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The other October 2012 baby thread!(357 Posts)
Sorry for lack of witty title! 4 days post c-section = lack of sense of humour
Helloooo. [echos] is everyone still wondering around with match sticks holding their eyes open?
Can't wait to catch up with you all.
Marking place and will be back!
Anyone else have a baby that doesn't know how to go to sleep?
When did you all start leaving the house after your new arrivals? Particularly those of you with c-sections?
Starting to feel a bit claustrophobic here!
pinpan do they sell 'Ewan the sheep' in NZ? It is a magical sleep inducing device that I thoroughly recommend!
thunder I left the house on the Tuesday. ( had emcs on the Saturday came home on the Sunday. ) to take dd to visit my grandparents.
I seem to have recovered much quicker this time. I'm lucky. I was still in hospital at that point last time round.
Where can I find Ewan the sheep??? [Desperate face emotion]
Marking place! I've had a Ewan on my Amazon wish list - really do they truly work? Should I get one? Desperately tired here
alternative to Ewan which was good. Pricey though - we got as a gift.
Ewan definitely works for us! I was sceptical, but little thunder seems to love him...he can be screaming one minute and asleep and contented the next.
I co-sleep with Wriggler - he's not such a wriggler now he's out.
In fact he's just like his older brother was - very silent and still sleeper which is bloody terrifying! I still have nightmares about the time I woke up in the middle of the night and was sure DS1 had stopped breathing - shook him (gently!) awake and he was ok - but I don't know if he would have been if I hadn't woken up, iyswim.
That way we get a reasonable amount of sleep, although he's still napping a fair bit during the day as well. Still need to shift his sleep patterns around a little bit.
The sore belly - it feels like muscular soreness, rather than cramps - across my lower belly. No idea if I pulled something or if it's residual internal bruising (I never bruised on the outside) from the ECV; or it might be related to the fact that my symphisis pubis is still clunking like a bitch .
Going out post-birth - had him on wed 10/10, came home on fri 12/10 - stayed in all weekend (got very blue) and then escaped the house on wed 17/10 by myself (not my choice, DH refused to take me shopping, said he'd look after the baby and I could go by myself) because I was desperate to get out of the house by then.
This week, am back to doing all the running around with DS1, because DH is back at work and MIL had to have an angioplasty for angina - luckily she's out of hospital now (was in from last Thursday to yesterday) but can't drive for 3d. I'm ok so long as I don't try and do too much - if I do, my belly hurts and I slow right down through knackeredness.
Does Ewan the sheep and/or Prince Lionheart do good white noise? I'd have to order them from amazon uk I think, if they deliver overseas. Sounds like a good thing though. I don't want to jinx it, but the womble has just gone to sleep in her bassinet/pram for the second time running, with the aid of the cooker hood fan on max. Partly the white noise and partly me getting better at spotting the two minute window for putting her down while awake but tired...
bet it doesn't work next time
I didn't go out except to the GP or the hospital for 3 weeks, but that's because my infected stitches made it really sore to walk, or do anything other than lie down or sit on my special cushion. I did 'leave the house' every day but usually only as far as the mailbox... I've been out properly every day since then though, and today I walked over a mile with the pram
though it's a bit sore now. Leaving the house is awesome. What little things seem like victories these days!
Wow Pinpan - I'm well impressed with you walking over a mile already!
Amazon.co.uk doesn't deliver toys to Australia/NZ, only books/ DVDs/CDs, iirc. Amazon.com might though (and it would still be cheaper than sourcing it in NZ, I bet! Definitely would be cheaper than Australia)
Found you - dropped off the last thread. How is everyone? DD has reflux so settling her after feeds is hard work - can be an hour and a half from starting a feed to falling properly.
DD was born Sunday night, went home Monday, quick trip to hospital on a
Tuesday then out to register her and do some shopping (needed tiny baby size clothes) n the Wednesday. We go out every day for a walk, plus 3 groups/coffee meet ups a week
Thumb, my walk was in two bits - there and back again, iyswim. Definitely the furthest I've gone in a month though! Will have a look on amazon.com for ewan.
Hey, Micky! My womble is a spiller so she can be tough to settle too, though I think it isn't reflux, just greed. I've been trying to feed her up on one side at a time rather than offering both, so she gets all the calories in less volume, which seems to help - she put on 100 g between Friday and Tuesday so she's definitely eating enough! Sometimes she just wants more though, and invariably aims it right down my cleavage as soon as she's done.
Pinpan It has different types of noise, a womb heartbeat, waves, and a tune. Obviously, can't promise it will work for you, but it does wonders for us. Apparently there is an app on iPhone which plays white noise - could you try something like that maybe?
Think I might venture out of bed tomorrow! Since getting home on Sunday I've pretty much confined myself to bed rest with the odd trip to the loo/wander round upstairs! My c-section scar is hurting so much less now so think its time to try the stairs again.
Going to try the white noise on the iphone tonight - womble is very discerning and has previously rejected 'fake' white noise, but it's worth another try. It's a shame we don't have an old fashioned radio that we can just detune! She's also drawn to the light so not sure the light on ewan will do it for her - might try the slumber bear if I can find one. Everything is worth a try, right?!
Good luck getting out of bed Thunder. It is great when you start feeling more human again - makes the hard work of feeding and soothing a baby much easier.
still hard though
Can I join?
12 days post cs, baby arrived at 35/40 so we spent 1 week in hospital as she was in scbu.
Ewan doesn't have a light; but that is a cute giraffe!
Welcome empty, how is your recovery going? I'm 5 days post c-section but luckily had no issues so was home after 48 hours
Pinpan, Baby Lite doesn't seem to do fake white noise either but loves Ewan's light and gazes at it until she falls asleep. She's quite a noisy breather and you can hear her breathing calm right down when she turns to look at him.
Like Thumbwitch, I am back to my usual routine with DS - nursery runs, toddler groups, birthday parties, NCT meet-ups etc. Baby Lite sleeps non-stop (in the day) though so falls in easily with our plans. She has her alert awake time between 7pm and 10pm so sits in her chair while we have supper and then watches TV with us until bedtime. DS is not allowed any TV so would be very miffed if ever he came back down in the evening and caught us .
Hmm I must have an old or broken Ewan as ours definitely doesn't have a light!
Found you all!
Re going out after the birth, born late eve on wed 10th, i stayed in until Tuesday 15th when I did the school run. I was determined to have a few days indoors in pjs this time, as it was my older two had a sickness bug in that time so it wasn't very relaxing! Two weeks today since baby was born, I feel mostly recovered although my lower back and hips ache if I walk for any distance. If it's still bothering me at the six week check I will speak to the GP about it.
Marking place, will be back later!
Marking place, thank god I've found you!
Day 4 and feeling like everything feels so hard, this parenting malarkey is such a roller coaster! Baby Loopy is finding hard to settle in cot, preferring to sleep on DHs very cosy chest instead - any tips?
The other issue is that now we're home, he doesn't want to latch. Cue 13 hours of no feeding & slightly dehydrated/jaundiced baby Had to do an emergency run for formula this morning which he's taken to but I'm concerned going back to breast will be all the more tougher. Got a BF counsellor popping over tomorrow.
I'm trying to be kinder to myself but just want to find a dark corner to cry in...
Loopy, is baby loopy sleeping in a big cot or a crib/bassinet/basket? Our womble barely slept the first night home, and the midwife suggested it was because the bassinet seemed so huge. We put a rolled up towel around the sides and bottom to make it much more snuggly, barely bigger than her, and it made all the difference in the world. Had to take it out last week because she is so huge now! I'm off to a family centre with sleep/settling experts today so I will share any gems that I learn when I get home. Good luck with the latching.
It's taken me all evening to read the thread so far...
I left the house when DD was 4 days old. Was already running round like a crazy person
as per usual then at home but, strangely, still found that I bled really heavily after going out. And that was only a walk round the supermarket.
Since then, we've been all over. DD and I went out alone today for the first time Nipped to the sainsburys toy sale and to visit a family friend.
Loopy For the first couple of nights I slept propped up on the sofa (sitting up position with feet on the footstool) with a duvet and DD sleeping on my chest. Not advised by professionals I'm sure but we all had lots of sleep. A few days further in and she now sleeps in both her Moses basket and pram carrycot. It doesn't last long but it is hard... But worth it.
With DS, I found the next few weeks the hardest. With the first rush of visitors gone, DH back at work... Real life sets in and newborns are lovely but they don't do much. Once DD starts sming, I'll be reassured that I am doing everything right!
I was out of bed after 4/5 hours as little one was in scbu and I needed to see her and manoeuvring a wheelchair about the place was too tricky, and painful.
I was in for a week and mobilised well whilst in, and have been out and about since being home. I even managed the 2 mile round school run Tuesday. I have recovered much easier after this cs than the previous 2, no swelling, no pain after a few days really just the uncomfortable feeling when getting on / off bed.
I do have to keep reminding myself not to do too much, as I don't want to be set back. Plus I'm a midwife and should now better!
Loopy have you tried skin to skin to help with the feeding? I'm assuming your milk has come in, you can always drip some milk into his mouth to keep him hydrated too. Are you feeling engorged at all?
Ooh a MW on the thread...how useful
Been up and about a bit more today...might try going outsie tomorrow! MW came today for our 5 day check...Theo just a pound under his birth weight which is reassuring.
Ooh post natal thread how lovely!! Not sure what to suggest loopy. Do I have a bf counsellor u can access to talk to about it? I know they're supposed to be fantastic.
Currently feeding baby elvis in our own bed at home. It's lovely. After 4 days in hospital it's nice to relax and do it properly and she is def feeding better. MW visiting today up check weight so FX and thanks to all of u that helped me on FB it was so reassuring.
We are loving having her here and DH is obsessed as he missed out while we were in hospital. Hope everyone is enjoying the snugly newborn cuddles
Sleep peeps said today the key to settling in the cot/crib etc is how you put them down. Hug them across your chest lying sideways, head almost in your armpit (bound to put them to sleep ), nice n tight. When they are calm, put them down gently, keeping them sideways and maintaining the hug on front and back with your arms. Keep them there a while, then gently roll them onto their backs and do some more patting. Then tuck in, and jiggle/pat as necessary. Avoiding going straight from a hug to lying on backs is supposed to help. Of course, the womble behaved perfectly while in public...
...However, she did do some massive spilling after waking up and eating (and made me cry), and the nurse says she has a tongue tie which can cause the gag reflex and hence all the spillage and unsettledness. Quite annoyed that no one has spotted this before as I've been saying for 4 weeks that she spills heaps, even though she's gaining weight well. My boobs have been sore the last week or so, and I get white nipples that are slightly lopsided after a feed so it all makes perfect sense. I should have complained more but the soreness has only been recent. Being referred to a lactation consultant now but I don't know how long it'll take to get anything seen/done. Lots of our feeding times feel a bit like a battle at the moment, which isn't great for bonding.
I didnt really get out for a few days after I had ds, prob more due to laziness though than anything else. Dp did the school run etc. After a few days though I did start to feel a bit like a prisoner...
Ds is 7 wks now.. I know he's not technically an oct baby, but have been with you all so far, hope you don't mind if I stay??
We had our 6am check yesterday, William passedwith flying colours, and I am booked in to get another coil put in... Anyone dtd yet?? I'm not letting dp anywhere near me til I've got my coil sorted! I had my 2other dc very close together and don't want a repeat!!!
William smiled at me last night-a proper wide grin!! Yay
Hey, finally had a chance to say hello on here!
As for going out after the birth, he was born early hrs of Thurs 18th, we walked v slowly home that afternoon (usually a 5 min walk, took longer). And walked back to A&E on Saturday 20 for a jaundice test. Then on Monday had to go to a local children's centre to see the MWs. The walk was toooooo far, i was exhausted!!!
micky i have a similar problem - DS has lots of wind, and he also spits up due to greed pinpan. Takes ages to settle him and get the wind up. We've found that putting a hot water bottle in his bed means he wont wake up at night when we put him down if he's happily sleeping on me or DP.
Oh, and of course taking the hot water bottle out when he goes in!
6wk check obviously-6am check would be torture!!! ;)
I totally missed the second page of the thread - babybrain kicking in i think!!
Pinpan - interesting that your DD has been diagnosed with tongue tie - but how annoying it took so long to pick up. the MW noticed a slight tongue tie before DS left hospital - but as he's feeding well and I'm not in pain they won't do anything unless I really push for it. Sounds like you're having a tough time though and it would definitely be worth sorting it out. THanks for the sleep tips - i will try them out!
For me, it's not the feeds which are the problem but the endless time it takes to get rid of the wind... no one told me about that beforehand!!
babybrain great news on the 6 wk check! and a proper smile too - I can't wait for one of those!
Hello ladies! Re the sleeping have you tried swaddling. I got the Mothercare Miracle Swaddle (loads on eBay) and Fox is regularly sleeping 5+ hours at night. Has really worked for us!
Marking place, will check up properly
if when madam decides to have a nap this afternoon...
RnB I had a quick look at those when you mentioned the other day... Got side tracked so am off to check again.
We're usually cbeebies fans in this house but have changed channels and ds has been sat watching Peppa Pig for ages... And dd is sleeping... Who said this toddler and newborn lark was hard work?! and at so much tv for ds!
Bloody tongueties get on my nerves, literally! Bloody paeds appt is taking forever to come through as well - best laid plans gone wrong again, this was supposed to have been dealt with before I left the blasted hospital but here we are, nearly 2w later and still no fecking appt.
Still have a fair amount of pain at the start of feeding, but Wriggler is feeding better than his brother did - and then spitting a lot of it back up (which his brother never did). Lots more air going down, so lots of colicky pain and farting (niiice) and some trouble winding him as well. Hoping the tonguetie snip will sort all this out.
Newton - I preferred Milkshake in the UK (ch 5) to Cbeebies - lots more shows that DS liked, and I quite loved the smiles on the presenters' faces! I think that must have been the key hiring factor - massive smiles . Despite my best efforts, Peppa Pig is now DS's favourite show <sigh> but I indulge myself by complaining about her behaviour and George's whining to DS, so he learns that he's not to copy them! . We get a lot of UK children's tv shows over here, and most of the Canadian ones that are shared between the UK, Canada and Australia as well. We get Far East cartoons too - Japanese, Korean, all translated into English of course - and of course the infamous Dirt Girl World (which I think is actually Aussie, but is a collaboration with Canada/UK).
It's interesting which shows are dubbed - I have no idea why, in the UK, Bottle Top Bill and Bananas in Pyjamas are put into UK accents (both Aussie) where The Koala Brothers isn't - just bizarre! And things like Olivia and Finley the Fire Engine we get in the original US/Canadian accent here, but it's dubbed into UK accent in the UK. Most odd.
Sorry, that was a bit epic!
Thumb Your knowledge of global kids TV is impressive! I don't mind cBeebies, I like the lack of adverts especially! Dirt Girl World has been on a few times...it's bloody awful isn't it!
Well we had Peppa Pig and Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom until 5 when DS had a complete meltdown and we chucked him in the shower and into bed. <Peace and quiet>
DD is still cluster feeding so hopefully she will have put more weight on when MW comes back tomorrow (She wasn't back to her birth weight at day 10 so they came back at day 13 and they're coming back again which is day 17!) <fingers crossed>
That's funny about watching tv-after I've gone to bed in the evenings dp likes to get some work done, and rather than leave ds in a room on his own he puts march of the penguins on for him he'll probably grow up to be the next David Attenborough or something!!!!
Since we're on the subject, it would be great to get your thoughts on tongue tie ladies - i know that DS has a 'mild' tongue tie, they spotted it as they were doing the check at hospital but have said that since he's feeding ok it won't matter. I have mild discomfort at the start of feeds but it can be difficult for him to latch. He also has terrible wind which can be hard to get up, v frequent hiccups, coughing and choking while feeding and the odd projectile vomit afterwrds . And i get same lopsided nipples with white tops after a feed too...
I'm not sure how much of the above might be down to the tongue tie or is just normal? And i've also read that if their suck isn't efficient milk supply can dwindle after 3 months when it relies less on hormones. Basically, is it worth pushing to get it snipped?
Hopefully going to a local breastfeeding support group on Monday... but any advice or thoughts you have in the meantime would be great!
sorry to post only about me... hope everyone is doing well!
goodsense I used to get lopsided nipples (sort of lipstick shaped, iykwim?) until I started aiming my nipple more towards the roof of DD's mouth. There's a good diagram on handout 31, "When Latching" here of which part of the nipple/breast should be in the baby's mouth. No personal tongue-tie experience, so can't advise on the rest, sorry.
Anyone else got a toddler as well as a newborn? I just had to clean poo off 2.7yo DD's bum, sheets, pillow and clothes (nappy leaked in bed) while DD2 screamed for food It was horrible to leave her crying
and all three of us were in tears at one point but I couldn't leave DD1 running round with a shitty bum. Gah.
Hello all. Sorry I have not posted for ages. Really busy with DD1 and 2. Going away to a cottage for half-term tomorrow. I will try to catch up soon.
Earnest Yes me.... It's not been too bad in the day time so far but DS (just 2) still wakes up in the night so I'm frequently up for hours at a time with him.
Last night his nappy leaked (just wee, thankfully!) and he was screaming when DH went near him (they both wind each other uo when tired) so I had to change him and calm him down, which meant cutting DD's feed short.
Then DS and I had to get into the spare bed as I tried to get him back to sleep...
Then DD woke again...
By the time I got back in bed from initially waking with DD at 2 am, it was 5:36............. I was having a "morning off" this morning and mum was taking DS which meant us getting him breakfasted and at hers for 7:30.
It is awful having one of them cry whilst you see to the other but I am trying to tune it out and/or do what I can for DS with DD in a sling.
I am also doing as much to get ready for the next bit of the day as possible...for example, I know DS will happily play after breakfast so I have been making us some sandwiches and putting them in the fridge so I know that if DD is cranky at that time, I can at least feed the poor boy with minimum effort!
Little of that helps with poo-on-hands.... Sorry! <<Prays DS never does this>>
oh my goodness newton and earnest that is full on!!! You are amazing for coping with all that! It makes just one dc sound like a walk in the park <makes note to self to try to wait some time before having second child >
earnest thanks for the link - lots of good stuff on there! I've been trying that positioning and it looks correct but i think i need an expert to check and give advice.
RnB, I have tried using swaddles but the womble spits up so often that I end up resorting to a blanket swaddle anyway because all the specially designed ones are covered in milk.
