasn't shouting so I waited until 10 and she actually drank the lot. It's when she wakes at around 5.30 that it really goes all over the place. When she does that it ends up being six bottles at two and a half hour intervals so the last one's at 7pm still. On the plus side, once we're weaning the bottle schedule isn't so important, is it?

Anyone else on bottles finding they can pour the right amount of water into the bottle just by the way it sounds?

I think I need to read up on teething, because we've got a lot of chewing and dribbling going on here. What are the signs to look out for?

No advice on the poonamis, leni. I assume you've tried putting the nappy on a bit tighter, and a bit higher up the back?

SoYo Tue 18-Jun-13 11:56:24

Leni that's bloody hilarious! What a glamorous life you lead, I can't say I've been asked for any of my breastmilk while wandering around Yorkshire recently!

What size nappies are you using? I'm using pampers baby dry size 3 and haven't had a leak since I moved up to them.

ecofreckle Tue 18-Jun-13 12:46:16

Hello leni nice story!
Quick word on nappies. At risk of sounding like a hippy again you could try little lamb bamboo with bomb proof cover. There's a great offer on these at present if you go to little lamb website and click on offers. We've been happy with Them and at nappucino the consensus is that they really are bomb proof. You have to wash them though. I think you're in flat so that might not be practical on the drying front.
Just about to embark on baby massage first class and then three hour solo drive to dads as dh reluctantly gone to Spain :-(

plonko Tue 18-Jun-13 13:45:38

Leni I second Eco's suggestion and can go one better - I currently have 10 little lamb pocket nappies that need a home. They're amazing for poonamis, I'm just too lazy to stay on top of washing them. Should last up to 20lbs.

Oh that Russell Brand, he is a one!

Stormy I'm still crap with bottles and managed to scald myself yesterday. And I've not cleaned my windows since I was desperately trying to induce labour in mid February (to no avail mind). And yep, ds's new sleep schedule has thrown all bottle times off kilter but amazingly he still demands the last one at 7. Interesting wee creatures, these babies.

Eco solo parenting is easier than you think. I mean it can be relentless and there's the distinct feeling that something's missing, but you've been a mum for long enough that you'll sail through it now. I secretly relish dp going away with work so I can just do things my way, and the smiles he gets from DS when he returns are always worth it.

And if what I've just said turns out to be a pile of crap you can come on here and rant back at me smile

KFFOREVER Tue 18-Jun-13 17:24:16

leni very impressive.

Right whos swapped my nap fighting ds with a sleepyhead. Hes been 'napping' for 3 and half hours!!! Dont worry he is alive i have been checking on him regularly.

Anypants Tue 18-Jun-13 19:13:14

KFF - i've had the same 'problem' today. 1.5 hours this morning and 2 this afternoon. Thrown me a bit as I am giving DD her last feed now, after giving the bath already. Otherwise i'd have to try another nap and get her to bed late confused
She's not happy as she's been fussing on the boob but hopefully she won't realise it's an hour earlier than normal... Dinner will be mullered. biscuit wine

Anypants Tue 18-Jun-13 20:47:21

Aaaaaaand she's just gone to sleep. Turns out her bedtime is 8.30pm, no matter what. Splendid. FFS. She'd better sleep until 8am. And she wouldn't be put down in her cot tonight, despite spending most of her day there without protest. Grrr. angry

plonko Tue 18-Jun-13 20:47:26

Well I think I win the award for most useless OH. Was just plating up dinner, making a salad, and He came into the kitchen to say 'don't use that tesco lettuce, it's really tough. I used it the other night when you didn't cook and its horrible, really bitter.' I was a bit confused so asked him to show me this lettuce. It was a bloody cabbage.

WingDefence Tue 18-Jun-13 21:04:22

Haha plonko!

leni shock shock shock Sorry though, I'm not a RB fan anyway and now I'm even less of a fan! grin

SoYo Tue 18-Jun-13 21:45:54

Plonko that is hilarious but yours is definitely not the most useless. I've just been telling mine what a shitty night we had last night with 3 hour long wakes & difficult transfers & that I nealy had to wake him up for help. He listened, we chatted about something else and then he decided to tell me he's going to sleep in the spare room tonight so his sleep isn't disturbed. Supportive hey?

pudtat Tue 18-Jun-13 21:50:28

Soyo, what time is he in the other room til and when does he take over from you? Thought he was supposed to be helping with transfers...?

plonko Tue 18-Jun-13 22:01:20

SoYo I'd be tempted to lock him in!

SoYo Tue 18-Jun-13 22:20:33

I've just gone in and had a pop at him and it turns out he fell asleep driving home tonight, hit the bumps going onto the hard shoulder and woke up but scared the shit out of himself so thought he'd better get a rest, why he couldn't have said that in the first place is beyond me! I've said that's completely reasonable but I will wake him up if I'm struggling. Fingers crossed for a good night for all and then tomorrow night he can do a bit more after he's fully rested!!!

Anypants Tue 18-Jun-13 22:50:57

LOL plonko grin

pudtat Wed 19-Jun-13 03:09:00

Hmmm SoYo. That makes more sense but make sure you get some time even if it means going to bed at 8pm. Hugs.

KFFOREVER Wed 19-Jun-13 05:44:14

Had a very good night here ds slept from 11pm until now. He briefly woke up at 3am but dh gave him his dummy and slept until now. Maybe he knows the hv is visiting today and wants me to give her a glowing report of him.

Yesterday i went to my workplace to show off ds. It made me realise i dont miss work.

soyo hope you got some rest. Its scary what happened to your dh but goes to show that us mummies are supermums.

"plonko* smile

leniwhite Wed 19-Jun-13 10:31:23

Plonko, do the little lambs not get a bit warm in this weather?

Wing - he's a bit marmite wink

We're still waking at 3am and 5.30am but not wanting to eat... He's wearing the Gummee Glove and seems to like it, bit worried he'll end up with less fine motor skills if he wears it too much, but the hand chewing was making his fingers swollen.

Sorry to hear OH's are being useless again, I woke after OH took over for his only hour of sole care of the day, heard DS wailing and came in to find OH spark out on the sofa. I know working nights messes with sleep, but I'm never getting more than 4 hours at a time and they're all over the place! He always gets at least 6 hours straight and that's even on the 5 days he doesn't work. Maybe I'm just better at coping with broken up sleep because it's some sort of evolutionary thing. Still, I don't know anyone who comes home from work and can't stay up for at least a couple of hours.

Expecting a mortgage update later - exciting but very nerve wracking confused

Rainbowbabyhope Wed 19-Jun-13 10:32:24

SoYo scary for your DH and obviously he does need rest but make sure you are also able to get enough rest to function because it would be even more scary if it happened to you with little one in the car. Its abour finding a middle ground to share the sleep deprivation burden between you both.

somethingbeginningwith Wed 19-Jun-13 10:35:31

soyo my OH has slept in the spare room for the past two nights for the same reason. Last night me and DS slept 11 hours and OH overslept after going to bed late. Should have come to bed with us and he'd have had a great night!

leni that is brilliant, I adore Russell Brand. He hooks me in with the way he speaks. I bet it was so fun!

StormyBrid Wed 19-Jun-13 11:48:50

Sleeping issues all round with OHs then. Our plan last night was he'd do the dream feed, I'd do the middle of the night feed, and he'd do breakfast - he gets the unbroken stretch and I get the lie in. Guess who had to get up and wake him up at 7.30 this morning? And then had to deal with him stamping about being a grumpy arse because a) he's tired (so am I!) and b) he's obviously got some sort of tooth infection, and has been refusing to go to the dentist for the past week and a half. Sigh.

leni I don't think it's that women are better at coping with broken sleep. I think it's that we just get on with it, rather than expecting someone else to do all the work while we have a snooze. Whether they realise they're doing it or not, I suspect a lot of these men have it in the back of their minds that we'll always be there to pick up the slack, as it were, and it never occurs to them that no one's extending us the same courtesy.

plonko I take it yours isn't into coleslaw then? Raw cabbage can be lovely. grin

leni ta for the reminder, have just ordered a gummee glove thing. Should be more interesting to chew than a muslin, and easier to get into her mouth than Bunny. (We are getting a lot of shouting at the moment, because she's annoyed about not being able to fit Bunny's entire head in her mouth).

SoYo talk to me about pampers. What's the difference between all the different sorts? We have babydry for night times and have only ever had one leak (and my God that was a shit and a half, I could've stuck the nappy on with duct tape and it still would've exploded), but they feel a bit chunky for daytime so we're on active fit ones then. And there seem to be half a dozen other types too. Most confusing!

Weighing today. Last time was two ounces shy of eleven pounds, if memory serves, and was sixteen days ago. Reckon she'll have hit 12lbs?

Also, been meaning to ask what noises everyone's babies make. Everything is "abooboo" in this house at the moment. She says it so much me and the man have accidentally had a few conversations consisting solely of "abooboo".

plonko Wed 19-Jun-13 12:53:24

SoYo I second what Rainbow said. Clearly if he's driving on the motorway he needs some proper sleep, but so do you! Do you get 'time off' at the weekends?

