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December 2012 - the sleep and poo thread (too much of one, not enough of the other)

(997 Posts)
PurplePidjin Sun 06-Jan-13 22:45:43


CODwidow Sun 06-Jan-13 22:52:46

Just marking

Secondsop Sun 06-Jan-13 22:54:14

Marking my place!

mamapo I am dead jealous of your expressing abilities. I can't get more than an ounce or maybe 40ml, whether by hand, pump, or a combination, A DAY (I.e. using whatever time I can in the day to express) and that's from both breasts. I know the baby is more efficient than me or a pump at getting out milk, but I wonder whether I have a rubbish letdown.

Thank you Pidj just checking in

Thanks pidj

Thanks mama well I manage 2oz a day (ish) so if I do that most days then I can tell DH to defrost 4oz and if ds wants more then do another 2oz. And so on. Hopefully as I won't be out of the house for more than 1 1/2 hrs he shouldn't need too much. I've only got about 6oz in the freezer atm. Oh and my pump does nothing do all mine is hand expressed confused

Dash has always pooed many times a day but the gaviscon has made him constipated and haven't had one all day. Rather dreading the next one

ellliebelle Sun 06-Jan-13 23:27:35

Just marking my place

Bellaboo123 Sun 06-Jan-13 23:29:13

Thanks pidj just checking in

FriendofDorothy Mon 07-Jan-13 00:15:59

Checking in.

Stacks Mon 07-Jan-13 00:17:39

Just checking in.

Not long woke up from a real sleep. DH had T for a nap for the first time ever, so I had the bed to myself and could just sleep without worrying about turning over etc. was only 2 hours but feel do much better. Also really nice to have DH a bit more confident about settling him now, tether than just handing him back after 2 mins saying he's hungry...

MaMaPo Mon 07-Jan-13 00:18:12

Ooh, shiny new thread.

Yes, I'm lucky expressing has gone well. Like everything else it's just luck of the draw, right? I wonder if it can change as supply becomes established.

Just woke up with such a painful right breast - last fed from it 8 hours ago shock and boy does it feel like it.

Marking please.

Ds slept for three hours I expect he would have gone longer if dd hasn't just burst into our room waking him up hmm

I express every day and that gives me about 120ml every two days so that's what ds has in a bottle from dp

Clarella Mon 07-Jan-13 01:50:19

oops I always post in wrong place!

funny how many of us work in social sector 'on the coal face' 

<longs for days of few poos> my son is a pooing machine at one month today  managed to squirt it over 2 meters away today. (is that normal?!) dh manned that one, I'm always prepared with the spare asda poo shield nappy smile

wow stacey all hand expressed? shock

dh finally had success with a bottle of ebm and gave me 4 hours sleep first time in 4 weeks  but didn't know how much, only gave 40ml - I'll tell him try the full 120ml next time. (I get that in one go - is that normal?? mind you I think I read it gradually increases?)

dh refuses to buy anything ever 'unnecessary' stuff but presented me with ds while announcing we need a ewan ..... do we really??!! I pointed out we have an ipod.apparently the oven fan helped this evening hmm

utopian99 Mon 07-Jan-13 02:33:06

clarella i"ve just done the same.. pidj thanks for swanky new Fred, frazzled brain not working!

spotty are breast shells the same as protectors/pads? Have been using boots own brand but they don't always managed for long or i need to change them.every 4 hours?
Might go off and play with my medela to find out how it works and how long to collect 4oz.

utopian99 Mon 07-Jan-13 02:35:16

Reposted since Posted on wrong thread:

Secret is good for me! (Partly cause I used to mouth off about people swamping the news feed with baby photos. Oops. )Well after my last post about 15 min feeds Oz has decided to make a point by going for 1.5hour mega-feeds this morning and again this afternoon! Assume this is growth spurt behaviour.. Currently passed out on my lap but I'm sure all this will change when i get him in his hammock as per usual. 

My boobs are leaking like taps - should i make the most of this an express & freeze for dh to use once a few more weeks have passed OR will this just ramp up production even more? Life or death decisions to be made i know.

No they basically catch any milk you leak so you can use it. I haven't ever used them though you might need to google!

MaMaPo Mon 07-Jan-13 04:23:59

This child! 1.5hours between feeds is not what we are aiming for!

EggsMichelle Mon 07-Jan-13 04:40:15

We are doing 1.5hr intervals for sleep, hardly seems worth sleeping, plus DH has gone nocturnal and I can hear him manically crashing about down stairs!

MaMaPo I working in a low secure forensic hospital, lots of chronics and treatment resistant patients, but the occasional young lad who knows Facebook too well!

Clarella Mon 07-Jan-13 04:43:51

utoptia you could express to ease them off but I was advised only for 10-15 mins in early days - I was initially told by one nurse in hospital to express for 20 mins both sidesor till they stopped dripping which did over stimulate them so then had to try and reduce it back . if you don't all that will happen is they hurt then they ease off as hormones signal its not needed - however might be wise to express a little ti avoid mastitis (this was all advice I was given 10 days in). was told to express in morning too when you've got the most milk.

after guzzling all day mine are like rocks right now, wondering if I can be arsed to express right now

SeymoreInOz Mon 07-Jan-13 06:09:57

Just checking in!

We're doing 1.5 hours too, last night was terrible. I woke up at 2am soaking wet, lying in a huge patch of milk! it must have been leaking out for ages, I think because I was lying on my side slightly squashing one boob! So as well as feeding every 90 mins I had to strip and remake our bed!

It's going to be 43 degrees tomorrow, we don't have air conditioning, I'm really worried about how DS will cope!

CODwidow Mon 07-Jan-13 07:19:02

Well dd had a good night fed 9-11 3:30-4:30 and ive just woke her do she can have a quick Feed before school run but typically ds1 was awake from 3ish with earache so looks like he may miss the first day back.

I've not tried expressing yet but may give it a go in the next few weeks, I'm liking the idea of dh doing a feed especially a night one smile

Well we had a bad night in the end. Ds woke at four and fussed and grunted until six when I had to get up then he fell asleep sad have to leave in fifty minutes to take dd to nursery and I'm exhausted! Is it legal to drive after only four hours of rubbish sleep and one coffee?!

PurplePidjin Mon 07-Jan-13 07:42:29

We got 11-4 but then he refused to sleep so we shared the wriggling. Not sure how I'm going to cope when we get a spare bed organised and I'm on my own for nights sad

Ethan fed at 11 then. 2.45 then 6.15. I feel refreshed today after a 3hr block of sleep. I even managed to get everyone up and in the car by 7.15 (children with breakfast on hand but still in pjs, except Ethan he was fed and dressed smile ) to take DH to work as we have a midwife appointment later so I need the car. Back in bed now, last lazy day with my boy, back to work tomorrow once big dcs are at school! sad

Sorry to hear about fussy babies last night!

We've had a horrible night. The gaviscon has blocked D's insides up completely an he hasn't pooed in 36 hours now and is obviously in pain. He won't be put down and Grizzles 50% of the time even when being cuddled.

ISpyPlumPie Mon 07-Jan-13 08:30:32

Just checking in. Honey - will pm you later about Facebook. Secret is good for me too!

Clarella Mon 07-Jan-13 08:39:02

another one with okish night here .... infacol??? there's not supposed to be any clinical evidence it works but I guess at same time how on earth do you test it as who knows uf babies go through phases etc? so sorry to hear about bad nights and wriggly fussy babies.I only got the fussing from 5am and I have a weird thing where even if I've not slept more than an hour or so I'm wide awake from 6. my mum's the same.

after earlier failures in previous weeks (despite ds having bottles in hospital) Dh's successful night expressed bottle really helped me as that chunk of 3 hours plus a random 2 later on as ds went 3 between feeds. we've got a good book called your baby week by week- it only really tells you what to expect in terms of poo, (which is wildly wide ranging at this point apparently!), mum's bleeding etc - it doesn't advocate any methods etc but suggests little things swaddling and how to and so on. it suggests trying an expressed bottle every 2 or 3 days in week 3 or 4 so that they get used to it but we may try each night if it goes that well.

George is one month today!

ellliebelle Mon 07-Jan-13 09:36:18

Stacks my dh is rubbish at settling ds sad although i actually think he just doesnt try jist tells me hes hungry and if i say he isnt he will say to ds 'i know you look ot but mummy says your not hungry' it really infuriates me sad

Midwife has discharged ds today jaundice has definately gone and he now weighs 9lb

And we had a good 6.40-10.30 in basket fed till 11ish and back in basket till 1.15 fed till 1.50 and back in basket till 4.15 fed till 4.40 back in basket 6.30 then fed and co-slept till 8.30ish

Clarella Mon 07-Jan-13 09:56:44

my Dh is usually convinced G is hungry. but that is probably my fault following an eve when about 14 days old and dh was doing burping in the eve between feeds and wanted to give me more time in bed. I believe he tried swaddling, bouncing, white noise (I didn't hear the screaming) then came into the bedroom with his top off and a yelling red baby saying 'I tried skin to skin but even that didn't work' and I pointed out he was probably just hungry. bless. he'd tried so hard! however now every winge is apparently hunger hmm

Why do I feel like I'm having the piss taken out of me? Jamie had whinged and cried and refused to sleep in his Moses basket since 4am. I put him down on his babygym and he's asleep in seconds! angry wishbone I'd known that when DP handed him over at 5am!

MaMaPo Mon 07-Jan-13 11:27:48

Glorious husband took baby just before 9am and I just woke up.

He goes back to work tomorrow sad sad sad

EggsMichelle Mon 07-Jan-13 11:41:42

it rials me when dh practically accuses me of denying my son food, lip smacking does not always mean he's hungry.

dh had also said he would take F this morning whilst i finished my sleep, however it is dh who is asleep on the sofa and im holding the baby angry

Clarella Mon 07-Jan-13 11:44:22

mama chocolate, crisps posh decaff coffee and celeb big bro getting me through..... banishes distant ideas of motherhood of floating round house baby in sling baking and cooking and making jam and sewing and listening to radio 4

I think the most important thing for tomorrow am for you is to try bad get a shower before dh goes to work - I'm soooo glad I managed this morning!

I think George was so cramped and tight in my womb as over due he doesn't like his feet cramped into the sling newborn holds?? he had wonky feet at birth from being squashed sad I'm thinking a ring sling might work better.

MaMaPo Mon 07-Jan-13 11:48:31

Glorious husband now gone out for coffee and pain au chocolate. Can I reiterate sad sad sad re tomorrow?

right - resolve to shower before he leaves tomorrow - thanks, clarella!

Stacks Mon 07-Jan-13 12:07:16

Has anyone gone to any breastfeeding support groups or anything? I'm having some trouble with T's latch - he's probably not getting his milk as efficiently as he could be, and my nipples feel like they're on fire when he latches on. He's producing the right number if wet/dirty nappies, but I really want to get it sorted.

There's a "breastfeeding group" at Ikea tomorrow morning, but I'm not sure it's a help group or a social group. There's also a LLL group on Friday, but again it doesn't seem like a help group - the sessions run as a course covering 'benefits of breastfeeding' etc.

Thinking of phoning a helpline or asking for help makes me cry for what seems like no reason. Feeling like a failure maybe?

Oh, emilyeggs you asked on last thread about CS swelling. I've still got a large sort of 'pouch' of swelling just above my CS cut. You can see it and feel it through my clothes. I hope it's swelling and not permanent. My stomach has gone quite flat already, so the CS swelling sticks out further than my tummy sad

PurplePidjin Mon 07-Jan-13 12:17:13

Clarella, if it's a stretchy just pop his feet out from under the bottom rail (assuming you tie the same way i do) and pop socks/bootees on over his babygrow. R is in babygrow with vest and trousers over ready to do a supermarket shop, and I'll pop him in the sling with hat and socks straight from the car seat smile i wouldn't cook with him in it because of the heat, though can crochet while feeding from the left though

Dp's the opposite, tries to buy me time to relax when the only solution is boob! R is easy in that respect, though

PurplePidjin Mon 07-Jan-13 12:20:16

Stacks, i love love love the bf group at my local children's centre. Moral support is invaluable, even if there's no "expert" to talk to. I'd say definitely go. I can't wait for mine tomorrow, have a feeling it might turn out to be a bit of a lifeline (it's mw-run) under my current circs!

Afrodizzywonders Mon 07-Jan-13 13:15:16

Last night was rough. K would not nap between 12-3 only wanted to be held, then it was 2 hourly feeds and back up at 6 am to look after toddler........second time round this feels harder, just can't relax as looking after 2 sad

Just got home from dd's first day at nursery. I went and had a coffee with a friend whilst she was there. Saw Lawrence Fox, as you do wink in exhausted and haven't had lunch yet. Ds screamed the whole time during drop off/pick up sad

Clarella Mon 07-Jan-13 13:47:48

...... dithered and fretted all morning over woodwards gripe water which had resolved to try now a month (worried about e numbers stupid google) couldn't stand the whimpering and boob shouting so popped half dose in - G coughed and I thought I'd choked him and stopped crying instantly .... 2 hours later happy as can be and just spent30 mins n his play mat staring at skylights (fave activity). co incidence????

I tried that pidj! but pre gripe water..... no wouldn't cook but was part of the stepford mum dream....

stacks definitely go along and yes to helpline - it helps loads. tonnes of lansiloh too.

cs sausage swelling here too - though I think today first day post section that there's hardly any pain. I panicked a bit and posted in child birth and had loads of reassurances it would go eventually. think a combo of fluid and lots of swollen scar tissue. its a little better 4 wks later but is visible as my tummy has gone right down now. I did use aboob tube for a few days to compress it - helped a bit but then I had a flare up after doing too much and it hurt. postnatal physio
said if it feels ok it can help. also gently pull tummy muscles in when lifting baby if u can remember.

Clarella Mon 07-Jan-13 13:48:23

envy spotty

yay for new thread!

afro That sounds tough, hope you have a better day today and that the LOs will go easy on you!

mama My DP has been great too and he's going back to work on Wednesday, really not looking forward to it sad sad sad

First time mums, what do you do at home during the day with your baby? I'm not used to just sitting at home so feel like I should get out and do stuff but at the same time I'm really tired and probably won't have the energy to leave the house every day (especially if it's raining like today). It's fine with DP still at home but I'm worried I'll get lonely and go a bit mad when alone all day with the baby. DD is very cranky so I can hardly put her down when at home. She does like the carrier but every time I sit down she starts to cry (unless she's asleep). I don't know how I'm gonna stay sane the next months/years sad

Any idea when we roughly might get our lives back?? confused

Clarella Mon 07-Jan-13 13:58:26

oh <hugs> afro - I couldn't imagine doing this with more than 1

Afro I feel the same it's really hard! Hoping for a better night tonight all round!