I have gone back to basics
again with latching and managing to get a better latch, but still getting a bit of the lopsided-ness. I went into the GPs on Friday afternoon to pick up a prescription, after the womble had refused to go to sleep and made me cry heaps, and my lovely GP saw me and took me aside and gave me a hug, let me tell her all about the nurse talking about tongue ties, and said to bring the womble in on Monday and she'll check her over thoroughly as well. I've been into the medical practice so much in the last month that they all know me and the womble by name now, and ask after us both tenderly when I ring up! Anyway, goodsense, will let you know if anything useful comes up with regards to the spitting up etc. Womble definitely does it more when she has just had a big sleep, early afternoon and in the middle of the night, so I think it's partly a greed/must eat as quickly as possible thing.
On the plus side, we had a classic cluster feed from 6-10 pm last night instead of 3 hours of screaming, followed by sleeping through to 6 am with a single feed at 1.30 - 2.30 am. I could cope if she did that every night
especially as I have a Quantum Leap boxset to get through, every bit as good as I remember
RnB Am currently winning at 99p on one of those swaddles on eBay... Worth a try to get DD sleeping longer at night (even though she's the least of my worries- see previous post!)
Goodsense 1 DC, especially when they are so little, is really easy I wish we'd have done more when DS was little and easily transportable! We did have a lovely morning at soft play yesterday though. DD slept the whole time so I got to do something just me and DS and it really didn't feel so stressful!
Earnest thanks for posting that link; those tips have helped me fix a massively painful latch I had on the right hand side! Life-saving
Baby had his first bottle this evening. MW recommended I started expressing to get my supply up (post c-section) then DH has started doing the 11pm feed. Means I can go to bed at 9 and sleep at least til 12...bliss. Hopefully one feed at 4am will be us until morning!
Goodsense - Wriggler has a minor posterior tonguetie, same as DS1 had (I got DS1's snipped at 2wo) and what you're describing is exactly what I'm going through now as well. I have a referral to see the paed some time in the next week, I hope - and will be pushing very strongly to get it snipped as most, if not all, of the symptoms you describe can be caused by tonguetie. It made a big difference to DS1 and I'm hoping for a similarly good outcome with Wriggler.
Eurgh to pooey toddlers - I'm glad Ds1 is nearly 5!
Hi all. Interesting to read all your bf tips and that link with diagrams is useful. DD has out on 7oz in 4 days so clearly BFing is working. I enjoy doing it but just wondering if its normal for it to hurt when she first latches on? That initial bite down? It's really sore but gets better once she starts munching, I just feel the pull on the nipple. Am bruised as last night I tried feeding lying down but I was obviously sleepy as she wasn't in properly.
Finally got a chance to get on here, so nice to hear everyone's news!
We're 6 days in and am loving it. Amelie is pretty chilled, just working on the latch. Last night was a bit tough, she was feeding every hour or so, then at 5 she was hungry but would suck a few times and then fall asleep. If you put her down she would cry again. This went on till 6.30 when she finally fed. Really hope it's not the same tonight.
Will namecheck next time but just wanted to say hi.!
Elvis, in the early days particularly, it does feel painful/weird in the first few seconds. Advice given to me was take a deep breath, relax your shoulders and count to ten. If it still hurts, then it's a bad latch and worth doing again. If not and you're just feeling the pulling (like you are) then it's all good. For me, that feeling passed away after the first week or so - it's to do with the milk coming down, I think.
Womble is going through a frustrating time of refusing to actually latch on at all, but getting frantic because she doesn't have boob. Does anyone else's baby go from waking up to absolutely crazy with hunger within about 10 seconds? It's a nightmare. She used to do feeding cues in her sleep so I could at least be prepared, but now she just goes from "I'm asleep, go away" to "oh god, you should have fed me five minutes ago."
Evening all. I am in a lovely cottage in Dorset for the next week. Getting here was stressful - the car was stuffed full. DH has taken DD1 to a local fair so I have a couple of quiet hours with pip. She is more sleepy than I would like. Hope I am not in for an all night party.
I am on my phone so can't easily look back to check who wrote things. Some one mentioned coping with a toddler plus baby. DD1 is 4 but there have been a few 'interesting' moments. One night DD1 started vomiting at 11pm. Both DH and I were up until 2.30am with her (DH cleaning up DD and me cleaning her bed) then pip wanted a feed at 3am. Had to keep DD1 home from school for 2 days. Don't know how I would have coped if DH had not been home.
Pip is on infant Gaviscon for her reflux. It is helping but is such a pain to give to her. We have had to experiment with doses and how to actually get it into her. Adding it to a little expressed milk seems to be working best.
Pip does crack me up when feeding her. Especially early morning feeds. It's almost like it is her first experience of bf every morning. She bobs her head about, eventually latches on, sucks a little then comes off and smacks her lips together. It is like she is sampling a bottle of wine and deciding if it is acceptable. Finally she will dive at me with a growl and feed like mad. Does any one else have lo with daft feeding rituals?
Pinpan, your womble sounds very much like DD1. She would go from asleep to screaming hungry with no warning. She was also more uncomfortable in the evening. We always said she was a drama queen and still is. Everything is either totally wonderful or a complete tragedy. However she is great fun, full of life, loves music and dancing and I wouldn't change her at all (wish she had an off switch occasionally).
thumb thanks for the comparison - I'm definitely going to get it checked asap. Let's hope they consider it 'severe' enough to have snipped... Although pukiness has reduced a bit today apart from projectile vomit yesterday!
shellwe night time hourly feeds sound tough - I've been getting that the last 2 nights from 7.30-1.30am but then get to sleep apart from one night feed at 4.30/5.
On phone so my brain cant remember any more namechecks Hope everyone else is good and managing just enough sleep! I'm going back to sleep now- hopefully DS will not wake up when I put him to bed...
Much better night, feeds at 1, 4 and 6ish but she actually latched on properly so wasn't a faff.
How did everyone find the clocks going back.
We are going to attempt Sunday lunch out today with MIL and FIL. Hoping not to have to BF out, I managed when we went to Greenwich on Friday but that was just with DP. Not sure about in front of the inlaws!
Goodsense Hope you get the tongue tie sorted. At antenatal they said it was v common and important to get it identified and sorted. Apparently MWs just used to break it with their nail after birth!
Mmm, 2 am feed finished and womble snoozing again (I hope). Hope you're all having a good weekend!
Hi All, been very absent
I need advice!! Baby Loopy was a touch jaundiced & my milk wasnt in on day 4 so I had to use formula to avoid him getting dehydrated & back in hospital. Then when my milk came in, he got stressed out at the breast and I couldnt find any advice anywhere on how best to breastfeed baby not just latch, position etc but the situation itself. Its all very well advising you change your babys nappy pre-feed but then they are so stressed out, they wont eat anything. Which then makes the bottle an easy solution. So now I feel a failure for relying on the easier solution, not what actually is best for Baby Loopy
Has anyone got any thoughts on re-establishing my breast milk supply?
Apologies for not name-checking or looking back on whats been happening with everyone else, feeling rather overwrought & I'm missing out with everyone's news.
Hi Loopy, my own BFing experiences have not been trouble-free, but I'll advise as much as I can I tend to do one boob, then nappy change, then offer other boob (or halfway through bottle, along with winding, if bottle feeding). As you say, when thy wake up hungry they don't want to wait while you change their nappy!
For boosting supply, I know some people recommend just spending a day in bed with your baby close by, cuddling and feeding and not doing much else. The best thing to get your supply up is feeding as much as possible, as the baby sucking will stimulate milk production. It helps if your DH/DP is available to bring you food and drinks (and look after any older DCs); if not you could have some sandwiches and snacks prepared in advance to make sure you don't go hungry.
Please try not to feel like you've failed. Everything you've done so far was what was best for your baby at the time. And it's not too late to get back to BFing, with the right support.
Hi Loopy, sympathies! I never change the nappy first - either do it half way through, or at the end. There's no way the womble would wait that long for food, plus she usually does her business while eating. Earnest is right that feeding is the best way of stimulating supply, but you could also express as well if baby Loopy isn't hungry enough to want to just eat all day. Here you can hire
industrial hospital grade breast pumps from pharmacies if you don't have one, don't know if the same is true in the UK. Good luck - it's hard work, but it'll be worth persevering if you feel that it's worth it, which it sounds like you do!
Thanks both - don't know where I read about changing a nappy before a feed but it's never done us any favours And Baby Loopy usually does his business during a feed as well - as if he's making room!
Thanks for the support ladies - it's so hard to find advice that's objective & unbiased rather pro this or that.
I do have an electric pump & started today to express - think it's starting to impact on my hormones as felt uterus contracting afterwards
Hi another one for changing nappy half way thru- mini elvis hates having her nappy changed! Hope u are all ok. Am nursing a cracked nipple from where she had a little nibble. Owwww! Am rating that side for 24 hours.
Finding it all a little over whelming tonight. Can't get her to settle but my mum is here helping which is amazing. Hurrah for mums
Hoorah for mums indeed - mine gets here 3 weeks on Friday and I can't wait!
Oh yes, hurrah for mums! Mine's arriving on 12 November, it feels like ages away.. But since we had to book Flights in advance it cant be helped. MIL is arriving on Monday for a week so I'm hoping she'll be hands on and help out!
loopy sorry to hear you're finding bfing difficult but definitely don't feel like you've failed. Hope the expressing and skin to skin works, keep going with it all and I'm sure it will!
DS has kept us up half the night so far, feeed after feed. And he won't settle in his cot so currently he's asleep on me. As soon as I put him in he wakes- I've got to get this sorted soon... Not sure how though. And, it seems we both have thrush and I think my stitches are infected so a trip to the doc tomoro as well as the MW for 10 day check. Not feeling too bad but how annoying!!!
Bye for now. Zzzz...
Oh lordy goodsense, major sympathies! Make sure they take a swab of the stitches so you definitely get the right antibiotics if they are infected. And good luck with the settling - it does get better! If you can get him to fall mostly asleep in your arms while you are standing rather than sitting, the transition to bed might be easier? Also, try sticking a hot water bottle or wheat bag in the cot so it is warmed up before he goes down. I reckon it's all about fooling them into thinking that the hug has not been taken away!
goodsense I also could have written your post. Baby Loopy spends half his time in the carrycot & the other half in our arms/with us in bed I've tried to make carrycot cosier, we always put a hot water bottle in first to warm the bed before he goes in, he hates swaddling but just keeps waking himself up & wants attention. He's so tiny & lovable, it's impossible for us to resist but realise this is not a long term solution!
I've been trying to express regularly & although my breastmilk hasn't dried up completely, it's definitely reduced. But if its still there, it's better than nothing. Not sure whether to keep the expressed stuff & give Baby Loopy a little of it, supplemented by formula or what else I can do with it. It's only 50ml daily at the moment, doesn't seem worth doing anything with?
50 ml a day is better than nothing, I reckon Loopy - and if you've got it you might as well use it.
The womble just went to bed at 8.45! Thank you twinkle twinkle little star on the tinny baby monitor speakers. Hope it works as well at midnight and 4 am...
You can add the exposed milk together to make a whole feed. As long as the first lot hasn't been in the fridge for 5 days I think..
Omg I've just been to the docs for a smear and to have swabs taken so I can have a coil put in-she said that my vaginal wall is slack and I may prolapse !!! Omg!!! Yuk.
Can you do exercises for that, babybrain?
Loopy, I agree 50ml a day is better than nothing - definitely use it
I have been given an appt to see the paed for DS2's tonguetie - 20th frigging November. Poor little sod, he's actually getting worse - latch is worse now, more clicking, more air - chuckin up more milk and so on. I am utterly pissed off about it but there's not a lot I can do, apart from ringing and begging for a cancellation (which, no doubt, there will be about 100 other people doing the same)
I'm having to shorten his feeds, sit him up after for a while, catch the right time to do the winding so it's air and not milk'n'air - and of course therefore do more feeds.
On a brighter note though - my bum isn't completely broken, I just have a haemorrhoid. Phew! Although it's still a serious chore going to the loo. I have a scrip for cream, just need to get it.
I am being mean to DH. I don't exactly mean to but it's just frustration and tiredness - he's taking it fairly well but it's kinda his own fault - he tells me he's "tired". He tells me he thinks he might have a haemorrhoid himself. He tells me that it's hard work holding DS2 for any length of time. I want to kick him! Argh!!
Loopy, babybrain is right that you can add the milks together - I was told that you should refrigerate the new milk first before adding it to the already cool milk though, rather than just topping up the cold bottle with warm, new milk. Have no idea why! Also, our official word is that breast milk will last 48 hours in the fridge, though the lactation consultant at the hospital said it will be fine for a week, they just like to be cautious with their recommendations.
Sucks that you have to wait until 20th November, thumb! My GP said I was going to see someone on Wednesday but they never rang to confirm a time. Going to call the surgery in the
civilised time of the morning and give them a poke.
Damn, I'm sick of twinkle twinkle little star.
Sorry for the delay to me appearing here! I've been struggling a but emotionally with everything. Lack of sleep seriously affects how I can process emotions!
Might just be lurking about for a few days, DH back at work yesterday and I'm pretty freaked out looking after minisooty on my own all day. I feel I should be supermum, perfect house etc but minisooty does not like being put down so I'm kinda stuck to the couch a lot!
Hope everyone is doing well
Hello everyone, just finishing night feed.
Been too busy to post - DD1 on half term from nursery so have 2 wee girls to look after, coinciding with a busy week at work for DH so no help there. Am lucky that he is flexible normally (PhD student) so really missing him this week. Luckily have some other friends in same situation so meeting up when can.
Weesooty - my sympathies with the tiredness emotions. LO def have growth spurt here. But -enjoy some sofa time while you can! Don't worry about the house. The only thing I think is really important is trying to get out at least once per day, even round the block etc for done fresh air. IME it REALKY helps put a fresh perspective on tiredness. It's crazy how much brighter we feel on more sleep-filled nights, I remember with dd1 on those days noticing birds singing and being full of the joys whereas on sleepless nights just feeling teary and
Like I could go nothing right. Try to sleep when they do - still possible when it's DC1!
PS Happy Halloween, muahhahhahhhh!
Do not attempt to be supermum! It's way too hard. Put your feet up instead.
weesooty hope that your first few days at home without DH have been ok. have also been finding the tiredness difficult (and also just worrying that i am looking after DS as best as I can which is making things more emotional) so my sympathies. And definitely put your feet up and don't bother with the house work!
loopy hope you're managing ok and re-establishing milk supply...
so, thank god the stitches weren't infected but both me and DS do have thrush which is making feeds painful. The GP prescribed something which isn't actually for babies under 4 months but she said it was fine so I went ahead and gave it to him. And then totally freaked out when i read the leaflet to say the reason was a risk of choking on the sticky gel to smear inside his mouth . Even though we've been v careful and used a tiny amount, I have spent hours now watching DS and checking he's still breathing for about an hour after giving him this stuff.... All adding to the stress... I need to worry less.
First day without DP tomorrow as he goes back to work - hoping i'll manage ok.
Hope everyone else is ok and Happy Halloween!
3 hours sleep! It was when she woke at 5.30, went back to sleep at 7 and then woke up again at 7.30 that I really broke. Off to the lactation consultant this afternoon though, hopefully things will get easier soon.
oh pinpan good luck with the breastfeeding consultant.
Not had a great night here either... I have a feeling he'll sleep all day again...
I'm sitting on the sofa for the sleep deprived, care to join me?!!
Baby Loopy's favourite trick is to keep us awake for around 3 hours every night - between 3 & 6am or like last night 2 & 5am <yaaaaaawwwn>
Look forward to when he starts to distinguish between night & day - when does that happen???
Thanks for all the advice re: expressing etc. I'm really pleased to report that while i was doing 50ml a day at the weekend, I've just done 120ml from one boob alone. I may feel like Daisy the Dairy Cow but juicing the boob is really working
Good luck pinpan And yes, Baby Loopy goes from quiet to screaming in 5 seconds - trying soothers but he's not convinced
WeeSooty I also have a Velcro baby, it's lovely for cuddles but not so much for going to toilet, showering, eating, etc!!
Well done in 120ml Loopy! Impressive.
Do you think the secret is to just keep pumping or maybe to have a regular time to pump? I only ever get pitiful amounts but just tried the odd time here & there with aim to build up some kind of stash for if I'm away from her in future.
Last time BF consultant said to try pumping after a feed so body thinks needs to make more but hardly get anything then. Even if I'm full to bursting I gush out maybe 10-20ml then it goes to nothing.
A better pump?
Any top expressers have any tips?
Msinterpret I think perseverance & regular pumping is the key for me. I was so dejected when I only got a little bit but try to pump every 3/4 hours - even if I don't bother at night, I've definitely noticed an increase after a few days.
Also, for those who had c-sections, any tips on how to look after the wound in the long term? Mine's looking ok (so I'm told!) and not infected but just wondered if I can bathe in tea tree oil etc. At the moment it just get washed when I have my daily shower
I've expressed (along with breastfeeding some of the time) with DD1 and now DD2, and always managed quite well. I currently get about 110ml from each side, so that's enough for two bottle feeds. Takes me about 15-25 mins in total. I BF or express every 3-4 hours. I think sticking to similar times of day does help, as the body somehow knows when to refill, as it were.
I just have a Philips Avent manual pump and have had no problems with it. I'm almost tempted to invest in a fancy dual electric pump if I'm going to keep expressing long term, as expressing does take twice as long as BFing (not to mention washing and sterilising the pump and bottles).
I'd actually like to go back to just BFing; it's more convenient (although DH being able to feed her sometimes is a definite plus), but I feel like I've got into a routine now of expressing. Also I'm a bit shy about BFing in public or in front of relatives - silly I know, and maybe I'll get more comfortable eventually - but bottle feeding means I can go out and take a bottle with me.
In other news, my lovely parents have moved 400 miles to be nearer to us, and to help out with the DDs. They (finally! The house sale dragged on for ages) got their keys today. It's all very exciting, and I'm really looking forward to seeing more of them and having a bit of help. Not to mention babysitting. And sleepovers! DH's parents live abroad, so having relatives close by will make a huge difference.
Hope everyone else is well. Loved all the Halloween costumes on the FB page btw. Too cute!
Earnest I'm curious how you are fitting in BF and expressing I have considered doing the same. My DD on average (aside from cluster feeding times) feeds every 3-4 hours so how would I 'schedule' expressing? I have the same pump as you although I haven't yet used it.
I've BF infront of female relatives but I don't plan to in front of male relatives apart from DH of course.