Leni I must confess I've not used them in this heat. I think it'd ok because they're natural fibres so breathable? All guesswork though.

Stormy agree on coleslaw. However last time I lovingly prepared coleslaw from scratch (with homemade burgers night I add!) the idiot turned his nose up. Well that'll learn him to puss me off so much that I refuse to cook. Also would I be right in thinking that your number one parenting tip is invest in duct tape?

Conversations with DS also consist of ahbooboo type noises, lots of raspberries and ohhhhh noises. He's figured out how to play Shouting With Daddy now too.

leniwhite Wed 19-Jun-13 13:05:14

On nappies again - we use pampers baby dry size 3 same as SoYo (I think?). No wee leaks yet, but these morning poo explosions just seem to have a strange way of not filling up the pouchy part where there's room, but to somehow shoot up over his bits (for those with DS's you know how hard those bits are to clean! And OH refuses to do it because he says it's weird, erm, what?!) and past the top of the nappy, no matter how tight or high it is.

plonko Wed 19-Jun-13 13:20:46

Leni it's counterintuitive but is there any possibility you're doing them up too tight? And sorry to be crass (but we are discussing poo after all), but how would your dh like it if he had shit all over his bits? Totally know what you mean about it coming forward. Was not expecting that.

Eigmum Wed 19-Jun-13 15:46:46

Hey all. Mini eig has the shits. My baby connect app tells be she has done more poos in last 24 hours than in last two months! From once every 5 days to every 3 hours! Doc says it will pass and have to say she is very happy! We are about to move to size 3 baby dry for nights and active fit for days. Love the active fit ones really suited my little boy and hardly any leaks! Given all the poo I am still waking and feeding at 11 and 3. Told my oh off for not helping last night. He said, how did little one get to you at 3 am? Did she get up from cot and walk over to the bed and latch on? I thought and said good point all I remember is feeding her and putting her down. Indeed he said as I got up changed her nappy and gave her to you but you were half asleep. I woke up during feeding ( noticed dh asleep) and the put her down ... Division on labour without even a chat, been together 11 years and married 8, clearly don't need words!

StormyBrid Wed 19-Jun-13 22:24:12

leni there will come a time, eventually, when you have to go out and leave your man in charge of your baby for a day. What exactly is he planning to do if that day involves a bowel movement? Perhaps you should ask him, so he can work out a plan. Also, for the record, girl bits can be awkward to clean too. You're not allowed to go rooting around in the depths with a wet wipe, and the stuff gets everywhere.

plonko I must confess, I don't actually have any duct tape in the house. I just dream of its myriad uses... DD likes a similar shouting game, except it's more At Daddy than With Daddy.

So, the clinic was a waste of time. Got there twenty minutes after it started, and there were a dozen babies already waiting in a room that felt like a sauna. Bollocks to that, cos I don't really fancy sweating that much and possibly fainting. Rang the HV when I got home, she said try a different clinic Friday morning and if that's too hellish to contemplate she'll come round with her scales. Is very annoying though, the local clinic that's just closed down was lovely, never more than three people waiting even if you didn't get there first thing. Which is of course why they closed it - not enough people using it.

leniwhite Wed 19-Jun-13 22:26:00

I've tried various shades of tight, sadly to no avail - today poo exploded out on to the rocker, I had to tie a muslin round him just to stop it dripping on the carpet shock

Hope mini Eig gets better soon. Weird how they smile as they're puking/pooing isn't it?

DS decided himself to go to bed an hour early, with no complaints, after two back to back dinners. Hoping this doesn't mean he wakes up at midnight... hmm

SoYo Wed 19-Jun-13 22:43:22

Evening all,

I hope mini-Eig carries on smiling through the shite!

Leni I think you need to tackle the bits-cleaning issue! There's nothing rude or embarrassing about baby bits and maybe it'll just take a bit of covertly being left at poo changes for him to realise!

My DH has come home tonight very happy with his big sleep last night and offering all the help in the world tonight guilty much?

Madame has treated us to a poo tonight finally after 13 days! I've never been so pleased to see a sludge filled nappy!

Stormy we also had a crappy clinic today. They did manage to successfully weigh her but I'd gone to ask them if they thought she had a tongue tie (GP at 6 weeks was very non-committal & I now think she has). She had a look and then explained that she's never sure about tongue ties and I'd be better asking someone else! Excellent!!!

She went down well over an hour ago and I'm celebrating by staying up and watching some TV. I think this may be an error!!

leniwhite Thu 20-Jun-13 02:36:06

Aaaaand we're up. 2am - earliest since week 3.

I've lost the ability to sleep on command, especially since my face is melting off in this heat!

It's official, we now have no routine whatsoever, apart from that DS only does poonami when I'm the only one awake confused

Is it just me, or does it seem as if there needs to be a bit more expertise in diagnosing tongue ties amongst these 'professionals' who are meant to be responsible for babies' welfare?

SoYo Thu 20-Jun-13 03:14:52

Hi Leni <doffs night cap>

I completely agree, I don't understand how they ont know about it when it can have such a significant impact & is so easy to treat.

We've finally stretched back to 3am for first feed but there's been whingey sounds occasionally since 1 so I've been waking up every 20 mins since expecting a full waking. Typical!

pudtat Thu 20-Jun-13 03:48:54

Morning ladies! Unusually rubbish bedtime here, took well over an hour and moving him from his Moses basket to his cot to get him settled, plus a bonus bottle feed. Mind you it is tres hot here... That pushed back dream feed and stupidly gave me excuse to watch the apprentice though recorded to didn't get to bed til gone 11pm so we are a little later than usual here, but not much.

Mind you, did get my 12 week wonder week email on Monday so maybe that explains things!

Honestly cannot see how anyone could not want to get their LO clean when they cannot do it for themselves and to not would leave them open to soreness and indeed infection. Don't take this the wrong way Leni, and I know we all have our foibles, but your OH seems to have more than most! Besides, I'd have thought it was easier dealing with boy bits as that's what he's used to.

Anypants Thu 20-Jun-13 08:21:31

Well - I don't know what to tell you. Madam went to sleep at 8.10 last night. I gave her calpol as she'd been really screamy and full of cold earlier. She was active in her sleep at about 6am but I had to wake her up now to feed her, as she last fed at 7.30pm. Does calpol have sedation properties? Am I going to have to give it to her every night now so she sleeps well? I'm a bit worried but, as I got roughly 8 hours sleep myself, I am secretly happy blush

leniwhite Thu 20-Jun-13 10:06:50

Any, if it does have sedative properties they don't work here... It's just paracetamol so I would guess not.

I think my OH has this paranoia that he shouldn't be touching DS's bits, it's not laziness. He's an odd chap sometimes - quite anxious a lot of the time. Often I have to make wild ultimatums before he'll actually talk about why he does certain things, which isn't ideal, but considering my past relationship experiences I'm just happier to be with someone who works hard and isn't a complete nightmare. I probably portray him in a poorer light here because it's cathartic and I know you all understand. Although sometimes I think perhaps our issues are so ridiculous that we're the only ones having them shock

vjhist85 Thu 20-Jun-13 10:13:38

No sedation in calpol as far as I know, but I guess if she's poorly, and you take away anything that might stop sleep with calpol (pain and temperature) then she's sleeping it off?

After a couple of rubbish (wonder week?) nights, dd was back to usual routine of bed at 7, dream feed at 10, waking to feed at 4.30 then going through til 7. She then had a play and another feed...and has been napping since 8... This is unheard of. So much so that I keep going to check she's still alive. Is it too much to hope that she's learning how to nap? Actually, naps have in general been longer all week. This may be because of the Suffolk sea air or the very busy days, or the fact that mummy is having at least one pint of adnams every day but i think its because of the 'poddle pod' we have bought for her to sleep on. I urge you all to google, it's brilliant!

Anypants Thu 20-Jun-13 10:37:43

The poddle pod looks very cool vj - whatever gets the LOs to sleep is a bonus!
Leni - maybe your OH is still afraid of manhandling (ahem) him and just needs more practice. I know mine does as he takes about half an hour to change DD and uses half a pack of wipes (for a wet nappy!), so I think he's being over cautious!

KFFOREVER Thu 20-Jun-13 12:49:47

Well for 2 days we have had odd naps and night sleeps. Afternoon naps have turned to over 3hrs. Night before he slept from 11-5.30. Last night was from 10-4:30. But he was wide awake and wanted to play agghh. Now considering he has slept longer recently why the heck am i so tired.

plonko Thu 20-Jun-13 17:08:05

I swear Calpol has sedative qualities. I gave DS a bit earlier because he was extra crabby (those little teeth look like they're getting nearer the surface) and he's slept a lot. Off his food a bit too, which is quite unlike him, as anyone who's seen his thighs will testify.

Poddle Pod looks awesome! So getting one of those for Plonkina no.2. What a brilliant idea.

KF That sucks. Any chance it's the dreaded 4 month sleep regression?