Clarella Mon 07-Jan-13 14:11:13

peony - no idea really but I think in the early days try not to set goals too high. maybe find a good box set too ;) I'm seeing today as a tester day, where might be good to feed, if there's any opportunity to make lunch etc., what's easy to make etc. definitely trying to be washed and dressed before dh goes to work has helped though don't think I managed teeth yet have a look on internet and local papers etc for classes you can sign up to in a few weeks which will help and even setting challenge of going to local park or museum or something in a few weeks? I'm feeling its about keeping personal routines like brushing teeth as much as possible, not massively linked to times but that they just happen, and then developing habits eg attempting to go out somewhere. then when you do have more of a social baby life it's just a bit easier iykwim? tiny building blocks that don't really matter if don't happen when baby is growth spurting or poorly and you're back to square 1.

ironically it's how I start every September with the kids I teach, autistic or mainstream - routines and habits and slowly it all comesttogether (took till may last year but we still got there!!!)

Secondsop Mon 07-Jan-13 14:14:49

Hello all. A bit of an interrupted night here not because of Z (who slept well between feeds) but because we're trying more formula to get his weight developing which means I have to express after every bottle because I want to keep my supply going. But he's sleeping a bit more in the carrycot now, hurrah hurrah.

We tried the Dr Brown's bottle today - a marked improvement in his post-feed comfort even though I didn't use infacol or burp him during the feed.

peony I still haven't got used to what to do during the day. While Z is still small, it's a fair amount of watching TV and cuddling and talking to him. Havent really got into going out and about every day yet althoug now tjay a few more in my NCT group have had their babies we're planning some meet ups. He's now getting more alert so we're doing more playing and talking and encouraging eye contact. I'm wildly lucky that my husband mostly works from home (well the work is very much squeezed in around other things at present) so he can help with laundry and bins and holding the baby while I do things like shower and cook and eat.

Peony I thought I'd feel like you before DP went back (last Wed). But for now there's no time to get bored. Feeding, winding, changing and the bare minimum of housework take every second before DP gets home.

That said, I have a trip to the Trafford centre planned with my sister tomorrow (little scared of managing the pram in shops), a friend coming with her baby for lunch Wed and Jamie's tongue tie appt has finally come through for Thurs. Think I'll need all day Friday in bed!

WLmum Mon 07-Jan-13 14:26:01

stacks i phoned the bf helpline last week or so, spoke to super helpful non judgemental lady. If you don't like what they say just disregard it. Not at all a failure to ask for support - quite the opposite.

clarella I wanted to ask you all for recommendations for slings. I got a freedom ring sling for dd2 but never got on with it - didn't feel confident enough to let go, worried about head position and just never that comfy. Am thinking about a moby this time. What do you guys use?

We had quite a good night too - T actually spent 2 decent periods in her Moses basket, then DH got up with dd1+2 and got dd1 ready for school so dd3 and I didn't get up til nearly 8! His shift work does have the occaisional benefit !

WLmum Mon 07-Jan-13 14:35:20

I would like to join fb group too - but am a bit dense and can't see how to pm?! Is it because I'm on my phone?

For those using gaviscon - it worked wonders for dd1 but did bung her up so she was prescribed lactulose too which seemed to get a good balance.

Hello again, it's been ages, i've been lost in time with baby C but just spent the last couple of days catching up - so reassuring to hear of other having the same issues.
I've been inspired by you lot to buy a Ewen and try out infacol for his gasiness.
honey i'm watching with interest how you're getting on with infant gaviscon - i suspect C has reflux too but can't see Dr til thursday as it's not deemed urgent so can't come by a prescription yet. Has D pooed yet today or is he still bunged up?

WLmum if on the mobile site you'll need to go to your inbox, do new message and type in the recipient. There's no button to click to automatically send a pm!

We're off to the midwife this afternoon. Not sure if they'll discharge us when we're still waiting for the results from the hospital. confused

Nope D still hasn't pooed and is miserable and quite clearly in pain. I feel so helpless. The gaviscon did wonders for the reflux symptoms but it isn't worth the misery if him not pooing. Spoke to dr this morning who said to stop the gaviscon for the min - hoping that having given his oesophages a rest for a couple of days might halt things for a bit. Been recommended to ask for ranitidine instead of gaviscon if he does need anything as its better or bf as doesn't need to be mixed with water/milk to get it down.
Dr also said can give us lactulose if still poo in a couple of days but hoping we can sort it before then. He suggested mixing some water with some milk in a bottle but he didn't say how much or anything. I just want to make him feel better

sounds horrid honey, it's so awful seeing them suffering sad. hope rantidin is some improvement

Clarella Mon 07-Jan-13 16:36:02

wl I think the caboo is very easy, (and in mainstream shops) but depends what u want it for - we've a boba 3g for dh which is great for out n about but it's too hard on my scar at mo. g goes in that with snow suit on! we got that as itll go till quite old and like a back pack for hiking etc. has attachment for bag on shoulder and foot holds fir toddler feet. I wanted to learn to wrap but ds has other ideas currently! a soft mei tai like the connector can be nice indoors (caboo a cheats wrap but like connector but front hold only, connector does do back when they're older) you could see if there's a sling meet near by or try posting on 'natural mama's' - lots of sling mad women there to advise! I'm going to see if I can hire something for a bit for this one. want to look into ring slings as may be what this wee onewants.

Clarella Mon 07-Jan-13 16:37:02

humorous hugs honey and also prune. reflux so tough x

utopian99 Mon 07-Jan-13 16:51:46

peony I had a day between Christmas break and dh paternity leave starting and it went surprisingly fast! Mostly doing admin chores, tax return, registration appointments, filing a late planning application revision in between Oz's naps, and then watching tv during feeds..
Once he goes back again on the 17th I'm planning to spend sleeping breaks developing my own practice (out of necessity due to 'disagreement' with previous employer after I got pregnant,) doing exercise dvds and hopefully joining some local baby/mummy groups. Our NCT lot are having a reunion on the 20th so hoping there might be some activities in there too. Can you tell I don't like sitting still either?!

fandango, if it's not rude, where are you? We're in south manc., and I noticed you mentioned the Trafford Centre, which is why i ask..

wlmum to PM on phone you need to go to the inbox (at the top of each page uunder the mn logo.) that then has an option to create a new message.

Sorry to hear of bunged up babies.. Had a very sleepless night last night but major feeding and of course Oz's now fast asleep and I don't feel at all sleepy! Mw came today though, and he's almost 9lb from a birth weight of 8lb 7oz. grin

Utopian I'm in Wigan so it's only about 30 mins away. I'm hoping Trafford will be okay as the kids are back in school tomorrow.

minipie Mon 07-Jan-13 17:18:18

Just marking place on the new thread as I can hear DD waking up...

MaMaPo Mon 07-Jan-13 17:47:56

Hallo to all.

Peony, excellent question - I have no idea what my day will end up looking like. Next Monday will be the first day of 'normality' - husband at work all day and the inlaws gone back to Aus. I imagine I will fill my day with baby wrangling, some baby/NCT mother groups, things like that. When I have a good awake day, probably off to museums or something. Frequent walks in the park - hopefully daily. I'm quite looking forward to getting at least myself into a routine, and then seeing whether Little C will join in. I feel like I have no idea if she has a natural routine or not brewing, as we are so chaotic every day we'd not notice.

Enjoyed my last day off with my husband - out for lunch with baby in sling (we have the ErgoBaby, and he wore it for the first part of the outing and then I wore it, as we did a bit of shopping and he wanted to try clothes on). It's worth fiddling a lot with the fit, as the first time I wore it I was devastated at the waste of money (hurt my shoulders and back terribly) but today it was fine for a good couple of hours.

Little C went 5 hours between feeds today! Now, if only we could get that at nighttime, not daytime...

Honey - sending little Dash good pooing vibes - being bunged up is such a horrible sensation, I hope it resolves soon.

Clarella, I'm a month post-CS and definitely have the bump above the scar. The rest of my tummy is surprisingly flat (and i have gone below my pre-pregnancy weight, go figure). I am assuming it'll take a while to go down, and once I have my 6 week checkup I'm hoping to start some postnatal pilates.

ISpyPlumPie Mon 07-Jan-13 18:31:28

Willyou - I'm in Wigan too! Hope you have a nice time at the Trafford Centre. Don't know if they still do it, but on Tuesdays the cinema there had a show that you could take babies to. It was a grown-up film (but nothing scary/inappropriate) with the volume a bit quieter than normal (though any baby-related noise was fine!) Might not be what you've got planned for tomorrow, but could be something to do another day.

CODwidow Mon 07-Jan-13 18:45:10

Well first 'normal day' went well, did the school run, managed some housework then fed Keira popped to my mums for coffee and then back home to sort the ds's wardrobe. Another quick feed and back to the school. I find it hard not having anything to do so always plan my next week the week before giving myself 3 'social' days and 2 with nothing on.

I'm hoping to find some groups to join as all my friends have older children or live miles away.

We have a ring sling and I find it really comfy and baby loves it, guaranteed silence!smile

utopian Wow, you're very productive! Today's been the first day I've spent entirely at home (not even a small walk around the block) and I feel quite cabin feverish. My cousin came round earlier and DP has been at home most of the day too so it's not like I've been alone. It's just that DD wants to be held most of the time at home so I feel like I can't do much (apart from surf the net with one free hand), which will drive me crazy in the long run. At least when we're out she normally sleeps in her pram so I can concentrate on other things, which is why I'm so keen to get out every day.

mama No sign of a routine here either - I'm gonna try to follow clarella's advice and at least get myself showered before DP leaves for work. Hopefully everything else will fall into place naturally with time. I'm also hoping to start postnatal pilates soon but not sure when I'll get a chance to do it!

Clarella Mon 07-Jan-13 19:35:19

previous post was supposed to say humungous not humorous ....

Bellaboo123 Mon 07-Jan-13 19:36:30

Cod we do the same as you 3 social and 2 stay at home keeps my sanity!

Took Aurelia for her weigh in - shes now 7lb 13oz up from birth weight of 5lb 14oz

Popped I to work today - already asking me when I'm coming back hmm

Honey - hope things get moving for Dash

I'm having a wobble with the breastfeeding someone give me a kick up the bum! I'm really tired and wish he's just leave me alone for five minutes blushsad

clarella I liked humorous hugs!

spotty you're doing so so well with the bfing. Can your DP give him a bottle of expressed so you can have some time to yourself? I did giving D a bottle of expressed makes him go longer than just boob as he takes more at a time that way. Could you sort a bottle then have a bath and some sleep for a few hours?

Have about 120ml expressed dp prefers to do middle of night feed?! I'm just about to get into bed but I can hear ds shouting its been forty minutes since I last fed him. Got another early start tomorrow too for his hearing screening (9:30 40 minute drive)...it just seems to be getting harder rather than easier! Sorry for moaning blush

CODwidow Mon 07-Jan-13 19:52:52

spotty just wanted to say it does get easier and I know it doesn't feel it right now but just all of a sudden it eases and the feeds are quicker and less frequent. Your doing so well already maybe just take it a feed at a time at the mo.

I'd forgotten how lonely it can become with a newborn iyswim?

CODwidow Mon 07-Jan-13 20:08:57

But saying that I am also wobbling slighty as Keira's oral thrush hasn't cleared and although my right side feels better, my left nipple is agony and it has now moved into my breast. Doctors tomorrow and hoping to get it sorted.

WLmum Mon 07-Jan-13 20:24:14

spotty I felt like that a couple of days ago after what felt like a whole day and night of constant feeding. I feel much better after a good night last night (hope I haven't just jinxed it). One of the things that keeps me at it is that even if all else fails, the boob always comforts and calms - what if the bottle is finished?

Re the sling, I mainly want it for wearing around the house, particularly during evening fussiness that helpfully coincides with older dds bedtimes. Can I bf in a moby?

Clarella Mon 07-Jan-13 20:25:48

spotty you are doing well - would it be end of the world to try a bit of formula if it saves sanity and sleep?

oh dear cod - when I thought I had start of thrush I felt really down - hope you get sorted at docs and its less painful soon.

fab weight gain bella!

even though bits were hard I've enjoyed first day totally by self - though shower first thing def helped!! make sure includes teeth before lunch tomorrow!

Thanks everyone. Ds doesn't like formula hmm I think it is just being tired that makes it so much harder!

Clarella Mon 07-Jan-13 20:34:17

wl there might be videos online on bf in moby - think you can in caboo (anyone confirm?)

try posting here http://www.naturalmamas.co.uk/forum/index.php

sorry can't get brackets in right place

Yes caboo you can not tried it yet though

Afrodizzywonders Mon 07-Jan-13 20:42:43

Spotty - I know exactly how you feel. But honestly, this will pass quickly and the feeding will settle, the first 6 weeks I found are the hardest (I bf my DS for 2 years and didn't set out to at all coming from a family who feel very awkward about it). Most people don't get through the first 6 weeks as its a flaming baptism of sore nipples and total demand on you but believe me, it gets soooooooooo much easier, no need to sterilise bottles and it was a bloody God send for placating baby quickly. I never got on with expressing at all, and DS totally rejected taking a bottle, but did eventually take a cup which gave me my freedom back a bit.

WLmum Mon 07-Jan-13 20:46:03

Fab thanks clarella

spotty. I def remember saying the same thing with dd1! I think often it does actually get harder for a bit as dcs get a bit more demanding and birth high hormones settle down and give way to knackeredness. It absolutely does get easier though, and more rewarding. I think they start to smile just as we think we've had enough, and one of those beauties suddenly makes it all ok again.

PurplePidjin Mon 07-Jan-13 20:46:13

Things are definitely getting better at 7 weeks - I'm more relaxed and able to read his cues. I know there's an end to the evening grot and that he'll sleep 4-6 hours after it. I'm also healed from the battering birth gives!

MaMaPo Mon 07-Jan-13 21:00:00

Good luck to everyone who needs it with bf. I'm having a rocky time with supply at the moment - little C has been feeding erratically (v frequently last night, v infrequently today) and my breasts don't know what's what. Think I will visit baby cafe on Weds to ask the mw.

I'm pretty sure we're getting the first smiles now. They're astonishing! Turn me into a gooey wreck!

Well I'm back from zumba and monumentally knackered. DH gave Ethan his first bottle of expressed milk. It was a success eventually after 10 minutes screaming and some odd pulled faces glad I can go out for an hour and they're alright.

I absolutely did not nearly stay home as I didn't want to leave ds, no siree

Oh and we've finally been signed off by the midwives. And Ethan now weighs 8lb 8oz so all this feeding is doing some good.

