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FEB 2010 Two and a half to three...the "contrary age" (no it isn't! yes it is!)

(989 Posts)

Come in, sit down, fresh coffee is brewing, Prosecco's in the fridge for later and there's a bumper box of Lindt chocolates for all....

ScienceRocks Wed 26-Sep-12 15:26:19

Thanks IC!

Love the new thread title. DD2 is spending a lot of time saying: "I don't want a sandwich/drink/kiss/anything else that she is being offered or asked to do," then promptly doing whatever she has protested to. Glad it's not just her!

Climbingpenguin Wed 26-Sep-12 15:27:56

Thanks IC

<pretends to be hard at work while DCs are in nursery>

No, BC, DH turned down the job in the end. At some point it will be readvertised at a higher salary and he'll apply again but he's doubtful as he expects the calibre of the field to be much higher.

That's annoying about the lurgy, that's my fear. DS was pretty bad last night so I think that's three of us coming down with something.

IC maybe once it's colder with the sling? If not at that size it might not be long until the connecta can come in.

Climbingpenguin Wed 26-Sep-12 15:30:27

and yes the evening fussy lasts longer than you remember doesn't it. <passes some more cake around>

Bearcrumble Wed 26-Sep-12 21:37:28

I have that double pushchair, IC - I love it except that it's slightly too wide to get through my front door so if I have sleeping children I don't want to wake I have to lift it and pop one wheel off to get it through and it's a faff.

Do you have a head-hugger insert for the newborn side? It's a good idea.

With regard to the thread title - DS asks me what something is and after I tell him he says "no it's not". Today he was telling me it wasn't raining when it was tipping down so I said maybe he needed glasses if he couldn't see it. That made him run around demanding 'MY GLASSES'. In the end I found an old pair of sunglasses which satisfied him, but it had the potential to turn ugly wink.

SurvivalOfTheUnfittest Wed 26-Sep-12 21:44:18

Grrr! Just lost massive post! That'll teach me! Thanks for the new thread IC.
Hello to all of you. Can't face writing it all again, except to say that I found DS2 sitting unaided on the toilet this evening having a poo, wiping his bottom with half a loo roll (that I then had to fish out of the toilet), still not actually finding the right area, and then proceeding to roll on my cream carpet with his bare bottom before I could sort out the loo roll explosion!! hmm

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Thu 27-Sep-12 04:56:52


NK2b1f2 Thu 27-Sep-12 21:29:16

Mous <waves back> grin

stoofadoof Thu 27-Sep-12 21:30:03

I'm coming back at the weekend when I hope the stinky cold I've got will have gone, and somehow magically I'll feel full of vim and vigour and not be a twineyarse (i apologise if that requires translating from cumbrian ;-) )

hope everyone's ok smile

Welcome back stoof!
Get well soon x

Bc it won't go through our front door either - my plan is to wheel them into the back garden via the side gate then leave 'em parked outside until they wake up... (the joys of semi-detached houses!!)
Good tip about the head-hugger, I'll get onto that....
Arf at the glasses kerfuffle!

NK2b1f2 Fri 28-Sep-12 13:59:44

Reverse psychology working a treat today. Told dd2 who looked totally shattered after a busy week that I wanted her to have a bit of a lie down. Not to sleep but just to have a rest... She was snoring a minute later grin. She hasn't had a lunchtime sleep for months but every so often I manage to trick her when I feel she really needs it.
Waving at everyone...

StoneBaby Fri 28-Sep-12 18:44:56

Marking my place. I'll be back later

<go and load another washing machine>

AbsB Sat 29-Sep-12 11:08:31

Also making my place... <Waves and passes round some croissant and coffee> We are in a 'big girl' bed now which so far has been a success. The first night was a disaster with DD getting up, turning on the light (I tied a ribbon to the bathroom light so she can turn it on and off now), pretending to sit on the potty in her pyjamas and getting back into bed about twenty times before 9pm. The novelty finally wore off and she's now sleeping through... And seems to love it. She now has a bed guard after falling out the first night. We are learning! <Right time to pay attention to DP who is back from tour...>

rainbowweaver Sat 29-Sep-12 13:07:14

Loving the sunny day today, washing line now full. smile sb have also been washing since Friday. What is it about men and children and clothes?

StoneBaby Sat 29-Sep-12 19:41:08

Hi AbsB and rainbow how are you?

DS can now say 'cuddle' when he gives one or want one. My problem is that he knows when to use it ie when I'm cross against him, he runs to give me a hug and with a sweet voice says 'cuddle'. It melts my heart everytime and I bet he knows it grin

Well, we're settle back into our routine after 7 days of late nights for DS (he was going to bed between 7 and 9pm most nights due to family commitments). He's now so pleased to go to his bed.

rainbow I'm on wash number 5 since yesterday afternoon and I probably still have 2 more to do - this includes bedding, whool and white.

IC I hope your last 2 weeks of recovery goes quick. Are you allowed to drive?

survival DS is starting to be independant with toilet use and want to wipe his bottom too but at the moment I've manged to stop him doing this confused

NK2b1f2 Sun 30-Sep-12 07:20:56

Now when did I start considering 6.30 a lie- in??? confused

Bearcrumble Sun 30-Sep-12 22:05:20

Oh GOD, same here! DS was so consistent waking around 7 but now.... he wakes up at 6ish (and shouts out in the night for a wee/cuddly toys that have slipped out of bed).

We had a lovely weekend away on the Kent coast - stayed in Minnis Bay and visited Botany Bay and Whitstable.

NK2b1f2 Mon 01-Oct-12 11:15:56

Bear - our mornings have gone pear shaped since I went back to work. On work days I have to be up at 6 and the bathroom is between their rooms, so going for a shower wakes them both up. Now I can't convince them to sleep longer on the days I am off. On Saturday morning dd2 decided it was time to get up at 5.30... I drew the line at that and sent her back to bed! She was furious but did actually go back to sleep.

NK2b1f2 Mon 01-Oct-12 13:35:11

dd2 just did a really clever thing and started snoring on my lap with her eyes still open... But no, she was not tired and really didn't want a nap grin (Have now transferred her to her cot).

NK2b1f2 Mon 01-Oct-12 20:18:27

Those of you who had/have SPD, has it settled since you had your dc or is it flaring up still? Reason I am asking is that I seem to have started having problems again since starting work. I am guessing a long commute plus driving for my job, doing 2ish hour interviews hovering on the edge of a sofa with a laptop balanced on my knees, plus having put away the pushchair and walking everywhere at dd2's speed is not helping. I now find myself quite achy after fairly short (slow- looking at every slug, snail, dog poo, stone) walks and I can't bear to sleep on my back. sad

rainbowweaver Mon 01-Oct-12 20:39:46

nk I do feel a little achy after my once a week lunch-time jog, but it fades after an hour or so. It is a little odd, isn't it? Wonder when things will go back to normal?

rainbowweaver Mon 01-Oct-12 20:44:19

Shockingly DD and I woke up at 10am this morning. Luckily no meetings this morning so was able to get in after a very quick brush etc by 10.30am. Can't believe it, have never overslept to this extent! She had a 5.30am wake up, had some milk, and we went back to sleep. Me thinking that we'd be awake again by 8 at the latest. Next time I will have to set the alarm clock. That'll teach me.

NK2b1f2 Mon 01-Oct-12 20:47:32

10am shockgrin Ahhh, I can vaguely remember what that was like... (long before children). My alarm will go off at 6.01 tomorrow morning sad (6.01 for psychological reasons because it sounds later than 6 or god forbid 5.59 grin)

stoofadoof Mon 01-Oct-12 21:02:24

am still a miserable cold twineyarse… i'll be back smile

Bearcrumble Tue 02-Oct-12 09:23:04

DS did 7pm - 7.30am last night!! At last a proper waking time. So happy.

StoneBaby Tue 02-Oct-12 11:44:28

Great news bc I can't comment as DS is happy to entertain himself while in bed until 7am ish at weekends (he takes plastic toys with him to bed every night).

We're in trouble now as he can now climb out of his cot! He pull the chair which is in his room against the cot and uses it as a step when he's on the top of the railing. I'm now looking for a 2nd bed guard (his bed won't fit against the wall.

rainbowweaver Tue 02-Oct-12 22:29:28

nk what about showering at night instead of morning? I've recently changed to that. Works!

StoneBaby Wed 03-Oct-12 09:19:03

Booo I feel nauseous and it's not fun. Even gaviscon is not helping. Sorry just needed to share!

SconesForTea Wed 03-Oct-12 11:07:20

Oh SB it couldn't be good news could it....? wink

Thanks for the new thread IC <grabs a coffee and a couple of chocolates> <greedy> DD1 is SO contrary it makes me laugh. "Look, DD1, it's raining" "No it's not raining Mummy" <rain lashes every window in the house> "It is sunny" confused

CP how are the DCs settling in at nursery? And how is the new house now?

How are you feeling stoof?

Great to hear from you Abs. <wonders if I am the only cruel mother in the world who puts a stairgate on DD1's door so that she can't get out of her room at night>

rainbow shock shock at 10am wake-up!!! Also shock to you getting wherever you had to be by 10.30. Wow. Even leaving the house before 11am is beyond me.

Bc great on the DS sleep-through. DD1 tends to wake at 7ish, I feel very short-changed indeed if she wakes before 7 on a weekend (on weekdays DH takes her). She did wake at 6.10 last weekend on my day (we take it in turns at the weekend), and I told her in no uncertain terms that is was still nighttime and to go back to sleep. She did! Until half 7. Hurrah.

NK sorry no advice on the SPD, didn't have it. Sympathies. Should you see a doctor perhaps? Seeing as pg was over 2.5 years ago... sad for you at 6am alarm. But are you enjoying working, is it worth it?

<waves to Mous, SR, survival> How are?

DD1 has been pooing in her knickers more and more but yesterday did a potty-poo. Cue much praise and the first chocolate she's had in ages. I think it was an accident, she was expecting a wee, but we shall see.

She is still crying and clingy when going to nursery - she has been going since she turned 2 in February. It makes me very sad. She only goes for two 2.5hr afternoon sessions a week but I do treasure those times. I would like to make it 3hr sessions actually but she seems so needy and fragile. I don't know if she really is, or if she puts it on for me. She has become even more clingy the past few weeks and now says she only loves mummy (not daddy, grandma etc). Oh and her cuddly bunny.

It was DH and my wedding anniversary yesterday, we have been married two years shock smile It has gone so quickly. We are having a night in a hotel this weekend, I just can't wait. My first night away from DD2. She won't take a bottle any more after being reluctant for some time, but drinks from a cup very well so I'm going to ask Mum to give her cow's milk from a beaker even though she is just 11m. Evil or sensible?

StoneBaby Wed 03-Oct-12 11:58:29

scones it's too early to test yet sad but I have thought about it grin. I would give her some milk or if you're really worried buy one of those ready made follow on milk. Can't believe it's already 2 years you got married, I remember you telling us the wedding organisation.

I'm thinking of a gate on DS doir too if needed so don't worry.

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Wed 03-Oct-12 14:54:33

SB FX! that would be a good reason for being nauseous not like the strept throat we had last week.

All better now but DH had a giant hives outbreak this week end and is on a lot of tests and a strict diet <yoohooo more fun for me>

I know friends who "lock" their children form 7 to 7 in their bedroom or (8/8, 9/9 if french). The children knows not to open the doors before their parents allow it.
I would be wary of a stairgate BTH. DD2 can most probably rip it off, she can definitely climb over it.
<she ripped the toilet roll holder from the bathroom wall, it was very firmly attached too>

oops sorry I have to go again hoping to answer you individually soon

Ooh SB sounds promising! smile

Good news on the sleeping Bc. What a relief!

A lie-in until 1000 rainbow shock

DS is getting more alert and wakeful, which means more juggling of his and DD's needs for me. The evening fussy is still going full tilt - a particularly epic one last night (although he's asleep tonight after a few attempts, so FX....) <bats off MN jinx>, but at least he only woke twice overnight afterwards (although both required a nappy change, the second one involved much pooing and wiping and comedy arc of pee when I wasn't directing his willy towards the nappy...lots of fun at 05.15..!)

DD is now much more interested in DS and often wants to cuddle or stroke him, which is very sweet, but means she's also tending to wake him up during naps, which is a pain. Her habit of yelling when she wants something and I don't immediately comply is also waking him up, so I'm becoming much crosser with her more often now - hardly surprising, especially given the less than optimum sleep (although it's still a reasonable amount - I managed a one hour siesta today and yesterday..!).

Interestingly, DD's gradually becoming better behaved for me and more affectionate (not that she wasn't before) which makes me wonder if losing patience with her a few times a day is actually improving her behaviour in some respects. I always feel rotten after getting cross, though. It still feels like a failure. I try and give her plenty of positive attention where possible so she realises that the negative attention is not actually more desirable than no attention at all....

Early days, but the challenges of having two LOs are certainly making themselves felt!

Meanwhile, I've got another course of antibiotics because my wound, despite mostly healing well, now has a small localised abscess. Meh.

Apart from that, I'm fine and generally pretty cheerful! Although DS is less chilled than he was, he's still super easy compared to his big sister....

StoneBaby Thu 04-Oct-12 08:50:28

Oh IC sad about your infection issue

Just wondering if anybody suffered early pg symptoms more than a week AF was due? I still have morning nausea but can't test before next Tuesday!

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Thu 04-Oct-12 10:18:01

SB I had symptoms with DD2 a week after "making" her, I had to wait 2 weeks before testing, I knew it would be positive though wink.

IC <booh>

StoneBaby Thu 04-Oct-12 17:31:42

I'm in the exact same format mous It'll teach me patience hmm

ScienceRocks Fri 05-Oct-12 19:09:13

Good luck sb smile

Bearcrumble Fri 05-Oct-12 21:19:18

What about one of those super-sensitive tests? I know they aren't 100% this early but sometimes you can get a positive - Clearblue digital says you can test 4 days before period is due (though it doesn't guarantee results). I do hope it is good news.

DS's sleep has been a lot better the past few days but DD will only sleep on me so I am a bit scatty through not getting enough sleep. Also I find when I don't have a good night's sleep and the whole day is taken up with childcare I NEED to have an evening to myself - so mostly can't get to sleep before 11 as I have to have a bit of me time even if it comes out of the time when I ought to be sleeping. DD is asleep now but I so look forward to a bit of time with the laptop or tv or kindle.

I know what you mean, IC and have exactly the same issue with DS waking DD through yelling for things - they just can't remember to keep quiet at this age but it is awful. One time a few weeks ago I'd just got her off and he started loudly asking for something and I really lost it. I felt terrible afterwards. I shouted at him today as well - I'd given him a glass of water and instead of drinking it he was taking mouthfuls and then spitting/spraying them over the kitchen floor. I yelled and yelled about how disgusting it was and shoved some kitchen roll at him and told him to wipe it up then I left the room because I couldn't calm down without getting away from the situation. When I came back he was cleaning the floor with the kitchen roll (and crying). Even though he did clean it up I don't think the way I reacted was the right way - I have a thing about dribble/spit that really riles me but it's no excuse. He went on to have a couple more crying/screaming fits over minor things this afternoon and we never really got back on the right foot after it happened.

I'm sorry about your wound issues and I hope it is sorted soon.

Mous Sorry about your DH's allergy.

I haven't taken the sides off DS's cotbed actually - I think we should. He slept in the lower of some bunk beds on our weekend away and didn't wander.

He loves nursery and he adores his keyworker. I'm going in in a couple of weeks to do a cooking session with the kids. Wish me luck.

Bearcrumble Fri 05-Oct-12 21:21:18

Oh and I want to say something good because today was a bit rubbish - we went on a two hour walk just me and DS yesterday - up the hill and through Sydenham Hill woods and home again, he loved it and I let him dawdle as much as wanted and jump in muddy puddles and he was so affectionate and happy, it was brilliant.

NK2b1f2 Fri 05-Oct-12 21:46:10

SB I tested a week early with dd2 and got a faint line that disappeared again! So exciting! Repeated the test a few days later (still about 4 days early) and it was very much positive. Good luck!!

SR How are you doing? All calm on the home front?

BC That walk sounds lovely! smile And I know so well how you feel. dd2 was a very light sleeper until quite recently (she would shout 'Too noisy!! when she started talking, before she would just howl with tiredness) if dd1 kept her up in the evening. It used to drive me mad that dd1 kept chatting and running down the landing and singing and talking to her imaginary friend, and all I wanted was for her to shut up for five minutes so that dd1 could go off to sleep... It's settled now with dd2 being so tired after nursery that she is asleep as soon as her head hits the pillow.

IC All going well with juggling two? I'm in awe of your coping skills and level headedness. Moving house, cs, new baby and your dh's new job is quite a lot to deal with in one go.

mous Wishing you good health!! How is your dd2 doing at pre-school? Still happy? I am not too happy with dd2's current nursery to be honest but for the sake of three months I don't think it makes sense to move her. As soon as she is three she can go to the nursery class of dd1's school, which is fantastic.

rainbow I guess I could have a shower in the evening but I really need it in the morning to wake up... blush so purely selfish.

stoof How are things? <concerned> Hope your two are fully on the mend now with no lasting problems. Thought of you the other day when dh and I indulged in our fantasy to move up to the Lake District... I think the dream is somewhat different to the reality though so it won't happen sad

CP How are you settling into your new house? Hope all is well smile

SurvivalOfTheUnfittest Fri 05-Oct-12 21:54:05

IC and BC your comments about dealing with two on less than perfect sleep sound very familiar. I remember reading that most of you didn't shout at your DC and feeling awful. I still shout now more than I want to and its particularly bad at the moment as our sleep is still rubbish. This morning, the DC nearly reduced me to tears (for only the second time ever) and I had to rescue the situation in order to send DS1 to school in a reasonable mood. I can't be a perfect parent and have to accept that striving to be perfect makes me good enough (and DH seems to think I do a better job than I realise). When living on 3-5 hours' sleep (afer 4.5 years of it), good enough is just that.

This afternoon, I actually proved my worth by taking a urine sample to the GP for DS2. I'd subconsciously realised with my sensitive post-pregnancy nose that DS2's night nappies were suddenly smelling different to those of DS1. Afer a slightly smelly pair of wet pants this a.m, I decided to act and, despite the scepticism of both DH and the medical staff, my mother's intuition proved to be right - he has an infection. No other symptoms at all. He's had one dose of antibiotics - his first ever - and went to bed feeling sick. I fear that he is likely to react badly to them, given his tendancy for feeling/being sick, and DH is out on the lash tonight for the first time in months. I'm really hoping that neither of them spend the night vomiting!! hmm Sorry for me, me, me...

SB I'm sending you lots of very positive thoughts. Hoping that the nausea is a good sign...

NK I still have problems with SPD/PGP. I saw the physio for months, did my exercises for over a year and it is better than it was but I fear I may never be the same. I am just about coping with some dynamic exercise classes in the gym but fear that my attempts at playing badminton are probably over. Pilates type exercises are probably the way to go. I find driving hard too. I think part of my problem is because my joints are hyper mobile - could this be relevant to you too?

I'm going to go to bed now in the hope of getting some sleep. (DH woke me up at 12:30a.m. last night getting dressed for work 6 hours' early in his sleep! You can imagine how impressed I was!)

Stoof hope the cold is improving. I've got the first of this academic year and I'm more grumpy than usual!!

Lastly, I had a moan at DH the other night (sense a theme developing here? hmm blush) about the fact that my career has effectively been ended by having children and doing the lion's share of childcare. He has randomly now spoken to his boss about reducing his hours so I can do more (without discussing with me first!!) Not sure if he is calling my bluff and I've no idea whether this is what I want (or even an option in my organisation at the moment where it is all about cuts). How do I work that one out? I kind of feel I've done the hard part by having both of them at home for the last two years!

NK2b1f2 Fri 05-Oct-12 22:44:33

survival Just laughed out loud about your dh getting dressed for work in his sleep... grin Sorry though your sleep is still disrupted. We also have broken nights but due to dd1 going through some sort of developmental spurt and simply having to ask random questions at 3 in the morning hmm. Oh, and dd2 now likes to get up at 5 (not that we let her but it takes some convincing that it is still sleep time! Then, knowing my alarm goes off at 6, I totally fail to go back to sleep... A week of being up at 5 is starting to take its toll)

Climbingpenguin Sat 06-Oct-12 06:49:34

i'm back from holiday, got up 6 mountains over three days. DCs are shattered but still got up at 5.

will read through later smile

Climbingpenguin Sat 06-Oct-12 06:52:45

I do get shouty, nearly always when ds is crying and I'm trying to do something like go out.

Climbingpenguin Sat 06-Oct-12 06:57:45

oh DD slept through once last week, we normally get 50%.

StoneBaby Sat 06-Oct-12 07:51:38

I think the nausea was either a bug or in my head as itappears I may have nessed up my dates. I'll still will be testing during the week but not counting my chickens.

I from time to time shout at DS when he really plays up. Yesterday I played the bad mum as DS bited another child at nursery (3rd one this week) so I took away his favourite toys and told him he had to behave nicely with others children. Fx if'll work

Very me post, I'll be back later to comment

rainbowweaver Sat 06-Oct-12 10:48:30

I find if I get shouty at DD,but afterwards when calmed down I apologise and explain why, that helps rebuild bridges.

rainbowweaver Sat 06-Oct-12 10:49:04

Plus then becomes educational that sometimes people make mistakes then we say sorry

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Sat 06-Oct-12 11:26:34

rainbow grin

I do shout too, I think everybody does from time to time. I know 2 mums who don't but they are a bit "disconnected", IYSWIM.

SB FX it will be what you want.

CP good job!

NK not sure! DD2 has been asking "bebe cool" all morning pointing at the window hmm, and making a sad face when we say no school today, I do wonder if she likes her "cool" grin.

BC the walk sounds nice good luck with the rest.

DD2 also wakes up early enough especially now that she refused to pee in the nappy or to keep a wet nappy if she peed in her sleep. So one wake up at 11h and one at 5h. TBH I am not willing to spent the next 3 years getting up in the night to make her pee hmm, not sure how to solve that though.

NK2b1f2 Sat 06-Oct-12 11:32:22

Mous dd1 had a tantrum last night because there is no school today... Guess it's better than having to drag her to school kicking and screaming smile

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Sat 06-Oct-12 11:38:29

At least, I have no doubt about leaving her in the morning or full time, I am a bit hmm that she is so bored with us. So yes definitely better! I am blush though because she is the only one without problem settling within her peers.
But by experience with DD1 I know it can will come on later.

