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Dec 08 mums - any more for any more?

(988 Posts)
JumpJockey Wed 17-Apr-13 21:02:20

New thread! Hope this is ok smile

McKayz Wed 17-Apr-13 21:07:51

Thanks Jump.

Deidrie, sad Sorry DS is being trouble at the minute. Fingers crossed that he comes out of it soon.

DeidreBarlow Wed 17-Apr-13 21:11:57

I don't think he'll ever come out of it think I've bred Satans childhmm

Honsandrevels Wed 17-Apr-13 21:31:06

Oh Deids, do you know what led up to it? He just sounds like he has a short fuse that in time he'll learn to control it better. Try and relax, wine, bath.. tomorrow is another day.

Sybs Glad to hear of other early teethers. Everyone recoils in horror when she shows them. There isn't much of a gap as the adult teeth are so big already.

Zj you are right that she got her first teeth at 3 months. Arti is at the other end of the scale!

Rubes Hope you are ok.

JumpJockey Wed 17-Apr-13 21:45:06

Deids, can you pop up and take a look at him sleeping? Even when I've been utterly pissed off with either of mine, if I look at them all sleepy and snuggled up it calms me down again. That way it's easier to start again the next morning. A bit like never go to bed on an argument - never go to bed still wishing you could chuck your child out of a window.

Hmmm, perhaps as a title of a childrearing book that might not sell so well.

sybilfaulty Wed 17-Apr-13 22:21:47

I can see it would be a big seller!

Deids, I've been there too, it's a horrid feeling. He is a dear little boy really. Pop up whilst he is asleep and stroke his head. I regularly do this to remind myself that I love them really. Hard when all buttons pushed. Hugs to you XXXX

JamInMyWellies Thu 18-Apr-13 07:34:57

Dudes you poor thing. Bloody children really are sent to try us. I do the same as sybs they always seem much sweeter while asleep. Unless they are asleep in your bed at 3am <glares at DS2>

Rubes what's up chick?

Thanks for the congrats. Hoping to know ignore it for a few wks and let my body do its work.

JamInMyWellies Thu 18-Apr-13 07:36:11

Bloody iPhone! Dieds not dudes

ZuleikaJambiere Thu 18-Apr-13 08:27:18

Just marking my spot on the lovely new thread, and hoping DeidsBoy (or even DudesBoy!) has got out of bed the right side this morning

beans37 Thu 18-Apr-13 08:43:56

JAM! Yay! How very very exciting! Will keep fingers and legs crossed! I keep forgetting I'm even up the duff, to be honest, apart from having to hitch up my v comfy maternity jeans! No time to look out for the flutters etc. think I felt them far more with DD2 at this stage.

Deids, poor lamb. Miserable feeling so fecked off with your littles. They all push us to our limits. Did you look at him sleeping last night? How are you feeling today?

DD1 got into her school. Yay! But it's really DD2 getting into nursery that I'm fretting about a bit. Bring on 30th April to find out. Eek! Need to do school run!


Indith Thu 18-Apr-13 10:02:24

I get you back on my threads and then you go and MOVE! HOnestly. I have no chance of catching up. Must got and work. Really must. I'm giving the dcs a bit of a mummy day to day so the littlies are with the CM until 3 then I'm grabbing them and doing school pick up so we can go to the park and play together.

Congratulations Jammy!

DB I'm sorry you are struggling with your boy. I second watching him sleep. "NEver go to bed feeling like you want to throw your children out of the window" is excellent advice. I'm sure the book would sell millions. In fact it should probably be suggested as the next MN book title. Seriously. It captures the tone of this website perfectly!

Dd didn't get into school. For the first time they have had to reject Catholics even before they get down to sibling level. It is crazy. The head is being lovely though, think she has all the sibling appeal forms now so she is going to get that underway and I think she seems to be suggesting that it will be fine but the impression I get is that they will be having to turn down some appeals this year for teh first time EVER. They NEVER turn down appeals. Playground talk though is that there have been quite a few applications form miles away, people who have moved away but still want their kids to go there and stuff. We'll see. TBH though I find that a bit random, because even if they are miles away if they are Catholic they are still ahead of dd who is local and has a sibling at the school.

Oh well. Work!

Rubena Thu 18-Apr-13 10:37:35

Thanks all. It was just a shit hole arse buggery day. Dh had a bit of an exam looming meltdown and declared he's having a "motivational crisis" with less than 2 weeks left he's been in a rut. Not good. Then found out didn't get 1,2 or 3 school choices but was kicked while down with being offered the only school in Surrey which is well know to AVOID. Not in a month of Sundays is he going there. I don't even drive down the street the school is on. Its rough.
Dh was always thinking independent school from age 7 anyway, so I guess it's getting moved forward as winning appeal is highly unlikely in ours apparently, and they leave you hanging until a week before term starts which would be just awful.
Frantic morning of calls and We have an appointment this afternoon with one of the local private schools. Some are already full with massive wait lists and only one other we are waiting to hear back from. Did all this research ages back and now in a panic so haven't slept a wink worrying about all this, also as we will be moving in a couple of years or possibly earlier. So its all temporary and It's all the unknown.
But we have our health and things could be much much worse, I am aware of this. All will be fine.
Oh and the dog vomited everywhere as well as awful diarrhoea overnight, then the robot vac is programmed to run at 3am - you can imagine the rest.

Deids I've just seen your post. So sorry about the rough time you're having with ds sad hope all looks better soon.

On a nice note, had a lovely day catching up with a couple of friends and their kiddies who came around. I couldn't stomach a drink for 3 weeks during all that flu then we managed to get through 5 bottles if champagne in an afternoon / evening! FIVEsmile

Must post as phone can be dodgy.
Very happy for all the school acceptances. Least there's some good news with the results!

Sorry Indith but sounds like it will work out x

Indith Thu 18-Apr-13 11:19:57

Rubes I'm sorry, you are really having a hard time. I know the school stress well. It was hideous appealing for ds1. At least this time we have more security with being higher up the priorities.

I know it is so, so stressful. BUT you could flip it over and look at it another way. You will be moving soon so really, it doesn't matter that much. all you need is somewhere that is reasonable even if it isn't all that good. So long as it isn't an "over my dead body" school then it isn't that important. You just need somewhere with a friendly atmosphere which she can enjoy. I understand the allocated school is not an option but hopefully you can get on the waiting list for better ones or find an ok prep. You can instill the important values in her at home and support the early literacy and numeracy stuff at home. The important one will be when you move as that will be the school she will be doing most of her education in, doing SATS in etc.

sybilfaulty Thu 18-Apr-13 12:02:16

Huge hugs to you rubes you lovely girl. Reception can often be a year of flux but they are adaptable at that age and move schools etc easily. Hope this school today is good.

How are you today deids? Thinking of you and dear H.

Been working at home this am and accidentally silent 200 quid in boden. Oops. Naughty me.

sybilfaulty Thu 18-Apr-13 12:03:36

Spent not silent. Oops again.

sybilfaulty Thu 18-Apr-13 12:04:34

Needless to say, haven't done any work either. I must knuckle down.

Right, 3 from me so I'm off. Have a good day xxxx

EffiePerine Thu 18-Apr-13 12:42:13

Rubes: so much stress for you sad. Not how you want your first school application to go. Fingers crossed for a speedy and good solution.

Dudes (please tell me if you hate that name cos I am liking it a lot): I (6th?) the looking-while-sleeping tip. I've needed it a LOT.

Jj: glad I'm not the only one horror struck at the idea of 3!

DeidreBarlow Thu 18-Apr-13 12:59:52

Oh rubes what a shocker!! Really hope you get the school thing sorted, not really what you need at the moment.

I'm liking Dudes, in fact I often refer to DS as 'my little dude'. I did check in on the little dude last night, it made me cry...a lot! I am hormonal so that made me weepy. But his luttle dace all angelic and all i could think was 'why do you do it!!' Anyway this morning he woke up and came to ask me for a snuggle. Said his hands would be kind today and he wouldn't do it again. But we have been here before. sad

DeidreBarlow Thu 18-Apr-13 13:02:00

Oh and JJ "never go to bed feeling like you want to throw your children out if the window" would be an amazing book title!! Where do I buy itgrin

Indith Thu 18-Apr-13 13:26:47

Yes, you have been here before but he is learning. He is learning and remembering and that is so, so important. Some kids just explode more easily than others and children wear their emotions on their sleeves, they take time to learn to bite their tongue or to stay their fist and use words instead. A couple of years ago in his birthday ds unwrapped a book after having unwrapped a few things of lego or playmobil. His face dropped, he threw it to one side and said "that's boring, I don't like it." right in front of the giver! Last Christmas he unwrapped the garage (the one I ranted about that is suitable for 2 year olds), his face flickered with disappointment but he managed a brilliant smile, an almost enthusiastic "wow" and thanked his grandad. In those couple of years between 4 and 6 or so they learn so much about social norms and considering other people.

Rubena Thu 18-Apr-13 13:31:41

Just dropped ds at Pre school and added dd today so we can tour this school. They had a running list of where all the kids are got in hmm
Just gutted i couldn't even give them one - although none of his mates are going to our first or second choice anyway.

Deids he will come round. Ds got in trouble and was back chatting teachers at Pre school last Monday. All because his little mate was / is naughty and he decided to join in. Crikey he got a stern lecture. He was do upset I'm hoping it was enough. We'll see.

Add me to the list of horrified by a third - and that was before we knew we'd be stumping up for independent school from Reception year!

Rubena Thu 18-Apr-13 13:34:26

Indith ds has done exactly that a few times re gifts. I've felt like I've been beating a dead horse trying to explain how to react. Glad you said that I feel slight better, I always get so stressed when someone gives him a gift.

Vagolajahooli Thu 18-Apr-13 13:34:34

Oh ladies you've had me happy & in tears this morning catching up on here. And fair bit of OMGs at Rubes post. First of all Rubes. Sorry about the stress I can imagine. I don't want you to send DS there so please don't, fingers crossed you can get him into the private school. Also sorry but I had to laugh out loud at the Roomba thing. Is he ok, did it get all up inside his wheels? Glad at least you are feeling well enough to tolerate 'liquids' again.

Dudes, you know how much I love your boy, he's a white vagboy2. When you wrote what he said about his hands I just burst into tears, I'm a bit emotional anyway today, & for the littledudeboy to say that, so precious. I blame his teacher, I've never liked her.

Jam wonderful news, good on DH for getting one past the goalkeeper.

Nolda your moving news is very exciting.

& ZJ will you be removing the goalie soon?

Lady I share your language class homework issues. I've got dutch class tomorrow morning & haven't done a thing.

Hi to everyone else sorry for the absence I've been really busy with my next assignment & have had the boys off sick. Plus DS1 had his first gymnastics comp & had loads of extra classes. Also DH is having a bit of a nightmare because he is currently owed 3 months worth of pay. He got paid December in February but that's it. The third party company that pays his contract is being really dodgy & not paying. They are blaming system errors but it seems more likely that they have financial problems. We keep getting given dates we'll be paid then the day comes & goes & no money. The latest is next Tuesday. We've had to suspend work on the London place until we can pay for the rewiring & dh owes twp months worth of tax so we are likely to get a fine. The whole thing has put us in debt on all our cards & UK overdraft & we can't rent our London place so in all it will probably cost us around 3000 in lost rent & interest. And that's if we get paid next Tuesday. We covered all the mortgages this month but we won't be able to next month. Fingers crossed.

But this morning I got some news that made me realise it's just money. I can't say much because I'm crying writing this, but a dear friend lost his wife this week. They have a 3 months old baby girl & his wife just found the PND too much. Sorry I can't write more & im sorry to dump this on the thread after all the good news (apart from poor Rubes & roomba). But it helpz that you know. I think of Traceface & feel so grateful that she made it & Spot. I just wish...

JamInMyWellies Thu 18-Apr-13 13:39:29

Gosh Vag that is so tragic. Sending you a massive squishy hug. Such a horrible thing to happen.

I do often think of Trace and I hope she is doing ok.

Rubena Thu 18-Apr-13 13:44:02

OMG Vag that's sad. It does out it into perspective. So sorry sad so easy to get do consumed by things that are nothing in the grand scheme of things......

Re Roomba, it was everywhere. Worst possible scene you could imagine. A mix of vomit and poo. Roomba got bogged. Dh completely dis assembled it and dried it out. Working fine again now but Un programmed for a bit until I know the dog is ok.

Anyway, Best go and clean up a bit for my meeting with the head mistress hmm

Urgh I'm so sad about your friend.... Emotional here too and no def def def not preg!

Rubena Thu 18-Apr-13 13:48:40

My smilies are coming out all wrong on the phone. Pay no attention to them the hmm was suppose to be a sad face - although my emotions are all over the place. Predictive text is doing my head in too.

Rubena Thu 18-Apr-13 13:51:41

Oh and thanks Vag I def won't. I couldn't sleep at night sending him there. I know it's going to be hard enough seeing him go off to big boy school, let alone somewhere awful. I just told the pre-school staff and they all went oh no stay away from that one sad it's under review etc with Ofsted. it's just horrible. So, bankrupt we will be, but at least I'll be able to sleep at night.

Indith Thu 18-Apr-13 13:54:20

Oh Vag sad I'm so sorry. Love and strength to you and your dear friend.

McKayz Thu 18-Apr-13 13:54:24

Oh Vag that is so devestating. sad

DeidreBarlow Thu 18-Apr-13 13:56:46

Oh darling vag, you poor love! What awful news, your right news like makes you truly grateful for what I do have. I really wish I could come by give you a big hug and a brew or even a wine. Thinking of you x

Honsandrevels Thu 18-Apr-13 13:58:54

Oh Vag, that is awful. Pnd is such a bastard. Lots of love and light from us.

Rubes Is your robovac completely ruined? I can imagine the disaster that was! How very stressful re schools. There are lots of advice threads in the primary education topic which might help if you are thinking of appealing.

Am I the only one who wouldn't dream of going in and looking at my sleeping darlings in case they woke up?! At the end of a bad day I'm just thankfull they are in bed, and that makes me happy enough not to want to throw then out of the window!

Indith Sorry to hear you are having school stress too. Have they changed the criteria?

Honsandrevels Thu 18-Apr-13 14:03:17

Cross post-tastic there.

DeidreBarlow Thu 18-Apr-13 15:51:34

Bloody awful day for DS, have genuinely bred a monster. Can't even look at him sadsadsad

He just keeps saying he doesn't know how to stop. I don't know either so not much hope sad

sybilfaulty Thu 18-Apr-13 15:59:32

What's happened today darling? You sound so sad. Can you take him for a run in the park so that he can tire himself out and use up some of that e energy. Hugs yo you xxx

DeidreBarlow Thu 18-Apr-13 16:35:01

I am sad, so is he but he genuinely can't seem to control his temper! He scratched one child, pulled the ear of another and the hair of another. He claims one of them stood on his fingers so he pulled his hair. Thing is he doesn't differentiate when these things happen as accidents or on purpose and lashes out on all occasions!

I also realised that about 80% of my conversations with DS revolve around his behaviour, who he has hasn't hurt etc. I genuinely have no idea what he does in a day I just assume he spends 6 hours hurting people.

He is the boy no one wants to play with now & who can blame them! sad

JumpJockey Thu 18-Apr-13 16:47:32

Vag darling so sorry about your friend sad

and Deids, am just popping cheekily on at work but really hope you and DS can work something out to help with his behaviour. Sending you big hugs.

EffiePerine Thu 18-Apr-13 17:24:20

Vag: that is such sad news, and I teared up too thinking of how we all struggled through those early months with each other, and how we all did little checks when we were worried. PND is such a horrific condition sad. Sending you big hugs. I really hope the finances get sorted too. It may be a blip in the grand scheme of things, but still very stressful for you and DH. I hope your DH isn't too upset, I think it can be very tricky philosophically for the main breadwinner.

Dudes: as Indith very wisely said, it sounds like an emotional response, as much as my firstborn's tendency to burst into tears at the slightest hint of being thwarted. There's a difference between reacting and trying to deliberately hurt someone. That said, is it worth having a chat with your health visitor or GP in case there's another issue to rule out? Does he have any sensory responses that make it worse? I know I need to watch noise levels around DS1 for example, and he is very sensitive about hair washing and brushing. If there's something in his environment that he wants to stop now because it is hurting him, that might explain the lashing out.

Oh, crikey Vag. I am so, so, sorry to hear that. What a horrible shock. Lots of hugs to you. And you're right, it does put things in perspective.

Rubes, that is a real bummer about the schools, and your hideous day/night. At least on the schools front a) you have the choice and b) where you move to might have some really good (or at least good enough) state schools so you might not have to be shelling out for too long.

Deids I saw your post last night and felt so sad for you, and was hoping today would be better. How stressful sad. Do you think the school he goes to in Sept might be more supportive than his preschool? And I know that's a long way off, but maybe there's something that you can do beforehand? Have you considered seeing a child psych or behavioural specialist privately? I know they can be ££ but maybe just a couple of sessions might give you some tools you could use?
Also a friend of mine whose son was having some similar issues to your DS found this website really helpful:

Thanks for asking about the DSs, they're now fighting fit again (although we have crap sleeping hangovers from the illness so gonna have to bite the bullet on sleep training again). They've given all their lurgs to me though, so am struggling with sinusitis and sore throat. Bleurgh.

Hons I would never check on mine either smile.

EffiePerine Thu 18-Apr-13 19:52:34

Dudes I agree with Spot: the school is going to have a vested interest in working with you on behavioural issues and no, he isn't going to be expelled for lashing out. If that were true much if DS's class would have been booted out long ago! Is he worse at preschool, or is this something you are seeing at home / with friends too? Maybe something about the preschool environment is stressing him out.

Vagolajahooli Thu 18-Apr-13 20:26:26

Thank you lovely friends. What would I do without you. I still feel quite bereft but a friend in Australia is starting a little fund to raise some money for a mental health charity & I know money isn't everything but it makes me feel a bit less helpless. I keep coming back to the sadness though. Today we rode home passed a beautiful daffodil field & the boys stopped me & went & picked me some daffodils as they know they are my favorite. Then like a lightening bolt the thought that her little girl will never be able to pick daffodils for her mum hit me. I teared up & the poor boys got confused. They have been so sweet though. I got the news this morning before the school run & tried so hard not to cry in front of them, but they were looking at me so sweetly over their breakfast clearly seeing I was uoset & I just burst out. Ds1 started to cry too & poor DS2 just cuddled me. I still feel a bit numb. I also feel angry, she was admitted to a psych unit in Brisbane & they let her out on short leave. Then she, well she, took her life. I just can't stop thinking about my mate. They were such a brilliant couple, both vets, they worked in Madagascar on a research assignment. In a little vet clinic on the Isle of Wight & then back in Australia. They had such a great life to live together.

Sorry I need to get this out I think.

One other thing I need to get out is about dudesboy. I don't want to give him excuses & I know the hair pulling wasn't the only thing. But to be fair getting your fingers stepped on does really hurt. I wander of when school starts & there bis a bit more work to do & a bit more order.

Honsandrevels Thu 18-Apr-13 20:40:25

Vag Have you thought about maybe writing a letter to her baby for when she is older? Something that talks about all these amazing trips, little anecdotes about your friendship. I lost my dad before I was born and I treasure snippets of info about him from his friends. It gives a different perspective on their life. You might find it helps you let your grief out too. Such a sad situation.

Deids From what you have said previously preschool were not dealing with ds well. Is his short temper meaning they automatically assume he is responsible for incidents. Lashing out because someone is standing on your fingers is quite understandable.

JamInMyWellies Thu 18-Apr-13 21:16:26

Hons that is such a lovely idea.

Dieds god you poor thing. He will not be expelled. I do think you need to get some outside help speak to your HV or GP. I also think your nursery are utter pants at communicating with you or with helping little dude.

Can't believe I forgot to say congrats, Jam! Really lovely news. grin

Rubena Thu 18-Apr-13 22:10:31

Oh Vag. On a very small, nowhere near like it scale, I kind of know what you mean. I was gutted with news if schools but it was a culmination of things so hopefully not as pathetic as it sounds. Dh was a star and diverted the kids as he knew I was meltdown status last night. He even left little sticky labels everywhere telling me it'll work out (to be fair he got a new labeller and is giddy about it hmm) but its hard when the kids can sense tour mood anyway. I'm crap at hiding my emotions. Even from kids.
You are a good friend to people. A lovely person. It's why this thread has stayed in tact. Everyone here is lovely and here for everyone else.
It's a lovely idea for them.

Deids as same same as it sounds I really think he will get more structure at school and things will change. I'd be in bits too. Can you get some independent advice like others have suggested? I wish you could visit down this way or we could sort out a meet up like we constantly plan to!

School today was bloody lovely. Fears allayed. Securing a place, and on standby to tour another potentially If a place comes up before sept. I feel lucky that we can [gulp] hopefully afford these schools. I'm still not convinced we can though hmm but dh always so unstressy. I know that's not a word.

Nice to see you spot. We still need to sort out a wine date.

sybilfaulty Fri 19-Apr-13 08:20:49

Oh vag, I am do sorry for your loss. That poor family. Thinking of you and sending love xxx

Vagolajahooli Fri 19-Apr-13 10:59:05

Hons that is a brilliant idea. We have started up a little email group to get the couples friends from around the world together on this and start a fund for her DD & I have suggested your idea Hons. One positive out of this is that people who haven't seen each for ages are getting back in touch again. I remember when my cousin died way back just as all our Dec08's were being born, it triggered all of us cousins to reconnect & it's has been quite lovely keeping closely in touch ever since.

Rubes your DHs notes made me cackle out loud. And speaking of appliances have you heard of a thermomix. It's the latest big in thing in Australia, have you heard of it? Hooray for the nice school & really what would you prefer expensive holidays or peace of mind?

Oh and good news here, DH has been paid, hooray, we can breath again & I can afford to go buy him some black hair colour to cover the mass of grey he has developed in the past month.

beans37 Fri 19-Apr-13 11:08:42

Oh gosh, it's so sad and awful and horrible. It is so hard not to cry in front of the children, especially if you're a bit of a heart-on-sleeve type person, which I am, and suspect you are too, Vag. Your boys are glorious, though, picking flowers for you. How lovely.

Rubes, sounds like the stress of schools may be sorting itself out a bit? Fingers crossed. We were discussing whether to go private for our two if DD2 doesn't get into our local one as her year is so big. Hoping not to have to, though, as I don't think we'd be going on holiday again. Ever.

Good news here is that I'm off and away for a weekend to Lyon in a couple of weeks, child and husband free! A friend of mine lives there, so am tootling out by myself. I am going to confess now that I've only ever flown on my own twice before, so it's going to be a lovely adventure! I am so weedy! I can't wait! Then I have a weekend in Kent the weekend after, again without DH or DDs. Am going to miss them that weekend, as both my sisters are going and we are off to pick furniture from Mum's lovely house as she's downsizing and won't need it all. Think it may be a little heartbreaking. Then in June am going on a hen weekend in Edinburgh alone again! Lots of time off for me! Hoping it'll make up for DH buggering off to two weeks cycling in July/August! It's putting a bit of a caibosh (spelling??) on his training schedule. Hee hee hee!

Deids - how are you doing this morning? How is DS? How was his day yesterday?

I have such a terrible headache at the moment, I can hardly think straight. Driving me potty. Think the painkillers will set in soon. Got to love paracetamol when you're up the duff!

Ooh, and getting quotes in for our building works next week. Hopefully this new baby will actually have a bedroom before it's born!

Artichook Fri 19-Apr-13 11:11:45

Oh I am so glad that your DH has been paid Veg. Can he get some guarantee that there won't be future problems? Like could his company use a different third party to handle pay? I was so sorry to read about your friend, just tragic. I am glad you liked Hons' idea about writing to the baby with some memories. My father died when I was five months old and my Mum asked his friends to write about him, I have a lovely box of memories and descriptions of him from those that knew him best, written while the memories were vivid.

Rubes you really have been having a bad week. I am sorry to hear that your DH is so stressed about his exams but it incredibly sweet that even when he is stressed about his career his thought to do those notes for you. I love that! It sounds like the private school route will work out for you, but also consider wait lists. Around here lots of people get no schools in the first allocation and then get told dismal stories about wait lists but usually they get a good school if the persevere with the wait list.

Deids I hope that your DS has a better day today. Have you tried asking for advice on the behaviour/development boards? I know that wider MN can be awful but there are also lots of very knowledgeable parents out there. I have a book recommended on MN called "How to talk so kids will listen and listen so kids will talk" and its really helped me think through how to get the girls to understand what I am asking them to do.

Did I tell you guys about our school results? I cannot remember now. We got our first choice school which is this brand new free school and obviously I should be happy but I am feeling so very disloyal to DD1's school and I do hate the politics behind the free school. I have got myself in a right state about it which is mad because it was my FIRST choice!