Sorry to hear others are having problems. As long as baby is fed it doesn't matter his it happens, don't beat yourselves up about any of it.

We probably won't get any smiles until ten weeks sad

WLmum Mon 07-Jan-13 21:23:56

Well done*stacey*.

spotty it will fly by, just keep telling yourself it will get better! Will ds sleep in pram or carrier - can u send DH out with him sometime so I can catch a break? Treat yourself to a pedicure I say - one scant hour of pampering does wonders.

I've just been watching moby wrap videos on you tube. Man I love t'internet!

Bellaboo123 Mon 07-Jan-13 22:05:10

Spotty keep you're chin up you're doing great and have helps us all out loads with great advice! smile

Aw Spotty everything seems worse when you're tired. I have no advice as we're ffing now but <enormous hugs> to you thanks

Honey j's all bunged up to (40hours and counting) I feel so sorry for him as he's obviously in pain. I've switched him to aptamil easy digest. Will the doctor give you lactulose for him?

<waves to ispy > did you have your baby in Wigan? I think you went a couple of weeks earlier than me (I was in 15-18th). I thought they were really good.

PurplePidjin Mon 07-Jan-13 22:21:55

We're not getting many, and they're quite faint, at 7 weeks Spotty. Lots of happy gurgles though confused

Secondsop Mon 07-Jan-13 22:35:11

No proper smiles here yet (will be 6 weeks on Thursday). My mum said it'll take 3 months! Is she wrong, or was I just a moody baby?

Went to a restaurant for dinner with husband, mum and little Z. It all went well although nappy change was a trial with no proper changing facility plus I forgot my change mat so ended up changing him on the changing bag on the closed loo seat (it all looked spotlessly clean...).

ISpyPlumPie Mon 07-Jan-13 23:29:57

Willyou - I had N at home, but DS1 was born in Wigan Infirmary and I was pretty impressed. The community mws who I dealt with this time were fab too - think we're pretty lucky round here.

Spotty <hugs>. My experiences of feeding are incredibly similar to Afro's - DS1 was a milk monster of the highest order who stedfastly refused to drink from any vessel other than me and it was absolutely relentless at first. I can't pinpoint exactly when, but gradually it did improve and I realised that I was spending less of the day feeding. Both the frequency and length of feeds reduced, and it just didn't seem so all-consuming any more. At about four months he (finally!) started to drink ebm from a cup meaning I could do such exciting things as get my hair done (my roots were an absolute sight to behold by this point).

In the end, it just became a small part of day-to-day life and I fed him until he was two and half (went back to work p/t when he was one and was it fine just feeding early morning/evening on work days). If someone had told me at the start how long I would feed him for I would have had them committed, but it just changed so much. Not saying that feeding to toddlerhood is for everyone or should be the aim, just trying to show how much it does adjust iyswim.

It sounds as if F is thriving - if that carries on through bf, ff or a combination it doesn't matter and you are doing a fantastic job either way.

Just thought everyone would like to know we have just had the most epic poo explosion - took out his vest, sleepsuit, a muslin, a cushion and his change mat. He's just had a bath then weed on mummy. Daddy got pooed on so is in the shower. Dear god, it looked like the Somme.

grin glad he's feeling better now honey that sounds epic!

Honey grin

Thanks ISpy hopefully we will get there

Seconds I was told they smile at 46 ish weeks so although ds is six weeks old now he's only 41+2...

Secondsop Tue 08-Jan-13 01:30:12

Ah spotty so Z might not smile for another couple of weeks then? He'd be 43+4.

honey that poo sounds EPIC. Z poos every other day at the moment but on each second day I'm on tenterhooks in case he hangs on longer than 2 days.

Can I ask a question of ladies who express? I'm starting to get somewhere with hand-expressing (the pump is yet to justify its cost-per-use ratio) and would like to start freezing a little stash; I am mixed-feeding but thought it would be good to save some breast milk for if, for example, Z is ill and more breastmilk would help him. Have any of you bought freezer bags and if so, what brand would you recommend? Lansinol has mixed reviews of people either saying theyre amazing or saying they leak. Medela seems to have good reviews but is pricier.

Bellaboo123 Tue 08-Jan-13 01:30:57

Yay Honey grin

MaMaPo Tue 08-Jan-13 02:51:35

Honey - hooray! I bet he feels so bloody relieved!

Seconds - for what it's worth, I use medela bags and they're fine. Disclaimer: I have frozen exactly one (1) bag and haven't defrosted it yet. smile

Clarella Tue 08-Jan-13 03:56:59

Go Dash! great news honey!

interesting about the 46 wks smile; we're sure G gave a definite smile after bath and when daddy pulling his routine silly faces and he was exactly 46 wks yesterday smile

so maybe this is his 6wks growth spurt??? (due to 2 wks over cooked in womb?)

ebm bottle epic fail due to dh not bothering to wind him cos he dropped off - puked then cried then needed book anyway. this baby needs winding!!!

I use the lansinoh bags and haven't had a problem. I keep them stood up though when not frozen

Ds hasn't pooed for over 24 hours (after usually going at every feed)!

He's currently having the noisiest feed ever confused

WLmum Tue 08-Jan-13 04:35:33

Will this feed ever end? To make up for last nights success t is having none of her basket tonight and has roped her big sisters into helping the night fly by - they both have coughs/colds and have been in our bed in tears. So desperate to lie down.

EggsMichelle Tue 08-Jan-13 06:24:51

Loosing the will to live. F screamed all day yesterday, has woken me every hour for a feed, vomited with every feed (some times multiple vomits), pissed all over himself and only gained 5oz in 10days. Why has he suddenly become the devil child at 4wks? He won't let me put him down, he is refusing to go in his chair (which he was sleeping in for hours at a time last week). And to top it off, DH read my post yesterday moaning about him and he got upset, he's sleeping even less than me and has moved to the sofa. I feel like running away, I'm in need of a lot of reassurance right now cause I don't feel that I am doing anything right sad

utopian99 Tue 08-Jan-13 07:02:00

eggs sending you hugs and I'm sure it will.get better. I had another poor me episode tonight at midnight, O has been on epic feeding since mid afternoon but just Will Not Stop. Had a bag night for sleep the night before and then tonight just wanted to feed incessantly, but making incessant noise and wriggling throughout.

Dh has kept trying to settle him and give me a break but it's impossible with the feeding and as he's not yet two weeks a bottle of expressed milk is still early as i don't want to risk nipple confusion.

I miss terribly time just able to curl up with dh, and i'm still bleeding and waiting for stitches to heal so we can't do anything 'marital', which i also miss as i find it great stress relief and bonding between us. I love O totally but today has been really hard.

MaMaPo Tue 08-Jan-13 07:03:45

Oh Michelle. That sounds tough. Could he be having a growth spurt? It's so hard to work this stuff out sometimes a lot of the time. I did post on FB asking my friends if they knew where I could download the instruction manual for babies but get weren't very forthcoming.

As for your husband - time for an honest chat? One helpful thing my husband and I were told by other new parents was that a baby is like throwing a grenade into your relationship. Since then we made a pact to look for, recognise and label what we call 'grenade moments' or 'grenade days' when we find ourselves being angry or snippy of taking something (usually tiredness or confusion or frustrations) out on the other person. To look at my husband and say - sorry, it's been a very grenade night. - feels like an easy way to apologise.

What a load of waffle. I guess I'm saying that there are lots of reasons to be angry at our partners at the moment. This shut is tough. But it will pass.

WL - hope you got some sleep.

MaMaPo Tue 08-Jan-13 07:05:45

Accidental self-censorship! This shit is tough! I came over all kiwi.

Sorry for all the crappy nights sad ours was ok but not great. I have to be out the house in an hour and have a headache plus ds just projectile vomited all over my bed.

Having a baby is a big strain on a relationship it does get easier though. Dp knows to take all my snippy comments on the chin as its just because I'm tired b

WLmum Tue 08-Jan-13 08:31:03

Oh eggs you poor thing. As mama said, adding a baby is such a massive strain and adjustment for a relationship. Lack of sleep skews your (and dhs) perspective. Lo could be having a growth spurt, or feeling a little under the weather. I know it is so so hard but lo is not trying to be difficult - I have had to remind DH of this several times, so do try not to take it personally. I'm sure it won't be long before lo goes back to being an angel.
Perhaps try talking to DH - tell him you know it's hard for him as well as for you, but you need sometimes to offload on mm as you don't get to go to work etc and chat with others. Maybe plan a treat for you both ready for when lo settles down. A nice walk and pub lunch usually works for us.
Big hug.

Clarella Tue 08-Jan-13 08:44:45

eggs that does sound tough, big hugs. I can't add to any of the excellent advice above - I like the grenade analogy . it will get easier, just try to keep remembering that.

I'm a bit of a radio 4 fan (kept me sane ish during art degree) - there's a big thing on how hard early days of motherhood is on today - might be a phone in not sure. might help some of us if we can hear it above the screaming xx

PurplePidjin Tue 08-Jan-13 08:53:27

Michelle, that sounds like the rougher edge of things, can you contact your gp or hv team for some support? I think 3-5 weeks have been the hardest so far. You're over the birth enough to expect to cope but not quite fit enough to keep up (even with my long but straightforward one!); you're massively sleep deprived; and there seems to be no end in sight with the crying. I'm by no means perfect or getting it right here, but R is getting easier to look aftef - I'm learning what different cries mean, how he likes to be held etc and he's sleeping longer - 6 hours 11-5 last night, then 6-8 after a feed

Hang in there brew

MaMaPo Tue 08-Jan-13 08:57:55

Pidj, I am looking at those sleeping hours with wonderment and hope. Is little R 7 weeks now? Could I dare to hope for a 6 hour sleep in 2 weeks' time?!

Last night was probably the best yet (after the awful one the night before) - only 1 feed between 12 and 7. Amazing. Now my boobs are killing me.

Clarella Tue 08-Jan-13 09:22:39

ditto mama - and yes reading your post again eggs it does sound like something else going on with your little one, try and get his checked out x

WLmum Tue 08-Jan-13 09:28:20

clarella I'm a r4 fan too, not that I get to listen much as big dds complain but will check out and record that program. Thanks for the tip!

Stacks Tue 08-Jan-13 09:41:35

Spotty I've been having major wobbles over bf these last couple if days. Loads if tears and guilt and stress. I seriously hope going to this breastfeeding group this morning helps. I don't want to express or use formula, but sometimes it's just so hard when he's screaming but won't latch on, last night he was spitting out milk while sucking his fists, smacking his lips and screaming. I calmed him a hundred times, but every time I brought him back to the breast he'd cry again.

DH is trying his hardest to say its ok, it's not my fault, it will get better etc. but the only thing I could think is that I have to solve this problem, I'm the solution, so my fault or not it still feels like my fault sad

That turned into a bit of a me post... You're not alone in struggling though. How old is your LO? We're 2 weeks today, and it's getting so much harder each day. There has to be a point soon when on gets easier.

Need to get ready to go out to this group. Today will be the first day were out of bed the house before midday.

utopian99 Tue 08-Jan-13 09:42:57

clarella planning on listening too - is it today's women's hour?

pidj can i book in for those sleeping patterns??

WLmum Tue 08-Jan-13 10:00:01

stacks I always feel all the responsibility too. The what to expect books should have a massive chapter on maternal guilt!

Bfing is really hard - we all think because it's 'natural' it should be easy. Clearly it's not - if all our posts aren't enough proof, there wouldn't be all the support groups etc if it was easy. Ime it's hard to get going, but once it clicks into place, it is easy and lovely. It's just being able to get past the tough bits. Please don't beat yourself up - you are being a marvellous mummy as you are trying your very vest to do the best for your lo.

MaMaPo Tue 08-Jan-13 10:46:35

Or thing the NcT session on breastfeeding emphasised is that mums are great at it - if there are problems, it's because baby doesn't know what to do and needs to be taught. I am eternally lucky that bfing has been relatively easy for me - does the above idea make sense to you others? Would it assuage the guilt at all?

MyDaydream Tue 08-Jan-13 11:10:12

Finally made time to check in, spent four days in hospital post birth and have spent the rest of the time staring at my baby, have had no interest in anything else. I'm exhausted, really not looking forward to DP going back to work, he's been amazing during night feeds when Elijah won't settle because he just wants more food.
stacks I gave up breastfeeding in hospital with Elijah screaming in pain before every feed because his head hurt from the forceps, and me sobbing because it just wasn't working and I felt so bad. I'm expressing now with two formula feeds thrown in, and I'm enjoying him so much more because I'm not dreading every feed now.

Stacks ds is six weeks but I didn't start feeding him until he was a week and a half. He's just had his newborn hearing screening and all was fine smile

Afrodizzywonders Tue 08-Jan-13 12:13:14

Has that programme been on radio 4.

Had a better night, K slept 10-2am and then fed for over an hour before I managed to get her back in the Moses and then I tried a heartbeat sound app on my iPad next to her.....and she woke up at 6.30am only drawback was I lay there awake listening to the bloody thing slowly freaking out thinking....I should be asleep!

EggsMichelle Tue 08-Jan-13 12:51:45

Thank you ladies for all the support, this board is the most supportive place. F saw the Hv yesterday who concluded he has a temper hmm and was perfectly healthy. I have bought gripe water today in the hope that will improve the situation (why the hell does it not come with a syringe?) and some cartons of aptimil to try an evening feed.

I am very passive aggressive and DH lacks common sence, which hasn't been a problem for us in the past as I just get on with managing our lives for the both of us. Unfortunately I have to now rely on DH to get things done, but rather than telling him what to do I have just been hostile when things aren't done. We have had a chat, and I have promised to tell him what's bothering me, and he will deal with it. He isn't sleeping on the sofa due to use, it's because he can't sleep in the same room as F, he gets fixated on listening to his breathing, and if he doesn't sleep he can't help me in the day.

Had an ice cold shower, took the car to the garage and had a nap and feeling less hopeless now, sleep deprivation is a very evil thing. F also appears more settled today, currently falling asleep on my boob.

EggsMichelle Tue 08-Jan-13 13:01:18

Stacks that behaviour sounds like F last night, how did the group go? Did they give any advice?

utopian99 Tue 08-Jan-13 13:32:37

stacks hope the group helped? We are lucky in that bfing seems to have more or less clicked but O still has moments where I end up feeding hopeless; yesterday he just fed for hours but got overtired so was pushing his own head away with his fists and wriggling which then made me feel awful for not understanding the problem. I think no matter what we'll always feel guilty as parents for things which are not our fault. I feel guilty for feeling tired (despite this being down to functioning on 3 hours sleep in 24), and keep apologising to dh who then apologises to me for not being able to bf too!