StoneBaby Sat 06-Oct-12 11:51:05

mous glad to hear your DD2 enjoys school

bc tiredness is our worse ennemy. I hope you'll manage to get more rest/sleep

CP how is moving going? Good to hear you're getting more sleep and that your holidays went well

survival how did your DS2 spent the night? Hopefully the ab will sort the Indection and won't nake him sick

DS closed the car door on my finger this morning, it is now bruised and hurts a lot.

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Sat 06-Oct-12 13:38:11

Ouch! SB can you move it alright? Otherwise I would suggest and A&E trip...

NK2b1f2 Sat 06-Oct-12 13:40:45

Dh was a bit of an idiot this morning. He took dd2 into town and just (1.30) came back saying he didn't get everything done that he'd planned because dd2 went a bit crazy towards the end... It never occurred to him that she normally has lunch around 12 and was getting ratty because of hunger! He was a bit blush when I pointed it out to him.

StoneBaby Sat 06-Oct-12 17:49:52

I can move it but the nail area is very sore and blue.

I'm out tonight with a friend!!! DH is staying h9'e and will be taling care of DS.

Ouch SB - I hope it heals up soon!

Yes to everyone about those regrettable but inevitable shouty moments. Like you rainbow, I usually apologise afterwards. A friend of mine suggested that it's healthier to shout sometimes than keep it all inside, so I'm comforting myself with that! DD has been so much better behaved with me lately, though. I think the harder line I've adopted with her is having some effect. Not necessarily the shouting, but if anything, she's been sweeter to me than usual, so the occasional seething moment doesn't appear to be damaging our bond so far.

Survival I'm amazed you're still as together as you are on so little sleep as well as the work and the boys' health issues. Blimey.

CP good climbing, wow!

NK I'm not sure I am coping that well so far, given that I've had someone in to help for a few hours every day - I haven't been put properly to the test yet by having both DC on my own for the entire day!!

DS currently wakes up 2-3 times per night, which isn't too bad as he mostly goes back off again fairly easily, unless I have to change his nappy. This morning's windy gruntings were eased by a bit of co-sleeping, which meant I probably got an hour more than I would have done otherwise. Thursday night was pretty tough, though. Not only was DS especially windy and needed three nappy changes, DD had a bout of croup which, although relatively mild, distressed her mightily and sounded awful, not to mention the extra nocturnal requirements after the initial coughing fit. Thank goodness for our humidifier.

Thankfully, DD was fine last night and the cold that precipitated the croup seems to be largely in abeyance, so hopefully that's an end to it. I'm just keeping my fingers crossed DS hasn't caught it. It's the first time DD's had croup, but I realised what it was straight away. Scary, though. I got DH to phone NHS Direct and check the symptoms as I wasn't sure what to look out for to suggest it's getting nasty. Luckily, DD didn't have any of those.

I've currently got both DS in disposable nappies after religiously using washables up to now. DS because all the washables I've tried on him have leaked hopelessly, so I'm going to wait until the quantity of pee has calmed down a bit (he's peeing about every ten minutes!) and try again. DD has taken to removing her nappy the moment it's wet, which suggests she's ready for potty training, but I'm not quite. I need my tummy to be a bit better before I'm running around after her and mopping up the inevitable accidents. Meanwhile, changing washable nappies with DS in a sling if he's awake is simply too tricky, so I've resorted to bunging DD in pull-ups for convenience' sake. Hey ho. I'll try and re-establish my green credentials in due course...

Climbingpenguin Sat 06-Oct-12 20:58:21

you definitely have better things to think about and not nappies. I hope it gets better soon, sorry to hear you're having a tough time healing, it must suck!

I say sorry to DD and also say 'mummy, no shouting' in the same way I'd tell her, which means she tells me to stop shouting when I do. This always makes me feel really guilty snaps me out of it.

The house is getting there. Most things are in-situ however the place was really dirty and dusty so we have to slowly get everything out of cupboards again to clean them all down. Also meant I have had 7 nights here of my asthma being activated at night as the bedroom is the worst. Got it really well hoovered today so <fx> tonight will be better. Unfortunately with two young ones around priorities are making sure the house is baby/toddler proof and their rooms. Also the cleaning at the old flat is on going and we've done no prep for DS's birthday. We need both places ready for Sunday (DS is one on thurs!!).

NK2b1f2 Sat 06-Oct-12 21:20:59

IC My admiration with your coping skills includes the fact that you are happy to accept help! :-) I got myself into quite a state after I had dd1 and wouldn't have been able to allow anyone to come in and give me a hand.

NK2b1f2 Sun 07-Oct-12 20:19:40

Dd2 is a bit under the weather (again!) and earlier asked if she could go back into my tummy sad. Would have happily let her to make her feel better but had to tell her she is too big now... Then dd1 got the giggles about the thought of my tummy bursting (charming), and dd2 cheered up a bit seeing her sister laughing so much.

StoneBaby Mon 08-Oct-12 09:24:05

NK your dd2 makes me laugh

So it was a false alarm. My cycle this month was 34 days which obviously made my ov date completely wrong as I calculated it on a 38 days cycle. angry next month I'll use ovulation sticks

Climbingpenguin Mon 08-Oct-12 13:16:04

<hands over chocolate to sb>

we all still have our cough nk. I've accepting we're in the season of always having tissues stuffed into every pocket.

Climbingpenguin Mon 08-Oct-12 13:21:38

I actually couldn't speak the first day I got down from the mountains and ordered a drink in the bar while I waited for pick-up blush. It had been very gusty on the tops though, had to sit down in places and wait for walking on.

Hope DD picks up soon.

DD and DS are really starting to play with other now. DD crawls around next to him chasing him. DS climbs onto DD's bed (but he can't climb down yet). He still isn't walking either, about once a week he repeats his sequence of three steps and then that's it.

What food should I get for a little birthday celebration do you think? I'd like to get stuff that one year olds actually like. plus the ILs faces when I serviced jam sandwiches last time was priceless

StoneBaby Mon 08-Oct-12 13:41:27

Mini banana muffins? Marmite sandwich? I'm trying hard to find food your ILs may not enjoy A fruit hedgehog?

rainbowweaver Mon 08-Oct-12 15:14:02

Oh and DD tells DH and me to "stop shouting, you two" when we get a bit too animated grin mind you she also tells us to stop talking as she's talking when she wants to say something. Usually follows by some informative sentence about what she did in nursery. smile

rainbowweaver Mon 08-Oct-12 15:14:38

poached chicken skin cp

rainbowweaver Mon 08-Oct-12 15:15:00

they will gobble it up!

rainbowweaver Mon 08-Oct-12 15:30:29

sorry blush fit of exuberance thinking of how to shock your ILs. was also going to add pork fat. Maybe you can try vegetarian versions. DD loves all these unhealthy, fatty stuff.

Climbingpenguin Mon 08-Oct-12 16:29:31

I think they'd be thrilled just to see meat products there.

NK2b1f2 Mon 08-Oct-12 16:33:09

Can you borrow a goat or sheep, hand them a knife and invite them to help themselves? grin

rainbowweaver Mon 08-Oct-12 18:55:25

grin or maybe just a fish first

I could do chicken I think - I've seen it done before by my grandmother though I've never done it myself.

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Tue 09-Oct-12 09:45:32

Hug SB
<sex every 3 days starting from the last day of the period should cover all your fertile time if you don't want to fiddle with sticks>

CP vegan pancakes with savoury and sweet fillings? nachos/ guagamole and other dip? houmous and veg? mendiants (nuts and raisins in chocolate, you can hammer the nuts to make them safe for toddler)

Climbingpenguin Tue 09-Oct-12 12:47:39

what would you have as fillings?

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Tue 09-Oct-12 13:01:17

some mushroom ones, may be some spicy one : veg or red beans mix, with some morrocan or indian spice mix, some cheesy one if you have a nice vegan equivalent with nutmeg and spinash, ratatouille works well too as for sweet; nutella/banana is a must, jams, fruits compotes

Climbingpenguin Tue 09-Oct-12 13:25:18

that sounds really good, but I just don't have the time. Still got loads of flat cleaning and the cake to make yet. Plus Saturday I have tutoring for two hours and the children have swimming.

So far I'm thinking
garlic bread
salad bits and dips (hummous, baba ganoush, salsa, guacamole)
jelly (DS loves jelly blush)
fruit salad
cake (going for vanilla sponge this time)

DS would love pancakes though. Can you make them a bit in advance and leave in a oven?

I have found a website that sells vegan cheese/meats that is soy free so hope to get a order in that soon.

not sure if DD will go off today, she's also not slept through for about 8 days now. Do yours make up songs about what they're doing?

Climbingpenguin Tue 09-Oct-12 13:26:10

also presents

i was wanting to get him a soft doll but everyone is a bit hmm about it. That or a good quality big bouncy ball but can't seem to find any, it's all that thin plastic shit.

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Tue 09-Oct-12 13:29:33

With normal pancakes you can (I like them better cold though), I don't know about vegan ones.

Climbingpenguin Tue 09-Oct-12 13:38:22

brilliant have found DD's old ball and getting a froggy one for DS

StoneBaby Tue 09-Oct-12 14:02:51

I freeze stuffed pancakes but can't advised on the vegan ones but I xan't see why not?

mous every 3 days! shock I'll need to find the energy blush

ScienceRocks Tue 09-Oct-12 14:56:55

CP sounds fab, how many are you expecting? Can't believe your DS is one already shock

SB sorry it wasn't meant to be this month. Keep trying grin

IC I, too, am in awe of your coping skills so don't worry about the odd shout. It happens to us all every day now and then. And I agree with NK about how sensible you are in asking for help when you need it. Too many of us me included are too stubborn and plough on when we should really get help in.

survival how are you? Sleep deprivation is the worst thing in the world. Are things getting any better?

Rainbow, mous, nk and everyone else, hello <waves>

Things with me are fine. DH is still trying very hard, with just the odd slip up. He is definitely much better at the weekends - much more engaged and lively with us, rather than slipping into slob mode - but the weeks could still do with some improvement. He is drinking less and trying to be a bit more organised too.

My DDs are good too. DD1 has started a few after school activities and I'm a bit concerned that I've become one of "those" mums. But maybe being aware of it means that I'm not? Anyway, she is learning piano and going to theatre classes, both of which she loves, on top of her Rainbows and swimming. She gets tired, but seems to enjoy it all and is staying on top of her school work (and I have rotas with other mums to make it all a bit more manageable for me!). She will be six years old next week shock

DD2 is doing well. We still haven't had an accident at night shock and she is so sweet in the morning as she comes in to give me a kiss and cuddle and tell me that she loves me and that it is 7am. Bless her. Such a lovely way to start the day. She seems to know all her numbers and letters and is loving books and imaginative play. She ADORES her sister. She is my little ray of sunshine smile though she has some two year old moments when she decides she doesn't want to wear tights (in October)/eat cheese (which she loves)/brush her teeth (which she also loves) etc grin

As for me, I am busy with work. Busier than ever, it feels. I'm not sure I have the juggling act right yet, as I find I am only just managing all my work, the girls, the house, being a governor, being a PTA secretary and my ILs. Sometimes I forget to phone my mum and then I feel I have failed. But it is all good, most of the time.


<apologises for now characteristic me post>

Climbingpenguin Tue 09-Oct-12 17:17:42

science and those with older ones, did you give the older one a present for the younger one's birthday (if that makes sense). DD kinda gets that it's DS's birthday but keeps mentioning it will be hers too.

I was just thinking of trying to get DD to learn some number by sight to help with telling the time, but getting to sit still long enough to do some book stuff. Although we've started on those floor puzzles if I get DS down in the mornings and I was surprised at what she could do. She saw some other kids being really active at song time today so that was it, 10 mins of running round in big circles ensued. Meanwhile DS kept crawling into the open cupboard while a few of the helpers were putting away toys.

ScienceRocks Tue 09-Oct-12 17:38:53

cp no, I don't do a present for the older one at the same time as the younger one gets birthday presents (or vice versa) but at the end of the day, I will do a "Thank you for being good" present at bed time. I do this on mine and dh's birthdays too. The dds never seem to remember that this happens grin and it's a nice way to round off the day as it's usually a book or pyjamas (that they needed anyway or I had put to one side). Makes for a good bedtime too smile

Didn't Bc get her DS a doll for his first birthday CP?
Your nosh ideas sound yummy!

FX for your DH keeping it together Science and a big yay for the dry nights!

Boo to AF arriving this month, SB - here's to the next cycle!

Thanks for all the votes of confidence!

We've started toughening up on DD - her behaviour is getting beyond a joke and mine and DH's patience is wearing very thin. So as well as all the positive stuff, we're moving into Supernanny territory, giving DD a warning then a time out followed by an apology and a hug if she disregards requests to do/not do certain things. Seems to be getting through, but it's early days. I've had enough of her rudeness and deliberate defiance and having a new sibling doesn't mean she can get away with it as far as I'm concerned, even if it does explain things (but she was already getting worse before DS arrived).
<stern mummy emoticon>
We shall see.

DH and I have also decided we're going to tackle potty training when half term rolls around in a couple of weeks. We're going to take DD shopping to buy Big Girl Knickers plus another potty/toilet seat/stool etc. then go for it.
Can I have thoughts about travel potties? CP you have a potette, I think? Any recommendations from your experience, fellow Febbers?

StoneBaby Tue 09-Oct-12 23:27:59

No travel potty here, just a spare one (1st price in Boots which was smaller than the home one) put in a bag with a bottle water and some nappy bags (to dispose of wipes and poo). I wiuld not bother with a toilet seat 2nd time around as DS never used the one we have as he did not feel safe in it (this remind me I need to put it for sale). Good luck with the behaviour and pt.

StoneBaby Tue 09-Oct-12 23:29:12

PS: DS has been promised that he'll gave his toys back on Friday if he behaves nicely at nursery (aka does bite anybody).

StoneBaby Tue 09-Oct-12 23:29:29

Have not gave

SurvivalOfTheUnfittest Tue 09-Oct-12 23:30:30

CP yes we buy a smallish present for the other DS but not for grown up birthdays.

IC I've never bothered with anything other than lumping the main potty around and finding a drain to empty it into! Recently, I have to confess to carrying an empty coke bottle with a lid for emergencies!! There have to be upsides to having two lunatic boys!!

Hi to all. Have to got to bed as it's a work night!

SurvivalOfTheUnfittest Tue 09-Oct-12 23:42:11

Debenhams black carrier bags are good for a little discretion when containing a potty (and big enough too).

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Wed 10-Oct-12 05:34:33

CP No present if it is not your Bday here (they have to learn young enough that it is someone else special day, especially if they go to some Bday party soon). Anyway there is always some GPs or friends that will bring something for the other siblings.
BTF DD2 didn't have any trouble last time (she liked the packaging better) but she didn't have to wait too long as her Bday is 10 days after DD1.

IC no travel potty here, a few emergency stop between cars, but after 1 or 2 months I made her wait for the next pit stop with no accident (good because she does sometime ask in the middle of the metro, I wouldn't use a potty here either). IMO it is far too much faff especially with a small baby with you. Most places you go to have toilets and are willing to let small children go.

Climbingpenguin Wed 10-Oct-12 07:48:52

I got DD the travel one after carting the big one round for a few days and realising the frequency was not going to change anytime soon. She has now consolidated her wees and can hold so we rarely use it. I'd see how it goes and what her pattern is. I don't regret buying it though, especially with her love for al fresco weeing, it helped to say no we do it in the potty and be more strict with it. She only does frequent wees now if we are somewhere new as she likes to the toilet and using all the new different combinations of toilet/potty and bits of soap.

NK2b1f2 Wed 10-Oct-12 13:36:24

IC I have a lovely John Lewis pink toilet seat thing if you want it... dd2 never liked it and just uses the big loo.

I am one of those who never took a potty with me anywhere either... We are never that far from a loo that dd2 can't hold on (having said that my two appear to have bladders like footballs).

As for presents for siblings, I am a bit soft it seems. I always get at least a token present (a few stickers, small car, bouncy ball) for siblings under the age of 5. I agree they have to learn that it's not their special day, but I just like to see their faces light up when they get a small parcel to unwrap smile. I have also been known to get a proper present for a toddler sibling and a small present for their baby sibling (let's face it, the baby has no idea and the toddler is going through quite a change) wink

SB Keeping fingers crossed for you for next time

That's very generous of you NK - if it's no trouble that would be lovely!

Thanks for all the thoughts on potties on the go. I'll take CP's advice and observe DD's pattern before deciding whether to cart one around with us or not.

I remember me and my sister getting unbirthday presents up to about age 5. I don't think it spoiled either of us unduly!

Well, DD was much better behaved today. Whether the Supernanny technique is already paying dividends or she simply got out of bed on the right side remains to be seen. I took both her and DS to Spanish playgroup this morning (first outing just me with the two of them) and it went very well. DD was very well behaved and DS pretty much slept in the sling the whole time - even through a nappy change for DD. They're currently synchonising naps at lunchtime, which is a godsend as I'm able to grab a recharge Z or two myself. DS is only waking a couple of times per night, but the windiness and attendant squirming and hurrumphing is a major sleep disruption for me, even if DS stays asleep through most of it. I'll be very pleased when he's started making enough lactase to stop it happening...

NK2b1f2 Wed 10-Oct-12 21:02:55

IC Maybe a nice opportunity to come on a brief visit sometime soon... ? grin

SconesForTea Thu 11-Oct-12 11:22:01

Gah I just wanted to do a quick post but I have had nonstop interruptions for the past hour, it is beyond a joke!!! Stop ringing doorbell!!! And I have ILs due in 10 minutes now and not tidied up confused Not that they will notice actually as they all live in squalor (harsh but fair I'm afraid).

In no particular order

IC we have never used a travel potty - DD has been happy to use big toilets when out and about (without a booster seat) from the start. I suppose they are all different. She does 2hr car journeys now without a nappy (DH's doing, I was still nappying her). Great that you've had a good first solo outing with your two. It does get easier and easier (saying that, it is nice and easy when the baby is still just eating and sleeping and everyone wants a hold anyway - I hardly knew i had DD2 for a few months).

SR fab that your DH is behaving himself. Long may it continue. I am shock that your DD2 knows all her numebrs and letters. Is that very early, or am I Mrs Slack (I know I am blush) in not considering those yet?

CP when is DS party! Happy birthday to him! You are making far more of an effort with food than I plan to with DD2's party. I am doing bread, cheese, pate, crudites and houmous, and crossing my fingers that my dad will offer to bake the cake as he did for DD1. Then I will get everyone drunk so they don't notice the lack of culinary effort grin

SB shame about AF this month but better luck next time. TTC is tiring grin but fun grin

survival how are your boys healthwise and sleepwise atm? And you?

Waves and hugs to everyone else. I really do have to put some toys away in the playroom, which is still our only living room 7 months on from moving in. We are desperately trying to finish the real living room before DD2's birthday or basically we would have to cancel her party, there is just not enough room without it. So a good motivating factor. <mutters darkly about how once the kitchen and living rooms are finished I will never touch DIY again if I can help it and never mind that the rest of the house needs doing>

SconesForTea Thu 11-Oct-12 11:23:50

Oh and we won't get DD1 a present for DD2's birthday. Perhaps some family may, that was never done for us as children and so I'm not used to it I suppose and I also suppose I'm quite old-fashioned in my parenting I have discovered and I don't think it will hurt DD1 to realise that it is DD2's special day and not hers.

Climbingpenguin Thu 11-Oct-12 12:04:48

scones it is on sunday and i only think about as half the standard party food ware isn't vegan, plus have to be soy free as well

I admit the idea of a sibling present always seemed silly before but then DD started coming out with some stuff. I think we'll be fine actually as in reality it will be DD 'helping' to open the stuff and I know GP's will get some odd bits of clothes anyway.

DD did the scotland trips with no travel nappy on.

Bearcrumble Thu 11-Oct-12 13:41:46

Hi everyone - finally got a chance to post.

DD has been in full wonder week 26 mode from about 23 weeks and I am just seeing the light at the other end of the tunnel. She's actually asleep now in her pram (with the raincover on as she fell asleep when we were shopping so I'm a bit worried and keep checking she is still breathing) but for about the last 4 weeks she's been incredibly awake and demanding.

She started on food about a week ago and there's no stopping her. Very different to DS - she hates to be spoon fed so it seems I am doing BLW properly this time after pooh poohing it a bit when it didn't work with DS. Shows how different children are, also his dexterity and muscle tone were nothing like as good as hers because of his low birth weight and prematurity.

DS has been pretty good. He still likes nursery - adores his key worker, Joel. I am going in on Monday to do baking with the kids.

SB Sorry you aren't pregnant yet - still early days. x

CP Hope party goes well. Sounds like you're very prepared. Someone put a recipe up on MN for sweet potato falafels that I did for DS's second birthday - they were very nice and, I think, vegan.

Last night DS was singing tunelessly to himself "milk, miiiiilk, milk, milk, milk" and I asked him if that was the milk song. "Yes", he replied "shall we put it on youtubes"?

Climbingpenguin Thu 11-Oct-12 13:43:41

I'm buying falafel's from sainsbo

DS has only in the past month let us spoon feed him. Hope you get a restful period with DD.

DD is not sleeping so I've chucked waybuloo on to get some quiet time for me.

rainbowweaver Fri 12-Oct-12 02:57:15

No travel potty here too. Have been guilty of alfresco weeing as cp puts it, when we're in playgrounds where there are no loos close by. grin actually there are usually no loos near playgrounds, why? And when we are out for the day in London, DD is in her big girl pants with pull-ups over so that she'll realise if any accidents. So far none! If out for an hour or so, we put her in the bright bots (thanks again mous) calling them her going-out pants. Conversational approach to potty training works!

bc grin at your DS and YouTube

science wonderful to hear things improving. Was thinking about you the other day and keeping fingers crossed for you and DH.

scones DD learnt her letters and numbers from an iPad app. DH downloaded one a few months ago. I can find out which one, if you're interested? Starting online self study early.....

rainbowweaver Fri 12-Oct-12 03:00:53

Toddler entertainment ideas - Made DD some flour and water mix dough on Sunday, with some food colouring drops in of appropriate colours. Add some cookie cutters. DD completely engrossed for 2 hours.

Climbingpenguin Fri 12-Oct-12 07:54:15

ae'd say now that the weather is wet (i) weeing outside will be better than when it's a dry field populated with loads of people and (ii) you'll be outside less

rainbow DD used to like it so much she would just do it at able points. Normally while I was putting DS into the car and then I'd hear her shouting 'I'M DOING A WEE WEE'.

started doing some online stuff with DD learning wise so if you know of any normal places that can be accessed with a laptop that would be good. Although I only do it in the rare cases of DS is asleep and she's up. Unfortunately DS is saying goodbye to morning naps.