Loopy not sure about tea tree oil and baths. I've just been showering and then using a hair dryer on cool setting to dry it off. A bath does sound appealing though! How are you finding your recovery? I feel ok but am trying not to overdo things - not being able to do housework is driving me insane though
Thunder I'm usually a super clean freak but since the arrival of Baby Loopy, I barely have time for housework anyway!
I'm actually managing very well & put it down to walking the hospital corridors with the baby for 2 hours on my second night in hospital when he wouldn't settle - since then I've been fine really. DH keeps telling me to rest, etc but I really do feel fine so hoping to get cleared for driving next week by the doctor. If not, I shall be enormously isolated when DH returns to work as live in a small village
Oh and whole area feels strangely numb too - slightly ironic that it would be the perfect time for a bikini wax!
How long ago was your c-section? Mine was 2 weeks; I reckon I'd be fine to drive now but MW wants me to wait until at least 3 weeks then go and see the dr; I too live in a rural village so a bit stuck without my car!
I know what you mean about the numbness...it's a bit odd! The only time I get any discomfort is when I go for a wee; I have to sort of hold on to the scar IYSWIM - MW said my uterus hasn't gone back in yet so hoping that will go when it has properly contracted! (Sorry - that's a bit TMI!)
Mine was 10 days ago - I get discomfort when I sneeze or cough!
cakes I've been alternating BFing and expressing roughly every 3-4 hours, and that equates to 2 bottle feeds to every breast feed (so I do breast, bottle, bottle, breast, bottle, bottle etc. and fit in the expressing when she's asleep). It doesn't always work out as she might be fast asleep when I'm due to BF so I'll express instead, rather than leave too long between 'emptying' iyswim. I always BF for the 3-4am feed though as it saves going all the way to the kitchen to warm a bottle
Velcro baby here too! Turned into a complete klingon about 5 days ago, so it's getting much harder to get stuff done.
He's still spitting up loads but has put on a fair whack of weight regardless so that's a bonus - but washing needs to be done every day for him as it all gets covered in milk <sigh>
Had my first big bath today - and saw that I have got stretch marks, right under the bulge of my bump. Just 4 - but I'd not seen them before (our shower room doesn't have a mirror, only the bathroom and I've mostly been wearing my support vest when I've been in there!) Hey ho. Could be worse!
I've got heaps of stretch marks thumb, they're turning a lovely shade of pale purple now.
cakes, the advice I've been given is to express after the first morning feed - your milk is most nutritious then, and you'll get the hindmilk which is the most calorific so good for smaller quantities filling them up. Also, doing it at the same time each day and having a routine is best, as your body will adjust to only produce the amounts that are regularly being taken. On the flip side that apparently means that if you always do a bottle feed at a certain time of day (say 11 pm) then once your boobs adjust, you won't have the breast milk at that time of day to do the job any more. I borrowed a Medela Swing from my midwife and it was great, so I think I'll get one of those at some point when I begin to think about going back to work (horrors - not for a little while!).
Lactation consultant confirmed that the womble has a tongue tie, also her top lip is a bit restricted and the top of her mouth is a funny shape because the tongue tie meant she wasn't shaping her mouth with her tongue in utero. Got a hospital appointment on Monday morning to find out if they can snip it there. There's only one person on the South Island that will do lasers and they are booked up to the end of January, so if scissors won't do the job, it'll be a trip to the North Island for us!
Oh pinpan I'm so that you're getting it seen to so quickly!! I still have to wait until 20th Nov to get DS2 seen (and hopefully snipped at the same time).
maybe I should fly to NZ to get seen quicker...
I honestly thought DS2 had drained me dry last night - he was cluster feeding so much, I couldn't believe there was anything left in there! But apparently there was enough for him. The human body is amazing, really!
It sucks that you have to wait so long thumb! It's such a relief that things are moving in days rather than weeks for me.
Definite 6 week growth spurt here - normally womble sleeps for 2-3 hours, 2-3 times during the day, but today she's had 3 half hour snoozes and spent the whole of the rest of the time eating or pooping. Just hoping it won't go on all night too.The evening feeding frenzy went to midnight last night... She's finally nodded off on my knee and I don't dare move in case she wants more milk - I'm pretty sore!
To those who had c-sections, I live in a small village too, I've been naughty I started driving without Dr saying I could but waited until nearly 4 weeks after but I'm making use of the bump belt that I used during pg so that I'm at least a little protected if I have to stop suddenly. I've only started getting the numb sensation in the last week or so. The odd sensation when you go to toilet does go I think it took almost 3 weeks for me.
Thanks for the expressing advice
Hi all. Been so long since I posted on here it's dropped off my threads! Hope all is well. I've also got a c section scar but was told no driving for 6 weeks?! I haven't put anything on it but I would imagine t tree oil would be ok, so long as its diluted??!!!!
Still having pain at the initial latching on when DD feeds. Apparently I should try putting more boob in her mouth- but they're massive!!
bigger than her head I'll try but it goes resolve, I wasnt sure if that pain is par of the course and will get better when my nipples toughen up?
My mum is still here as is my DH so house is tidy and I'm eating well. What will happen when they're not here? I'm dreading it!
Can I join the Velcro baby club too please?!
thumb i thought that DS had drained me dry last night too... It got to one point where i just was hoping for another 30mins to produce a bit more milk!! Am going to try expressing in the morning - though don't necessarily want to lower the milk supply at night.
pinpan hope they can snip it on the south island! a trip up north sounds quite a lot right now
Is anyone else finding the medical/MW/HV appts as bit much? Monday was MW, then the HV turned up unnannounced then a docs appt. Yesterday jaundice check which came back slightly elevated but nothing to worry about so we have to go back and be tested again next thurs. So we haven't been discharged from the care of the MWs yet, so monday another MW appt and then HV on Weds, jaundice again on thurs. And today a hearing check - which was inconclusive for the right ear so yet another appt next friday... it's never ending. I know it's all for his own good though.
The hearing i am a bit worried about though - there might be a slight loss in the right ear . It is only slight but still... need to wait to have more tests before we know the full picture.
Just catching up as baby was born late Sunday night, 7 days overdue but healthy. Didn't go entirely to plan as a water birth at home as the entonox ran out and I had about an hour (somepoint between 6 and 8cm dilated) without any pain relief so as soon as the next lot turned up I went straight for the diamorphine and a 'dry' delivery.
Don't know how you're all managing with so many more sleepless nights under your belts!! And feel for those of you whose DH's have gone back to work already. Mum and I are starting to plan how she'll help when DH goes back as he works away and will be gone for six weeks straight.
I wondered if any of you have discontinued with bfing? Or have found a thread about it? I really struggled as I can see you all have, but made the decision to start formula feeding on Wednesday .
I am struggling with the decision though so hoped there might be some others in the same boat... tbh I've dreaded trying to feed throughout the pregnancy as I can't even bear the feeling of bedlinen, or a strong shower on my bare boobs - let alone a LO sucking on them. I'm not sure it helped that he didn't breathe on his own as quickly as the MW's would've wanted so he was taken straight to hospital for observation and I didn't see him again until 2hrs old. I was also terrified of being in more pain after the awful hour labouring without pain relief.
Now my milks coming through and it's making me feel full of guilt and regret that something so good for him is there and I'm not giving it to him - I might ask the MW if its possible to try and express and give him both breastmilk and formula...
Sorry this has been a one-sided post but no-one else I can speak to can quite understand the emotional side of this choice.
Pheebs firstly massive, massive <hugs>
Secondly, you're so right, it is an emotional choice & so hard to find objective, unbiased advice on the subject. I can only share my own experience:-
Baby Loopy was born 10 days ago and my milk didnt come in til day 4. On day 3, the first morning home, he hadn't fed for over 13 hours & so I gave him formula as he was slightly jaundiced & likely dehydrated. I then continued to try & BF but wasn't working well so topped up with formula. Anyway, I then got lazy & didn't bother to try & BF for a few days. I then realised my milk was drying up & hated the fact that I had chosen formula cos it was the "easy" option.
So I've started expressing & got to a point where the boob juice is making a return & feeding Baby Loopy expressed breastmilk in the day & formula (as not producing quite enough for 24 hours) at night. This way Baby Loopy gets goodness of breastmilk at least half the time.
It's not an ideal situation & I would like to return to breast feeding properly but need to get my supply up to a normal amount first.
They often talk about 'nipple confusion' when discussing bottle & breastfed babies but I think it's a huge generalisation. I've heard of plenty of friends & family who mix bottle & breast and one of my MWs even suggested nipple shields - which resemble bottle teats anyway!
Hope the above helps in some way. I'm mixing both types & Baby Loopy is still weeing/pooping til his hearts content & hasn't had an upset tummy or anything so if he's happy & fed, then I'm a happy Mummy
goodsense, good luck with the hearing test. The womble failed hers in one ear at the 48 hour check but she was fine after 2 weeks - they said quite often there is still fluid hanging around for quite a while which messes things up. Will keep my fingers crossed for you.
Pheebs, more hugs for you. The main thing is to not beat yourself up about it, whatever you do. A happy and peaceful mummy makes for a happy baby (well, that's what they say! Some babies
mentioning no names WOMBLE are just fuss beasts-- might differ). You could try expressing and bottle feeding breast milk as well as formula if it makes you feel better - might be worth a try just to see if it works out for you, and then at least you'll feel that you've given it a good shot if it doesn't. I know a few people here who have been doing that because of nipple troubles/milk supply issues etc. and like Loopy, they seem to have cheerful babes and are mostly either heading back towards full BF or are content with the middle ground.
A friend of a friend wrote this blog mostly about her baby struggles - evelyndoyle.com/ - might be interesting for some of you. I haven't read it all, just dipped in and out, but it's good to read someone being so honest about how hard she has found mothering. It's so easy to tell yourself that everyone else is finding it sweet and it's only you that is doing it 'wrong' somehow. That's why I like this forum so much. Lots of fellow complainers!
Congrats on the birth Pheebs, and hugs from me too.
I'm another who's had problems with BFing, despite having done it all once before. With DD1 I mixed expressed breast milk and formula from a few weeks old (like Loopy I was struggling to express enough for all her feeds). Moved on to formula exclusively at about 5mo. I know one anecdote alone doesn't make for convincing evidence but she's now a bright, healthy 2y7mo. And I shed lots of tears over the move to bottle-feeding and then again over giving formula, but now, a couple of years down the line, it seems like much less of a big deal. It is such an emotional thing though; even expressing and bottle feeding DD2 upset me at first, despite knowing that it worked out fine with DD1.
If you do decide to try BFing, I'd recommend getting some help with getting your little one latched on well from the start, to avoid any pain in the long run. Best of luck with whatever you decide to do though
OMG Loopy/Pinpan/Earnest thank you so much! I'm so pleased that I haven't lost the possibility of giving him some of the goodness from breastmilk
My community mw is really lovely (I was gutted she was off when I went into labour) and visiting tomorrow so I'll ask her to help me have a go at expressing this proper milk as opposed to the colostrum which I found so difficult.
I don't actually know anyone who has successfully BF'd so they all comfort me that its ok not to BF and are perhaps, like me, unaware that I could still give it a go.
<little pom-pom waves due to sore boob-age> Yay for mnetters excellent advice!!
Glad you're feeling more positive Pheebs That's one of the things I love about MN; no matter what you're going through, there's usually someone who's been through the same.
Re-reading my post, it's not clear but when I say mixing formula and breastmilk I actually mean giving some bottles of formula and some of breastmilk. I'm not sure you can mix them in the same bottle. Possibly unimportant but I don't want to confuse anyone!
I also really struggled with BF to start with; even now my right side can get so sore that I dread having to feed from it sometimes. I started expressing on about day 6 and giving a bottle (alternating between left side and bottles). MW said expressing was also a good way of increasing my supply (which was a bit off because of c-section).
Expressing works really well for me (have an electric tommee tippee pump) and baby goes between bottles and boob with no issues at all.
Maybe give expressing a try and see how you get on, but definitely don't feel like you have failed in anyway if it doesn't work well for you; you're well being is much more important.
I think before little one came along I was probably a bit quick to judge formula feeders; no chance now! Anything to help get through these early stages is welcome in this house
I also agree that you can mix-feed, Pheebs - expressing is a good way to go if you have tactile issues with baby feeding directly from you. I have an Avent manual breast pump - it works quite well (I have difficulty expressing and it still managed to get some out of me! ) but in the end what matters most is that your baby is getting enough food, regardless of source.
Well I have more bad(dish) news - DS2 has the same hernia that DS1 had - where the tube that allows the testis to drop from the abdomen into the ball sac hasn't closed off properly at the top, so the bowel now goes down into the groin area. This needs to be operated on to seal off the tube, just in case - because at the moment I can push it back but if it gets trapped, it could get infected/necrotic. With DS1, he had an op under GA at 7wo - I assume the same will happen here as well - hopefully they'll move a darn sight faster than they did with the tonguetie. <sigh>
I usually lurk but had to post to express my at Thunder's comment that she used to judge people for formula feeding.
There are lots of compelling reasons why some people can't breastfeed. I EBF my DS1 until I returned to work when he was 12 months old and hope to do the same this time but one of my NCT group had PND and had to take drugs which weren't compatible with breastfeeding and another got recurrent mastitis and a breast abscess which meant she had to give up. These women suffered enormous guilt and would have been extremely upset to think that strangers were judging them for their decision to formula feed.
Of course, there are people who choose not to breastfeed for social reasons that
smug mumsnetters some people consider unacceptable e.g. some young single mums who feel embarrassed about getting their boobs out in public or women who choose to return to work when their babies are still young or people who simply find it too exhausting and stressful to be dealing with cracked and bleeding nipples and poor latch and all that malarkey after a difficult and slow recovery from childbirth. Whatever those reasons, they are bound to be compelling to them and their particular socio-economic or family circumstances and it is not our place to judge.
Sorry to vent but this kind of breastfeeding snobbery brings out the very worst in me .
heavenly I think in thunder's defence, she is agreeing with you. I read her post and it sounded very supportive of FF and shows how she has changed since having her baby. I think all of the posts are supporting the decision to FF and we all appreciate its a hard decision to come to. BF isn't for everyone and as long as baby is healthy that's the main thing. I find this group, and MN as a whole, supportive in general and haven't really seen anyone being harsh about the decision to FF.
Heavenly I've started replying to your comment a number of times, but actually I really don't think I need to justify my post any further. You have either not read it properly, or have overreacted to it. If anyone else who contributes to this thread - which I have now been part of for over 9 months - wants me to clarify what I mean, i am happy to do so. I'm sure they, who 'know' me, will understand my comments were purely supportive.
Please feel free to de-lurk and contribute to this thread yourself, but don't do so just to start a bf v ff argument unnecessarily.
We got you, Thunder, don't worry.
<changing the subject >
Anyone else have to eat breakfast at 4 am regularly, after the middle of the night feed? Starving!
Sorry to hear about the operation thumb - sounds like you're having a bad run of it.
Got 4 hours out of womble tonight, not as good as yesterday's six but still not bad, and it was relatively straightforward as well
apart from that mad wailing bit when I insisted on burping her and she just wanted more milk. Today will be haggard - lactation consultant at the hospital, followed by six week check and first vaccinations. Expecting a grumpy womble soon!
Thumb I hope all your DS's surgery needs are sorted soon. I am sure you were hoping not to go through the same things all over again. However at least you know what you are dealing with (I keep telling myself this with pip's reflux).
Pinpan I plan my night time snack before I go to bed so it is ready and waiting for me. Pip is not yet feeding at the same time each night so I will be stuffing my face somewhere between 3 and 5 am. I saw my aunt yesterday and she asked if I needed to eat more while bf pip. My response was that I eat 3 good meals a day, plus a snickers bar, banana, sandwich and handful of biscuits.
Thunder I understand what you meant and bf and formula. Far stronger sentiments are often expressed on MN without challenge.
Me too pinpan!
I really didn't think enough about the shopping this week - could've done with buying some of those cereal bar thingies for exactly that purpose. Did think to get some of those readymade sandwich fillers which have helped during the day. I was surprised when the HV at our ante-natal classes said that most mums she sees skip meals - I am a monster when I get hungry, grouchy and faint etc so couldn't imagine skipping food, until the MW visit yesterday when I realised I'd been up for two hours and not had breakfast and would be eating through my checkup!
So I did have a go at the manual pump and was surprised that I got some of the 'fore' milk out - not much, but more than I'd expected and the relief on my boobs was a real bonus so I'll keep trying a bit more each day and try to get out of this mindset that anything breast related is going to be painful.
So sorry that you've had such bad news Thumb, but as you say hopefully they'll move quickly and get LO sorted soon <hugs and best wishes in the meantime>
Pheebs, one of the things I discovered through pumping is that the milk appears to be released from the ducts in some kind of order - so you need to keep going for a while to release it from all ducts, or you get one part of your breast that just never releases (or that could just be me, of course!) - I also found I had to turn the pump cup around a little bit to put pressure on different parts of my breast to ensure it kept going. HTH
Sorry to go bk to the BF topic once again but i wanted to add smth which i hope may be helpful to some of you. I started BF within 12 hrs if my emergency CS, which was amazing. The first 2 weeks were great and then i started to get sore cracked nipples. It all became so painful that i was screaming at the beginning and during most feeds and the idea of feeding the little one gave me the chills. Amongst many things, i decided to try the nipple caps!!!! What a little miracle they are! I feel like i have been born again! So pls any of you struggling with BF cause of cracked and sore nipples, give those caps a try. By the way, Boots own brand worked for me ))
Tongue tie snipped! Womble was very brave (actually she was crying already because she wanted milk) though she did choose today to shed her very first tears. Poor thing! She was tough as for her vaccinations this afternoon though. Feeding feels more comfortable already though they say it will take a couple of days for her to fully appreciate and use her extra tongue movement.
Hi girls. I am still here just so tired and before I know it whole days have passed and I'm still knackered.
I am thinking of you all and will check back soon.
Hurrah Pinpan! Am v. Have been given the suggestion that a dentist might do the job for me so will look into that. Looks like I'm going to have the same time problem with the hernia as with the tonguetie, for the same reasons - but at least if anything escalates with the hernia I will just go straight to A&E.
I didn't get on so well with the nipple shields, I have to say - although it reduced the initial pain the continuing levels of pain were higher for me with the shield than without it.
Huzzah for the tongue tie pinpan! FX things cintinue to improve. Thumb, i hope it wont be long until your LO finds relief.
Ok I have a question. Am going to express using a manual pump as my boobs are sooo painful and engorged. I've got a pump and have sterilised it in solution but how do I dry it? If I air dry it it won't be sterile but if I leave it wet it won't be very nice. Or am I over thinking it? Also, will expressing interfere (ie increase) my supply?