Roll on week 6+, from what others have said there is hope!

pmgkt Tue 08-Jan-13 13:50:16

For those worried about lack of poo...don't. It's not uncommon for breast fed babies to only poo once or twice a week, and this is because your milk doesn't have much waste to it, it just gets used by your Lo.

Edward is doing part and part, he has a bottle of formula at bedtime and one in the morning, he is happy taking them, and I do the other feeds. He is only just over 2 weeks so quite early to start him but he is then sleeping for 5 and a half hours so we are all happy.

Emily, yes you do get a lump above your scar it does go down but after my last one I found that it was always a bit lumpy cos of the scar tissue, but I didn't do many sit ups to help either. How are you feeling otherwise.

PurplePidjin Tue 08-Jan-13 13:52:40

Yes, 7 weeks yesterday. It's by no means a given, but even badly sleeping older babies sleep better than newborns!

8lb 4.5oz this morning at clinic <proud>

CODwidow Tue 08-Jan-13 14:48:37

eggs you have just described my relationship and my behaviour. Dh and I always fall out at times when I need to rely on him but I have made an effort to talk to him this time and it does seem to have helped

CODwidow Tue 08-Jan-13 14:50:48

So been to the gp and I now gave antibiotics and Keira has a gel for her mouth so hopefully the thrush will begin to improve. My left breast actually feels as If someone has grated my nipple and set it on fire!

COD poor you sad I feel bad for moaning now! Hope it improves soon for you

EggsMichelle Tue 08-Jan-13 15:48:54

thats good COD you have treatments, can you put something topical on your nipple to sooth it?

i have managed to stop F from screaming since 11.30 with a combination of feeding and entertainment (funny noises and faces), he has only slept for 30mins, but i managed to eat my lunch in that time!!

This is hard work, but no where near as mentally draining as constant screaming.

Afrodizzywonders Tue 08-Jan-13 16:52:40

COD - sounds really really painful sad. I hope it clears up double quick.

Did anyone listen to the radio programme on woman's hour? It was pretty sobering!

emilyeggs Tue 08-Jan-13 17:08:10

Found you, yay I'm home at last.
Quick question, anyone else who had a c section have bad swelling in there legs after? Mine look like those things that spin around in a kebab house blush

CODwidow Tue 08-Jan-13 17:17:44

Thanks everyone, don't feel bad spotty I think the majority of us are having some sort of issues at the mo and everyone's is just as justified as the next.

Well Keira has slept for 5 hrs straight today and is now awake and very happy to just lie in her basket so today has been a good day so far in terms of sanity! it's as if she knows when I just need some time out. smile

Secondsop Tue 08-Jan-13 17:27:17

COD that sounds really painful. Hope it clears up soon.

All of those with relationship / general worries: my view on such things is that it would be a miracle if everything else continued to go well in one's life once a baby is thrown into the midst, so I think we're all doing incredibly well. I said this before but I think it bears repeating: precious generations didnt raise children like this because they either had nearby family and community to all pitch in, or if richer they outsourced the whole shebang to wet nurses and, later, governesses. It really is relatively modern for women to raise babies relatively alone, like we do.

And just because things like breastfeeding are natural doesnt mean they're easy. I can't think of any other physiological function where people say that all women should be able to do it. We managed to get breastfeeding going but the problem was that Z wasn't gaining weight which is why we've introduced quite a lot of formula, but I found it really hard to get breastfeeding going and it wasnt made any easier by the guilt of not exlusively breastfeeding, so i would never criticise any woman who didn't continue with breastfeeding. What's right for your baby isn't as simple as "breast" - there are a whole host of factors involving YOUR wellbeing as well, that all contribute.

MaMaPo Tue 08-Jan-13 17:30:29

Hear hear, seconds!

Well said seconds must remember to use it to stop beating myself up as well as reassuring others

pmgkt Tue 08-Jan-13 17:47:38

Emily get that checked out even if just nhs direct, I was told to watch out for any changes in my legs

seconds Well said! In the past 4 weeks I've often thought how things would be easier with a whole community around to help you...Past generations and other cultures seem to have got that right. It's such a lonely task being a mum these days, unless you're lucky enough to have an amazing support network around you. And even then you might struggle - I have a wonderful DP and in-laws and friends close by but I still feel like I should be able to do this alone! confused

I listened to the radio 4 programme this morning and it was so good to hear that I'm not the only mum struggling to come to terms with motherhood. Definitely worth a listen.

cod So jealous about your LO being settled in her basket! Since coming home a few hours ago DD has fed every 20mins or so, in between I've tried to settle her with the bouncy chair and sling (dancing around the house) but she's not happy for longer than 10mins max. I'm exhausted so wonderful DP has taken DD to another room so I can have a break. Why oh why does he have to go back to work tomorrow?? sad

Which reminds me, how was your day mama? Didn't your DH go back to work today?

DS is fast asleep but I have to finish the online food shop, fold the washing and fill in the tax credits form argh!

EggsMichelle Tue 08-Jan-13 20:09:58

Spotty I still need to fill out the child benefits form, he will be going to uni at this rate before I get round to it!

Prepping the first formula feed, already messed up by dropping the bottle on the floor and having to re sterilise it, why am I so anxious about this?

PurplePidjin Tue 08-Jan-13 20:12:47

Gripe water is genius!

CODwidow Tue 08-Jan-13 20:20:21

Ha ha spoke too soon!

Oh be quick eggs they only back date it six weeks!

WLmum Tue 08-Jan-13 20:24:59

Grrr my posts keep going astray.

Can't retype it all, main thing was straw poll - do your babes have any happy awake non-boob time? Tabitha seems to have 3 settings - asleep, boobing or crying. Boobs always solve the crying. Not sure if it's just because she's still little - 3 weeks today or if it's something I should get checked, dreaded reflux? She does puke alot.

Loving the fb work!

Someone asked me today if ds was sleeping through yet shockconfusedangry

Hi everyone well it was back to work for me today sad thankfully Ethan was very very good and fed and slept all day (worked 10-3) so it went quite well. His awake time is 4-bed. He's been under his gym for 10 minutes happily and now he's having some tummy time, he's not so happy with that!, he just started screaming! Lol

I've managed to completely forget most of what's been discussed today. Sorry ladies. Oh and I am sorry to hear people are having such a horrible time, for various reasons. I remember really struggling with dd and ds1 were little, somehow Ethan is a lot easier and Im not finding it as hard this time around. It does get easier, but you need to take one day at a time.

DH pissing me off royally insisting there's something wrong with Ethans hearing as he wasn't reacting to him clicking. He won't listen to me telling him to stop worrying and that Ethan is fine and he's now being a sarcastic cunt bastard and going 'oh thank you doctor glad you're here' angry fuck sake!!!

WL DD's rarely happy when she's awake and not on the boob (she's 4 weeks tomorrow). I try different things but she usually starts crying again after 10mins (sometimes 20 if I'm lucky) so I offer the boob again. It's a never ending cycle! I have been wondering if it's normal? And when do babies stop crying so much and start being happy even when awake?

Stacey did he have the newborn hearing screening?

Ds can be happily awake for a few hours, sometimes I have to bounce his bouncer to keep him happy though!

Dd's got nursery tomorrow so I'm going to sleeeeep!

MaMaPo Tue 08-Jan-13 21:16:41

Hmm, haven't clustered for a while but little C is wide awake and keeping on rooting, so am stuck to the couch.

Peony, not sure if it was you who asked - first day after paternity leave went well. Got up with my husband (a real change - we'd been staying in bed until 11-12) and for lots done round the house. My Mil came over in the afternoon and cuddled her while I lay down for an hour and went grocery shopping. She even slept again after Mil left. So the day has been pretty easy but this evening has been more tricky - in very tired and feel a bit tied to the baby now. I hope she settles soon so I can go to bed.

My baby does have some happy awake time, but still needs quite a lot of close supervision. She doesn't yet really tolerate being left on her own.

spotty yeah he passed the hearing screening in the hospital (12 hrs old). But DH decided I wasn't to be trusted when I said Ethan was fine so he googled and found lots of 'it's not accurate' stuff online. The thing is he is fine he reacts to the sound of his rainmaker when he's happy, and jumps when he makes a loud lip smacky noise when he's pissing about not latching properly. But apparantly I can't be trusted! Urgh.

WLmum Tue 08-Jan-13 21:28:51

Goodness Stacey back to work already?! I can't imagine!
Thanks peony, you and me together then!

PurplePidjin Tue 08-Jan-13 21:37:16

What's so interesting about dh clicking? confused he should try singing or blowing raspberries - something a baby might actually want to respond to!

About 5 weeks here for the happy/awake combo, and still only for 10-15 minutes at a time.

I'm back at work on Thursday but i only work one evening a week!

God knows pidj something about it being a loud noise and he should react to it confused whereas I think Ethan is so used to the kids rushing round screeching (both when I was of and now) that loud noises just don't bother him!

And yep, back to work. But I work from home so im still with ds, and have worked out how to position the v-pillow so I can feed him and carry on working.

MaMaPo Tue 08-Jan-13 22:03:18

For those of you who have frequent cluster feeding days- does it affect your mood? We have them rarely - maybe every 10 days or so - but when I do I am really tearful. Tonight I feel like I did with the baby blues! I just cried at my husband about how much I love him. Hmm, maybe being so tied to the baby emphasises the changed nature of our relationship - all I'd like to do tonight is lie in bed and cuddle him, but instead I have sent him onto the sofa bed to ensure he gets a decent night's sleep.

Motherhood is weird and odd and often doesn't leave me with much dignity. hmm

mama Glad to hear you had a good day! Hope you'll have plenty of those! smile I'm trying to be positive about tomorrow <I will cope without DP, I will>

stacey wow, feeding while working - I'm very impressed!!

Co-sleeping mums - if you wake up before your baby, do you leave them in your bed or put down in the moses basket/cot? We usually end up co-sleeping in the morning and I'm worried that if I move DD she'll wake up and I won't get a chance to have my shower/breakfast but not sure if it's safe to leave her in the big bed on her own either. So far DP's been there with her but I'll be on my own from tomorrow.

Secondsop Tue 08-Jan-13 22:17:47

blushingpeony I pop Z in the carrycot rather than leave him in the big bed by himself. I also often take the carrycot into the bathroom while I shower.

I can't remember who asked about happy/awake time. z is 5 weeks + 5 days and I would say it's the last 7-10 days that we've had any real periods of him not sleeping, feeding or crying - before then he'd look around for a few minutes at a time but that was about it. Now he'll do a lot more eye contact and will look round the room and at us loads more. And we can put him on his animal activity mat thing now and he seems entertained by looking at it.

WLmum Tue 08-Jan-13 22:24:27

Dd cluster feeds every evening at the moment. Mostly I'm ok with it, but some days, particularly after a bad night it leaves me feeling a bit smothered and sad that I don't have time for affection with anyone else. I just keep telling myself that it's only a short phase...! Great to hear you love DH so much though , he must feel pretty special. Oh and a glass of vino while I'm pinned down helps too!!

WLmum Tue 08-Jan-13 22:32:06

Thanks for answers about happy awake time, hoping it's just an age thing then, will give her another week or so to mature!

I do move T into her basket when I wake up - normally because I'm desperate to change position and defrost under the duvet but it almost always wakes her up.

Clarella Tue 08-Jan-13 22:44:29

seconds - you summed up quite a lot of what was said on that programme.

<yawn> I'll hav to catch up tomorrow been ordered to sleep while Dh and visiting pal do bottles. yes gripe water too smile - which one pidj there's a lot!

EggsMichelle Tue 08-Jan-13 22:45:36

A whole day of cluster feeding leaves me tired which leads to the tearful state. 4wks5days and the last couple of days we have had long period (Hours) of awake time that need constant entertaining and interaction else the screaming starts. We don't have a play mat yet, but if I play with him in his chair he screams!

First FF went well, although he polished off the full 7oz carton and demanded boob still!!! Asleep now, hope the gripe water will keep him comfy.

Checking in ridiculously late lack of sleep is frying me.. Not to mention the early starts with school run <yawn>
Off to attempt to catch up .. with baby B hanging off boob

MaMaPo Tue 08-Jan-13 23:30:30

I hate cluster feeds. I have no confidence that they'll ever end. sad

Did I read somewhere amongst my reading about a FB group??

Today I have bought a Ewan, I am very excited to see if it works! Also the comfort milk is making such a difference to the colic. smile

Yes cookie there's an fb group, we all pmed honey a link to our profiles and she kindly added us.

SeymoreInOz Wed 09-Jan-13 00:19:00

Well said seconds! DS is the first baby I've had on the other side of the world to immediate family and it has been tough. My mum is here at the mo for a 3 week holiday and it's lovely, DS will settle on her while I eat, and she takes the older DCs out during the day. I will really feel the strain when she goes home!

Yesterday was quite something, it was 43 degrees and poor DS just couldn't cope. He was awake from 7am until 10pm despite lots of cool baths and being parked under a fan. He couldn't get cool. Definitely my hardest day with him so far. DH really annoyed me when he got home from work (at 8 pm) and had to spend half an hour settling the older DCs to bed. He was really stropping about not being able to eat his dinner straight away, after I'd spent the whole day tied to inconsolable DS while he'd been sat in an air conditioned office or coffee shop! Then he took DS later and kept asking me to fetch things for him (like beer) because DS was sleeping! I'm always at someone's beck and call!!

DS has some "happy" awake time, it's definitely increasing as he gets older. He'll be 6 weeks on Monday.

Did the Facebook group happen? I'd like to join!

SeymoreInOz Wed 09-Jan-13 00:19:45

X post, will pm Honey

utopian99 Wed 09-Jan-13 01:00:06

mamapo i definitely get more emotional during clustering, and wlmum am the same about lack of affection getting to me when prevented by feeding etc.. O went to sleep for 30 minutes at 9.30pmish and although prevented from anything 'proper' by bleeding, just the chance to have a teenage fumble and snooze together has done wonders for my mood now I'm.awake again..

stacey what's the trick with your v pillow and working? Do you use a laptop? Am thinking about how to manage this once dh goes back to work..

peony probably not helpful but i have been known to make O a padded nest in the bidet for morning shower etc. He can't fall out and i don't want to leave him on the big bed..

O has occasional happy non-feeding awake time, generally not more than 15 mins a day though..

Sob Ewan's not working. J is more alert than he ever is. Currently swaddled, sucking my finger and working himself into a right tizzy sad

MaMaPo Wed 09-Jan-13 02:12:37

Still feeding WTAF. Now in brilliant stage where she wakes, cries, refuses to latch on, falls asleep. Lather, rinse, repeat with distressing regularity and frequency.

Seymore - same here. Would love love love it if my mum or sister were here.