NK2b1f2 Fri 12-Oct-12 14:41:15

dd2 is furiously independent in using the loo now but just had a bit of a panic moment, shouting that she had poo on her hands... grin I took the opportunity to suggest to her that I really didn't mind helping her when she does a poo. Hope she remembers because she is not very good at wiping.

I have absolutely no idea if dd2 knows any letters at all or recognises numbers (I have heard her count to 17 though). dd1 started reception aged 4 and 2 months not knowing all letters and not counting to 20 reliably. A year later she is absolutely flying, so I am not worried about dd2 for at least another 2 1/2 years smile. I don't think I'll sit down and teach her either because I can't see the benefit of her knowing the alphabet at 2 1/2 to be honest. If she shows an interest I will obviously answer her questions, but apart from that I tend to just let her potter. She is currently sitting on my lap having a very animated conversation with a small magnet, a wooden ladybird and two hair bands.....

StoneBaby Fri 12-Oct-12 17:22:56

DS can count to 10 in French and recognizes the letter S because of his initial. I'm not to bother yet. How many colours do your LO know? For DS every is blue and when we say the correct colour he goes oh yes.

Bath is over so I' need to go

NK2b1f2 Fri 12-Oct-12 18:12:46

SB dd2 knows pink grin

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Fri 12-Oct-12 18:57:17

sB Nk what you need is a book called "wobble bear says yellow".

(I would recommend "Lost" and "how to catch a star" or "barbapapa" at that age or "eric karl")

DD2 is still more or less non verbal, but she has been able to count to multiples of 4 ("papa, mama, toto, bebe") for a long time and answers correctly to how many acorns in playschool by showing.
She is non fuss about colours (we do grey car, white car, blue car, ... all the time) unless she has to dress confused and she has to have specific things, but since DD1 is reading and writing she is trying to as well. She can draw convincingly a lot of letters (I think it is a fluke but I am a hard parent, I might have thought she was a genius if she was my pfb), recognised the A E I O and N, M, S, D and B are still the same to her though. She asks for the letters in the ads in the subway and the streets all the time.

CP good luck

IC you are doing very well

rainbow, BC, science, SOTU, scones, stoof <wave or hug as you wish>

Climbingpenguin Fri 12-Oct-12 18:57:31

DD has known the basic colours for a fair while (we learned those with her nappies as we have a selection), can do up to 19 but gets stuck saying 20, it always is said as 17 confused. Shapes she knows circle, pentagon, star, triangle, stripes etc. but struggles with rectangle and square (although we seem to come across them less than the others). Animals and noises she known for ages too. We had a renaissance period when DS was born but not much since. She found 2 and 3 on the clock today but probably won't be repeated tomorrow. I want her to learn 3 and 9 first.

I often go a day without really sitting and playing with them but like NK says it's just whether they learn the knowledge now or later, I don't think generally much to do with intellect. We talk non stop when out normally so she's pretty good at knowing her vegetables and types of vehicles grin

I've got organised with the toys and put loads away to have only a small selection in the living room/bedroom. Plan is to rotate them around which might give us all a bit of structure, even if birthday and Christmas will ruin it.

atm she seems to have got a lot easier when out and about. I feel quite confident pushing the buggy and letting walk alongside or ahead. She's pretty accepting of hand holding for roads or for when it's busy, she'll open gates for me etc. Ditto for getting in and out of the car, I can send her to a 'safe' place while I get DS out. It's all quite nice. As long as she has a basket in a shop she's alright as well, so with DS in the sling it's all a lot less hassle than with a buggy.

Very interesting hearing how everyone's LOs are picking up numbers/letters/colours etc!
DD can count up to twenty in English and Spanish with a following wind. She can identify if there are one, two or three items but after that gets carried away and won't stop counting. She can identify quite a few shapes and knows most of her letters. None of this is because we have pushed her - it's mostly from the books she likes to read with us. She's got an impressive memory, miles better than mine - must have got it from DH!

Climbingpenguin Fri 12-Oct-12 21:12:49

oh yes, she sings most of the alphabet as that's one of the songs I sing to the twinkle twinkly tune when I'm rocking DS off.

DD does stop counting now but usually is still one or two over. It is funny when they get stuck in a loop isn't it grin She gets stuck in a loop when listing people involved in something as well. Half the time her default answer is two though. Just before our most recent Scotland trip she was talking about the last one.

DD is full of cuddles at the home and impromptu's 'I loves you mummy/insert person'. This morning she told DH she was going to come downstairs and give mummy a cuddle because she loves me'. She came downstairs but had forgotten about the cuddle by then.

needs to stop chatting on MN

Bearcrumble Fri 12-Oct-12 21:29:54

DS knows quite a few colours - black, white, red, blue, orange, yellow, purple, green, pink, gold and silver.

Shapes - circle, square, hexagon, triangle, rectangle, oval.

Solids - pyramid, cylinder, cube, cuboid.

Numbers - can recognise most of them most of the time but can't reliably count to ten.

Letters - can recognise X, Z and O. Does not know alphabet.

He is rubbish at songs and nursery rhymes. He's just recently been able to say the first line of 'twinkle twinkle'.

NK2b1f2 Fri 12-Oct-12 21:47:35

For all I know dd2 probably knows a lot more than she lets on smile but as I think I mentioned before, I am not a natural teacher and don't automatically count out things for her, point to letters, name things (what on earth is a cuboid??? <foreign emoticon>) etc. so my two have been stuck with nursery and school to teach them those things. Agree it has nothing to do with intellect... Dd2 asks he most amazing questions so she's not stupid even if she can't tell me what a cuboid is...

NK2b1f2 Fri 12-Oct-12 21:55:28

One example, dd2 knows what our names are including middle names and surname and asked me recently what Oma (grandma) is called. I told her the first name but she also wanted to know the surname. My maiden name ends in 'mann' and dd2 immediately got the giggles saying that can't be right because clearly grandma is not a 'man' grin

Ha ha!
We get a lot of "My Mummy is called IC....My Daddy is called MrIC..." and DD can recite her full name (all four!) and address. She knows a lot of songs now and will "read" several of her books from memory.

Haven't really talked about solid shapes Bc - v impressed with "cuboid"!!

A prize for the first DC who can correctly say and identify a dodecahedron grin

I did the first park run with both DC today and that was fine. DS woke just as we were on our way back to the car and required a quick feed in the front seat, but was otherwise happy to snooze in the sling (to which he is now fully accustomed - although he probably won't be in it much longer as my back can't take the weight...he's not yet ready to go on my back, but as soon as he is, that's where I'll be carrying him). Meanwhile, DD got lots of pushing on the swings and roundabout and had fun pushing the buggy around on the hard standing and running and jumping in puddles.

Climbingpenguin Sat 13-Oct-12 14:09:08

what sling will yo back carry in?

Good question...

I've got the woven wrap (although I need to cut it shorter - it's an XL, which makes it a bit of a faff..) and I'd love to back wrap DS, but I find it hard to get the head support right and of course, you can't adjust once they're up. I've tried back wrapping DS, but he protested vociferously (and I would rather wait until he's fully supporting his head - although he's not far off). His legs are too short for the Connecta at the moment, I tried that and it didn't really work, although I fully expect to get him in that once he's a big enough...

Climbingpenguin Sat 13-Oct-12 14:40:55

I still don't back carry DS yet. I have to use the strap otherwise it tries to slip off my shoulders, plus I feel uncomfortable as being small, the straps can't be tightened any further. He feels secure but it leaves me with a niggling doubt. Also I'm not sure how to work it in winter, but it's getting a bit of a hassle front carrying as I can't bend around that well/chase DD.

I always use the strap to stop it slipping off my shoulders when I back carry with the Connecta and it's been fine for DD since she was less than a year, so probably similar size to your DS - if not smaller..! And I was a lot more slight then too, so I reckon you should be fine.

Once I got the hang of tossing DD onto my back then doing up the Connecta, it was a lot easier (and it only took a wee bit of practice to get the knack - DD was kept happy with a biscuit while I used Youtube videos and a mirror to learn the simplest way)
You can do it!! And it's SO useful once you master it.

Climbingpenguin Mon 15-Oct-12 08:38:13

DD seems better. Although she woke at one point with a 39.8 fever, she still managed to make me laugh loads. Alas I have also caught her lurgy so am achey and feverish, which is on the top of the cough I've had since we moved house. DD is now 18-24 months sized clothing (but lots of 12-18 still fits fine) and DS is in that weird state of one size being too small and the next (9-12) being far too big.

<hands a largely uneaten birthday cake around> (I'm going to buy new baking powder and try again to see if that was the reason)

NK2b1f2 Mon 15-Oct-12 22:18:57

Dd2 has told me about 12 times today that grandma is coming to visit Us! This seems a fascinating concept for her because usually we go and see my parents. smile She is very proud to give up her room, too, and has had her cotbed in dd1's room for the past week (we thought we'd better try it out first in case it had been a disaster).

NK2b1f2 Tue 16-Oct-12 17:29:38

erm, how do you tell off a toddler who has been told to wash her hands thoroughly and then does it so well that both she and bathroom are dripping wet? grin She is not impressed that she has had to change straight into pyjamas...

Climbingpenguin Tue 16-Oct-12 19:51:14

bless her, we just focus rolling up sleeves and being careful. The fact she didn't like changing her pyjama's means you can use that to remind her. DD's pretty good at the whole finger, thumb and back of hand cleaning now how exciting is this parenting lark.

felt quite rough when DH got in and really really cold. Went to bed taking some paracetamol and 1hr 15mins got up and my temp is 39 so wonder what it was before. Walking DCs to the shop and park (for just 15 mins) was not one of my better ideas.

NK2b1f2 Tue 16-Oct-12 21:43:34

CP Oh no, hope you get over it quickly. No fun being ill yourself with two young children... sad I've just decided to take dd2 to the Gp tomorrow just to be on the safe side. Her cough is terrible and seems to be getting worse not better. I can never tell with my two whether a cough is just a cough or something worse (pretty good at spottingt the danger signs in myself but then I have plenty of experience with pneumonia... hmm)

StoneBaby Wed 17-Oct-12 08:46:46

CP I hope you'll get better soon

NK hopefully she's too bad. DS gets chest infections on a regular basis

My mum is arriving today and as much as I'm gappy to see her I'm dready DS behaviour as he knows she'll let him do more things. Fx it'll be fine.

StoneBaby Wed 17-Oct-12 08:47:02

Sorry dreading

Climbingpenguin Wed 17-Oct-12 11:47:21

thanks nk your post made me google and ring the GP. Turns out I do have a infection plus asthma is complicating it too, so on antibiotics and have up my asthma meds quite a bit. peak flow down from 430 to 280 and quite breathless today. Children are in nursery this afternoon though ignores fact I have a physio appointment at 3

NK2b1f2 Wed 17-Oct-12 14:46:13

CP sad but glad you are getting treatment!!!

dd2's cough is fine but she has an ear infection...

NK2b1f2 Wed 17-Oct-12 16:38:16

dd2's nursery key worker pulled me aside to have a word... Apparently dd2 refuses to speak to her and she is trying to do all sorts of assessments on her. dd2 is happy to chat to her 'boyfriend' and other nursery friends and a student staff member and also chats/sings to herself but as soon as she is observed she won't speak. So her keyworker wanted to know from me what she is like at home, if she speaks, and if she knows numbers, colours and shapes...
I have much sympathy with dd2 and think it is really funny. There's this strange person with a note pad intently looking at her waiting for her to do and say something grin and she KNOWS she is being tested, so won't comply. You go girl!!

Just heard her shout 'I actually need a poo dd1!' so there's nowt wrong with her langugage development grin

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Wed 17-Oct-12 17:05:39

NK grin. Your DD is funny.

CP take care hope you feel better soon.

The girls are intoxicated by "gangnam style", korean music, DD2 is dancing very well on it hmm, I am not sure how many more time I can hear it though! My cold is not helping, but they are laughing so much grin

Climbingpenguin Wed 17-Oct-12 18:32:06

you'd like to think that the key worker noticed that she talked normally the rest of the time wouldn't you?

NK2b1f2 Wed 17-Oct-12 19:54:07

CP I agree but I think the problem is that the person doing the assessment has to hear and see the child do something before they can tick the relevant box (the whole testing is bonkers if you ask me...)

Mous Hope your cold gets better too smile

Bearcrumble Wed 17-Oct-12 20:36:41

Mous and CP - get well soon.

I am a bit weirded out by DS's recent prudishness/obsession with private parts - he keeps telling me to 'cover up your boobies'! I'm like, "I have to feed the baby". I have no idea where he got it from. and he keeps putting his hand down his trousers/pants and not because he wants to go to the loo. I am perturbed.

He was badly behaved at nursery this afternoon - key worker wouldn't say exactly what he'd done in front of the other parents - but said he was 'unsettled' - am hoping it isn't anything to do with the row me and DH had last night - it was brief but explosive. I didn't have dinner ready exactly for 5 when he got home and he was trying to say he wish I'd told him it wouldn't be ready so he could keep working a bit longer but I heard it as 'why isn't my dinner on the table' and screamed 'FUCK YOU' and stormed out with baby in the pram to calm myself down with a little walk. What is really awful is that DS was copying me sad Things had been going really well - I hope it is just a glitch bought on by serious sleep deprivation (baby is TERRIBLE at the moment - wants to be latched on all night pretty much - will sleep for about 20 mins if I unattached her).

Baking at nursery went ok but DS showed off massively because I was there and kept trying to push in and do everything.

IC - I would love to learn how to get a baby into a back carry with my ergo, I am much too frightened at the moment to attempt it but there is another mum at nursery who goes around with her younger child in one so I may ask her for a lesson.

Sorry for me-me-me.

Climbingpenguin Wed 17-Oct-12 20:45:41

bc that sounds tough and obviously you needed help not just more time on your own to do. It's hard when we're sleep deprived to act rationally but agree not great for DS either.

As for sleep, I was at that point and unable to sleep through the latching so that's when we started changing our night routines.

I don't know how the ergo works but actually I'm quite comfortable putting DS on my back and was happy from the get go. I found a few you tube videos and clicked through a couple until I found one that worked. As I said I'm uncomfortable with going to tighten it further but having no more room to. I did have some nice long mirrors in the bedroom to try it out on though which our new house is missing.

Have you debriefed with DH about what happened and why you felt that way about what he said?

No idea about private parts, but I think the touching is a very common thing. If it's for pleasure I think the advice is to explain that it's fine but that kind of thing is done in private in your bedroom, not when other people can see (but obviously look it up more and see if other people know more than me). It is hard to go again the instinct reaction a lot of people have of recoil and shouting no don't do that.

As for covering up breasts, wonder where he got that from. I think just some explaining (and lots of re-explaining) will cover that one).

right bed time for me

Oh CP, NK rubbish about the illnesses - I hope the infections clear up pronto.

Good luck with your mum's visit SB!

Ugh to your bad nights Bc - no wonder you're on a short fuse, who wouldn't be?
I think toddler boys' obsession with their willies is very common - I'm kind of looking forward to the comedy aspect of that when DS discovers this extraordinary gadget he possesses - not to mention many a mortifying moment in public for me I suspect...!
As for lessons in back carrying - I learned how to do it with the Connecta by doing a search on Youtube - I bet you'll find similar with the Ergo! Once you can manage to get the baby/toddler onto your back, the rest is usually relatively straightforward! I found I had no problem getting DS on my back now I've had so much practice with DD, but his smaller size makes getting him in the Connecta a bit tricky (although he's growing so fast and his neck is getting so strong, I don't think it'll be too much longer before he'll be fine!) and although I can back wrap him, I can't get the head support right.

I've just had three days straight of just me and the 2 DC while DH is at school - yesterday was the toughest because DS wouldn't settle for his nice long naps. Monday and today were far better. Mind you, the pay off yesterday for DS not sleeping as well during the day (and having an epic Evening Fussy) meant he did his longest stretch yet (5.5 hours) overnight and only woke the once for a feed before 06.30 (shame DD chose today for one of her rare early mornings....she woke up at 05.30....)

NK2b1f2 Wed 17-Oct-12 20:53:50

BC hugs. Sounds like you've had a tough few days. sad

rainbowweaver Thu 18-Oct-12 03:42:39

Something to cheer you up

Climbingpenguin Thu 18-Oct-12 08:17:19

I can't believe how much better I feel after 3 doses of antibiotics smile

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Thu 18-Oct-12 10:18:42

CP smile it's good to know it works when needed!

I have sinus pain, but I think it is just viral so wait and see...

School is concerned with DD2, she is trying to talk but very behind and not repeating the right sounds when she tries. They do think she is clever though, but she is getting frustrated and a bit stubborn (well school said very but believe me, compared to DD1 she is not stubborn at all grin). I have no idea if she knows any colours or shapes, she is not interested in answering (showing) this kind of questions. So I don't know if she doesn't know or doesn't care yet.
I have to find a SALT now who has good knowledge of english, who is used to multilingual children, and used to deal with very young children... a plus would be if he speaks french too... <I knew one but she left in august>
<going back to my haystack to find the proverbial needle>

She is happy, cuddly, cute and funny slightly cheeky though, and for me not stubborn grin.

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Thu 18-Oct-12 10:19:03

Rainbow grin

Climbingpenguin Thu 18-Oct-12 12:00:31

me and sinus pain are well acquainted. If it's just on one side I have found sleeping on the opposite side helpful and seems to stop them getting as bad. Unfortunately 3 weeks of sinus pain is quite common and dismissed as viral over here. tbh I've been mostly grateful with this lurgy that it hasn't gone to sinus's as every cold last year went there. Then again I never really had a cold, just a cough.

ScienceRocks Thu 18-Oct-12 21:00:43

<waves> Anyone for leftover birthday cake?

NK2b1f2 Thu 18-Oct-12 21:31:28

dd2's key worker in nursery cornered me again today (dh usually does the pick up and doesn't talk to her much. He claims he can't understand her... She does have quite an accent (poss jamaican) but then he is useless at understanding any accent. I remember translating for him in New York because he genuinely had no idea what people were saying to him grin and I also had to provide sub titles in Scotland...). The key worker told me that dd2 is the only child in nursery who refuses to leave the table after eating before she has had a chance to wipe her hands and mouth. Well, what's wrong with that? I don't much care for pasta sauce/yoghurt/chocolate etc handprints along the walls and on the sofa, so yes, I do get my two to clean their hands when they have finished eating... confused

Climbingpenguin Thu 18-Oct-12 21:37:15

yep that confuses me too.

<munches edible cake>

NK2b1f2 Thu 18-Oct-12 21:55:19

... it sounded like thinly disguised criticism. I think the staff think we are a little precious while I think the nursery could do better. Counting weeks until dd2 is old enough to join the school nursery class (the Monday after her third birthday!). I have considered moving dd2 to another nursery now but as she seems quite happy my niggles with a few things (since new owner took over) seem irrelevant for the sake of three months.
<wanders off muttering about having eaten too much pizza and not having any space left for cake>

NK2b1f2 Thu 18-Oct-12 22:29:10

Mous. Meant to say I'm keeping my fingers crossed you can find SALT. Sounds very positive that your dd2 is trying so hard to communicate but must be quite frustrating for her, too.

SurvivalOfTheUnfittest Thu 18-Oct-12 22:42:30

Wanted to say a quick hello. Having much trouble getting on here as our internet is rubbish at the moment. Get well to all you poorly folk (and kiddies).
DH off this weekend on his annual jolly. Will be back on here tomorrow night with my glass of wine if the inernet will let me (and it's usually about once a week at the mo! May have to resort to facebook updates again until I figure out what's going on. It seems fine on other sites so thinking it might be a rubbish advert that upsets our end of the line broadband?)
Love to all.

NK2b1f2 Fri 19-Oct-12 08:55:52

Suvival <waves> Was wondering how you are smile.

About to have a mattress delivered and pleased I don't have to stay in until 2. Bit sad though as if I'd known it will come so early I could have visited IC after all... <waves to IC, hope all is well>

StoneBaby Fri 19-Oct-12 15:07:41

CP glad you're feeling better

mous I hope you'll find a specialist which can help

bc how are you?

NK hmm at your DD2 keyworker. What an odd comment!

I'm Jersey airport waiting to checking in (plane is leaving in 1 hour) and can see the fog creeping in. Fx I don't get bound as I'll not find it funny. DS is very happy his mamie is over and really takes advantage enjoys the attention.

Climbingpenguin Fri 19-Oct-12 15:33:45


StoneBaby Fri 19-Oct-12 15:55:25

Thanks CP

rainbow grin

Aw, how irritating NK - ah well, we'll try again soon, eh?!
What's with the nursery thinking it's a bit precious for your DD2 to want clean hands and face after eating? Honestly..!

Had a tempestuous morning with DD - culminating in a huge tantrum because I bundled her into outdoor clothes and the buggy without negotiation (we were trying to catch a train). Once we got to the train station and then the park we were aiming for, she was fine again and in fact pretty good, if not better than usual for the rest of the day. Despite my higher levels of crossness and I'm Not Taking Any Crap approach recently adopted, if anything DD is even more affectionate with me and DS than usual (once tantrums etc. are done). I'm glad she doesn't hold my pissiness and severity against me (any more than I hold her rudeness and wilfullness against her..!)

Climbingpenguin Fri 19-Oct-12 20:37:16

sorry rainbow wasn't ignoring, I've just seen it before

IC I think if your the same with them and emotionally neutral they get on with it rather quickly. If they know they can plead and daddy will give in <stares at DH> then they don't just simply accept your answer of 'no, you've had your one today.

we've had a few meltdowns but related to being tired and not wanting to go upstairs/in the car so we can get home to bed. She had a fever again today on going to bed.

Climbingpenguin Fri 19-Oct-12 20:48:02

how you doing generally IC

Oh bah to the ongoing feverishness, CP! Hope whatever it is departs sharpish.

I think you're right about the pleading/nagging/yelling/giving in situation. I think once I've demonstrated to DD that I WILL follow through with what I say - whether it's yes/no/later etc. - then she tends to be better behaved (assuming illness/tiredness/needing a poo etc. is out of the equation!)

This week I've mostly been on my own (while DH is at work) with both DC and generally, it's been okay, although there are pressured moments. I think I'd be more of a wreck if DS didn't nap as prodigiously as he does. And he's now showing signs of being able to be left for short periods with something to look at while awake without fussing, which means I can do things without having to have him in the sling or under one arm during wakeful periods.

This is also why I'm clamping down on DD - I've realised once there are two DC to deal with, I don't have the luxury of time and patience to work through every toddler issue with DD. She's got to learn that she has to just shut up and get on with it sometimes - or wait while Mummy gets on with it!

I feel slightly hypocritical that I get cross at DD for nagging me to do something and refusing to wait for anything when I also get cross when she doesn't do what I ask her reasonably sharpish. She does the "Let me just....I've GOT to do this first...." etc. when I want her to do something and she's absolutely echoing me.