Today is the first day of my maternity leave and I think I am just generally discombobulated by all the change. I am looked forward to being at home with the kids for the rest of the year, but terrified that I will find three too hard. I am pleased to be a lady of leisure, but most of my friends won't be at home with babies so I am scared of being bored and lacking a support network. I am excited DD2 has a s=good school but worried how to do two seperate school runs. Basically I feel quite anxious about everything and can't quite settle. I hope it is just hormones. Maybe I need to try some relaxation techniques.

beans37 Fri 19-Apr-13 11:24:13

Oh Arti - poor you feeling like that. I get like that sometimes and things get magnified in your mind. Would you consider getting an au pair for a couple of months? Could you do that? I've persuaded DH to to that for me come October, once he's had his paternity leave. Just til I get settled into the routine, so will only be for 3 months or so. But enough to get my head round 3??! And they can help with school runs and bath and bedtime, which is always a bonus - oh and housework. Brilliant! If you want to come and visit us, you're always welcome!

Rubena Fri 19-Apr-13 12:12:39

Funny you should say that Arti. Just off the phone to Surrey CC and they said we missed out by literally a whisker and will be at top if list with exact ranking avail May 15th. She sounded quietly confident we would get offered it with all the movement. If that's the case I will be in a right state as I'm liking the idea if private schools after touring them as although expensive, you can see the unbelievable difference, and what you're paying for. That said, we always intended to send them private initially from 11 then we decided 7 ish even but never really from 5!
They have a really good option for dd to start in Sept also, using the govt grants for only about £200 more per term than where she goes now And she would be doing 5 half days! [SO confused]

I see your worry as well Arti It's so stressful all this school stuff- something i never thought would be, really. I think you / we just have to do what works and is easiest / best for your family without worrying too much about loyalties etc. easier said than done I know.

Glad your dh got paid Vag. No I haven't heard of one of those? Will google!

Beans you sound extremely busy the next few months! Great news in the dc3 bedroom! grin

How are you Deids?

DeidreBarlow Fri 19-Apr-13 12:13:59

Vag, that was so lovely of your sweet boys! I love the idea of putting all those memories together for your friends children.

Rubes, glad the school visit went well and has eased a bit if stress for you smile

DS is home with me today, so he will be fine. Someone asked but his lashing out is basically at pre-school only. The odd sibling squabble here, but that's it and he never hits out at his Sunday school either. He knows right from wrong. But he says they annoy/ruin his games/hurt him and he gets cross. He also says he's 'bored'. A lot. I reckon school will be better for him. A rigid structure and less opportunity to get bored! He's also miffed that the boy who's hair he pulled never said sorry for standing on his fingers. He said "it's always my fault". sad

After a sleepless night I'm pretty pissed at pre school tbh. They had the inclusion officer in and I think most of her suggestions etc haven't been implemented at least to my knowledge! Yes he can be challenging but he basically gets removed from play for 5 mins and then told its not nice to hurt. hmm. So it's all been utterly pointless

I have thought about taking him to the GP but haven't as its pretty much a pre school thing. At home he will just sit, play, eats ok, goes to bed ok....I think I may venture to the wider MN for advice.

DeidreBarlow Fri 19-Apr-13 12:16:44

Beans all that "you" time sounds wonderful! Enjoy & make the most.

Arti can understand you feeling a bit daunted by everything at the mo. it's probably hormones and the fear of the unknown. Once bubs is here you will be like a super woman putting us all to shamegrin

Rubena Fri 19-Apr-13 13:03:54

That's an embarrassed face Deids! Now I'm very smile that I've been stressed about silly stuff (which I thought as much anyway) smilesmile

I think Deids boy is highly intelligent and not being challenged enough therefore getting bored and its resulting in this. I think things will improve at school and you're right about GP thing.

DeidreBarlow Fri 19-Apr-13 13:56:43

Ha ha I can't tell what any of these faces are... What's this one then blush?

And thisconfused? I'll still get them wrong though!

Rubena Fri 19-Apr-13 14:05:39

Phew. No idea they are weird on the phone!
Im paranoid. Story of my life.

DeidreBarlow Fri 19-Apr-13 14:07:58

Funnily enough the only one I can figure out is wine. Maybe a few of wine and I'll figure out the rest ha ha !

Nolda Fri 19-Apr-13 14:38:08

Deids, after a few wine you'll be unable to do that one either. However, you will cease to care!!!!

Vagolajahooli Fri 19-Apr-13 15:39:23

After a few of wine deids you won't care what they mean.

I agree with Rubes, clearly Dudesboy is a genius and from what you say seems to have very good grasp on what it right & wrong. I think some of the, how shall I put this, less 'capable' children in his group are just boring cry babies. Your right it is up to school, he's not trouble, he's a boy, boys need to run around & have their own time & space. I do ds2's teacher, she has two boys of her own & really understands how ds2 works. All the kids at his level get an hour in the gymnastics room a day, completely unstructured play. They are basically let loose on the equipment. She also lets them have a good run around when they first I arrive before quietly asking them to sit in a circle for the goedemorgen song. Personally I think that does the trick.

Rubena Fri 19-Apr-13 15:45:29

Yeah. Tis a goodie wine

Vagolajahooli Fri 19-Apr-13 15:46:36

Rubes with the schools try to imagine how you would feel if you got a letter saying DS had been accepted into your first choice school? If you'd be happy that's good, if you'd be disappointed then that's your answer as to whether you should proceed with the other intake.

Fare out I am so tired. DH is bringing pizzas home from the best pizza place in the Hague. The owner is from Napoli, so he makes them prima. Tomorrow is our anniversary, we only remembered yesterday so haven't got anything planned. I quite fancy just going to our favourite Chinese then a friend is going clubbing with a girl she knows who is from Manchester & is desperate for a club night so we might meet them afterwards. I'll definitely have to cover dh's greys before we go there.

Vagolajahooli Fri 19-Apr-13 15:48:24

"I do ds2's teacher"!!!! I meant "I do LIKE..."!

Artichook Fri 19-Apr-13 16:02:41

DD1 has a friend round. I just asked the friend whether she'd like carbonara for dinner. "What do you put in it?" she asked. "Bacon, Parmesan, cream and eggs" I reply. "No thanks" says she "I only like carbonara with pecorino and pancetta. If you have bacon maybe consider amitriciana". Um, she is 6, and I may kill her.

JamInMyWellies Fri 19-Apr-13 16:18:44

Arti PMSL. That is hilarious.

Rubena Fri 19-Apr-13 16:29:43

Too funny Vag!
Yeah I did imagine getting the letter. And I'm a bit disappointed. I've also spent the last 2 days highlighting all the downsides of that state school. The joke of it is, my first choice was our closest yet not far away from it there is another school and all the people in that vicinity probably have siblings at our closest plus its a better school so they choose that one. They are closer than me to it but its still not their closest. The whole system in my area is ridiculous. MP needs a stern letter.
Was thinking about the holiday affordability thing while being crippled by private school fees and one upside is the holidays and term dates are different to state schools so we may actually still be able to get on a standby flight in school holidays, which we definitely would be able to do if we were in the State system therefore resigning earlier may not be as necessary and Holidays overseas still affordable. Having said that, we've just booked a week in Spain for summer on a confirmed ticket anyway!
Ugh. Anywho. May have a wine and forget it for the evening at least as not a lot I can do for now!

I've bad grey hairs for ages but I just noticed a silver sheen over dh the other day.

Arti that is hilarious!! That'll be ds after a term in private school. How could it not - the fees at one include all meals and snacks, all books, and a fountain pen. A FOUNTAIN pen. Struth. blush

I remember a boy on one of my flight once when I asked him what he'd like to drink he replied "appletiser" and when I told him we didn't have that he said "that's preposterous" he was 7 shock

DeidreBarlow Fri 19-Apr-13 16:38:16

Oh my word Arti that is hysterical, who's her Dad Gordon Ramsay??!! grin

I'm making pizzas for dinner vag, washed down with copious amounts of wine. Oh and in other boring deid ramblings I am feeling better about next weekends Hen Do. I'm sharing a room with a good friend and we haven't seen each other in a while. So we are driving there together which done emergency Prosecco for the room while we get ready. I reckon that should encourage the social butterfly in me

Rubena Fri 19-Apr-13 16:38:55

Oh wow. Why is a wine on the phone a martini and on the computer a red wine? Did not know.

Ill tell you what's preposterous, I'm all out of vodka.

DeidreBarlow Fri 19-Apr-13 16:41:54

Rubes that's scandalous!! No vodka? Shame on youwink

Rubena Fri 19-Apr-13 16:48:30

Wait. I do. But it's a special addition number and don't want to crack it for an arvo drink. I have wine. If shady Lady started at noon, then I can have a tickle up now. grin

Bunch of old soaks.
Count me in grin.

Rubena Fri 19-Apr-13 16:53:19

Relax, I have Cointreau. That'll hit the spot. grin With lime and soda and the sun is out.

Deids good you feel better about hens. Good friends will always stand by you. If they don't, then bugger them.

Rubena Fri 19-Apr-13 16:55:03

Hello Spot! Cheers wine

Up yer bum wine

DeidreBarlow Fri 19-Apr-13 16:59:37

Ahh F - it, I'm in early dinner V & T for me. Cheers me ole muckerswine

JumpJockey Fri 19-Apr-13 17:09:37

Arti that's stupendous smile Can just picture you thinking "I must tell the ladies this they will love it" grin

wine to you all my lovelies, just off for the weekend, FIL is coming down for DHs concert and he's a real sweetie so looking forward to some good nattering. Just quickly, Deids glad you're feeling cheery about the hen do, and three cheers for prosecco!

Vagolajahooli Fri 19-Apr-13 17:17:08

Right then this is scrapping it. I've got vodka & apple juice. It wasn't chilled so I had to scrap up some frost from the freezer drawers. See it pays not to defrost the freezer then. Proost!

sybilfaulty Fri 19-Apr-13 17:19:38

I am going stir crazy with my 2. Both have temps, crampy tummies and awful diarrhoea. Worse when they eat and goes straight thorough. Up all night with both of them and now shattered watching nanny mc phee on laptop. M curiously unaffected. Clearly has innards of steel.

Vag, what do you think it is? Dd2 looking rather thin but dd1 fine as slightly better covered. On and off since tues. should I take a sample and take to drs? Help

Love the pasta talk. Take it you'll be making your own for miss fussy? I'd have to sell one of mine if they said that. I don't think mine wd know what carbonara is!

I might have yo crack open wine. To be sociable only, of course. HIV!

sybilfaulty Fri 19-Apr-13 17:20:31

Oh pants, that should say "hic!" Of course. Damn this phone !

Vagolajahooli Fri 19-Apr-13 17:25:48

Actually it's quite nice.

Arti that seriously is too funny. The poshest things ds1 has asked for is panini & once he asked if a friends mum could make polenta. Otherwise he's more a sausage & mash boy.

Deids I meant to say before I know exactly what you mean on the spendy thing. A lot of the girls I know here have husbands who work for Shell as well as a decent pay check they get housed in these enormous multistorey houses & private international schools payed for. They often organise 'girls nights out' talk about hair, make up & what they will use their 6 business class flight allowance for this year. Dinner is always a minimum €50 each and often more like €80-100. I really don't find it fun & as the food in restaurants that great I find it a complete waste of money. Thankfully I have founda couple of friends who are less affluent & we tend to have dinner at home then meet for a drink. Much cheaper & allthe money is spent on alcohol.

Vagolajahooli Fri 19-Apr-13 17:29:10

Sounds like a gastro bug, no vomiting? Looks like it manage to get past their tummy & straight into the bowel to work it's magic. It could pass in a day or two but I think a sample would be a good idea. Just in case it gets bad, at least they will already have a sample on the burner.

sybilfaulty Fri 19-Apr-13 17:34:48

Thanks vag. No one has been sick but everything is passing straight through. I'll get me yoghurt pot out on Sunday night of no better. Dd2 will have wasted away.

Rubena Fri 19-Apr-13 17:39:57

Sybs that sounds horrendous. But sounds like a bug. Badly going around. Friends ds had it quite badly but over in 24-36 hrs.

Vaguely that sounds nice. I've had vodka and squash before smile
I just did pizza for kids and ds said "oh no not pizza, can i have a bagel then an apple and banana"? Meanwhile dd is rolling around whaling on the kitchen floor because I won't give her chocolate for tea and threw a piece of pizza across the room because "it has yukky green bits on it" Talk about polar opposites.
I give up. I'm having wine.
Oh she now has the stool from the drum kit and is climbing into the counter to get the confiscated toy. What a little treasure.

Rubena Fri 19-Apr-13 17:40:55

Vaguely was meant to read Vag! Altho both works.

Vagolajahooli Fri 19-Apr-13 17:46:57

Flip I'm hungry DH still not back with Pizza I might have to eat one of my offspring if he doesn't get here soon. The boys & I are watching Star Wars. Love that they are old enough to like it now.

Vagolajahooli Fri 19-Apr-13 17:49:10

Vaguely definitely works I wrote that previous post about 15mins ago but forgot to press send. Dh arrived Pizza digesting

Artichook Fri 19-Apr-13 18:19:07

Miss Carbonara has left having refused a Frube for pudding because she doesn't like yoghurt outside of a proper pot...

Wish I could join you all with an aperitif, no alcohol here for months. I'm meant to be going to a cocktail reception tonight but I feel season three of Breaking Bad may keep me away.

Vagolajahooli Fri 19-Apr-13 18:29:58

I love breaking bad but only up to season one. Yoghurt from a proper pot, what does that mean, terracotta?

DeidreBarlow Fri 19-Apr-13 18:33:06

Never seen Breaking Bad just working my way through Dexter at the minute.

DS loves a frube...

Rubena Fri 19-Apr-13 18:46:57

Hilarious. DD loves anything like yogurt out if any receptacle. She'd eat it off the floor. But DS hates frubes and gets all weird about them because he can't see past yogurt being eaten only with a spoon. He has asked me for poached eggs just now (scrambled wont suffice) and insists on eating it with a place mat, and knife and fork. I suspect this school thing has happened for a reason hmm

EffiePerine Fri 19-Apr-13 18:48:41

Deids: if no problems elsewhere then preschool are doing it wrong. Wine a good plan. I have a nice bottle of v unfashionable German white in the fridge and am trying to decide whether I should wait for DH to come back.

Vag: good news on the cash and the pizza grin

EffiePerine Fri 19-Apr-13 18:51:35

Am boggling at Miss Carbonara - I thought mine were bad enough with demanding babyccinos. My parents already suspect I am putting it on by having my tea after 5 and sometimes calling it 'supper'.

sybilfaulty Fri 19-Apr-13 19:01:57

I may have mentioned what I need to do with a yoghurt pot for poor dd 2. Miss amatriciana would not approve. I do recall one of Lucy's friends rejecting my pesto supper as the pesto wasn't home made. I didn't tell her that I didn't even try pesto til I was 22. It's virtually a food group here

Effie- sample the wine now, just to make sure it's ok.

EffiePerine Fri 19-Apr-13 19:16:19

DH home after 9. Wine broached. If I get carried away I can always hide the evidence in the recycling grin.

EffiePerine Fri 19-Apr-13 19:18:23

Rubes: am also boggling at what DS2 would look like after 5 minutes with a fountain pen shock

DeidreBarlow Fri 19-Apr-13 19:19:32

You couldn't give DS a fountain pen, he'd obviously stab a teacher with it wink

JamInMyWellies Fri 19-Apr-13 19:54:06

Oh I have just started season 3 of Breaking Bad - LOVE IT!

I too will be having a non alcoholic drink tonight. Bum. Have not had not have enough alcohol recently to then have to ruddy well give it up for 9+months .

Vagolajahooli Fri 19-Apr-13 21:46:33

A fountain pen, what about the poor left handed children they are going to have smudgey pages.

Sorry but I had a little giggle about dudesboy going at his teacher with the fountain pen.

Rubena Fri 19-Apr-13 22:07:02

Alright, enough of the fountain pen mockery! I did kind of laugh too. You are funny Deids! Ok I started it I suppose grin

And actually jokes aside, DS IS one of those poor left handed kids - well he writes his name on everything he does with left hand, but does sometimes colour in right handed, so and I've been trying to figure it out. Anyway, if he does go there, one look at their IT dept and he won't be giving a moments thought to a bloody fountain pen! Twas Brilliant.
I'm really hoping I get a look at the other school I like, as sports is his thing, which the other school is slightly more impressive with. Guess what happens happens. Silly part is we will prob move shortly so all the stress for nothin!
Just cooked a rather disappointing individual roast lamb. Wine is very impressive.
DH pressure washed the wool rug that Roomba dragged the vomit and shit all over tonight. I had it up near the bins to be chucked as thought Unsalvageable after the dog vomit / shit / robot vac incident, but coupled with the also recent curry takeaway stains I thought enoughs enough. Then today the thought of school fees had me retrieve it and out came the jet washer.... Cannot believe how much dirty water has come out. Looks like a new rug.

Vagolajahooli Fri 19-Apr-13 22:27:16

Excellent, well done with the rug Rubes. Left handed kids are awesome and are usually ambidextrous, with a tendency to write with the left hand. Ds1 writes with his left but plays violin as normal & plays ball games with both hands. Great they've got good IT. Sports is important but you can always make up sport stuff out of school. DS1 does most of his sport as out of school activities.

Rubena Fri 19-Apr-13 22:44:22

Yeah dh a lefty. As is my brother. And both do the ambidextrous thing too. Rug result is amazing. State school choice 1 has amazing grounds and pool. One independent is tiny and v personal but uses sports grounds across road. The other on 22 acres and only slightly bigger.
Right enough of the school talk from me. I'm sure you're all bored or irritated to death. Can we go back to Beans poo talk as I'm much more amused by that - although I did add an element of poo today too.
That rhymes. Have another wine Rubes.

JumpJockey Fri 19-Apr-13 22:58:54

Ah ladies, you're on fire tonight! A thought - has anyone heard from WG recently? She's been awol for ages.

Arti what a hilarious house guest. We now have to call it carbanana after a mis-hearing in which S said " but mummy it has no bananas in it?"

Rubes glad to hear the rug was saved, that did sound like an utter nightmare situation. School dilemma, presumably there's no need to rush to a decision?

Sybs hope the tummies are better soon.

Right lovely ladies, big hugs and goodnight <sigh have been reminiscing back to college days recently when we'd hit the bar at 11, now am all tucked up in bed at 10.30, never mind!>

Rubena Fri 19-Apr-13 23:18:00

Not really rush for decision now JJ as not much more we can do. The rush was to view and secure Independent school and one of 3 had 1 place left, so have secured it fully aware we may forfeit £300, and #5 on the waiting list for the other. Then there's Surrey C Council and when they pull there finger out sorting out all the shuffle around after 1st round of allocations etc which could be anytime (if at all we hear anything) between now and the last week in Aug. So now we sit tight.
DH has just come down and is done with the books for now so will cease my boring ramblings! xx

Rubena Fri 19-Apr-13 23:19:52

sorry 'their' not 'there' - cannot stand that spelling error! Really going now..... promise.

Rubena Sat 20-Apr-13 16:22:53

Loving the weather! My rambling killed the thread. Back to Twitter then.....thanks

Artichook Sat 20-Apr-13 17:14:18

I think the miraculous appearance of the sun will be what killed the thread Rubes. We were all startled into baring our pasty legs and running out doors. We had a lovely picnic and hour on the boating lake in Hyde Park. DH now cooking a salmon tray bake while I lie about "supervising" the girls on the trampoline.

Did I tell you guys I'm off for a spa day and night in a country hotel with six girlfriends tomorrow? So excited. I really need to get off my backside and have a good session with a tube of Veet, I'm just not sure I can reach any of the Veet needing parts right now.

DeidreBarlow Sat 20-Apr-13 18:03:55

I'm here although I've just been for a run and am struggling to breathgrin

McKayz Sat 20-Apr-13 18:06:28

I'm here. We were out seeing Meat Loaf last night. DD slept really well for my Mum and Step-Dad and drank from a bottle. That's despite refusing to drink from one for DH all week.

Then we've been out in the forest this afternoon enjoying the sunshine!!

How was Mr Loaf, Kayz?

McKayz Sun 21-Apr-13 06:26:14

He was amazing better than I thought he'd be. But he looks knackered, he says he's retiring soon and by the look of it he should.

beans37 Sun 21-Apr-13 15:40:57

What a fab weekend! Happy days here in House of Beans. Had friends to stay and we've spent 2 days in the garden! Now sufficiently sun drenched and tired. We're watching Jurassic Park at 4. Girls v excited, but staying outside until then. Although.... It is quite nippy out here now! Clouds, damn them. DH has had to go to work this afternoon, which is a bummer. But I've bought myself a new rotary washing line and garden swing seat cushion. That's how I roll, man.

I cooked up a storm last night. Had another couple round and we had smoked mackerel and baby beetroot salad with horseradish cream to start, then roast lamb with anchovy and garlic and all the trimmings. Then a bought lemon tart with raspberries. Got to say, in an annoying way, I did myself proud; cooked up a storm!

Arti, how was your spa day? Did you enjoy it?

DD2 has started to stammer really badly. Mum says its something called Normal Non-fluency and I should ignore it, but she's getting quite frustrated and it's hard not to prompt her. Any other experience of it?

Brrrr. We're going inside!

Indith Sun 21-Apr-13 19:16:06

how is it sunday night again already?

Ugh, up since 3am. Gonna be a long day!

Any advice about specific event-related nightmares?

Yesterday, T thought we'd left him in the car and forgotten about him. He was inconsolable for ages (we hadn't, btw). He settled fine at bedtime, then at 9.30 had a night terror (screaming, not really awake, but saying "i'm here" over and over).

Then at 3, he awoke with nightmares about being trapped away from me and not being able to get out. These lasted 3 hours - he couldn't get into deep sleep as he kept waking every 10 mins with a new bad dream, all on the same theme.

I keep trying to reassure him that everything's fine, but does anyone have any ideas for how to stop it happening again, or at least my dealing with it better when it does? I feel really terrible about it, it's the first time I think he's felt really scared about being alone and that I might forget about him sad.

sybilfaulty Mon 22-Apr-13 08:09:19

Oh poor you and poor T, spot. That sounds miserable. I am afraid that we have never had that here so I can't offer anything helpful other than yo send you a huge hug and hope that someone wise will be along soon.

Shameless request ladies. I am doing the swimathon on Saturday and am woefully under sponsored. I have just shared the link on my FB page so if anyone has a few quid to spare and could wang it to the wonderful Marie curie cancer care, I'd be very grateful.

Ah, a seat at last. Have a good day everyone.

Vagolajahooli Mon 22-Apr-13 09:27:11

Spot ds2 had night terrors for a bit though not related to a specific incident it was around when he was dropping his sleep and I think it was Arti who said it was related to being over tired which made sense. It resolved when I put him to bed earlier. I do think they go through stagesof being afraid of losing us. Ds2 is super clingy at the moment which may be due to school and missing being at home with me, but he does have a fear of being left behind & he looks visibly relieved & elated when I pick him up from school bless him.

Beans when are you in Lyon we are down that way in the may holidays. Dh has a conference in Paris so we are going there with him, then he is taking a week off and we are driving down to stay in a little on site van in one of our fav csmpsite chains. Even when it's cooler weather I can't get away from campsites. I'm quitellooking forward to it, but I have an assignment due on the 17th, 5 days after we get back so I need to get moving on it so I don't have to do much while I'm away

Rubena Mon 22-Apr-13 14:32:48

Spot, sorry to hear about Ts nights. I was confused about when you said yesterday he got upset and thought you'd left him in the car? Do you mean he just suddenly started saying all that in the day? Was he napping at the time or something?
I'm not much help either but we've been through phases of ds waking in the night really hysterical but we can't get any sense out of him. For a period if about a week he would wake one or two times in the night or sometimes every other night but he never remembered in the morning. The only pattern I noticed was it was times when he was really really tired - over tired. It just sorted itself out in the end. Dd has had one or two nights like that but not for ages.

Schools update look away if bored by this. After all weekend going over options we had decided that if we got offered soon any one of our 3 choices that would be the preferable situation as we'd never planned on independent school until either secondary, or from when we moved from here in a couple if years if a decent state school wasn't available.
I decided to ring The council today to clarify a few things and get numbers on second round offers from last years intake. She got all our info up then put me on hold for ever to make another call. When she returned she said she wanted to double check with her people before giving me wrong info as there was a provisional offer next to ds's name. She confirmed a firm offer was sent out this mornings post for our first choice! I could have kissed her grin we are v pleased not to be paying private school fees until at least another couple / few years.
So I will now stop banging on about the school thing.

My friend just completed the London marathon yesterday to raise money for Bliss. Her target was 5k and she raised more than 6k I believe. Her baby was born at 28 weeks and is all lovely and healthy. She only started running from scratch about 4 months ago. I'm so impressed.