Right ladies, I need your help. I was absentmindedly job hunting earlier - well, more of a gander than a hunt I suppose. I went onto the website of a local university and they have a post that sounds pretty good. Great salary, I'm pretty well qualified and reasonably experienced for the role, it's only 2.5 days a week so would work really well for what I need. And I'd bring home around 4k more than if I were to go back to my current role. The only snag is that it'd start in JULY! DS would be nearly five months old. Is this too young? I know even getting an interview is unlikely as these low-level professional jobs are hugely sought after. The pay is, frankly, ridic, and seeing as we're trying to save for a wedding/house deposit it feels like a no-brainer and I should apply regardless. My real question, I guess, is this : is it socially acceptable to return to work when your baby is not yet 5 months old?

First one to biscuit wins a prize.

KFFOREVER Thu 20-Jun-13 17:17:06

plonko im not even sure when this sleep regression began as he is usually a rubbish sleeper.

I think you should apply regardless. You may get an interview you may not. If you are offered the position then you can think if you want to return to work. Only you can make that decision. It all depends on whether you really want to work now and how much you want to change your current job. Would you have to work at your old job for a certain period before you give in your notice?

StormyBrid Thu 20-Jun-13 17:51:57

Might as well apply, plonko. You're right that there'll be a lot of competition, but you don't lose anything by applying, do you? And you never know, you might be offered it, at which point you can think about whether leaving DS to go back to work is what you want to do. Bugger what's socially acceptable though - whatever works for you and your family is fine, whatever anyone else thinks.

I'm wondering if we have impending teeth here. Fartypants has been grumpy, shouty, extra dribbly, and very nap resistant for a few days. And her gums look really lumpy. She's currently sleeping in my bed next to the man, though it took her over an hour to stop spitting the dummy out and immediately demanding it back. It's a bugger when the nap schedule goes to hell like this. She's supposed to be awake and playing now, and getting in the bath in half an hour. No idea if that's going to happen...

Anypants Thu 20-Jun-13 18:12:20

There must be something in it plonko or it just had magical properties.
And you should apply for the job - all new recruits get a probation period so if you found it was too soon, you could probably get out easily.

pudtat Thu 20-Jun-13 18:21:42

Apply Plonko. Cross the decision bridge as and when you have to. But as overall it sounds like it'd suit you perfectly, what would be better for DS longer term? Happy mummy and good work life family balance or an extra month or two of you at home now and then poss even going back full time?

I will be returning ft in sept when DS will be 6 months. Admittedly I will be leaving him at home with his dad when I do, but even so. I think you have to do what's right for your family.

Good luck!

Eigmum Thu 20-Jun-13 18:22:53

plonko I am currently reading Lean In and I say do it. Completely a good idea. Less hours for more pay means more overall time with little one and more cash equsls happy parents. Also 5 months is before separation anxiety sets in so easier than leaving an 8 month old plus on the baby.

I know I may get shot down and of course there are counter arguments but my opinion given I am on number 2 is going back to a job you want to do with hours that mean you still spend 4.5 days and all nights with the baby is a great gig and you should LEAP at the chance.

Ps I am in super excited mode as mini eig had a 3 ounce bottle from me with no arguments pre bath!

plonko Thu 20-Jun-13 18:40:35

I'm gonna do it. Just spoken to DP about it and he thinks it's far too early as DS is fast becoming a Velcro baby, but I agree strongly with what you said Eig - it'll be easier now than when he's 8 months old. You've all made excellent points. Thankfully my sister and her bloke both work for major universities and can help me a lot with my application.

How was returning to work, Eig? Great news on the LO's bottle btw, how's the recovery? I think it'll be difficult at first but I'm really eager to get my own 'headspace' back iykwim. It'd be a complete joy not to have to work evenings and weekends (I shit you not, my old job had me working 100 hours straight in order to get a long weekend - I cannot will not go back to that).

Stormy get that Calpol out. It's magical. I promise.

leniwhite Thu 20-Jun-13 18:43:31

Do it Plonko - give yourself the chance at least to decide! The babies I was nanny to for a summer had been with nannies from 12 weeks old and they were still beautiful well balanced children who absolutely worshipped mummy wink

I'm kind of in a similar position. I started trying to sort out my showreel today, including recording guitar - no easy feat when DS is only happy when he can see faces. I'm feeling a bit boxed in lately, too much time doing the same routine over and over on my own... I feel horribly guilty for wanting to hand DS over to OH for longer so I can stop my music career grinding to a complete halt. I had resigned myself to putting it on hiatus anyway but every time I do (it's happened a few times!) something comes along to gee me up again. This time I have to do more vocals for the band I'm in with one of the guys from Groove Armada - working with him's such an honour so I know I have to do it. My publisher seems back on track and keen to push me to directors for film scores and video games, which if I got any would pay a year's wages from one job.

The pooey bits thing with OH - he thinks touching DS's willy will make him a child molester... What a numpty shock

plonko Thu 20-Jun-13 19:11:17

YY to feeling boxed in Leni. I live DS to pieces but I'm not made to be a SAHM. I went to a childminder from 12 weeks old and started school at 3 and I'm fine twitches

I guess I didn't get a masters degree and do a grad scheme only to chuck my professional life down the crapper cos I had a baby. I took mat leave so early I've actually already been off work for nearly six months!

Anypants Thu 20-Jun-13 20:07:35

Gah - it's been a day and a half today (so v. grateful for full night's sleep last night). Baby sensory (rock and roll week - I dislike the shrill woman who runs it but DD loves it. I would.advise it as a career as at £5 a time and 20 babies in the class, she's laughing all the way to her next session) then third jabs, all thrown into the mix with her wretched cold (which is producing dangerous amounts of snot) and she's been screaming all evening with only a half hour nap in the last 7 hours. Bathed her, administered the sedative calpol and on last feed before bed now. Pleeeeeeease let her sleep like the proverbial confused

OodPi Thu 20-Jun-13 20:29:37


OodPi Thu 20-Jun-13 20:31:53

plonko honestly babies are fine to be left that early. When I had dd1/2 mat leave was only 3-4 months anyway. I've applied for one starting in August although I've not heard anything and it closed 2 weeks ago tomorrow.

Eigmum Thu 20-Jun-13 21:01:48

Yep ood completely agree. It was tough going back to work and I would be lying if I didn't say I had days when I wish I was at home but it's not easy either way. There was an interesting study that said 10 per cent of women long to be SAHM, 10 per cent long to go back to work ... These two groups get it easy. The other whooping 80 per cent of us struggle, if we give it all up to be there every second we wish we had a job and if we have a job we sometimes wish we were home! I fall in that category but the cash from my job gives me and my children everything they need and me some social and professional furfillment. DS has had a nanny since 9 months old. He adores her but he loves me and I make a huge effort to be there for every big thing and I make all the decisions etc.. He is even proud of my working and office. I can't say if it will always work but you can always change your mind and quitting a job is much easier than finding one if you step off the employment track completely for some time. I found saying I'll go back for 6 months and if I hate it quit easier then thinking of it as an all or nothing decision ...

ecofreckle Fri 21-Jun-13 05:04:26

plonko sounds like we're unanimous in our encouragement. I'd say it sounds like a great opportunity. I sound a bit soft when I say it but I always think that in situations like this go for it and if it's meant to be then it'll happen. If not this one then something else exciting around the corner. Get that advice from family in the know and go impress!
Turns out single parenthood (dh on day 3 of 9 working in Spain) doesn't suit me and that I'm a total wimp! I have been keeping up with your news but found no time to comment. Those of you with oh who work away respect to youg it's the mental burden that's hardest for me. Knowing you can't share trouble shooting. Dd had awful day on weds. Worst since week five ish. Sods law! But was a delight yesterday. I think like with some of you the hot weather was a factor. And poss being away from home. We're at grandpa/sister's house. Sister and I are trying to sort though mum's stuff so don't suppose that's adding to the fun factor. Yesterday's highlight was finding a mug I'd made for mum at one of those pottery places. I'd written on it 'a hug from my mum makes everything better' which set me off...and made me think about my own precious relationship with dd. Funny old times. On the plus side there are eleven pairs of house Martins nesting in the eaves of the house and with some much glass in the house you constantly see them coming and going. Lovely. And being here for 'normal' days with nieces is nice. Having breakfast with them. Helping with homework. Hearing about their days. :-)
Going to try sleep to the frankly now tedious soft sound of ewan the dream sheep. It's Friday ladies! Whoop! What have you all in store for the weekend?

LaLaLeni Fri 21-Jun-13 05:56:23

I've name changed, just on a whim really. Not even different, just a variation.

Ewan is tedious Eco, I might change him too! It's either him or the dehumidifier, which works but also triggers the monitor constantly so if I'm watching TV all I can hear is that. It's like tinnitus.

DS held out until 3am but I couldn't locate my own off button after his feed so I now feel all odd. He's snorting and farting loudly whilst thrashing around which frankly isn't helping me sleep!

StormyBrid Fri 21-Jun-13 11:07:44

3am sounds blissful, Leni. Last night we had 8.30, 10.30, 2, 5.45, and 7.20 wake ups. I did the night shift and theoretically had a lie in, but she's been very shouty this morning and I feel like a corpse again. Very impressed with the man though. 7.20 she woke up, I checked my phone to see what time it was, and by the time I'd put it down I could hear his footsteps on the stairs - he'd woken up all by himself! And when I eventually got up (half an hour ago) he was pacing round the living room with her rather than just sitting there letting her shout.