But tough luck, I happen to be higher up in the pecking order than her (with a small baby's needs to consider too) so I'm dealing with that by telling her "Mummy's the boss!" as an explanation for this double standard...! smile

Climbingpenguin Fri 19-Oct-12 21:32:56

I think you'll learn to give her better warning signals and automatically ask 15 mins before you want to leave. Then by the time you've got to the we're doing it right now stage, she'll accept she had her chance.

NK2b1f2 Fri 19-Oct-12 22:10:22

IC, I'm going to copy your 'mummy's the boss' :-) dd2 is queen of procrastination and often says she hasn't finished tidying up... (Maybe the nursery have a point....) grin

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Sat 20-Oct-12 06:46:06

I did all the hard "mum is the boss" work with DD1 so everything is kind of falling in place with DD2. She knows and follows warnings, and I never really had to punished her I just count 1, 2 and she answers "no 1, no 2" and stops.... grin <but she has seen her very super stubborn sister being punished after 3>
I agree with CP clear warnings and easy time tables make everything easier.

But then I have to stop both DDs to get ready to go outside when I want to stay in. They could stay out all day long too...

DD2 is eating like a horse confused, any growth spurts due? <not that she needs one>
At diner she had half an egg, 2 bowls of soup, one cucumber, one carrot,
2 bananas, 1 apple and a half, a glass of milk and a petit filou shock
This morning she had 4 slices of bread with butter and jam shock with milk.
The good thing about school lunches is that DD2 seems to have passed her fussy not eating stage and she is back to eating almost anything (after a year and a half) <FX> including soup! grin

<waves to SR and Sotu>

Bearcrumble Sat 20-Oct-12 13:14:15

I've been doing the 'think throughs' from the Calmer, Easier, Happier Parenting book with DS. It does work but I have to steel myself to do them as he hates having to answer direct questions of this sort and will have a proper writhing/screaming time of it when we do it so have only done about 3!

What you do is ask them what the right thing to do in a given situation is. They know and they don't want to tell you - but when they know they aren't going to be allowed to do anything else they will eventually. You can't do the answer for them even though it is sooo tempting - you have to wait and keep asking or if they get it wrong thank them for trying and ask them to guess again until they get it right.

He now waits inside the gate on the path from nursery down to the main road. He is getting better at not throwing hard things indoors but he does tell me he isn't going to throw anything near the baby. He's been really good about holding my hand when we are walking on the pavement and crossing roads. So there has been improvement.

The other rather stricter thing I did recently was refuse to let him go out until he'd picked up a sheet of paper he'd ripped up and thrown all over the kitchen. He really resisted it and I thought we might actually be there all day but eventually he did it. I don't mind clearing up general toy mess but when he's done something like that I think it's his job to sort it out.

He still ignores me a lot - and there is a lot of bodily picking him up and dressing him after 5 requests for him to come upstairs and get dressed.

Yes, I find think-throughs to be very helpful Bc! They definitely work when I remember to do them (although DD will often answer the questions exactly right and STILL do the things she had previously acknowledged she wouldn't..!!)

And you're right CP - I think I should have given DD a bit more time to get ready to go out and probably would have avoided the scale of the tantrum, if not the tantrum itself. We live and learn! I dealt myself a harder hand by realising that if we moved fairly quickly, we could get the earlier train which would fit in better with the rest of the day's routine - but with hindsight, I didn't really give sufficient warning to DD, so it's not surprising she kicked off.

Famous last words but...DD's been an angel so far today. She was playing happily with only minimal input from DH and me and because DS was so entranced with his new baby gym (pix on FB!) DH actually managed to get a bunch of marking done and I was able to read my book with the pair of them happily engrossed....

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Sat 20-Oct-12 18:20:07

IC grin DD1 still is engrossed with baby things! it is so funny (apparently in the UK they hide it, here it is quite open and I am glad that my 7 yo is still a child wink)

DD2 went into my bag and took 2 tictac boxes (freebees from the subway) and ate them all shock < I was napping, DH was in "charge" --on the computer, dead brain--> any advice on punishing a long time after it happens for 2 yo? I said I was unhappy and it was naughty but it is too long ago for her to be punished isn't it? or am i too soft?

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Sat 20-Oct-12 18:23:28

GWAD I have to treat DH like a 3rd child, grrrrrrrr that is definitely not what I sign for!!!!!! IT is NOT good for the girls either.... FOR FS....

Oh meh Mous - don't blame you for getting the hump with DH over that one - what a numpty!
Not sure what you can do discipline-wise - toddlers have a rather elastic concept of time and DD2 might not understand what she's being told off/punished about. You could may be try asking her if she remembers what happened to the sweeties in the box and if she can communicate to you that she does and that she ate them, you might be able to take it from there about how she's supposed to ask permission first....

I had a dramatic moment this morning when I put the light on around 07.00 and suddenly noticed that DS' ear was full of blood. It was on the collar of his cardi too. It was obvious DS wasn't in distress in any way and hadn't been at any point during the night. DH was full of consternation and all for ringing NHS Direct, but I told him to wait until I had cleaned the blood up and so could establish where it had come from (it was congealing, not flowing). After a bit of gentle work with cotton wool and sterile water it became obvious that DS had scratched the skin on his ear with his fingernail after managing to get out of the built-in scratch mitt on his sleepy suit. It was amazing how copiously it had bled! Once I had cleaned off the dried blood it started bleeding again, but stopped not too long afterwards. So, nothing to worry about. It was quite a sight, though!

After her angelic morning, it seems that DD has gone down with something. Hopefully only a cold, but she lost her appetite at supper and had a bit of a fever. Boo. It could be a tricky night...

StoneBaby Sat 20-Oct-12 21:32:46

IC what a fright!! Glad it was nothing major

mous angry at your DH but I agree that late punishment may not be the answer as I don't think they understand well time

DS has be very good today and it seems that a reward chart is working for us. After 5 stars he gets a small reward but a bad action cancel the good. Been doing that for 2 weeks and fx it's working push the mn jinx away The presence of my mum at the moment makes him a bit more difficult (ie he refuses to walk and wants tobe in her arms) but no major issues (it'll happen on Monday when they leave).

Off to sleep as I have to be up early for the swimming lesson (8am start). Good night all

Climbingpenguin Sun 21-Oct-12 17:31:33

DS (with DH's help) and DD are rolling a ball backwards and forwards with some giggline.

DD is still enthralled with all of DS's new toys but she did love his playmats.

NK2b1f2 Tue 23-Oct-12 13:27:39

Feeling ridiculously guilty to leave my mum looking after dd1 for the day... You can tell I am not used to family help. sad My mum offered to look after both but I took dd2 to nursery in the end (having to pay anyway and knowing how difficult dd2 can be.)

Climbingpenguin Tue 23-Oct-12 14:42:03

send her this way then NK she can sleep train DS

SconesForTea Tue 23-Oct-12 15:02:08

Hi everyone.

I lurk and read while feeding DD2 but rarely get onto the laptop to post. Now I'm here I'm a bit lost for words.

Mous I wouldn't have punished DD2 for taking the tictacs a long time after the event. I would have been furious with DH though.

IC phew at DS ear bloodbath.

NK is it half term where you are?

I am having a really bad week. Since last Tuesday actually when I thought it was PMT (still getting used to periods after nearly three years of hardly any and being on the pill for years and years prior to that). I just do not enjoy the daily grind of motherhood. I am a real shouty mummy and I hate doing it but can't seem to stop. I can't see a way out. I need to spend some time away from the girls, I think, i.e. get a job, but all the PT jobs round here are pretty much minimum wage, and that won't cover two lots of childcare. That's if I even get one of the jobs against all the competition going for the very few PT jobs. I feel like I'm in a black tunnel of despair and I know that is totally ridiculous as I have so much to be thankful for. I count my blessings and I still feel like crying.

I have fallen out with my Dad over something fairly minor (he doesn't think the girls should come to my Gran, his mum's, funeral but I don't have any childcare for them so they are - all my childcare will be at the funeral confused). I know I should apologise as I have been rude to him and he has just lost his mum but I feel angry and upset and I can't bring myself to.

Poor DH doesn't enjoy his job either but he doesn't cry and moan about it. I don't know why I can't just pull myself together and get on with it.

Sorry. I am really interested in all of your posts but I don't think any of you really like me (there, I've said it).

SconesForTea Tue 23-Oct-12 15:02:43

Aaargh so self-pitying when others have it a lot harder than I do. Sorry everyone.

Climbingpenguin Tue 23-Oct-12 15:39:49

I'm feeling the grind to scones Too many days of aborted naps going on here, he just won't self settle. Plus as I've been ill as I've not had the energy and left him to cry one day (didn't work) then I've been shouty at DD as been no having no me time and she's been having short naps (next work have a load of work going on or the postman wakes her up).

I'm sure your dad is being more sensitive as it is mixed up with his feelings for his mum.

I'm hoping tomorrow will be the first days in ages I take no painkillers. DD desperately deserves some lovely one on one time with mummy.

What about evening's, the night out climbing for me is really lovely (that I've gone the past two weeks so maybe that's why I crave the lunch time more). I then found I started carving out more time. Hopefully next week I'll be running and climbing again (had a month of running).

Remember house moving is stressful stuff and go easy on yourself. DH still says that working is easier than staying at home.

ScienceRocks Tue 23-Oct-12 16:07:11

I like you scones and you are not being self pitying.

Motherhood is hard. It doesn't tell you that in paremting books (or pregnancy test kits), but it is an inexorable truth. Let nobody tell you otherwise. It is also very easy to get so caught up in the drudge of it all - disturbed sleep, not ever being able to eat a meal without having to attend to someone, alwyas having baby detritus on your clothes etc - that it is all too easy to let that overtake your impression of motherhood, and forget the smiles and giggles and nice stuff. After all, it is not dissimilar to focusing on the one person who gives you an appraising look when many other people have commented on how nice you look. But do try and remember the good stuff - how about trying to write down three nice things that happened that day as you go to bed? It may just start to turn your mind from pessimism to optimism.

Have you talked to someone in RL about how you are feeling? If not, please do. Your DH may not be enthralled with his job, but that doesn't mean that he won't empathise with how you are feeling and your desire to escape. Do you have any childcare in place for either of your DDs? Going from two to one every now and then is a massive relief for me, and maybe you would feel the same. If your DH is not the listening type, have you a friend you could talk to? A sister? If things are very bad, please do go to your GP. You have had two babies in a short space of time, and PND is a possibility.

Try not to fret about your Dad. In time, this will feel very minor, but he probably just wanted you there for him and not having to look after your DDs at the funeral. It will pass. He is caught up in grief at the moment. Try not to stress about it when you also have to get through the funeral - I am sure he will realise in time that you had no choice but to take the DDs with you and that this was not the easiest thing for you to do.

CP you be kind to yourself as well. It sounds as though you have had a bad run of illness recently. Hope you feel stronger soon and things get easier.

IC glad your new firm approach is working for you with DD, and bear that you are finding a way with your DS. Like SB, I have started a reward chart with DD2 - they are definitely at a tricky age!

NK don't feel guilty about your mum looking after your DDs. Try and relax into it and enjoy it (easier said than done, I know, I always feel guilty if someone else has my DDs so work or do chores rather than relax).

mous what did you decide about your DD2 and the Tictacs. I am in agreement with most that a late punishment won't work, but a rollocking for your DH is most definitely in order!

<waves to everyone else>

ScienceRocks Tue 23-Oct-12 16:09:20

Oh, and scones, just before I came on MN today I went on FB and was thinking how smiley and lovely you always come across in your pictures and status updates. It is all too easy to pretend thaty all is well when you feel like you are crumbling inside. Don't be afraid - on here, at least - to say how you are really feeling, but rest assured that your party face is working extremely well wink

Climbingpenguin Tue 23-Oct-12 16:59:19

ditto what science said

Nigel may not have napped properly today (20 mins and a 15 mins) but he has just been proper walking around took his time

StoneBaby Tue 23-Oct-12 17:41:42

scones I agree with science. And I like you, you've been of great support for me (and I guess others) in the kast 2 years. <hugs>

Climbingpenguin Tue 23-Oct-12 19:48:31

I missed the bit about you saying you didn't think we liked you. You know that's a part of you mind talking and not reality only because I go through phases convinced no-one likes me and I have no friends

it does sound like you are feeling particularly low, do you still have homestart help. Maybe a visit to HV or GP? Start getting out for 5-10 min walks. It's short enough that you have time when DH is in and it's not too hard to commit to. I know you can't be bothered to go out the door but make yourself (or get DH to) just that little bit of walking alone time can help you see things a bit more clearly.

Climbingpenguin Tue 23-Oct-12 19:50:52

ps I'm always rather jealous of how amazing and happy you look on fb.

science is indeed wise and I agree with her scones. You are totally allowed to feel fed up, it's not easy being a mum, even the most saintly maternal types have their tough times.
And I like you, honest smile
Self-pitying is fine here - if you can't come onto this thread and have a moan/rant/virtual sobbing session, then where can you?
<big hug>

CP and a big hug to you too. You've had it hard lately xx

Crappy nights here - DD has a chesty cold which has given her a persistent cough and causing her to be awake - or half awake - for hours at night. And me too. Even though she's not particularly calling for me, I can't seem to relax knowing she can't sleep. I've been feeling a bit chesty too and am hoping it doesn't do the same thing to me. And DS - so far he seems fine, but ulp!

DS had his first imms today. Not too traumatic really, but he's been a bit irritable and harder to settle ever since. I gave him a little bit of paracetamol as he was feeling rather hot and he hated it - but actually fell asleep not long after, so maybe it helped.

Not helped by rodents (we think) clog dancing in our loft above our room last night. They were probably jumping on the loose boards left by the insulation people when they surveyed it. Meh.

We shall see what tonight brings! Hopefully I'll be able to sleep past 03.00, unlike last night.....

Well, last night wasn't TOO bad - DD coughed loads, but didn't actually want DH or I to go into her (we got shooed out when we went to offer water/cuddles etc.) Eventually she fell asleep, but still coughed through her sleep and kept muttering and calling out without waking up - but not what I would describe as top quality sleep. She's clearly tired today.

DS was a bit fidgety, but actually didn't do too badly. He was dressed very lightly and I think that helped as it is also pretty cool in our room. He was soaking wet at about 04.30, so had to change him completely, but luckily it wasn't too tricky to get him off again. He's asleep now, but his temperature seems to be back to normal so I think (hope) that's it for post-imms reaction - apart from extra sleepiness, which suits me just fine! DD isn't in the mood for anything much beyond sitting on the sofa and watching DVDs, so I'm just going with the flow she's poorly, so it's allowed.

Climbingpenguin Wed 24-Oct-12 14:03:35

we have nights like that with DD. She doesn't fully wake but we wake up every time regardless. I hope she keeps on the mend and you all enjoy some sofa time.

we've downloaded loads of Maisy Mouse lately.

DD still keeps getting fever's in the late afternoon/evening but not really anything else. Been on and off now for 11 days.

I'm feeling much better and only in a bit of pain now. Looks like the landlady is going to try and take loads of money off our damage deposit so have that looming over us and getting ready to fight for it. Just want it over and done with. Apparently the place was up to a professional clean so she wants to charge us for cleaning, carpets (which we've already cleaned, plus they're old), painting (for scuff marks which counts as wear and tear), sanding and painting the front door (which has about 10 coats on and looks old, but the door swelled with condensation due to four people living there instead of one and the paint cracked) and a few other things. Am hoping once this is over and done with we can have a bit of relaxing. Especially I worked out I have been ill or had this back injury for over a month now.

SurvivalOfTheUnfittest Wed 24-Oct-12 20:49:20

Spent an hour on Monday night talking to the nice internet man who has finally got my internet connection back up and working. It looks like it was just in the nick of time to offer lots of sympathy and support.

Scones I like you too. I know Science has offered lots of wise words above and I just want to echo them and say being a mum of two close together in age is really hard. (And I haven't had to move house - I can't imagine that!) It's much easier to say 'yes, we're fine' than to actually find someone to whom you can say, "Actually, things are really shit, and I don't know what to do about it." Do say it to us. Several of us have felt similarly at times in the last few years and I think that's why we are all still on here and bobbing along because we have received so much support from each other. My phrase at such times remains, "Just keep putting one foot in front of the other." I hope you feel brighter soon.

CP I hope you are soon feeling fully better. I haven't been able to exercise for a month after the bronchitis as it hasn't quite cleared properly. I really miss having my escape pass from the house!! Good to hear that DS is walking. Hope the damage deposit is sorted soon. I suffered a similar thing at uni so i feel your pain.

IC I also feel your pain about the night coughing. DS1 did it every night for 6 months from 9 months old. We finally understood it to be part of the reflux (after months of asthma drugs sad) but it was hell. Hope she and you are better soon.

Sorry for not replying to everyone else individually. I've finished tonight for half term (bar an hour I owe them on Friday) and I am truly knackered. DS2 is having night terrors several nights a week and DH was away for the whole weekend (followed by a big late night row when he got back sad) and tonight I am feeling it. Hoping to go to bed shortly in an attempt to recover and will be back once I am more awake and on better form. At least now able to read the thread and keep up again! I've missed you all!

Climbingpenguin Wed 24-Oct-12 20:56:31

does it take a while to fully recover survival please tell me I'm not just being weak I think your right, I'm suffering from the lack of me activities. I can feel myself starting to feel like I was previously. scones I haven't told anyone in RL I'm starting to feel that way again but if vow to if someone asks me how I'm doing.

sorry that DS2 is still having the night terrors, must be very draining. Do you find yourself getting a bit short with him? DD has been waking as much as DS some nights, it seems harder when you're not used to it, we normally only get one waking from her. You any idea about the root course or just one of those things?

DH is out on a first aid course this evening so I am watching far too much west wing.

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Thu 25-Oct-12 06:54:01

Scones I like you too <hugs> We are conditioned to say "how do you do?" "how do you do do?" (ca va? ca va!). And not letting anything on, ask for RL help even if it is very hard.
Science is very wise and she wrote everything I thought much better than I could do.

DD2 keeps pointing at my bag saying "No more tictacs", so I repeat that she shouldn't have had them in the 1st place. But I would guess she shared with DD1, difficult to understand what she says anyway... Even if she is coming better and better.
The 3 languages are mixed up and she speaks more romanian than I thought. She also have her own invented language on top of that that I understand a bit but no one else. She also puts her tongue in between her teeth to speak which makes interesting sounds. At least she is interested now, pointing and asking "what is that?" <well "Ot ta?">

And I was wrong, she does have at least one colour "vert.

IC CP courage for all the illnesses.

I have to prepare my french lesson (gah!!! on french grammar, only 350 irregular verbs to go confusedshock) so waves to everybody else...

StoneBaby Thu 25-Oct-12 09:32:03

mous good news on the talking. It all sounds promising. Are you giving French lessons?

CP I hope you start feeling better soon

survival any ideas on what causes your DS2 nightmares? DS's are caused by separation anxiety but if I tell him at bedtime that maman and daddy are here and in the room next door, his wake up stops. Good luck and enjoy half-term

I'm so tired today as I didn't sleep well so I'm full of admieation for you with 2 as I normally sleep all night.

Ah Survival once again I am left marvelling at how you cope with all the health issues (and other issues..!) that are thrown at you. A couple of nights' coughing drove me close to desperation, several months of it I can't even begin to contemplate. And argh at the night terrors - poor DS2 and poor you, you must be even more exhausted than usual. At least it's half term, thank goodness.

Mous sounds like the talking is coming along - excellent! She'll get there! And work as a translator for the UN or something when she does... wink

SB bad luck on the crappy sleep - hope tonight is better.

CP hope you feel better too - it's been pretty much constant for you too, hasn't it?

Last night was much better for us. DD slept through - whether it was the Calpol, the fact that I'd elevated her cot, turned off the humidifier (which usually works wonders, but this time I suspect it was causing too much dampness that was exacerbating the cough) or that the bug turned a corner and started heading out, who knows? I'm grateful, though. DD's been much better today and her eyes are getting better too (she rubs them into oblivion when she has a cold).

Tonight I've dosed her up with Benylin which has a bit of drowsy-making anti-histamine in it - can't get Medised or Calpol Night anywhere at the moment - so I'm using a half dose of this one (it's not really meant for children younger than 6) to hopefully help soothe DD into another okay night's sleep. Chances are she won't need anything tomorrow...

DH has gone out tonight - he's thoroughly earned it, been working like a dog since the beginning of term (domestically too) so I'm enjoying a little bit of me-time between getting DS off to sleep (it usually takes a few attempts before he stays down) and looking forward to slinking into bed pretty soon with a book...

SurvivalOfTheUnfittest Thu 25-Oct-12 22:12:45

Thank you all. Hadn't meant to moan, but to give support to Scones and all of you with poorly ones/who are poorly. CP it definitely takes a while to be able to exercise after it. I've had three chest/bronchitis infections this year which is more than usual and probably reflects the lack of 'me' time and sleep!! Very annoying though, when I'd got into a great exercise pattern and was looking good! Hope to get back to it next week but determined to be sensible and only go if a) I am well and b) can stand up straight without wanting to fall asleep!!

CP do stick to your promise and tell someone in RL if they ask how you are feeling. In fact, I think you should just try and sart a conversation about it anyway. I know it's an easy thing to say and yet hard to do, but you wouldn't want a friend to struggle alone and no-one you know would want you to either.

IC glad to hear DD's coughing was better last night. Is it half term for DH this week or next? Hope it's good! I'm afraid the main casualty of our 6 months of hideous coughing was losing my best friend - she doesn't have kids and did not understand what I was going through. (In fairness, I don't think anyone except DH did). I think she got fed up of me moaning (and I'm sure you all sympathise with her blush!) and basically disappeared. I often wonder whether I could have done anything differently, but my other friends feel that the answer was no and that it said more about her than me. I thought I had post-natal depression, but I don't think I'll ever know if it was simply pure exhaustion. The bathroom is also falling apart from three 20 minute steaming sessions a night for 6 months!! Mouldy skirting boards and paint falling off!

I had 8 hours of sleep last night, only interrupted twice, which was much better, and feel like a new (if slightly icky - thanks to a poorly mum with whom I work) woman! The night terrors mainly happen just as we are going to bed, rather than in the night. Totally different to nightmares - very distressing to watch and nothing we can do about it, except keep him safe, which is easier said than done, as he gets up and lashes out, but luckily he doesn't remember them in the morning.