Sybs, good for you. I'm on it grin

Artichook Mon 22-Apr-13 14:44:34

What fabulous news Rubes! And what a fast moving waiting list. I'm so pleased for you. I'm sure it's a good decision as although the facilities if private schools are alluring a good state primary is, in my opinion, a lovely way to start school: ultra local friends, a proper mix of the community etc.

Sorry to hear about T's nightmares Spot. As others have said I've noticed a link between being overtired and having nightmares. But ours were never about specific fears either. Why did T get scared that he'd been left? Can you talk him through what really happened and help him see it was a misunderstanding?

I am just back from a heavenly 24 hour break in the new forest: amazing spa, great friends, lovely dinner, stayed up to 1am setting the world to rights, gorgeous long brekkie and game of croquet this morning. Loved it. Now off to surprise DD1 by picking her up from school. I've never done pick-up on a Monday before. I quite like this maternity leave lark.

McKayz Mon 22-Apr-13 14:46:46

That's great Rubes!! grin

Poor T Spot. No help here as we've never experienced it.

Sybs, will do it tomorrow on pay day.

My bloody sinuses are playing up. My nose, eyes, cheekbones and forehead hurt like hell. No GP appts so I need to ring tomorrow. It's my birthday tomorrow, I want a lie in not having to get up and try to get an appt.

beans37 Mon 22-Apr-13 16:12:03

Sybs, have sponsored. How are your sickly daughters?

Arti, that sounds smashing.

Kayz, yuck. You have my sympathy.

Rubes, so glad about the school situ. Hurray!

Girls watching Scooby Doo. They just love it. I've seen all the episodes when I was little. Genius! Dog snoring gently. I'm so very tired. Am dreaming a lot at the moment and I wake up knackered by it!

No tips on night terrors here, I'm afraid. I guess just comfort as best you can. Is there any way your DP could sleep inT's bed for a night or two, Spot, and you share with him so you can snooze while you comfort him? I did it with DD2 the other night when she was ill and it meant I got some rest. And she didn't cough much, just knowing I was there helped, I think. I'm really not a co-sleep person, but found for my own sanity it helped, or I'd have been up every 5 mins with her.

DeidreBarlow Mon 22-Apr-13 16:56:49

Ahh Rubes that is excellent news on the school situ!! Such a relief for you.

Spot, no advice on the night terrors as I've never had any experience. I guess all you can do is keep reassuring him that your not going to leave him, and hopefully he will feel secure and the scared memory will fade. Poor chap & poor you.

JamInMyWellies Mon 22-Apr-13 18:06:39

Super news Rubes grin

beans37 Mon 22-Apr-13 20:01:52

I started cooking myself a double cheeseburger at 7.45. I have finished eating it already. Deeeelicious! Oink.

Thanks for the tips, folks. I think tiredness did have a certain amount to do with it, (the car thing was that we normally take the stuff and Billy into the house first and come back for him, but maybe we took longer than normal and he started to panic). Also, my friend who I saw today suggested there may be a certain amount of separation anxiety with all the chat about school. Even though he isn't young for his year, he is quite immature, especially emotionally, and the thought of having to go to "big school", and the "grown upness" it entails, may well be quite daunting.

At last a local job has come up, but it's badly paid and a pretty dull topic. It's pretty comical in fact. But not sure if i should go for it because it'd be regular money (it's FT, 9-5), it's not too far away (two train stops) and I could then go onto something else. But they want an all singing, all dancing, policy, press, web editor, internal comms, research bod, for well under 30K. I should probably keep on freelancing until something more interesting comes up, but it is tempting to go for it as it's a regular wage. Hmm.

Rubes that is top news about the school. You must feel so relieved!

Arti, what a wonderful weekend, and the first nice weather one of the year!

Kayz, am a sinusitis buddy for you. Have same symptoms, tried sudafed, painkillers, saline nasal spray and hayfever spray. I keep expecting it to go away, and it keeps not doing that.

Nice burger action, Beans!

Vagolajahooli Mon 22-Apr-13 20:23:40

Rubes that's brilliant news, what a relief. I bet you feel like you can breath again. Big glass of red for you then.

Sybly will sort out sponsorship when DH has sorted his pay into all the right accounts. Blimey I'm a bit of a keen swimmer, as I know you are, but 2.5km that's a long old haul. Is it in a pool or a body of water somewhere.

Kayz poor you that's a bit crap. Could it be hay fever? Happy birthday for tomorrow. Dh is still around isn't he?

Finally got started on my second assignment, I am a terrible one for procrastination. But finally made a start.

What a lovely day yesterday was so sunny. It is nearly Queens day here which is one gargantuan party, with a sea of Orange. But this year it is even bigger because Queen Beatrix is abdicating to her son Willem-Alexander. So we get a coronation this year, hooray! So anyway there is a big fair in town for Queens day & the boys had a blast at it and ate way too much sugar. Brilliant fun. They both managed to win a little prize too. Now bring on more sunny days please.

Vagolajahooli Mon 22-Apr-13 20:32:15

Cross posted Spot, that's a tricky one, they are asking a lot for the money. So do you think it would lead onto something else eventually? Would it be nice to have an office & workmates though?

Honsandrevels Mon 22-Apr-13 20:41:23

Brilliant school news Rubes!

Spot Never experienced repeated nightmares but there must be a book about them that explains they are just pretend etc. Topsy and Tim maybe? I know that won't be much help at night but it might help rationalise it in the daytime.

What's your second assignment on vag?

McKayz Mon 22-Apr-13 20:41:57

Spot, I can't take anything other than paracetamol or ibruprofen as I'm still feeding. I was almost begging the pharmacist today for something.

Vag, I don't think it's hay fever. I've never had hay fever symptoms, just get this now and then.

We're going out for dinner tomorrow so I am hoping I'll be ok.

sybilfaulty Mon 22-Apr-13 20:49:17

Kayz, when pregnant I had sinus trouble and used to inhale menthol crystals in boiling water. Big tent with a towel and breathe in. It helped me but I appreciate that it may be as useless a suggestion as a sodding gibger biscuit to someone with hyperemisis.

Cat, I would apply for the job even though the money is poor. Looks good on cv and convenient. It wd have to be strictly 9 to 5 though a d with a view to a move after a year or so to something where they recognise your fabulousness and reward it appropriately.

Thanks for the sponsorship and support girls. Hugely appreciated.

sybilfaulty Mon 22-Apr-13 20:51:39

I love hearing stories of your boys vag. You are giving them a wonderful childhood. They will have do many lovely memories.

Rubena Mon 22-Apr-13 21:08:39

Yes very relieved thanks ladies. And surprised at quick offer. Havent got it in writing yet so Mrs county council better have her facts correct! Big glass of red as I type Vag. Dh working again as he has been for ever but study leave at mo and literally I'm depositing meals in the office again!
Crikey beans that's food inhalation. Glad you enjoyed it. You're dinner parties sound beyond fab. If you ever visit me, I'm ordering takeaway unless you cook grin
Spot, that makes more sense. Hmm there might be something in all the school talk.
On the job. Congrats! I was kind of wondering if it could lead to something better, and the routine stability thing might be good, as would the people you would meet. I'd be tempted to say it couldn't be bad to give it a try and See how it goes. But I'm hardly the expert on this as I've only worked in my type job etc.

Kayz I'm the queen of sinusitis. Let me tell you. I really hope yours both don't carry on like mine did. It's horrendous. Not to mention the eye infections that follow. GP actually told me I'm getting bugs / sick more often because I'm working less now and not building immunity as much. Flu shot for me next year and that's a big statement from one terrified of needles. Thats crap why can't GP see you even for 6 mins? So many people just don't show up for appts. Even crappier that you can't mask it with drugs. Steaming even with something like Olbas oil works wonders though. Have lots of hot baths / showers. Happy birthday for tomorrow! Hope you feel better.

ShadyLadyT Mon 22-Apr-13 23:14:31

Waaaah, 128 messages already and I haven't even read most of them properly! (That will be my treat in bed). More soon but so chuffed about the school news, Rubes.

I was in Sheffield for the weekend and last week was just generally nutty. More anon.

sybilfaulty Tue 23-Apr-13 07:05:25

Happy birthday to you, dear Kayz! How old are you now? Have a fab day.

Many thanks to all who have sponsored me. Much appreciated.

DH is being a grumpy sod again. Why can't he just be cheery, or at least normal?

JamInMyWellies Tue 23-Apr-13 07:29:26

Happy Birthday Kayz.

Sybs ignore him that's what I do when DH is in a strop.

Preg ladies I have forgotten what everything is meant to feel like. But in the early early days that sort of period heavy tummy feeling is fairly normal isn't it?? I think I remember it happening with DS1 but not 2. Am I being bonkers? I do hate the uncertainty period of time. Gah!

Arti that sound like such a lovely wkend.

Indith how's the study going?

Vag I cannot believe you procrastinate.

Dieds how is dude boy?

sybilfaulty Tue 23-Apr-13 08:00:46

Jam, with all my pregnancies I felt as though my period might start at any minute. I think it's normal. Take care and take it easy.

JamInMyWellies Tue 23-Apr-13 08:12:13

Cheers sybs. It feels like so long ago I cant remember how anything is meant to feel like. As DH said at the weekend let the lunacy begin.

DeidreBarlow Tue 23-Apr-13 08:33:34

Happy birthday Kayz, how are the sinuses?

Jam I had that 'pre period' feeling for both my pg. So much with DS that I never thought for a second I was pg. Speaking of Dudesboy he is back at pre school today, currently full of good intentions but we will see what happens. I don't hold out much hope and feel sick. I will feel like this from now till I pick him upsad

DeidreBarlow Tue 23-Apr-13 08:35:44

Oh and sybs my DH is permenamtly grumpy. In fact he has turned into a real old man...I must also fill you in on his sisters wedding, which is a major source of his grumpiness! However it'll have to be later school/work calls

Artichook Tue 23-Apr-13 09:27:39

Happy Birthday Kayz. I hope you are being spoilt today.

Jam - I would say that period pains were my MAIN early pregnancy symptom every time. I constantly ended up going to the loo convinced I would find my period had begun. Sometimes the pains were so bad I had to sit down. How many weeks are you now?

Good luck to the Dudesboy for today.

and good luck on assignment two Veggie. What is your title this time?

Does anyone know where I can get nice garden furniture? I want a really lovely deck chair and maybe a hammock on a stand. I intend to spend the summer lounging in the garden!

Rubena Tue 23-Apr-13 12:26:50

Deids, positive thoughts that you hear good things about ds's day! Is the hens night this weekend then?

Jam I can vaguely remember similar gnawing dragging period type pain. [shudders] I'm sure it's normal!

Arti. We got our outdoor table / chairs / parasol from Casa Bella furniture through eBay. It's nice quality teak. Although dh put the parasol up about 4 weeks ago and it was a tad too early as got damaged in following days gale force winds. So he has some fixing to do to it and will aldo need re sanding and ill oil it again this year. I'm keen on getting a couple of sun loungers too, but may end up getting them elsewhere as I want the little pull out shelf on the side for my bubbly of course, and they don't seem to do that version gringrin if / when we do an extension, of / when we buy the house, it involves a deck off the master bedroom and a sun deck to one side. Essential item if outdoor furniture i say.

JamInMyWellies Tue 23-Apr-13 16:43:52

Thanks all, had a MMC inbetween 1 & 2 guess I am just overly worried it will happen again.

Dieds how did DS get on today?

Rubena Tue 23-Apr-13 16:57:02

Glorious weather. Had another garden picnic then went to the park. Ds is a speed demon on his bike now and dd on scooter and myself on foot cannot keep up. He got a telling off for going way too far ahead of us but got the message and I'm very proud of his skills after the long Winter and no practise.
No letter to confirm ds school offer so quietly shitting myself. Hopefully tmrw.
How's T Spot? And how did ds go Deids?

JamInMyWellies Tue 23-Apr-13 17:04:48

It will come tom Rubes.

DeidreBarlow Tue 23-Apr-13 17:10:09

Hello all thanks for asking after dudesboy.......I can report he's had a good daygrin. Although I think the pressure to behave has exhausted him, he can barely keep his eyes open! Lets hope he can make if through the week with minimal problems.

Yes Hen night this Saturday. I'll be in Chester by lunch on Saturday and then home Sunday late on. Given DS behaviour I think it will be good for me to get away from him a bit , so I can get back and appreciate him. If that makes any sense at all.

Rubes the letter will be on its way. Just because they say its going in the post doesn't always mean it physically goes to a post box. It may well be sat in someone's tray ready to post. Well that's what I tend to do at work anyway blush Don't fret smile

Rubena Tue 23-Apr-13 17:10:31

Thanks jam. I'm hopeless so called them again. Another person said same. Phew.

I am sunburnt!

Rubena Tue 23-Apr-13 17:13:17

Crossed with u Deids. So glad ds had a good day.
Oh good that's prob what she meant by "posted out today"!
Yes time apart good for both of you to appreciate. X

JamInMyWellies Tue 23-Apr-13 17:19:45

Excellent well done dudes boy

EffiePerine Tue 23-Apr-13 19:46:23

Good for dudesboy!

And happy birthday Kayz: I hope you've had a beautiful sunny day. I've been stuck in meetings all day so not able to appreciate it, but it's nice seeing the sun even from a distance!

Boys have been introduced to the Muppets via DVD - they are very keen. Phew. Fraggle Rock tomorrow. Am determined to lead them in the ways of righteousness (and obtrusive an antidote to endless Spider-Man).

EffiePerine Tue 23-Apr-13 19:47:30

Introduce not obtrusive!

Happy Birthday, Kayz! How are the sinuses? Did you take them to the GP? Hope you had a nice day despite them.

We haven't had a repeat of the nightmares, thanks for asking Rubes. He's def overtired at the mo, waking up v early thanks to the bloody avian orchestra outside the window. But putting him to bed early too.

Good work on the good day, Dudesboy!

DP in middle of doing his first paid photo shoot. It's just pocket money really as it's a favour for a friend of a friend, but a good start, nonetheless, as so much in this game seems to be about word of mouth and he is v good.

Effie, do you think they are only just ready for the Muppets? Or would they have been ready, say, two years ago? <desperately trying to get bloody Dora and Diego off the tellybox>

Nolda Tue 23-Apr-13 20:30:34

Spot, just don't show them the Muppets do Bohemian Rhapsody on Youtube, like I did, big mistake!

Nolda Tue 23-Apr-13 20:39:58

Happy birthday, Kayz! I hope the sinusitis is getting better and that you managed to have a good day.

Indith Tue 23-Apr-13 21:21:20

oh god mine adore Muppets on you tube. whenever they see the laptop it is can we gave the popcorn sing mummy? oh the popper de corn. over and over and over again. floor covered in text books, was making progress on my anatomy and physiology but snotty poorly baby woke up and dh is working. rubbish catch up as I'm on phone. work load is evil, very, very intense with no time to pause for breath. not long til first placement now.

EffiePerine Tue 23-Apr-13 21:49:30

Spot: give it a go. Also Fraggles. I reckoned I could always watch the DVDs myself once they had gone to bed. The Muppet Show Cast Album was one of the few musical things my roommate and I could agree on when we shared a room at uni a long long time ago. I seem to remember that I was listening to New Model Army and she was singing in a barber shop group, but we bonded over the Muppets grin.

EffiePerine Tue 23-Apr-13 21:54:38

Breathe, Indith! You're doing great.

McKayz Tue 23-Apr-13 21:58:24

Thanks for all the birthday wishes. Had a lovely day.

Except for GP who wouldn't give me antibiotics and said to come back in a fortnight if no better. I wanted to cry when she said that. Also told me to take lemsip and when I said I couldn't due to BF, she suggested stopping as DD is old enough to drink cows milk.

Useless woman.

Vagolajahooli Tue 23-Apr-13 22:50:15

Kayz babe, about the only thing that gets through to breast milk is chemotherapy, your fine with pretty much everything. I used to take codeine for migraine when ds' were feeding. Such a teeny tiny amount gets through to your milk and then of that her digestive system deals with it so next to nothing ends up in her. If your worried give the drug person a call on the BfN website.

So much to read today, now it's night time & I don't have time to respond. I will just say awesome Rubes that the other lady concurred, I'm sure they send it second class.

Yay for dudesboy.

You ok Indith, I remember A&P. When is your first placement.

You ok Jam? I also remember tummy pain, in fact I was taking brufen for period pain before I found I was pregnant with ds2.

Right need my bed chat tomorrow.

ShadyLadyT Tue 23-Apr-13 23:32:29

Evening ladies. I am typing this at high speed as I still have loads to do before bed - DP is not coming back tonight so am frenziedly trying to make good use of the time...then finish off by trying to catch up on the book for Book Group on Fri - my actual choice! Of course I have read it before, but years ago...(The End of the Affair by Graham Greene). I am also hosting so I have about ten years worth of tidying to do before then (and MIL comes the day after).

I have caught up now and here are some responses - as many as my tired fingers can muster!

Nolda, did you hear about your offer on the house you liked?

The Muppets - I loved them so much. Still do. I used to practically hold my breath before they were on the tv on Sundays at 5.30 in the late 70s. On Youtube, I have shown the girls a couple of Bert & Ernie songs (although they are of course Sesame Street - 'I Sing Myself to Sleep' and 'Rubber Ducky' - both are brilliant.

Jam - so excited for you! I definitely had that period pain thing - with DD1 especially.

Rubes, I am very relieved that things seem more settled about DS's school. And bless DH for being calm about it all, he is such a trouper. I hope his prep is going well. DD1 mentioned your DS tonight smile Oh, and to clarify, I did have a glass of wine on Friday lunchtime but it was only one and it was only that the good cheese just begged for it grin

Glad you've had a nice day, Kayz - just really hope you get better quickly.

Vag - shocking news about your friend. It's just so sad, I don't know what to say. But the letters idea sounds amazing. Any trips over here before the end of the year? And what is your routine like these days? I have less time than when the girls were tiny. I am not sure how that is, given we were renovating a house, but it most certainly is.

JJ - how did DH's concert going? And he is still singing - but are you getting any in?

DB - I can only echo the others who have said that your DS will be better when he starts school. The pre-school have mishandled it from the get-go. Just muddle through as best you can for now, that's all you can do. The fact that he's only like it at pre-school is a cause for optimism - the lashing out is not his personality, it's just how he copes in certain situations. Hang in there. As for having a grumpy DH, well, you know I have a grumpy DP...Glad you feel better about the hen do.

Money for going out, though....I feel your pain. I went to see lovely friends in Sheffield at the weekend. I really love them but I haven't been since autumn 2011...Anyway, the trainfare was £80, and with eating out (albeit cheaply) and all the other attendant costs it was a dear weekend. I would love to see people so much more, such as lots of friends in London, but often finding the £30 for the trainfare, taxi money from the station to home, eating out...I just can't afford to do it very often at the mo. Vag, I really understood about the horridness of waiting for your DH to be paid.

Anyway, I mustn't get moany. Arti, are you feeling any better about mat leave? I wish I could come into town to see you more easily. How many weeks to go? That anxiousness you are feeling - it is so so normal for the last stage of pregnancy. It is horrid, though. You mentioned on the last thread about how it was a shame that mere money would put me off a third - well, I guess it's not just money though the fact that I would ideally want another private birth is a big problem (I am so scared of not having the nice experiences that I had with DD1 and DD2). I still have other reservations...compelling in both directions. So we'll see...I am on Season 2 of Breaking Bad. I think it's very good but I do find it depressing and not very 'enjoyable' in the classic sense.

Oooh, Beans, what are you having done on your house? I love hearing about that sort of stuff. Oh - the stammering - DD1 had that a lot and grew out of it. DD2 gets it sometimes and I suspect the same will happen.

Whilst I am pleased that DD1 has got a place at the village school I feel a bit sad that she will soon be on the treadmill and, if I am honest, out of my zone of influence. I am not a control freak really (I don't think) but once they are at school, they start to move away from you. And it doesn't seem five mins since they were all our little babies! <weep>

Keep on with the swotting, Indith. It must be hard but it will be so worth it.

Oh and Sybs - of course I will sponsor you. xx.

Spot - how are the boys? Lovely that DP had his first paid shoot. How's his state of mind?

ZJ - will you be coming into London a lot more over the coming year?

I am flagging so I probably need to go to bed. Wednesday again tomorrow and have I even looked at my Italian? Nope. And we have a test!

McKayz Wed 24-Apr-13 06:35:47


Vag, I didn't think you could take decongestants. It can lower milk supply or something. That's according to BF networks drug sheet.

I've either got a stomach bug or food poisioning. I've been up almost all night with stomach cramps. Which have luckily subsided now and I've had an hours sleep. I just hope no one else is ill.

Indith Wed 24-Apr-13 06:36:31

while it is true lots if things can be taken while bf lemsip not one if them. the decongestants affect milk supply as they inhibit all body fluid production not just snot.

Vagolajahooli Wed 24-Apr-13 10:11:33

Argh I just lost a whole post! I don't have time to write it again I've procrastinated enough this morning. Jam I am the worst at procrastinating.

Artichook Wed 24-Apr-13 10:35:03

Hello pre-eclampsia my old friend. Stuck in maternity assessment ward on nicest day of the year. Please all cross your fingers for a speedy discharge as I am FAR from ready for this baby.

ShadyLadyT Wed 24-Apr-13 10:40:16

Oh Arti :-( How many weeks are you? Hope you get out soon (and that you've got something to read whilst you're waiting...) Keep us posted. xxx.

JamInMyWellies Wed 24-Apr-13 10:45:23

Oh arti bugger. Keep us posted.

McKayz Wed 24-Apr-13 11:06:33

Oh Arti, I hope it settles down for you.

Nolda Wed 24-Apr-13 11:07:38

Fingers crossed for you Arti!

Artichook Wed 24-Apr-13 11:18:16

Thanks all. I am 36 weeks so the baby would probably be fine if he had to be induced, it's just I am not ready in either a practical or psychological sense. Hopefully the blood tests they've just done will show my kidneys and liver are coping OK and in that case I can go home and come back on Monday. If the bloods are bad I have to stay in. I hate hospitals, I want to go home. Also DH in meetings so I can't get hold if him, not that he can do anything anyway.

Artichook Wed 24-Apr-13 11:41:36

Oh and I forgot to bring a book or even a decent newspaper. That was a rookie error. I've eeked out all the amusement that can be had from a nine month old copy of OK!.

EffiePerine Wed 24-Apr-13 13:20:04

Oh Arti I'm sorry you're stuck, but it's good that they are keeping a close eye on you. Is there no way of contacting DH? I am just down the road (if he's where I think he is) and could always try matching in to haul him out. I'd have to get the right chap though.

EffiePerine Wed 24-Apr-13 13:20:29

Marching not matching.

EffiePerine Wed 24-Apr-13 13:22:04

Re books do you have the Kindle app? I am reading a very non-taxing fantasy series set in Pictish Scotland at the mo, which is as far away from libraries and moves and staff issues as I can manage.

ShadyLadyT Wed 24-Apr-13 13:47:36

Yes, I was trying to think of ways to get books/mags over to Arti...any news?

Pictish Scotland? Wowzers! Interesting period of history. I am just reading a history of Britain at the mo (I am still quite near the beginning...)

Artichook Wed 24-Apr-13 14:27:02

Thanks so much ladies. Still awaiting results but have been given a copy of "Gone Girl" which is apparently the current no. 1 best seller about the world's most dysfunctional marriage. Cheery stuff! I've not yet got a car seat, cot or packed my hospital bag. I'm half way through painting our stairwell before moving on to the downstairs loo, and I've got a garden furniture order arriving on Friday. I need to be home!

EffiePerine Wed 24-Apr-13 14:36:30

LadyT: Juliet Marillier if you are interested. Literary value doubtful, escapist rating high. I have even been reduced to reading wampire books recently so I suppose this is a step up.

ShadyLadyT Wed 24-Apr-13 14:36:45

I have heard that book is quite good. Now listen - car seat and cot can be ordered at the click of a mouse (or phone!) Bag - start writing your list now, in case you have to give instructions to DH to get things for tonight. The painting can wait....and as for the garden furniture, surely there is at least one friend you can persuade to come round to accept the delivery? It will all be fine...maybe not quite as you'd planned, but totally fine.

I think if they let you out today, pack your hospital bag and buy your carseat etc at the weekend so if this happens again, you'll be all set.

ShadyLadyT Wed 24-Apr-13 14:38:53

Escapist is good sometimes grin Gosh, what's a wampire? It's sounds like a rather weedy vampire. Speaking of which, DD1 said to me this morning "X at pre-school told me that vampires drink your blood. Is that true? And if it is, what shape are they?" Groan.

EffiePerine Wed 24-Apr-13 14:40:16

Also you are unlikely to be let out with baby immediately so plenty of time to get stuff even if baby arrives sooner than planned. Which hospital are you in again? Honestly, if you need me to drop anything off let me know.

EffiePerine Wed 24-Apr-13 14:42:15

Sorry that was me mocking myself - I find the whole vampire tv/fiction thing a bit silly.

