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Dec 08 Mums - still biffing on

(974 Posts)
LadyThompson Wed 11-Jul-12 22:49:17

Yes, yes, it's a bit lame. I wanted to say: "Still fucking on!" but wary of causing offence....

I know 'biffing' is a bit PG Wodehouse, as well. You'll just have to humour me grin

McKayz Wed 11-Jul-12 23:01:36

Beans will be thinking of you and your dad. I've got everything crossed for you xxx

sybilfaulty Wed 11-Jul-12 23:18:20

Thanks for the thread, Lady T

Thinking of you for tomorrow Beans.

Kayz - you are doing a brill job. Every feed gets easier. Hang on in there.

sybilfaulty Wed 11-Jul-12 23:19:41

Sorry, darling, I don't mean to sound like I am forcing you, more than I am an enthusiastic cheerleader, for all the time you want to be cheered on. As soon as you want to stop, I'll cheer for that too.

NIght, night XXXX

DeidreBarlow Thu 12-Jul-12 07:31:16

beans Will be thinking of you today x

JamInMyWellies Thu 12-Jul-12 09:15:12

marking my spot.

Beans fingers crossed. x

McKayz Thu 12-Jul-12 09:54:51

Wooo!! She's now 10lb 5oz. So she has put on 1lb 5oz in 2 weeks. HV is very happy with her and me. There's still a touch of jaundice but HV said that's normal with BF babies sometimes. I think I need to realise now that it's not all going to go wrong like it did with DS2.

KiwiPanda Thu 12-Jul-12 10:29:53

Kayz You are clearly producing double cream not milk, that's brilliant!! Well done you grin

Beans also thinking of you today. Also hope you aren't too knackered x

Beans36 Thu 12-Jul-12 10:41:38

Thanks everyone. Despite my upbeat ness a couple of days ago, am struggling a bit! Finding out later if it's spread to his arm as well as the re-growth in his leg. Will let you know.

Well done teeny Kayz!

X

LadyThompson Thu 12-Jul-12 11:17:44

Cor, Kayz, that sounds great! Well done. I don't like HVs either, never met one I rated (though I imagine they do exist....somewhere....)

I am only doing a quick catch up as I am rushing around trying to pack stuff up as I am ramming in a quick visit to my Mum's for a couple of days. Can't wait.

Beans - so hoping for encouraging news. Thrilled to hear he is making the most of his time - I feel strongly that we should ALL do that, anyway...because every day IS a blessing! Very glad to hear you feel so positive about your move. Although I still miss London endlessly, I feel upbeat about my village too. Shhh, don't tell anyone I said that grin If we could just get the fricking house in order.

Talking of which - Indith, a loft conversion sounds brilliant. Jealous! Our house is already on three floors so we have no loft to convert (or store anything in). I know you are a phonics fan, have you seen the interesting discussion about it between that Education Minister and Michael Rosen? It's in discussions of the day. Of course, I am fuming that if DD1 can already read when she goes to school, phonics will still be compulsory as there is a mandatory, nationwide test. Boils my piss, as DP likes to say grin

Sybs, those boots sound gorge but DD2 is a 4 and DD1 is a 7.5 now, so by winter the small ones would be too small. But thanks for the offer, hope someone has them.

Rubes - that's quite a shocker about your DH doing Bristol/Brighton within that rotation! How are you feeling about the whole house shenanigans now?

KP - are you all better now? And your DS, DB? Caught up with Gordon last night - still with DP pausing it grin Sigh.

Vag - my BMI is 24.8 at the mo. I am not officially overweight, which is a big milestone for me, but as you say the BMI is of limited use, especially when people are fit and muscly like you (and not like me!)

Oh cripes, is THAT THE TIME?

McKayz Thu 12-Jul-12 11:51:04

Beans, thinking of you lovely. Xx

Hello,
Slinking in on the new thread, wondering if you'll have me back?
I realise keeping track on Facebook just isn't cutting it, so i'm going to bleddy well make time to come on here again.
On holiday in France right now with T's 'best' friend. Lots of angst and trauma amongst adults and children. We've had cars in ditches, people being sectioned, children waking every hour, every night. Thank god for wine and cheese. And knowing we're coming home on Sunday.

Lady I'm afraid as I skim-read the page, I interpreted your post as "my vag is 24.8 at the mo". Which I thought was maybe TMI, but you seemed quite pleased, so good for you grin.

Kayz that is just great about the weight gain, and you sound like you're doing brilliantly in difficult circumstances. Loving the FB pix too.

BEans am v sorry to read the news about your dad, and am thinking of you.