SeymoreInOz Wed 09-Jan-13 02:41:15

willyou I hope J is sleeping now?

mamapo it's really hard. Have they got any plans to visit? At booking in the MW classed me as medium risk pregnancy just because I had no family nearby!

utopian with the v pillow I have it round my waist up at my desk, with the corner perched up on the desk so Ethan doesn't roll underneath. Not sure how you'd work it without a desk tbh.

Well we're feeding after last feed at 10.45. But he would not settle after that one, and ended up sleeping on my chest. I couldn't work out if he was in pain or just being a pain, but the amount of shouting it took just to get him quiet I wasn't even bothering to attempt the moses basket. And he at least slept for 3 1/2 hrs so there's definately a plus side!

Every two hours here....

Clarella Wed 09-Jan-13 04:56:07

shock just gone 4 hours between feeds - took a while to settle him so only really 2 and half hours sleep but still, feels like right direction...

utopian99 Wed 09-Jan-13 05:03:52

Had an early evening kip from 10-12ish, (in his hammock rather than our bed, no less,) then major feed until sleep 1.44am-3am, shortish snack and sleep 3.45am till now at 5. Doesn't look great written down but more than I've had in ages and feel like new woman! High hopes of another hour's sleep in there somewhere betweenn now and 9am too. Whoop! <easily pleased>

Also thanks for the pillow tactic stacey,.will try it for research purposes tomorrow!

MaMaPo Wed 09-Jan-13 05:08:32

I think I'd be lucky to have had 20mins sleep in a row. Maybe an hour cumulatively? Horrendous.

Utopian and Clarella, they sound like pretty good timings! Glad you're feeling better with the extra sleep.

Well fabcy seeing you all here. We were up til 3am, he slept until 4:30 now back up shouting with wind. I neeed sleeeep!

emilyeggs Wed 09-Jan-13 06:12:37

Morning all, my boobs have gone huge today (I guess my milk has come in) and now Henry can't get a latch a well as before sad. Any tips ladies ?

halesball Wed 09-Jan-13 06:21:04

Hi, i'm new to Mumsnet so i don't know any of the abbreviations (sorry). I had a little girl (Heidi) on the 7th of december, shes my 1st child. I've been reading this thread and i want to say thank you to you all, at least i know Heidi's sleeping isn't as bad as i thought as she seems to be like alot of your children. I just doubt myself when people keep saying to me she should be sleeping longer your obviously not giving her enough breastmilk. Just a quick question has anyone got any good tips to help deal with Colic? I already use Colief and it seems to help a little and i've also tried cool boiled water, but i hate seeing her pull her legs up to her stomach and the crying.
Also has anyone else had Mastitis and carried on breastfeeding if so when does the pain stop? I feel like my breast is a flame thrower when shes feeding haha

halesball Wed 09-Jan-13 06:29:26

Emilyeggs, could you try hand expressing abit off 1st and seeing if this helps reduce the size abit then try latching on?

emilyeggs Wed 09-Jan-13 06:36:13

Thanks hale I will try that now. Ps welcome and congrats on Heidi thanks

Welcome hales smile no advice but I'm sure some others will have

Emily I agree hand express a little bit, nor too much though. Your boobs will settle down in a couple of days and you can take paracetamol if you need to

emily I third the hand expressing tip. Ethan had major problems latching when my milk came in and we had an awful night. When I hand expressed so they were a bit softer he latched straight away again.

hales welcome my main tip for colic is keep baby upright as much as possible, slings work well for this. That used to calm ds1 although he was a nightmare and I had to be walking outside for him to stop shouting hmm

Well last night wasn't the best Ethan is obviously not comfy with wind and only spent 1 1/2 hrs in his Moses basket. But oh well, I got sleep just with a baby attached! Lol

Today's plan is work and then I shall have to brave the food shop, think it'll have to be after the dcs finish school though as that'll be easier than trying to work with them home.

Stacey you need to do it online! Mine is being delivered this afternoon.

halesball Wed 09-Jan-13 07:25:49

Thank you Emily and Spotty and Stacey i'll try that today thank you

Clarella Wed 09-Jan-13 07:30:43

..... hmm good timings but George was WIDE awake from then on - he couldn't decide if he wanted milk or not, then fussed and strained, then wanted it but then did book shouting then we 'read' books, stared at lights, had two changes before finally having an hour long feed at 6, a doze another feed and NOW dropping off.... but I've got to get up. there was no crying at any point but threats if I put hi down ....

welcome hales!

Secondsop Wed 09-Jan-13 07:47:35

Morning all. Not a bad night here as Z is sleeping pretty well now that I let him sleep next to me. However the night is obv still interrupted by feeding - not as much as when I was breastfeeding more, but because I'm trying to get my supply up I am doing bottles AND giving him the boob AND expressing whenever I do a bottle. So it's kind of the worst of all worlds for me as I'm not getting the night-time advantages of the bottle but it's all in a good cause as I am sure he is getting more solid.

Welcome hales . For colic, to add to what the others said: I've not tried colief but I use infacol and that seems to help. I second the advice on keeping the baby upright during the feed and also for a good 20 minutes afterwards. Also, youre probably doing this already but if not, wind a couple of times during the feed, not just at the end. If you are using bottles for any of your feeds, i have just switched to Dr Browns and there is a marked difference. For bottles it also helps to stop while there's a tiny bit of milk left in the teat so that the baby isn't sucking on just air.

Clarella - staring at lights is a popular activity here as well smile

spotty see I'm always disappointed when I shop online. I get wrong things, I order wrong sizes or they substitute stuff. I find it much more fulfilling going to the shop hmm thankfully dd and ds1 are really well behaved and some days I don't even have to bribe them with chocolate in the supermarket so it's not a problem. Just me being lazy. There's only so many times I can rustle up dinner from tins and the freezer though!

Secondsop Wed 09-Jan-13 07:56:04

Oh a cool thing happened today - I was changing Z's nappy in the cot (currently used as nappy station and baby wherewithal repository only) and he's got a toy in there that lights up and plays music that I sometimes put on while changing him to calm him down, and i hadn't turned it on today as he was calm but then I noticed he was reaching out and touching it! I think that's probably the first time he's tried to touch an object (excluding the hair-pulling).

Eek, this is just the kind of thing I would have been all "so your baby touched something? Big whoop" about before giving birth blush

Secondsop Wed 09-Jan-13 07:59:33

Stacey and spotty I probably physically went to the supermarket about once a month before birth, but I've found myself going more now as I am finding it a useful Thing To Get Us Out Of The House. A friend told me the supermarket was good for stimulation for babies because of all the lights and bright colours, although it does tend to have the opposite effect for us of sending Z to sleep.

Afrodizzywonders Wed 09-Jan-13 08:38:47

MaMaPo - K was fussing yesterday evening, pulling away, crying, wanting to latch, not wanting to latch....I think she was tired as whenever I jiggled her she went off to sleep but not for long. At 10pm I put on my white noise app on my iPad, I put the heartbeat sound on, her body relaxed in my arms immediately ad she fell straight off into a deep sleep (she clasped her hands together and minutes later they were in the air above her head).

I kept the heartbeat noise going all night, she woke at 2am briefly and 5.30am. Feeding wasn't as easy as she kept falling asleep on me.

It could be a coincidence of course but I'm going with this womb noise placater! This ne'er worked for DS, oly the Hoover would.

Afrodizzywonders Wed 09-Jan-13 08:40:22

Point being mamapo, maybe try some noise like that for baby in the evening, K was giving me some hellish nights and not wanting to settle, worth a try?

SeymoreInOz Wed 09-Jan-13 08:44:09

Welcome hales! Just to add to the other advice, this article has some good tips:


utopian99 Wed 09-Jan-13 08:47:51

afro which app do you have with the heartbeat noise on it? I have a white noise app but it doesn't have a heartbeat and I really want to get one to try on O..

Bellaboo123 Wed 09-Jan-13 09:02:27

Welcome hales - I had mastitis, have you got anti-biotics? It took 2 doses to get rid of mine. It does ease after a few days just keep feeding (and gritting your teeth) through the pain. Also hot compress as you're feeding makes it easier. Also massage your boobs when you're in the shower - wish you better!

seymore great link, a couple of friends have been to the oxford clinic and speak very highly of it. there's some interesting stuff in the article though without having to go to oxford.

peony i co-sleep (reluctantly -started when C was ill and couldn't breathe lying down - now he won't sleep anywhere but with me) and take DS with me to the bathroom in the morning - pop him in his rocker and the noise of the shower lulls him back to quiet if not sleep.

must get DS to sleep somewhere else soon, DH has sadly said he misses me sad even though he's next to me all night.

would love to fb too, will try to pm

hope today's a good day all around smile

MaMaPo Wed 09-Jan-13 09:31:28

Thanks Afro - I do have an app but she's not been interested in it before. She's normally quite easy to feed and settle - I suspect this is a growth spurt and hope it doesn't last too long. There's a limit to what I can cope with.

Welcome hales

DD's at nursery and I should probably sleep but all I want to do is clean the kitchen!

I could start an AIBU today and probably get flamed and hundreds of posts... I just pulled up opposite my house and there was an elderly (not frail) lady walking past. I got out of the car, got the changing bag out of the back and went to get DS out of the car and she asked me for a lift to the shop (not far, just round the corner). I said no, because ds needed feeding and I wanted to get him in. I was a bit UR wasn't I?

My reasoning is that she could walk better than me. I had just got in, if I had been going out it might have been a bit different. I only have one spare seat in the car and that's in the back and covered in everything I own important stuff. By the time I had walked to my front door she was already at the end of the road (halfway to the shop). Are the whole village going to hate me now?! I have never seen this lady before....

FriendofDorothy Wed 09-Jan-13 09:49:05

I am tired today!

Edward was hard to settle and was on a feeding mission! I feel knackered and like I am on a go slow now!

halesball Wed 09-Jan-13 09:56:20

Thank you Secondsop i'll be trying that today, fingers crossed it works. Seymour that article is interesting i have rang the breast feeding support lady and she is coming out to check that Heidi is latched on properly.

Bella, i'm on the 1st set on antibiotics now, they've helped with the redness and sorted my temperature out just waiting for the breast to return to normal and the pain to stop.

This thread is really interesting because my family all seem to blame me breast feeding for Heidi's poor sleeping and the amount shes up to feed. Constantly quoting if shes not getting enough shes going to try and feed from you. This is despite her gaining weight and having ALOT of dirty nappies. So its really reassuring to see that other mothers are up just as much as we are. Although at the time i feel like we're the only people up haha

Secondsop Wed 09-Jan-13 10:00:26

spotty a complete stranger randomly asked you for a lift when you had just got home with a baby in tow and were in the process of getting him inside? You were not unreasonable AT ALL to say no. Did she say why she was asking, eg was she struggling to walk in some way and was in desperate straits? If so, then not entirely unreasonable of her to ask for help, but neither was it unreasonable for you to say no.

No, she just kept asking me! She was completely able bodied, didn't have any walking aids and it's not raining grin

halesball Wed 09-Jan-13 10:05:22

Spotty don't feel bad for saying no, its weird that a stranger would ask for a lift anyway. Plus in this day and age you can't trust strangers. They managed to get from their home to near the shop so they were obviously mobile enough. Plus everyone knows a hungry baby takes priority

Secondsop Wed 09-Jan-13 10:13:23

It IS weird for a stranger to ask for a lift, yes. I think this is the thing I struggle with about it - it wasn't a normal "putting somebody out but hoping they'll help anyway" request. It was a weird request!

spotty I actually laughed that she expected you to! I could understand if she was in a LOT of pain having a heart attack
Right will attempt honey I'm crap at linking and stuff like that.
4 weeks old today eeek.
Welcome (on phone, forgotten name, so sorryblush )

EggsMichelle Wed 09-Jan-13 11:26:44

Thanks for the article. I had got a bit lazy with his latch, as he appeared to have it spot on, I will be doing the nipple to nose again and see if that helps.

And yes it is weird for a stranger to do that!

itsMYNutella Wed 09-Jan-13 12:07:20

Seymore thanks for the article! It looks really interesting, I will definitely be giving the advice about letting baby terminate the feed a go!

itsMYNutella Wed 09-Jan-13 12:10:56

Eggs I've been shown to sort of squeeze my nipple and then tickle him with it, shoving it in at the right moment (when his mouth is big and wide) and supporting (almost pushing on) his head at the same time. Latch seems fine here but I'm going to experiment with letting him terminate the feed.

Thanks everyone I don't feel bad anymore! Just eating some mini eggs. Ds has been awake all morning so no nap for me!

EggsMichelle Wed 09-Jan-13 12:51:43

Nutella that's the way I've been taugh too, but to tickle just under the nose so he can smell the milk. I've had a practice, and I'm sure his latch is spot on but I will continue and see if it makes a difference tonight.

ISpyPlumPie Wed 09-Jan-13 13:24:01

Baby weigh-in this morning - N is now 12lb 7oz (up from 7lb 10 oz at birth). Very proud, but also a bit shock - obviously knew he was getting bigger, but not that he'd had such a spurt. Makes the weekend's feedathon seem worth it though.

ellliebelle Wed 09-Jan-13 13:30:21

Well today i have reached for the dummy......im not against the uae of them but am worried it may disrupt feeding. If ds genuinly wanted boob cause he is hungry would he happily take the dummy or would he keep crying for milk? At the minute he is happy with dummy but i cant help but worry

ISpy shock what an amazing weight gain! How old is he now?

Ellie ds will not take his dummy at all if he is hungry. They definitely know the difference.

WLmum Wed 09-Jan-13 14:14:52

I would not give weird random stranger lady a lift, certainly not with db on tow.

A dummy might delay baby requesting a feed but only for a short time, after that I imagine you would get some cross spitting out!

We had a mixed night, T went in her basket for a couple of decent stretches - 2 hours ish, unfortunately I was up from 1.30 til 4 feeding and trying to settle her again. Pretty sure she's got the dreaded reflux so have got dr apt for her tom.

New moby wrap has arrived, am v excited to try it out - have tried with dds dolly and all seems good, just need Tabs to wake up from her nap and play with me!

Clarella Wed 09-Jan-13 14:51:47

sling meet success! hired a ring sling smile smile smile

ISpyPlumPie Wed 09-Jan-13 15:03:28

Spotty - he's 5+4, can't believe how quickly time"s going. Also agree with everyone else that I would NOT be giving a lift to a random, esp when there was obviously no need!

Ellie - we've just introduced adummy as N seemed to be trying to comfort-suck when he was really tired, and getting angry with the boob for producing milk!It seemed to help him settle for a bit, but he spat it out quickly enough when he was hungry. The only reason we hadn"t tried it sooner really was because his big bro was an absolute dummy refusnik so it wasn't something we ended up doing last time. Yet another way in which they are all different I suppose.