You've reminded me, I never got round to trying white noise. May stick the fan in there at some point soon. These 45 minute naps are still ridiculous.

Rainbowbabyhope Fri 21-Jun-13 17:42:17

plonko I have been working since DD was 6 weeks old and it has kept me sane and feeling like myself. Granted I work from home and only 3 hours a day but still makes me a much better mum for having that side of me kept going.

leni you might want to point out to you OH that him not changing your DS would actually be child abuse if you didn't do it.

LaLaLeni Fri 21-Jun-13 17:52:13

He does do it, just if I'm here when a poonami happens he asks me to. He would never leave DS unchanged shock

I think we've just bought a flat!! grin

Eigmum Fri 21-Jun-13 18:18:19

Yeah lala how exciting?

worse, wingd - all ok with you and the litte ones... Hope everyone doing well ad looking forward to the weekend!

Eigmum Fri 21-Jun-13 18:18:48

Which flat la la leni!

pudtat Fri 21-Jun-13 18:47:54

Oooh! Yes, which one? Congrats Leni!

Funny day today, just two super long naps and fewer but longer feeds... I'm totally confused as to whether he's had enough or not <addled smiley>

LaLaLeni Fri 21-Jun-13 19:38:03

Greenwich new build - we exchange in four weeks! Ok, who knows how to move house with a baby?!

Pud, we're the opposite - double the feeds and ONLY ONE NAP for less than 30 mins... Oh dear.

pudtat Fri 21-Jun-13 20:20:42

Safe to say we're not repeating the perfect bedtime of yesterday...

Eigmum Fri 21-Jun-13 20:56:58

We did it with number 1. The steps, first find someone to look after baby while you do packing etc. 2. Label baby stuff separately and get it all unpacked first before you go pick up baby!

SoYo Fri 21-Jun-13 20:59:32

I really need this bubba to go to bed but she's so resistant! I'm at my parents & we're leaving for the ferry to Ireland at 5am so I'd really like to get some sleep before then! It'll be about 10hrs of travelling in all, I'm dreading it!

Congrats on the house Leni

Rainbowbabyhope Fri 21-Jun-13 21:20:49

leni we are moving house in a few weeks time and the answer is to pay for a packing service as this means minimal disruption. And sorry, wasn't suggesting your OH would leave the little one unchanged just a suggested response to the weird assertion that there is something untoward about cleaning your own child!

somethingbeginningwith Fri 21-Jun-13 21:50:38

Congrats leni that's so exciting. We're moving in August hopefully, we're just waiting for a move-in date so if you have any tips after you've moved re:baby then do share smile we're going to start packing bits up soon. Can't wait.

Was playing with DS earlier and he opened his mouth wide to smile and two little teeth were poking through. I was so shocked!! shock

KFFOREVER Fri 21-Jun-13 22:11:49

Congrats leni. Hope you and your little family be very happy in your new home.

something wow new teeth already. How cute!

Im exhausted after ds woke at 4,30am to play. This is 2nd night in a row. Hope tonight is much better. Finally got my coil in and feeling a little crampy. Very relieved it was a painless task.

Evening all. Missed me much grin? Ahhhh go-wan.... say you have.... just so as I feel popular like grin

Been having a quick flick through all the updates, and sounds like everyone has been busy... but may I just say Leni I'm thinking you take the prize here. From what I gather you have in the space of less than a month had your mate chuck eggs on national TV and get her mugshot on the yahoo home page... apprehended a burglar... been propositioned by Russell Brand, and had him request to share in your DS's lunch.... name changed and bought a flat confused. The rest of us in comparison have been more or less sitting on our ar5es contemplating our navels babies!

In my defence though I have just managed a trip to Devon and back, and negotiated two days under the same roof as my hyper active parents, which is a feat in itself. Getting away for a break was the best - for those yet to try it, I can definitely recommend. Babies are natural travellers as
1. they sleep in cars.... much better than they sleep anywhere else.... and there is nothing quite so cute as travelling in the back seat holding hands with a sleeping baby
2. they make friends everywhere they go. The worselet only needed to cast a sneaky smile in the direction of a few old ladies and she was surrounded by devoted hangers on.
3. they don't care if the holiday cottage has fleas. Mummy cared.... daddy cared.... I'd like to think the cottage owners would have cared... but babies... Nah. So long as their bed is kept off the floor (which believe me it was) they have no clue
4. They regard every outing as an educational experience, soaking up sights and sounds like little sponges, before falling sound asleep.... for hours.

So there you have it, if you want a rest, go away.

Other than that, well much as everyone else on here... good days, and bad, with lots of smiles, gurgles, shouting at daddy (mini-worse that is, not me.... although I may have been tempted grin), and the milestone that is the 16 week growth spurt. I am soooo glad the tiddler is drinking the evil powdered stuff these days, as I'm not sure my boobs would cope. To say she is hungry would be like calling a giraffe a tad taller than average.

Well, I'm off to collapse in a corner bed now. Nightie night, wishing you all good sleeps, and no feeds.

Rainbowbabyhope Fri 21-Jun-13 23:10:27

worse what is the secret to getting babies to like cars? DD pretty much only cries when she is in the car these days - in fact she rages through every journey! She very rarely sleeps in the car except if exhausted from the screaming! Only take her out once a week now as don't want to subject her to it unnecessaily!

Anypants Fri 21-Jun-13 23:49:11

Same here rainbow - DD has started to dislike car journeys and just shouts at me all the way, until she passes out just prior to reaching our destination and I inevitably wake her up getting her out the car.
We have yet to organise some sort of holiday type affair but I do need one - am happy to go anywhere just so long as DH can take DD for long walks so Mummy can reeeeelaaaaaaax grin wine wine wine wine wine

ecofreckle Sat 22-Jun-13 04:23:42

We missed you worse!
Sounds lovely. Except for fleas.
No pearls about car journey heaven I'm afraid. We have a lamaze toy and a high contrast book to look at and something to bash. It's rare (sadly) a day passes when we don't have a trip to do.
We had worst night since week two I'd reckon (not terrible but it's all relative to what's normal), she's really finding something hard. Think the rain on the windows is responsible for this most recent waking.
Have friends of mum's coming over for lunch tomorrow and their daughter who's got an eleven month old. Dad's going to be a handful because he's got a bee in his bonnet about their not having been to see us since mum's funeral. Might have to spend the day smoothing the way. Whilst bouncing a fractious baby and feeling like I'd rather be in bed.
Lovely mid summer weather we're having.
Hope your nights and meteorological data are better than ours!

LaLaLeni Sat 22-Jun-13 04:26:19

Haha Worse, it has indeed been eventful... There was also the Stephen Fry incident to add to the list! All I do is sit on my arse actually, yet somehow these things still manage to happen...

I found the tube much akin to a car fir DS - except no traffic jams so it stops for less time. Hoping we don't develop vehicle aversion, sounds bloody awful.

Luckily we don't own furniture which is great for moving, but also expensive after all the buying costs. Can't believe stamp duty is £8K??! confused I've never chosen a sofa before, any tips? We have a nice month of access to both flats so we'll probably move the core of stuff with friends ourselves and maybe get my Dad to come up and babysit, then I'll have to pay another £500 just to get the piano moved. Mind you I don't envy anyone that job.

DS's bcg scab burst this morning - bled everywhere but now looks much better.

KFFOREVER Sat 22-Jun-13 07:12:18

Well what a shocker. We had a 9-7 sleep. Lovely. Doesnt mean i was asleep during those times though and i promise i didnt sedate my child with calpol smile.

Ds hates the car seat too but now i give him a cuddly toy to distract him as hes getting more skillful with his hands.

leni furniture buying is exciting moving is not. Re: sofa. I think a child friendly sofa maybe handy ie washable covers and if u have overnight visitors one that turns into a bed?

Rainbow and Any Is this right? Do other babies really not like cars confused? I had no idea. Mini-worse has no idea. Don't tell her.... We did stop at various national trust houses on the journey though, so that we could feed, change, and tire her out looking at stuff. That probably helped.

Ah yes Leni, I'd forgotten you'd been hanging with Mr Fry as well! You have certainly been one busy lady.

As for sofas, maybe go for something washable, wipeable or second hand for now, as the baby/toddler years are not kind to soft furnishings, and definitely sit on it before you buy. It took us 10 years (don't laugh) to find a sofa we both find comfortable. A potted summary of my extensive research to date is:
- too deep a seat will have you sitting like an over grown 3 year old with your feet off the ground. This is not an easy position to get up from.
- too low a back will give you chronic back and shoulder ache after 10 minutes
- really soft seats are fine until you try and stand up. Then you will flail about like a seal in quick sand, which is never a good look.
- sofas need arms. Trendy ones without just don't work. Fact.
- measure your doorway and any stairwells/corners to get round. It doesn't matter how comfortable it is, if you can't get it in the flat you can't have it.