Artichook Wed 24-Apr-13 14:46:23

Gosh that is young to be talking about vampires. Did DD1 sound worried LadyT? I'm not sure if I mentioned but DD2 listened to me read DD1 'When Hitler Stole Pink Rabbit' and now incessantly asks about Hitler. It's not an easy subject to broach with a 4 year old. She keeps asking who I'd ask to adopt her if my choices were Ms Hannigan (from Annie), Bill Skykes (from her adapted Oliver Twist) or Hitler...

The great think about this hospital is there is a Daunt Books opposition. They've said I can have an hour out while we await the results. So Daunt Books here I come. Any recommendations for good reads (I've taken not of yours Effie!)? I think I need something relatively cheery right now, and something with a gripping and distracting story line.

Artichook Wed 24-Apr-13 14:48:24

X-posted Effie, I'm in Chelsea & West. There is a Peter Jones just up the road so DH could be dispatched with a list. I've spoken to him now and we agreed he should stay at work and rush to finish stuff for now.

ShadyLadyT Wed 24-Apr-13 14:57:07

She did sound worried. She is quite an anxious child as it is. I tried to make vampires sound a bit silly and insist they only exist in books and films. However, I am counting the hours to the first vampire nightmare because she has a horror of things (animals, even mosquitoes) biting her.

Book recommendations (yay for Daunts, a gorgeous bookshop): I am not very up on current books but I did have Running Like a Girl for my birthday - a memoir of someone who has never done any running before who takes it up and now runs marathons...supposed to be uplifting and has been recommended to me by several people. I remember enjoying The Unicorn by Iris Murdoch (a gripping, rather gothic tale); for sheer gorgeous comfort reading, you can't beat The Cazalet Chronicle by Elizabeth Jane Howard - a real delight. The first of the four is The Light Years. Anyway, I am sure there will be a lovely display.

ShadyLadyT Wed 24-Apr-13 14:58:48

If you end up staying there, Arti, a lady who lives in my village is Head of IT there so I can send things to you grin

Honsandrevels Wed 24-Apr-13 15:26:18

Oh arti, that's rubbish news. What is your bp? Anything over /90 meant an overnight stay in our local hospital. Don't worry about practical shopping stuff, easily sorted. Keep drinking too. Keep those kidneys busy.

LadyT I love End of the Affair. So moving.

Artichook Wed 24-Apr-13 16:29:22

Blood results are back and looking OKish so I can go home! Thanks for keeping me company on this most boring of days. I'll get ready this weekend ahead of my consultant appt on Monday.

Hons - my BP was 155/85 so I scraped under the /90 mark. My booking BP was 90/60 so it's climbed quite a bit and I had 2+ protein but the full bloods were surprisingly normal. Lets hope they stay like that. I am glughing large bottles of water.

DeidreBarlow Wed 24-Apr-13 16:36:49

Yay Arti that's brilliant news you can get home!

I'm now making notes on all the book recommendations. Been ages since I read anything really good.

Another good day for dudesboy.....

Honsandrevels Wed 24-Apr-13 16:50:00

Hurray arti! Brilliant news.

McKayz Wed 24-Apr-13 16:56:27

Great news Arti!

JamInMyWellies Wed 24-Apr-13 17:02:23

Super news arti!

Hurrah for another good day for dudes.

I am a bit ashamed to list any of the books I read as they are all tosh. But here goes. More Tea Jesus, You Had Me At Hello (romantic tosh), The Hundred Year Old Man Who Climbed OUt A Window And Disappeared a few of my recent reads.

But I saw you mention When Hitler Stole Pink Rabbit. That is one of my all time favourite books! Have you read DD1 the 2 follow ups? They follow her life until she reads adulthood. Just brilliant!!!!!

EffiePerine Wed 24-Apr-13 17:19:27

Arti that is fab grin. Here's to a peaceful few days.

Hooray for Dudesboy!

EffiePerine Wed 24-Apr-13 17:22:42

Jam: am seriously considering password protecting my Kindle so no-one can see what twaddle I read on a daily basis. With a bit of leavening from books I have read a zillion times before. I'm afraid they might take away my English degreegrin. Yours sound positively cerebral.

Rubena Wed 24-Apr-13 17:45:18

Ooo, not so good news, then great news. Glad for the happy ending Arti! I thought dh was there tmrw and was about to instruct him in with emergency supplies but he's at Mary's, and you'll be home grin

Also good news Dudes. Glad to hear Dudeboy a bit happier.

Want to ask also about biking and toddlers but will have to come back.... Dinner, kids and possibly sick rubes boy so gotta run....

Vagolajahooli Wed 24-Apr-13 22:26:33

Crikey Arti, what an emotional rollercoaster. Hooray for the C&W keeping a close eye on you. I loved working there felt more like hospitals back home. How are you feeling in yourself Art?

Hooray for dudesboy!

Ok I'll admit it I'm interested in that app book Effie. I only learnt about the Pics about 5-6 years ago and was a bit fascinated. But I thought they didn't know much about them. I guess with ancient history they can use a little artistic licence.

Now drinking water is good but small & often is best, don't want to over work them. Also try to limit sugery foods & drinks if possible. Apparently soy based protein is good for pre eclampsia but too much soy isn't good for baby boy pregnancies so maybe go easy on that.

Rubes we have one cycling boy in ds1 so experience there but I am not encouraging ds2 to cycle without his training wheels because once he is off with them he will want to cycle to school like his brother & everywhere we cycle which is well...everywhere.

Vagolajahooli Thu 25-Apr-13 11:58:33

Did I break the thread.

beans37 Thu 25-Apr-13 12:56:36

Yes Vag! Heh heh!

Arti, so glad all ok. Don't forget kiddicare deliver the next day, so always good for emergencies!

DD2 just had a horrible tumble outside Playgroup and has massive bleeding grazes all down one arm and swollen knees and a cute little graze on the end of her nose!

DB how is DS doing? Sounds like he might have turned a corner?

Loving the book chat. I f people like vampire type stuff, a high quality end of the world/zombie book is The Passage by Justin Cronin. I've just read the second in the trilogy called The Twelve and it was also v good.

Had book club last night. Reviewed The Woman who went to Bed for a Year, which was ok. And have chosen, My Dear, I Wanted to Tell You as out book this time. Meant to be pretty good. Suspect I'll weep!

Dog's on heat, so having to mop the kitchen floor rather a lot. Yuck.


Vagolajahooli Thu 25-Apr-13 13:39:04

What!!!! Why???? I don't want to know do I.

I got my first assignment back I only got 69%. She got picky with some of referencing & she wanted headings & a table of contents, it was a 2, 500 word essay FFS. Also I wasn't critcal enough, I knew she would pull me up on that I realised not long before handing it in that she would want that but it was too late to try to cut stuff out and fit it in. As it was I introduced an argument towards the end but didn't elaborate enough as I simply ran out of word count & time to skim other areas so lost marks there too. A friend who is doing a teaching masters through the same Uni said they mark their masters students particularly hard at this uni so I guess I should be happy.

More bad money news, we didn't figure inVAT to our London quotes so still have a bit to pay to have the balance paid DH is sorting it now.

Also, worst news of all a good friend from Derby has been diagnosed with a grade 3 cancerous lump in her breast. Ive no idea about breast cancer but that doesn't sound good. I'd love to go see her, she has three gorgeous kids, the eldest is ds1's age. Not fair.

Rubena Thu 25-Apr-13 14:19:10

Weird night of ds vomiting and high temp but seems ok after ibuprofen so gone to pre school today As its only a half day.

Sorry bout your friend Vag. Gosh you're having a bad run with friends and bad news. Life def not fair at times.
I reckon that's a good result for first assignment! Least you know what to improve on etc and they are tough there. You'll only go up from there.
Yes I can imagine it would be difficult at the age when they want to rude everywhere in a place where that's what you do for main transport!
I was wondering what most do at this age as I've realised it's not doable to ride straight from the house so need to go to the park really and prob is i can't keep up with ds if I'm on foot so need to ride myself with dd on the back, but then i cant get my bike onto the car roof myself etc. what on earth do people in London or busy places do? Ds hasn't got the road sense / experience to just ride with me from the front door. Im prob not explaining myself well.

Urgh beans I did that for a couple if years. We were going to breed from ours as she has a great pedigree and I had always wanted to but then I decided no way too much work with young kids around too & we got her fixed. Hope dd is ok.

Summer are you there? I was wondering, did you end up selling your P&T? We have t used ours in ages and thinking I could do with selling it.

Gosh I'm relieved about this school thing. Just talking to ds's key worker at Pre school and her son goes there. Says its a brilliant school and she uses the breakfast club s d after school club in an ad hoc basis and it is really good. Going to be perfect for the odd time I'm away and can book it at late notice and online. It's all very reasonably and I didn't realise it was all going up be so convenient. Also pleased that dd will stay at current nursery now.

Dudes. So glad ds is doing well.

Rubena Thu 25-Apr-13 14:20:46

Ride not rude obv.

Rubena Thu 25-Apr-13 14:42:57

What garden furniture did you buy?

Honsandrevels Thu 25-Apr-13 15:05:53

Rubes There is someone I drive past regularly who has some sort of contraption which fixes the front of her child's bike to the back of hers. On the way home (downhill) the child is no longer attached. Is that the sort of thing you mean?

Artichook Thu 25-Apr-13 15:22:58

Rubes, is there not a pavement outside your home? DD2 does ride her bike to school. Our route involves: pavement outside our house, she can bike up to bollards which mark t-junction of main road (she knows she MUST stop at bollards); I then walk her across the main road and we enter our local park where she is free to ride as fast as she wants but must stop at park gates on the otherside (she knows this too); I then walk her across another busy road and she then bikes on pavement to school only having to stop for one more small road. At this age she does understand to stop for roads, what scares me is people backing out of their drives and across the pavement. I've never really worked out what to do about that risk, I sort of just jog behind her keeping an eye out, except now I am pregnant I cannot really jog!

Today I have done IKEA and John Lewis and procured a cot, some newborn babygros, a mattress protector, a steriliser, a care seat and an unnecessary amount of make-up! So basically I feel a lot better prepared. Now that I am all ready I expect my BP will drop and I will end up going overdue!

Vagolajahooli Thu 25-Apr-13 16:00:20

I think Hons means a trail-gator, we have one of these and used it loads with ds1 to get him to the destination we wanted to ride at. We use it sometimes with ds2 now, it is ok if they have training wheels but better without so good for your ds. How far away is the park. You could do as Arti says and he could ride on the footpath while you ride on the road parallel to him. Or just use the trail-gator and detach him at the park. It clips away on your bike and is telescopic so long enough to get to him. It lifts his front wheel slightly but he can still pedal away.

Vagolajahooli Thu 25-Apr-13 16:02:45
DeidreBarlow Thu 25-Apr-13 16:24:22

Oh vag sorry to hear about your friend. sad

Rubes no advice on the bikes, DS is so slow on his it's painful! I could walk backwards and still keep up with him. DD is another matter, she's like lightening!

So DS has made it through the week. I was pulled over when I went to pick him up today. Apparently he kicked a girl for no reason. Anyway they said it was a one off and he's been brill all week. However DSs version of events is very different from Pre schools. Apparently this girl pushed him over, they both fell over and he admitted kicking out but said he never meant to hurt her hard! he also said he said sorry but the girl didn't have to because the teachers didn't see. TBH I
had no idea DS could articulate himself so well. But at pre school he just accepts that he's always wrong. I have a suspicion that DS is always going to be in the wrong, no matter what. So I'm gritting my teeth and with plenty of winewill muddled through the next few months!!

DeidreBarlow Thu 25-Apr-13 16:26:10

Oh and vag am I right in thinking that was your first assignment for quite a while?? That's still a decent mark. Plus you know where you went wrong, so you will definitely nail he next one. I can't imagine my brain functioning well enough to muster 250 words at the mo never mind 2500grin

Honsandrevels Thu 25-Apr-13 16:40:03

Vag There is a word function that practically does a table of contents for you these days. I think that's a really good mark, especially for the 1st essay!

Rubena Thu 25-Apr-13 16:52:01

Ah right, no, I don't mean one of those Hons / Vag. It would be too difficult with that as although the park is close, it's complicated to get there. Ie crossing a canal etc (over a bridge - we don't swim grin) but those parallel type gates to prevent cars etc. we actually have a closer park but it isn't as good however I think we will just have to use that one as it can be reached by mainly back streets and bridle way.
We actually live on a private road / cul-de-sac so no prob out the front and he often does ride up and down there, but after that its a very very steep hill to the good park which is actually too hard for him to wheel it down. He wants to ride further and faster these days and gets frustrated as i can't keep up on foot so wants me to ride too which is where the problem starts as i obviously can't watch him when he zooms off and I'm on foot with dd on scooter and often with the dog too plus he likes riding around and around the lake at the "good park"
I think I've answered my own questions though now as although He's good at knowing to stop at junctions etc its just what Arti you said about other people backing out of driveways and similar etc. but I think we will just stick to the very local park which avoids the massive hill a d have him go really slow until we get there where he can speed off.

I've just been jet washing the pigeon poo off the deck. That stuff is like armour.
'twas therapeutic though grin

Rubena Thu 25-Apr-13 16:55:13

Deids ds got in trouble for being naughty at tea time with food recently and they claimed he threw a piece of food. They did say it wasn't behaviour they'd ever seen from him and he was influenced by another kid. But when I gave him a lecture and asked him what happened he got really really upset claiming he didn't throw food and it was the other kid and he just laughed at the other kid and the teachers didn't see. He sounded quite genuine and I honestly think sometimes Pre school staff don't see half of what really happens.

SummerLightning Fri 26-Apr-13 13:28:30

Hello! Sorry long long time no post.
I have missed a lot and no chance of catching up. Have not even said congratulations to Jam how exciting!!

I have not been that busy so no excuse really for not posting apart from I deliberately don't go on mumsnet at work, and don't seem to be on my computer much in the evening which is where I would post from. A bit like deids said she was ages ago, I've been feeling a bit "same old, same old" and therefore not very interesting for posting. My work is seriously boring and quiet at the moment, and I guess I'm finding kids a bit easier work these days so feeling a bit, hmmm, what am I doing with my life!

deids sorry to hear DS is still being problematic at preschool. I have to agree with the others that it sounds like preschool are not entirely blame free here, but not sure what you can do about it. I have to say, I do like how vag is the staunchest defender of dudesboy ever and will not hear a word against him (quite right too)

rubes I am in a similar dilemma with the cycling thing, I can just about keep up with DS on foot (but I have to run), as he has fast spurts and then dawdles around for ages so it's ok. But don't really use pushchair with DD any more and she will always want to use her bike or scooter and then they are totally different speeds whcih is scary as DS disappears into the distance (he is quite sensible at waiting though). Can't wait til they can both cycle! May also get a trailgator. Sometimes I put DD on the bike seat on the back and cycle, though it then feels very slow and bit dangerous for me to go so slowly on the road, but a bit cheeky to go on the pavement. We don't have the hills problem round here though grin. DS also v sensible on the hills we do have ever since he had a face/concrete floor interface after going too fast down a hill. Oh and yeah I did sell the phil and teds as was never using it. It was a bit knackered (handlebar stuff split, tyres a bit knackered) so didn't get that much for it but that was ok. I sold it on gumtree.

vag was very sorry to hear about your friend. Actually just read back and both your friends sad. Hope the one in Derby is ok.

arti glad the pre-eclampsia is being kept at bay and you got out. Not long to go now, how exciting!

On the books front I also read a lot of trash these days. I read that "You had me at hello" too Jam, so trashy! LadyT did you hear there is going to be another Cazalet novel? Have forgotten authors name but she is writing another one, and I think she is in her 80s pushing 90, how awesome is that! Oh on trashy novels I read one called "Girls in white dresses", and I really enjoyed it! I can't exactly put my finger on why I didn't find it as annoying and trashy as most chick lit.

On the general moaning about money front, I have been doing more adding up than normal, rather than burying head in sand when it comes to finance. Shit, we spend a lot of money. On crap, on food, on eating out, on bits I don't know what. And HOW FECKING MUCH do I spend on bikes? Jesus! It's worrying.

Got friends coming round for dinner on Monday night, can anyone recommend me something easy but impressiveish to cook (*beans*, dinner party extraordinaire lady, cough cough). Preferably something that can mostly be done in advance.

Right gonna post this now. Tinies are watching Monsters inc, I am going to get started on cooking dinner.

beans37 Fri 26-Apr-13 15:12:18

Hi Summer! This http://uktv.co.uk/food/recipe/aid/631827 is v easy and deeeelicious! I do it without tomato as I don't like them cooked, and I add salmon and prawns. Yummy. And a good starter is smoked mackerel with baby beetroot and rocket, and I make horseradish cream with it. Literally, horseradish sauce mixed with single cream and serve as a dressing. Yum. I buy pudding. Hee hee.

We're having a film afternoon. It's rather lovely. Can't be arsed to do anything.

beans37 Fri 26-Apr-13 15:12:45

Sorry, link

Vagolajahooli Fri 26-Apr-13 15:25:58

That looks perfect for the kids fish & lots of dairy products.

Rubes, yes you definitely would not be wanting to use t Internet the trail-gator apart from the narrow bridge and the bromfiets barriers I imagine cycling up hill with him attached and DD in the bike seat would be really difficult. This doesn't help you Rubes but Summer here the parents always cycle beside their kids & have one hand firmly grasping their LO's shoulder. The LO is peddling but by holding their shoulder it kind of pulls/pushes them along. I don't know how safe it is for you to ride side by side there but it helps with the slow cycling child & also saves their energy so they can ride further.

Vagolajahooli Fri 26-Apr-13 15:28:46

Oh & deids the last time I wrote a post grad essay I didn't have my own computer so I used to hand write my assignments & pay a lady to type them up. When I did my degree a couple of years before that all my assignments where handwritten.

Vagolajahooli Fri 26-Apr-13 15:29:12


Vagolajahooli Fri 26-Apr-13 15:34:15

And summer I do love Deidsboy, but I think I defend him because poor my little vagboy gets a bit misunderstood and is labelled & largely ignored by DHs family members because of it. Luckily his teacher is an amazingly patient & talented teacher lady and manages to bring out the real vagboy in school.

beans37 Fri 26-Apr-13 15:44:49

It is great for the kids, but also absolutely yummy and I've served it at dinner parties as well. Strangely, it sometimes splits and doesn't look as nice, but it ALWAYS tastes gorgeous! Don't add salt, just pepper. I am a salt demon, but the undyed smoked haddock is salty enough x

SummerLightning Fri 26-Apr-13 17:23:45

Thanks beans, that is super suggestion as I have some smoked haddock to use up. (DH decided to go to the village fish van and buy 24 quids worth of fish - which was sea bream for 1 meal and "a bit of haddock to go in chowder". The bit of haddock is about 1kg worth I reckon :-) - and we already had some for the chowder anyway!
No chuffing wonder we spend so much on food, he has no sense at all!

SummerLightning Fri 26-Apr-13 17:25:20

Oh and vag DS is a bit short for me to push him also a bit tricky if I am on road and him on pavement. It might work on bike paths but I don't really mind going slow on them. I don't really want him cycling on the road yet except on v quiet roads.

DeidreBarlow Fri 26-Apr-13 18:16:49

I've posted twice today any neither are here...weird!

Anyhow, Summer lovely to hear from you again. Beans recipe recommendation sounds lovely!

And vag I love the way you always stick up for Dudesboy toogrin. despite having never met him you get him'...bless ya!

I have bought a dress for my hen do tomorrow and am shortly off to put some fake tan on my pasty white legs!! I felt a bit bad as I haven't got cash to splash but DH did go to Ibiza for 5 days last year and he did buy himself a whole new wardrobe. So I reckon my £40 TK Maxx special is okay.

McKayz Sun 28-Apr-13 07:32:45


Vag, sorry to hear about your friend sad

Dieds, I hope you had fun last night.

sybilfaulty Sun 28-Apr-13 21:50:45

Where is everyone? Am missing the chat.

Thanks to everyone who sponsored me for my swim. Despite a terrible bout of cramp in the middle I finished in a respectable time and our team raised more than a grand for those fab nurses and the hospices. Hurray!

Arti, how you feeling? Xxxx.

DeidreBarlow Mon 29-Apr-13 10:36:25

Hello, I am still here...only just though. Had a fabulous time on the hen do, just what I needed. A lovely catch up with friends, ridiculous amounts of cocktails and vodka, dancing till the small hours. Although I am way too old for it, I'm still shattered today grin

Well done on the swim Sybs.

So where I'd everyone??

Honsandrevels Mon 29-Apr-13 13:44:19

Just marking my place while I'm having my iron infusion. I've had 8 now and my hb is 8.9 which is still low-ish.. although iron stores are high. Not sure if that's bad or not Dr Google was very unhelpful!

Hope your bp is staying steady arti.

Artichook Mon 29-Apr-13 14:16:03

Oh Hons what is an iron infusion? I did not know you were aneamic. Is it to do with your kidneys? Do you feel very tired?

Congrats on the swim Sybs, v impressive.

I am glad you had a lovely weekend Deids. Was Dudesboy good while you were gone?

I've just seen my consultant to follow up on my pre-eclampsia scare last week. Things are looking better although BP still a little high. The BP added to the fact that a growth scan suggested that the baby is ALREADY 8lbs, means they have booked an induction for 2 weeks today when I will be exactly 39 weeks. EEEK!

I am not sure what I think about the induction. I had an induction with DD1 and it did lead to a cascade of interventions which I do believe that I could have avoided if I had waited until my body was more ready. I think the key is to only agree to the induction if I have a high Bishops Score. I will only agree to this induction on the day if I have a Bishops Score of at least 6, if its less than that I will discuss a possible c-section which they seemed open minded about.

Vagolajahooli Mon 29-Apr-13 16:00:17

Arti that is all a bit scary for you to contemplate I am sure & I do sympathise...but woohoo baby Arti might be here in 2 weeks. How exciting! Just keep that thought in your head, however he makes his way here, is going to be outside you soon!

Hons are you an inpatient?

DB so glad to hear you had a brill time.

Where is PD I wander she still want to do a cheap weekend in Amsterdam?

Sybs your amazing. Sorry haven't sponsored you is it too late? Will go back yo your FB post.

Right I'm in the midst of baking ginger bread crowns & honey jumbles. We havea toonswisseling tomorrow (dutch for throne change, coronation) & Queens day (the last of 123 years of them) so we are baking like crazy. One of the traditions of Queens day is that street market rules don't apply so effectively yhe whole countries street can be used to sell whatever tat ya fancy. So we are baking this stuff to sell at a little stall we are doing with our friends & their kids. I could use the occasion to attempt to get rid of some crap but last year we took it all down the street and sold one Thomas the tank engine so this year we are going for just yummies.

Oh and I'm celebrating this lovely sunny afternoon with a G&T anyone care to join me.

Oh and

Honsandrevels Mon 29-Apr-13 16:23:18

Sorry if I worried you arti and vag! No I'm not staying in, I've been having iron via iv as an outpatient. I've been anemic for ages but they're not sure why really. The infusions were meant to pep me up but it hasn't really done the trick.

Arti I had a scan by a consultant with dd1 who estimated her at well over 8lb and she was 6lb 13. I'm not sure they are always very reliable! Are you being closely monitored with your bp etc?

Artichook Mon 29-Apr-13 16:36:30

Hons you are totally right that growth scans can be way off. However, as DD1 was 9lbs 4oz at 38 weeks and DD2 was 10lbs 2oz at 41 weeks, I sort of expect they are right. Huge babies do unfortunately run in DH's genes. His father was the heaviest baby ever recorded to be born in Wales in the 1940s and his sister had a 12+lber. Still, I probably would not agree to an induction on size alone, the BP is also a factor. They are monitoring it closely (which is in itself a pain as I have to go to the hospital every few days) but I get scared by high BP as my father died of a sudden cerebral bleed bought on by high BP when he was only two years older than me.

I'm sorry your infusions aren't working. Are there other options to give your iron a boost?

Veg enjoy your G&T. I meant to say the other day that at my uni 70% was the cut off for a first class mark so 69% was pretty damn good. I think that is true at all English universities. Where are you studying again?

DeidreBarlow Mon 29-Apr-13 19:52:42

Hons sorry about the iron levels, can they do anything else if this doesn't work?

Blimey arti those are some big babiesgrin. Lets hope your BP behaves itself. And thanks for asking after Dudesboy he was as good as gold this weekend. But we'll see how he gets on at ore school this week

beans37 Mon 29-Apr-13 20:45:37


In case of recipe need.

Arti - wahooooo! Nipper 3 will soon be here. Wow, those are some big babies. And you're so slim!

beans37 Mon 29-Apr-13 20:46:24

Oh, that didn't work, sorry. this

Vagolajahooli Tue 30-Apr-13 10:16:53

Troonwisseling day here in NL so we are off out to join the festivities. Then we are off on jolly days tomorrow hooray.

Artichook Tue 30-Apr-13 11:12:24

Enjoy your day Veggie. Where are you off to tomorrow?