PurplePidjin Wed 09-Jan-13 15:04:27

Yay for slings! R napped for 2 hours in his at knitting group today while i made him an Easter Bunny hat to wear in it - ears and tail rather than face as it's only visible from the back grin going to try and sell some, how much would people pay for something like that? £15? More? Less?

I wouldn't let a random stranger get in my car, baby or no baby, unless they were incapacitated through illness and there was no ambulance available. What an odd woman confused happy to brave AIBU on your behalf if you like?

PurplePidjin Wed 09-Jan-13 15:13:52

Dp has decided that he and R should take their afternoon naps together.

I can hear screaming

I have decided it's not my problem

I have a blanket square to finish and a bunny hat to tweak and a nappy wash to hang up

<naughty Mummy Pidj>

Only if u can tell you YABVVVVVVU wink she did look really quite elderly that's the only reason I felt bad grin but like I said she was very mobile!

PurplePidjin Wed 09-Jan-13 15:46:27

shock I'm scared now pidj!

It's going well so far wink

WLmum Wed 09-Jan-13 16:38:57

Hehe, will check it out.

Currently got Tabs in the moby - don't think I've perfected it quite yet but she's fast asleep having comfort nibbled the boob. Def feel happier letting go than I did with ring sling. Wish we had a local meet/support group around here.

grin Spotty & Pidj

Well Jamie hasn't slept all night or all night.. Currently losing my mind! Managed 1h 20m at 3am but nothing since.

Would I have been unreasonable to have told this woman to fuck off? (I did not) I was in boots buying gripe water and canestan when she looked in my basket and said:
Her: you can't give them that til 3 months.
Me: Nope its 1 month.
Her: I don't like that stuff then don't fucking buy it they do something called infacol buy that instead.
Me: I've tried it I said it doesn't work for him.
Her: he's a boy maybe he's just windy.
Me (internally): that's really fucking helpful, I'll remember that at 2am when he's screaming in pain.

Why can't people mind their own business? <cranky tired mummy emoticon>

MaMaPo Wed 09-Jan-13 17:31:16

I'm with you Willyou! I'm also sleep deprived and I would have been even more scathing to someone like that sticking their nose into my shopping basket.

Gah - I hoped today would be easier, but she's crying so much! She isn't usually a very cry-ey baby so I am perplexed! I just keep offering the boob, and she keeps taking it and that seems to work most o the time, so I guess... Just continue on?

Thanks Mama, Jamie is not a cryer but has spent the entire day wailing sad. He seems to want to suck for comfort (but doesn't want a dummy) I have been giving my finger. Could you try a dummy? I just want some sleep <wail>

Growth spurt MaMaPo?

WillYou how rude of her! Because obviously all babies are the same hmm

I wouldn't mind but her little darling was killing the shit out of a display of Benylin


We did our first big full day out today. Left at 9.15 and just got home. Tired. Was waiting for DH at one point when a woman came over, looked in the pram and said 'how old?'
Me: nearly 11 weeks
Her: does he sleep at night?
Me: not really
Her (with a smug look): my daughters LO is 8 months and has never slept longer than 2 hours

Me (to dh): well that's really fecking helpful to know isn't it?

It's like horrific birth stories- people -especially older past having babies ones-- go out of their way to tell you the rubbish stuff to try a get a rise out of you.

Grrr. Sounds like lots of us have had interesting experiences with strangers today...

Honey you must be exhausted! I'm tired just thinking about it!

MaMaPo Wed 09-Jan-13 18:22:27

Spotty - I am telling myself it's a growth spurt, as that way it will end sometime! i think there's a 4-6 week or 6 week growth spurt, and she's 5 weeks today so perhaps that's it. She had a less intense version of this at the 3 week growth spurt.

A shame - MIL was supposed to look after her this evening while my husband and i went out for a nice dinner together, but I am so shattered and she's so fractious that we have opted out. I think my husband is particularly disappointed but then again he's not the one who was up all night.

She is lying in her crib grizzling at the moment but I can feel that it will erupt into full blown wails any second now...

mama that's what I normally do! Today DD finally took a dummy for the first time (she's always just spat it out before) and happily sucked it for at least an hour whilst in the carrier so I'm def gonna try that again.

ispy amazing weight gain, well done!!

willyule sounds like a tough night/day, definitely don't need other people giving you useless "advice" when you're sleep-deprived! big hugs

Got some infant gaviscon from the GP today but I'm not convinced that DD has reflux. How do you know? Does gaviscon really help? Can you give both infacol and gaviscon?? confused

peony we had infant gaviscon at the weekend and it was awful. Helped with the sickness but D didn't poo from Saturday till 11.30pm Monday (he normally has about 6-8 small ones a day) and was in so much pain it wasn't worth it. He was miserable until total poomageddan on Monday night resulting in all clothes going in wash, D going I'm midnight bath and DH going for a shower I've been recommended by lots of people to ask for ranitidine as doesn't cause this and is much better if bf. can't remember if you're bf or ff, sorry.

Ds practically hums the whole time when feeding he's so noisy confused

Afrodizzywonders Wed 09-Jan-13 18:47:05

Utopia - this is the app I'm using www.tmsoft.com/iphone-whitenoisebaby.html but I just know it could all change any day, these babies like to keep us on our toes!

Secondsop Wed 09-Jan-13 18:47:06

ispy that weight gain is amazing! I really hope Z follows your example tomorrow at weigh in. He is definitely longer as we've moved up a size in some clothes but he's still in "up to 1 month" clothes at almost 6 weeks.

thanks honey I breastfeed so that sounds horrendous. DD doesn't really vomit much, I just mentioned to the GP that she did it one night and sometimes seems to fight the breast and she immediately prescribed gaviscon. DD is usually very fractious during the day but ok during the night so I don't really understand what's wrong? Maybe she's just a cry-ey baby? confused

Some babies get really bored. Ds can be moaning in his bouncer but if I move it to the other side of the room he stops. I really want a swing for him but they're quite pricey

utopian99 Wed 09-Jan-13 19:00:45

Well today I have been mostly feeding in public!! Have gone from never outside of our house/no audience but dh, to baby change at house of Fraser, then cafe at HoF, then doctor's waiting room!

Went into city centre at lunchtime to look for new jumpers for dh before doctors appointment for me, walked all over and only just got home. Have some snazzy babygros for O too (was feeling like a bad mummy for only having totally plain white ones..) He was pretty good on the whole but when a newborn wants food you don't refuse! No one told me off or gave me funny looks so feeling braver now.

Worried about if/when reflux or colic kick in for O; it seems unavoidable at some point for most babies but hasn't hit us yet.

pidj will you be posting a picture of your bunny hat? It sounds cute- i would have thought people would pay £15?

peony f you do try it I got told to make the paste with 5ml of water then add 5ml of breast milk and use syringe to get it in but unless things are really bad I personally would never touch the stuff again for him.

Bellaboo123 Wed 09-Jan-13 19:43:23

Help please - anyone else any experience of tongue tie procedure?

Aurelia had it today and came home ok at lunchtime but since 4 has been screaming and inconsolable - she only usually grizzles and rarely do we have full blown crying - help really worried what to do!!!

Bella post in chat you will get loads of answers and help. I have no idea I'm afraid sad hope you're both ok

pmgkt Wed 09-Jan-13 20:03:46

Hv been today. Edward is half an ounce off his birth weight so nearly there.

Another day of work done. Yippee. Lol and we all survived asda, just. Ethan is very put out as he had to wait a whole 2.5 hrs from one feed to the next when we were out. Which is unheard of during the day. Now he can't work out if he wants to be awake and feeding or asleep. confused

PurplePidjin Wed 09-Jan-13 20:24:46

Oh bella I hope she's ok sad

MaMaPo Wed 09-Jan-13 20:36:46

Bella, maybe she's just a bit shocked and stressed. Mustn't be much fun for you though. (Don't think I've mentioned how muh I love her name!)

In laws are here, baby has been asleep for 2 hours (!), bottle of expressed milk I ready, and I'm in the bath. Brilliant. Now we just need little miss to sleep and feed normally tonight and all will be great.

Utopian, how did you feel feeding in public? I've done it so often in the first 5 weeks that I think I've totally gotten over any squirm or embarrassment. I don't have very large breasts though, which may make it easier.

WLmum Wed 09-Jan-13 20:52:56

bella, my Tabitha had her tt sniped last week and I think she was a bit more unsettled that evening but certainly not really distressed. Sorry to hear your lo is having a hard time. Hope she settles down soon.

Aw Bella poor little thing. Lots of cuddles in order I think. J's going for his fine tomorrow of they're willing to do it now I've given up on breast feeding, Im scared now sad

CODwidow Wed 09-Jan-13 21:27:58

Not sure I can handle the pain in my left breast now, I know the antibiotics will kick in soon but really strugglingsad

Oh COD I can't imagine how hard it's been. Could you just feed dd from the right and express from the left until the antibiotics kick in? Give your nipple a break at least?

Ethan is currently sleeping on his front on my bed. Every time I've put him on his back he's screamed, not sure what's going on. Poor thing.

Bellaboo123 Wed 09-Jan-13 21:51:34

Willyou didn't mean to scare you - procedure itself was over in literally seconds! They gave a talk explaining procedure etc before hand and made me feel so much better hearing all the things caused by tongue tie eg extra wind, extra feeding due to bad latch (didn't realise) clicking noises, fussing when latching.
She's starting to settle down a bit now - just so scary when they are so little and helpless hmm

Bellaboo123 Wed 09-Jan-13 21:53:01

Cod try a hot water bottle as you feed helps with the let down. Also take 2 nurophen

CODwidow Wed 09-Jan-13 22:03:20

stacey I may have to do that as I think the thrush has changed the taste of my milk as dd will feed happily on the right but is on/off the left.

We got told that if infection seems to alter the taste of the milk eat garlic or take garlic tablets as it balances out whatever chemicals are altering it. Don't know of that's of any help but thought id mention it.

Thanks Bella hope Aurelia's back to her usual self soon. We have all those symptoms even though we're bottle feeding. He couldn't latch on the breast for more than 3 sucks before falling off and crying. It was awful.

Off to bed to make up for last night, night all

halesball Wed 09-Jan-13 22:38:29

COD the breastfeeding advisor who came to see me today told me that in Holland and Barretts the do a tablet which is good for thrush. She couldn't remember the name but said if i went in told them i was breastfeeding and on antibiotics and was looking for the tablet with good bacteria which prevented thrush, they would know what i meant. She said some of her previous mothers swore by it.

Secondsop Wed 09-Jan-13 22:48:55

bella hope Aurelia feels better soon - poor little thing. Did they give you any information about aftercare / recovery that might explain why she's still upset?

Bella and those others whose babies have tongue ties - who diagnosed it? Was it a routine check or something you asked for? Someone suggested on the breast / bottle feeding section that I should make sure Z is checked for it as he does seem to have symptoms eg not always a good latch, fusses like a baby bird at the breast, hours and hours of feeding with no weight gain.

Midwife/infant feeding team on the ward spotted it when he couldn't latch Seconds. Are you still under your midwife? If not I'm sure your health visitor would be able to take a look.

elpth Wed 09-Jan-13 23:24:15

Hello everyone, can't even vaguely keep up with you all but will lurk and try! Baby Ianthe is doing very well so far but keeping us busy as are all the visitors. Have been out for short walks but hoping to venture further tomorrow. She's only 5 days today so it's a steep learning curve!

Secondsop Thu 10-Jan-13 00:18:12

willyou - thanks, have been discharged from midwives but will ask the health visitor tomorrow when we go for weigh in. Z had trouble latching in the hospital but I don't recall anyone checking for tongue tie either then or since. Am also going to see an NCT lactation consultant tomorrow to check his latch.

elpth I'm really impressed that you've been out for short walks already. By day 5 I was still a weepy mess barely capable of anything apart from curling into a ball.

elpth Thu 10-Jan-13 02:33:42

Actually the midwife was surprised too! We'd been told she would visit during the day but not when so I assumed she would phone first. We were out when she turned up. When she came back later she said that noone was ever out on their first day home, hence they don't set a time. Luckily she was impressed not annoyed blush
My usual midwife was on holiday or she'd not have been surprised seeing as I cycled to my 41 week appointment!
Middle of the night internetting seems to be the way forward but Ianthe's finished feeding now so back to bed I think grin

Every two hours again....

Ds won't settle I'm so fed up I just want to sleep!

MaMaPo Thu 10-Jan-13 04:12:25

Same here, Spotty, but after the constant feeding of the previous night this is definitely an improvement. I mean, I've slept!

utopian99 Thu 10-Jan-13 04:16:32

pidj those hats look cute! Have a friend due at the end of March so v tempted to ask you for one in newborn size just in case she doesn't go quite as overdue as i did!

mamapo felt okay actually. Just remembered a first feeding location yesterday at the sure start clinic, but of all the places to feel safe i think that's the best to start off.. In the cafe we were sitting so that i had my back to the general cafe with dh facing outwards so felt relatively unobtrusive, plus had worn a big slouchy wrap cardi which i could use to cover his head/worst of my boob..

bella and others with tt or having op, good luck and speedy recovery to your little ones! cod hope the thrush buggers right off clears up asap.

afro thanks for the app - it's the full version of the one i had previously for free so have stumped up cash and sounds are a lot better!

Am shocked at having fed O at midnight and only just woken up! This never happens..

I really struggle to keep my eyes open! Luckily dd is with mil today so I'm spending all day in bed! Bet ds won't sleep.... He's being really fussy right now and keeps pulling off my boob I hate that!

elpth Ethan was born sat night, we were home Sunday evening and I took the big dcs to school with him in the sling on Monday morning. People were shock but I felt fine. I'm much more active with a newborn than pregnant though. No way I could have cycled anywhere! Lol well done you!

PurplePidjin Thu 10-Jan-13 04:48:03

Congratulations, Elpth, I'm another one who missed the first visit - we'd gone out for coffee. I was climbing the walls after 2 days of labour and two days postnatal care!

Utopian, it doesn't have to be a bunny - I've had requests for a giraffe and a strawberry! - just pm me. I'm going to aim for one a week and be organised by writing people in a diary <efficient>

SeymoreInOz Thu 10-Jan-13 05:12:35

nutella how did you get on? I've been trying it and DS has been terminating the feed himself. I just assumed he would stay latched forever if I didn't pull him off myself!

He was really unsettled last night, not crying but grunting and straining and filling nappy after nappy. It went on until 4am.