I leave the pump wet. A bit of water around the bit that goes on your boob helps create a seal, needed to get pumping started. Pumping should increase your supply, provided that it is in addition to all feeds you are currently doing. If you regularly replace a bf with a bottle you might start reducing your supply at that time.
Pip needs Gaviscon at least 4 times each day. I have found it is easier to give it to her in 20 to 30ml of milk in a bottle. So I have to express at least 100ml every day and have the bottle ready at the same time as a bf. It is a pain to do but seems to help a bit.
Pip has been asleep for 3.5 hours now. I have had a shower, lunch, spent too long on MN. Really nice. Why won't she do this at night?
Alas, the womble chose the fussy rather than the sleepy vaccination reaction, so the night was long and the feeds were frantic and chompy. I'm so tired! Hoping she gets back to her normal self soon and lets me actually latch her on properly and stays there for more than a minute.
thumb, there are clinics (mostly dentists) that do lasers here for tongue tie and you can just make an appointment and go along. Apparently the hospital scissors are much easier to recover from though as there isn't any 'burn' tissue to look after.
elvis I also leave the pump/bottle wet; works fine and doesn't bother the baby.
DH is going back to work tomorrow - in a way I'm quite looking forward to it. He seems to create so much mess in the house, and I really can't afford for him to do the food shopping anymore! Plus I think I will end up resting and napping more when he's not here as there isn't anything else to do and I still can't drive.
Thimb sorry to hear about the problems you are having; all sounds like a complete nightmare. Hope you can get it sorted soon
Sorry peeps, no time to name check this time but just a quick ARGH!
I'm massively crapping myself at the thought of being alone with the baby next week when DH goes back to work. In all seriousness, how do you go to the loo or shower when you have a baby? Where can you safely leave them? Or do you leave the thought of doing anything until they're asleep? And if they are being a Velcro baby, how the hell do you get anything done???
I feel so stupid asking all these questions, for the millionth time, I'm asking why the frig isn't there a manual ???
How's everyone else managed? Oh and Baby Loopy apparently doesn't like rocking, white noise or dummies - I thought these were universal in creating happy babies
As i've discovered sometimes you just need to leave them in their bed and do what you need to do, if they cry that is unfortunate. Also you don't have to be superwoman and achieve everything at once. As the days of not having DH around go by you somehow manage to do more I found.
I do everything when the womble is asleep, though I try to also go to sleep myself as much as possible. I don't get very much done. The laundry is first priority, followed by feeding myself. Everything else is gravy (though I had to do some tidying today or I was going to go crazy). If you have to put the baby down and go to the loo, then do it - it won't hurt them if they fuss or cry for a few minutes. Just strap them into a rocker or put them in the pram/cot. I have been known to take the rocker to the bathroom with me - it drives like a racing car on the carpet and the womble quite likes the high speed ride down the hallway! Velcro babies might like front packs, then they can come everywhere with you. Today we learned that the womble HATES the front pack and the moby wrap.
Loopy, your questions are not stupid. It can feel like a massive achievement to simply do any of the every day activities that you used to do pre-DC. Bet you never thought that going to the toilet would require a plan.
I often put Pip in her car seat when I need to put her down. I cannot lie her flat on the floor because she will be sick. So the car seat comes to the bathroom while I have a shower. If your DC is ok lying down then a warm towel on the bathroom floor allows you to shower, use toilet etc.
Pinpan, hope womble is ok after her vaccination. DD1 had a really fussy 48 hours after her first jabs. I think I should have given her more paracetamol. Not looking forward to pip's jabs.
Thanks Running. She's been pretty fussy when awake today but (thankfully) got some good sleeps in. Rather clingy though so I didn't get to put her down and sleep myself much, as she woke up every time I tried to persuade her the pram was the best place to be. Can't see the jab sites anymore and she doesn't seem to be any pain - gave her paracetamol a couple of times last night and it worked wonders.
Just got to survive 2 more weeks and then my parents are here for a month (not staying with us but just down the road which will be great), DH will be home over Christmas, then DH's mum is here for January. Loneliness be gone! Company with cups of tea! Can't wait.
And surely by the end of January I will have got the hang of things.
Loopy I totally understand you crapping yourself!! We haven't got a date for DH to go back yet, but it'll be in the next two weeks and I have sudden panic moments about becoming a single mum for six or more weeks! Do you have friends/family who can pop in for an hour? I'm also planning on getting plenty of ready-meals in, I know its not the healthiest option but it will be a little less stressful (and lets face it - LO will wake up the minute I sit down to eat so any home-cooking will end up zapped in the microwave anyway lol)
I was also a bit reassured at how calm the MW was with the baby crying, and I think there must be an element of braving a noisy few minutes so that we can get the vitals done...
Does everyone still swear by the ewan/prince noise-thingies? Am considering having it as a backup - LO is taking longer and longer to settle at night, and actually has dark circles round his eyes this morning.
I also wanted to ask about winding - we're getting him burping during/after meals, and he's only bringing milk up occasionally BUT after feeding he does cough and go red in the face and make a sort of raspy noise when breathing out like he's really uncomfortable - could this be that he still has wind trapped or something I should speak to the MW about?
I just have no idea what might be normal at 10do
Thanks girls, good tips!
Pheebs Baby Loopy often sounds raspy after a feed. Because of their palate/mouths (the MW explained it way better than I can!!), they can often get milk up their noses, particularly after a vigorous feed - could this be it?
Hi all - i haven't posted in such a long time as I never seem to have a moment with LO and a toddler but I do read all the time and you all keep me going during the night feeds.
Things are well here Chez Tea. DS was 5 weeks old yesterday and is still on the 91st centile at 12 lbs 1. We feed on demand so he can go 1-3 hours between feeds with the occasional 4 hour gap. i have teeny boobies so this amazes me and I frequently squirt milk everywhere - I think I'm going to have to incinerate the sofa when we're done! I'm exhausted like all of you but it seems to be easier second time round as my expectations are much lower! We got a cleaner so I don't worry about housework and I don't try to leave the house very much, I get friends to come to me. First time round, it felt like I was always rushing to some class or music group and it was hectic, def taking things at a slower pace this time.
My parents were here for a week (from Ireland) which was wonderful then MIL came to stay and now it's just me and the kiddies. Sometimes it's overwhelming / exhausting / frustrating but I just try to take it one day at a time. We gave DS a dummy last night as he was so upset and overtired and he was asleep within minutes. I'm not sure how I feel about it as DD didn't have a dummy but I was desperate for sleep and no amount of rocking, cuddling, boob would calm him down.
Not looking forward to jabs in a few weeks but a necessary evil. DS also needs the BCG as DH is from S Africa so an extra one for him
all round and will try to post a bit more on the thread x
Loopy that could explain the raspy breathing - he goes at the bottle like thing possessed at night, but not in the day when he rasps less or not at all.
I am wondering if its actually constipation - I've left a message for the MW to ask. Only its as if he's straining but nothings happening, and DH said last nights poo was small and nugget-like and tbh the one I cleaned up in the early hours yesterday was very dry and grainy even though there was a normal amount of it...
So its totally true what they say about becoming a mum and obsessing over baby poo!!
How long do you all have to be awake for night feeds? Womble just would not go down tonight so it's a 5 am breakfast for me, and 2 hours since I got up at 3 to feed her. Zzzzz.
Have fun with all the baby poo. We had green poo this evening!
Was it because I had curry for dinner?
pinpan we regularly are awake between 2-5 or 3-6. Either Baby Loopy won't settle/is fussing or just awake & doesn't want to sleep
Pheebs I don't have a Ewan sheep & not sure white noise works on my LO. I am, however, investing in a Winnie the Pooh lightshow thingy in an effort to introduce some routine/bedtime cues to the baby.
Ho ho ho, I just ordered Ewan the Sheep. Will let you know if it works!
Now to wake the beast and wrangle her into her car seat... Take bets on whether she will demand some milk first?
Loopy, the womble had a few nights of long wakeness at the beginning. It's a blur already but I think she started actually sleeping at night properly around 4 weeks old, although it does just take a long time to feed her sometimes. Good luck!
Like MakeTea am reading but not always posting, thiugh dd1 back at nursery this week after half term so bit easier! managed to go into town to meet dh for lunch and do some shopping!
loopy & others - I found that last time I'd get mopey about not havig 'done' much all day but I found writing down a quick list (or even mentally) before I went to sleep helped so I didn't discount all the little things I'd achieved - e.g. number one: looked after and kept alive a teeny monster all day! But also - unloaded dishwasher; hung out washing, had a shower etc - those things are achievements with a teeny baby, esp first time round when it's all new.
A good friend of mie with 2 gave me the advice to sort myself out of a morning THEN deal with baby (within reason!). I find grabbing that shower or dressing properly makes me feel sooo much better and other things more achievable. Even velcro babies should survive a few mins away from you if they're at least clean and fed. sometimes it even helps - they need a bit less stimulation or just to stare at a mobile for a few minutes!
Pheebs - it sounds a bit like constipation, or not enough fluid anyway but ask your MW.
My velcro baby has become ridiculously klingon - I've spent a fair bit of time with him koala-ing onto my belly today, just to keep him asleep as he didn't sleep nearly enough last night and every time I put him down, he wakes after 5 minutes. It's worked - he's had a decent sleep and is less fretful.
Unfortunately I can't leave him to cry to long because of the sodding hernia - the more he cries, the more pressure is put on it and the risk of strangulation increases that little bit - this is a bit of a 'mare and exactly what I had with DS1 as well. <sigh> He's also developed the crying until he can't breathe thing that DS1 did too - yay!
Maketea - I was also contemplating a dummy for Wriggler because he cluster feeds until I can't believe I actually have any milk left - but haven't bought one yet (hoping the tonguetie snip etc. will make it unnecessary for me).
Lots of highpitched screaming going on here too - not sure if it's pain or frustration or what - but so long as it doesn't last long I'm trying to be relaxed about it.
Wriggler has been very snorty and had a few milky bogeys as well, and milk coming down his nose - I think it is the ferocious feeding, or possibly the reflux, but it doesn't seem to be a problem. Except when he inhales milk while he's feeding - but he coughs that out again so hopefully not a big problem. Gah!
I'm quite glad he's a second baby, not a first - I'd probably be in bits if he was my first!
Tonight I am on my own with Wriggler - DH has a conference and is away overnight, so MIL has taken DS1 for a sleepover - it feels a bit odd, tbh!
Thumb, the womble does the scream until there is no breath left in her body thing too- it's horrible!
Hi all, how are we doing?
Went to the doctor today who said I should be able to drive from next week (yay!) but still to be careful with heavy lifting so DH will be 'working from home' next week so he can lift wet washing, baby in car seat etc. Feel but also feel like I'm really putting off the inevitable of being by myself. I don't know why I have such a lack of confidence in spending the day by myself & getting out & about ?!?
And for those who have boy babies, do you find you're doing a million (well, it feels like that many!!) sleepsuit changes because of wees up the back?!! Baby Loopy loves his playmat but every time he wees, it goes up his back which means loads of sleepsuit changes every day!! Is this a 'boy' thing? Or is it the crappy Pampers nappies? We make the nappy as tight as we can without hurting his tum but all this washing is doing my head in!! Any thoughts? I've heard you should try to point their winkies downward (easier said than done, it seems very springy ) and perhaps I need to buy a smaller nappy (they are size 1 Pampers & he's 6lb, 10oz) but I'm guessing that's all my options?
SNAP! Loopy I've changed LO's clothes 3 times today, but also using pampers so I couldn't say if its a boy thing or the nappies either I also make sure I have the clean nappy open next to him before I start changing him so I can get it over the spray as quick as possible! It's gone halfway across the room and narrowly missed a pile of clean clothes
So, he is constipated and I've been getting so upset seeing his beautiful little face all red and twisted that I think I've started to make DH worry - I don't know how any of you with more serious baby problems get through the day... parenthood is such a test of all you are that if I can do this I can
take over the world do anything lol
And I totally agree with MsInterpret's mate - I've tried going back to bed after the morning feed instead of getting up and doing a few chores and I never caught up and felt the worst for it. I'm also thinking I ought to try things like showering while DH is still asleep so I can feel more confident about doing it alone when he's gone. At least that way I can shout him awake from the shower if need be.
And some Dad wisdom from DH:
Him: 'He's smiling at me again!'
Me: 'It's actually wind I'm afraid'
Him: 'Yeah (in exasperated tone) cos farts are funny'
Pheebs at your DH!! I have to say my DH & I giggle like school kids when Baby Loopy blows off!!
Loopy I saw the dr as well today and have been declared fit to drive . So pleased; there is no way I could have waited another three weeks.
I too was dreading DH going back this week; but we've survived so far. Mostly I struggle with the loneliness; it was much more fun with DH about.
No problem with leaking wees here, and I also have a boy and use pampers. Maybe try going up a size; our nappies all started leaking until I changed to size 2 (though our chap was 8lb3 at birth and now a lot bigger!).
Loopy, my DH worked at home in the womble's third week and it was really good having back up. Don't worry though, you'll manage just fine. Just leave lots of bottles of water and biscuits within reach of anywhere you might sit down to feed so you don't get stuck in a chair hungry and thirsty!
I just ran out of chocolate fingers oh no!
We're on the 4th outfit of the day from milk spills and poosplosions, and always do laundry every day. Ran out of EVERYTHING yesterday, literally, good thing we have a tumble dryer. Might need to buy some more clothes.
I have to admit I don't have a problem with wees going up the back of the nappy/sleepsuit, far more problem with milk regurge on everything!
We do get wet sleepsuits but only when Wriggler is in cloth nappies, or from sweating (bloody weather here is all over the shop at the moment, temperature-wise!)
Got a cancellation to see the cranial osteopath with Wriggler today - he's already a whole heap more relaxed, sleeping better again and less of the high-pitched wailing so hurrah! Will probably need a couple more sessions to see him right, next one is after seeing the consultant, so that will be interesting as well.
Ooh I lost you all as its been so long since I posted! Went to see cranial osteopath yesterday for DD and they think they can help with her latch. Still getting pain and now have cracked nipple. Also saw a BFing counsellor who said no tongue tie but not enough of my boob is getting in her mouth
I'm not surprised as my boob is bigger than her face!
Am not sure if osteopath will help but I think it's worth a try. Following that she has just slept for five hours so FX! How did u get on thumb?
Whilst most of the time all is good, the pain at feeding time is difficult and I find myself in tears sometimes because of it. I am really determined not to give up and people say this will pass so hopefully it's not going to be much longer....
Always worth a try, Elvis! Wriggler is being annoying with his latch - it's just so much worse now, and he rolls my nipple between his gums which is so painful! I have a bruise now (but no crackedness any more, thank goodness). For some reason he is loath to open his mouth properly to start with so I'm actually having to sometimes stick a finger in his mouth to try and make him drop his jaw so I can get the nipple in far enough (point it towards the roof of the mouth, that helps a bit). Other times he just goes straight in, barracuda-style, and gets on with it. But soon starts clicking and rolling <sigh>
Only another 11 days to go til we see the consultant for tonguetie and hernia!
Tomorrow Wriggler is 1 whole month old and is already starting to be a little too big for some of his newborn stuff - waaaahh!! And since he is definitely my last baby, I will actually have to dispose of the outgrown stuff this time - waaaahhhhh!! I'm such a sentimental tit, honestly.
Does anyone else's LO click there tongue against the nipple? Since she has been able to semi stick her tongue out she has done it. BF counsellor said its to do with tongue position when she latches but I can't quite fathom out how to stop her doing it.
Hope everyone else is getting on ok or heading in the right direction
I dropped off the thread it's been so long since i posted too! been reading but no time to post with visitors and MIL here. She's been great though - i've only spent 2 days home alone with ds so far. And mum is arriving on Monday for 4 days.
loopy i hear you on being apprehensive about spending the entire week on my own. a few ladies from my NCT class are also ready to meet up so i think that'll be a good chance to
have a moan exchange info and experiences in RL. have you any local friends you could arrange to meet, even if just for a cuppa at your house?
I've also been changing LO's clothes a LOT but with Swiss grandma here this week, her expertise led to one day with NO changes... but it also required breaking contemporary rules like no side sleeping which seemed to stop the reflux as soon as she put him in the cot. not sure I'll do that when i'm on my own though...
Re, leaky nappies up the back - i tried pointing his winkie down and it does work well - that's cut down on changes. We stopped using pampers size 1 (ds was 7lb1, now a hefty 7lb13 in 3 wks, he's eating me alive) as they seemed so enormous in comparison to huggies newborn. but really, both leaked, huggies only slightly less so.
Hope you are all well and coping with the lack of sleep - 3-4 hours at the moment here... will post more an name check when i can.
ps - and at the hearing test today we got the all clear after being told there was a high likelihood of hearing loss last week. yay
Yay for helpful grandmas and happy hearing tests, goodsense!
I am absolutely EXHAUSTED - probably famous last words, but hey-ho. For some reason I didn't get to sleep in between night feeds Thursday, but think I've caught up a little. Turns out DH is an absolute mare if he doesn't get 6hrs so I'm resolute to do two night feeds in a row whether I like it or not because I need my nice husband back!
Actually did a shop yesterday too - LO's first trip out was to Tesco's, not sure what that says about me as his first outdoor experience probably should have been the park or somewhere similarly nice
The constipation is gone but he's still seeming very uncomfortable in the evenings so I'm thinking I'll get mum round so she can hear/see what he's like and tell me
how normal it is what she thinks..
Congrats on the hearing test goodsense thats great news x
Mum reckons we were sleeping through at 3 weeks which is the coming week for DS so fingers crossed lol
Good luck with the sleeping through, Pheebs! I was told the other day by a nurse that 5 hours in a row is considered 'sleeping through,' which seems insane. We got 5 hours last night, from half midnight til half five, though it followed 4 hours of weeping and wailing with a bunged up nose so it wasn't that refreshing for anyone else but the womble...
Feeling absolutely shattered & . All those feeling because of the massive change in your life, I feel it too. And babies that won't settle or sleep? Yep, got one of those too. Baby Loopy hasn't slept properly since this morning, it can't be healthy for a 3 week old?! He's so unsettled & crying, its been unrelenting today. I'm feeling stressed out & teary & also worried about my DH. I've never known him to lose his temper in 7.5 years I've known him but Baby Loopy is really trying his patience & obviously I don't think he'll harm the baby, but I'm worried he regrets having him. I've been holding off posting for a few days as I've not wanted to admit how crap I've been feeling, feel like such a shite mum already.