I'm bored. This pregnancy has taken its toll on my feet. i think my arches are collapsing and I have really sore balls of my feet, so I can hardly walk. I wanted to use these few weeks to be around the DD's school a little more, bond with the parents etc. But I can't walk the 20 min walk it takes to get there so the nanny is doing it all. I need to tidy and sort stuff and I am doing a bit of that but I want more FUN in my last weeks of freedom!

beans37 Tue 30-Apr-13 14:16:59

DD2 got into the nursery of choice, despite there being a massive shortage of spaces! Yay! I'm so relieved. Have been v fretful. Will have to be careful as one friend's little girl didn't get in, and she's gutted. God, it's terrifying!

Arti, poor you. How horrible... Just use the two weeks to really relax and let people look after you xx

Honsandrevels Tue 30-Apr-13 14:36:31

I know what you mean arti. I wished I was flushed with energy and able to dash about at the start of my mat leave but sadly late pregnancy is exhausting! Enjoy your garden furniture and a nice sit down. Maybe plan some trips or holidays, fun stuff to look forward to.

Hurray beans that's good news.

Vag Enjoy the celebrations!

Artichook Tue 30-Apr-13 15:12:44

Great news about the nursery Beans. Is that the one attached to the school that DD1 got into? When is your 20 week scan? Will you find out the gender?

Can I have a little moan about our nanny? She is remaining fulltime until the end of May which we did so we would have cover while I was heavily pregnant and in hospital etc but she is driving me a little mad. First, now that I am home I can see she often ignores things I've asked her to do, like not give the girls sweets. Secondly, she keeps going out without her keys and ringing the doorbell when she returns which has happened 3 times today and means I have to trog up and down the stairs over and over. To be fair I sometimes do this too but not over and over in one day to a heavily pregnant woman. Thirdly, DD2 just pooed her pants while they were in the park, the nanny bought her back for an emergency change and let DD2 ring the doorbell but then hung back with another nanny as I answered and let DD2 in and then DD2 was upset and needed cleaning up but the nanny was lingering behind so I ended up spending 10 minutes changing and cleaning DD2 and washing poo out of pants when I am paying £11 an hour for fulltime bloody childcare. Fourthly, she told the girls I am being induced on the 13th and I was not going to tell them that (to be fair I had not asked her to keep in secret but surely she would know now to tell them something important like that that they clearly did not know). I am not sure I want to share my space for another month. Of course I have to though because that is her notice period and I don't want to end on a sour note anyway. The kids really love her. Sigh.

I think I need to get out.

JamInMyWellies Tue 30-Apr-13 20:25:16

Super news beans.

Happy abdication day Vag.

Arti feet up and as am sure you are aware your nanny is taking the piss.

DH has found the house of our dreams now can we please win the lottery to be able to buy it. property porn

Vagolajahooli Tue 30-Apr-13 22:29:15

Yay Beans brilliant news.

Arti when I was up duffed with ds2 the 15 minute walk into town used to take 40 minutes & I usually had to catch a cab home as I was too tired. The poor cabbies would wait ages in the taxi line at the rank in town and one would end up with me who took all of 5 mins to drop home. Not much of a fare for them.

Arti it does sound like your nanny is taking the p, I think in general most of it isn't too bad but not prioritising dD2 when she needed changing is pretty bad. What did she say when she finally came in? And the sweets thing is not good.

Had a lovely day, the dutch regal themed gingerbread & honey jumbles went like hotcakes, the boys were perfect little salesmen. We also got some good bargains on little bits of tat and some books for ds1 to read. Ds1 also bought a metal detector. He is so excited about taking it to the beach. My little geek, gotta love him.

We are off to Paris tomorrow afternoon, DH has a conference down there until Saturday so the boys and I are going hit one of our favorite towns and enjoy then on Saturday we are going to drive further south to Clermont-Ferrand about an hour and a half west of Lyon. Hoping we are going far enough south to get some warmer weather.

McKayz Wed 01-May-13 10:20:20

I used to get the bus home from town when PG with DD. Took about 2 mins and cost £1. I sometimes wish I could get away with it now.

Beans that is great news about nursery.

Artichook Wed 01-May-13 13:27:35

Errr, TMI but some clear water just ran down my leg. Not much but it can't have been wee so what the hell was it? If it was waters wouldn't it have been more and kept going????? V v v odd.

JamInMyWellies Wed 01-May-13 13:47:29

ooh exciting. Could it be fore waters???

Artichook Wed 01-May-13 13:50:35

I have no idea Jam. Nothing more has appeared but baby is going mental.

JamInMyWellies Wed 01-May-13 13:53:59

Give your midwife a ring?

DeidreBarlow Wed 01-May-13 14:02:43

Agree with Jam phone MW or maternity unit?? Hope all is okay x

Artichook Wed 01-May-13 14:06:45

Phoned maternity unit who were less than overwhelmed as it was only a tiny bit. Hmmmm.

Ill never forget your great MN water breaking moment Jam.

May have to go and buy a Magnum to distract myself.

Artichook Wed 01-May-13 14:07:33

Sorry I meant to type Deids not Jam. Was too busy thinking of Magnum!

beans37 Wed 01-May-13 16:01:36

Arti, I'd go into the maternity unit. That happened with me with DD1 and it was my waters and they didn't realise!

DeidreBarlow Wed 01-May-13 16:18:26

Hmm, can you get to the Maternity unit & get them to check you over? I've no idea about waters breaking as both of mine went fully both times & pre any sort of contractions...and yes one of them whilst on here blushgrin

2 days at pre school & 2 days of Dudesboy being good. Although yesterday he was a bit off colour so more sedated than well behaved probably!

McKayz Wed 01-May-13 16:18:43

Arti, any more? If it is your waters they usually deliver within 48 hours so I'd get checked out.

ShadyLadyT Wed 01-May-13 16:32:20

Hello lovely ladies, I did a large post last night around the time Vag did hers, but I lost the lot and then was too tired to type it all again sad

Woo, Arti! I don't know about breaking waters but it sounds exciting! Maybe you are now in labour!

I don't think I will be back tonight to do my post all over again because I have Italian and I need to cram my homework. But I will be back before the end of the week.

I was talking about you ladies this morning and how you totally got me through the first few years of parenthood, stranded in that bloody village! You brilliant lot. Good luck Arti.

Artichook Wed 01-May-13 16:48:07

Nothing exciting happening at all ladies. Sorry! I took DD2 for an ice cream in the park as I thought that would tempt fate and get things moving if it was my waters but nothing. I have book club tonight and we're going to my fav pub so I really don't want to go into the hospital. If it was waters it was the tiniest bit and must have resealed right????

beans37 Wed 01-May-13 17:12:20

Well, we'll all be waiting with bated breath!

I have a medical question... DD2 has a temperature of 40. No other symptoms, just lethargic and hot hot hot. She's gone to sleep. Any tips? Should I be GPing her?

DeidreBarlow Wed 01-May-13 17:25:03

Beans DS was exactly the same yesterday! I picked him up from pre school he was white as a sheet and said he wanted a rest. Took his temp it was 39, gave him some Calpol, he went to bed and woke this morning right as rain confused

Keep checking & if it doesn't go down then I'd try the GP

beans37 Wed 01-May-13 17:29:01

Thanks, Deids. I noticed she had one last night too, but she seemed fine this morning, but been v clingy post Playgroup and watched a lot of telly. Only thought to check her temp about half an hour ago. I'm crap!

beans37 Wed 01-May-13 17:29:40

She's tucked up in bed now out for the count and calpol-ed up to the eyeballs!

ZuleikaJambiere Wed 01-May-13 17:39:18

I started a post ages ago, full of commiserations to Rubes on the school worries and Deids on the DudesBoy worries - but thankfully both are now sorted

Hope all is ok Arti? How exciting if your boy is on the way!

ZuleikaJambiere Wed 01-May-13 20:09:07

I've remembered, I was gong to say something to Spot about T's bad dreams. Has he had anymore? When DD was having night terrors I did a lot of reading about it - they can't remember terrors but can remember nightmares (occur in different phases of sleep apparently), so T's sound like nightmares, poor boy. One of the things the HV suggested we try for E was to try to get her to process her thoughts a bit before going to sleep - she thought it might work because dreams are supposed to be a way of processing of all of the info in our brain, and children are less able to do this during the day because they can't communicate as well and make sense of things they've seen and heard. So every night, before E's story we'd have a little chat about what had made her happy and what had made her sad that day, and could we do anything about any of those things. The HV did say she was no expert, but it was just an idea she thought was worth trying. E's terrors did lessen as we did this, so it could have worked, or it could have been a phase. But if something (like school, maybe) is praying on T's mind, then maybe it's worth a try.

Hi ZJ, thanks v much for the advice, it does sound like nightmares he was having, and he was v v strung out and exhausted after his day so no time for usual pre-bed chat. We do normally do that kind of talking in the bath and while getting ready for bed, but didn't that night (and he'd had the "trapped in the car" moment), so maybe that was part of it too.

BEans, my two quite often have 40 degree temps that last whole weeks, (go down eventually with Calpol and Ibuprofen, then come back again) - but it depends how they are in themselves. I think if she's unresponsive or looks a bit "off" or unlike herself it's worth a call to the GP, but kids seem to be able to spike temps and still be strangely ok.

Arti I love that you don't want to go into labour cos it's book club. That's commitment! It does sound like something though.

Well, I'm applying for that boring job I mentioned, and just had a call today from the employer I came second for in an interview a few months back (still with me?) saying they're opening up another two positions and would I like to apply?

So if either one comes off (preferably the latter as it's 10K more than the first!) I could find myself in f/t employment again. It's a very weird thought as I've been self-employed for 5 years and very used to being my own boss, but I guess right now I need to suck it up and get earning!

beans37 Wed 01-May-13 20:35:13

Well done Spot. That's great! DD2 rallied for a story and has only just gone back to sleep.

You know how even one asparagus can make your wee smell? I've just eaten about 25 of them! Lucky DH.

ZuleikaJambiere Wed 01-May-13 20:42:15

envy Of the asparagus - is it British? Ours still isn't ready, a full month late now and I'm starting to feel a bit loopy from being deprived of it. I keep drooling over recipes like someone on a diet!

Good luck with the job applications Spot, that's great you've been asked to apply

beans37 Wed 01-May-13 21:04:17

Yes, it was British. Just had it with salt and melted butter. Yummers.

ZuleikaJambiere Wed 01-May-13 21:39:39

envyenvyenvy The best way, drool

beans37 Wed 01-May-13 22:01:04

Mmmmm. Although am still hungry! No surprises there, I am a hog.

SummerLightning Wed 01-May-13 22:29:21

hello my dears,
Beans I made your recipe (haddock one), and it was YUMMERS. And my mashed potato wasn't even lumpy. My friends even liked it. They are quite rude friends too so they would say if they didn't (I burnt a curry for them once and it was fairly inedible and they still take the piss)
arti hope it's nothing sounds like nothing and you get to enjoy bookclub! your nanny does sound like she is taking the piss somewhat. Can you kind of make yourself unavailable, etc, so she can't impose on you?
spot that second reapplying job sounds promising! The lower paid one less so but still promising that things are coming up.

Not one for Fbook.
This morning, T - "I'm twisting my willy to make it happy".

Artichook Thu 02-May-13 09:00:43

Ha ha ha Spot. I suppose its important that he knows how to keep his bits happy!

Loving the Asparagus chat. I like mine with a light vinigrette. I have a lovely salmon summer tray bake recipe that relies on asparagus and the lack of asparagus thus far has ruined various attempts at that recipe. I might change back to an asparagus related name like I had last year.

How is DD today Beans? Mine also through 40 degree temps and then bounce back. Children are odd.

I'm off for lunch and some light shopping with an old friend today. We are meeting on the other side of town but i think its fine as no more water has leaked. Book Club was great last night, helped by this year's first Pimms, so I am pleased with the baby for staying put.

Vagolajahooli Thu 02-May-13 17:21:38

Hello ladies just a quick one to say Arti my hind waters broke with DS1 & while it wasnt a huge gush it was definitely obvious that something was going on as it was a pretty constant dribble so if it hasn't kept going I think you're ok. I hate to break it to you but I think it may have been a little wee. At this stage everything is so squeezed & stretched that it will slip out at the slightest skip & unbeknownst to you even knowing you had any in there.

Just popping on quickly as the boys are happily playing with some dutch kids in the little cottage next door (I know being multilingual helps with career prospects in the future but to be honest for me I just love that they can play with a wider groupof kids on holiday).

Arti I love the idea of seasonal mn names for you.

Spot, if he works on his technique he'll have perfected by his teens for sure.

Paris is awesome as always the boys & I hired bikes today & went for a long ride in a big park. But I'm a bit nervy as my friend is having her mastectomy today her hubby texted me this morning to let me know she got a message I sent her and said he would text when she is out. So far I've not heard anything. White Light & prayers would be appreciated.

Vagolajahooli Thu 02-May-13 17:23:05

Oh & beans how is the temp? Ds2 is the same & a bit weepy with it. I want to take them up the old tour eiffel tomorrow so hope he is better.

Honsandrevels Thu 02-May-13 19:37:44

White light from here Vag.

Arti Shouldn't you get checked on case it was waters? I thought they induce after so many hours? Disclaimer: know nothing about natural childbirth.

Oh and re the nanny. Take yourself off for naps and just be generally be unavailable. The poo thing would make me really cross. Dd2 sounded so upset and she should have been her priority.

JamInMyWellies Fri 03-May-13 08:12:12

Vag did you hear from your friend. White light for you. x

Artichook Fri 03-May-13 08:34:22

Yes, white light to your friend Veggie.

I did get checked out in the end yesterday. No sign of waters having leaked but I know it wasn't wee as (a) I had just gone 3 mins before, (b) it didn't smell like wee (c) it came out differently. Anyway enough about that. I'm loving this weather. The girls school is closed today so we are going to hang out at home. It's only 8.30am and they've already been in the garden for 40 mins making camps and plotting.

Indith Fri 03-May-13 08:41:53

Mmmmm asparagus.

Vag I'm thinkig positive thoughts for you.

Only a month to go until placement! Argh! A bunch of us booked a practice room yesterday and mahandled each other to go through our clinical skills. Crazy crazy workload, need to catch up. Today and this weekend I am going to be productive. I am. Really.

Love you all, sorry I am failing at keeping up with anything. I am also failing at keepig up with anything in real life so don't be offended grin.

ZuleikaJambiere Fri 03-May-13 08:44:11

I'm pleased to hear you we're checked Arti and all is fine, relax and enjoy the lovely bank holiday

Hope your friend is ok Vaj

T's willy talk made me glad I have girls, then I remembered that DD1 likes to put her fingers up her fanjo and stretch it open and invite DH and I to have a good look. Classy girl

ZuleikaJambiere Fri 03-May-13 08:47:55

Crossed with Indith, placement is exciting - will you be on the community MW side of things or delivery? I had a student at both of my births and I felt very special being able to share it with them, as they were so grateful and moved by my new girls. DD2 was that student's first birth, she did a great job of sieving the pool for me!

Rubena Fri 03-May-13 17:48:22

Hello sorry asked about cycling with kids and then buggered off. It's been a stressful week with dh gone half of it doing final ever exams up north. The results which came today were very good. He's on call tonight so can't even celebrate, but the weekend will be a good one and such a relief for all that there's no more of this kind of stress at least!

SL thanks for reassurance I'm not alone. Have decided its easiest just to take them to the park in the car for now. Just until he's a bit older. He actually had a spectacular fall only hours after my post and I thought he'd be put off for awhile, but a lightning Mcqueen plaster has magical powers you know.
Beans that salmon is similar to what I cook a LOT But I was interested in the timings as I always cook salmon for about 30 min at about 180C so tried that recipe for 11 min at 210 and it was still cold in the middle? I'm sure I'm doing something wrong. I do cocoon it in foil so perhaps that's it? Or my ovens shagged which I've thought before.
Deids I'm glad your hen do was fun. And your shopping trip a success! I have a soft spot for dudesboy too as I think nursery staff are very quick to label a kid the "bad kid" when it might be just a week of bad sleep, they're a bit naughty, and then they're screwed from then on.
Spot well done on the job situ. I think it all sounds v positive. We need to do that wine meet soon with this lovely weather and potential garden time before you become a 9-5er! Glad ds is having fun with his boy bits. Ds told me the other day he was "stoping his getting big because its ridiculous when it does that" as he was doing a number 2. I suspect he will change his opinion when he's older.
Arti. All very exciting, and then dull. C'mon I want some baby Arti news! Also love the book club dedication. Your nanny needs to wind her neck in and stop taking the piss. I'd be livid, but still don't know how you cope with a nanny. That said you're all probably thinking I'm nuts thinking that! I'm just stubborn and weird with other people doing jobs like that for me as I always think they wouldn't do what I really wanted. I guess I just don't trust people enough! Or a control freak when it comes to the kids. I suspect a bit of both.
ZJ. I actually threw up a little bit in my mouth when I read that! Now that I've finished eating, it is quite funny and not any worse than ds talking about his tally whacker.
Lady haven't forgotten to get back to you with my Costco day and lunch meet up. You sound ultra busy but happy.
Vag hope your friend is ok and you are having a worry free French jaunt.
Right I suspect you will all be AWOL for the long weekend if this weather keeps up! Must get on with kiddie meltdown hour.

Rubena Fri 03-May-13 17:49:35

Crikey I meant 20 min for the salmon. Sometimes 18 but not 30!!

McKayz Fri 03-May-13 17:52:21

Can anyone help with this?

DS2 is now terrified of loads of things. Poor liitle man sad

sybilfaulty Sat 04-May-13 18:53:44

Sorry Kayz, I've only had this sort of trouble with dd1 and she's 8 so slightly easier to reason things with. I agree that disciplining him for being afraid is bonkers. Poor you. Hope it gets sorted soon xxx

McKayz Sat 04-May-13 19:49:27

Thanks Sybs. I can't ignore him or discipline him while he so obviously scared. xx

sybilfaulty Sat 04-May-13 22:36:27

Love to you XXX

sybilfaulty Sun 05-May-13 10:11:53

where is everyone? Echo..ooo..ooo..oooo..ooo....

McKayz Sun 05-May-13 10:57:57

I'm in Middlesbrough. My step-dad is doing a bungee jump of the Transporter Bridge. My step-brother got him it as an Xmas present. The crazy loon!!!

beans37 Sun 05-May-13 16:34:20

Bonjour! Am in Lyon, having a lovely time. Snoozing and eating loads. Probably illegal food like dried ham, but it's so gooooood!

Kayz, that's tough. Not sure what to suggest. Probably talking it through. I know with dogs you're not meant to comfort them too much when they're nervous of something as it reinforces their fear, but it's not really the same!

Arti, where's your baby news???

I've been doing loads of walking here and just suddenly found it uncomfortable towards the end of our pottering today and actually felt preggers. Got 20 week scan on Weds, unbelievably. Can now feel it on outside of body when the baby wiggles. Just.

DD2's temperature still there, so am missing them pretty keenly, but DH reassures me they are fine. Feeling a bit guilty for not being there at the mo, but it is so nice catching up on my sleep. Friday night I did 10.5hrs straight and had a 2hr snooze yesterday afternoon too! Just had an hour now too and off for a Chinese meal tonight. Lovely!

Right, must go and natter to my friend!


EffiePerine Sun 05-May-13 22:33:08

Not much to say but marking my place!

Living on the edge: doing a 250 miles round trip in a 1975 Triumph with a failing clutch. Thank God there are few hills in Essex.

Any news from Arti?

Honsandrevels Sun 05-May-13 22:47:49

Hello all,

I was just checking in to see if arti has given us a bank holiday arrival.

Kayz We've not had any major phobias but if dd1 sees a spider she gets frightened. I try and keep it breezy, have a hug and then explain spiders don't hurt us, they are more likely to be scared of us etc. Dd2 is very scared of unexplained noises e.g. washing machines etc.

I think fears need to be taken seriously and not dismissed as silly, yet balance it with getting down to their level and talking through how there isn't anything to be scared of really.

Artichook Tue 07-May-13 12:55:10

Hi All

No big news here. I felt awful yesterday, really dizzy and odd, but more normal today and no signs of actual labour. Not even a show. I'm having a sweep tomorrow followed immediately by brunch with friends at a lovely place in town then a walk round the Royal Academy. If the sweep gets things going it could be quite a public labour, I am totally sure it won't do a thing though. I am only 38+2 (baby now measuring 9lbs, arrrgghhhh).

Kayz - I have no real experience of phobias in children except that DD1 was very scared of dogs aged 3 and 4. We tried to keep exposing her but very gently and with lots of reassurance. She loves dogs now so I think it was a phase.

Effie - Do you own a 1975 Triumph??? That is so great. Is it your main car?

Beans - I am so glad that France was fun. Good luck for the 20 week scan this week. Will you find out the gender.

Rubes - Huge CONGRATULATIONS to your DH on his exam results. It must be such a relief that he can relax now. Does it make your possible move any more certain?

Right, off to package loads of Ebay parcels and waddle to the Post Office.

Vagolajahooli Tue 07-May-13 14:32:40

Hello over there on Lyon Beans, I'm just across the way in Royat. Lovely here a little cloudy today but still warm enough to get around in shorts & T's. The boys have been swimming in the pool the last few days & loving it. I think when we get home (to Australia) we need to get a pool. We have a cute little cottage here at a campsite there is almost no one around and we can walk straight into the bush at the back. The boys & I went for a little bush walk this morning lots of climbing rocks & into caves & scratched legs. Lots of fun. Poor DH is a bit unwell with a cold, always happens. We also did our usual French holiday tradition of visiting a decathlon. Bought Rollerblades for the boys, snorkeling gear and one of those poles with a string & tennis ball attached. The boys are hooked.

Right must choof I've got the washing on & must go pop it in the dryer. Sorry for the lack of personals.

Vagolajahooli Tue 07-May-13 14:34:55

Oh Effie must add I always wanted a triumph my dad had one of their motorbikes.

And hooray for exam results Rubs, that must be a weight off. Good on him after all that hard slog. I've said it before, doctors have a hard life, despite the public thinking its all golf courses and high wages.

DeidreBarlow Tue 07-May-13 19:49:02

Just popping on quickly, hope your all enjoying this gorgeous sunshine. It certainly makes for a better mood!!

I've applied for a FT jobshock. Doing similar to what I am now but a really good salary for a FT week, which is only 36 hrs. I really fancy it...bet I don't even get an interviewgrin

The Apprentice tonight. Who's watching??

beans37 Tue 07-May-13 22:16:04

Hi all. Got back from France yesterday, and it was so lovely. However, DD2 still really unwell. In fact, given she's been asleep since 4.15, I'll be signing off shortly. Took her to nurse today who said if she's not better by Friday then she will give her antibiotics. She's to be off childcare and all activities all week, so just rest and lots of water. She's not eating anything either. Had to sleep with her last night and am v tired and worried. She'll be coming to the scan with us tomorrow!

I must away to sleep.

Night night all. DB let us know how job goes.

Arti, sweep sounds promising... Were you late or early with girls?

Rubes, yay for DH!


Rubena Wed 08-May-13 08:09:04

Thanks all re dh. Yeah massive relief it went so well. Long boozy weekend here then vomiting child all day on wedding anniversary. How was tours Summer? Arti its mainly that he can now continue the extra work he had to cut down on for study. Ill be back helping him and if we can afford buying this house we will do some work to it, stay a couple of years here then sell to move closer to where he works. No baby? Yet?

Kayz hope he just grows out of it. Ds was scared of bubble bath for ages. Dh was in Middlesborough too.

Deids I didn't know Apprentice was starting until half way thru! So I plus oned last nights and am on board from now grin good luck with the job!

Beans France sounded nice. Same Vag. Hope dd is better soon.

I see the usual weather has resumedhmm I get it now why Brits talk about weather so much. You kind of get obsessed with when the sun will come out. Took it for granted back home. Kids were actually in paddling pool at weekend! Madness. It was freezing. I cannot wait for Spain.wine grin☀��

Rubena Wed 08-May-13 08:38:09

"yours Summer (wedding anniversary)" not "tours"

Rubena Wed 08-May-13 08:45:37

Also Summer if you're there. Which Islabike did you get ds? We are thinking of upgrading the heavy arsed Halfords job for an Islabike the size / age recommendations are slightly different to other bike age / size recommendations. We were thinking the CNOC16 ? But the Beinn20 small says suitable from 5 years which to me sounds far too big?!

Rubena Wed 08-May-13 08:47:59

Or maybe the 14? Which he has now. No idea how much they grow!

beans37 Wed 08-May-13 09:13:10

Morning all. Sadly DD1 won't even sit on her bike, even with stabilisers. He's total meltdown.

Off for scan in a min. DH taken DD1 to school and DD2 coming to scan as still not right, despite 14.5 hrs sleep!!