Eco you have my sympathy. Families are hard work. My dad is equally difficult as after 73 years of always being right, he is still very much of the view that he still is. This can get tedious grin

Any - a holiday definitely helps break the routine of new mum-dom... did me the world of good. It is nice to get out and about, and do stuff, with an extra pair of hands to help out. I'm increasingly of the the opinion now is probably one of the easiest times to go away as our babies small enough to be portable, and not mobile enough to be a pain. Aside from having to organise every outing round feed times mini-worse was no trouble at all. In fact if you use a sling you can go pretty much anywhere.

Anypants Sat 22-Jun-13 09:08:52

That's what i'm thinking worse - maybe somewhere like Center Parcs where we can go self catering. Lots of activities for DD and DH and the spa for me! grin
I think DD would be alright on a long journey but it's probably because we're only ever driving for 15-20 minutes that she gets the hump. We'll see, I guess.

LaLaLeni Sat 22-Jun-13 09:11:03

That reminds me, we need a sofa bed for the spare room too... I think dark colours will be the way to go - totally agree about backs/arms. Maybe we'll put a big hardy throw on it until the wee man is bigger.

Came in to the living room to find DS watching 'Baby Jake', laughing and stamping excitedly - we never face him towards the TV because he never looked at it so it was kind of amazing to see him having such fun on his own watching a weird half animated baby whizzing around in space! Tweenies was a bit too much though.

Maybe the 9-7 sleep with only one feed did the trick wink

StormyBrid Sat 22-Jun-13 10:25:31

DD likes cars. Possibly because she only ever goes in my dad's and my brother's, and she likes Dad's Ozric Tentacles music, and brother's eclectic selection of hip-hip, ska and reggae. Probably because she knows her dad would be horrified to know she was listening to it. grin

Last night went like this:
7pm bed
8pm woke up squeaking, put herself back to sleep
10.20 woke up demanding milk
11 I went to bed
12.30 I got to sleep
1.15 I woke up
1.45 she woke up for milk
3am I woke up
4.15 she woke up, too early for milk, so got a dummy
4.40 she woke up again, put herself back to sleep
5.30 she woke up for milk
6.30 I got back to sleep
7.30 she woke up for the day and woke me too
8.30 she went for a nap and I got back to sleep
9.45 the man woke me up as his mother will be here soon
10.30 she is still asleep

Sleep regression: totally not a myth. I am a zombie. And I can't even get an early night tonight because I have to give Number Three's cats their supper and breakfast.

plonko Sat 22-Jun-13 10:44:08

Leni awesome, glad you've found somewhere. I reckon moving with a baby this age must be far less complicated than if you had a tantrumming two year old. You are a busy lady!

Worse glad to have you back. Sounds like you had a lovely break. I also have a car-happy baby. I think it's partly because I live in the sticks and have to drive everywhere (as its cheaper than public transport) and partly just personality. I offer a dummy, rattle and monkey every time, and he's usually asleep within minutes.

Something two teeth?! Wow! I haven't checked his gums this morning but my mum thinks it'll be any day now, his gums are so bump. We may have administered a few doses of sedative Calpol in the last two days.

I felt sick as a monkey yesterday so my mum came over to babysit while I lounged about and moaned. I came downstairs from a nap to find a clean kitchen, hoovered lounge and piles of freshly ironed clothes. Apparently DS naps for her. I might ask if she'd like to move in.

Eigmum Sat 22-Jun-13 10:54:41

Hey worse! Lovely to here from you and i did miss you and your messages that make me laugh! Agree holidays are the best. any we are thinking of giving centre parcs a go too.

We are on day 6 of the shits. I don't like to moan and feel one coming on so Please feel free to ignore while I rant. I know babies have nigges but we just seem to be constantly ill!! I also know some people really suffer with huge issues and we are having lots of little trials but Baby connect tells me we are on an average of 8 poos a day for the vast 6 days having been on an average of one poo every three days! Doc doing a poo sample on Monday. Not much i can do other than keep feeding her! My decision on bf is now made. It's made no bloody difference to dd on illness contracted or duration (cold at 2 weeks giving way to thrush at 4 weeks just finishing and we have bronciliotiuos at 11 weeks and when that goes viral gastroenteritis at 13 weeks and still going) so as soon as we can get rid of this poo saga we are bottles all the way. I have given it more than a fair go ( i did it exclusively for 12 weeks of her life and with a bottle occasionally for day when she would take it) and with all this sickness feeding every2 to 3 hours is killing me and oh or others can't share the pain when she won't have one consistently. If we lived 500 years ago the whole village would nurse her. We don't, so onto the bottle she goes ( and no I'm not pumping in the 20 mins she isn't feeding). Fed up does not go far enough. Ok rant over... Trying to have some perspective but refuse to be miserable anymore.

Breast may be best for some but it sent working here.

Eigmum Sat 22-Jun-13 11:16:48

I am sorry for the rant. I know the rest of you are over all that and happy with your choices. Time for me to move on. While I type mini eig is doing 6th poo of the day, joy.

StormyBrid Sat 22-Jun-13 11:33:41

Happy thoughts, Eig - you'll be able to put your feet up with a well deserved glass of wine very soon! And do feel free to moan, it's what we're here for. smile

plonko Sat 22-Jun-13 13:29:52

Eig well done. You've put up with a lot of shit (literally) and it's time to move on. I think it's a good decision, I don't know how you've kept bf up for so long <hands Eig a seriously big medal, and a massive glass of wine>

Stormy what are you doing posting on here? GET TO BED!

Hey Eig, don't sweat it. I've just done the full transition, and you know what... the tiddler is as happy as larry and to be honest far more comfortable gut wise. Her nappies may be full on disgusting these days, but at least they arrive with some regularity rather than every 7-10 days. Much better for everyone that way.

Oh exciting.... we're going out now. To a second hand furniture place. Let it never be said I don't have an exciting life wink

Eigmum Sat 22-Jun-13 15:10:12

Thanks ladies! Much appreciated. stormy, i have a bottle of champayne in rhe fridge and i am going to drink it all once fully transitioned!! Time to stop stressing and start enjoying little one!

LaLaLeni Sat 22-Jun-13 16:07:04

Eig you've done brilliantly. You've made a decision so now you can get on with living! I still can't make one either way so doing both, bit pointless really. Respect to anyone who can manage 12 weeks ebf shock

Anypants Sat 22-Jun-13 17:58:51

Hate to butt in but i'm on week 17 of ebf <smug smile>. I found it hard going during the growth spurts and when she refused to take a bottle of ebm but we're back on track now and i'll hopefully keep going until DD's well onto solids smile

Anypants Sat 22-Jun-13 18:01:01

But repect to anyone who gives it a good go - if it doesn't work for you, you have to change confused

StormyBrid Sat 22-Jun-13 18:58:20

plonko I would love to go to bed, but I can't - got to feed those cats at 11pm! Which should be entertaining as one of them's on medicated food so they have to be fed in different rooms, the door to one of which jams and traps people in the kitchen for all eternity, and they're both going to be lurking by the front door waiting to make a break for it when I go in. Poor little buggers, one of them has cat AIDS so they're not allowed out.

Well, the mother in law has been and gone for another month. The foundations of DD's mountain of plastic tat have been laid. We may have to invest in a toy box.

worse the nappies are something else, aren't they? I swear there was sweetcorn in one here the other day. And it's been two days since the last one so we're expecting some sort of super-eruption tonight. Fun times.

plonko Sat 22-Jun-13 21:32:42

That's an hour and a half til feeding time, I think that's feet up time Stormy. Poor cats though, dps aunties cat had AIDS and needed a lot of care. Give em a snuggle from me.

Oh yes formula nappies. They were a surprise, and will only become worse with weaning. On the other hand a bit more predictable.

We've had a rather interesting day on the bottle front today. Tiddler has recently decided that he doesn't like big bottles anymore and is giving up halfway through in order to sleep. Sometimes he carries on in his sleep so one feed can take a whole friggin hour, and sometimes he just chokes. On days like this I'd rather dp was at work, he just gets so stressed by it and gets in my way. He's also prevented DS napping alllllll day due to over-parenting.

A girl I went to school with took her 8 week old for his first round of jabs last week. She told the dr her baby seemed a bit under the weather but jabs were administered anyway. They've spent the past 5 days in hospital with what appears to be a dose of baby pneumonia sad so sad for them. These events certainly bring everything sharply into focus.

StormyBrid Sun 23-Jun-13 08:01:48

Spent four hours playing Warcraft then fed 'em and went to bed, plonko. Wasn't a bad evening. Still had trouble getting to sleep, but at least Fartypants had a better night. Two semi-wakes and put herself back to sleep before I went to bed. Woke around 2.30 for milk, which I slept right through, amazingly - the man must've been on the ball and got up there at the first squeak. Which meant when she woke at 4.15 I had no idea she wasn't due a feed, and so was a bit surprised when she only drank two ounces. The amount she was thrashing about, I think her bowels had woken her. Up for the day at 6.30 with an exploding bottom. She is now watching cartoons while I pray she'll manage a decent nap in a bit.