Thought my baby blues were over & done with but have been feeling very emotional today
Also here's a daft question for you - bathing baby, if you're feeding on demand, what time do you bath your baby? And if your baby wakes up starving obviously you shouldn't bathe then but if your baby falls asleep after the feed, when are you supposed to be able get them bathed?!
Hugs! I'm sure everyone has already told you that it gets better, but it really does. The womble did a lot of crying and not enough sleeping at the beginning, and both DH and I lost the plot multiple times. That's okay and totally understandable - it's fortunate if you can take it in turns so there is someone left 'holding the baby' but if you both can't cope at once, there's nothing wrong with plonking baby loopy in his cot/crib, shutting the door and going to have a cup of tea. He's safe, you get a few minutes to take a breath, and then you start again. Sleep deprivation is properly a torture method - my DH got pretty frustrated in the first weeks too, but when he managed to get a few nights of 6 hours sleep straight in, because I was able to manage the night feed/wail on my own, it made a massive difference. Does your DH sleep through the wails at night? Drives me mad sometimes that mine doesn't even stir, but it's a blessing really!
Womble is 7 weeks today and it's only in the last week that I've had days when I haven't cried my heart out at some point. It is such a big change, losing your freedom and your control over your own body, and remember that when baby loopy wails it is hormonal, emotional slavery that you are going through. Not easy to accept - it helped me a lot when I just 'gave in' and agreed with myself to just care for the womble as best I could, and look forward to being me again later on when she has grown up some. When baby loopy starts smiling back at you and DH it will help A LOT (especially if he has excellent timing like the womble, and turns it on just after sicking/weeing/pooping on you for the third time). My two coping mechanisms at the moment are lots of jiggling, and to shove a boob in the womble's mouth - she won't take it if she's REALLY not hungry, but otherwise it shuts her up good and proper. For a few minutes anyway...
You're absolutely not a shite mum, you're a great mum. It's just really, really, really hard looking after a new baby.
We bath in the evening, nearly every day - womble wakes up and eats, and eats, and at some point there's usually a brief period of calm during which we chuck her in the bath, and then she eats again and then goes to sleep.
Hey loopy just agreeing with what pinpan said. This is a really, really hard time. My LO is three weeks old too and seems to spend her time screaming or eating. It's normal to find it difficult and normal to cry or get upset. Nothing really prepares you for the massive change in your life and I think that's what I've struggled with.
It's such an emotional time and feelings are all over the place. Your DH may well think that, but I think that's ok too. I'm firmly believing it'll get better.
As for the bath, we tend to do it in a middle of a feed when she's fallen asleep and we want her to wake up
Loopy Pinpan is right. Having DD1 was a massive shock to DH and I. It is not something you can really prepare for. I had to take it one day at a time, thinking if I got through yesterday then I can get through tomorrow. I also agree with shoving a boob in as the first way to deal with crying. Yesterday pip was really grumpy and uncomfortable. DH took DD1 out for much of the day and I spent it either feeding pip or with her asleep on me. Any time I tried to put her down and do something she cried, so I gave up.
It really does get better. I think the first 2 to 3 months are the worst. But even within this period there is a gradual improvement. The crying (DC's and yours) will reduce. You will get more sleep and your DH's mood will improve. My DH is also bloody awful if he doesn't get enough sleep. He would deny this but the difference in his ability to tolerate both DDs (crying from one and tantrums from the other) is huge.
Please be kind to yourself and take each day one at a time. You might need to lower your expectations of what a good day looks like. Pip is 5 weeks now. To me a good day is one where we all get fed and dressed and DD1 got to school on time. Anything else achieved each day is a bonus.
Hey Loopy I feel very similar to you - I wonder why I ever agreed to have a baby because I seem to feel the responsibility for caring for this little creature so much more deeply... its not true but thats what sleep deprived and hormonal does for me!
I narrowly avoided a massive row with DH yesterday because he couldn't remember his outburst toward LO, he had been so tired the previous night he had no recollection of being angry and swearing at the poor child.
I cry most evenings, mostly through tiredness, but also because I get a cold shiver down my spine when baby wakes up - I dread that he might not want to go to sleep again. I'm also really struggling with having DH going back to work hanging over me, its so much harder when LO's unsettled/crying/not sleeping because I'm conscious that there's a countdown to dealing with it all on my own.
Everyday I wonder if it'll be the day I ring Mum to say I just can't cope anymore, but then I ask myself 'do I want someone else to raise him, cuddle him, see him smile?' and somehow it helps to remind me that I do want this, however hard it feels.
And thanks for posting, I've been wanting to say these things to someone
Everyday I wonder if it'll be the day I ring Mum to say I just can't cope anymore, but then I ask myself 'do I want someone else to raise him, cuddle him, see him smile?' and somehow it helps to remind me that I do want this, however hard it feels.
Pheebs this really, really struck a chord with me & by god you're so right. I really need to remember these words when I'm feeling a bit desperate.
Thanks also to Running/pinpan/elvis for your experiences & wise words It feels therapeutic to get these things off my chest & know that I'm not alone
Just to add to my essay... Pheebs, I felt the same about waking up - every time the womble got to sleep it was a little victory but at the same time the relentlessness of knowing she'd just wake up again was tough. Heh, I'm writing this on my phone in the dark at 5 am while rocking her snuffly self into oblivion - but we've had 5 hours in a go, two nights in a row... So keep saying one day at a time, and you only have to do each night once - the next one may be much better. They grow up so fast! Sob weep howl etc.
O loopy and pheebs I read both your posts with tears in my eyes. I've been avoiding posting as well as I feel so sh*t at being a mum!
I'm struggling so much this weekend as DH is nightshift and everything feels so much harder at night! I miss sleep so much, I know I am bad tempered with no sleep and I have nearly lost it a few times and ended up crying with guilt at being angry! DH is far better with no sleep but he has been struggling as well, feeling like he is not good enough to be a dad as he finds it hard. Despite him being utterly amazing!
Have read everyone's posts and comforted a bit. And will remember to pop on here rather than keep it all to myself!
Minisooty seems a bit constipated today. Health visitor due tomorrow so will get her advice. My dad suggested giving her water between feeds but I wasn't sure. She is formula fed, 5oz every 4-5 hours.
Aside from an emotional wreck I am ok. Having to get physio on my hip as doctors shoved it too far out to the right and upwards during her birth and so I'm a bit squinty!!
Hope everyone else is ok. I'm passing round the chocolates cause we totally deserve them!
Here's to having each other to talk to and all round!
sooty when LO was constipated the Dr and MW both recommended cooled, boiled water before a feed for 24hrs but the MW also added that the SMA formula we were using is a 'known constipator' so we changed to cow&gate. I'm not sure which move actually helped but the next day we got two big sloppy ones and I've never been so happy to see poo!!!
Also realised that by mixing the formula with the powder in the bottle first and then adding water to the appropriate level may not have been helping as there was effectively less water by as much as the volume of powder that had gone in first - if that makes sense!! It's only a small amount, but we're now doing water first or powder then measuring the water out in a separate bottle, just in case it makes a difference.
Gosh it almost sounds as if I know something about parenting
Hoping we all have lovely days today!!
<stuffs sooty's chocolates to keep awake during night feed>
Constipation, and the opposite, is a current topic of conversation in this house. Pip is on Gaviscon which thickens the milk in her stomach. We get a couple of days with no poo and then a 'poonami'. DD1 likes to help with nappy changes and she was stunned at how much poo can come out of a small body.
Unfortunately DD1's guts are playing up. She has stomach ache and verging on diarrhoea so we have to keep her home from school for a day or two and cut out dairy. DH has a lot of work to get done (working at home) so I can see some hours of Cbeebies with DD1 and pip in my bedroom.
With DD1 I used to dread her waking up because getting her to sleep was such a battle. As she started to sleep for longer periods, I would still wake up and need to check that she was still breathing. During the day I would look at the time and wonder how I was going to get through so many hours. But we got through them and, looking back 4 years later, it feels like the really tough bit was just a short period and the good times outweigh the bad times. I guess if it stayed so hard for too long there would be many more single child families.
Ha, it's a good point running - womble was definitely going to be an only child for the first few weeks of her life, but I must confess that I have been putting away the nicer of her clothes that she has outgrown "just in case."
Poo is also a frequent topic of conversation here. This morning she did an epic poop that was contained by the nappy because she was upright but of course there was no way to get her clothes off without lying her down, at which point it all ran out the back. Sigh. What are people using to get the stains out?
Oh I feel sorry for us all who are struggling! Even though Wriggler is #2, it's been so long since DS1 was a baby, I'd forgotten how relentless it all is. Currently waking every 3h through the night, which means wake, feed, change, try to get back to sleep - get maybe 2-2.5h sleep each time? Argh.
Wriggler did get better for a day or so after the cranial osteo, but the back tension came back after a couple of days and he needs seeing again (appt on 23/11).
We did have another spot of good luck though - the paed consultant decided to run a one-off extra session this Thursday afternoon so we got first dibs on an appt, and I took the first one - so that's 5d earlier than it was going to be, hurrah! And the GP has given me another referral letter which includes both things, the TT and the inguinal hernia, so I should be covered to be seen for both. Phew!
I can't wait to get him all fixed up - so he isn't writhing in so much pain after each feed!
Hugs all round. We CAN do this....
Liking the poonami stories. The other day DD was having some nappy off time, I turned my back for one second and she SQUIRTED a jet of poo at least a foot hitting her cot! Very funny. Had to stop DH from posting photo of explosive poo on FB. I know what you mean pinpan. A couple of friends have announced they're pregnant and I'm finding in ever do slightly jealous....
Am also packing clothes away just in case
Pinpan I soak stained clothes with Vanish powder (or Napisan when in Oz). Then wash the clothes. The stains do not usually come out completely, however hanging them in the sun works.
Napisan goes on the shopping list
Missed your question, Pinpan - I use Vanish/Napisan (all in one in Oz) as well.
For normal stainage, I use the in-wash powder (make sure you use the right amount or it marks the clothes itself), for cloth nappies I do an overnight soak in the powder, but for bad stains I have the liquid stain-remover which I rub into the clothes just prior to washing (can't then add it to the wash as well or = overdose and clothes discoloration).
I find the liquid stuff works even after you've washed it once without using it and the stain hasn't come out (amazingly!) - so try the in-wash stuff first, and then if it doesn't work, use the liquid stuff next time. I do also do overnight soaks on stuff if it's a big area/lots of clothes with bad stains on. But be careful to keep the metal fasteners out of the liquid if possible.
Oddly, the sun has never removed any stains here, despite hanging out for
several days in the strong Aussie sun!
Elvis - one of my friends was telling me about the time she was changing her oldest DD on the change table, and as she bent down to get whatever from the shelves underneath it, her DD did a poonami and it went all over her head and hair (friend, not the DD)!! <--- not envy!
I think I might have thrown up at that point if it had happened to me...
I have a moment of fear whenever I'm reaching below the change table - usually I remember to get the new nappy out and ready before unleashing the old one!
:D - me too, Pinpan, but that's cos I have boys, innit. Boys are renowned for unleashing their wee when their willies are in the open air. Wriggler has a fine line in arcing it into the washbowl, which is very helpful - but of course doesn't take account of the build up and die down, so that goes all over him/ changetable/ towel etc. Never mind, I'm doing a wash daily as it is!
OMG a 6 hour stretch! Just as I was at breaking point from the lack of sleep! On the downside I'm massively engorged & my sheets are a pool of leaked milk. Back to sleep, QUICK!
I'm sleeping in a support vest so I can keep the breast pads on all night as well - saves the dribbling! Congrats on a 6h stretch, that's fab! I look forward to one of those.
Drat, you have just reminded me that I leaked on the sheets last night during a paltry 4 hour sleep, and didn't put them in the wash today because the womble has been growth spurt eating all day. Apart from one hour when she slept and I made an awesome beef stew for tonight, hooray!
pinpan you actually have time to make dinner?!!
<feels faint at such accomplishments>
Me & DH are surviving on ready meals otherwise we'd scoff toast all day!!
Starting to get little baby-smiles now - makes up for everything! (yes they are real ones, not just the wind ones - he looks at me and does big gummy grins! )
We've been getting smiles too; DD1 giggling seems to make her smile, which is very cute! So far I'd say they're more of an attempt at a grin than an actual grin, but she's getting there Six weeks old tomorrow.
Today we took Eleanor for an ultrasound scan of her hips, due to family history of hip dysplasia. Everything looked fine (which we were pretty sure it would; just wanted to be on the safe side), although she screamed herself purple when the sonographer had to hold her still. And afterwards I breastfed in public, for the first time ever! It was in the hospital waiting room, in chairs which faced the window, on the 3rd floor. If there was anyone in the building opposite they might have gotten an eyeful, but never mind
Loopy, it's the first time I've cooked in, oooh, seven and a half weeks? So don't feel too faint! Who knows when I will manage it again... Even DH hasn't done a lot of cooking, like you we have been eating freezer fodder and things delivered by friends
and a heck of a lot of takeaway. I can definitely see a lot of casseroles in our future though - much easier to cook at whatever time of day the womble appears to have gone to sleep at than to try in the evening!
Lots of smiles here too, hooray! We also had a hip ultrasound today Earnest, as the GP thought one of them was clicking at her six week check. They reckoned she was all fine, but she too screamed herself purple - one of those great wails that goes on so long that you start saying "breathe, girl, breathe!"
Tonguetie snipped! HUrrah! Consultant was a top bloke, did it with no problem, and Wriggler is now on the waiting list for the hernia repair, some time within 6 weeks (but hopefully sooner than that). Yay! My poor nips might get some respite in a couple of days.
Brilliant news! Glad everything is heading in right direction
I'm having just a
fucking awful day...again in fact as yesterday wasn't too spectacular either
Baby Loopy has been unsettled all day & although DH is working from home & I wanted to do everything myself to prove (to myself) that I could look after him without help, it failed spectacularly. I haven't been out for days & when I thought I should take the baby out for a walk, he completely cracked up & screamed the house down - which upset DH & me too So ended up staying in...again
I'm also beginning to get really
fucked off frustrated that I can't do anything without it taking major planning - a shower, the washing up, sterilising the bloody bottles for the billionth time I need 10 minutes to myself.
I may have PND or I might just be really knackered - but how can I rest when the baby rests if the baby doesn't want to bloody rest?!?
On top of all of this, I'm dreading my mum coming visiting next week, no doubt ready to criticise everything I'm doing & seeing how badly I'm "coping".
Bollucks, I want my old life and even just to write that down makes me feel ashamed of myself & tears are pouring down my face
Sorry for the me post, I just needed to get it out somewhere.
Loopy Don't beat yourself up, you're doing brilliantly. Even on the good days it's bloody hard work, and when they're being difficult or won't sleep it's 100x worse. Does DH help in the evenings? I've been a parent for 2 years and 8 months now and I still find myself counting the minutes till DH gets home in the evening; there's no shame in needing a hand, honestly.
The only advice I have is to take it one day at a time. And try to remember that we're all struggling; even those who make it look easy have bad days behind closed doors.
loopy you are doing really well. This is definitely the hardest thing I've ever done and what you are describing is exactly what I think sometimes too. It's normal. Honestly. Have you talked to your husband about how you're feeling? Or if you can't how about your HV or GP? Noone will think you're a bad mum but they will be pleased you're being open and honest about it.
People keep saying it'll get better and that's what I'm clinging to. If baby goes mental when you try and leave the house, go anyway. For your own sanity. Or Could u go for a walk around the block and leave baby with DH? Don't try to prove anything to yourself but accept and recognise the support that's available. You will be fine and YOU'RE NOT ALONE
Hang in there Loopy - you can do this, I'm sure of it.
Please make use of DH while he's there, wasn't that part of the point of him working from home this week? And you never know - next week baby Loopy may be more settled, and you could feel more in your stride and wonder why you were so hard on yourself this week?
Although its easy for me to say that...
As far as PND goes you know best how you feel and should trust your instincts. If you've felt this way for a few days there's no harm in telling the Dr or HV - its what they're there for and sometimes saying the words out loud to a 3rd party can really help to get it straight in your own mind.
I found that leaving DH in charge of baby for 30 mins while I went for a walk in the fresh air REALLY helped...
Can I also mention a mates website to everyone? I've suffered with depression for years and so has my friend who set this up - please pass it on to anyone you think may benefit from it x
I loopy I'm so sorry you've had such a crap day!! I second what everyone else says to not be so hard on yourself.
Sometimes even if minisooty is screaming I just stuff her in the pram and get out. I've walked round my village the pair of us crying but I did feel better after. And yes to trying to get even an hour on your own to chill.
But def try to talk to someone if you are feeling blue. How old is your baby now??
Feel a bit odd writing this. HV did the Edinburgh depression scale on me I scored a 10, she thinks I'm mildly depressed... But that's it. She's not back till next month.
Does anyone know what a 10 actually means? I don't even know what to write I'm so confused by this.
loopy just thinking of wee things to help you, what kind of steriliser are you using? We have a microwave one and it is brilliant, very very quick and easy with no faffing about.
Also not sure if you are formula feeding but we use the ready made formula. It's slightly more expensive and comes in a big bottle you store in the fridge. But I find it much easier than powder stuff.
I know it's not much but maybe little things can help you?
Weesooty - I scored 8 on the scale when I visited the clinic last week, and the nurse told me that 10 was the score where they start to wonder about PND. So it means you're borderline, I guess. My sis scored 13 after her 2nd baby, but it wasn't exactly PND, more general depression due to known factors (like no money).
Loopy - it's the sheer bloody relentlessness of it all that gets me down - it never stops! But it really does get easier - the first 6w are hell on wheels for most people. (((hugs))) and really do use your DH now and your mum next week as much as you can - it's all right in theory to try and prove that you are self-sufficient and can do it all, but in reality you need to sleep to get your equilibrium back and then you will find you can cope better. Even if your mum does get snippy with you, just try and let it wash over you, so long as she lets you get some rest. If she doesn't help out, throw her out!
I agree with the microwave sterilising unit - brilliantly easy. (although I no longer have a microwave and will need to sterilise some bottles and the expressing pump soon, for whenever Wriggler goes into hospital)
With DD1 I scored about 10 on the depression scale. I don't think I had PND, I was just finding it all bloody hard. I too wanted my old life back and was so tired and annoyed with myself because I couldn't do it all.
Loopy DH used to take DD1 out for a 30 minute walk sometimes so that I could shower / eat / rest. When DH was away I would take her out even if she was screaming. Usually she stopped crying and fell asleep after 10 minutes. I always felt the screaming was easier to deal with outside. It didn't seem so loud.