I haven't felt the baby move for a v long time. Usually notice subconsciously with the girls, then last night I realised I hadn't noticed at all, but wasn't sure how long for. And still haven't felt it since. Sure all will be well, but keep your fingers crossed for me today!

Big love xx

Rubena Wed 08-May-13 09:22:43

Good luck today Beans! I'm sure all is fine and well. Probably just all that lovely food in France made baby tight for wriggling! Are you finding out the sex??? Please say yes grin
Hope DD feels better soon, I bet she'll perk up at the scan. She's probably faking it now so she can go smile DS was vomiting non stop and high temp then all over and back on his bike in about 8 hours. Twas very odd.

Artichook Wed 08-May-13 11:00:57

Good luck Beans!

Rubes, we got the smallest peddle Isla Bike for DD2 and now as an average height 6 year old shed too tall for it so we are about to order the next one up, but having seen other kids with that one I know it would have been way too big for her age 4. I love Isla bikes, so light and nifty.

Just had a sweep. I'm 2cm dilated but baby not v engaged and cervix thick so I'm not hopeful of results. The tough Jsmacian midwife didn't half go for it though, I'd forgotten how painful it can be.

beans37 Wed 08-May-13 11:40:59

Hello! Luckily all was well and nipper was v active. Hurrah! We weren't finding out the sex which was lucky as apparently it was lying on its front anyway, so no view!

So relieved all ok. Was nervous!

Wow, Arti, 2cm. Does that mean imminent arrival of DS??? X

Rubena Wed 08-May-13 11:50:48

Great news beans. But aww I hate surprises! grin

Arti isn't the smallest Islabike a 12 inch? Ds has 14 now. So will either get that size again or go 16.

Ds has worms. I've hightailed it to the chemist and now (sorry Lady) have come to Costco as I left the dogs wormer here last visit and I'm a bit paranoid! Doesn't mean we won't catch up soon - will just have more time wink

JamInMyWellies Wed 08-May-13 11:59:17

Great news Beans.

Arti that means it could be any day now doesnt it?

My dog has just rolled in and eaten fresh horse poo. <sigh>

McKayz Wed 08-May-13 12:01:43

That's great news Beans.

My brothers fiancée has dumped him by a fuckin letter today. How could anyone do that? sad

DeidreBarlow Wed 08-May-13 12:38:47

Yay beans wonderful newssmile

Arti this is very exciting...I reckon we will have new thread baby by the weekend!!

Rubes DS's bike is a 12" but he's a quite a tall boy and its looking a bit small for him. But he's not a fan so it's in mint condition. Grim on the worms, hope DS is ok

Right must each lunch am famished!! Trying to shed a few pounds in preparation for the summer, I'm bored already!

beans37 Wed 08-May-13 13:12:55

Jam! Was just thinking about you and thinking you'd been a bit quiet... How are you doing? All ok?

Kayz, that's rough. Did she say why? Better now than after the wedding, I guess, but still shoddy. How's DS and his fears?

McKayz Wed 08-May-13 13:23:04

She doesn't feel the same anymore. She bloody wrote 'its not you, it's me'

JamInMyWellies Wed 08-May-13 15:30:46

Beans hi!. Feel completely ok no morning sickness or tiredness or anything so am totally panicking that its another MMC. The only thing giving me hope that all is ok is the fact that my belly is enormous!. My DSIS is 17wks and b the end of the day my belly is bigger than hers and I am only coming up to 8wks. shock

beans37 Wed 08-May-13 16:06:19

Is it her first, Jam?
I've got a friend who is also on her third and 3 weeks ahead of me and she isn't into her maternity jeans yet. V depressing. I have been since week 11!!!!

ShadyLadyT Wed 08-May-13 16:28:44

Lovely ladies

It's Wednesday again and I need to do my Italian homework again so no time for a catch up until tomorrow, but just wanted to wave and say good luck to Arti - so exciting - and a hurrah for Beans for the scan (do you have any guesses what the sex may be? I just mean in terms of hunches) and Jam - you were a right slinky dinky before and you will be again so don't worry about the belly.

Rubes - past about the 20th May good for me for Reading, unless that's half term week when I may well be at Mum's, but before the 15th June when we are going to stay at a friend's villa in Spain he has just bought. Whoop.

Kayz, that is such a shame.

Aaaaarrrgh, want to have a proper catch up but I can't because if I haven't learned my Italian I end up sounding like a total dork and it's hideous. Have lots i wanted to say to various people.

Usual array of egomanaic weirdos on The Apprentice, I see!

Vagolajahooli Wed 08-May-13 16:37:52

Helloooo I'm just working up the courage to go in the pool. The boys are all in there and it is warm but I'll freeze when I get out.

Arti 2cm sounds promising.

Kayz that sucks.

Jam I was huge with ds2.

So dh has suddenly confided that he quite likes the idea of a third. Blimey Charlie, he's about two years too late. But now he's got me thinking. But I think I'm too old and ds2 would be 5. It's all a bit too late I think.

beans37 Wed 08-May-13 16:40:25

Not too late, Vag! I'm 5 years younger than my next sibling and I love the age gap and always have,,, and am v close to my sister too. Do it, do it!

McKayz Wed 08-May-13 16:41:27

Do it Vag!!!! DH is 13 years younger than his brother!! 5 years is nowt!!!

Rubena Wed 08-May-13 17:16:20

I only just saw the first line of all the new posts, and Vag was working up the courage to go in the pool, and Kayz said "do it do it" then to my excitement I read it properly in full!
Wow how exciting Vag! I'd be a nervous wreck with the age thing too as I was totally stressed being pregnant with dd, and not really old (not that you're / I'm old now, it's just you know.... I'm a worrier!) so I totally get that, but it can be done, and usually goes off without a hitch, and easily... just ask Lady! How exciting! I'd slightly want to kill your dh too with just deciding to swing around now.... bloody men.
So what's the likelihood of this new situation going ahead? Crikey you lot doing the 3 thing are brave!

Lady, yes def must get a plan together - or even lock in that plan to get Spot over and kidnap Deids and stick the Dude fam on the train! Ive got a buggered up Standby month for June, so could be messy anyway, it's a once a year thing, but only my little couple of overnights this month. Then July we are utterly chokkas on the calendar.
Where are you going in Spain? I CANNOT wait for our trip (we never go on short close to home trips with no jetlag!!!) and I suspect we will make it an annual thing after this trip. Just need to get dd into a drown proof suit as there is a pool just steps from our accom, (and she thinks she's a good swimmer hmm) and then start stock piling the pink Bolly, and the diet goes without saying! grin

Well I have wormed myself, dd, ds and the dog grin just waiting for dh to get home and he will be greeted with a syringe of Worm medicine.

I started to honey roast some parsnips as I had an abundance, then realised I'm low on honey - idiot.

Kayz, sorry bout your brother's news. Crikey that's tough. As Beans said, good she found out now.

JamInMyWellies Wed 08-May-13 17:18:03

Do it Vag this one will be 5yrs younger than DS2.

Indith Wed 08-May-13 17:20:44

5 years is nothing. ds1's best mate's little brother is the same age as my ds2.

Rubena Wed 08-May-13 17:21:48

Lady, I meant to say, I'm off to San Fran at the weekend, then have an ultra short (go one day back the next) New York the following week, but that's it for May so perhaps towards the end as I'm free after the 21st and just tentatively, no plans on 28th/29th. 30th I have the half day pre-school thing which messes up the day, or the Fri's I have dd all day but got to be back by 4pm to get ds

McKayz Wed 08-May-13 17:23:45

Rubes, Vag and all you other jet setters. I am thinking of trying to save for a trip to San Fran or New York for DH's 30th. I've been to NYC and it's amazing but San Fran looks great too.

Which do I go for and where are the best places to stay that won't cost a fortune?

DeidreBarlow Wed 08-May-13 17:57:12

Blimey vag, how exciting!! I don't think your too old at all. Four years between me & my sis and its nothing. Really.

Jam I was in mat clothes at 10 wks with DS. And my boobs were ginormicagrin I love all these 3rd babies. I was always confident that 2 was enough for me. Although Dh would have liked a third. Tough now anyway he's been snippedgrin

Kayz. Sorry to hear about your brothersad. At least she's done it now and not after the wedding. Not that if makes him feel any better though.

Apprentice last night was full of even more loons than usual. I really can't believe Lord Shuggs would want to be in business with any of them! It's the X Factor of the business world!!

Artichook Wed 08-May-13 18:06:41

Oh my gosh Veg!!!! What a turnaround by your DH. I remember when you were broody and he wouldn't entertain the idea. A five year age gap is rather civilised IMO. I know some adult siblings with huge age gaps and they tend to be quite close as they never had the same rivalry. It's only 9 months more than the age gap I will have.

Fab news about the scan Beans. We're the girls surprises too?

Kayz, I used to live in SF, its lovely BUT it's an expensive 11 hour flight do only with it for a break of at least 10 days IMO. Also jet lag is bad with 8 hour time difference. NY is much more suited to a short break but accommodation is all pretty pricey.

I'm having pinky something since the sweep. Not sure it's a show or waters but its a bit yuk. And I have lower belly ache but not contractions, more constant. I think it's all normal discomfort from the sweep and hope it goes away overnight as I'm exhausted and need to finish S. 3 of Breaking Bad before baby comes.

Rubena Wed 08-May-13 18:36:46

Arti, I'm so excited for you. Am checking MN like a good book that's hard to put down! Vaogola come back - we need more info! grin
Vag, I'm equally excited about your news! grin

Kayz, as Arti said both are lovely cities, but also pricey, and SF being a bit further too. I also lived in SF for several years and I think Jam's got a sister there? I'd help you out with flights but can only either take you with me on a trip which is really hard to orchestrate, (again ask Lady) or would be far too short for your get away! grin or failing that can only get you confirmed "mates rates" but my bil just looked into that and went with another airline as it only brings the price down to still a bit above what you can get with an on line deal.
I went to NY for my 30th (many moons ago -sigh-) and it was affordable but we did it proper uni student style - again not so romantic for DH's 30th if you want it to be special. When's his bday by the way?

I've just gone proper postal at the dc's. Just ignoring everything I asked them to do re tidying up the utter shambles they made upstairs before dinner. I've confiscated about 20 cars cars, plus Peppa Pig, put them in the bath, showered them and washed their hair which they hate, and now they've listened, and are begging me to close my eyes and come up to see their spotless rooms hmm better go then....

McKayz Wed 08-May-13 18:53:35

It's not until 2015 but I'm trying to get ideas now so I can start saving. He'd love an old mini to do up so that's another idea too.

JamInMyWellies Wed 08-May-13 19:50:01

Ooh Arti I can give you a run down on the rest of S3 of BB I am halfway through S4. Then you can concentrate on birthing DS grin

Honsandrevels Wed 08-May-13 20:19:35

Oooh exciting vag! That age gap is nothing. Really normal, nothing out of the ordinary! Our friend has siblings 19 and 23 years older. His mum thought she was going through 'the change'. He has a great relationship with his siblings.

Arti Sounds promising!

sybilfaulty Wed 08-May-13 20:21:43

Oh Vag, how lovely, another thread baby possibility. I am done with my 3 now but love the idea of new babies around. Lots of reception mums in T's year were pregnant with their next one and I don't think you are too old. I was 39 1/4 when I had M and it was no harder bodywise, although 3 under 4 was a bit tough. If yours are bigger they can help properly and would dote on their wee sibling. I'd say go for it if the only thing stopping you is age!

sybilfaulty Wed 08-May-13 20:22:45

Very exciting news Arti, though I hope he stays put for now.

Good news on the scan Beans. We must get together soon again.

Jam, when is your scan? Glad you are feeling good. If you have had a MMC before can you blag an 8 week one now?

Artichook Thu 09-May-13 09:26:40

Only one episode of Breaking Bad to go and baby has gone all quiet so I think I'm going to make it!

I felt awful last night: back ache, stomach ache, nauseated, lost that yucky plug thing but I feel totally normal today. I'm even thinking of driving to IKEA.

JamInMyWellies Thu 09-May-13 10:25:43

Go to Ikea you never know if you go into labour then you might get free meatballs for life. grin

Artichook Thu 09-May-13 10:47:08

Haven't the meatballs been uncovered as horseballs? I am not sure I want a lifetime of rolled horse meat! I've actually decided I am too lazy for IKEA, will walk to our local nice shopping street and pointlessly spend money on things for the baby's room instead.

McKayz Thu 09-May-13 11:08:10

Only the ones abroad Arti, the meatballs in the UK are fine. We got some the other week. Yum!

Rubena Thu 09-May-13 11:37:04

Urgh still couldn't stomach them. Giddyup.

Where's Vag? Off making a baby hopefully grin

DeidreBarlow Thu 09-May-13 12:45:09

Blerghh. I really don't like those meatballs!

A little girl fell over in the playground at pre school this morning. DS was no where near, came running over shouting 'it wasn't me Mummy, I didn't hurt'. I nearly burst into tearssad. Poor little man that he even had to say that. On a plus note he has been really good this week.

Arti, I think baby is coming this weekend grin

Artichook Fri 10-May-13 06:36:38

Gosh I've been awake since 4am feeling really anxious that I won't be able to handle labour. I'm also getting really stupidly worried that we have no name for this child. We just can't agree. I'm scared he will arrive today and be nameless and then I will get all hormonal and decide something silly that I live to regret.

Can I share our short list snd ask for thoughts? I don't love any of them TBH:

Freddie (my g-g grandfatger's name, fullname would be Frederick or Wilfred)
Arthur (DH's fave, I like but I don't like the nn Art)
Felix (I love, DH hates)
Rufus (ditto above)
Max (fullname Maximillian)
Alexander (may use Alex, Sandy or Sacha as nn)
Jacob (safest, lovely, but may be dull)
Oliver (ditto above)

DeidreBarlow Fri 10-May-13 07:23:46

Oh arti don't worry. It probably is just hormones...I love Arthur! I also really like Reuben and Felix.

I remember having no name we agreed on for DD. but having looked at her one of our names just seemed right. I'm sure you'll be the same. Any niggles yet?? X

McKayz Fri 10-May-13 08:15:06

I love Freddie (obviously), Felix and Reuben.

sybilfaulty Fri 10-May-13 08:18:31

Arti - if you can't handle labour you take the drugs and the pain goes. There are no medals for managing without if you need them. You will know what he name he looks like once he is here. Don't give yourself added stress. All will be well.

ZuleikaJambiere Fri 10-May-13 08:29:07

Arti you've handled 2 labours before (or was DD1 ELCS? Anyway, you've handled at least one) and delivered 2 healthy babies, and you did what you needed and opted for what you needed at the time to achieve that. Just do that again

My favourite name on your list Alexander, but you have 6 weeks to find his perfect name

DD asked me how I knew her name the other day - and I said when she was born we chose the name that suited her best. She replied 'I knew E was my name already, so why didn't you?' grin

beans37 Fri 10-May-13 08:30:56

I like Freddie and Arthur. You'll be fine, don't worry. That's what drugs are for (tra la, sung to that song, 'that's what friends are for'). Take em, take em take em. You'll cope and it'll be horrible, but you'll have a gorgeous son at the end of it - HURRAY! Thinking of you xxx

beans37 Fri 10-May-13 08:31:40

PS I also love Alexander. It's on our list too. X

beans37 Fri 10-May-13 08:32:32

We've rather anally almost decided on names already. If a boy, Edward or Alexander and a girl Victoria, known as Tor.

beans37 Fri 10-May-13 08:38:48

Final post: you can bet your arse we change our minds on the day. DD1 was Victoria for 24hrs!

sybilfaulty Fri 10-May-13 09:48:12

Beans, I wanted M to be called Edward, but DH vetoed it.

Artichook Fri 10-May-13 09:56:35

Thank you lovely ladies. I'm now in hospital waiting room awaiting second sweep of the week and I still feel really anxious. I hope they don't take my blood pressure as I'm sure it's through the roof, my heart is racing and I am all figity.

I just did the school run and a mother fromDD1's class who I hardly know came up and said "do you know your DD1 has been moved down a group for literacy?". My normal response would have been to think (a) I'm pretty sure she hasn't and (b) what business is it of yours? And (c) it's not a huge deal even if its true. But as I'm feeling so odd I got all teared-up and had to run off feeling an utter fool. I seriously need some Valium or something but instead I'm having a bloody cervical sweep! Aaaggghh.

Beans, I like Edward too and Edwin and Edgar. I also thought about Hector shortened to Tor. I'm so impressed you have the patience to keep the gender a surprise.

Rubena Fri 10-May-13 10:02:17

Hi all have had a really shit arsed buggered up 36 hours and can't stay long but wanted to comment on the names! Alexander (dh middle name and nearly ds's first) its my fav by a country mile. I also like Oliver and Max
Beans I love Victoria.
Good luck today Arti.

sybilfaulty Fri 10-May-13 10:35:52

Arti can you go and have a manicure or something utterly relaxing and calming which is just for you? Thinking of you sweetheart X

beans37 Fri 10-May-13 10:54:50

Oh Arti
Poor lamb. Deep breaths. It really does help. Close your eyes and try to think about nothing. Sounds suspiciously like meditation, doesn't it? Don't worry, you're perfectly normal to be going through all this. Nerves + hormones = crap. Lets hope the sweep does the trick, then anything else will seem like small potatoes.


Vagolajahooli Fri 10-May-13 11:08:35

Arti that women is an ucking b with an itch. In your shoes I would have teared up too, why did she feel she needed to tell you that and why doesn't someone more appropriate tell you! Sorry but that has really annoyed me, was she being helpful because she thinks dd1 shouldn't have been moved down or is she just evil.

On the name front I love Alexander of course but Reuben is also a fav with me.

Sorry to go awol but we only have Internet when we go to the cafe pool area and yesterday we went to some volcanoes and then I went for a super long run in this brilliant forest behind our cottage was so great apart from a little rain.

Still undecided though erring on the side of not. Lots of reasons like money (when we go home we will have to pay for montessori education), I also feel we have a good little unit at the moment. Also I feel like I have just gotten my life back I'm not sure how I feel about losing that all again. Also ds2 is driving me a little crazy, he has a very whingy nature & it can get quite grating on the soul. Aargh I don't know will have to think further. Need to talk to dh about it more. We haven't really properly discussed it he just dropped the revelation the other day. Bleurgh

Kayz I've not been to sSF but sure you would enjoy it, but the jetlag from over that side is a bitch. Worse than coming back from Oz for me. Took me a week to get over it.

Rubena Fri 10-May-13 11:09:02

Sorry self absorbed me at the mo. didn't read your next post.

Def don't worry. That woman needs a slap. How would she know anyway.
Little cute baby boy shortly will make it all better x

Rubena Fri 10-May-13 11:12:52

Crossed Vag. I totally get all that.

Vagolajahooli Fri 10-May-13 11:13:08

Oh and regardless of whether Rubes can get you a deal or not I would go with virgin. Your paying a lot of money anyway you don't want your trip ruined by a bad flight. The 10 hr flight to & back from LA was actually quite nice, really comfortable seats and nice cabin staff. I was travelling with the boys and it really wasn't a chore. Dh flew with American to NY and it was pretty rough. I wish virgin flew to Australia. Unfortunately I think I'm going to be flying to Oz with China southern, that is going to be a killer 34 hrs.

Rubena Fri 10-May-13 11:15:06

Thanks Vag. Cheered my daygrin
You really must come with me to Aust sometime if you can be flexible, it can be cheap.
When are you going next?

Vagolajahooli Fri 10-May-13 11:38:58

July 16th or there abouts. Can you imagine us on a flight together rubes we'd strap them in shove in their headphones and then pickle ourselves.

DeidreBarlow Fri 10-May-13 12:59:39

Arti hope the sweep is okay. That woman is an interfering biatch!! Fecking competitive parenting...what business is it of hers.angry Just ignore it. Thinking of you x

Can I just add DS had a play date this morning... He was brill shared loads, took turns no aggression...love him he's trying his very best!!

Artichook Fri 10-May-13 13:14:48

That's lovely news about Dudesboy. Go him!

Are you OK Rubes? What happened over the last 36 hours.

Midwife appt matched the rest of my day, I.e it was pretty poor. She gave me an internal ex as she swept me and basically said my cervix is less favourable than 48 hours ago (or she just made a mistake 48 hours ago!) then she found loads of blood and protein in my wee and said it was probably an infection and to get ABs from my GP. I pointed out its Fridsy and is never get an spot and asked whether, given I was in a hospital, I might get ABs there but apparently that was a voice idea. Plus she used dirty paper towels to cover me as she examined me which was really beyond what is OK.

Thanks for kind words re the interfering Mum too. She's always appeared very nice if a little mad so I have no idea why she told me like that. She said her DD told her. Why she needed to tell me I don't know. It seems unlikely as six weeks ago at parents eve the teacher told us that DD1 was really strong at literacy and I know from her exercise book that she has got 100% on every spelling this term. If she has moved down then that's fine but would you tell another mum their child was struggling on the strength if what your own six year old had told you?

Artichook Fri 10-May-13 13:16:21

Loads of predictive text robs with that post. For "voice idea" read "naive idea".

Honsandrevels Fri 10-May-13 13:51:42

Arti Rufus, Rufus, RUFUS! I absolutely love it. I like all the others too. Dd2 would have been Wilfred/Freddie. I like Rufus as it is a name everyone knows but it isn't v common.

Wow to the school mum. Why on earth is that any of her business? Hope she was just insensitive rather than a cow.

The midwife should have referred you to a consultant at clinic. Crazy to send you to the GP. They'll prob send you to the hospital.

Honsandrevels Fri 10-May-13 13:54:19

Deids That's brilliant. Your ds is a lovely boy, preschool are the problem!

Honsandrevels Fri 10-May-13 13:58:41

Three and I'm out.... can anyone recommend any apps for an Android phone or ipod for dd1 to keep her occupied on our train journey to Italy? I haven't a clue about apps but I know she likes doing drawing and matching apps at preschool on their iPad. Can you get similar for ipods? DH and I are technologicly challenged!

ShadyLadyT Fri 10-May-13 15:35:33

Waaaaah, not getting to my big catch up yet.

Arti, my faves are Rufus and Felix. Actually Felix was on our boy name list as I like Roman names cos they sound so elegant. But I don't dislike any of the names on your list, with the possible exception of Reuben (I quite like the sound of the name but I have never liked the look of it written down if that makes any sense). What that parent did was SO not on, whether or not it's true. Unbelievably spiteful. And the midwife appointment....shock Sybs is right. If it gets too much, drugs all the way.

Victoria is a really beautiful name, Beans, I have always liked it. Unfortunately I knew a really hateful Tor though and every time I see that name written down I still bristle with fury (sorry, nothing to do with actual name!)

Vag, obviously I would love you to go for No. 3, especially if we do grin

DB - I am so glad DS had a good morning. It will give him a boost.

More later hopefully.

Nolda Fri 10-May-13 17:34:18

Arti, hope you're now sorted for ABs. What a singularly unhelpful (and revolting re towels) midwife. Here are the votes of the Nolda family on the subject of names: DH and DD vote for Freddie; DS votes for Reuben or Toby (yes, I know it's not on your list but he says it's a very good name); I vote for Alex or Max (I think Max in particular would go very nicely with the names of your other DC). We don't like Felix as there is one at DD's school who is a real troublemaker. As others have said, I'm sure you won't have a problem naming him once you see his little face.

McKayz Fri 10-May-13 17:57:54

Arti, what a crappy day!! I have no idea why that woman thought that was any of her business. The MW was out of order with the towels, I would complain if you feel up to it. I have had another look at your name and I do love Rufus. Arthur would be great NN Arti grin

Rubes, are you ok? A virtual hug and wine for you.

beans37 Fri 10-May-13 18:02:48

I like Max and Felix too (in fact, they were lined up for me if I'd been a boy), but I know about 4/5 of each of them. But that's because theyr'e lovely names. Heavens, we named DD1 Isabella, the most popular name of 2008!! I know exactly what you mean, Lady, re names that make you bristle. My best friend at primary school was called Tor and that makes the name lovely for me. I was horribly bullied for a brief stint at a rank secondary school (quite famous, but shall refrain from naming it!) and the name Harriet now has terrible connotations for me. And yet it's quite a pretty name. Just not my cup of tea. But I've got the last laugh as she married a dreadful crook (also quite famous!!!).