Anyone else a bit alarmed by the horrifically sexist adverts on kids' TV?

plonko Sun 23-Jun-13 11:17:54

Ugh I'm very annoyed. Yet another weekend where we stay in the house and do sod all because dp owns a ps3 and its raining. Why would I want to go out, to converse with actual adults? Why isn't my baby enough?


Also I just read this article about breast feeding interesting as it is, the comments make me want to put my fist through a wall. Ladies, would i be right in suggesting that comments such as this are why many of us turned to formula in the first place?

StormyBrid Sun 23-Jun-13 12:12:31

I'm quite amused by the suggestion they're not promoting breastfeeding enough - did anyone here manage to miss the message that formula is powdered poison and babies will spontaneously combust if they're not plugged into a boob at all times? And I don't know why they're saying young mothers will be seeing ads for formula - they're not allowed to advertise first milk (and do older mothers not have televisions, or what?). Also, I'm voting we don't let miniEig see that article, because I don't know what necrotising enterocolitis is, but it doesn't sound fun and we don't want to give her ideas.

plonko Sun 23-Jun-13 12:27:27

Some pretty ignorant comments eh Stormy? Maybe they should focus on people who've actually had babies a d tried to breastfeed! I love the idea that breast feeding is natural therefore easy and instinctive. Just like childbirth then wink

clearly I had bleeding nipples because I saw one too many glamorous cow and gate ads.

OodPi Sun 23-Jun-13 16:44:27

One of the biggest problems and would be quite easy to fix is that MWs/HV have virtually no bf training and if they do its not always up to date. I've had so much crap advice and corrected loads.
One of the MWs post birth this time brought a student to meet me as I was tandem feeding and the MW hadn't seen that for years. Student then asked loads of basic questions like 'how much milk are they taking?' ...

pudtat Sun 23-Jun-13 19:15:22

Hmmm. Very frustrating for those of us who have really struggled. All the professionals I see say they can't believe I've stuck with it at all given the issues we've had, even though we've had to combination feed from the get go. Yes, that's right. Adding poison to the mix (rolls eyes).

On a totally different note, anyone other than SoYo been following this thread gift list for mother of the baby ? You do need to read the whole thing (though highlighting op's posts might be helpful if you don't have a spare few hours) as it really has kept me entertained for the past few days... And I do like a happy ending.

OodPi Sun 23-Jun-13 20:04:58

Yes I saw that one. The parking one was pretty good too

Eigmum Sun 23-Jun-13 20:54:12

stormy I am not let mini eig read it!! We are still poo central here and I have a lovely litte mini poo scoop to take the sample to the docs tomorrow. But what a load of tosh. It's like we are idiots.

We are aware it's better ( although if people could remind mini eig I would be most obliged). Only plus is my diet is exceptional now so I am healthy and the hand washing hygiene of my husband and three year old s now at epic proportions we all have flaky skin!

It is true that there are in my mind two big issues (1) getting started. Here the help is woeful. through my own trial and error I failed, through the paid help of a maternity nurse for the day I got it working, but not everyone has a spare 200 pounds to throw at getting decent help. (2) sticking the course with public feeding etc. it's difficult. I managed quite well today in ikea croydon but if mini eig gets wind it's all thrashing about and difficult and there aren't many easy places to feed comfortably so you end up either not feeding well at that feed, then having a snacking and puking baby all day or being tied to the sofa. How you manage that ood with two or more kids is impressive. as that is fine if you have one baby but much more difficult when you have two. ( perhaps I will do my own study on how bf 'ing number 2 leads to obesity and tv addiction in number 1 toddler who is bribed to watch tv all day with chocolate biscuits) I really think the formula ad thing is a red herring. We get that it's a second choice ( or at least the scientific evidence there is to date suggests it is) we struggle because of 1 and 2. Also I think because we put so much pressure on it might actually have the wrong effect. Desperately trying to bf being worried about nipple confusion and formula supplementation adding to the pressure and then eventually thinking ( as I did first time around) I have failed by giving them the bottle I am knackered and my nipples are in shreds? Give up.

If only mini eig weren't such a big fan ... She certainly didn't get her enthusiasm for it from me.

I await the lurkers to tell me off but feel so much better for getting that little rant off my weary chest. I want my a cup boobs back. These c cup ones are annoying!!

I'm with Stormy - the hospital I was at did nothing but promote breast feeding. I was quite happy to play ball, but if I hadn't been I can't imagine the recovery period would have been very pleasant. To say they put mothers under pressure would be a massive understatement.

Eig - if anyone tells you off send them my way. You've been to the ends of the earth and back, and put way more effort into bf-ing than anyone else I can think off. I don't care if someone else has ebf their tiny tot for 3 years whilst wearing a hessian moby wrap and lentil hat. I really don't. We all do our best, and you've done gold star good.

Absolutely exhausting day today, for no reason other than having a house full is stressful! The tiddler has been lovely.... no unnecessary screaminess, nice civilised dinners, and a most unfussy final settle. In fact her last feed was a dream feed.... or so DH tells me. I was chatting to my parents and came in to find her fed, changed and fast asleep for the night. Can someone please tell me where my husband is, and as I frankly don't recognise this version. What is even weirder is her also cooked the dinner and baked some bread confused

Eigmum Sun 23-Jun-13 23:19:44

worse how lovely! Glad mini worse is doing so well! My baby app tells me 5 poos today .... So that is one less than yesterday, please let the week of shit be ending! The husbands must have got the memo to up their game. Mine has got Wimbledon tickets for us and a nanny for tiddlers! What if she is still sick I say and won't have a bottle, nanny will bring her over for me to feed her (we live nearby!) so can't complain .... A couple of poo free hours is just what I need!

pudtat Mon 24-Jun-13 03:38:37

Fx that the poo fairy has finally moved on Eig. Agree with Worse (nice to have you back btw!) that you've been fab. Knowing how hard I've found the need to constantly push a 3 hr schedule and how hard it is to get to even 4 hrs overnight, I have no idea how you've coped with 1.5-2hr feeding for the stretches you have or any stretches at all after the first week and that's without a 3yo. Gold stars all round.

Eigmum Mon 24-Jun-13 04:27:17

Thanks pundat , well poonami had us up so poo sample collected. Then a big vomit so I've woken the man to help as I've been up over an hour what with everything. Grrrr

Eigmum Mon 24-Jun-13 04:28:21

pundat do you think we are the only two left with these awful wee am night feeds?

pudtat Mon 24-Jun-13 05:53:31

Dunno. Depressing if we are although at least poor minieig has an excuse what with being poorly. MiniPud just seems to need to eat around 4 hrs after his dream feed and then 2.5-3 hrs after that. Not habitual waking as times change depending on when dream feed was etc. Given the ongoing issues with his weight I just cannot try to wean him off any time he will eat well.

Still struggling slightly as he's dead fussy about his bottles, and mostly insists on boob. All very well but I do worry that it simply isn't enough for him confused. Means I bin formula for a pastime which seems so wasteful, but I just never know when he will suddenly polish off a 3oz bottle? Only has about 6-7oz in the whole day, which given I do 3.5 in his dream feed gives you some idea of how random it is. hmm

However, otherwise he's lovely. Head control really coming on. He tries to do too much, so remained wobbly as he wouldn't stop looking round, up down etc before he could hold it steady meaning it just kept going out of control. His pull to sit is impressive as he's using his arms and tummy to pull himself up a bit now too, and he finally likes toys and reading books together. It's getting rather fun!

Hi Ood? How's LO getting on? And you? Hope all good and calming down. which parking thread?

Morning all. Hope you get a lie in later Eig and Pud to make up for the broken night. Hopefully your two tiddlers will take up a more mum friendly schedule soon, and are busy planning really calm collected teenage years as compensation for you.

Last day of my parent's visit and my DH's holiday today, so back to the same old same old tomorrow. I'm going to miss the organised chaos that is my family when they go. Despite being in their 70s they are completely hyper and feel the need to rush about madly doing stuff every second of the day to avert the dreaded boredom. I'm kind of hoping I have half their energy at the same age and am already plotting many ways of driving the worselet up the wall for amusement like grin

Did another national trust place yesterday.... it's becoming quite a habit. Batemans this time, which is lovely in a spooky gothic kind of way. For the car nuts amongst you (long shot.... I'm guessing there probably aren't many) Kipling's old Roller is on show, the the AC club had a meet in the car park which had DH dribbling all over the floor. Why do men love cars? I don't get it. OK so I can appreciate the finer points of a rather beautiful sleek classic, but some of the 1970s efforts with their ugly great radiator grills and square corners..... why????? confused

OodPi Mon 24-Jun-13 07:55:34

eig I think it's a fairly normal feeling re bf.

Plus some babies are easier than others.
Dd1 was easy , dd3 had tongue tie so was v slow but not messy or flaily, ds is the hardest to feed out as he flails and has reflux and poos mid feed noisily so everyone looks at us I think I have the advantage of knowing it gets less intense so can power on.