I will never forget one day in the gp's waiting room. DD1 was crying and I felt so embarrassed. I thought every one was looking at me a d judging me. After I had seen the gp, I was walking to my car when I went past an elderly man who had been in the waiting room. He stopped me and said I should never ever be embarrassed about my baby crying because it is what all babies do. He was so kind.
My solution to getting a shower when DD is awake is to put her in either her car seat or bouncer chair in the bathroom doorway. There is not much space so it's a bit tricky. But this way DD can see me and I know she is ok even if she is crying. Also the sound of the shower can be quite soothing to her.
weesooty do you warm the readymix formula? I've thought about getting it for when I'm out and about (although if its that much easier I might use it all the time...) but when we got a carton and tried it on baby he wasn't much impressed and I thought perhaps that was because it was room temp?
If you do heat it how do you prefer to do it?
running that is exactly how I feel. Not depressed, just so so tired and I miss the old me. I love minisooty to bits but its relentless!
I really want to tell my mum and dad how I feel as I am close to them but I'm ashamed to admit it. I mean most people have babies and they cope... I should too
pheebs when we are out I use the wee cartons at room temperature. I keep one in the pram under the blankets so it's a bit warmer. Minisooty is never impressed at the coolness but she does drink it. She had room temp milk right at the start tho so she's used to it. It's only normally one room temp feed every couple of days so I don't bother too much about it although I was thinking I could ask cafe to warm it up maybe.
At home we use the big bottle of ready made milk, it keeps in fridge for 48 hours and we warm the bottles in our wee bottle warmer.
Hope that helps.
OMG a huge spider has just run across my bed! DH saw it first. We caught it with the top from a baby bottle and a drink mat and threw it outside. We do often get these big spiders in the house but I have only ever seen them on the floor. I am generally ok with spiders but not on my bed.
Pheebs pip will spit out milk that is not warm enough. I am very bad and use the microwave to warm it. However I only have about 20ml in the bottle (to add Gaviscon to it), so I shake the bottle a lot when it is warm since this gets the Gaviscon to dissolve and I am confident that there can be no hotspots. With DD1 I started off warming formula correctly, in a bowl of hot water but I did switch to using the microwave because I am too impatient. I do always check that the milk does not feel too warm on the inside of my wrist before giving it.
Relentless is exactly the word! I scored 6 on the scale this week, but if I had taken it when I was referred to the excellent "try to catch PND early" service six weeks ago, I'm pretty sure it would have been way over 10. So it does get better, I promise! (You reach the magic six week mark and start living for the magic twelve week mark! But at the same time start to enjoy the good bits much more. Coz there are more good bits, and you'll get more sleep, and get more used to less sleep.) xx
Nearly at the 6w mark and getting proper big grins now - pic on my profile if anyone would like to see
Things are starting to settle down a bit - more time where he will just lie/reclne and look around in the day, and more sleeping at night.
Feeding is less painful already, and somewhat less spitting up going on - but still lots of gut bubbling, although I'm not sure how much of that is hernia-related.
Everything going in the right direction though!
It will get better, for all of us.
My baby looks like he's been in a car accident. He's got spots and scratches all over his face, bright pink veins on his eyelids and dark circles round his eyes.
I'm not sure I look any healthier.
We've spent the week on the sofa (DH and I sort of taking it in turns) with the baby sleeping on the v-shape pillow. Its the only way he seems to want to sleep, the minute I put him in the moses basket he wakes up and cries. I wonder if its because the pillow provides a bit of a replica cuddle, or because his top half can be slightly raised, but its really not doing my back and hips any good, and I don't want to still be doing this when mum takes over from DH.
Should I just put him in the basket anyway and wait out the moaning? should I stick with the sofa if thats how he's happy? Is this something he'll grow out of?
I thought that when the infacol started working he might be happy to be flat on his back again, but even though the wind is reducing he still only settles when he's held in an almost upright position!
He's been taking the infacol for four days today and even though things are improving I'm wondering if we ought to change his feed again. This formula seems quite frothy when you mix it, but the bubbles won't be going through the teat would they? Mum has also suggested that having the slow-flow teats (for newborns) might not be helping - he's a big baby (9lb at birth and 10lb 2 at the last check and I'm frankly scared to weigh him again and find out how much more enormous he is) and she thinks he might need a larger teat hole to get bigger mouthfuls 'cos he might be gulping air down whilst trying to get more milk with each go...
But its all guesswork!!! Do I just try it all???
Thumb I love your beautiful smiling baby pic - thanks for posting it
pinpan I am living for the magic six week point!! Its great to know it actually is something to look forward to!
Has anyone heard from Loopy? Just thinking of her and hoping she's having a better few days
Pheebs, try propping up your Moses basket - you can put a serious amount of padding under the mattress, or phone books under the whole thing. Made a big difference to the womble acceptance factor at the beginning.
A fully milked-up baby is the very definition of the word 'replete', isn't it? I love it when Wriggler decides he's full and just rolls away from the boob with that utterly smugly satisfied look on his face!
Agree with propping up the Moses basket (although for some reason I've heard you're not supposed to put stuff under the mattress, just prop the whole thing up one end, but I don't know what the logic is behind that )
Wriggler also has full-on milk acne all over his cheeks and various scratches where he bashes himself in the face every now and then. I've already had to cut his fingernails twice
Just waiting for my hair and nails to revert to pre-pg state - hair is still thick and lush, and fingernails are long and strong. This won't last <sigh> but I have managed to find the time, Lord only knows how, to actually paint my fingernails with sparkly nail varnish, which is cheering me up every time I see it
So, today I have had milk spilled back upon my face, in my mouth, down my front, into my bra and over my trousers. I've had a poosplosion that waited until the nappy was gone so that the change table could be half an inch thick in it. I was late for my local parenting coffee group because I had to change everyone's clothes but didn't have time or opportunity for a shower. Then I won wailiest baby of the group AGAIN while having to watch other babies eating nicely, burping gently on demand and them being happy to go flat on their backs on the floor to be played with. Indulged in some serious self pity on the walk home. Can someone remind me that it's worth it please?
Mmmm puke on your face - lovely! I am sure you have a twin of DD1. On more than one occasion Iifted her legs while changing her and she would fire the poo cannon. It would travel over a metre. I even had to clean it out of an electricity socket once. Also, when flying into Brisbane once, she threw up down my top so I had to go through immigration and customs with a bra full of baby sick.
It really does get better. DD1 has gone from being the noisiest, worst sleeper of the group to the one that let me have lie ins at the weekend, sometimes till 9am. We also had very little trouble with her as a toddler.
It's not all perfect though. DD1 had me up at 1.30 am because she needed the toilet and then couldn't get back to sleep. Now it is 4am and I am holding DD2 upright after feeding, hoping DD1 doesn't wake again and needing matchsticks for my eyes.
Thanks running! How do you clean an electric socket? It was mostly still milk rather than vom to be fair, but I didn't enjoy it much. She had a 2 hour nap after lunch so I got some sleep too, and now she is snoozing on me (very cute) while I watch Ecclipse, so I will try to forgive her the teary feeding tantrum that came in between! The Internet reckons a brain growth spurt happens this week so perhaps by next week she'll be doing calculus or something.
It's 5am. I remember being a student and being able to cope with being up 24 hours and still looking good and smiling. What has happened to me?!! I need sleep!! Minisooty won't sleep!!!
WeeSooty also remember those heady, carefree, student days!! Baby Loopy not sleeping either!! Gaaaah!!
Thanks everyone for your support a few days ago when I was having a meltdown, feels comforting that I'm not alone <blows kisses to everyone>
And Baby Loopy properly smiled for the first time last night (@4 weeks old), it was such a heart melting moment
Seems a few Of us are up right now...!
Aw, congrats on the smile Loopy!
Makes it all worth it.
Aww loopy that's great. How r u feeling?
Msinterpret how r u? 5am is no fun!!!
Feeling a bit better, thanks WeeSooty, I guess there'll always be bad & good days
And thanks Pheebs for asking after me too
Bought an ErgoBaby this weekend, anyone have one of these or similar carrier?
Mini sooty, mini loopy and mini interpret should make friends! Womble has been snoozing on me for ages now though she does keep wailing in her sleep every now and then! Hope she sleeps tonight.
Lol minisooty also wails in her sleep. It's so weird!! Sometimes she sounds like an old fashioned kettle whistle and others she just whimpers! It's very cute!
Must be having bad dreams, like the milk being taken away before she's full!
Loopy we have an ergo with the newborn insert. If we can't get baby thunder to sleep at night we put him in the carrier, walk round for 5 mins and then put him down in the Moses basket in the insert - he stays asleep brilliantly!
That's great Thunder hope I'm as successful!!
Unfortunately wallking at the moment is ultra painful as I seem to have developed sciatica It makes rocking & walking Baby Loopy to sleep really very difficult so now back at the doctors to see what painkillers I can throw down my throat!!
Obviously you are all having a similar night to me!! MORNING!! Gah, baby elvis has decided that being wide awake and screaming from9-1.30 am is entirely reasonable and has chosen to do that for the last few nights. I'm knackered and finding it really difficult. The only thing that soothes is boob. Anyone else having this? What do u all think of dummies? She's four weeks old and just wants to nurse. Nothing wrong with that, per se, but I'd like to sleep!
Hi loopy had been wondering if you were ok and thunder I was worried we hadn't seen you since 'that' poster last week.
We've got an ergo sling, I may try that tonight if nothing else works. <steals runnings matchsticks>
elvis big hugs from me. Baby Loopy thinks its acceptable to stay awake from 3 or 4am on a daily basis, not too sure how to break this habit?!!
Pheebs how's Baby Pheebs doing? Any luck with Moses basket? Baby Loopy didnt like to settle in carrycot much either (& doesn't always settle now) but we found persevering with it in the day helped get him used to it at night & we always use a hot water bottle (as pinpan said I think to fool them that they were still getting hugs!)
Yes the Ergo worked a treat for me yesterday!! Baby Loopy was crying for an hour with DH but 10 mins in the Ergo on me & he slept for 90 minutes!! It hurt my back much less than holding him & I was able to have a little walk round the village & see a couple of friends I can't seem to put his legs inside the insert though, he wriggles too much !! Am hoping he was still comfy though...
Sorry for multiple posts!! Can someone send me the link to the f/n group? Weesooty did send it to me but I think it 'expired' before I got a chance to do it?
Baby is still not happy left in his moses basket loopy - its hugs or nothing at the minute he gave DH a right night of it last night and only settled when I took him to bed with me and he slept on face down on my chest for 4hrs fortunately I've never been a fidget at night or it doesn't bear thinking about... I will try the hot water bottle trick though!
I'm really not sure what's keeping him awake, and wonder if not wanting the moses basket is the symptom of being kept up rather than the cause, although he's less scritchy so I think the infacol has been working on his wind issues. I am going to buy a Ewan today as DH is back to work saturday so no more sharing night shifts.
elvis I've used the dummy to settle him twice before when he just wants soothing and not changing/feeding/entertaining. Other occasions I thought it might help he just refused it so I think your baby will tell you if its the right thing. The best advice I've seen is that dummies are only a 'problem' if they're used as more than a tool to help baby go to sleep when they're struggling to do so.
p.s. AIBU to be really pissed off that a friends baby of only a few days difference in age is sleeping 6hrs straight a night? I'm totally
Not unreasonable at all Pheebs, how bloody dare they?!!!
Hopefully they'll turn into a nightmare toddler
elvis dummies have been brilliant for us! Started using them from 3 weeks and had no problems at all. T will happily switch between dummies/bottles/nipples without issue.
Wasn't put off by that poster, I just struggle to type one handed on my iPhone . Have been reading lots though.
Loopy I struggle with legs inside the insert; i don't worry about it too much though.
Well, got the call today to say that Wriggler is on the list to have his hernia repair tomorrow - eek! I mean, great too - but it's just a bit scary, he's only 6wo after all and it's a general anaesthetic. FX it all goes well - he has to have finished his last feed by 5am, be at the hospital for 7am and his op is at 8am. He should be out by 9:30am but we may have to stay in overnight because of his age. DS1 is at grandma's tonight and tomorrow, so that's one less stress.
Yes, good luck thumb keeping everything crossed!
Thanks for understanding Loopy, and I bought a hot water bottle last night during a last-minute nappy dash so will try using it with the moses basket tonight (hopeful smiley?)
I would also like to pick the brains of any of you with experience of babies with reflux - I did the dreaded internet trawl of symptoms and found a lady whose child did the same as mine and thought it was all down to wind but was told by her dr that it was reflux and the treatment worked, SO, does this sound like it could be reflux?:
Crying, stretching out and arching back, pulling at clothes etc after feeding
Unable to settle lying on his back - has to be upright or semi-upright
Likes to be kept moving (though it doesn't necessarily keep him asleep)
Waking after 5 mins of being put on his back, crying again
He isn't bringing up milk as I thought he would if he has reflux, and def has a wind problem because it takes ages to bring any up and he farts A LOT. The Infacol seemed to be having an effect, but he's back to being as bad as before despite being on the double dose now...
I realise I should probably start a thread with this question - but I do value your opinions as I feel I know you all a bit
Good luck thumb hope it goes well & your LO recovers quickly x
Good luck thumb; hope T recovers quickly.
Just bought baby thunder a fisher price swing seat; it is amazing! Put him in it and within minutes he was fast asleep! Might go and have a quick nap myself
Hello waves can I join you ladies? DS1 was due in December but turned up on 25th October. After 2 weeks in scbu he came home 2 weeks ago and I'm still fairly useless at this whole motherhood thing!
Thunder am of your seat, it's hit & miss whether Baby Loopy likes to go in rocker or not - then it might be hours or just a few minutes.
Welcome Honeymum, you're in good company! Mine was born on the 21st & I'm still clueless!!
Who was it who mentioned warming milk in the microwave? Do you just pop bottle in the microwave & zap it?
I'm fed up of Baby Loopy screaming the place down while I wait for the milk to warm in warm water, it takes forever
Hi HoneyMum! Tell us all about your DS
Thanks DS is our first DC. He was born at 33+3 after my waters went spontaneously. I had been in the week before when they thought he might be coming so had had steroids then. Had my usual MW appt on the following Wednesday and the heartbeat seemed fast so she sent me to the hospital to have a trace. They kept me in and went into labour in the night. Was 4cm at about 4am and he was with us by 9am. 4lb 14oz. Whisked straight off to scbu where he was on oxygen for 20 hours but progressed really well and he came home 2 weeks later.
We're EBF at the moment but don't know how long that will last as he's a demanding little thing- he's feeding every hour and a half to 2 hours and I'm exhausted! He's currently asleep on me and sucking his thumb
pretending he's adorable even though he's been awful all day
We haven't got as far as getting into any routine yet!
Awww, he sounds both adorable and awful! I haven't got a routine yet and my girl was full term and is now nearly 9 weeks old, so don't go making me feel bad by getting into one any time soon.
No chance of that, don't worry!
Hope all goes well thumb
pheebs what you are describing could be silent reflux. I am on my phone so can't do links, but google cryingoverspiltmilk. It is the website of the New Zealand reflux society and has details of silent reflux. DD1 had silent reflux and was much as you describe.
However, if you are breast feeding, the other cause of wind could be oversupply (google kellymom for this). I didn't realise at the time but I also had this with DD1. I was producing too much milk, especially fore milk. She was feeding in only 5-10 minutes. The problem with only getting foremilk is that it is high in lactose. Her stomach was digesting all the lactose it could but the excess would go into her intestine wher the natural bacteria would digest the lactose. When bacteria digest lactose they produce gas i.e. farts. With DD2 I have made sure that I do not end up with the same problem by making sure that the same boob is used for at least 15 minutes. So if she only does a short feed I offer the same boob first at the next feed.
If you do think your DC has reflux, try putting blocks or books under the head end of the Moses basket or cot. Keep littlepheebs upright for at least 15 minutes after feeding. I have also found that putting DD down to sleep on her left side rather than her back helps. This is against the SIDS guidelines though.
Loopy I mentioned microwaving milk before. I do just shove the bottle in the microwave. We are advised not to do this because of the risk of hot spots however I think if you shake the bottle well that should not be a problem. Do not rely on how warm the outside of the bottle feels to tell you if the milk is the right temperature. The milk can get hotter than the bottle.
Pip had her 6 week check on Monday. All went well until the gp listened to her heart. We have been referred to the hospital for a possible heart murmer. I am trying hard to stay away from google. Hopefully we will be seen soon and it turns out to be nothing. DH goes away for work on Saturday. He will be gone until just before Christmas so I will have to deal with all hospital trips alone, while also getting DD1 to and from school.
What is this weather like?!? It's blowing a gale here! Bit scary!
running try not to worry about the heart murmur. Both my mum and DH have one and it has never given them any problems. Hope you will be ok with your DH away, do you have other support?
Hi honey I'm so glad your DS is doing well you must have got a shock with him being so early! My DD is 6 weeks and I still feel clueless!
thunder I'm majorly jealous of your seat. Minisooty only wants to be held. Nothing else will do!
Thinking of you today thumb hope your DS is ok.
loopy did u get the Facebook link? I'm on phone so can't send it just now.
How is everyone else?
We are ok today, just tired! Went for an hour and a half walk yesterday and my legs are so sore today!!!
I haven't yet WeeSooty, I know you sent it to me last time but I can't see it in full on the phone - I'll take a look next time I'm on the laptop!
So far, so good today. Which is good as yesterday I felt like walking out because Baby Loopy was restless & unsettled all day & wouldn't be comforted & I said to DH that I felt like life was a pile of bull
shit Today it's a completely different story - why is that?!
Babies are such a mystery...
Babyhoney seems on a similar schedule to baby loopy- was a terror yesterday but has been wonderful today!
Awesome tummy time (proper press ups) and toy grabbing this morning! Womble is now snoozing to the Beatles while I boogee round the kitchen and DH has a "quick" shower (for him, this is 15 minutes), then it's off to pick up the fond grandparents from the airport. Oh, and the sun is shining. Some days are better than others!
pinpan so true!! Yesterday Baby Loopy was the devil child, today he's been an angel mostly
although now he appears to be crying for no real reason
running thanks for the info - reading the influx website has reassured me that LO's problems are colic/wind, but I will think more about the lactose intolerance. I hope the poss murmur turns out to be nothing, but better to be checked out and know for sure.