I'm heading down to Kent tonight ready for the furniture selecting from Mum tomorrow. Suspect it'll be fairly gruelling. Mum got this date in the diary back in Feb/March so we could all make it and wants us to start at 9am, which she also made clear. My middle sister is also going down to tonight with her son, who has a swimming gala in Crawley tomorrow! She is racing him across at 7am and will be back for kick off at 9. My oldest sister is coming from London, the closest of all, and told me today she is getting the 8.37am train and could I pick her up at 9.30. I am horrified. And furious. And disgusted. She actually TOLD me that she couldn't be bothered to get out of bed earlier to get to Mum's before 9 because the rest of her family will be asleep. Mum rarely, if ever, asks anything of us, particularly the oldest as she is so useless. I am astonished that she can't even do this for Mum. I am not blowing my own, or my middle sisters' trumpets here, but since Dad died, we've been ringing Mum at least every other day. Mum admitted to me the other day that my oldest sister only tends to ring every 2 weeks, and sometimes it's Mum that has to call her. I know they're not close, but you'd think with all that Mum's gone through, my oldest sister would get off her arse and make an effort. I am seething. And, actually, like a little tell tale, I've told Mum. She is also furious and if she speaks to my oldest sister, I think is going to tell her not to bother coming!!! It's just so sad that since October last year, Mum, my middle sister and I have all got closer, but my oldest sister just seems to be pulling further and further away. She's so deeply engrossed in her own misery (which is of her own making, frankly), that she can't be anything but entirely selfish. Grrrr. Families eh?

Sorry, rant over. I didn't mean to bleat on. Feel free to ignore!!!

Arti, I am horrified by the towels. Bleugh. Oh and also, do what your gut tells you when the baby arrives on the name front. DD1 just didn't look like a Victoria, even though we'd had it lined up for ages as our girl's name!


beans37 Fri 10-May-13 18:03:23

Oh and Rubes, meant to check you're alright? What's been up?

beans37 Fri 10-May-13 18:14:17

AND I feel cross because I couldn't actually say any of those things to my oldest sister because I was so incensed and I can never think what I want to say til I've hung up and then it's too late. Suspect a few home truths may come out this weekend, which I didn't really want, but we're all so pissed off. Am worrying if it's all getting bitchy because we're all women and Dad isn't there to temper us any more. But I honestly don't think that's how it is. I think she is just entirely self-absorbed. Sorry again!

Rubena Fri 10-May-13 19:00:52

Oh thanks all. Didn't mean to alarm! Was just a crap day, the worms thing (whole fam wormed now) a situation with money (of which I thought was in business account but wasn't) so temporarily screwed majorly, pre school has 12 cases of chx pox in last 2 days so waiting to see if kids get it. If so I can't go to work, then crashed the car into a fence post which is sounding quite a lot more money to fix than first appeared sad
Just an awful day. But hey ho no one hurt.
Beans has your sister noticed that the rest of you seem closer? I'm wondering if its s chicken / egg thing? She is Sounding very unreasonable though.
Arti hang in there!
Lovely to hear about ds Deids.

Vag. Virgin does fly to Australia! Just Sydney via Hong Kong. Thing is I don't much go to Sydney so usually go on to cairns through Hong Kong or Brisbane thru Dubai.

Vagolajahooli Fri 10-May-13 19:16:21

Fuckety i wrote a hugormous post but mn had one of their offline moments and I lost the whole thing.

Arti if you have no other symptoms of an infection I would wander if the blood & protein might be contamination from what came out of your fufu. Other than that your midwife needs a headbutt, so many of them are becoming De skilled & losing ability to assess patients. Our indith will sort that out.

Hi Lady how is Italian going? Are you still thinking of no.3.

Rubes that all sucks big time. I ran into a fence once when I had a really bad cold. It's astounding how much damage it does. Thinking of you. I loved your LO's asking you to close your eyes so they can show you their tidying.

Beans that's all very hard. Maybe you should tell her to forget it and just enjoy the day with your mum & sis.

I can't remember anything else I was going to say.

Vagolajahooli Fri 10-May-13 19:18:18

Oh and yeah rubes these days I just fly into brisbane. I couldn't be faffed trying to get around seeing everyone in Sydney so I just don't see any of them. Brisbane is more doable with the kids these days. The furthest I have to go to see friends Is the sunshine coast & thats far from a chore.

McKayz Fri 10-May-13 19:20:57

Beans, will having it out with your sister make any difference to the way she behaves do you think?

beans37 Fri 10-May-13 19:28:49

I suspect not. Rink it would just sever ties entirely. V hard.

Rubes, horrid for you. No good time to have the pox, though, and in some ways good to get it done. I don't think sister did notice as initially she and I became closer than we have for a while, but then she started withdrawing again. I do feel for her in miserable marriage, but it's been going on for so long now, and we've listened to it for years and years and she won't do anything about it or listen to our advice (asked for, I hasten to add!), so gets increasingly frustrating. And makes my heart hurt a bit.

DeidreBarlow Fri 10-May-13 19:29:47

Oh rubes hun that all sounds pretty crappy! I hope your ok, have an extra large wine and some thanks x

Beans your sister sounds pretty self absorbed. I really feel for your mum having had it planned for do long. Do you think you will have it out with her? Maybe she could do to hear a few home truths. All that being said I hope you enjoy your time with your mum and sister(s)

Arti that MW sounds appalling! How are you feeling now ?

Rubena Sat 11-May-13 10:36:08

Thanks ladies. I'm still beating myself up about it but dh isn't even mad. Never Is. He sees real probs at work every day. Anyway another putting it into perspective moment. Cyclist who trains with my bro (he wasn't there but rather at ballet recital hmm) was killed on this mornings training ride. She was 37 sad

No sign of pox.
Have nice weekends.

Indith Sat 11-May-13 19:40:06

Arthur is of course a fabulous name for a boy grin

Alexander is fab too. If I had one I'd have to call him sacha.

Sorry for stresses. Not really properly read them so not going to offer anything other than kind thoughts to anyone stressed out.

This stufy lark is really killing my MN time!

Vag, if you have a min could do with some ideas here

sybilfaulty Sun 12-May-13 16:50:46

Where is everyone today? Have swum, done the shopping, played the piano, made cakes, done homework and taken L to a party. Now watching tommy zoom on cbeebies. Lovely.

Hope everyone is well abd having a restful weekend. How was yesterday beans?

McKayz Sun 12-May-13 16:56:35

Wow Sybs. You've done loads.

The boys are getting taken on holiday by XH and his sister. I think XSILs DP is going and the boys cousins. XMIL is going too and she didn't want the boys to go. They are too noisy, get up too early and are too naughty. How the hell can a grandparent be so horrible about their own grandkids. She openly says it around them too so DS2 asks why Grandma doesn't like him sad

sybilfaulty Sun 12-May-13 19:26:35

Darling Kayz, she doesn't sound great. Sadly for her, in a few years the boys will vote with their feet and refuse to spend time with her. Her loss. Your boys are stars. I love seeing pics and reading about them. You have a lovely family. Don't let one person's negativity give you stress. Love to you X

sybilfaulty Sun 12-May-13 19:28:13

Sorry Indith not to be a help on your thread. All the kids' problems are solved by lots of water and dried apricots, which is clearly not going to help you. Hope someone with experience has helped you now X

McKayz Sun 12-May-13 20:36:49

Thanks Sybs.

Someone I know is moaning they only get 7 hours of sleep a night. Do you know how much I would pay for 7 hours unbroken sleep?

DeidreBarlow Sun 12-May-13 20:40:50

Katz your ex MIL is being very mean. I think Sybs said it all. But that is so sad that your DS is picking up on her meanness. It truly is her loss she thinks like that.

Indith no advice on the poo problem. DS used to get terribly constipated but it was always a huge solid poo blocking the way. Once that shifted a couple of small softer pops and he was clear. So not the same for you at all.

DeidreBarlow Sun 12-May-13 20:41:25

Katz??shock Obv I meant Kayz grin

McKayz Sun 12-May-13 21:05:33

My phone changes Kayz to Katz too. Really annoying when I try to log into things.

Vagolajahooli Sun 12-May-13 22:58:04

Kayz that breaks my heart to hear that. Sadly I think she is taking out whatever issues she has with her son, on his children. That is really truly spiteful. As Sybs says she will miss out on their love & respect when they are older. Dh's family, as I have said before, are a bit funny with ds2. My mum showers him with attention by way of compensation. Its quite sweet, he loves it.

Sybs you are on a warning, if you continue being a supermum you will have your vino rights revoked.

Indith, I don't think I was much help on the thread. Work with your GP but as others have said look at getting a referral to a gastro team at some stage. There was a super nutritionist in Derby who was brilliant with dhs gastro problems. But very expensive and a long way from you.

I'm on high study time for the next five days I have my final assessment for this unit to complete so will be popping on for study pal support.

Artichook Mon 13-May-13 07:16:04

Good luck with the studies Veg, any further chats with your DH re DC3?

Kayz, that is sad about your MiL. Do your boys want to go away with her? I hope your XP is sensitive to the situation and protects them.

Congrats Aber!

Induction booked for today. I'm still not sure I will agree to it but DH has a hugely important meeting on Fri where he must pitch to THE Gvnr at his new work and i think he is sesperate for me to agree to tiday so he can guarantee i wont be in labour on Fri. Also my BP is really high (well 160/90) on our home monitor so i doubt they will let me out once i go in. My lovely friends all came over last night with champagne and pizzas and pampering presents. It was a great evening but I had two Glasses of champers and I can feel it this morning which isn't a great start. My girls are jumping in our bed singing "the baby is coming today", I'm desperately trying to manage expectations.

JamInMyWellies Mon 13-May-13 08:32:14

Good Luck Arti! grin

ZuleikaJambiere Mon 13-May-13 08:46:37

Good luck Arti xx

McKayz Mon 13-May-13 09:18:20

Hope it goes well Arti!! X

The boys are very excited about their holiday. I think XSIL is going to hire a 7 seater and XMIL is taking her car so she can do other stuff.

DeidreBarlow Mon 13-May-13 09:55:50

Ooh good luck Arti!

sybilfaulty Mon 13-May-13 09:56:24

Wishing you a good day arti. Hope all goes well. Your lovely young fellow will be here before you know it. Take care and much love xxx

Artichook Mon 13-May-13 13:02:31

Induction underway. Eeeek! Feeling v scared but my midwife today is really lovely and she already has all sorts of drugs lined up for me so now all I need is some contractions.

Rubena Mon 13-May-13 13:19:17

Good luck Arti! Lots of love from San Francisco xx

JamInMyWellies Mon 13-May-13 13:27:52

super exciting Arti!

sybilfaulty Mon 13-May-13 13:28:15

You go girl! Take the drugs if you need to. Lots of love from s London.

sybilfaulty Mon 13-May-13 13:29:13

Do you realise this thread has been going for OVER 5 YEARS now? Love you girls xxxx

Indith Mon 13-May-13 13:38:31

Woohoo! Go Arti!

ShadyLadyT Mon 13-May-13 13:47:36

BEST OF BRITISH, ARTI! Hope it goes super smoothly. My SIL speaks fondly of her inductions - hope it's the same for you. Much love from LadyT and all the Gs xxxxx

Nolda Mon 13-May-13 14:47:20

Good luck, Arti!

Artichook Mon 13-May-13 15:36:27

Three hours in and I'm getting some mild contractions but nothing huge. They felt a lot worse when I was walking around but I am right in the centre of town so walking around feels very public and I've retreated back to my cubicle. DH just beat me at three different card games which isn't really fair as surely if I should ever be allowed to win its now.

beans37 Mon 13-May-13 16:55:17

Ooh ooh, so exciting! What a treat to have a new nipper joining us! Hurrah!

Wow, 5 years! How lovely. That's such a lovely stat. Was going to whinge about how tired I am after DD1's sleepless night, but I'm not going through labour, so don't feel I can complain at all! Look forward to hearing any news, Arti xx

Artichook Mon 13-May-13 16:57:41

Just scared a lot of people in various shops as was sent out for a walk but am contracting every four mins. Contractions pretty regular but v short. Much, much less painful when I sit down so midwife trying to keep me up.

Indith Mon 13-May-13 17:02:53

That's great Arti, sounds like you are doing fabulously.

JamInMyWellies Mon 13-May-13 17:15:06

Well done arti.

McKayz Mon 13-May-13 17:15:39

You are doing brilliantly Arti!

beans37 Mon 13-May-13 17:45:29

Whoop whoop! Xx

DeidreBarlow Mon 13-May-13 18:03:18

Yay go Arti!! X

JamInMyWellies Mon 13-May-13 18:34:43

Are we doing a sweepstake on time of birth? I am going for 10.56pm.

ShadyLadyT Mon 13-May-13 18:36:01

Also with every contraction think you never have to go through this again and you are getting closer to your lovely new babe...xxx

ZuleikaJambiere Mon 13-May-13 18:45:57

Go Arti, keep walking and keep those contractions coming! I'm going to say sooner Jam, 914pm is my bet

JamInMyWellies Mon 13-May-13 18:46:38

Of course also what Lady T said grin.

But times anyone? wink

Artichook Mon 13-May-13 19:05:29

I think you are all being a tad optimistic, contractions still the same, no longer or more painful although they are regular. I say 3am and 9lbs 8oz.

beans37 Mon 13-May-13 19:22:07

Yes, I reckon 14th May, around 2.45am!


ShadyLadyT Mon 13-May-13 19:26:56

Oooh, bets!

14th May, only just. 00.07.

Weight: 9lbs 2oz.

Arti, I might do my big catch up tonight and you can yawn the baby out...

McKayz Mon 13-May-13 19:42:26

I am going for 3:22am 9lb 5oz

Artichook Mon 13-May-13 19:52:12

Oh please do LadyT, I need distraction. Things starting to really hurt now but trying to keep busy. Have now beaten DH at cards and finished The Unlikely Pilgrimage of Harold Fry (recommended, I liked it). I'm about to run out if data allowance though. Disaster! Why don't hospitals have wifi??? I'd pay the NHS good money for wifi.

ShadyLadyT Mon 13-May-13 20:07:52

I think you need to log in on DH's phone grin

I will try to finish it a bonne heure. Actually, Beans recommended that book to me and I still haven't read it (I will though). My next book group book is an unappealing volume called The Giver. I think it's a teen/young adult book and it depicts a dystopian futuristic world, all of which do the precise opposite of tick my box.

Hennyway, apart from hopefully doing my catch up I am shortly going to eat my homemade butternut squash, spelt and lemon thyme soup. Now, don't all rush to ask me for the recipe at once* grin *as if

Rubena Mon 13-May-13 20:17:12

Arti if you want boring ramble, count on me to accommodate. I have free wifi at the Cheesecake Factory grin
Hmm 5 years wow Yes I remember the time I signed up to MN. Was sitting on my couch in Devon with a new puppy. Pregnant, new I was moving back to London area within 6 months, didn't bother meeting any local mums, slightly nervous as 1st baby and no family around (and living quite remote) You lot have been a lifeline!

Rubena Mon 13-May-13 20:18:49

Cross posted lady. That soup sounds delightful. And you claim not to cook!

Rubena Mon 13-May-13 20:22:15

Crikey Arti. No wifi?? Thats crap.

I've never gone over data allowance...... That I know of hmm

Hospitals suck. I think dh owes it to you to hand over the phone grin

beans37 Mon 13-May-13 20:22:47

Ooh, I'm trying to read Battle Hymn of a Tiger Mother for book club tomorrow. Struggling a bit.

Harold Fry lovely! My Mum hated it though!

DD1 afflicted by godawful cough and cannot go to sleep. Think I have finally settled her. DH manfully mowing in the rain so he doesn't have to at weekend. I am avoiding windows onto garden so I don't get roped into moving outdoor furniture. Given every room in the downstairs looks onto garden apart from the loo, I'm standing in the corridor! Evil me!

Oh Arti, you are doing so well. Remember your breathing. Deep breaths through the contractions. We're all rooting for you! It's rather wonderful! X

Rubena Mon 13-May-13 20:28:44

Love it beans. Brilliant.
How does dh mow in rain? Isn't it soggy?
Arti are you there? Or data zero?
The stark contrast between intellectual and classy ladyt (and beans) to Rubena posts must be at least a little Borden alleviating!

Rubena Mon 13-May-13 20:29:35

Boredom I clearly meant!

sybilfaulty Mon 13-May-13 20:44:45

Gosh I was wailing for drugs about 2 hours into my induction. You are clearly made of girders.

I predict c 2am arrival, bonny lad bouncing in at 10lb 2. Very excited. The only live birth thread I've done has been for cats xxx

Artichook Mon 13-May-13 20:49:46

I'm here reading away. Feeling a bit sorry for myself that things aren't obviously progressing yet have progressed enough to mean I can't sleep or rest. I need to get my energy back somehow.

Don't even ask me why I am over data allowance. DH and I are completely incapable of sorting basic telecommunications. My iPhone refuses to log on to our home wifi so I do everything on 3G and as all my MN, FB and eVay is done via phone that's quite a bit if data. Plus work emails with big attachments.

sybilfaulty Mon 13-May-13 20:57:42

Can you eat? Maybe something like a cheese sandwich which will give you energy ? So excited for your lovely boy. What a wonderful family he is joining.

Are your waters still there or have they gone?

Vagolajahooli Mon 13-May-13 21:01:14

Oh Arti how exciting. Stab in the dark, I would say 1.37 14th. I think I am really just willing it to be not too long away. I think in honesty I'd like it to be today, around 11pm. Ds2 was born on the 13th its a lovely date.

Beans I've read battle him of the tiger mother for a book club. I kept reading it hoping for her to change or something. I won't ruin it for you....but I didn't like it.

Still no movement on the 3rd decision. Though my brother's 2nd wife is pregnant with their 2nd. It will be his 6th child, he is 47.

Rubes that is terrible news about that cyclist. I lost a very beautiful friend when I was pregnant with ds1. He was hit whilst out on a training ride by a driver who had fallen asleep at the wheel. Australian roads scare me for cycling. Driving attitudes really need to change over there.

Rubena Mon 13-May-13 21:06:22

Thanks Vag x Yeah turns out it was an 18 year old who blew .08- bastard. Its so sad. Yes I remember that when you posted. As my brother said, changes your perspective entirely. Poor girl and her family.

Arti I see yes if it's work related stuff as well. No doubt.

McKayz Mon 13-May-13 21:34:17

Arti, I hope you can maybe get a bit of rest.

If the past few nights are anything to go by I'll probably be awake if you post.

I never thought a baby could sleep as badly as DS2. I was wrong.

ZuleikaJambiere Mon 13-May-13 21:36:16

Drat, I was too keen, my bet has passed! Can I make another? I'm also willing the 13th Vag, as its my DD2s birthday too.

Vagolajahooli Mon 13-May-13 21:36:22

Its probably a bit late now Arti but when I was having ds2 I ate noodles and nut & seed bars. Later in the labour I drank lots of sweet milky tea. It really sorted me out energy wise.

McKayz Mon 13-May-13 21:37:02

Oh and if any of you believe in miracles keep your fingers crossed for us. We have really bad credit ratings but a company thinks they can help DH secure a mortgage. They will ring tomorrow. We are fully expecting it to be a no but we can dream.

Vagolajahooli Mon 13-May-13 21:42:06

White light for you Kayz.

DeidreBarlow Mon 13-May-13 21:44:54

14th may, 3.33amgrin. Go arti hope your doing okay and necessary drugs doing their thing!

Question for everyone, how many of the Dec 08 children are TT at night?? DS is nowhere near! Getting a bit of grief from mum that he should be. But his pull ups are wet through on the morning. For the past few nights I've gone in and lifted him but even after an hour he's peed. So short of lifting him on the hour, every hour I've no idea what to doconfused. Days he's absolutely fine no issues!!

DeidreBarlow Mon 13-May-13 21:48:01

X Posts there! Kayz I hope things work out for you re: the mortgage.

McKayz Mon 13-May-13 21:54:01

Deids DS2 has been dry for a week. He just decided he was a big boy now.

Nolda Mon 13-May-13 22:10:06

I say 02.08 14 May, 9lbs 15.

Kayz, hope it's good news on the mortgage.

Deids, DS is the same re nighttime TT. I only tried lifting him once as he was totally distraught. We have had one dry pull-up overnight ever. I'm not worried yet. It is difficult when family members make unhelpful comments though.

Rubena Mon 13-May-13 22:10:57

How very odd Deids I was going to say the exact same time!!!
I will say 313am then as I have a weird thing with 3's hmm
Deids I don't lift ds (never have, probably should) and every night I put pull up on. Sometimes I hear him get up and pee in the night, and he's dry in morn but MOST nights there's a little wee in there. My bro's youngest was nearly 6. Don't worry. I'm not. My mil is the same, yet not open about it. It's more the quiet comments. I don't care.

ShadyLadyT Mon 13-May-13 22:13:12

Dash it, not going to get this catch up done tonight!

Don't worry DB - DD1 is nowhere near either. Same here. But since she was so slow to be potty trained I am guessing it's just going to take ages and I am not going to get myself worked up about it...Especially as she doesn't even want to try not to wear a pull up.

Kayz - crossing everything for you. But listen - I do know about credit ratings. It has taken me nearly 18mths to build mine back up. (I went over overdraft limits and maxed cards and things because I had to). So you have much sympathy from me. But if this company doesn't work out, if you can give yourselves a year or more, you can honestly repair your rating. Oh - and your MIL is being a cowbag. But you know that. How utterly dreadful that she doesn't treasure her lovely grandsons sad

Rubes - are you still in San Fran? As for intellectual - pffft! Hey - I have had most of my trees felled and the garden looks pretty radical...How horrifying about the cyclist. Sorry about your bad day the other day, by the way. Glad you're ok.

Beans - I do want to chat to you about your sister situation but how did it all go at the weekend?

Arti, you've gone all quiet! Or maybe just quiet on here. Aren't people supposed to eat those glucose tablets in labour to keep up their energy? However, my grip on what people do in labour is very loose at best so that could easily be what people did in 1956 grin We're cheering you on, my love!

Vagolajahooli Mon 13-May-13 22:13:17

Deids vagboymark2 is only dry if we wee him at around 11pm. Even then he will wet at around 6am at least one a week. Though that is reducing and is usually if he is over tired. Ds1 was in pull ups until he was almost 5 & was always super wet.It has never really bothered me as I was the same and eveeventually grew out of it. Mum went through a lot of stress trying to sort it out, alarms (which woke the whole house except me), stopping medrinking fluids after certain times, medication. In the end I was and still am a very deep sleeper & as I said I eventually grew out of it. When DS1 had his 5.5 year check here, we were still lifting him at 11pm for a wee. The doctor at the medical check said this was fine & entirely normal. Tell your mum to chill out Deids, if it bothering you and you want to see if you can do something talk to your GP. Otherwise it will eventually settle.

ShadyLadyT Mon 13-May-13 22:15:49

X-posted Rubes!

ShadyLadyT Mon 13-May-13 22:16:59

X-posted Vag!

And Kayz - I meant your XMIL of course.

Vagolajahooli Mon 13-May-13 22:18:03

Maybe being dry through the night is like babies sleeping through the night. In reality it happens a lot later than many believe it should.

Rubena Mon 13-May-13 22:24:57

Vag I remember at 9 my mum had this puzzle thing from the GP to help me stop wetting the bed! I'm assured it was not every night. Sadly I'm a light sleeper too! smilesmile

Yes lady left Sun back Wed. I never do 2 nighters shock missing the kidlets a bit. Ds was throwing up after I left. He was the same last weekend which was odd and both times has lasted only a few hours so no idea what it was. Haven't told anyone I'm in in town as wanted to rest rather than catch up. Bit rude huh. Even ditched the GG bridge ride with some of crew but might catch up for a bite later with some for a bite.

Indith Mon 13-May-13 22:29:26

dd is still in a nappy at night. I don't lift, I think it encourages weeing in their sleep. ds1 became dry at 5.5 all by himself so I'm letting dd get there in her own time.

TheInvisibleHand Mon 13-May-13 22:31:40

Arti - fully looking forward to coming on here tomorrow and seeing news of your boy...

Deids - DS still in pull ups and wet (sometimes wet through) at night. Oddly enough, the only night we left him without a pull up (we'd run out) he woke up dry, but I haven't dared tempt fate, especially as he's not really up for it.

Vag, rubes, going to need your Oz tips sometime. Some mad people are willing to fly me out this summer to give a talk. Never been to your part of the world, so all new to me. Will be out there for about 2 weeks Melbourne/Sydney, but odd mix of being on my own/mostly for work. DH slowly getting over the fact that I'm leaving him to it for the first couple of weeks of the hols. Am feeling a bit guilty. But only a bit.

beans37 Mon 13-May-13 22:36:25

I'm taking silence from Arti as sign of progression. Love that we're all supporting from different places. Please do the same for me in 4 months!

DD1 dry at night v early, ie. at 2.5. However, DD2 showing no sign of it at all. No probs in day, but loves to wee in her pull up. Especially in the mornings before getting out of bed! Little monkey!

DeidreBarlow Mon 13-May-13 22:58:32

Thanks ladies. Deep down I know he'll get there in his own time. I think my mum was trying to be helpful, but failed!! DD quite literally TT herself and was dry at night by 2.4yrs.

ShadyLadyT Mon 13-May-13 23:07:15

Course we will, Beans.

Lovely to see you, Invis!

We're having an Arti party! I will shortly be changing into pyjamas though.

SummerLightning Mon 13-May-13 23:19:53

Ooh how exciting! Go arti! Hope quiet means things are speeding up.