Mous your DD2 sounds ace, as ever. DS2 is really struggling with colours. His speech is very good so I am beginning to suspect that he may have some colour vision deficiency. He knows orange and brown, which strengthens my belief, as they are not colours he should know if he doesn't know the primary ones! He can match them as long as the shades aren't too close (e.g. pale blue/silver - confused two car colours yesterday, thinking they were the same) and has learnt to say 'red' when asked colour of strawberries etc.. but if you ask about random objects or beads/lego etc.. he simply has no idea. I worked really hard on it a few weeks ago to see if it was simply that he hadn't got there yet, but it made no difference. In fact, I've backed right off as he's beginning to get worried by no being able to do it. Might mean he can't join the armed forces or be a pilot apparently, but otherwise, I don't think it will be much of a problem.

Have very few plans for next week which is a rather lovely thought at the moment but needs some planning so we don't end up stuck in the house and bored. Anyone got any nice plans?
Night all.x

NK2b1f2 Fri 26-Oct-12 13:27:59

brew and stollen all round... (bit early for christmassy cake but hey...)

Scones sorry to hear you've not been feeling too well. Agree with everything sciences said and sending hugs. Also like you smile

IC sounds like a tough few days you've had. Here's hoping your dd1 is over the worst and none of the rest of you get the bug

survival ditto, just replace days with months sad. Interestingly dd2 also has small night terrors just when we go to bed. It must be related to one sleep phase going into the next? Oh, and interesting about the colours! My younger brother couldn't tell yellow and blue apart as a child and I think he has some colour blindness now.

cp wagging my finger at you to seek help so late after feeling ill so long with a chest infection!

mous good news on you dd2 starting to talk more. Love the thought of her having her own language! smile

We've had a good week with my mum looking after dd1 for two days while I worked. She would have liked to look after both children but realised after the first day with dd1 that both may be too much. She can't walk very far or very fast, so taking both girls to the park would have been impossible. What she has in spades though is time and patience and both girls have been competing furiously to have her attention smile. In fact, the first time in her life dd1 has shown some real sibling rivalry because she had her 'Oma' to herself for two days and finds it hard to share! Just sad the weather has been so grey. Hoping to go on some outings this weekend.

Happy half term to those of you affected...smile

Yep, half term has begun here and so has potty training!
Singularly unsuccessful this morning - initially DD threw a tantrum about sitting on her potty, then virtually refused to get off it when we deployed the chocolate button bribe incentive. She was being super-awkward this morning and I'd already had several run-ins with her and two "time-out" sessions, so probably not the best time to start mood-wise.
The only wee she did this morning went on the floor. Ah well. Here's to a more successful afternoon.

Yesterday we had poomageddon when DD spectacularly burst her nappy while strapped in the buggy having her nap - it went everywhere and I had to carry a screaming DD into the bathroom to hose her down with the shower to get her clean. I doubt the buggy will ever smell quite the same.... and that was even before we commenced potty training. Hey ho.

NK how lovely to have your mum around for the DDs!

Survival glad to hear of a better night for you! About time.....
DD slept fine last night, didn't hear a peep out of her until this morning. And apart from being Little Miss Awkward she does seem to be a whole lot better, hardly coughing at all.
I'm a bit chesty, but I don't think it's going to get too bad.

Climbingpenguin Fri 26-Oct-12 18:53:54

well we're trying DD going to sleep with no dummy

StoneBaby Fri 26-Oct-12 20:12:48

IC how was the afternoon?

CP fx she settles quickly and sleep fine

StoneBaby Fri 26-Oct-12 20:13:37

Forgot to say

DS didn't nap at nursery today but was very short fused as he was overtired

The afternoon was no better for potty training - DD peed in the bath, but nowhere else (apart from her nappy which I put on her for her nap). And she's becoming very resistant, both to sitting on the potty and the loo. We're going to try again tomorrow, but if she's becoming anti the whole enterprise, I think we'll shelve it for now and try again in the near future. I don't think there's any point in pushing too hard, or she'll build up negative associations with the whole idea.

Frustrating, though. DD had been going on for ages about Big Girl Knickers, doing wees and poos in the potty and had been removing her nappies the moment they were damp, so I thought she was ready. DD, it seems, has other ideas.

Still, her behaviour was a lot better after a stormy few hours this morning, so that's something.

Climbingpenguin Fri 26-Oct-12 20:52:37

IC It wasn't until the third day that anything happened with DD. Lots of wees on the floor but we didn't push the sitting on the potty beforehand, just asked her if she wanted to or put her on when she did a wee in case there was any more, plus keep her away the mess.

DD went off OK, it's the night time wakings we're worried about. What DD has been doing for a few weeks now is waking when she needs the toilet. She tends to not know, or verbalise, that what's she wants. Random noises, but not quite crying the cue to put her on the potty/toilet and back to bed. Same for naps and night time (last night was a wee at 1:30 and poo at 5:00 - fun)

I'm mostly fine, have one or two episodes a day with bad coughing, enough to get people to ask if I'm alright but otherwise alright. Plus NHS site said tiredness and coughing can last a few weeks after pneumonia. It's hard to tell tiredness from illness apart from tiredness from children at night time. It is mostly the back pain which is the hassle atm and during a mild cough managed to re pull something today. For better or worse, I've decided next week to start some exercising. At least turning up and seeing what happens, even if I don't do any climbing it's a night out chatting to some people.

(sorry mostly me posts will end soon)

Climbingpenguin Fri 26-Oct-12 20:55:24

oh we plied her with loads of chocolate milk to at least get the wee's flowing

NK2b1f2 Fri 26-Oct-12 21:22:41

CP It may take up to six weeks for you to feel vaguely normal again <more finger wagging from me but also get well wishes - I once lived on the sofa for six weeks because of pneumonia that did not respond to treatment and just about avoided being hospitalised)

IC Keep going! dd2 wet herself continuously for a day and a bit and then got the message smile. We haven't had an accident for more than a month after she got over her protest pees about me working...

rainbowweaver Sat 27-Oct-12 02:46:58

I've been falling asleep relatively early (8pm tonight) and waking up in the early hours. But at least gets me my 8 hours albeit broken up, and some me-time. And DH gets his quiet time in the evenings that he often likes. I'm so looking forward to this weekend and spending time with DH and DD.

I like you too scones and have been coveting your fenced up garden play area smile. You always look great in your fb photos!

ic the much maligned Gina Ford is actually pretty good on the potty training advice front. I was loaned the book by a co-worker (who is actually a big pain in the *ss, but at least I'm mollified by this). Said his wife swore by it, and it does talk you through any problems.

Sends get well vibes to cp, and waves to everyone.

Speaking of wake up wees cp, the other night DD seemed determined not to wee in her nappy in bed, so we were up 6 times in the night to go and wee, but she was dry in the morning! The temptation to not get up was strong but decided to think long-term.

rainbowweaver Sat 27-Oct-12 03:23:54

Was just reading this again, get well to other poorlies toosmile. Everyone seemed in general health at the moment.

NK2b1f2 Sat 27-Oct-12 07:55:47

7:44! That's when I woke up to find both girls awake and chatting to each other... Haven't had such a lovely lie in for ever smile

My 2.8 year old woke up at 4am this morning...and didn't go to sleep again, my 5 week old however woke up 1am & slept through until 6am...<sigh> if it's not one it's the other!

StoneBaby Sat 27-Oct-12 08:52:57

MrsHels I just saw your comment on our previous thread so decided to copy it for the group - Joining a bit late, DS1 was born Feb 10 & DS2 is now 5 weeks old. DS1 has adapted really well to his younger brother & is always giving him kisses & cuddles.

I just wondered what time your toddlers go to bed? We rarely get ours in bed before 8:30, which I didn't think was a problem but my mum insists it's too late & also pointed out he will need to go to bed earlier when he's at school & making his bedtime earlier when he's older will be difficult. So what time do yours go to bed?

My DS is in bed at 6.30pm at the latest and wakes up at 6.30am and sometimes 7am at weekends. I would say to do what is the best for you and your DS.

Climbingpenguin Sat 27-Oct-12 09:34:56

Ideally DD's bedtime is 7:30 otherwise she tried to get up too early. Lately it has been 6:30 as she's a bit under the weather and tired. She has a gro clock and even though she mostly wakes before 6:30 (but generally after 6 atm) she largely stays in the room. We had a phase of 5am get ups which was related to needing a poo and then it being too close to get up time.

Does he still nap? As if he does then he'll probably need an hour less at night. 8:30 is quite late if he is still getting up really early and maybe you've fallen into the overtired trap. My old next door neighbours had a really late bedtime (seems common in the Asian families round here) but her eldest just started school and they adapted really quickly to the change in routine. Especially since she was so tired she was happy to go to bed a few hours earlier. DD still seems to have a body clock a bit shorter than 24 hours so we periodically find ourselves having to push her bedtime back.

DD did alright last night, a couple of wakings but I just put her in bed with me and she went off, albeit taking a bit longer than normal. She woke up announcing she was bigger and didn't need a dummy and then gorged herself on the chocolate the dummy fairy had left. I think we have a few more rough going's off though.

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Sat 27-Oct-12 10:12:05

MrsH I answered on your other thread (in sleep?), DD2 goes at 8h30/9 and wake up at 6. She is not a big sleeper and is happy all day, with or without a nap we are in transition. If we put her earlier she will wake up at 4 or 5am.
DD2 as started kindergarden in sept. all morning 8h30 till 14h, and we have to leave at 7h45 in the morning to get her sister on time for school, and she is completely fine with it all, so 7h is the latest we can get up. I never have had to wake her up she is usually our alarm clock grin.
I think your mother is wrong <well misguided, it is the old "rod for own back", which is mostly untrue with sleep and food>, if it works for you, stay with it. You can change the schedule quite easily once he goes to school if he needs it. DD1 has adapt very well to a lot of changes including sleep schedule.
I don't know many children who sleeps 12h at night it is nearer to 10h, they are all different though (quickly thinking I think it ranges from 8 till 14h shock in my immediate circle with under 5s).

If your DS is grumpy a lot, not hungry, over tired/excited at bed time... I would guess he needs more sleep though.

DD woke up at 7.20 yeah! (but went to bed past 9h blush)

Waves to rainbow
NK grin

Bearcrumble Sat 27-Oct-12 18:20:16

In case I don't get to read/post any more of the thread - I want to send big hugs to Scones. I like you, I really like all of you. I always worry that I'm too self absorbed and that I'm a bit of a gatecrasher as I joined the thread some time in postnatal rather than being her since the beginning. So I worry about being not liked too - if something good happens I worry that I am blowing my own trumpet as well. Terribly self conscious.

Climbingpenguin Sat 27-Oct-12 20:36:33

well i think it's fair to say most of us feel that way then. I had no idea you were a latish comer to the thread bc

I am quite proud of DH tonight, he had to put them down as it is my tutoring night. When DD started to talk about being sad regarding her dummy, he told her to tell her roo and other soft animals how she was feel (as he had to put DS down). It seemed to work (she talked for a while and then went to sleep with no crying) and not something I would have thought off. In fact I'm not really sure how to show her how to deal with negative emotions. I tend to just talk it through with her but that's not giving her tools at dealing with it herself.

Bearcrumble Sat 27-Oct-12 21:07:26

I guess I have a few 'pat' phrases that I use and ought to think about it more on a case by case basis.

Generally I say 'it's ok to feel sad. Just tell someone how you're feeling and they will be kind to you.' I try and name the emotion I think DS is feeling - usually 'frustrated' or 'cross'. The problem is when he is really stressed he goes non-verbal and just makes this (highly annoying) 'UUUH UUUH UUH' droning/crying sound that makes me feel a bit frustrated and cross myself though I try not to show it. It can go on for quite a long time too.

DH has gone out to see Muse for work. Both children are asleep. I just finished clearing the kitchen and doing a teeny tiny bit of ironing. It's only really the baby's dresses and blouses that I iron, I am a bit of a sucker for pretty baby clothes even though my head says 'cotton jersey all the way' I seem to have ended up with a few dinky little blouses and corduroy pinafore dresses somehow.

I think one of the issues with sleep is that I am loathe to give up that bit of the evening when they are both sound asleep - kind of 7-10ish as I feel I need it to unwind, watch an hour of telly, have a sherry etc etc. when really as her sleep gets so shit after midnight I should be catching my sleep where I can. Every night I say I will then I don't.

I said on fb about DH helping DS's keyworker to get a record dea. Obv. I am thrilled for Joel but feel very conflicted as I really don't want him to leave the nursery - he's such a nice bloke and it's so important for the boys to have male role models. There is another man too but all the other people inc the manager are female.

Right - my mum just rang and woke the baby. angry Have to go.

I'm very jealous of your husband envy. I love Muse but haven't been able to get to any recent gigs.

We saw the HV the other day for DS2 & she said 8:30 was far too late for DS2 to go to beg....it should be 7-7:30. Putting him to bed this late doesn't really work for us, he's overtired & cranky & we don't get to eat supper until after 9. Add in a 5 week old to that & hopefully you can understand the problems. However, we tried putting him to bed earlier last night & he woke up at 4am! However he wasn't feeling well so I hope it's not a regular occurrence, DH is dead against moving his bedtime at all so don't want this not to work.

NK2b1f2 Sat 27-Oct-12 22:54:14

dd2 is in bed between 6.30 and 7, followed by dd1 between 7 and 7.30. Not set in stone though... today was much later because we had dinner later after a day out and then allowed the girls to stay up reading bedtime books in front of the fire smile. Hoping for another lie in...
Oh, and dd2 has only started going to bed before 7 when she decided a lunchtime sleep was for babies hmm and she now gets very cranky by about 5pm.

Whiteworm Sun 28-Oct-12 01:57:21

Jesus havent been on MN for ages. (LittlebearH) IC you are pretty amazing. Now 2 DCs and still managing to post. I am only on FB. I am up late as i am drunk, DP in bed. Loving DD this age apart from the contrary issues. She wants to do everything herself. Has been potty trained since April but has suddenly started not telling CM when she needs a poo or a wee. CM thinks she is unsettled due to her best friend Finley starting school. She is now the 2nd eldest. Is evryone else ok?? I admit I am lost with names and what is going on so forgive me. I do want to say however a biig thank you to you all for being such a support and being generally normal lovely people. xx

Whiteworm Sun 28-Oct-12 02:18:39

Arrrgh I am so lost reading this thread. I am so confused at who is who etc. So I will offer some help with potty training. DD is 2 and 8 months and has been potty trained since 2 and 3 months. My tips: ( I am no expert) just put on big girls pants. Only pull ups for naps. Then they are called night time pants. After day 3 DD realised when to tell me she needed a wee or poo. My CM wanted 4 changes of clothes. I thought this was pessimistic. She of course was right. Dont go backwards. IC Rosie will do it. She is old enough now. Dont go back. Love to you all xx

rainbowweaver Sun 28-Oct-12 02:24:31

DD goes to bed anytime between 6pm to 10pm depending on how much she slept during the day. She's always good tempered though, but may get somewhat overexcited if we miss the 12 hours after waking up timing. And wakes up anytime between 5.30am to 10am depending on whether she wakes up at night and gap before she goes back to sleep. Absolutely refuses to nap if she can help it but may doze off in the car if she's very tired then wakes up very annoyed if she misses an outing as a result grin. She woke up at 5.30am this morning and as it was still dark I managed to convince her to go back to sleep, and we slept till 11am! Only the 2nd time that's happened mind, 1st time was a weekday and woke up at 10am. Normally she sleeps from 8pm to 7am.

Whiteworm Sun 28-Oct-12 02:29:13

Wow. Rainbowweaver wish I could be so laid back. If gone 07.30 I will wake DD up as I wont know where I am with lunch or tea!

rainbowweaver Sun 28-Oct-12 02:31:58

Ha, cross-posted ww and at 2am. What are the chances? I'm still up as not sleepy yet given slept till late yesterday.

rainbowweaver Sun 28-Oct-12 02:35:22

Off to bed now though, otherwise will be v tired as DD will be up early tmrw. Good night, and welcome back!

Bearcrumble Sun 28-Oct-12 08:08:21

Didn't have quite such a bad night last night. There was some horrible Trance music coming from the flats out the back, and I couldn't sleep until DH got home so somewhere around midnight - then baby woke a couple of times before 5 then DS needed a wee then he started making owl noises and I had to go in and ask him to be quiet. BUT he slept until 7 (the new 7, so like a normal 8am!!) and baby came in with me about 6 and I got to doze on and off. I know it sounds like an awful time, but I definitely got more sleep than the night before.

Taking them out today - probably to the Tate Modern.

Am a bit worried that my ergo is a fake - apparently there are quite a few around, and I bought mine on ebay 'gently used' and that's one way they sell the fakes without arousing suspicion. So annoying.

Bearcrumble Sun 28-Oct-12 08:10:24

<waves> to Whiteworm. How are you doing? How is work?

MrsHels My DS goes to bed around 7. If he's really tired a bit before or sometimes if I haven't got dinner together in time then 7.30 at the latest.

When he still napped for an hour or two in the day he used to go to bed at 8 or 8.30 - so he still sleeps the same amount as he did, just that it is consolidated in a single chunk now.

Bearcrumble Sun 28-Oct-12 08:10:53

He tends to rise between 6 and 7 in the morning.

Climbingpenguin Sun 28-Oct-12 13:10:19

<waves to whiteworm> bear smile

Thanks for all the potty training tips!

Those of you who didn't spot my FB update, DD confounded us by initially refusing to have anything to do with the potty, then sat on it and produced a poo - she was more surprised than any of us and initially wanted to get off when she felt the poo coming. DH persuaded her to stay put and voila! She was very proud of herself afterwards. That was it yesterday - nothing else apart from a pee in the bath.
Today she was ignoring the potty completely until I made her some chocolate milk (thanks CP!) and she decided to drink it while sitting on her potty - whereupon a wee was produced and earned her another button. So....we shall see how things progress...

Hi Mrshels - sleepwise, DD has lights out at 19.30. Sometimes she zonks straight out, other times she natters to herself for up to an hour and a half before she falls asleep. Left to herself, she usually wakes around 07.30. She naps for an hour or so at some point between 13.00 and 15.30. And mostly she sleeps through, unless she's ill or has a nightmare.

WW good to have you back!

Bc I remember you joining us - and I'm glad you did! I enjoy your posts enormously (as I enjoy everyone's).
Can you get a phone with a quiet ringtone or one you can turn off? So infuriating when you've got the baby off to sleep to then have a well-meaning friend or relative (or worse, someone trying to flog something) call and wake them up again.
Muse - cool! Saw them some years ago (touring the second album) - they were fantastic live.
How ace your DH got that guy a deal! I can sympathise with your mixed feelings, though.

Poor old DS has started his first cold - and I've got it too. Probably the same thing DD's had this last week. I'm hoping the chesty cough aspect won't affect DS as badly - it seems to have moved from my chest to my head pretty quickly and I'm hoping DS is getting plenty of antibodies in his milk so it won't be too serious for him too. We both got reasonable sleep last night, but he was very upset at lunchtime today. I suspect he may have a scratchy throat, so gave him a tiny bit of paracetamol, which settled him down again. Bah. DD only had two very minor sniffles in her first year, the first not until she was at least 5 months old. I suppose it's typical when there's a toddler roaming around bringing all the bugs back from playgroup....

NK2b1f2 Sun 28-Oct-12 21:11:28

IC sorry to confirm for you... Dd1 didn't have a cough until she was about 14 months and had few colds before then. Dd2 had loads of colds in her first year thanks to dd1. Guess a minor positive is that dd2 is very patient when she is ill because she's had plenty if experience.
Hope you all feel better soon!

Whiteworm - lovely to hear from you. I'm liking a lot of your fb posts grin. Sounds like things are going well for you. smile

NK2b1f2 Sun 28-Oct-12 22:24:58

Dd2 decided it was fun to jump up in the bath today, not realising I was leaning over her at the time. I now have a lovely lump on my cheekbone. If it turns into a black eye as I suspect I won't need a mask for Halloween [fgrin]

NK2b1f2 Sun 28-Oct-12 22:25:36

grin damn

Ouch, poor you NK!

I like the optimistic view of baby illness...!! DD is a right dramatist when she's ill - DS is already proving to be more stalwart.

Potty training is continuing well now - thank goodness! DD did 2 and a half wees in her potty. She flat refused the travel potty while we were out when indicating she was starting to need to go, but managed to hold on until she was home. She was in the middle of an unrelated tantrum when she suddenly got desperate and mid-meltdown, she leapt up and got herself on her potty. Apart from a few drops on the floor, she made it. What that told me is she does recognise when she needs to go now - even if it's a bit last minute!!

No poo at all yesterday, we shall see if she can muster one today.....

SconesForTea Mon 29-Oct-12 20:27:58

Evening all <hands round wine or brew>

Thank you all for your kind words, I appreciate it so much. I was having a real meltdown last week, precipitated by PMT I think but then my period arrived and my mood if anything got worse. Poor DH bore the brunt of it but I also cried down the phone to my mum, on my sister's shoulder in the street and when our neighbour, who is decorating for us, asked how I was I burst into tears then too. He was only being polite poor man. Maybe getting Gran's funeral out of the way helped <touches everything wooden in sight> but I feel so much better now. Having a small sherry <nods to bc> while DH does the weekly shop.

Both our DDs go to bed between 6.30 and 7pm. They are going at the same time as they share a room (well that is the plan, DD1 is getting out of bed and climbing into DD2's cot and there doesn't seem to be much we can do to stop her - even taking away her snuggly doesn't work - honestly she will drive me to drink <stares at her sherry>), but I think really DD2 would go at 6ish and DD1 at 7ish if we were following their natural rhythms. DD1 does have a daytime nap sometimes and we put her to bed at the same time anyway. I need my evenings. She will sometimes potter away like IC's DD for a while. They do tend to sleep 12ish hours if put to bed normal time, but if we put them to bed late they sleep less and get up normal time i.e. between 6.30 and 7.30. Why IS that? So frustrating.

Lots of get well vibes being sent to all the poorly LOs, and to you too PA and IC. Very bad luck on the house deposit PA. That sounds incredibly unfair.

Mous what is your French lesson, do you teach?

Survival so sad to hear that you lost your BF through her lack of empathy for your situation. While I hope I'd have never dropped a friend, I do remember my pre-children views on others' children and shudder. I was so judgemental. I hope you're really enjoying half term with your boys.

NK love your 7.44 lie-in grin Just the ticket the day before the clocks went back, eh?

bc I hope for your sake that DS' keyworker doesn't leave the nursery. Surely even with a record deal he won't have enough not to work straight away? <clueless about how it works obviously> How did the DCs enjoy Tate Modern? Did you go with friends? There is just no way I'd take my two somewhere like that on my own (anywhere other than a toddler group tbh). Well done you.