I was so concerned with LO's constant moaning yesterday that we took him to the GP who could find nothing physically wrong which is super, so we'll keep trying all things until we find something that works or he grows out of it - starting with a new formula. He's been as bad again today but the sling trick seems to have stopped working so it feels like we're starting from scratch again . Trouble with being sleep deprived is that its hard to think of/remember what we can try next! DH downloaded some white noise tracks but the baby didn't seem impressed!
pinpan I'm trying really hard to get my shower time down to 15mins lol!! I have good intentions, but the minute I'm in there its so nice that its time all for me I get a bit carried away and come out half an hour later
Ok - the hoover noise seems to be working its magic on the baby, but is totally freaking my dog out.
Can't please everyone I guess....
God what a night Had an amazing day yesterday with Baby Loopy, he slept & played like an angel...since 8.30pm though, it's like he's been possessed... I've only just got him to sleep!! Anyone matchsticks leftover?!
And I got an arsey look from DH when I dared suggest working in an office was easier than looking after a newborn all day
And hugs to all those old friends who aren't posting but might be reading, miss you <waves>
Loopy sorry you have had a tough night. I am up for pip's second feed. She fell asleep earlier than I had expected at 8pm and then woke at 1am and now. So a good night but I am still not satisfied! I wish she didn't always wake at 5 because I can't go back to sleep since I need to get up at about 6 to have my shower before waking DD1 up for school.
I do agree with you, a baby is harder than working for the first 3 months. Then hopefully the baby gets easier. If your baby grows into a very lively toddler then that is also more tiring. With DD1 I used to feel that going to work on a Monday was a rest after a weekend of keeping her entertained and out of mischief.
Loopy I have sent u a pm
I am so tired this morning. I totally see how sleep deprevation is a torture method I know there are good days and bad. Need to remember that!
Ugh baby honey has woken and wanted feeding every hour and a half-2 hours all night. So tired.
Wriggler has had his hernia op and all went well, he was out of theatre before we'd even started to wonder how he was going! He has a 2" wound though, where DS1's was only about 1/2" - apparently it was a big hernia (thought so!)
Had to stay in overnight, mostly just to be on the safe side but as he needed pain relief at about 10pm, it was a good plan - and a better one when he did a massive poosplosion in the early hours of the morning, all over my vest top and the chair bed (I was in the middle of changing him and he just let rip - jet propelled missile!) because the nurse helped clean it up
Rotten sleep though and given that I was up at 4am yesterday, I'm suffering from sleep deprivation. Have had a sleep this afternoon but still have a headache.
Running - verrry interesting what you say about oversupply - sounds like that could also be contributing to Wriggler's issues so will adopt your plan too, thanks!
Heart murmur - DS1 had a possible heart murmur picked up by the GP - turned out to be nothing on investigation but they just have to check. Hope that's the case for you too.
Hello Honeymum - best baby book I ever read was by Libby Purves and she said don't even try to get a routine with first baby, just enjoy doing things as and when [paraphrasing] for as long as you can get away with. That cheered me right up
as routine is not my normal state
Newborn babies are way harder than a day in the office! Maybe not quite as tiring as a hard day's manual labour but that's about it! I keep having to remind DH about this as well
Hi everyone... I am reading but just don't seem to be able to keep up and post.
And judging by my ranty pants on Facebook you'll be glad I'm not -need my own thread for that--
Just wanted to say Thumb Glad to hear all went well with the op, was thinking of you xx
thumbwitch glad DS is doing well. Can you get a sneaky nap at some point during the day?
Also thanks for advice re:routine. Libby purves sounds very sensible!
routine is not my default setting either
Ergh horrible night here too...little man has a blocked nose and seems to be going through a growth spurt. Lots of crying for no obvious reason as well...not helping my headache!
And DH is off with man-flu so the house is also a mess and full of germs.
Crikey - was it a full moon or something last night?
Also exhausted this morning as LO decided to be awake and crying until 2am when he fell asleep in the carrier and I slept with him in it, on me...
DH has had his flight details through too and will need to leave in the early hours unless I can persuade him to go tonight so he's not driving tired. It means mum is on her way - phew!
She's never had a colicky baby though, and she has a cold so it could get inneresting
thumb so pleased for you that all went well - have this one tonight to celebrate
Nice one thumb!
Exhausted here too, DS has taken to waking every hour or so the past few nights and has a halfhearted feed for about 5 minutes before dropping off again only to wake again an hour later still hungry....and yet today here he is sleeping merrily in the sling (argh my back) for the past 3 hours!!
I'm out to see Rufus Wainwright tomorrow night yay! DH will be in charge and DS may or may not take expressed milk eek
Pip seems to have decided that sleep is not required this evening. Every time I think she has fallen asleep and I put her in her Moses basket she wakes again. I have been up since 4.30am. DH is leaving at 7 tomorrow morning. I am so tired. I have not got any milk expressed to add Gaviscon to so even when I do get pip to sleep I will have to stay up until I have pumped enough.
Sorry this is a self indulgent whinge. Just not having a good time right now.
Ooh running what a time you're having! Hope little running has a sleepy day tomorrow to make up for it... have you got some help lined up while DH is away?
I feel bad to say now that LO has had a really peaceful day today - typical as I have mum here and, yet again, as soon as there's someone other than me and DH in the room he's an angel. I swear no-one believes we've had scritchy, sleepless nights!!!
But fingers crossed it could be the new formula having the desired effect and we'll have a lovely few days before the next parenting challenge
Started wearing my pre-preggo bras again today and discovered they are crap so will treat myself to a couple of new ones that will actually fit - don't know if they never did or if my boobs have changed for good . Still not back into my jeans or wedding rings so will make more of an effort to walk the dog myself instead of guilting others into it...
I have given up wearing bras entirely at the moment - probably to the terminal detriment of my boobs! - I wear support vests instead, much easier and more comfortable. They have an extra bit inside with elastic underneath to hold the boobs up a bit more.
I have managed to get back to pre-pg weight and clothes though; but I have a floppy apron of flesh that looks like it's never going to go away (judging by friends' past experiences) so I'll never be supermodel material
as though I ever was!!
Still can't wear my rings though - haven't been able to for a couple of years, I need to lose at least a stone in weight to get them back on comfortably - part of the problem though is that as it gets hotter here, I get a sort of dermatitis under the rings from the dried sweat, so even if they fit properly, wearing them is hard.
Wriggler is doing well but needed some more panadol (calpol) last night; he's pooing lots - which is good - and still has some air and pain problems but it seems to be diminishing now. Am still low on sleep too, didn't get as good a night last night as I woudl have liked but am hoping to catch up a bit more today.
Hope the rest of you are getting more sleep now - sorry to hear you've had such a shocker of a night, Running
DH took pip for a while last night and she did a massive burp. This morning she has been farting almost continuously. Maybe I shouldn't have eaten a Thai bean curry yesterday.
I got about 4 hours sleep last night. DH has gone now. I have a fairly busy day. DD1 has ballet then her school Christmas fair. I prefer days like this since I don't have to think about what to do with DD1.
I don't have any support when DH is away. Most of my family are in Oz. I have a cousin who has helped in an emergency, such as when I had to spend a few days in hospital. I have booked DD1 into after school club one day a week but I don't have any one who could take pip. I just need to take each day as it comes and accept that I am not supermum. The house will be a mess and I will consider success being days that we food and clothes.
Mmm must be tired. My typing is rubbish. I meant days that we have food and clothes would be a success.
Pheebs/Thumbwitch I'm not in pre-preg clothes yet but maternity jeans all feel very loose now. Plus all my old clothes are in the loft
which I can't be arsed to get, nor have the time I'd love to go for a few walks round the village to help weight loss but my sciatica prevents me from doing that as its too bloody painful. I currently spend Tuesdsy to Friday (& most of the weekend too) holed up in the house, it's pretty shite in all honesty.
Running sympathies on your crappy night & absent DH. Mine works in London so is pretty much out the house from 5.30am to 8.30pm daily and in all honesty, if I get breakfast, lunch & I get dressed then I consider those as good days. Forget about tidying etc (and in my case showering most days!! ) & just concentrate on the now.
Unbelievably, Baby Loopy fed at 7.30pm then not til 1.30am & then slept til 6.30am!! Is this a sign of things to come?!!
Loopy - I'd like to say I hope so but IME one good night isn't necessarily the start of a pattern. It is a very welcome relief though!
literally a pain in the arse. I had it for years before getting pg even, and had to see an osteopath to get it sorted. But he was excellent and stopped me from suffering with it through my first pg; and then we moved over to Australia and the woman I see over here stopped it from being a massive issue through this pg as well. She also kept on top of the SPD, which is slowly disappearing. So I suppose I'm suggesting that you find an osteopath who is used to treating pregnant and post-pregnant women to see if they can sort it out for you.
Hi all! You've dropped off my active threads!
thumb glad the op went ok. Woo hoo!
running I think you're right. As long as you've all eaten, the rest can wait. Shane you've no support though. You can always come and moan to us? <helpful emocion>
Baby elvis (Lisa Marie?) slept for 5 hours last night but I'm not hopeful as she did this last week and was really
mental unsettled for 3 nights afterwards. We had baby photos done yesterday which may have worn her out too. DH was holding her with her nappy off to do a cute shot, and she had a major poosplosion on his hands!!! HAHAHA
That would have made a memorable photo.
- it would too!
Borrowing this from another thread I'm on - another MNer told me this:
"When I was doing my nurse training, my best friend was working on the children's ward, and saw an absolutely epic poosplosion. They had a baby in with gastroenteritis, who had the worst diarrhoea, and the mum, having changed and cleaned the baby, was bouncing him up and down on her lap before putting the clean nappy on. Big mistake. Huge. Apparently it went everywhere, and the mum sat in shock, holding the poosplosioning baby at arm's length, with an utterly bemused look on her face, until rescued by the nursing staff!"
That would have been horrendous! But I bet the nurses were sniggering too.
Thumb I guess that is a story the mum will be telling her son's girlfriends for years.
Hope everyone is doing ok. I feel so much better this morning. I got about 5.5 hours sleep last night which is better than the last few nights. I took pip to the gp yesterday and got ranitidine. Hopefully she will start to feel more comfortable soon. I also borrowed a baby swing from a friend. Put pip in it yesterday evening and she fell asleep.
I have a coffee morning today with parents from DD1's class. It will be good to have some adult conversation.
My turn to have a bad night - combination of a baby trying to get used to the new situation re. his bowel etc. and the godawful heat (thundery heatwave) - I don't think I had more than 2h sleep together. And he's had troubles napping for more than half an hour at a time today. So he's tired, I'm knackered and it's still too bloody hot.
OK - has anyone actually found that reaching the 'magic' 6 week mark has actually helped? Mum and Sis keep on about it but I'm not convinced... I'd love to think another two weeks will make a difference!
Thumb I'm having the opposite problem - its suddenly gone chilly and our flat doesn't have any heating apart from one gas fire in the front room and small oil-filled rads in the bedrooms which don't seem powerful enough for the baby, not sure what I'll do when winter fully kicks in
start searching the argos catalogue for more heaters
My biggest issue at the mo is mum being here! We don't get on brilliantly at the best of times, but I was prepared for all the things she does that annoy me - but it turns out the baby's fine if she feeds and puts him to bed - he'll sleep 4 hrs, its only with ME he scritches and only sleeps for 30 mins it is literally pushing me over the edge...
Hello all - am still here though useless at posting it seems. Sleep is pretty non-existent around here boo! T had his 8 week jabs yesterday and the BCG today, fine with both thankfully. 4 weeks from yesterday is Xmas Eve - we won't be around if they want to do his 12 week jabs then. Is it ok to reschedule so they'll be a bit later?
maketea I would've thought its ok, but I guess it may depend on how long you needed to wait? They must have to be flexible for chidlings that are unwell etc so can't have jabs? TBH I reckon when they realise the date they will want to rearrange - I can't imagine my GP will be working xmas eve!!
Feeling both guilty and smug about last post - didn't mention that mum was up ALL NIGHT with baby because I could not function, hence guilty, the smug bit is that she fed him an hour ago and put him to bed and he only slept 30mins!!!
Am super relieved that I am not as totally useless as I thought - it felt like I was either going mad and imagining things or a rubbish parent
Of course you're not useless Pheebs! Bet the four hour sleep with your mum was totally a fluke. I found that there was a gradual improvement, rather than a sudden change at six weeks, but it was definitely perceptible at six weeks. That said, I'm at 9 weeks now and hanging out for the 'magic' 12 week marker...
I don't suppose it will make you feel any better Pheebs but the magic 6w mark was fully buggered for me by Wriggler's op. He's been restless and unsettled since, as I've posted - and last night was another shocker. Partly the muggy weather, partly still he's not quite right. AND he seems to have forgotten how to co-ordinate drinking and breathing all the time; every now and then he forgets to breathe while he's latched on and suddenly starts flailing around and I have to unlatch him if he doesn't manage to pull away himself!
I fully sympathise with the business with your Mum and yes, what a relief that he did the 30mins thing for her too - see it is him and not you!
Maketea - shouldn't be a massive issue, as Pheebs said, they have to be flexible to account for children being unwell too, so just phone them and let them know.
What's mildly upsetting me now is that wriggler will have just got over the disruption from the op and then next week it's the 2m jabs, which could set us back again [gloom]. Hey ho. I've managed to offload DS1 to MIL's tonight - DH is at tennis so it's never a good evening, especially with a klingon baby - and need to get some housecleaning done because it's DS1's birthday party this weekend; and although it's meant to be outside, we have predicted temps of 40deg, with possible storms, so it could all go horribly wrong!
Hello! Can I join? DD was born on 31/10/2012. Took me nearly 3 weeks before I venture out on my own other than the visits to the hospital and GP
Today can fuck the fuck off, in fact it can fuck off with yesterday as that was shite too.
Baby Loopy has suddenly turned into mega screamy baby but I have no idea why - he's fed, clean nappy, got infacol, doesn't want to be stimulated, doesn't want rocker, doesn't want playmat, won't sleep on or off me, I'm clueless
For those ladies with babies who's dropped a night feed, have you found your babies eat more or more often during the day? I have no idea why he's suddenly become so restless & upset & the only thing that's different is that he's dropped a night feed He's 5 wks, 3 days....
I'm also in mega pain with sciatica & so far the 2 private practitioners I've contacted cannot treat it due to holidays or whatever - wtf? Do people not want to earn any money anymore???
Comforting a baby when you can hardly walk is very difficult
Welcome fionaloo, excuse my moaning
Hi Fionaloo! It took me 3 weeks to get out too.
Is baby loopy just discovering his voice? Or seems distressed with the crying? Try shoving more food in?
Hi Pinpan & Loopyla,
How's baby loopy doing?? Hopefully much better than my wee one. Got weigh today and still not putting weight on. She will be 4 weeks old on Friday and she is still not at her birth weight yet. I am bf her exclusive. Perhaps I am miss interpreting her gripping pain cry as wind when she is in fact hungry??? Bad mother that's what I gather I am... Any suggestion??????
Welcome fionaloo sorry weight isn't up yet. I'm EBFing too and if DD whimpers she gets boob. Took me a while to do that as worried about over feeding her but apparently you can't with BFing babies. She won't take it if she doesn't want it. I also spent three days last week in bed feeding and sleeping, you could try that? In sure you're doing well. BFing is hard work!
DD has decided that the time to be wide awake and screaming is between 9pm and 2am. I'm knackered! How do I fix this? Anyone else having the same? Or do I just ride it out? <<exhausted emocion>>
Our amby nest arrived today...put T in it and he started dozing almost straight away! He wasn't even due a nap . So I'm currently enjoying a bath; bliss. Can hear him gurgling but he seems to be able to settle himself quite well. Be interesting to see what tonight brings.
Same as elvis here fiona, I feed feed feed at the slightest squeak & DS piling on the chub so can you trying feeding more often?
Elvislives2012, thanks for the tip, my dd regurgitate cottage cheese milk and sometime and sometimes milk that she has just taken hence worry about comfort feeding.
OMG!! Think DD is cluster feeding tonight started at 1630, gave her a bath, back on the breast 1730, 1840 and gave her a bottle of expressed breast milk, she went back on the breast again?!? How??? Why??
My womble is a spiller too Fionaloo - usually coz I've fed her on top of wind, rather than coz she's full up, so I just keep winding and then feeding again if she is still squawking. DH is better at getting the wind out (no chesty bumps to get in the way) but over the knee works quite well too. It's frustrating to see hard earned milk hit the floor but though it might look like lots, I am trying to remember that it isn't really. She does eventually stop eating so don't worry about comfort feeding.
says the mother who grumbled at baby this morning for eating too much Comfort sucking is a different problem!
I am bloody miserable at the moment and not sure why. Stupid hormones, exhaustion and a ridiculously needy, hungry baby. She still doesn't sleep more than 4 hours in a row while all the other babies in my various coffee groups are going 6 or more at reasonably predictable times, and I can't put her down during the day without her waking up, and nothing ever happens at the same time, she barely ever goes to sleep without a struggle (and/or the boob) even though I can tell when she should be sleeping, and she is so bloody hungry all the time. I don't want to wish away her first few months, but I'd also like to have more sleep and a couple of days in a row where I don't cry. Am I depressed, or is she just flippin' hard work?
Are u sure you are not describing my DD??? My DD is exactly like yours!
It's going to be a long night and my DH is working away, so it's me myself and DD. oh joy!!
I feel like u do... I keep telling myself it will be fine, just a phase...
finaloo argh I hate cluster feeding! How old is she? Could it be a growth spurt?
pinpan it's bloody hard having a new baby and all babies are different. My DD nowhere near sleeps through and has decided that the only time to sleep is between 2&5 in the morning. I'm knackered! I honestly believe that people who say their DCs were sleeping thru at 6 weeks, have really forgotten and are lying! How only is yours? 9weeks? I bet you're it doing anything wrong. I know what u mean though, if I could just get 6 hours sleep I'd feel so much better.
My DD is 4 weeks old... Sigh...
DS has decided sleep is for wimps.
He also makes so many noises. When he's sleeping quite often his breathing sounds like he's choking. HV says its fine but still scares me.
Bit worried too. Lochia had stopped except for a tiny but of brown discharge at day21 and started on the minipill for the first time. Started bleeding 3 days into taking it. Gp said that was normal on minipill. I wasn't feeling right on it so stopped it after a week. I'm still bleeding 6 days after stopping taking it. Anyone any experience of minipill?
Womble has been lovely this morning (ie asleep or smiling) so
i have forgiven her and myself a lot. I had a great time with my antenatal coffee group
even tho they all sleep more than me & am feeling better. It will not last forever, I will get sleep and some semblance of routine one day. Positive thoughts etc. Might look into getting a hammock.