I guess 3:45 am.

Ds is also in pull-ups at night and it almost always has wee in it in the morning. Dd however is usually dry so she may beat him too it. She is supposedly potty trained but really has not mastered poo yet. GROSS!

ShadyLadyT Mon 13-May-13 23:27:24

Hello Summer, lovely to see you too. I was meaning to say to you thanks for lettong me know about the new Cazalet novel - made me happy and sad as I used to represent the author but now obviously I don't know the first thing about her!

Also, I was thinking that you, Rubes and Beans all have DDs who will only be in the year below our Dec 2008 nippers at school! However, as my DD2 was born in Sept she will be 2 yrs below.

How are you doing, Arti? Is it phone or labour that's responsible? Remember I said seven minutes past midnight...

Artichook Mon 13-May-13 23:40:48

It's phone rationing.

Am officially slowest labourer ever. Every time it takes me forever. Hour 11 and they are abt to break my waters when all I want is to sleep. Must. Keep. Eye. On. Prize.

Thanks for all yr support, it's keeping me nicely distracted.

Oh and DD2 still sopping wet every night. DD1 was dry before age 3.

SummerLightning Mon 13-May-13 23:56:29

Ah bugger arti. Hang on in there.

That's cool that you used to represent cazalet lady ladyt. I will definitely read it when it comes out. Loved those books! (Read at your recommendation)

Yeah only 1 school year between my two. Which is good cos next year will be a pain with two different childcare arrangements

ShadyLadyT Tue 14-May-13 00:01:16

I wish there was only a school year between mine! Missed it by a month.

Sorry Arti - I would love to stay up with you but it's bedtime for dollies, as we say in this house. I don't understand why you can't just sleep for a bit but obviously I am a total div about how it works. I hope he comes soon - maybe breaking the waters will help a lot? Hang in there - last leg. Xxxxxx

SummerLightning Tue 14-May-13 00:18:21

Am off to bed too - lots of luck arti! You are doing brilliantly. Try and rest a bit before they break waters if they haven't already?

Rubena Tue 14-May-13 00:22:22

Hi lady Yes realised recently that I will have to apply for dd school v soon and was quite shocked as I hadn't remembered that with all the ds school stuff!!
I'm currently checkin in on random shops wifi and out for a bite to eat but will check in later Arti when I'm back at hotel xx

Of course Beans!!

Artichook Tue 14-May-13 05:11:11

Baby boy arrived 2.15am. A relatively tiny 7lbs 14oz. We went from nothing to everything v quickly: 2cm to delivery was 1 hour 50 mins. No time for ANY pain relief. I mooed and screamed and begged but he wasn't waiting. He is gorgeous and tiny and nameless.

Rubena Tue 14-May-13 05:15:55

Wow!!! let me be the first of thread CONGRATULATIONS!!!!
Brilliant effort Arti !! You are hard core with no drugs. I cannot wait to see some pics. Glad it was quick in the end and what a tiny little fella. Get some rest and enjoy xxxxx

Rubena Tue 14-May-13 05:18:05

Just noticed the time you posted that! Bloody good timing for me to check on you!!! So pleased for you xxx

sybilfaulty Tue 14-May-13 06:02:47

WHat l;ovely news! Huge congratulations to you darling. You are a superstar! My boy was the tiniest of the 3, too. Hope you are having a rest XXX

JamInMyWellies Tue 14-May-13 06:33:08

Super news well done lovely! gringrin

Indith Tue 14-May-13 06:44:42

wow, arti congratulations! enjoy smile

McKayz Tue 14-May-13 06:51:57

Congratulations!!! Xxx

ZuleikaJambiere Tue 14-May-13 07:02:14

Congratulations, he sounds gorgeous. Give him a snuggle from me. And these are for youthanks and either brew or wine, whichever you need most after your amazing work xx

SummerLightning Tue 14-May-13 07:05:55

Yay congratulations well done arti!

Nolda Tue 14-May-13 07:06:58

Congratulations, Arti!!!

DeidreBarlow Tue 14-May-13 07:17:22

Congratulations Arti wonderful news! smile

ShadyLadyT Tue 14-May-13 07:20:00

Woo! What a Billy Whizz! That sounds very intense - hope you are ok, Arti - but well done and so many congrats. Kisses to all of you. Hope you are managing to rest now.

TheInvisibleHand Tue 14-May-13 07:33:11

Wonderful, congratulations arti!

Vagolajahooli Tue 14-May-13 07:40:15

Hooray! Well done Arti. What a relief after all your worry about whether you could do it; and you go & deliver from an induced labour without drugs. Bloody hell your a marvel! Now welcome to the world of willies!

You were quick off the mark Rubes a good time to check. I'm well jel of your quiet time but would miss the wee ones.

The boys have school photos today so was frantically trying to make them look presentable this morning. Ds1 is quite interested in his appearance so was doing his hair beautifully and chose his clothes. But ds2 not so much, plus he has had a horrid rash around hos face that us now all dry & crusty. Nice.

sybilfaulty Tue 14-May-13 07:49:09

Arti, your son shares his birthday with cate blanchett, George Lucas a d mark zuckerberg. Wow!

poisondwarf Tue 14-May-13 08:00:10

Congratulations Arti! When are the girls coming to meet their little brother? Does he look like any of your names?

Vagolajahooli Tue 14-May-13 10:56:53

I think because of your current MN handle he should be named Arthur....or Artichoke.

Vagolajahooli Tue 14-May-13 10:57:51

Hey poison! Nice to see you, how's tricks. Anymore plans for Amsterdam?

ZuleikaJambiere Tue 14-May-13 11:00:29

I agree with Vag, I met a baby Arthur last week who already is called Arti by his family. There is no other choice for our newest thread member

Who win the sweepstake for time of birth? We were all miles off on weight!

beans37 Tue 14-May-13 11:38:27

Hurray for Arti and little nameless! Well done, you hardcore person! What a superstar. You were the first thing I thought about this morning and I've only just now had time to find out if he'd arrived!

I guessed 2.45am, I think I might be the winner????? Although I didn't out in for a weight. Bum.

Well done! Happy days!

ZuleikaJambiere Tue 14-May-13 11:58:05

As DD is snoozing after swimming, I've had time to check the winner, and I'm afraid it's not you Beans - Nolda was only 7 minutes out, with 208am!

McKayz Tue 14-May-13 12:06:01

They said no to the mortgage. We're going to be stuck in this house forever.

beans37 Tue 14-May-13 12:20:31

Bumholes! Was sure it was me! That's what DD2 calls Mr Tumble; Mr Bumhole. No influence from me, of course.

Has anyone heard from Kiwi at all?

beans37 Tue 14-May-13 12:20:59

Oh Kayz, didn't see your post. I'm so sorry to hear that. X

DeidreBarlow Tue 14-May-13 12:45:43

Oh Kayz sorry it was bad news on the mortgage. Did they say it was because of your credit rating? They really can be repaired, it might take a while but it can be done. You might be in that house a bit longer than planned but not necessarily forever.

McKayz Tue 14-May-13 12:49:57

Just because of the credit rating. DH thinks it stays on your system for 6 years even if you paid everything off. So it'll be 6 years he thinks.

JumpJockey Tue 14-May-13 12:56:11

Arti fantastic news! Just saw the pic on FB and realised I've missed your live labour updates - what a beautiful photo and well done you!

Nolda Tue 14-May-13 13:29:26

Yay! I won! <Does a little dance>.

Sorry about the no go on the mortgage Kayz.

grin World of willies, Vag! Arti, has he weed on you yet?

PinguRocks Tue 14-May-13 17:19:09

Big congrats Arti! Boo Kayz but it really won't be forever - you can improve your credit rating no probs! Congrats to Jammy too. You are braver than me - there is no way we will be going for numero 3.
Well we are in sunny Orlando coming to the end of what was a lovely holiday and poor DD2 has the pox and has been declared unfit to fly. I am going to be stuck here with a quarantined toddler until at least the weekend. Am sending DH and DD1 home as planned as DD1 hasn't had it and I don't want to be stuck here for yet another week if she does - rubbish. Have got calomine and porridge oats but anyone got any other tips - you can't get vitrasooth here - they vaccinate so don't seem to have lts available. Help!

poisondwarf Tue 14-May-13 19:00:08

Arti how's the little fella? Are you out yet?

Jam congrats on your bun in the oven! <late to the party>. Having difficulty keeping up - have you had your first scan yet?

Vag yes soz didn't reply to your post about the Dam ages ago. Would love to come over at some point but things tend to get a bit busy over summer plus am feeling the pinch after mucho car trouble recently. Maybe later in the year? Also in summer we are probably driving to Czech Republic via Belgium/Germany (probably late July/early August) - will be camping on the way there/way back so if you fancied a cheeky weekend camping maybe we could sort something out? Ha I like world of willies. Although to me it is more like world of balls. Takes me back to lovingly removing sticky yellow shit out of each and every crease on the sac. Ah, memories!

Pingu hello! Sorry to hear about DD but hope you can make the most of your few days of unexpected hols. You're a SAHM now right? How's that going?

Kayz sorry to hear about the mortgage. Bummer. Have you got any other options you're looking at? Were you looking at the Help to Buy Scheme? If not it might be worth looking at as your mortgage would be smaller so might not be as affected by adverse credit <optimistic>.

Rubes horrible news about DH's training buddy. I was thinking about her on my cycle to work & back - terrifying really. Bet it's shaken DH up.

spot are you around? How is your job search going? Will that be the deciding factor in staying put or upping sticks?

Hello Invis! Trip Down Under sounds exciting!

Beans probably missed the update but how did it all go with your sis?

LadyT fill me in on your italiano. Is it a group lesson? Are you making progress? And most importantly are you planning a trip over there to try it out?

Hello to all I've missed.

On the dry at night thing we're lucky here that both DCs have been dry early on. No idea why that is as I was wetting my bed until an embarrassing age - I'm 43 and still embarrassed about it! I had the alarms & stuff too but they never worked. Never got to the bottom of why but the thinking at the time seemed to be that it was a psychological rather than a physical issue.

DD is such a poppet. She's just sellotaped a heart-shaped paper on my back - it says "To mummy I love you love from N xxx". Aww. So sweet. And SO different from DS.

McKayz Tue 14-May-13 19:13:25

Poison it was the help to buy scheme. DH has talked to a broker who is going to look over everything and see if he can find anything. DHs Nan has asked if she can be a guarantor for us but it doesn't look possible. It's such a shame as they did all the affordability and we can easily afford it.

McKayz Tue 14-May-13 19:14:04

It's a brand new house too and the plans look great. Never mind.

Arti, that is such lovely news, and wonderful pix on FB. He is scrummy!

Kayz, what a bummer about the mortgage sad. Is there anyone else you could ask/they might accept as a guarantor, or are they against the whole idea in principle?

Hi Poison, what a lovely (and talented) DD you have there! Doing ok here, thanks. Had a job interview today (in Hayward's Heath), so 10 mins up the line, and if I don't get that, I have another interview in Brighton (10 mins down the line) later this month. DP also dealing with being here a bit better, he's found someone on his wavelength and went out for a beer with him last night, so it's looking up.

Pingu, that really sucks about the pox. I have to say, though, that B did much better on Calamine than virasoothe (he had very pus-y spots and it helped to dry them out) so please don't think it's a miracle cure that's out of your reach! Do you have different types of antihistamine she can take?

Can I ask some advice please? I cannot for the life of me get B to brush his teeth (or let me do it). i have tried threats, bribery, distraction, persuasion, singing. NADA. I know it's important to pick your battles, but this battle is one that matters to me. Any suggestions gratefully received!

McKayz Tue 14-May-13 20:33:04

It's the whole idea apparently. Though they told DH that if he was on a low income they would accept the guarantor. So I don't really understand why they can't do it.

Vagolajahooli Tue 14-May-13 20:50:28

Sorry about the mortgage Kayz. The banks are being really sucky at the moment. Considering they are wanting to get the building industry moving, you wanting to buy a new build it good for the economy.

Poison that would be lovely but I'm in Oz then.

Hons a trip to Australia yay. What do you want to know? Will you have a car? How long in each city?

Hi Pingu. Get yourself some priton and wait it out. You are doing those around you a big favour as adults in the US, most of whom had CP as kids, don't get their antibodies topped up by being in contact with CP so are at risk of shingles when they age.

Good luck Cat.

The boys had school photos today and where so excited to tell me they had a photo taken together. Can hardly wait to see the results.

I'm putting in the application to take the boys out of school to go to Australia. Fingers crossed.

Artibaby is delicious. He almost looked like he had a smirk on his face in the FB photo. Like he's thinking "nailed that labour thing"

Sorry about the teeth thing, the boys are (touch wood) really good with teeth brushing. I rarely have to even remind them to brush. Not sure if it would help but I started the boys off with a chewing tooth brush. It's a baby one and it got them into doing it themselves early. Maybe you could go back to something like that to get him into it. Alternatively, they sell light saber tooth brushes over here. The boys love them. They press a button and light up for about a minute & the boys have to keep brushing until the light stops. I could buy one & pop it in the post for you. Oh & I've always gotten the boys to choose their own toothbrushes when we are at the shops. Not sure if that encourages them or not. If all else fails you could take him to a dentist & get him/her to teach him about why he needs to brush.

Vagolajahooli Tue 14-May-13 21:08:48

Kayz you watching the game?

McKayz Tue 14-May-13 21:12:32

I am. Not quite as nerve wracking as it was. I hope they keep this up. I can't cheer as DD is asleep on me.

I wish I knew how to get her to stay in the cot.

Vagolajahooli Tue 14-May-13 21:14:49

Hey Arti, does he look like the girls when they were bubs? He's got a very unsquishy face for a out the fufu birth.

Vagolajahooli Tue 14-May-13 21:18:54

Yep they have scored twice since I posted that. Oh gosh I couldn't tell you how many times I made the boys cry when I yelled out when a goal was scored. Dh & always worried I was going to turn them off football as they would associate the game with having the shi-ite suddenly scared out of them.

McKayz Tue 14-May-13 21:20:21


Ramsey scored. Someone famous dies when he scores. Eeeek

sybilfaulty Tue 14-May-13 21:28:19

Cat, do their teeth in front of telly if all else fails. We have a cup for water and another comme spittoon then they goggle at telly whilst I get in there. Well done on interviews too.

Hope you are home arti and that your bits are not too sore. He is very smooth for a vag baby. Beautiful. Loved the blanket too.

Who is this "Cat" you are talking about, Vag and Sybs? <glares sternly>.
Thanks for the toothing advice though, I think I may use a combination of your tactics. And thanks for the light sabre toothbrush offer, Vag, I may take you up on that if all else fails!

JamInMyWellies Tue 14-May-13 22:18:44

Spot you could do out method when DS2 is being a little toad about brushing his teeth. One if us holds his hands and body then the other shoves it in a gives it a good waggle around. Parents of the yr award!

Vagolajahooli Tue 14-May-13 22:36:37

Cos you are spot, as...in....Cats...have...spots??? [Blush]<Vag shrivels under Spots icy glare>

Vagolajahooli Tue 14-May-13 22:37:50

<vag slinks back in> and blush's properly.

Rubena Tue 14-May-13 22:43:01

Hiya pingu! Sorry I had meant to get back to you to say you didn't tell me which flight number you were on, rather only the date, then it all got too late but hope flight was ok! Sorry about the pox, and good decision sending the others home. Hope you get cleared soon.
We have something like 15 cases of pox at nursery most of which were in Pre school and my two still nothing - odd. Dh's mum never got it either so if they go get it soon I won't have any back up childcare!
Vag wow are they like schools in the UK? I'm terrified of the attendance thing here. So strict.
Spot, ds hated it at first, I used to sit on him if he wouldn't let me which he hated more, and then he decided allowing me or brushing himself was easier. DD always been fine as she watched ds and wants to do everything he does. You can get those light up minute toothbrushes in UK I've seen them in Sainsbury's.
right, must get sorted its nearly home time.

Vagolajahooli Wed 15-May-13 08:14:52

They are super strict here Rubes. If we were in the UK we would probably just call in sick as it is just the last 4 days before school breaks up for the summer. But here if we did that the council would come around to the house & check if the kids were at home. The school can't even lie for us and say we are sick as they will still check. If they had dutch passports we would also need the ok from them so we can actually take the kids through immigration. Apparently they csn stop people at the airport who are taking kids out during school time. They won't literally stop them leaving but they will report them to their local gemeente. The fine is €75 a day. If they don't allow it we are still going to go as it is well worth the cost of the fine for the cheaper airfare. Generally though they are pretty good and as my step father is having treatment for prostate cancer I think they can't really say no.

Artichook Wed 15-May-13 09:02:16

Hi Again

We are home and had a pretty good first night. DS fed at 8.40pm, we all went to sleep at 9pm and he didn't waken again until 1.45am! I fed him, he vommed a bit then slept 'til 5am. I fed him and he just woke again now.

Here is my birth story for those that like that sort of detail (feel free to skip):

1.50pm 13/5: induction started with a pessary. At this point II was only 2cm dilated with a long, tough cervix.. I was put on a monitor and after 20 mins or so could see some regular tightenings but they felt like Braxton Hicks.

3pm: went for walk around the area. Walking made it feel like things were happening as the tightenings hurt more. It felt very public to be contracting in a busy shopping neighbourhood so we soon returned to the ward where I sat on birthing ball for hours playing cards with DH. Sitting calmed all pains down and again it felt like simple regular Braxton hicks.

6pm: examined and I was 2cm dilated still but cervix was shorter so midwife said they would break my waters. Annoyingly we needed to wait for a bed on the labour ward and nothing came free 'til nearly midnight. While we waited all tightenings and pains totally stopped which was dispiriting.

12 midnight: i was v tired and doubted it was wise to kick start a whole night of labour but nevertheless my waters were broken and I was told I was still only 2cm and the head was high. The midwife suspected I would need the syntocin drip but suggested walking about for a few hours.

12.30 - 1am: walked the deserted hospital corridors with DH. Contractions started and were immediately quite painful and 2.5 mins apart, lasting between 30 and 50 seconds.

1am: returned to our room, midwives asked if I was contracting and we told them the timings but as I was chatting away they clearly didn't think much was happenings. Contractions actually paused while I chatted to midwives.

1.10am: sitting on birthing ball the contractions suddenly became overwhelming. I had to stand-up and sway through each one and couldn't talk. Begged DH to get a midwife so I could have my epidural. Midwife came in and said she'd examine me in an hour and if I was in established labour then I could have epidural. I cried.

1.20am: I'm going crazy, I scream at DH to get midwife again and insist she gives me my epidural. He tries to calm me, I shout "You are here to fucking advocate for me, I don't want your kind words, ADVOCATE!"

1.30am: midwife tells me she will compromise and examine me in 15 minutes. I can't talk except to moan "epidural, epidural, epidural" she starts to look concerned and stays in the room.

1.40am: midwife finally examines me and says "Oh God you are 7cm and very stretchy, we better hurry if you want an epidural". I shout "that's what I've been saying all along!". She runs off to find anesthetist and second midwife.

1.50am: I am on the bed screaming for epidural, two midwives tell me there is no time, I scream "this was never the plan, I never wanted to feel pushing out a baby."

1.55am: I scream I need to push, anaesthetist arrives, takes one look at me and leaves. I've never felt a sensation like it. Midwives beg me to breath the baby out, I'm so scared of tearing I try and concentrate on slowly breathing and actually everything feels slightly more manageable now I'm pushing.

2.05am: breath head out, can't believe I have to live with it out for a few mins until I can push again, desperately try and remember its nearly all over. Midwives say to breath deeply and breath him out.

2.15am: Rest of him arrives. Immense and immediate feeling of relief is like nothing I've ever experienced. DS is put on my tummy and cries immediately. Midwives say I have only tiniest tear and that I had breathed him out in an incredibly controlled manner that is v rate given i had no pain relief whatsoever. It certainly hadn't felt controlled.

I then got that incredible feeling of amazement that a human being just arrived from inside me. I'm overwhelmed by how tiny he looks compared to his sisters. I can't actually do proper skin to skin as I'm still in a bra and tight top as I never had time to change!

The next few hours were a weird mixture of overwhelming joy to meet DS and total shock. I think my body went into shock as I was shaking uncontrollably and felt sick and dizzy. Adrenalin got me through the first few hours but when I was moved to the postnatal ward at 5am I tried to sleep but everytime I drifted off I would jolt awake thinking i was still in labour and totally panicked that another unbearable contraction was coming. I felt so awful that I burst into tears on DH and begged him not to go home to tell the girls at breakfast as planned. Thankfully I felt better by 8am and DH bought Carluccios almond croissants and coffee and we had a celebratory breakfast.

ShadyLadyT Wed 15-May-13 09:47:36

That's a fascinating birth story Arti, thanks for sharing it (especially for those of us who have never experienced similar). What I don't understand though is why the midwife who came in after 1am said she'd examine you in an hour instead of getting the anaesthetist for the epidural. I can't help thinking there's a mode of thought amongst midwives (one reads about and sees it a lot, on the wider board and on progs like OBEM) that they would just rather people did it without drugs - whether that's contrary to the mother's wishes or not. And I have to say it makes me furious. I realise you got to experience a drug free labour - are you glad it worked out that way or would you still rather have had the epidural? Anyway, I am so glad you both came out the other end (as it were), he looks absolutely beautiful!

Can't do catch up now as Stepmother is coming to stay in an hour. She is a retired midwife and we do not agree on even a single issue to do with childbirth grin

JamInMyWellies Wed 15-May-13 10:46:59

Arti I am so glad you shared that with us. Think it very much depends on the midwife. With DS1 was desperate for epidural after 24hrs of back labour finally got one then they wouldn't top it up as the wanted me to feel the contractions for pushing. With DS2 they blue lighted me from the MLU to hospital to give me my epidural only to find it was too late. So one set of midwives who wouldn't let me have one for ages and another who were happy to let me have one. I truly believes it depends on the midwife you get on the day.

But lovely to hear you are both home and settled. How delighted are the girls with their brother?

Indith Wed 15-May-13 10:48:09

bloody well done arti.

McKayz Wed 15-May-13 10:54:44

Well done Arti!! What do the girls make of their baby brother?

beans37 Wed 15-May-13 11:40:24

What a lovely story, Arti and well done you. I had echoes of that with both my births, ie got to 7cm v quickly with DD1 and they actually offered me an epidural, but by that stage I just wanted to get it done, so I chose not to have one. And with DD2 when I was in hospital they said they'd let me labour for an hour, then examine me (I was also v chatty - transition anyone???!) and I had DD2 within half an hour of that conversation. Although to be fair, she was a trainee midwife as they had no qualified ones available!!!

You are wonderwoman, well done you. xxx

beans37 Wed 15-May-13 11:40:33

PS Any name yet?

ZuleikaJambiere Wed 15-May-13 12:42:12

Beautiful story Arti, and well done you. Is anyone else reading 'ADVOCATE' in a Ross-from-friends-shouting-PIVOT-voice? wink I wish I could meet him for a snuggle, newborns are the best

DeidreBarlow Wed 15-May-13 13:10:31

Arti beautiful birth story, brought a tear to my eye! Although I'm hormonal and stressed about DS and pre school/nursery. But that's for another day

Huge congrats again, any name yet?

beans37 Wed 15-May-13 15:16:32

ZJ, that has made me laugh a lot. Friends is, I think, enormously underrated, as has been shown too much. But it was very very funny. At times. And I know cheesy, but I was/am still a fan.

Just done a 2 hour softplay session. Was lovely. I read my book for an hour, then a friend came and joined us with her son for an hour, so we had a gossip. She is lovely and makes me feel very settled and pleased I live here.

DB, what's the story? I hope you're ok?

I must go and clear up some dog shit from the garden. Such fun.

Rubena Wed 15-May-13 16:22:02

Nice story Arti. How did you remember all those timings! I especially loved the ending grin
You should have punched that midwife in the face. Clearly the type I despise.
Congrats again! thankswine

Rubena Wed 15-May-13 17:10:44

Oh God ZJ I missed that in your post.... YES! Hilarious! Friends is my all time favorite show!

Car on the way to recovery blush DH has sourced new doors from a braker to keep costs down, saving 750 there, plus taken the trim off himself and refurbished it (which car guy said impossible to remove without damaging, but dh used the kettle and steamed them off) and saved another 190 quid in trim. V pleased with his skills.

Vagolajahooli Wed 15-May-13 19:37:24

Thanks Arti, that was lovely. Well done you. Does me a little bit tempted. But wanting to give birth again is not really a reason to have a child.

By the by, the shaky, shock feeling is quite normal. I didn't have it with DS1 but I definitely had it with ds2. The midwife anticipated it and sorted me out by wrapping me up and getting me comfortable and drinking some (more) hot sweet tea. As to the not checking & not offering the epidural in the midwifes defence she may been concerned that either could slow your labour again as both an internal & epidural can slow things down. Indith will know more about this than moi.