MrsH hello! I think you have joined us once before haven't you? Can I be really nosy and ask why your DH is against moving DS' bedtime? When DD1 wakes at stupid o'clock - anything before 6.30 - I tell her it is still nighttime and I don't let her get up. She has a gate on her room and can't get out though. Most people are probably horrified at that but it does work in that she knows there is no point trying to wander around, she can't, so she plays in her room.

rainbow ...... just speechless at your 11am lie-in. Wow. envy envy envy

Hi WW, good to see you on MN! grin

SB How are you these days, you were feeling down?

SR I hope it's all going well with you and particularly with DH.

Re potty training. We are at our wits' ends (again!) with DD1. She has been out of daytime nappies since June, only one wee accident that I can think of, but she WILL NOT poo in the potty or toilet. She will go in her knickers readily enough so she goes commando while at home, and she just holds it until we put her night nappy on, poos and then we change it. She still needs a night nappy IMO as it is pretty full in the morning. I guess I just don't care any more, I'm happy for her to do her poo in a nappy if that's what it takes for a quiet life (and one free of pooey knickers). It really bothers DH, perhaps because he is buying the nappies and he thinks he shouldn't be any more (he initiated potty training in the first place).

Tomorrow is my Bad Day (both girls all day with no groups) so I was determined to find a group, even if it meant morning and DD2 missing her nap. Forgot it was half term. Gah. But Wednesday is my birthday, and Mum is coming. Hurrah!

SconesForTea Mon 29-Oct-12 20:31:14

A question unrelated to LOs. I am having quite bad pain when I ovulate (I think). It's very like period pain and lasts about a day. I have never had this before, but I have the coil now, perhaps that has caused it (though I don't see how it can). Anyone else? It is very odd knowing when I am ovulating. And yesterday, before today's pain, DH asked if I was ovulating as he found me 'irresistible' (ignoring the backhanded complement there that I'm resistible the rest of the time). Strange.

StoneBaby Mon 29-Oct-12 20:53:32

Hi scones good to hear from you

I'm okay but sad we missed our ttc date ( due to extreme fatigue) I'm doing well and think that my meltdown kast month was due to a very long cycle (38 days) amd my hormones playing up. I'm still tired (and no I'm not pg - I've already tested) but it's part of the autumn season for me. Also I think that as I don't have enough work as I'm super efficient my brain is working too much and exhausting me grin

IC great news on the potty training. And I hope you all feel better soon

Wgen I picked up DS from nursery he was wearing a nappy! When I asked why I was told he had diarreha and not spare pants (I checjed and there're 2 in his spare bag) but the good news is that his key worker told me that if he did have any other episode he could clme tomorrow - and he didn't so no need to take a day off smile.

Ww nice to have you back even if you were still with us on fb grin

DS adapted very well tk the clock change. I do not!! Night all

StoneBaby Mon 29-Oct-12 20:55:38

Bummer I really need to proof read when I post from my phone

StoneBaby Mon 29-Oct-12 20:57:24

* last
** and
* to

Climbingpenguin Mon 29-Oct-12 21:59:02

I now had ovulation pain but no real period pain anymore (apparently they have swapped). No coil here and it is pretty painful and like you lasts a day. Now that I can recongise it and take painkillers straight away it is mostly alright. No more coiling up on the sofa anyway.

my half term has filled up with playdates. I'm quite impressed considering I only started booking them on friday.

DD woke over 6 times last night! but managed to not put her into my bed until 4am. I'm sure she'll adjust as she gets used to no dummy to immediately soothe her. Going off to sleep is fine. Today she announced that DS is her best friend.

Clock change has gone fine in terms of their sleep but they were getting a little cranky at normal bedtime. Scones when moving bedtimes I have found there to be a 4 day lag on their get up time. I also often force DS onto one nap as otherwise he'll be napping at playgroup.

went climbing tonight, which was good. Especially as I couldn't belay so just got to climb or rest. Really tired me out though so off to bed.

NK2b1f2 Mon 29-Oct-12 23:16:35

My Halloween face is developing well.. Dd2 bath time jump hit me right on the outer bit of my cheek bone which still sports a noticeable lump. I now have a lovely blue line running from my cheek bone to the bridge of my nose grin. Got a half price skeleton costume to go with it today.

Climbingpenguin Tue 30-Oct-12 07:50:29

I'm in shock, DD slept through and overslept until 6:55. DS only fed at 10, 1 and 5 and actually slept properly inbetween. He also slept until DD got up.

DS however sounds awful so illness will probably impact sleep soon. I will take the recovery night while I can smile

Climbingpenguin Tue 30-Oct-12 08:03:32

3:30 not 5, but still a good night.

Hoorah for a good night, CP!! About time! Maybe the dummy was affecting her sleep, so now she's getting used to not having it, her sleep will improve. Bad news that DS is poorly, though.

Scones good to have such a lovely detailed post from you! Sorry you're still feeling wibbly, but please keep talking to us about it. I reckon far too many mums don't share these feelings and I bet there are loads who find it hard. I've been lucky so far, but it's early days and I can already appreciate it that having more than one LO to look after is not easy at times....
No ovulation pain here - at least not so far! I'm going to get another Mirena put in soon, so I'll report back if anything occurs.

NK at least the face bruise came at the right season...!!

PT went well yesterday - all DD's wees landed in the potty and she was actually enjoying herself. She's just gone off to a gym session with DH - we'll see how she does there! Day Three No Poo however.....

Poor old DS woke up early this morning coughing, sneezing and snuffling madly AND had leaked through his nappy and baby gro into his sleeping bag. Bless him, he remained cheerful throughout, grinning with delight as I fished some of the gunk out of his nose (!) and once changed, he had a spluttery on/off feed (thank goodness my nips are healed, it would have been agony otherwise!) while trying to breathe, then quickly dozed off again. Which meant that it wasn't actually too bad a night in the end. I keep feeling like I'm somehow getting away with it and my luck's going to run out one of these days....

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Tue 30-Oct-12 10:17:27

CP good!

SB Scones I am tutoring a lovely teenager in french. It pays peanuts though and I am not having much luck finding more "clients" who fit in my time.

I am getting really stressed about our situation and I just want to curl up in a little ball. bear

NK grin good timing! sorry about it, though.

DD2 has started crying getting into school this week (she might be tired, time for an holiday/). She is also obsessed with painting! If we say no she goes behind our back and uses saliva instead of water hmm. She did 11 drawing yesterday and wanted to do more at bedtime confused.

I am getting frustrated with her speech. She does make an effort but I just can't understand, I know it is not her fault but I am fed up of guessing and tantrums/shrieking. Gaahh <bad mum>

<probable automn dip in mood>

ww and rainbow Impressed by your Xpost at 2 am <zzzzzz...waves>

ScienceRocks Tue 30-Oct-12 11:30:02

Hello everyone!

Struggling here - loads of work and not feeling very well - but will get there soon, I'm sure. Just wanted to say that I am reading and thinking of you all, but am not getting time to post.

My husband is reluctant to change bed time as he likes to play with DS1 for as long as possible when he gets home from work. We've been getting him to bed earlier this week but he has been waking up earlier <sigh>.

As for potty training, I don't think we're ready to start. Had upheaval enough with the new baby arriving & when we've tried pants he just wets them & doesn't even realise...

No point in rushing it if he and you aren't ready MrsHels!
Ugh on the early waking. Hangover from the clock change?

Bearcrumble Tue 30-Oct-12 20:13:35

My MIL came to stay yesterday, just an overnight visit but it was actually lovely.

I think we went on the wrong foot after FIL said that stuff about not wanting to stay at my mum's and I still have some reservations about him (he is an incredibly selfish man who hasn't been able to move past blaming his parents for all his ills) and also me being very PFB about DS and thinking she wanted to snatch him and make him hers when he was a baby (not really but kind of new mother mental hormones magnifying slight tendencies on her part - didn't help that he looks so much like DH). Anyway I was wrong and she is brilliant and DS loves her and she took him out twice which saved my life (nursery is on half term).

NK Ouch! Sorry about your face and hope bruises fade soon.

IC Thanks for your sweet comments. So sorry that the baby is poorly - hope he gets better soon. It's so pitiful when they can't suck for long because they can't breathe through their noses. Good news on potty training.

Mous Don't beat yourself up about feeling frustrated. It's natural to want to communicate. ((hugs)). Tantrums try us all.

CP Glad you got a better night. Mine was sort of ok - DD woke two or three times and we had quite a long stretch of sleep with her in with me. But DS woke some time between 5.30 and 5.50 and despite my calm and sweet attempts to get him to go back to sleep I failed. I knew that grumping at him wouldn't work so I tried being really nice and giving him everything he asked for (water, a wee and a story - of course he waited until I'd gone back to bed to ask for each one separately).

<waves> to Science, SB (sorry you missed your date - you have a bit of a window of more than 24 hours don't you? Especially if you do it before you ovulate as the sperm can live up to 5 days), WW and everyone else.

I didn't go to the Tate Modern in the end on Sun - I went to the V&A. Nightmare journey there, had to wait nearly half an hour for a train then the bus from Victoria was on diversion (I am tube phobic so have to rely on trains and buses although I do make an exception for the East London Line/Overground whatever it's called as the trains are big and modern and it's mostly overground) so it took about 2 hours to get there, then he wanted to put his feet in the pond/water jets in the courtyard and I had to drag him screaming away. He was in his new kickers and I was like - NO WELLIES, NO WATER.

DH did have a good time at Muse thanks but he was a bit put out that the neighbour he took didn't buy him a single drink while they were there. DH bought him one on arrival and obv. gave him his free plus 1 so we are a bit hmm. I'm embarrassed because I suggested him (he's the husband of one of my mum friends on the street). I don't think I can bring it up with my friend but I'd like to know what the he was thinking? It's just manners.

Sorry for mammoth essay.

<raises sherry to Scones>

Mous so sorry about your stressful situation. I wish I could magic your DH a job.....

Bc good to hear of the positive MIL experience!

Good news here - my cold has gone, thankfully - and apart from being a bit bunged up, DS seems to be on good form. I got the new snotsucker out today and I was vastly impressed with its efficient simplicity. I had the Dr Bee battery one before and although it worked pretty well, DD had meltdowns when I used it - I don't think she liked the noise apart from anything else. Well, I had to get a replacement after a friend I lent it to managed to lose various parts of it, so opted for a manual version. Used it today on DS (with a few drops of breast milk up the shnozz via syringe) and was suitably awed by how well it worked and how little it traumatised him. He's now breathing much more easily (and even better, is asleep....)

Climbingpenguin Tue 30-Oct-12 20:41:34

DD had no nap today. I blame sb or the fact she slept an hour later than normal this morning

mous sad I'm sorry but I've forgotten your general situation, but I hope things look up soon for you and have some hugs and chocolate in the meantime.

We also have the no wellies, no puddle rule as well as the no puddlesuit, no puddle jumping one. So far, she seems to respond really well to it, but i know it's a matter of time. I think the fact we do go out a few times puddle splashing in the week helps as she knows she will get her time.

MIL is also different when on her own, not as manic and more a real person. She also talks at a normal volume when on her own confused

good news is that although landlady made a lot of fuss about the property, she 'only' took 20 pounds more than the amount at which we said we wouldn't bother disputing. I still think we're paying a 100 over what is fair, but I can't be bothered and just relieved a good chuck of it is coming back.

stoofadoof Tue 30-Oct-12 21:41:59

boo… am going to make concerted effort to catch up properly…. i know i've been all about posting and running the last couple of times… CP i'll inbox you for FB.

more when I've caught up on the rest of this thread!

Climbingpenguin Wed 31-Oct-12 13:42:11

stoof have pm'd you back

DS had a even better night last night, feeds at 11 and 3:30. However I couldn't get till sleep until 1:30 and DD was up at 5:30. Managed to get an extra hour by waking DH (and so unfortunately DS) up at 6:30. Feel surprisingly OK and the it's the children's nursery afternoon so feet up now while I watch west wing.

CP hope you managed to catch up on some rest! Glad your ex-landlady didn't try and fleece you too badly, too.....

stoof hi! How are things? I hope the health situation is back on an even keel in your family.

I think it's fair to say that DD has totally cracked potty-using for pees - no accidents at all since the second day and she seems to be able to hold on if she needs to as well.
Poos, well apart from that lucky first strike on day one, the only other she's done (four days later - today) - was in her naptime nappy. I'm not overly surprised, knowing her poo-phobia I thought they might be a tougher issue to overcome. I've got a wrapped up present (late "Big Sister" present from my dad) sitting on a shelf for her to unwrap after her next potty-poo as an incentive (she knows it's there and it's in plain view...).
Meanwhile, we're now looking at phasing out the rewards for wees - initially by giving dwindling sized bits of chocolate buttons instead of the full sweet, then making it clear only poos will warrant a button. Anyone else who went down the reward route got any advice on that one? The other thing I'm thinking of doing is changing the wee reward from chocolate to a piece of fruit/something more healthy....
Also, what did the rest of you do when it came to removing the nappy for naps (those that still had naps at PT time!) and ultimately overnight? When did you do it? TIA...! smile

stoofadoof Wed 31-Oct-12 20:51:53

just a quicky cos I'm supposed to be writing a report for board i couldn't get done today…. IC first time round, PT DD when she was 2.10, she got wee's on day two, had always been irregular with poos, just used to encourage her to sit and squeeze and made an ENORMOUS fuss when she managed one… we waited a good couple of months after she'd cracked through the day before even thinking about night time. She was dry through the night in nappies for a few weeks, then after one bathtime, she said she didn't want to wear a nappy at night… and it worked… going to try with DS fri/sat/sun this week… he's been using potty for wees before bath for a few months… i suspect that he's not going to get it quite as quickly as his sis… if it's not looking good this weekend, will probs leave until christmas when i've got a week off work!!! (huzzah!)

Climbingpenguin Wed 31-Oct-12 20:56:00

you know IC it just kinda happened naturally. Think I went to not giving her one every time. They understand once it becomes more mundane, same as when they don't expect a round of applause every time they do a new thing.

Think I stopped the naptime nappy when I couldn't be bothered to put her in it. Just tried it and saw how it went, was only a couple/few weeks after.

We still have a night time nappy as figure why not. They are starting to become mostly dry but cost is quite low so I'm in no rush. We encourage her to use the toilet/potty late evening/early morning which I think she does mostly do.

Our hob has broken so we've having interesting dinners. Tonight's was quite tasty though. Mixed leaves (using up all our random bits of lettuce/spinach), cucumber, grape and balsamic vinegar salad with a jacket potato topped with a bean dip (cannellini beans, paprika, salt, pepper, small bit of garlic, olive oil, lemon juice all warmed in the microwave to help the garlic). Managed to get the consistency of the bean dip I was after.

remember one chocolate button isn't that much

Bearcrumble Wed 31-Oct-12 21:03:29

Alex just stopped asking for chocolate after a while as pooing in the loo or potty became a habit. A couple of times I said we didn't have any but I didn't stop for quite a while after it becoming established. I wouldn't think about phasing out the rewards just yet - your idea of gradually cutting down sounds good.

He also took longer to poo in the appropriate place than he did to wee. It used to upset me quite a bit because I didn't want to chuck the pants so I had to do picking/scraping and washing. Glad that is over for the most part but he did poo his pants randomly last Thurs. It was very wet so I think it too him by surprise. His plaintive cry of 'CLEAN. CLEEEAN" alerted me to what had happened. When we were training he used to run off and hide and shout "LEAVE ME" when he was going to poo so it kind of acted as a signal for me. He still says 'leave me' when he wants to have a poo on the loo.

Did anyone get any trick or treaters? We didn't this year. Got one lot last year. I bought a few mini haribo bags just in case, I quite like Haribo.

It's nursery half term - I'm only just realising how much I depend on it to have a breather when it's not there. I know three times 3 hours isn't a lot but it makes such a difference. Expecially it gives DD a chance to nap/have time with me one to one. She's not getting anywhere near enough daytime sleep but there's nothing I can do, she won't self settle and there's no way I will leave her to cry for more than 5 mins eg if I am showering or in the middle of cooking and even then she can see me even if I'm not attending to her.

She got about half an hour in the morning in my bed around 10 - when I fed her to sleep and laid her down with boob still in mouth and then detached myself and another half an hour at 4ish in the pram. She went to sleep this evening at 6.45 and is still asleep. DS cannot yet play alone and even if I explain I am taking her upstairs to settle her so we can have time together he hasn't got the impulse control to stay quiet or not follow me upstairs. Even favourite tv shows are no good. I don't really have a solution. Our house is so tiny and he also wakes her when he wakes in the morning. He's not a quiet boy.

We went to the park with him on foot and her in the pram at three and she didn't drop off until we were nearly on our doorstep - luckily a neighbour stopped to chat in the street and when I looked round at her she'd dropped off.

You know those phrases toddlers have? My favourite one of his at the moment is "It feels me better". I gave him some milk and a biscuit when we got back from the park and after he'd drunk it he did a big sigh and told me "that feels me better".

Bearcrumble Wed 31-Oct-12 21:07:08

Oh we did a little bit of Mr Poo Goes To Pooland - told him the poo wanted to go down the loo becuase his friends were there and it would make him happy. He kept asking 'is it happy'? every time he did one and I felt really mean telling him 'no' if he'd had an accident.

Aw "that feels me better..."!

Seems poos are generally a bit more of an effort from talking to RL mum friends too! Trouble with DD is she's unlikely to do them in her knickers, but will hold on...and hold on..and hold on, getting crankier and more distressed by the hour.

Today we knew she was desperate to go, but hanging on so in the end, DH held her on the potty in a firm cuddle, so she couldn't get up and kept telling her it was alright until she stopped protesting and finally let it out. Of course, she was very pleased with herself afterwards. Not an ideal way of doing it, but it had the desired effect and she was so relieved - physically and mentally - and much more cheerful for the rest of the day. Needless to say, she got her present.

Thanks for the thoughts on naps/nights/rewards etc, much appreciated! It's so great having the benefit of others' experiences.

In fact, DD has been generally delightful today - we took her to a friend's house and she did loads of unprompted "yes, please" and "no thanks" and generally co-operated with us. It was lovely for DH and I because these last three months or so have been extremely trying and spending time with DD when she's in a good mood and behaving helpfully is wonderful smile

Climbingpenguin Thu 01-Nov-12 21:22:03

<Tries and fails to remember DD's phrases> that is a cute one bc

we had a visitor the other day who texted me afterwards to ask me to look outside for the baby blanket she thought she had dropped there. I explained to DD what I was doing and she offered her blanket to the baby smile

seems like she has dropped her nap (I blame the dummy being given up). Just like that, three days of no nap.

I have realised that all DD's 'friends' (aka people her age) are female. It just seems to be the way the groups are, but think I want to try and change it a bit so am on the hunt for some male play friends before she thinks she should only play with girls. It is mostly girls at nursery too and I feel the staff encourage them playing with each other. Apparently there are two other girls and the three of them do most things together like go to the toilet. Her keyworker pointed out to me yesterday that DD is very independent grin She was also insistent that all the glue went on the paper before the glitter was allowed anywhere near it.

In me news, I didn't have to take any painkillers today smile smile. I can also do most movements with arm/back now. I also had a meeting at Cambridge university to discuss ideas for a fellowship application. I had a interview there a couple of months back and came second to a perfectly experienced candidate. They were very nice and said I had done well (but obviously answer was still a no) but said they would support a fellowship application as a way of me working there. Now I have the basics of an idea to work on so perhaps it might go somewhere. The main one I'm applying for is designed for mothers and offers flexibility. Main problem is it has a deadline of January and results in June/July for a start date of October so question will be do I apply for stuff in the meantime etc. It will require a lot of time (mostly as I can only do odd hours here and there) so worried about a lot of effort for no result.

SconesForTea Thu 01-Nov-12 22:38:42

My favourite DD1 phrase atm is "am are". Are you walking down the stairs DD1? Am are. Cute smile

rainbowweaver Fri 02-Nov-12 03:23:49

cp Cambridge will look very good on your CV though, and the work only needs to be put in till Jan after which it's just waiting. And whether or not you do find something in the meantime then at least this is still there and you can still decide what you want to do with it should it be successful.....

rainbowweaver Fri 02-Nov-12 03:34:40

Wondering how your LOs are doing with salad? DD will not touch raw salad leaves. Or vegetables generally now for that matter unless suitably marketed (DH managed to get her to eat a lot of broccoli the other day by calling them fairy trees). grin

rainbowweaver Fri 02-Nov-12 03:53:02

On PT poos, we did big girls poo on potty, only babies poo in nappy.

Bearcrumble Fri 02-Nov-12 07:53:58

rw - DS is being slightly fussier at the moment. He does still eat frozen peas and fine beans and raw carrot/cucumber sticks. He does have a couple of salad leaves when we have salad but he has gone right off lemon so no dressing for him.

'Fairy trees' is great.

I went out last night with 5 mum friends to the italian restaurant round the corner as two of them are turning 40 around now. One of them asked another mum if her next birthday was the big one and she replied "No, I'm 31". That was awkward. I knew she was younger than us and she looks it so God knows what the first one was thinking. She does have form for being a bit ditzy. She was the one who called the restaurant 'Pont De La Tour' 'Pomme De La Terre'.

CP Glad things are improving. Good luck on the fellowship application. I think it is worth the effort - would it be a three year one?

Oops bc...!!! Nice faux pas from your friend!

Another veg refusenik here, rainbow - DD eats potato in most forms, but other than that only has veg very occasionally (and not many at that! vegetable crisps, carrot and courgette muffins, once in a while a couple of petit pois...)

DD spent a day at her grandma's Montessori nursery today - and LOVED it. I suspect she would have enjoyed even if Grandma hadn't been there. I'll be checking out our local nurseries/pre-schools from next week.....

StoneBaby Sat 03-Nov-12 13:17:41

IC good to hear your DD enjoyed pre-school (even if it is MIL). Good luck finding one for her

CP how do you feel?

Today, I feel knakered and DS is full of life which tired me even more. This plus been hormonal is not fun

survival how are your DSs sleeping and feeling?

Climbingpenguin Sat 03-Nov-12 13:32:44

I'm good thanks. DH has got the latest cold worse than me. I'm going to try playing badminton tomorrow. Was mous (and science) ill? Haven't heard from NK in a while, hopefully half term hasn't swamped her.

That night I referenced has been the only night DD slept through. After going to her 8 times in two hours, I gave up and put her in my bed at 2am. I think she might be napping today but we went swimming.

DS also been too bunged up to sleep well, but that has been DH's realm and he won't let me take over.

SB is your hormonal cycle all weird again or is this normal part of relevant cycle.