We have no routine. Pip cluster feeds in the evening. I seem to have her attached to a boob constantly between about 5 and 10pm. I bath DD1 and read her stories while feeding pip.
I had hoped for a bit of daytime routine by now. Yesterday pip cluster fed for most of the morning with a series of short naps in my arms. Any time I tried to put her down she woke.
My only achievement yesterday was getting the rubbish and recycling out. I need to get the bathroom cleaned today. If I manage it without pip attached to me or crying, then it will be a successful day. DH has been away for 5 days now. Since we have all survived so far, I am telling myself that I can manage the next 5 days (and the 5 after that and repeat for 3 more weeks).
I totally understand where you are coming from. My DH has been away for 3 days now and it is tough.
All I can say I'd hang in there. You've doing great!
elvis wide awake from approx 9-2am has been the norm here too! DS has started taking larger bottles over the last 48hrs and that seems to have helped, but I don't expect this to last - I'm just trying to stay grateful for the good days but not be too hopeful that its any indication of a routine...
honey I have a noisy sleeper - lots of snorting and moaning and writhing and punching. Loopy (I think) mentioned once about baby palates being softer or something so they can make a sort of raspy/snoring noise?? Apologies if I've actually just made that up
A google about the mini-pill seems to suggest that it is common to have irregular bleeds as a result but I would ring your GP if it's worrying you because if you're like me you won't need any extra anxieties right now!
Sympathies running and fionaloo - I'm nearly a week into at least four weeks of DH away and I can only email 'urgent' stuff as his only way to communicate is through a group email address for half the world to read... Mum is incredibly helpful as she is more patient than him and requires a lot less sleep, but can't stop me feeling lonely.
and all round I think!
Thanks pheebs. Exactly right- I don't need anything else to worry about! Spoke to gp who said not to worry and chalks it up to the minipill prob not being right (or at least that brand not being right). And call back/see him if bleeding not stopped by next week.
Interesting about the noisy breathing had soft palate. That sounds right for the kinds of noises he's making!
Sympayjyes for all with DH/DPs away. I struggle when DH is on a late shift and not home till 11pm- don't know what I'd do if he was away!
<<feeling smug that managed to have a shower>>
Half an hour later....
<<brushes regurgitated milk out of hair>>
It's glamorous being a mum!
DH is nightshift to tonight so of course minisooty who has been sleeping very well is scuffling about in her sleep freaking me out. I'm crap at night, need sleep to function! Why o why won't she just sleep peacefully?!?
I read yesterday that the fidgetting and squeaking noises in there sleep is there way of moving between sleep types light to REM and so on, although when its late and you want to sleep its still not very easy to listen to...
Another week, another new symptom to battle with. DD is 4 week old, and still not at birth weight, got referred to the paedetrician, was diagnose with reflux. When DD cries, she sounds like she is such pain, breaks my heart! DH is not here and with her crying I am just about hanging in there.
Does anyone knows how long before we se improvement after taking infant gaviscon and ranitidine?? Just want the pain to go away...
Sorry for the rant, just getting seriously exhausted now... Help!!!
Fionaloo I am currently holding pip upright after feeding her to try to reduce reflux pain and vomit. The Gaviscon should start working straight away since it is acting like a raft on top of the milk in the stomach. I think ranitidine can take up to 2 weeks to make a difference. Pip started on it last Monday and there has been some improvement but I am hoping for more. I read that it is better to give the meds at different times since Gaviscon can reduce the absorption of ranitidine. Also the effective dose of ranitidine is very weight dependent so as your DC puts on weight the dose needs to be increased.
Pip has her 8 week jabs today. When DD1 had hers she screamed afterwards all the way home, was fine the first night and awful the next night. I have a fresh bottle of calpol ready for pip.
Thanks for the information on gaviscon and ranitidine. DD is now suffering from constipation and gp has advise to reduce dosage.
DD is also going through cluster feeding, her cries are getting more sharp compare to normal. Sometimes I don't know whether she is crying in pain or hungry. Past few times I though she is in pain becos of her cry, turn our she is hungry even though I just fed her 1/2 hour a go. Major failure as a mum... Sigh...
Poor Pip, hope its not too bad for both & hopefully she settles.. Finger cross!! X
You are not a failure! With DD1 I often had trouble working out what she was crying about. DD2 is easier - I don't try to work it out. Any cries I start off with getting a boob out. If that doesn't work I flop her over my shoulder to see if it's wind or wanting attention. Finally, if she is still crying, I put her down and see if she seems to just want some peace and quiet (not always easy when DD1 is home).
Pip's jabs were ok yesterday. She was asleep until the first jab so a rather rude awakening. The tears didn't even last a minute and then she went back to sleep.
DD1 has her school nativity play today. There are 90 children in her year so I am expecting amusing chaos. DD has 3 sentences. She knows them well and is now making up alternative versions. I really hope she says the correct words. I will be sooo embarrassed if she uses her current favourite which includes "Jesus is doing a poo" instead of "Jesus is a king".
Your DD sound really cute and adorable. How did the nativity play go?
Does anyone know whether you are suppose to feed an acid reflux child who is going through cluster feeding or not?? I was told it only gives shirt term comfort and by feeding them I am causing pain. Is that true or right???
If I stop feeding DD, she cries like she is in pain as well if I dun feed her. I am so lost!!! Help!!
The nativity play went well. DD1 said her correct lines. All the children looked really cute.
Pip has surprised me this evening. She has fallen asleep already. She has not had her last dose of ranitidine for the day. She is also still in the clothes she has been wearing all day but it seems mean to wake her and change her. So I have put her in her moses basket and I will do her medicine and change her when she next wakes. I dont know if she is tired due to yesterday's jabs or if she has caught DD1's cold (I know I have).
I think every DC's reflux is different. Pip cluster feeds and does not seem to get pain from it. I feel like I am constantly experimenting with my kids, trying different routines, medicines, sleeping positions etc to find out what works. And just as I think something has worked there will be a growth spurt or illness and it will all change again.
It's been very quiet on here recently....
Nativity sounds fun running. Before I know it my LO will be doing one too
Getting lots of booby pain. The lactation consultant said it could be raynards syndrome as its particularly bad when I'm cold that and cracked nipples is not fun! Good job I'm so bloody minded otherwise I've no idea if I'd still be BFing
Hope you're all ok, how is the sleeping going? DD did a four hour block last night! Can't believe it!
Elvis the boob pain sounds awful. If it is Reynauds can anything be done to help?
Pip has got a cold. Poor thing is really snuffly and has been sick on me 3 times so far today. I think she is being sick because of mucus going into her stomach. I have given her some Calpol because she was crying the way she does when she is in pain. She is sleeping a lot in my arms today. I had hoped to get loads of cleaning and tidying done today. None of it has happened but it doesn't matter really. I hope pip gets over this bug soon.
Hope every one is ok.
Sorry to hear that Pips got the cold. Hope u r bearing up well.
We r thinking of u. X
Running I just woke minisooty by snorting with laughter at Jesus did a poo!! That is hilarious!
Hope everyone is doing ok. It's very quiet just now.
I was at the chiropractor today, he is working on my poor childbirth busted hip. But he also snapped my back and neck a few times. Fab relief but bit of a sore head now!
Somebody save me from windy babies who fall asleep feeding at 2 am but won't stay asleep if you want to lay them flat.
pinpan we're having similar issues. Which end is your LO suffering with wind. DS seems to get a lot of lower stomach pain which makes him screech until he manages to fart!
I have a windy baby too, no matter how much we try to burp her she just won't give it up!
Minisooty very grumpy and scrunched up today, means shes due a dirty nappy! Hopefully she does it when I'm asleep and DH is on duty with her! lol
Mind you they are both asleep beside me just now and with them and Rod Stewart on TV singing christmas songs I'm ever so slightly emotional!!
Pip has been less windy since I have gone dairy free. i decided to try cutting out dairy because DD1 was intolerant. It is a real pain though. I love pasta with creamy sauce and chocolates. I also want the option of giving formula. I am seeing the gp tomorrow to ask about hypoallergenic formula.
Top end! Horrendous. The GP says I have to put cheese on everything and fatten up so I can't really try cutting out dairy.
I have an embarrassing question (better on here than Facebook!)
Is everyone having sex again?
Minisooty is 9 weeks now. DH and I have had sex twice since she was born. He is really desperate to have more sex but I am so tired all the time and my body is hideous and fat, I just don't feel sexy!
Tell me I'm not a bad wife????
We are having sex once or twice a week and have been since 3 weeks (now nearly 7 weeks). But both me as DH are very suprised by that. Definitely in no way a bad wife for not wanting to. We're only back at it because I feel up to it - if I'm feeling rough or fat DH backs off!
Wow honey we weren't even at it that much when TTC! Good on you!
My DD is 9 weeks too and we have attempted sex twice unsuccessfully and the rest of the time that dh has been aiming in that kinda direction I've kinda found excuses which led to a very 'interesting'chat one night in bed.
You would have thought after CS that the physical aspect wouldn't have been affected but in my case it feels like it has unless It is just the hormonal effect?!
My other issue is given i'm breastfeeding would I be ok without the bra and breast pads I currently live in?
Fair play Honey
DD is 7 weeks old and haven't even attempted it! Was sore fromCS and now the boobs are constantly sore. Just don't feel sexy. Added to that is the fact DH is now in the spate room I wonder whether we will ever DTD again
11 and a half weeks here and have only just ventured that way again. DH has been very patient!
Wow honey, well done you! Not sure how you find the time!!!
My head sometimes feels like it but I'm just not confident in how I look anymore. Hopefully once my busted hip is fixed I can get back to the gym and feel better
Yoo-hoo! Anyone still here?
I'm still here staying at my parents tonight. Feel a bit of a failure!
DH is nightshift and I have a horrible nauseating migrane so have decamped down the road for some help with minisooty. Feel like I should be able to cope but minisooty is very grumpy, 10 week growth spurt? And I was struggling to hold it all together so DH made me come stay
I'm still here
and bloody knackered! weesooty could be a growth spurt. Don't listen to me tho, slightest sign of cluster feeding and I immediately say its a growth spurt!
Out for lunch later, I am going to stuff my face --then moan about not losing any weight--
Also, you shouldn't feel like a failure! It's much better to be open and honest if you're struggling but sometimes that's the hardest option IYSWIM
Too right elvis - I'll stick my hand up and say most if the last 12 weeks have been a struggle! It's only this week that all of a sudden we've started getting 8 hours sleep in a row (except of course I still wake up 3 times) and it's a bit more fun in between the struggles. Hope that growth spurt is over now weesooty!
8 hours sleep? In a row? What's that like? Did you get an upgrade to one with a mute button?
Most sleep in a row I can get is 6hrs, 8hrs sounds like a luxury. I find an evening cluster feed does wonders for a long first bit of sleep.
Getting some help while you feel ill sounds a good plan, glad you got someone so near who can help.
Thanks everyone. I'm feeling slightly better after a decent sleep although still have an echo of a headache im glad i asked for help. thankfully this is DHs last night shift and he's off tomorrow.
elvis how was lunch? I love being a lady who lunches!
It does help to know others struggle as well. Night is my worst time. During the day I can cope with anything, crying, sick, poo explosions.... But after about 10pm I don't know why but I start to struggle! DH going away in January for 3 weeks I'm really dreading it!
Passing round the chocolate santas, diets can wait till January!
I still don't know what 8 hours in a row feels like because I wake up every 3! But it's nice not to have to get up every time.
Put my parents on the plane this morning, cried all the way home. Can't wait til Friday, DH has next week off and them his mum arrives (lovely MIL thank goodness).
Pinpan sorry your family away. I know the feeling and it sucks. At least you have lovely mil coming soon.
Minisooty is fast asleep but I am wide awake so annoying. Have been doing online shopping from my phone, not a good idea, spending too much money!
Ah lunch was awesome thanks. And bought for me-wo hoo!
pinpan <hugs> where do they live?
Tried bringing bedtime forward last night but only succeeded in inducing a massive cluster feed. Feel because I do it in our bedroom and keep the lights low, which means my evenings are spent in there. I miss my DH, especially as he's now in the spare room
Is it worth allowing the cluster feed to take place in the lounge. My DD's cluster feeding seems to coincide with dinner or pudding time and then when she has finished inevitably fallen asleep she goes in bath then bed. I found if I fed her after bath she didn't sleep for as long.
Well, DS slept 3 and a half hours and showed no signs of stirring so instead of thanking god and going back to sleep for a bit I started worrying so woke him up. I am so stupid.
Thanks elvis. They're in Northumberland. Spoke to them as they passed through Singapore airport, which was fun! Will see them next in August, womble will be huge by then.
Cakes, I do all my evening feeds in the lounge watching tv. I'll stop when she gets predictable enough that there's one short feed and then bed, but don't see the point of hiding away while she's still cluster feeding/generally being a pain. Tonight she is just refusing to go to sleep, sigh.
Doh, HoneyMum! Must confess that I have to go and listen for breathing if I wake in the night and can't hear the womble, but I try not to touch.
Hello every one. Sorry I have not posted recently. I have had a rotten cold, so has pip and DD1. We are all slowly getting better.
DH will be home on Friday. The last 4 weeks have gone both slowly and fast IYSWIM. DD1 has missed him much more this time than all the other times he has been away. Next year will be hard because he will be away for months, but not until March. So we have the next 2 months all together.
I have to get my arse in gear and book some flights to Oz. I am going to take my DDs to stay with my mum for a month over March / April. It will be good to have the company and help.
8 hours of sleep!!! What is that? I thought I was doing well getting 5 hours occasionally. I suppose I have low expectations because DD1 was such an awful sleeper.
Womble's long sleeps happened all of a sudden so keep your hopes up! She went from 5 to 8 hours just like that. Hoping it will return after this growth spurt. Got weighed today and she's on the 91st percentile! 13 lb 14 oz - only a couple of pounds off doubling her birth weight and not 3 months old til Sunday. No wonder I'm knackered!
Hope everyone has a lovely Christmas Day!
Merry Christmas all! I am the only person awake in my house. Can't believe DD1 is still asleep. There is a pile of presents at the end of her bed. I am almost tempted to go and wake her.
Merry Christmas ladies! I thought everyone had banished
Oh I lost you all! Merry Christmas and A Happy New Year to you all, even though it's horribly late!
How is everyone doing - how are the sleeping/feeding patterns going?
DS2 is huge - he doubled his birthweight by 9wo, when he had his first jabs (I was a touch late) and must be another lb heavier by now! He's a chunky baby, love him!
I've just done a comparison photo of him and DS1 pulling almost the same face with Daddy on my profile - can't believe the difference in age though!
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year Thumbwitch Are you on facebook?
Sleeping at night is quite good here naps during day are basically non existant. DD is 13wks old. Wow on weight gain, I can't wait for our LOs to be more mobile and get kinda toned iykwim. DD was double her weight at about 11wks and just starting to outgrow her 0-3mth clothes.
Will have a look at pic
Loving the pics on your profile
I've just read back a way and seen the question about sex/badwifeness - so I will make any/all of you feel better because after DS1 I didn't let DH near me for nearly a year. I thought it was 7m, he says it was nearer 11 and I guess he'd know better, he was the one waiting for it!
This time around he says he's resigned himself to never having sex again but I know he's joking - neither of us have great libidos, to be fair, so he'll wait until I give him the green light (whenever that might be) and then we'll probably get into a regular pattern (but knowing us it might only be once or twice a month).
I don't know what I'd do if I had a highly-sexed DH, I have absolutely zero interest. Can't even bring myself to entertain myself, iyswim
I still can't get my dh to fully understand that I have zero interest...
Our poor husbands! There's a 21 year old girl in my antenatal coffee group who claims to have been back to 2 or 3 times a week after three weeks. The rest of us just laughed hollowly.
DH is going to have to wait a while longer too. I had my gall bladder removed yesterday and feel like I have had another c-section only higher up.
ah no. Hope you feel better soon. Had you been ill with it or was it unexpected?
My gall bladder became infected when I was 8 weeks pregnant last year. Bit scary cos at first the docs thought I had an ectopic pg. A scan showed I little gallstones (charmingly called sludge) so the docs wanted to remove it but needed to wait until after pip was born.
I feel better today than yesterday but it is really frustrating not being able to pick anything up. I feel mostly useless
I'm guessing by your c-section comment you had one of those too. You'll get there just as you did after having pip, just give it time and make the best of the forced rest whilst you have the chance. How is pip?
Both my DDs were c-sections. DD1 was emcs so I had a much nicer planed elcs for pip. You are right about the forced rest. It is helping. Even having a general anaesthetic felt like a good opportunity for a couple of hours of uninterrupted sleep!
Pip is doing ok. She is now on prescription formula (Nutramigen) which has helped to stop her being so sick. She still has some reflux. DH has been great looking after pip and playing with DD1 in the snow.
Is your DD doing better with daytime naps now?
Glad pip is doing better on the different formula. DD still doesn't really nap during day unless its on me or if we go out. I have discovered she will sleep slightly longer if when she first stirs I don't acknowledge her then she goes back to sleep for a bit longer. It may also be cause I don't put her to bed as such for a nap so my aim next week is if she appears tired is to actually try putting her in nursery for a nap and see if that will help.She's also nearly too big for her moses basket so will be putting basket in cot to get her used to cot soon. How old is pip now?
Pip is 15 weeks. She is too big for her Moses basket. I think we will move her in about a week when I am more mobile. We have had some success with naps but it is variable.
Hi all haven't been here for ages! Hope you're all ok? DD is now 14 weeks and so much more alert
too alert at night though just waiting for her to start rolling over. She's so massive she's now in a cot.
Lol at the no sec for a year- you've made me feel better! The discomfort in my boobs has only just give and couldn't even contemplate it before now (not that I can contemplate it yet, tho!)
Hi Elvis. Sadly I think this thread has gone to sleep. Good to hear that things are mostly going well for you. Hope the night activity ends soon.
Pip is now 16 weeks. She seemed to be really close to rolling over last week but last Thursday we found out that she has hip dysplasia. She has to wear a harness that keeps her legs bent in a frog position 24 hours a day until her hip joint stays in place. So no rolling over can happen here for the next few months. At least I can be reasonably confident that I can put pip down, leave the room and she won't have rolled, wriggled or crawled any where. Apart from this she is doing well, loads of smiles and cute 'talking'.
Womble is 18 weeks now, and celebrated by getting me up 8 times last night. Gruesome.
Sorry to hear about the hips Running. The smiles and talking are great though, aren't they?
Sorry to hear about hips. I really enjoy listening to the chatting have realised today I get more if I respond with similar noises rather than normal speech. I check back sometimes but not as much as I used to.
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