StormyBrid Mon 24-Jun-13 09:11:59

Don't worry, Eig, you're not the only one still doing the silly o'clock feeds. I really miss the days (all three of them) when DD slept through. These days we have two options for nights: she wakes around 10, 1, and 4; or she wakes around 11, 2, and 5. Used to do 11 and 3 or 4 - I miss those days too! I just don't tend to be online during those feeds. It's roll out of bed and down to the kitchen, milk in microwave while I pee, upstairs and feed in her cot, up for a burp while she stares at the curtains, and back down she goes, at which point I go back to bed. And I refuse to get up at 6am these days. She gets fed in bed and told to go back to sleep.

The hospital I was at didn't actually promote breastfeeding particularly. Possibly because we're a very deprived city, and there's a link between socioeconomic status and tendency to breastfeed; there's likely a higher than average number of mothers here who bottle feed right from the off. I was asked if I was breastfeeding and said I'd give it a go, and some woman started mauling my boob and shoved it in DD's mouth, and that was it really. Ood's right about the lack of properly trained people to help though - had I had someone around all night helping me to get her latched on properly rather than being left to my own devices, we might have managed rather better.

pud sounds like yours is on a similar night pattern to mine. We get between three and five hours before the first feed and then the gaps get progressively smaller by an hour each time. Frustrating, isn't it?

Going to be a knackering day here today - the man's finally back at work so I'm going to be all on my own. Fingers crossed me and DD don't get bored of each other too quickly.

plonko Mon 24-Jun-13 09:16:20

Gah! I wrote a such a lovely long post and it got swallowed.

Ood what's the longest you've breastfed any of your kids?

Experience seems to be key. I'd have leapt at the opportunity to meet a bf coordinator. We stayed in hospital for 3 days of obs after ds's birth. We had lots of problems with feeding and I constantly asked for help but clearly the staff on the ward were not qualified or experienced enough to help. One suggested tongue tie then disappeared, and soon after we found those red dehydratey crystals in ds's nappy. So a hca poured some formula into him ;) ridiculous. Later that night when DS was cluster feeding I panicked, not knowing what was going on. A midwife told me he was just using me for comfort, but I now know he was trying to stimulate my supply and it was normal. Her recourse? Formula. It's like they expect a certain amount of failure so acquiesce early on instead of giving you support. I can't blame, they're under qualified and over stretched.

Worse I'd love to be an energetic croney, showing up at ds's family home and getting in his grill. Yes! That's a retirement plan.

Pud excellent thread. Had a good soak in the tub with a glass of red while I read it, lovely!

Today I have to attempt to take a photo suitable for ds's passport. Ha! That'll be good when he's five and an immigration officer has to look at a photo of a fat four month old. Hopefully I can get him to stay still, without sucking his hand or a dummy for long enough to take a picture. Thankfully I am able to dedicate my entire day to this.

plonko Mon 24-Jun-13 09:19:35

Yy Stormy, being left did not help us at all. When they occasionally dared to respond to the buzzer it was to briefly watch him feed and everyone had a different opinion. We needed an expert.

Ooh Leni I meant to ask - does moving into your own place mean you can get a cat now?

OodPi Mon 24-Jun-13 09:27:44

plonko dd3 is 2.8 and still feeds at night. I was hopeful she would wean when I was pregnant like dd1 did but she didn't. She was starting to stop feeding when ds got ill and when we came home she wanted feeding for reassurance (I think) but I'm now trying to wean her off. Bit difficult due to having to be around at bedtime to feed ds otherwise she wouldn't ask. I'm now up to 47 months altogether think of all the burnt calories

OodPi Mon 24-Jun-13 09:28:41

Good luck with the passport pics btw, I think they aren't as strict with little ones so might be easier now than as a toddler?

plonko Mon 24-Jun-13 09:54:01

You've breastfed for FOUR YEARS? Wow. You're like supermum. Don't happen to be a bf counsellor do you?

pudtat Mon 24-Jun-13 09:57:41

I can't fault the attempt at support for bf I had even if everyone having a different idea was still true. Despite being transferred to the big hospital for our ventouse delivery, we were discharged after 1 night (yes, a night in which DS was fed formula by a mw) to our local midwife led unit where they regard establishing bfing as a medical need and will therefore keep you in. We stayed Sunday through Wednesday. Hardly avoided us having problems, although I guess I am still going in part, so maybe it did help.

Plonko, I remain amazed at the response to the red crystals as I was given in a nappy (ENGLISH VERSION) FINAL WITHOUT BLEED.pdf this nct sheet when they showed up which shows that urates (brick dust) is totally normal - bottom page 2.

pudtat Mon 24-Jun-13 09:59:28
pudtat Mon 24-Jun-13 10:01:35

Gaah! Blooming thing. Ok, try this (bottom of page) and if you want the picture click the link to the PDF doc on the right.


plonko Mon 24-Jun-13 10:31:25

Pud that's just made me really sad. We were told by mws that they're a sign of dehydration and we should alert someone. So we did. She was about to look at my latch when I told her and said 'right, plan B, this baby's thirsty.' And poured formula into him.

Ok, he's four months old and a happy, strapping little lad. I need to let it go!

somethingbeginningwith Mon 24-Jun-13 10:41:56

I think it's all down to personal choice in hospital now and whatever you choose they just let you get on with it without having anyone specifically trained to help either way. I was in for 3 days attempting bf as a girl opposite me was on bottles from the off. The only help I got was when I was struggling through loneliness and exhaustion when they topped him up with formula. There was one MW who told me I couldn't have top up and to just press on; when a younger MW heard that she came straight in with a cup of formula. Seems to be the answer now. I only know of one person my age (20s) out of about 10 who is bf-ing. I really admire bf-ers, I could only manage a week!

We had the urates too and were just told it was fine. That seemed to be the response to most things - "it's fine"

Blimey - I was lucky. I only stayed in one night but the midwives came in every few hours to remind me to feed, and help with the latch. To be fair mini-worse didn't need help. She was like a little snapper turtle.... snort snort snort.... SNAP....and suck. It was almost scary how determined she was. A bf-ing adviser also dropped by, but to be honest she annoyed me. Nothing wrong with her advice, it was just I had trouble taking it seriously as she looked about 15, spoke in that up at the end of the sentence way and had obviously learnt everything she knew from a book, rather than experience. The best tip I got was from a midwife who had bf 4 of her own, and that was feed lying on your side in bed. It's a lovely calm way to feed, and you can have a nap. Bonus!

StormyBrid Mon 24-Jun-13 10:59:30

Meanwhile, the man has just got home from work. This is the downside to working in call centres: constantly being told "Right, you're starting on X campaign in a month," then when you go back in a month you're told the company's lost the contract. Sigh.

We also has the red crystals in the nappy. DD was of course dehydrated and bloody starving in those first five days, and not pooing at all. As breastfed babies after the first week or so can go a very long time without pooing everyone kept saying it was fine and not to worry. If the NHS weren't so chronically underfunded and still sent out a midwife every day then DD wouldn't have spent the first five days of her life getting bugger all from my boobs and no one knowing.

Anypants Mon 24-Jun-13 13:21:16

How are you getting on with the passport photos plonko? It helps to have someone just off camera.who can hold their hands down and shake their favourite toy/something noisy in the direction of the camera. It also helps to set your camera to fire off in quick succession so you have a good chance of getting a good shot. I have a DSLR and poor DD has been photographed to death - I have lots of her looking drunk/trying to grab the camera/sneezing (v. funny) but also some simply amazing ones!grin

KFFOREVER Mon 24-Jun-13 13:49:01

eig and pud nope you are not the only ones still with broken sleep. Seems like the 9pm-7am sleep through was just a glitch now he wakes every hour or so after 2am. Either due to hunger or due to wind.

Ive got a lot to catch up on but thought id say hi. We had an awful morning and feel like such an awful mum. I tripped up down the stairs whilstholding ds. He banged his head on the floor. I was in a crazy emotional state thinking ive brain damaged ds but a trip to a & e put us at ease and ds is fine. My poor ds is blessed with a horrible mummy like me sad

LaLaLeni Mon 24-Jun-13 16:17:41

KK are you and LO ok?! I worry about that all the time... Do not beat yourself up - all stairs are risky to all humans in a nutshell, and unless you sit on your arse to come down them there's just no safe way to traverse them.

The BFing thing - we were bombarded with pro bf info, but the MWs and HVs were awful. They gave me the wrong info and stressed me out by being really rough with both DS and me. Consequently he didn't latch for 6 weeks so despite best intentions I never EBF - in the end I knew he just needed to eat because he was weeing blood and crystals really early on. The last thing the mw said as we left hospital was 'don't be afraid to give him formula'.

I needed a consultant to come to me just to reassure me that it wasn't going to be impossible for him to feed, but they all required me to walk for 30 mins with a screaming baby and then cry in public as I tried and failed painfully to get him on. I think it was the humiliation that affected me most, and even after he finally latched as you all know I never managed to feed in public.

I'd never seen anyone in my family feeding growing up, and anytime I'd seen someone feeding in public I looked away out of politeness, so the mechanics were a mystery until I had to do it myself. Maybe this is a big part of why it's not always easy or natural. Why do humans always seem to make natural things like nudity, sex, bodily functions so bloody taboo?!