IC I find it somewhat relieving that since you have had DS you've taken the same decisions the rest of us. I would love for DD to go to a Montessori, is it too far away to work as a regular thing? I keep meaning to buy a Montessori type book for house activity ideas.

stoof how are things with your DCs now. That was an awful run or illness, is it over?

StoneBaby Sat 03-Nov-12 20:18:03

CP glad to hear you're better.

My cycle js on track but my hormones seem to beall over angry

NK how are you?

Heh, didn't realise I was doing things differently..!! smile
Nursery was always on the cards, but I decided to leave it until we got the vouchers. We haven't got much spare money and I wanted DD to be properly resettled in new home/with new sibling - seems she is both!! Sadly, MIL's nursery is over an hour's drive away, so not do-able apart from the occasional VIP visit (!) There is a Montessori nursery closer which I will investigate, but there seem to be quite a few other good ones near us too, so I'll keep an open mind!

Boo to the crappy night for both your DC CP...and you, of course.

Sorry to hear you're tired too, SB.

DS is still being very fidgety/awoken because of the need to evacuate in the night - meaning one (or if I'm unlucky, two) nocturnal nappy changes, tummy massaging and a lot longer for resettling. These last few nights have been a bit wearing in that regard. I'm hoping his digestive system will hurry up and settle down - I think there's a good chance he'll sleep for longer stretches once he's not being disturbed by the need to pass wind etc..... <yawns>

Climbingpenguin Sat 03-Nov-12 20:40:05

there's been a few things IC smile

<gets back to pretending to know science>

StoneBaby Sat 03-Nov-12 20:49:16

CP I forgot to say - good luck for your application

IC hope the night goes better for you.

Off to bed as we've got an early start tomorrow with swimming. Hopefully the fireworks won't disturb our LO sleep.

NK2b1f2 Sat 03-Nov-12 22:00:52

<waves frantically> Hello, still here! Waved off my mum last night and the house has been strangely quiet. It was wonderful having her here for nearly two weeks and I wish she could have stayed longer (but felt too sorry for my dad on his own missing her). I think dd2 misunderstood slightly and thought 'Oma' had come to stay for good! She's been in a right mood today and not in the slightest interested in claiming her room back because as far as she is concerned it is Oma's room and Oma's bed. We are in no rush to move her from cotbed to single bed, so will take it at her pace and let her play on the bed, read books etc. before suggesting she might like to sleep there... smile.

BC Ooops... for your friend! I am terrible at estimating ages of people, so I keep my mouth firmly shut unless someone tells me their age and I think they look much much younger, in which case I tell them grin

CP Go for it!!! Go, go, go! smile And good luck.

IC Hope you get some sleep tonight! As far as toilet training is concerned, both mine have been quite similar but dd2 is much more fiercely independent. She likes to deal with things all by herself and does not need a nappy for naps (on those occasions when I make her nap!). She's also had dry nappies recently after night sleeps but as she is still in a cot bed I am in no rush to stop night nappies.

RW We are all vegetarian. My two won't touch salad leaves. dd1 likes things like grated carrot and apple as a salad, but dd2 is not so keen. I think it's quite unusual for toddlers to eat salad. Both of mine eat all cooked vegetables (give or take a few - they go through phases eg dd1 is not keen on mushrooms) but are not hugely tempted by raw vegetables. They are fine with all fruit though. If anything, dh is more fussy than the girls!

NK2b1f2 Sat 03-Nov-12 22:33:32

Awwww, small warm cuddly baby girl (well, 2 year old) on my lap on the sofa in front of the fire. Treasuring the moment. She woke up upset because Oma left!

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Sun 04-Nov-12 06:09:40

I am better CP thanks, it was just a virus.

NK awww! I had DD2 sleeping on me last afternoon, nice and warm <very cute she looks exactly like the klimt baby here.

iC no nap nappies here straight away as DD2 just drop (or not) like a puppy anywhere any time (yesterday on DH's back coming home from the park grin). I did put one to DD1 because I did put her down for a nap but by 2.8 she had already drop her naps completely. DD2 is also almost always dry in the morning, and would sometime wake up t o ask for the potty in the middle of the night/early morning. <wish she would wait a bit>

RW DD1 would eat a bit of salad (especially chicory) if you mean green leaves, DD2 not, but I have the contrary of NK not big fans of cooked vegetable, except soups. If you mean raw then DD1 will eat almost anything and DD2 cucumber and carrot. She might sucks the juice of tomatoes and spit the rest hmm

BC oops! I have a friends in her mid 20s, who was going on and on about older mothers and how tough it must be/bad for the children.... I told her to be careful because I was probably older than the woman she was talking about, she went shock blush. grin

SB science hugs
Stoof waves

On cute "talking" DD2 copied DH at the table and said "ta too mama poo coo" with a big grin [melting emoticon] <thanks you mama for cooking>

NK2b1f2 Sun 04-Nov-12 09:46:24

mous I thought one mother at dd1's school was the child's grandmother.... blush Thankfully never said a word! She's not much older than me but hasn't aged well.

Climbingpenguin Sun 04-Nov-12 09:49:26

DD doesn't really eat vegetables or salad, then again she doesn't really eat dinner.

fellowship would be up to five years so pretty great but has a 4% success rate. I'm still not clear what on exactly my research idea is so I have to spend some time just reading the literature. I am hoping to get it done by christmas with a rough draft by start of December. I think I will need to get DH to take some mornings or afternoons off work just until I get a proper outline.

I try to stay away age and accent questions.

DD does ask us 'what is [this] something for me' when she see's new things grin We're trying to explain that not everything is for her.

Good luck with the fellowship application CP!!

Aw NK and DD2 (and all of you) missing Oma!

Love the talking, Mous! Good to hear you're better.

We think DD might have a UTI. Potty use suddenly went out the window today - wees on the floor, getting up while still going, needing lots of smallish wees, clutching her groin..... I'm going to get a sample out of her and take her to the doctor tomorrow if this continues this afternoon.

Meanwhile, DS had a two-hour nap this morning and is now asleep again - bless him!! I remember the effort it took to get DD to take a 40min nap - long naps were virtually unheard of until we started walking her for miles in the buggy....

Climbingpenguin Sun 04-Nov-12 14:42:01

DD had that IC, gets lots of fluid into her and it should clear up soon. We had to put her back into nappies for the day. I know from lots of experience how much fluid intake can make a big difference.

Climbingpenguin Sun 04-Nov-12 16:17:30

ps hope she feels better soon

stoofadoof Sun 04-Nov-12 20:38:20

oh dear IC hope DD's ok

glad to hear others improving

RW ours both eat sticks of salady things (cucumber, carrot, peppers) but not leaf. Like NK's two ours have periods of eating everything and nothing..really frustrating at times… the only dead cert ever with both of them is olives… DD won't eat onion… refuses point-blank and can spot onion in something at 100 paces… I think it must be a texture thing, rather than a taste thing as for years now I've been grating onion for anything I'd usually use onion in… DD found out about this a couple of months ago when she helped me make macaroni cheese and I told her all about my secret ingredient! Could have gone either way, but fortunately she liked that she'd been eating onion all this time without knowing it!

CP good luck with the application! Both the DC's are much improved ta - DD just about back to normal… DS not fully discharged from the hospital yet - his immune system absolutely shot sad he's had slapped cheek for a few weeks, just seemed to be getting over that and he's got gammy eyes today… assume that might turn into full blown conjunctivitis in the next few days, but hope not!

i'm going to tootle off now and look for kids pro-biotics on t'internet, desperate to try and rebuild his immune system, so any bright ideas on that front welcome!

(am on countdown btw - 5 days at work and then i've got a week off and we've got 4 nights at centreparcs smile smile smile smile ) (yes, the one 20 minutes from home!!! smile) can't wait…

have to say, it's rather nice to be back with you all smile

stoofadoof Sun 04-Nov-12 20:40:50

btw ditched the attempt to get DS out of nappies this weekend - he's deffo under the weather, nose streaming, temperature etc etc… probs leave it til christmas now which is when i've next got more than two days off work (aside from cparcs, but I don't think hols is the best time to start!)

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Mon 05-Nov-12 05:29:50

Stoof sad I have had a lot of thing for DD1 because her immune system was completely shot after chicken pox (still is a bit after 4 years). I need to check the ages on them and I will be back to you.
Hope he will settle soon.

StoneBaby Mon 05-Nov-12 10:48:33

DS does eat most veg either cooked or raw but he will not eat salad leaves.

stoof glad to have you back and fx your DS will get better

IC how is your DD today?

Over last week, DS woke up 3 times with a dry nappy in the morning so the chocolate bribe promesse is back in action. He doesn't wear a nappy at nap time since July (when he became PT).

I'm home today with the leftover of a migraine which stricked me yesterday afternoon. DH did the nursery run this morning with a screamin/upset DS who didn't understand that maman was staying home.

I think DS cutest phrase at the moment is 'cuddle' he normally runs to us with his arms opened to give us a cuddle smile

Thanks for the good wishes! DD seemed a bit better today, although still clutching her groin a lot and very reluctant to use the potty. Took her to the GP and she doesn't have symptoms of anything serious (thought not!), but I'm taking a sample to be checked. I have a feeling it might be more psychological than physical - for some reason, DD's gone off using the potty again rather than because of discomfort. I managed to persuade her to use the potty (hence the sample now procured!) at lunchtime, so we shall see...

stoof your poor DC.... Lots of live yoghurt? Onion is itself a probiotic, isn't it? And any members of the alium (sp?) family. Omega 3? (Coconut products are a good source if oily fish isn't an option!).

SB hope you're feeling better today.

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Mon 05-Nov-12 18:46:05

stoof I agree with IC onion, garlic, yogurts (yokult or actimel type too), add rose-hip, propolis, honey, echinea (add zinc but not sure about giving oysters to toddlers confused), lots of berries, sharon fruits, physalis, goji berries, both DDs are a bit sensitive to citrus and kiwi fruits but those are good too if no problems

We had bio-strath drops for DD1 (which helped with allergies and recurrent viruses) can be use from 3 months but our source is in danemark not sure you can get it in the UK.
When having Antibio we have had some bags of probiotics from the pharmacy. (dicoflor or similar...)
DD1 is on orthomol junior now but I don't think it is suitable for younger children (it has to be followed by a medic and BTH it is not very efficient and very expensive <feel like I have been had hmm>

IC DD2 had that too but it was just a change of situation, it is drier down there without a nappy. Also if you are using pink (or orange?) toilet paper or wet wipe it can be very irritating. FX it is just that and not a infection.

SB hope you got rest today

IC good luck with the application

FYI don't play "I spot with my little eye" with DD1 (7). She had her siste,r who was not there, as an A, logical answer "but I can see her clearly in my head" hmm...

Ha ha to the "I Spy..." twist Mous!!

Just plain white loo roll here, but that's worth bearing in mind.
Two more potty wees from DD this afternoon - the first was done entirely off her own bat just after we got back from a trip out. She just took off her knickers and got straight down to business, I only knew what she'd done when she came and announced to me that she'd done a wee in her potty (I was getting DS out of the buggy). The second required more cajoling.

I have a feeling it's the poo issue that's causing the problem. DD needs a poo and is nervous about sitting down for wees because of her fear of doing a poo. <sigh>

stoofadoof Mon 05-Nov-12 20:55:26

ooh mous and IC thanks… have wondered about getting some pro-biotics for kids but they're massively expensive… will have another look and get some more unusal fruits into him too!

IC I have a vague recollection that with DD we put her a nappy on to help her poo when she was showing signs of needing one, but got her to sit on the potty (or at least near it to start with) whilst she did her poo… after a while we put the nappy in the potty, then got rid of it altogether…

for a while (after she was PT but before being out of nappies overnight) she would regularly have a poo an hour or so after dropping off to sleep - I guess as soon as her body started to relax...

NK2b1f2 Mon 05-Nov-12 21:31:40

Stoof Someone I know swears by manuka honey (15+) to ward off and treat almost anything. I was so convinced I bought some! It's quite expensive (I found it at Tesco for about 14 pounds a jar) but a little goes a long way!
Hope your ds gets better soon, poor little thing.

NK2b1f2 Tue 06-Nov-12 14:26:12

Small rant alert... I am increasingly disillusioned with dd2's nursery which has been under new management for the past few months. Among other things, a few nice staff members have quietly disappeared, the toys are thinning out, there are suddenly few books... dd2 puts on her serious face to go in, and comes out serious looking - I don't think she is hugely unhappy or is treated badly, but the feel of the whole place has changed a lot from lovely homely to odd. The latest 'incident' was a note to say the children should come to nursery in fancy dress for Halloween. dd2 was very excited about what I assumed was a Halloween party (my fault to think that...). Only to find the staff were not dressed up when I dropped dd2 off, there were no decorations of any sort, and when I picked her up she told me in a matter of fact way 'Mama, there was no Halloween party today.' Her key worker looked quite uncomfortable and said they hadn't started the party yet (unlikely, it was past 4 and most children had gone home - so why lie to me?). I felt so awful for dd2 who waited all day for maybe a decorated cupcake and a silly song (that's a party as far as she is concerned, so not exactly high expectations). angrysad

On the plus side, dd2 has a place to join dd1's school nursery class the day after she turns 3, so I will have to grin and bear it until then. I've already decided to reduce her days until then to two days and somehow work around it, and give her a long Christmas break.

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Tue 06-Nov-12 15:04:44

SB You can't train children out of night nappies, you can put your chocolate buttons back in the cupboard. Medic get concerned after 7 yo.
It is a complex mix of hormone's production, bladder's size and central nervous system's maturity.
You need at least a week of completely dry nappies in the morning (be careful with pampers and the like, they look dry when they aren't), and be ready for accidents to happen for a few years.

NK pants!

Climbingpenguin Tue 06-Nov-12 15:07:54

our vegusto order has just arrived, vegan protein stuff that is also soy free.

Oh dear, big regression with the PT. DD seems to have developed a phobia about doing wees in the potty as well as poos (which she is phobic about doing full-stop - including in her nappies, stoof). She won't sit on it without enormous persuasion - today I got her to do one wee after a lot of encouragement. Second time I could see she was desperate, but nothing would get her on the potty and she wet herself. Which may have made the situation worse, because she hates being wet, so she's not keen on Big Girl Knickers now either.

I'm seriously thinking of returning to nappies for the time being and trying again when DD indicates she wants to. No infection, her sample was clear. It's just a psychological block.

Such a shame as for a couple of days or so, she really seemed to have got it.
<frustrated sigh>

StoneBaby Tue 06-Nov-12 18:27:00

IC what about putting her in pullups? It may help the transition between nappies and big girls pants? 'They' say that there is a step back after a few good days so it maybe just that...

mous I know he's probably not ready but he is so pleased when he's dry in the morning that it is worth a try

DH is off to Amsterdam for a 3 days 'business'-trip tomorrow. As a result he got DS to promise to be a good boy with me. fx it works. Thanksfully it's during the week so I won't be single-handed (apologies to all who spend days with their LOs by themsleves) for full days.

NK2b1f2 Tue 06-Nov-12 20:30:47

IC Can you try to skip the potty? Dd1 never warmed to it and went straight on to the big loo. She didn't even want the insert.

DD wears pull-ups when she's in a nappy quite often - doesn't seem to make much difference! And she's even less keen on the idea of using the loo at the moment.

She's been funny about doing poos for months now - she's a fastidious creature and odd things trigger fearful reactions.

I think the situation was getting too pressured, so that's why I've decided to back off for now and leave it for a bit. I'm hoping she will volunteer to try again herself before too long, but we shall see.

She's clearly bright enough to understand what's expected of her - and can do it - but something is upsetting her about the process, hence the urine retention as well as the fecal retention. I'd rather she peed and pooed in her nappy than hung on to both for long enough to distress herself!

Climbingpenguin Tue 06-Nov-12 21:14:37

I agree IC if it's causing her stress (especially with the feed back loop of stressed parents) than back off for a while. There's no rush and they're not even three yet.

StoneBaby Tue 06-Nov-12 21:33:14

IC good call. It'll come to her sooner rhan yiu think and the holding is not the best for an adult let alone for a 2 yo. smile

StoneBaby Tue 06-Nov-12 21:50:16

NK forgot to say. The new owner of your DD2 nursery seems rather odd Hopefully you can manage the new hours for the next 3 months. I too would be hmm confused about them

SconesForTea Wed 07-Nov-12 15:19:07

IC I agree to back off for a while. That's what I've decided with DD1's poo-phobia, she asks for a nappy and I provide it (a cheaper no.4 size of her sister's in fact!), she does the business and off it comes. For whatever reason, she REFUSES to use the potty or toilet so I'm not going to push it for now. The stress levels are markedly less already.

It doesn't matter! They will all get there in their own time.

NK what a shame about your nursery. That is very odd about the Halloween non-party. At least you don't have long to wait until you can transfer her, the next few months will fly by. It's nearly Christmas already... [head in sand emoticon]

DD1 still cries often (about half the time) at drop-off to nursery, but seems to be having a whale of a time when I pick her up. On Monday I hung back and watched her interact with one of the workers who was being really loving and playful with her, like a GP would, and she was giggling away, it warmed my heart. I am SURE she does like it really, although she insists she doesn't.

I think I probably have the most veg-phobic child, she eats cucumber with gusto and most fruit but other than that, tomatoes occasionally and that's it. Oh yesterday she ate uncooked frozen peas straight from the freezer but that's a first. I have to remind myself that I didn't really eat any vegetables apart from raw carrots until I was a teenager. I don't know what we'd do if we were vege confused

SB good luck with your home alone duties! I have done full days this week, up to and including bedtime, as DH is working late. It hasn't driven me to despair which is good. I am guffawing at your DS promising to DH that he'll behave for you. DD1 promises all the time to behave and it makes not a jot of difference. She naughties away.

stoof great to hear from you. You really have been in the wars, you thoroughly deserve your holiday, I hope you have a really relaxing (with children? hmm) and enjoyable time.

CP how are you feeling? Your fellowship application sounds amazing. I seem to have a complete mental block when I think of my 'career'. I am intending to apply for standard office/admin jobs at minimum wage (in this part of the country) and I am a chartered accountant. All the accy jobs round here are FT though. and I'm not sure I could do them as I have forgotten it all

Mous, what's going on with your situation at the mo? Fab that DD2's speech is coming along so nicely.

<waves to survival, SR and anyone else lurking>

We had DD2's first birthday party on her birthday, on Sunday. Phew it was hectic, we have a lot of family between us (well mine mostly) and quite a few friends with babies the same age so we had a real houseful. We worked like dogs to get the house presentable as we're still in the middle of decorating. It all went off well, but that is me partied out for a LONG TIME. Much, much nicer to be a guest and be the one accepting cups of tea not making them.....!

Sugar it's time to collect DD1 from nursery! Bad Mother alert

StoneBaby Wed 07-Nov-12 18:32:29

scones DS promises and if he starts playing up I remind him what he promised daddy and he behaves again. It's so useful!

Thanks for the support everyone! Today was much less stressful, although DD twice removed her nappy. First time, she said she wanted to do a wee in her potty (actually, I think she'd just done one in her nappy) but as soon as she felt like she might do a poo, she got worried again and wanted her nappy back. The nappy removal is frustrating, but at least we didn't have the tension levels of the last few days.

NK that nursery does sound rather odd....!

Scones I'm impressed with the cucumber and tomato-eating!! The only reliable piece of vegetable-type matter DD will eat is potato. That said, she's now getting a bit more adventurous and is at least trying things, even if she's not eating them. It's a step in the right direction.

Argh, DD's got another cold - less than a week after the last one cleared up. Meh. I'm hoping this one will remain a head cold and depart swiftly - the coughing and poorlyness that came with the last one wasn't much fun. Still, at least I'm armed with the Benilyn this time!

stoofadoof Wed 07-Nov-12 22:18:14

quick hello to mark my place!

DS HAS got conjunctivitis… operation immune system re-build underway with a vengeance! DH took him to docs yest - lovely new GP who had called the haematologist (sp?!) to review last lot of bloods to reassure us further…

panicing a little - DD having her first ever bday party on 25th… sent invites out at school yesterday…. only one reply <gulp> I figure I don't always reply immediately, needing to check what's on etc etc…. but still…

5 sleeps til hols grin

2 crazy busy days at work sad

NK IC sad

CP off to google vegusto!

not so much of a quick hello then!

Climbingpenguin Thu 08-Nov-12 21:54:31

DH has man flu and is highly annoying

DD and DS are ill still ill?

DD still waking several times a night, but sleeps really settled once in bed with me. Actually DS while ill and cranky in the day is sleeping more settled and feeding 3-4 hours at night so is alright.

I meanwhile am fine, despite a cold. Going to attempt a run tomorrow. Was going to go yesterday but whacked my knee on a door. I have A LOT of background reading to do <wibble>. DH is supposed to be off work tomorrow afternoon (like he was today) but doubt he will up to anything. I swear if he is off ill tomorrow morning he will be made to reschedule his holiday. Had hoped to do some more tonight but had to do all the housework. Did sneak off to McDonalds earlier for some coffee and reading time, even found a highlighter DH had stashed away grin

Anyone else ever wonder if their DHs make themselves more ill than they need to be? You'd think he had what I had a few weeks ago. <Goes off muttering but accepts I shouldn't get annoyed every time he is ill> He is just so annoying with it though.

Climbingpenguin Thu 08-Nov-12 21:56:13

nk what other nursery provision is around?

oh, took DD to tumbletots today, she had a great time and think I will sign up for it. She likes the vegan cheese but was unimpressed with the spicy sausage. Although I did realise afterwards she was complaining of her mouth hurting so don't think it was the spice in hindsight. Already been up to her 6 times tonight sad and I still have a shower to do.

Bearcrumble Fri 09-Nov-12 08:17:31

I think DS may have worms. Not sure. He seems generally sprightly but has been recently complaining of itchy bum, his appetite is down and he's gone really picky about food and his stools are quite loose and pale. Also he has had a persistant crackly cough for months - not all the time but quite often I hear it when he's in bed. I'm not sure - I have checked his bum and looked at poo when he's done it in the potty and no evidence as yet. Actually the complaints of itching are less than they were.

I am less sure about the Calmer, Easier, Happier Parenting book the more I read it - she advocates giving the child something other than it wants when it expresses a preference eg. the red one over the blue one just so they learn they don't always get what they want. I find that needless and a bit cruel. I still think think throughs, descriptive praise, special time and explaining what is expected are great though.

nk - would def ask the new owner about what happened on halloween. We had to buy loads of horrible biscuits and chocolate coated apples the kids had made from ours - money raised went towards a new pram shed.