PurplePidjin Thu 10-Jan-13 05:23:41

Are we supposed to take them off after a certain amount of time? Oops blush i just let R go until he either falls asleep, lets the nipple fall out because he's dozy (like just now, he's falling asleep on my chest) or, more recently, he wants to go play!

elpth Thu 10-Jan-13 05:40:47

pidj and stacey glad I'm not the only one!

utopian99 Thu 10-Jan-13 06:04:55

I just let him go till he falls asleep/loses interest too. Haven't timed feeds yet either, if he's asleep i leave him, and he normally wakes up wanting boob...

ISpyPlumPie Thu 10-Jan-13 07:08:49

Morning everyone.

Bella - how is A this morning? Hope she's feeling better and you managed to get some sleep.

Willyou - good luck for today. Hope everything goes well for J.

Secondsop - good luck for baby clinic. Certainly sounds like Z has grown.

COD - sounds really tough. Will keep fx that you manage to get it sorted soon.

halesball Thu 10-Jan-13 07:14:46

Pidj, i let Heidi stop the feed herself but always place my nipple back by her nose to make sure shes full. If she is full she won't open her mouth. Someone told me she'll go longer between feeds if she chooses when she stops. Not sure i believe that!

We're going on our 1st play date today to a sensory room and i'm nervous that she'll get hungry while i'm out really don't have the confidence to bf in public! I am hoping she enjoys it though. Also got the health visitor coming which i'm worried about she told us off last time the house was too warm but i was freezing. Had the heating on as little as possible to avoid the lecture this time.

shock Dp has taken dd to mil today. I've just woken up and they've gone without saying goodbye! I know he was just trying to let me sleep but still sad

Oh spotty I can see why you're sad but I'm sure dp was doing his best for you.

I'm doubting this bfing stuff confused maybe it's because we're not having a growth spurt, but he seems to be going longer between feeds and not feeding for as long. If he wasn't getting enough he wouldn't be happily sleeping/playing etc would he?! <neurotic first time bfer alert>

PurplePidjin Thu 10-Jan-13 07:59:34

Hales, that sounds like a nod and smile and think fuck off you nosy bitch moment! Too warm is hardly a SS matter!

Spotty, I'd be fuming at the lack of consultation angry

Stacey I think that's what they're meant to do confused take note ds hmm

PurplePidjin Thu 10-Jan-13 08:17:37

Agree with Spotty - his stomach is getting bigger and his jaw/sucking reflex is getting stronger smile

SeymoreInOz Thu 10-Jan-13 08:39:55

I don't time feeds, just tend to take him off if it's been more than half an hour or he's sleepy, but that's not the right thing to do. Sorry for the confusion.

We've had a really unsettled day. He's had red raw nappy rash for 3 weeks. The antibiotics didn't work, the anti fungal cream and oral drops didn't work. I've tried every barrier cream I can think of. I'm still getting through 50 nappies every other day because of the constant diarrhoea. I've been to the GP 3 times and the hospital once. I'm tired of wiping blood every time I change his nappy. Sorry to moan but I'm feeling a bit like there's nothing left to try!

Clarella Thu 10-Jan-13 08:49:52

quick post - c section peeps - have a friend staying who's a nurse doing an ma (msc??) in pediatric nursing and said they're now using bio oil on children with burns, the new big thing apparently. she recommended massaging section scar (I'm nearly 5 wks prob wouldn't do before 4) with it too to increase blood flow and help move fluid as long as doesn't hurt. doesn't have to be bio oil but she just mentioned that's what they're now using on the children's wards so can't hurt. her whole family are gps so she's pretty knowledgeable (and always sceptical) about stuff. (she didn't actually know pregg women all over world are slapping it on theirbbellies and shes pregnant herself!) I never used it but was given it so going to try - it'd feeling like it needs a bit of easing up at mo.

Clarella Thu 10-Jan-13 08:51:08

quick post - c section peeps - have a friend staying who's a nurse doing an ma (msc??) in pediatric nursing and said they're now using bio oil on children with burns, the new big thing apparently. she recommended massaging section scar (I'm nearly 5 wks prob wouldn't do before 4) with it too to increase blood flow and help move fluid as long as doesn't hurt. doesn't have to be bio oil but she just mentioned that's what they're now using on the children's wards so can't hurt. her whole family are gps so she's pretty knowledgeable (and always sceptical) about stuff. (she didn't actually know pregg women all over world are slapping it on theirbbellies and shes pregnant herself!) I never used it but was given it so going to try - it'd feeling like it needs a bit of easing up at mo.

Clarella Thu 10-Jan-13 08:51:24

oops sorry double post

pmgkt Thu 10-Jan-13 09:09:10

The general principle of massaging the scar to increase blood flow and healing is fine, I was advised this on a non section scar years ago. I was going to use up my bio oil on my scar don't see why this is any different. Don't be too hard though, I was told circular motion was best.

PurplePidjin Thu 10-Jan-13 09:13:32

Seymore, have you tried cloth nappies? I don't want to proselytise but they're far less likely to give a rash because there are fewer chemicals. Australia has some fab ones, i can invite you to some (fairly international) groups on fb if you like?

utopian99 Thu 10-Jan-13 09:25:34

I used bio oil for a bit but also silicon gel sheets for two months on operation scars which i imagine would behave the same way to a section some years ago which made a huge difference to the softness and colour, although I wouldn't pretend you can't see the scar anymore..

The sheets are made by elastoplast (cheaper ones), or cica-care (more expensive), and I cut them up to fit just along the scars which made the sheets go further/more cost effective.. You can buy them from big boots stores, or cheaper off ebay if you search.


WLmum Thu 10-Jan-13 09:29:26

seymore that sounds awful, poor little mite. I'm sure you have tried but I've always found metanium cream to work wonders. Also have tried leaving hisnappy off for as long as possible, for example if he's under his baby gym - use a disposable bed mat to catch expulsions!

seconds tt was picked up by hospital feeding advisor clinic thing. T's was posterior which they said often gets missed so I think we were lucky. Z sounds like dd1 - I never did get to the bottom of it but in hindsight think it's likely she had tt too.

Clarella Thu 10-Jan-13 09:43:36

thanks utopian and pmkt. was never too sure of bio oil but now have a use for the 3 bottles I was given!! (I'm giving 2 to other pregnant women!)

Clarella Thu 10-Jan-13 09:52:11

oh seymore - that's really tough. G has had an odd little raw bit round his bottom since week one - I feel awful about it but yours sounds much worse how awful sad it got better when we started using metanium then the doc prescribed canesten hc for the hc but we honestly think it got worse so stopped 2 days ago as the skin is bordering broken - only a couple of specs of blood tho - and I think trying to get it dry and thin layerof titanium helping slowly. Dh puts it on thickly though - I'm wondering if thin helps it dry out more. the constant pooing is hard though - every time we try to give nappy off time we're constantly wiping dribbles of poo. hope it gets better soon for you, the heat can't be helping <hugs>

Seymore that sounds horrible sad hope you can get it sorted soon

Seconds how did you get a lll councillor to come out to you?

SeymoreInOz Thu 10-Jan-13 10:28:18

Thanks everyone, sorry for the outburst. It looks like it's getting slightly worse even though we've been trying everything so I had a little meltdown. I'm also a bit worried about the amount of chemicals going on his butt - hydrocortisone, fucidin, daktarin, zinc etc!

clarella we have been putting the cream on very thick, a thinner application might be worth a try.

WLMum Actually I forgot the GP gave me some disposable mats, thanks! Saves endless towels going in the wash.

pidj I was actually starting to think it could be the nappies and maybe cloth nappies would be better. FB groups would be really helpful, thanks!

Stacks Thu 10-Jan-13 10:55:16

Little T had some slight nappy rash. A very thin layer of benpanthen (or something like that) has cleared it up in a few days. MW told me a thick layer of cream gets onto the nappy and stops it from absorbing the poo/wee. The rash is caused by ammonia from the poo and wee mixing - so the lack of absorption could be making it worse. Also second advice for time with nappy off.
Are you using wipes or water for cleaning bums? We're still on water, but I just bought reusable wipes (brand I got was Cheeky Wipes) they come with a natural essential oil to use, then you just add water. Easier than cotton wool, and cheaper and less chemicals than wipes.

Pidg, I'd also be interested in som FB groups, and any recommendations you have for real nappies. I really want to use them but we're in disposables as I've no idea what nappy to choose! T is 9lb now, so too small for the council 'trial pack' we can get here (£14 to borrow 8 nappy types and all the accessories for 3 weeks) as that starts at 10lb. We've spent £25 on disposables in 2 weeks though, so I want to move over ASAP.

HV came yesterday. I got a referral to a baby massage lady who'll come to our house to teach us some colic relief massage. There's nhs classes too, but they start at 4w and T is only 2w. He was weighed too and is up to 9lb 1oz from birthweight of 8lb 8oz. Knowing that had really helped with my anxiety over breastfeeding problems and his latch. As long as its only my pain I have to deal with, and not starving him, I can manage (though ofc I'm still going to sort out the pain and latch!).

Ikea group was ok, lots of older babies and everyone already knew each other. However, HV there showed me a new latch and was nice and easy to talk to. Will go back next week and make an effort to talk to people.

D has decided 4am is the time to wake up and refuse to go back in his Moses basket in the morning. I dozed off with him on my chest this morning - does that make me a bad and unsafe mummy? He won't be put to co-sleep in our bed so that's the only way I can get any rest after 4 am

Yay my mums friend has a baby swing we can borrow. Hopefully I will now be able to cook dinner in peace!

Honey J has decided our time is 4:30am. I ended up doing exactly the same as you. It's the only way to get any bloody sleep.

Oh Seymore that sounds horrid. No advice just big hugs sad

Waiting for the mw to come. I have to leave for the hospital in 45 mins, she has never been later tahn 11am before. Sods law!

Bellaboo123 Thu 10-Jan-13 12:03:49

Well we ended up having to go to children's a&e as she wldnt settle and was clearly getting more and more distressed. If she was older we'd have been able to give her calpol but docs had to prescribe due to her age. Seems happier today though. Mummy and daddy just whacked!!!

TT was spotted at birthing unit, if any doubt I'd get it checked out!

Good luck willyou!

Hope everyone has good days!

Stacks Thu 10-Jan-13 12:04:32

I don't think sleeping on your chest is too unsafe (T is currently sleeping on mine). The biggest risk is sofas isn't it? Last night T fell asleep on my chest - I then wriggled down to be laying on the bed, and slowly turned to my side, supporting him until he was laying on the bed beside me. Stayed close for 10m more, then moved away and covered him with his blanket. Worth a try (if your bed is safe for co sleeping)? He slept another 2h after that.

I'm glad she's happier Bella, I would have thought it would be better for them to give her a paracetamol suppository after they did it as it can't be very nice

WLmum Thu 10-Jan-13 12:06:18

Yep, baby wipes gave dd2 terrible sore bum, so I use reusable wipes and water - washed baby wipes are also super soft without the chemicals and easier than cotton wool.

I am about to start using my reusable nappies with dd3, having used them with dd1+2. I've got tots bots size 1 for now, but will move onto mother care smart nappies later as they are less bulky around the tummy. I Originally had a rep from 'the nappy lady' come out - it's free and then they get commission if you order through them. It was really helpful.

honey You're not a bad mummy, I sometimes fall asleep with DD on my chest too if it's the only way to calm her down after a feed. DP eventually puts her in the moses basket so she's not on my chest all night. The last few mornings DD has woken up at 5ish and seemed really alert so I put her next to me in bed and she usually falls asleep within 10mins. I feel like a bad lazy mummy as she would obviously want to play but I need to get more sleep. confused

I try to get ds to sleep on my chest but he hates it hmm

WLmum Thu 10-Jan-13 12:11:08

Sleeping on your chest isn't inherently unsafe, it's just the getting too hot that you have to watch out for so don't cover you both the duvet etc. Tabs has a sleeping bag so I would pull the duvet up over me, then put her on top.

WLmum Thu 10-Jan-13 12:12:34

Yep the early morning call here too - I was desperate for sleep so put her next to me where she could comfort suckle and I could doze!

utopian99 Thu 10-Jan-13 12:23:41

We have Ds in grobag on top of the duvet too... Although he is starting to sleep on his hammock more, hurrah! Had two major sleep stints last night and feeds at 12pm, 4am and 8am, feeling hopeful but probably just a fluke.

We're planning on swapping to reuseables soon now his cord has cord off. Have bumgenius with inserts and little lambs microfibre on the advice of the nappy lady (but bought on ebay..)

FriendofDorothy Thu 10-Jan-13 12:25:10

We are on wipes now. I just found the cotton wool and water two annoying as the cotton wool seemed to leave bits everywhere!

having trouble moving onto reusable nappies. they seem to be constantly soaked through though i layer up with microfibre liners and then a disposable thin liner on top and the disposable liner gets stuck to DS's balls. he gets way more upset as he feels wet all the time and i'm constantly changing him to avoid him sitting with a wet bum. i must be missing a trick, how can i continue to use reuseables if they're upsetting LO?
the amount of changes i need to do creates so much washing that i start to wonder about the green credentials too sad
how is anyone else getting on with them?
btw i have totsbots all-in-one and little lambs

PurplePidjin Thu 10-Jan-13 14:50:01

I've posted in the fb group, add me if you're fluff-curious and I'll add you to the secret fb group smile

www.fill-your-pants.com/cloth-nappy-trial/nappy-trial.html is a good trial pack.

Prunella, you won't need extra boosters with the tb, just tuck the tongue in and use. If you do put boosters in, put them inside the pocket - there's a fleece layer on top to wick away moisture.

What ll have you got?

We're in totsbot easyfits/ebay cheapie pockets stuffed with prefolds/Realeasy by Hip Hip Baby during the day, then i get 6+ hours from a large Cotton Bottoms prefold overnight (angel fold + nippa in case of poo) with whatever wrap comes to hand. Motherease Rikkis are meant to be the nuts but don't suit us - 3 for sale if anyone wants to try? I like nature babies and gen y so far...

pidj you are a proud baby-wearing hippy guru.. What are your favourite slings/carriers?? I want a wrap for mainly round the house so don't want to pay much.. Was it you who had a Victoria lady?? I've seen one on eBay and thought it looked good.. Can you feed in them?! Nothing is getting done on cluster feeding days and I'm praying for a miracle answer?! that prob doesn't exist

I've spent all day napping and eating and I'm still in my pyjamas grin

D has started fighting with my boob. He screams cos he's hungry then when I try and get him on he pushes away, hits my boob and shakes his head. Just started doing this today. Any ideas?