Sadly the move won't grant me cat owner privileges - because it's a block of flats it's in the leaseholder agreement hmm

Did a few hours of work yesterday and feel so much better about myself!!

Rainbowbabyhope Mon 24-Jun-13 17:00:13

leni its amazing how much doing work makes you feel human again isn't it? I think it makes me a better mukm which is why I now work a bit every day.

DD latched on within minutes of birth while I was still sat on my bathroom floor! It felt completely natural to aallow her to lick and root immediately and although it was painful to start with and had bleeding etc breastfeeding did and does feel like the most natural thing in the world. It helped that I found birth very easy (would prefer to do it twice a year than go to the dentist for a checkup!)So had lots of energy to keep trying but also because I had a team of independent midwives who worked tirelessly with me for 4 weeks till we got it right. We were left alone for the first night and every night since and I preferred it as it gave me and DD space and peace to figure it out for ourselves!

vjhist85 Mon 24-Jun-13 17:51:18

KF that's terrifying but I've heard so many mums have done it, so glad you're both ok.

I'm in a rather middle class town in the SE and whilst bfing, at least initially, is the norm, the advice I got in hospital was shite. I was completely out of it after losing a lot of blood and waiting for a d&c for a retained placenta, and I wasn't encouraged to have skin to skin or try to feed straight away. I didn't have the wherewithal to ask! Then in pn ward I kept getting mixed messages re:positioning, I'd be told one way by one mw then told off for doing it that way by another. I was worried that dd wasn't waking to feed, no one reassured me. They'd tell me I had to wake her in an hours time, then when she didn't feed told me it didn't matter. I left hospital without being able to latch her on my own, and every time I had asked for help overnight when she wouldn't latch I was made to feel I was wasting their time. Not really sure how I carried on!

Dd has developed a habit of feeding for 20 secs then screaming blue murder at the 4pm ish feed, just as my milk lets down, which is very messy! She seems to hate lying on her side for it. Weird. Think we're going to move to just bfing first in the morning and at bedtime and ff the rest. For the totally controversial reason that...I can't be bothered... Well, not quite that, it's that I can't face the fight to bf at 4pm when she so happily takes a bottle. It's emotionally exhausting and feels cruel.

Today we hit 9th centile line! Feel so much better that we've got a bit of a buffer now.

And I'm also up in the middle of the night for a feed. We've gone backwards too, for about a month she was waking at 4.30-5.30 ish after a 10.30 dream feed, but we're back to 3.30 for the last few days, then a battle to keep her asleep after about 5.30am. Yawn.

KFFOREVER Mon 24-Jun-13 19:15:03

Yes we are both fine. I think i was just shocked.

Re breastfeeding. Mws tried to be supportive but they were all giving conflicting information. I was in so much pain bf that i would dig my nails into dh whilst bf. Each feed i would show the hcp and they would say the latch is fine but it still hurt like hell and ds would not settle for hours and only when i gave him formula he slept for hours. If only hcp were completely honest about the intensity of bf then maybe i would have prepared myself better. They always show happy mums with perfectly latched on babies guzzling milk in leaflets and dvds. Whereas the reality is a frazzled mum with a dissatisfied ds fighting at the breast rooting for milk.

KFFOREVER Mon 24-Jun-13 19:18:37

Sorry just read my post and there are a lot 'and'. Ignore me im just frazzled by today and still putting up with the crazy mil.

Rainbowbabyhope Mon 24-Jun-13 19:35:06

KF that's exactly how bf was for me for the first couple of weeks - agony! I would cry through every feed and have DH press my feet really hard so it hurt somewhere else. But I was pig headed and got on with it. My pain was irrelevant to me as I had a healthy baby who was alive and that made my discomfort worth it!

pudtat Mon 24-Jun-13 20:52:29

Oh Plonko. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you sad hmm but your LO is obviously going great guns grin. Just amazed at the different responses to the same stuff from people who supposedly know what they are talking about.

DS just wouldn't latch. Took a fortnight before he managed it properly. This is prob why I have the supply issues I do, not enough stimulation in the early days despite all the bloody expressing.

It never hurt though. Not for weeks. Then I started getting a couple of blocked nipple ducts on the left side and I just cannot seem to get them to stay clear, they really can be a bit lively!

Trying to get DS to take a bottle at the moment is a real bugger. Dream feed is the only one where it works a treat. Funny that now I keep trying to get formula down his neck after weeks trying to ebf <marginally hollow laughter>.

Glad you and LO are ok KF. I have nightmares about that here! Scary for you.

plonko Mon 24-Jun-13 23:23:38

Pud don't be silly, it's just all that conflicting advice. I feel sad that I panicked and sad at easily I was pushed away from bfing in my post birth haze.

Next time will be different! Forewarned is forearmed an all that.

KF horrible experience, so sorry you've beenshakenup. Who said owt about being a bad mum? Sounds like you care lots and love your LO deeply. Drink tea and be nice to yourself.

Stormy that sucks. Is that really the best they can offer him? I've worked in a few positions on casual as/when needed contracts and its hard going. I've spent the evening applying for this other job and in summarising my current re I feel I ought to quote the inifinite wisdom of Bernard Black 'The pay isn't great but the work is hard'

KFFOREVER Tue 25-Jun-13 05:14:11

Its quiet on here. Hope you all got lovely sleep. Anyone else finding night broken sleep hardwork or have yoi got used to it? My bones ache so much that when i feed/wind ds it hurts.

KFF omg how scary. V relieved you are both ok, and rest assured no one thinks it was your fault. Accidents happen, and you could just have easily tripped over on a completely innocuous flat surface.

I'm beginning to think I've had a ridiculously easy ride, as some of you really were put through it on the bf-ing front. Everyone delights in telling me that if I have another one it'll be absolute h*ll, as two easy babies in a row just doesn't happen. I love the support experienced mums provide to us first timers. So encouraging... not grin

Gorgeous sunny day today. DH left for Belgium at 5am, my parents leave for the US at 9am, and the worselet and I leave for.... oh, perhaps the high street at 10am. Anyone else here thinking that my option is looking a little tame in comparison?

Oh, before I forget for those of you on the poison powder what feed size and spacings are you on now? Tiddler-pom is showing signs of wanting to move towards a 4 hour spacing, which obviously I'm not complaining about, but as a clueless rooky I'm wondering whether it's a good time to change the schedule.

pudtat Tue 25-Jun-13 07:18:30

My joints are wrecked. I'm told by gp that it yet another side effect of the hormones and can take a year to settle. I have two trigger thumbs and about 7 trigger fingers each morning such that I can barely pick DS up for first few minutes, my feet lock so I have to take the stairs sideways and only one stair at a time, my wrists are very painful particularly when driving and my pelvis seems unable to take the weight of my spine for the first few minutes of being vertical. V annoying!

I seem to be more tired than ever ATM which given things aren't too bad seems ungrateful. Don't know if its the cumulative effect or just where his wakings are falling in my sleep cycle iykwim?

OodPi Tue 25-Jun-13 07:25:55

zpudtat anaemic? I've just added in Spatone again in hope it will help boost me. Sympathies on joints, I have similar though my fingers are ok but the crutches are wrecking my wrists/shoulders.

OodPi Tue 25-Jun-13 07:27:46

worsecester 3/4 mine were easy and the other is being assessed for AS so there's hope there wink

plonko Tue 25-Jun-13 08:15:32

Ood MIL said DP was such an easy baby that when he was 6 months old she got it into her head that she could cope with loadsa kids and by all accounts was really rather smug. 2 years later and her second child has ASD. Was awhile before she went back for her 3rd grin. They were a long time getting the diagnosis but its really helped - and he's recently graduated with a first!

Pud that sounds painful. Hope it doesn't last too long.

Worse I think it's wise to let baby lead with ff just as with bf. however, being practical if you've got a good thing going at night and know how much milk LO needs during the day then a loose routine might save your sanity. It's what I do. He goes 7-7.30ish at night, so he has milk every three hours in the day. There's wiggle room but its nice to be able to leave the house for more than 2 hours at a time! How much is LO drinking?

Passport photo fail, off to Max Spielmann today to se if he can help us. My cats forgotten how to bury poos and I need to book a smear test. LOVELY.

KFFOREVER Tue 25-Jun-13 09:07:27

worse it was bloody scary. We was on our way to baby massage too but of course we missed it. I was adamant with dh we were going to move. (we live on 2nd floor with no lift) but dh reminded me everywhere we go there are stairs. I was crying on the way to the hospital and as he was seen by the doctor of course by then ds was cooing away as if nothing happened. Now the challenge is to face those dreaded stairs again with ds.

Im giving poison to ds. The amount he has and what time varies. Approximately he has between 4-6ozs every 2.30-3.30hrs. Although i must say hes not so keen on having milk after a 5am feed. He will usually wait 4hrs after that feed.

pud having painful joints are hard. Are you aneamic too? Ive read that its a symptom of sleep deprivation.

plonko good luck on take 2 of tge passport photo. Please pass on your wisdom to us when you have succeeded. Ah the dreaded smear test. The things women have to go through.