Bearcrumble Fri 09-Nov-12 09:02:19

CP Yes, I think my DH complains more than is warranted when he is ill. He also takes to drinking a lot of whisky whenever he has a cold which I think is self indulgent and probably doesn't help and also makes me dubious about how ill he actually is. I couldn't touch booze if I were that ill. Then he moans for weeks about all the work he has to make up that he fell behind on when he was unwell. He stll sits in front of laptop all day during ill periods but apparently having a cold makes hiim a lot slower (not the whisky, no).

Have any of you read The Diary of a Provincial Lady by EM Delafield? Pre-war but still very pertininent (and funny) about what it is like with small children and a typical husband.

LeMousquetaireAnonyme Fri 09-Nov-12 09:20:23

CP BC, the term man flu hasn't been invented out of nothing!!! Typical male behaviour, DH says he is more sensitive to be able to react more quickly when attacked by a mammoth or a sabretooth tiger

BC I did read it but prechildren so a long time ago I am sure I would understand it more now.

DD2 has croup but it is falling on her chest and she has horrible gunk coming out of her nose now. I might have to go back to the doc...

stoofadoof Fri 09-Nov-12 19:31:58

oh dear… more poorly people sad poor DC's and croup is horrid! BC our two can get itchy bums when they eat anything spicy…. often goes with a soft stool too ;-) but I imagine you've already ruled that out!

DH has been complaining of being ill for weeks and weeks now… but soldiering on. I think we all just probably need a break! (speaking of which, only 3 sleeps til centerparcs smile smile smile smile ) I get furious with him cos he doesn't seem to do anything to help himself feel better (like eating better, going to bed earlier, exercising etc) just seems to wallow in it….

happy friday night!!

SurvivalOfTheUnfittest Fri 09-Nov-12 20:07:12

Hi all. I'm babysitting at a friend's house this evening and have her computer to myself (and the tv remote control!!) so I'm able to catch up with you all without a)working; b) trying to sound like I'm actually listening to DH or c) dealing with jobs/night terrors or any other disturbance - bliss!!

IC It will be interesting to see what result comes back from the sample - could be a phobia but may have come as a result of DD having a urine infection too. The only way I picked up DS2's the other week was by the smell of his night nappy. DS1 decided himself when he wanted to be in pants and that worked well. She obviously knows what is expected, and agree there is no need to hurry. Hey, you've got enough on your plate at the moment!! I sometimes used to ask DS2 if he wanted pants or a pull up in the early days - that seemed to work too.

NK rubbish news about the nursery. We've also faced some changes in the last few months as the manager has gone on maternity leave. This week they tried to tell me that DS2 faced a new key worker and one that we know he doesn't like. Luckily, I arranged a meeting with the acting manager and politely requested that he go to one of several other girls instead(on the grounds that he just hasn't gelled with the other one). She has agreed and we are very relieved! It's so important that you are happy and confident in the childcare isn't it? When things aren't going well, it just increases the mummy guilt in my experience.

Stoof hope you have a lovely holiday. Sounds like you've really been through it and I hloope the DC continue to get better soon. I think internet multivitamins are the way to go when they are really needed (but the price can be monstrous).

SB DS1 is still in nappies at night at 4 years and 7 months. They're starting to get lighter but he has my type of bladder that doesn't empty in one go, so I think it will take us a while longer yet to get him dry. DS2, meanwhile, no longer has an infection and is having to retrain himslef to get to the potty in time now that he doesn't get a pain sensation when he's about to go. The same happened with DS1 at a similar age so I know it's a phase, but, really, 5 pairs of pants/trousers a day is getting a bit dull!!

In fact, DS2 is generally being a PITA - lots of screaming/angry shouting/poking/rough play in the day and back to waking us for up to 2 hours(and other regular wakings) in the night needing comfort (having been back in his room about a week). I'm already at 'crying tired'...

I'm also fighting the school over DS1 having a hot meal. The county caterers will only cook a gluten and dairy free meal for him if I pay the £1.95 that every parent pays and also provide all the ingredients that they need. In addition, the only suggestion for pudding is fruit, which will not fatten up my famine-victim sized 4 year old. Also, I feel that it isn't fair that he can't choose anything but fruit while they have all sorts of stodgy cakes/puddings. Either I have to abandon the plan, suck it up and send in all the stuff (including a homemade pudding) or make a formal complaint to the LA (have tried just emailing the top lady already). Sometimes this simple problem, which is so insignificant compared to those that my work families face, is very wearing and overwhelming. Sorry, sad and 'too-tired-to rant' rant over...

CP Good luck with your application - sounds very exciting (and slightly out of my league blush)Hope your lot are better soon. My DH seems to think that he must take to bed on the rare occasions he is ill, even if I am ill too and am left with both boys!! He likes to resurface every now and then to share the germs and/or show how poorly he is! I find it irritating too, but DH thinks I'm just crap at being sympathetic, having not received much as a child (or since) myself. Mous hope DD2 gets well soon too.

I'm sure there was more that I wanted to add in response but my brain is fast switching off (and I don't want to set myself a new record for the longest post!!) Hope you all have a good weekend. Dh and I actually have some time to go Chrostmas shopping tomorrow without the boys (thanks to the in-laws). Maybe we should just sit in a cafe all day and snore quietly in the corner? smile

SurvivalOfTheUnfittest Fri 09-Nov-12 20:09:22

p.s. BC DS1 had worms found during his colonoscopy last Christmas (I do know how to spell it really!) and we had no signs of anything in poo or from an itchy bottom. If he's itching, I'd treat you all anyway (as we have done recently), but I wouldn't say that all of those symptoms are from worms so best to keep an eye on him anyway.

Bearcrumble Fri 09-Nov-12 21:23:36

I've checked the breastfeeding network leaflet about worm medication and it says that it should be fine even though not licenced for bf mums. The thing is you have to then keep your house scrupulously clean for the next 6 weeks to prevent re-infection from eggs lying about. I don't know if I could do that. I think I would go insane.

I am a bit worried about the hacking cough though - it has been going on for at least 2 months.

We had a horrible, horrible day today - constant whinging or crying or lying down in the street. Demanding treats/biscuits/juice and refusing his meals. I told him (calmly) that dinner would be finished at 5.30 and told him for the last 10 mins "You have 9 minutes to eat", "there's 8 mins left for dinner then I take it away" - he had 1 fine bean, a chunk of bread and 2 bites of pizza. The rest went in the bin. Of his packed lunch the only thing eaten was half a small cheese sandwich and a smoothie. Breakfast he ate about 10 grapes and none of the toast he asked for. He has never been fussy about food before - I don't get it.

Maybe because he sees me spoon feeding DD? (she has mainly stuff she can pick up but sometimes when I don't have anything appropriate I give her a pouch). Tonight she had fine beans and pizza crust so she had what we had and didn't get special attention.

It has been so horrible today, I have disliked being with him for a lot of it. Really had to cajole the odd smile/laugh out of him. I can't stand it.

SurvivalOfTheUnfittest Fri 09-Nov-12 21:40:12

Oh BC that sounds like a really horrible day. It's amazing how they can be lovely one day and horrid the next isn't it? DS2 was great yesterday and awful today. Maybe he is sickening for something, which might explain the lack of eating and behaviour. I hope tomorrow is better, or you at least have more back up.
On the worms front, I haven't really tried to keep our house any cleaner than usual and figure it's better to have an initial blitz on the worms than not treat at all.
Maybe time for a trip to the doctor about the cough?
Wishing you a good night and a much better day tomorrow.

Bearcrumble Fri 09-Nov-12 21:56:58

Thanks and you - hope you get a good night too. Off to bed now, meant to go an hour ago... x

Climbingpenguin Sat 10-Nov-12 09:52:19

Two very unhappy children sad

Oh rubbish Bc - what a trying day. Sorry to hear about your problems bethy - the food thing sounds incredibly frustrating - and the night waking very tough, no wonder you're crying tired...

DD's sample came back clear so it IS a psychological thing, as I suspected. I've started a thread on it in Behaviour/Development to canvas for other ideas on how to deal with it.

I had worms as a child Bc - don't recall any special house-cleaning being needed though......

Gotta go...

And sad CP....

StoneBaby Sat 10-Nov-12 16:05:30

CP sad what's happening?

survival fx you can sort the lunch problems. How is your DS2 night terrors going?

SR every thing okay for you?

DS has a cold too which starts to be chesty... He is good but looking to push the boundaries every day. DH is back from his trip with a cold manflu

I've started the xmas cake decorations with DS (pix on fb). I also bought some Pixar Cars 2nd hand from a local fb selling page - they'll be great stocking fillers. We bought DS his main present - a micro scooter - thanks for the suggestions

Sending lot of get well spirit smile

stoofadoof Sat 10-Nov-12 21:06:15

brief moment of outright stomach churning full scale panic tonight at bedtime… took DS nappy off and there was just mucus… smelling exactly like after he stopped passing blood with the e.coli… back in control again now, found the perspective, sure it's all fine… but still…

it does sound rather like everyone's got a lot on at the moment sad

StoneBaby Sat 10-Nov-12 21:10:38

stoof fx it all goes fine. And breath...

We went out tonight with DS as DH fancy going out fir a steak. DS acted very well and entertained himself with the car he had as a reward for his good week. We were back home by 7.30pm and he happily went to bed blush

SurvivalOfTheUnfittest Sat 10-Nov-12 21:13:03

Glad the sample was clear IC.
What's up CP?
Gosh Stoof that must have taken you right back... We get mucus from our two, but that's not saying a lot given their digestive issues I'm afraid.
DS2 actually slept through the night!! He has a tendancy to give me a break for a night just when I reach the point of putting him on ebay!!
DH and I have had a lovely day shopping on our own. I've bought some material to sew the boys some Christmas sacks and I'm feeling very enthusiastic. Now all I have to do is remember how to use a sewing machine (especially as I've borrowed MIL's and can't risk breaking it!!)
SB we seem to fend off the night terrors as long as we 'runkle' him at about 9:30p.m. (This means give him a bit of a shake/move around in our house!!)
BC how was today?

Climbingpenguin Sat 10-Nov-12 21:22:47

just the illness, it's dragging on forever. DD is in a lot of pain with her mouth and today just being more tired and grouchy than ever. To be fair DS was better, although he did sleep lots today. Then again I had DH round to give him undivided attention during his naps and rock him as required. DS is also only feeding twice a night at the moment, which is great as DD is requiring so much input.

I was one of those impatient mums today dragging DD round some shops and being a bit huffy with her blush She's fighting sleep, so even though she needs some naps while she is ill, she gets very upset about it all. Bit disappointed I took it out on her (had tried to put her down and after too much time and shouting I took her out instead) and couldn't quite shake my mood. While she is tired and hurting she has a habbit of throwing/hitting things including at DS.

DH was off yesterday but he will reschedule. He has another interview for that London job he turned down on Wed (it was readvertised in the end with a higher salary). We're still doubtful the conditions will match tbh especially as we won't consider moving so chances of salary meeting commuting costs are low. That's if he gets it of course.

stoof hope it's nothing

SF here's to another good night <hopeful> and the sewing machine is always better once you're doing it in my very limited experience

stoofadoof Sat 10-Nov-12 22:05:55

SB smile

CP i've been a cowbag all day - foul temper, ragingly cross and I'm not sure why… i've been a shouty grotty grump and i'm not proud…

two gulp and sniff moments from DS today (prior to the full scale panic, which though it's subsided is preventing me from having a glass of wine!)

1) came belting into house, grabbed tea-towel from pile under sink and ran back into garden… next seen holding arms aloft at bottom of the big fir tree with tea towel spread between them, calling for cat and trying to encourage her to jump into his tea-towel, saying 'me rescue, me rescue'

2) he lost a magnetic letter down side of fridge and couldn't reach… I used the broom handle to grab it and he beamed at me and said 'mummy magic'

yep… even less proud of my shouty grotty grumpiness…

i'm off to bed, hoping to sleep the sleep of the carefree… yeah right

(still, it's my turn for the lie-in tomorrow…. which means of course it'll be the one day in the fortnight when I can't get back to sleep after 6am, however hard I try smile)

night all x

ScienceRocks Sat 10-Nov-12 23:08:52

stoof it'll also be the day they sleep until 9am if you are on the lie in angry

Seems to be a lot of poorliness around, hope everyone gets better soon. bear I don't want to be alarmist but do get your ds's cough checked out. My dd1 did the same and had asthma. It's been wonderfully under control since diagnosed and three years in, she appears to be growing out of it but I had many nights sitting with her in bed coughing before we got there sad

Climbingpenguin Sun 11-Nov-12 20:43:07

Had a odd moment with DD earlier.

We were doing her new puzzle when DH took DS up to bed. Part way through the second time, she announced she didn't like her lion and then cried that she didn't want the lion looking at her after initially laughing blush I found something to cover the lion up with. She was quite tired tbf but was taken back with the idea of not wanting to be looked at.

StoneBaby Mon 12-Nov-12 10:14:29

CP DS doesn't want to see birds either real or in books. I don't understand this neither confused

Oh blimey, DD has quite a few neuroses of the types you mention, CP and SB - there's a puzzle she refuses to do because she doesn't like the horse in it. And there are certain Charlie and Lola episodes she won't watch because of representations of animals.

Yesterday she was terrified of a talking Woody doll a friend of ours had - I had to cuddle her while she sobbed with pure fear.

Still, on the plus side, she managed to do two non-traumatic poos yesterday and today. Dare I hope we're entering a new more relaxed phase of defecation...?! Meanwhile, I've ordered a few books to hopefully help her feel more positive about doing a poo, let's hope they do the trick and the withholding comes to an end soon.

Here's hoping all the poorly LOs get better soon. DD's a little bit sniffly, but otherwise we're having a respite from illness for the moment.
<clubs MN jinx>
Long may it last.....

Bearcrumble Mon 12-Nov-12 21:01:20

Good news on the poos, IC.

DS has had a few things recently he's said are scary that DH and I can't see why - the noise his toy fire engine makes (not very loud and he's had it for ages and never been scared of it before) and a book but I can't remember what it but I know it wasn't scary in any way, shape or form.

And the night wakings where he wakes up yelling for one of his toys that's right next to him. Also shouting that he's wet when he isn't but won't believe me so I have to change his pyjamas before he'll go back to sleep.

Science Thanks for tip. I will make an appointment at the GPs. It seems worse at night and if he is upset so it might be I suppose. DH's brother was quite bad with it as a child and oddly my mum developed asthma when she was in her 40s but neither of us has ever suffered.

Bearcrumble Tue 13-Nov-12 18:16:54

People keep asking about DD's name on baby names. I thought it was classic but different, seems I wasn't the only one. Really hoping it doesn't take off as much as eg Evie/Iris/Olivia - would be annoying.

I have found a great way to get DS out of a crying fit/tantrum - find a small animal toy and make it talk to me then tell him what it says. Could be anything, today he cried because I broke his meringue so I got a little pink robot bear to come and smash it up more and say 'smash smash' in a robot voice. He thought it was funny and stopped showing off immediately. I don't know if there is any similar advice in Playful Parenting cos I haven't read it yet but I assume it is the sort of thing it would advocate.

Sounds like you've hit on a good technique there, Bc! I'm sure Mr Cohen would give it the thumbs up!

Climbingpenguin Tue 13-Nov-12 20:53:38

DD completely took me by surprise today. We said telly all done as otherwise no time for stories. She then asked us if she just had two stories could she watch one more grin

(sorry, know just been doing me posts but energy severely lacking)

BabyGiraffes Tue 13-Nov-12 22:17:30

We are just generally plodding on here.... Still have issues with the nursery eg. dd2 needed the loo before we left today and there was neither soap nor paper towels for the children to use angry (now also supplemented by learning that dd2's best friend is leaving, too, because the parents aren't happy). I've reduced days to two a week from now (inofficially, will just keep her home one day) and officially from December, and will then give notice in December for dd2 to leave at the end of January. She had two hours play in her new school nursery class on Saturday (open day, I only went to drop off dd1 who volunteered to help and didn't mean to stay) and I haven't seen her so happy and animated for ages! I can't wait for February because my mummy guilt will be much reduced knowing she's having a ball in nursery rather than just tolerating it and waiting for me to collect her sad

CP grin Clever little thing!

BabyGiraffes Wed 14-Nov-12 07:39:22

Pyjama day in nursery and dd2 is totally refusing. She's appalled at the thought of going out in her pyjamas because they mean you have to go to bed and sleep... She's very particular about things being just right, so I offered her a top and leggings that look a bit like pyjamas instead smile. I think she's a little young to get the idea behind charity days.

Climbingpenguin Wed 14-Nov-12 13:53:32

nursery situation sounds horrid, must be very emotionally draining on you sad

I'm supposed to be working...

<heads off in direction of the kitchen>

Climbingpenguin Wed 14-Nov-12 13:53:52

<wonders if i should just grab my camera and go for a walk in the country park>

Sympathy on the nursery situation, BG (nice to have that name back again!)

I've just been to see a pre-school near us as a possibility for DD - needless to say, DD strolled in as if she owned the place and started helping herself to the toys. They seemed very nice and it was a huge space with a not-too-big group of happy children suitably occupied. It's mornings only, but that's okay (especially if DD keeps her afternoon nap going! She didn't sleep today, but usually she does). DH and I were going to wait until we got the government hours at Easter, but now we're thinking we'll send her early if we can scrape the dosh together as she would probably get a lot out of it. Might help with her various neuroses too!

The thought of a couple of mornings a week with DS only is making me swoon...!

StoneBaby Wed 14-Nov-12 21:24:51

IC good that you found a pre-school you and dd enjoy. Fx you can find the cash

BG how is your dd2 doing?

I'm on the edge of applying for a new job which is far better wages but (and it's a big but) the woman to contact is so busy she hasn't been able to see me (or call me) so I don't even know which FT hours they expect me to do! Still need to finish mu application (will probably write it at work) and decide if I post it or not. The + is that it is still for the States which means I keep all my leaves and allowance (ie maternity leave) the - is the not knowing if they're happy with my hours (8am to 3.30pm with 30mn lunch).

Sorry very me post today

Waves to all. I hope the unwell LO and parents are feeling better x

BabyGiraffes Wed 14-Nov-12 21:28:19

I feel a bit more myself again IC grin

I've had a bit of a trying day today... Dental appointment for a minor filling replacement went wrong when my dentist did a precautionary xray and discovered a rather larger problem needing urgent(ish - appt Jan!) attention. It's going to be £££ <sigh> Then when I had just got in my car to go to work I got a call from nursery saying dd2 wasn't herself and had just projectile vomited everywhere, and could I maybe please pick her up immediately. So I scrapped my work plans and collected a very poorly, very pale, very quiet child. She lay on the sofa all afternoon either snoozing or watching Charlie and Lola, bless her. dh has taken a day's leave tomorrow to stay home with her.
Oh, and it's got to be three things going wrong, right? Our washing machine has packed up again... Serves us right for getting cheap carbon brush replacements rather than the actual brand ones sad. I guess it's worth repairing one more time although part of me thinks, sod it, just order a new one.

BabyGiraffes Wed 14-Nov-12 21:33:17

SB x post. Sounds promising and worth applying for smile. I am also keeping my eyes open for something closer to home. The commuting is getting more difficult to manage esp with ever rising fuel prices. We have two ancient cars. One is a diesel and very economical on the motorway, but the heating doesn't work (nor does the radio volume control, but I can live with that). The other is petrol and not very powerful, costs a fortune to drive the mileage I am doing, but the heating works.... confused

rainbowweaver Thu 15-Nov-12 00:14:39

Poor you bg sad that sounds an amazingly trying day!

Been lurking again the past couple of weeks as I've had to travel last week and have been very busy at work this week. Wanted to say thanks for all the feedback on vege / salad eating from everyone. I'm very envy with the raw carrots and cucumber eaters.

On the potty side, a thought if you're shelving for a bit ic. We talked DD through what she would do when she was ready to wee on potty, a bit like the athletes visualising what they would do before they did whatever they had to do it. Then leave it up to her to decide when she is ready to wee and poo on potty. That's how she practiced pooing on the toilet before we removed the nappy permanently. She thought she would try it first and told us she wanted to give it a go. She sat a couple of times when she wanted to poo, so by the time she said she only wanted to wear big girl pants she'd practiced pooing and weeing a few times. Also each time she'd wee or poo in her nappy we'd just mention to her that when she's older and ready she will wee/poo in potty.

rainbowweaver Thu 15-Nov-12 00:16:29

Like the lateral thinking cp!

Sounds interesting, SB!

Argh, NOT a good day BG, hope DD2 is on the mend today. Our second hand (last year's model) reconditioned Bosch washing machine was £150 - not too bad! Can you pick up a pre-loved item somewhere in Cardiff? (If not, I can recommend the Bristol shop!)

rainbow sounds like a good approach! I think we need to help DD break her poo phobia full stop - she doesn't like doing them in her nappy either, it's not just a problem with doing them in the potty/toilet. Yesterday she pooed in her nappy without a trauma, which is the third in a row without drama - it's a good sign, I think.

Meanwhile, the poo books arrived today: Where's My Potty? Everybody Poos and Uh-oh, Gotta Go - DD instantly entranced by them and has had all three read to her several times over already. We'll see if they'll help her continue to be more relaxed about the whole business of doing her business!!

Climbingpenguin Thu 15-Nov-12 14:21:56

I think DD is on the mend, two wakings the night before and only one last night (even if it was a while and still resulted in bed sharing).

DS is also doing better and only woke twice last night and actually only fed once at 5am! The 11pm waking was swiftly dealt with by DH.

DD is currently doing a long nap... on her floor <eek> at that usually means she has a wet accident but it won't be on the soakable mat under her sheet. Took her back to tumbletots today and signed her up. I feel guilty about not taking her to the park enough and teaching her climbing etc. so this is a nice way to do it in a warm environment where DS isn't crawling around wet grass.

BabyGiraffes Thu 15-Nov-12 21:11:16

dd2 was absolutely fine today so I think her sickness was a one off. Hehehe, glad she kept it to nursery so I don't have to steam clean any carpets... I do have a suspicion that they don't actually give her vegetarian food, but can't prove it. Her sudden projectile vomiting may have something to do with it because she is not used to digesting meat. She seemed rather pleased that she couldn't go to nursery today because she was sick yesterday - hope madam doesn't get ideas!
dh was home with her today (he volunteered immediately - think he fancied a duvet day) and they had a lovely time.

Waves to everyone, hope the poorly dc are on the mend.

I saw my first fully kitted out house today: fake Christmas tree with all decorations, fake snow on the window, lights outside shock

BabyGiraffes Fri 16-Nov-12 11:41:42

I have to be more careful when I write because dd2 seems to read over my shoulder and makes a point of contradicting me. She's just insisted on eating lambs lettuce!!

BabyGiraffes Fri 16-Nov-12 11:45:03

... and potato salad! Two new things today!! shock