PurplePidjin Thu 10-Jan-13 15:43:09

I really am blush

Yeah, mine's a VSL. Stretchies are great for >6 month old babies - Cailin Bleu and Moby are other brands to investigate. Apparently it is possible to feed in one although i haven't tried. I kinda figure cluster feeding is nature's way of telling me to slow down a bit. That said, a brisk walk in it round the park and he's sparko for up to 2 hours (as long as i don't take him out!)

PurplePidjin Thu 10-Jan-13 15:44:21

Do i mean <6 month old babies? New borns, any way!

pidj sling guru- can I ask a question? D goes to sleep when we're out in the sling but if we're out at the min he's in his snowsuit so when we get home u have to wake him to take him out of the snowsuit so he doesn't overheat. Any ideas how I can keep him warm without having him in something which will be too warn inside? (My coat won't fit round him)

PurplePidjin Thu 10-Jan-13 15:55:39

Why does he need a snowsuit? R wears a babygrow, woolly hat and bootees - everything else is under 3 layers of thick jersey heated by me. Put a cardi on him this morning and we were dripping with sweat!

WLmum Thu 10-Jan-13 15:56:03

I've just got a moby for round the house, yesterday had dd in it a little lower than recommended and she was able to comfort nibble at the boob - I am very tall though! There are plenty of videos on u tube of how to bf in a stretchy wrap, I def intend to try it soon.

I kinda figured if we're out at this time of year he needs a snowsuit. In the pram he's in one then has blankets so I thought in a sling he'd need the snowsuit when it's cold. He's never seemed too warm when we're outside... Am I doing it wrong?!

Hello all.

Glad A is feeling a little better Bella. We've been done today. His tie was 100% and was stopping him from crying. He can definitely cry now! He's lying on me playing with his tongue smile must be trying to work out what's different. He ate his bottle in half the usual time and now looks like he's smiling definitely wind

In other news was signed off by midwife this morning. We're on our own!

PurplePidjin Thu 10-Jan-13 16:25:03

R screams if he's too hot so i doubt he'd tolerate a snowsuit in the sling. He has a fleece one for the car, and often yells till his blanket is taken off! I'm very south and it's about 10* here, things might change if/when the temperature drops.

In the buggy, he has a blanket under, then 2 thin layers plus coat, hat and bootees, then a blanket over but I've just bought a cosytoes type thing. We've used the buggy a grand total of 3 times, though...

honey I have Ethan in a snowsuit in the sling when we go out, I really feel the cold and would hate him to get cold. I get warm with him in it, but I think as they aren't moving they need that extra layer.

Secondsop Thu 10-Jan-13 16:27:32

Hello all. We have growth! He's put on almost 400g in a week - is 7lb 1oz now (3.2kg) and has leapt over his birth weight. Went to see the NCT breastfeeding woman and she agrees he has a tongue tie. I have to see the lactation consultant and get a referral to the tongue tie clinic. Thank you so much to those who helped me with information on this smile

Congratulations seconds. Well done grin

Thanks pidj and stacey. We're in the grim up north so it is quite a bit colder. Snow this weekend apparently sad oh well, I guess he will tell me if he's too hot or cold.

Yay good news Seconds and well done Z! I thought they might say I was being neurotic but they completely agreed that it needed snipping and that it would be causing all sorts of problems with his feeding. Hope your appointment comes through quickly smile

Clarella Thu 10-Jan-13 16:52:20

oh excellent news seconds!

honey, they loose most through their head so maybe a good thick fleecey hat plus grows, vest, cardi and warm bootees , mitts and I think he'll be fine? I didn't bother putting g's snow suit back on yesterday in ring sling and was fine, though I did wrap coat round him at times. the caboo is quite thick though too and you could tuck a small blanket or scarf over his back if u felt like it but I'm sure he'll be ok?

Clarella Thu 10-Jan-13 16:56:32

have to say though honey I have left g in his snow suit but opened up down the front if fast asleep and kept an eye on him before now.

Ah thanks pidj knew I could count on you. I'm thinking between a VSL and a moby but the Victoria is cheaper so I think I'm going to go with that one. Glad it Has your sealof approval. Literally want it to arrive NOW! She won't be put down and with an on the go lively 3year old this isn't an option.
Oh and great advice on layers ladies , tbh I've not even been wearing A coat recently,I think it's been really mild down here, although by the sounds of it the snow is on it's way (it never ever snows here it's always the one place that doesn't!)

Clarella Thu 10-Jan-13 17:08:08

ooh stacks I had the hv nursery nurse come round today to show me the baby colic massage routine (we don't have colic but do gas and wind - though is getting better) and we tried it at next change and it did seem to help shift a load of wind and poo! it does have to be done 3 times a day for 2 weeks, fir best benefits and when awake, not before or after a feed and on bare skin with oil so quite hard to fit in but we're going to try. I'd recommend asking hv if they can come and show people it if you've got wind/colic.

Clarella Thu 10-Jan-13 17:09:18

a secret to winding is having their back very straight apparently too

Clarella Thu 10-Jan-13 17:11:21

cookies the moby is very warm too, not sure about Victoria so you're probably ok out and about without snow suit

CODwidow Thu 10-Jan-13 17:19:22

I also just unzip snowsuit if we come in and she's asleep.

PurplePidjin Thu 10-Jan-13 17:20:31

Cookies, it's sling meet tomorrow if you want to play grin

Oh thanks clarella good to know.
COD I unzip snow suit too, in coffee shops etc as well as they're all so warm and don't dare disturb her. Glad I'm not alone!
What time pidj?? DD1s massive twat of a dad (i use this 'name' loosely!) is having her for a little bit tomorrow (first time since Boxing Day-, and was a good 3 weeks before that) ANYWAY... I could try and co-inside to pop over, and fit in a trip to MiL who will then love me..

PurplePidjin Thu 10-Jan-13 17:45:45

2-4, small dc welcome smile

We don't have sling meets round here sad at least not within 5 miles.

If the slings you're using are thick that prob makes a difference. I'm using a sling I was given, it's just a long length of thin jersey type fabric. This is in 2 layers over Ethan's back (the way I wrap, with him belly against my belly head on my chest) so not that warm really. I'm pretty lucky though I can manage to take him out of the sling without him waking, and I either just undo the snowsuit or take him out depending how our for the count he is.

PurplePidjin Thu 10-Jan-13 18:03:24

Stacey, mine's the same but the way i wrap gives a layer across each shoulder and one from bum to neck. Plus sleepsuit, top and trousers, plus my body heat. Plenty in the warm, damp south smile

I'm about to leave the boys to it for the evening <wibble> grot o'clock hasn't started yet, ds is asleep on dp <melts> there's a bottle sterilising and 3 cartons of formula. SIL, MIL and my mum will probably all call to check during the evening (secret hmm as dp is just as capable as me apart from the clumsy left side and inability to lactate!)

utopian99 Thu 10-Jan-13 18:12:12

O is now in his first cloth nappy. confused For some reason absurdly nervous about getting it wrong but have folded insert in its correct pocket and disposable liner sheet on top and poppered up nice and snug..

When out in the pram he stays in his vest and sleepsuit (has integral feet), and just goes in the footmuff with a hat on and seems perfectly warm. In his sling he goes in his snowsuit for outdoors plus hat. We have a Wallaboo Leaf wrap for the car seat so if that's going onto the pram frame he stays in that in vest/babygro with hat.. Can't recommend the wrap highly enough actually for the carseat - they can be used in prams too i think or just for around and about.

A friend gave us this wrap for indoors too - considering buying a second for when it's in the wash, best gift we've been given!

halesball Thu 10-Jan-13 18:23:30

Honey we've been having the same problem with breastfeeding were she pulls off and on and flails her hands and legs. I started swaddling her to stop her doing it the hv watched today and showed me a different way of holding her tbh it hasn't helped much.

Clarella Thu 10-Jan-13 18:31:50

honey would putting him in your shoulder and calming him or what ever might calm him before trying again help? I've started doing that with George if he does that and have to bob about with him for a few minutes ( and repeat! ) before trying again?

There are NO breastfeeding councillors in my area wtf?! sad

spotty really?! That's shit. Have you tried the helplines?

No I haven't I want someone out really, there are some peer support workers but I know them and don't want to show them my boobs close up (grin I know ridiculous).

Can you threaten to give up bfing spotty? Up here once you threaten that they seem to find help for you sharpish!

I've just asked a friend who she saw when she had problems so hopefully she can help if not I will have to try and get to the bf group (which only has peer support workers) one Monday but its at an awkward time!

ISpyPlumPie Thu 10-Jan-13 19:04:20

Fantastic news about the weight gain Seconds. Also good that the tt has been spotted.

Willyou - glad it all went well for J today.

Seymore - sounds like you're having a tough time <hugs>. Hope some of the tips on here help make things better soon.

Bellaboo123 Thu 10-Jan-13 19:48:01

Great news seconds! Hopefully you'll get a date soon.

Willyou I'm pleased it all went well.

A seems much better today!

Well DP and I aren't talking to each other - childish I know - we just keep pissing each other off, nearly 24hours now. Grrrr!

Spotty that's crap, I'd threaten to give up to u bet they find someone for you!

Seymore hope things are improving!

EggsMichelle Thu 10-Jan-13 19:48:41

How many hours of sleep during the day are your little ones getting? F has only slept about 2hrs broken up, the rest has been feeding, crying and looking around (in that order).

I've got a caboo and find we both get red hot if he has his snow suit on, will try sleep suit with trousers over. He is a very warm baby.

Those who are using gro bags, how are you getting on with them? F is only just big enough to use one, I've not tried it yet, but he sleeps on his side.

And finally, he smiled for the first time... To the bloody cat!

Ds sleeps all day maybe awake for three hours? Plus feeding. There's been one or two days when he's been awake longer.

Clarella Thu 10-Jan-13 19:55:30

*trying to tell myself I'm in the best place as dh goes to football and visiting capoeira friend goes to meet all other capoeira friends after training for drinks* I'm not envy I'm not envy I'm not envy.....

tbh reason all these 35 year old friends still play capoeira is as they don't have children so I know I'm in the best place really ..

eggs I put Ethan in a frontage yesterday for the first time as our boiler wouldnt turn on and the house was freezing. It was great it kept him really warm. So I put him in it last night and it was great for middle of the night feeds, as he was still warm when transferred to his Moses basket.

CODwidow Thu 10-Jan-13 20:31:34

Dh has gone out to play poker and usually I'm more than happy to be at home but tonight I'm feeling a little envy

At what point do you start worrying properly about the incessant screaming? He stops long enough to feed for 15-20 mins then starts with the bright red faced screaming again. Been like this all afternoon, fairly sure it's wind but getting stressed. As long as he's not hot and he stos screaming to feed he's prob bit got anything seriously wrong with him, has he? will return to pulling hair out now

Poor you honey sounds pretty classic for colic sad

We're having major issues tonight. In convinced I've got supply issue and ds now won't even try and latch just screaming. Dp not helping 'oh I think he's hungry' oh you think?!

Hugs spotty. Glad dp is being so helpful confused can you try expressing a bit to reassure yourself the supply is still there?

I don't know what to do - weve tried infacol, we've tried colief, we've tried gripe water and if I phone the gp again they'll probably think I've lost it

Well I can squeeze some out but not loads confused

Have you tried tiger in a tree hold?!

Tiger in a what now...? <scampers off to google>

As long as you're still getting some then even if its gone down you can get it back - I've been told. Can you use the pump regularly to get the supply up?

Dash is in a tree! Stopped crying momentarily!

I find it hard to find time to pump with dd. will have to find an expert.... Dp reckons a routine will help hmmhmmhmm

grin Yay

spotty I could kiss you. D stopped screaming for a full 5 mins!

FriendofDorothy Thu 10-Jan-13 21:24:25

My 3.5 year old nephew has got chicken pox - he came out in spots last Sunday. His 22 month old sister has not yet come down with it.

Is Edward likely to be immune as I have had chickenpox and I am breastfeeding?

DO you think i should avoid seeing the kids or not just in case Edward isn't immune?

FoD I would say avoid until they aren't contagious. It's possible to get chicken pix more than once so I doubt your LO has immunity.

I love how people help each other on this thread <warm fluffy feelings>

Secondsop Thu 10-Jan-13 21:55:14

spotty re supply - in the last few days, since I've been hand-expressing more to compensate for the extra bottles, I've noticed my breasts are getting FAR more engorged between expressions. So for 6 weeks poor little Z has obviously not been feeding from them effectively, but even at this stage it seems that I've been able to increase supply by increasing demand. So I'm sure you will be fine.

Finding time to express IS hard though, I agree - it's been pretty punishing for me to bottle feed and wind Z and then to express as well, especially at night. I find it easier to do it by hand than with the pump - I have a bottle next to me and squeeze into it when I have a minute, and then after 5-6 hours have passed I add the contents of that bottle to what's in the fridge. I have a medela swing pump but tbh I think I get more by hand - I use it just to give my hand a rest now, pretty much. Plus rigging up the pump is such a performance and needs time set aside, unlike just giving myself a quick squeeze!

It's hard enough on dd actually feeding ds though that's when she always plays up. I think his latch could be the problem confused

Did you try nipple shields spotty?

Thanks dudes, I'm well and truly chuffed with the outcome. My stomach was churning while they did it though <soppy mummy> He will not go in his Moses basket now though. Absolutely hates it.

Sorry to hear you're struggling with the colic honey glad the tiger hold worked even if only for a short time.

Can you not express am from the second breast while feeding DS spotty? Sorry if that's a stupid question. I had a friend who did that but I'm not sure if that was after a certain amount of time (ie when the baby was x weeks). I know how hard it is, I just couldn't cope with the relentless bottlefeed, sterilise, express, sterilise. And that's without adding sore boobs/nipples into the equation.

Yeah I did but I haven't had any pain and after I used them he got lazy with his latch so I haven't used them since smile

I need two hands for both ATM blush

We haven't had any pain but they really helped with D's latch. Good luck!

spotty I don't know how you're managing all that #superwoman!
honey colic sucks -arse- the only way I used to be able to calm down dd1 who would scream and scream for hours would be to put her in her car seat and rock the fuck out of her! -disclaimer, pretty sure any Health professional wouldn't approve/recommend but it was the only damn way! I was pretty vigorous blush Good luck grin

PurplePidjin Thu 10-Jan-13 23:39:02

Dp is exhausted but, apart from some spectacular vomiting (2 outfit changes, got it on my pants! Think his eyes are bigger than his tummy wrt formula) my lads survived without me for 4 hours grin

They're both fast asleep, first time R hasn't fed to sleep. I leaked all over my top, teens all think he's fab (pics on phone), I've pumped off 5 1/2oz (and leaked another oz all over the bed and my clothes) and dp is rightly very proud of himself - as am i.

Must try and sleep hmm