LadyThompson Thu 12-Jul-12 12:10:46

Spot! grin I think you need to Drink More Wine. And here's me thinking it was the Fitflops that have changed the way I walk....!

VagolaJahooli Thu 12-Jul-12 12:37:15

Hahahaaaa peeing my pants at ladyT's vaginal dimensions!

Beans thinking of you, I know white light can't change any results but I'm sending it to let you in lieu of a cuddle and a cup of tea. It's not really funny, but I read ominous as omnibus and was quite confused that you might be waiting for some East Enders marathon.

Spot who got sectioned, I think we are going to need some more information. If you want to stay on this thread you must entertain us with your holiday disaster.

Kayz good on you, but continued boo to that evil MW who has made this whole period so difficult for you. You are doing beautifully but your self doubt has been obvious and it is all down to her. You must believe in your own awesome-ness by now.

Poor DS1 it is his first week of holidays and he is sick with sky high temps. Last night he was having hallucinations that things were getting him, and when DH or I tried to sooth him he'd tell us to stop screaming at him. He seems a little better this afternoon.

I have a 1km open water race at our local beach this afternoon. Hoping the north sea behaves herself and isn't too choppy.

McKayz Thu 12-Jul-12 12:51:16

Spot, I am with Vag we need details when you get home.

Vag, I'm getting there. Knowing she's put on weight is brilliant. She weighs now what DS2 weighed when he was born, though she looks smaller and longer.

Indith Thu 12-Jul-12 13:42:30

Oh dear. I've just been thread reading and tittering at the misreading of Lady T's vag size and thinking I needed to remember to congratulate baby Kayz on her weight gain and managed to type a lovely sentence congratulating Vag on putting on so much weight grin.

So anyway.

Well done Kayz smile

Beans your dad sounds really wonderful. He sounds like a fabulous dad and grandfather and a very strong, positive individual. I hope that he can continue to enjoy the time he has and when, sadly, his day comes may he slip away surrounded by all the love that shines through his family.

Spot that sounds like an "interesting" holiday. We definitely need mor details!

Lady T the loft is actually already converted but we have been splitting it from one large room with an ensuite that never happened which dh had been using as a teeny tiny office (previous owners, not us) to a large room open to the stairs for office and sofa bed with a small single room for dd and all her crap. Eventually she will move up there and the boys will share.

I've read some of the phonica debate. Really though it all comes down to providing each child with what they need as an individual. Unfortunately that just isn't going to happen in most schools. I think phonics is good. It really is and it will help even the best of readers on some level.

Ds knew all the basic sounds before school but the concept of blending hadn't clicked. Blending came with the old style word recognition Biff and Chip books which start off with just the names then simple sentences. All of a sudden he realised what individual words were and once he got that he could put all the sounds he knew together and he was off. That school used the old books was therefore great for us as he wasn't being held back at all. Where a school uses only fully decodable phonics books a child who knows all their sounds can be held back by pnly being given books that cover the sounds done so far in class. Not that that should happen of course but you can bet your boots it does happen. We still used phonics cards a bit at home for the more complicated bits and I still do love the read write inc cards for that, ds really "gets" them so if he is struggling a bit with "ure" (sure, picture) or all the "ough" words and so on we can get the cards out and the pictures and phrases help.

Dd is still at messing around stage, she likes to mess around with the cards and with the jolly phonics work books. She knows a lot of sounds but gets muddled. She is great at hearing sounds and thinking up other words with the same sounds and can break down a word orally. She gets blending orally but hasn't quite linked it with words on a page. I think phonics suits her.

I don't think children who can already read having to do phonics is all bad so long as they are given freedom to develop their reading at their own pace. Not all of the time spent on phonics is repeating the sound, it also gives them the chance to spend lots of time with one letter/sound writing it correctly and exploring it, finding other words with the same sound, rhyming and so on.

Today started all sunny and bright but it has ot very dark and threatening sad school summer fair today. I am obsessively watching out the window to go grab my washing.

Dd is counting my toes hmm.

KiwiPanda Thu 12-Jul-12 15:08:46

Sybs if you've not yet had any takers 7.5 might be perfect for DD1, she's 6.5 at the moment so by winter....?!

Rubena Thu 12-Jul-12 15:38:35

Beans, hoping like mad for great news for your familyx

I was thinking it could have been temperature down there and some new way of helping with conception - then again our Lady doesn't need help there grin

More details please Spot hmm

Fabulous news Kayz smile remember though, FF isn't everyone's first choice but it also can be a lifesaver for some. As Lady once said, it aint crack, but so pleased the BF is working out - noice job.

Good luck Vag! Hope DS1 feels better too - I've had to collect ds from nursery last week with similar. He's OK but hoping dd doesn't wind up with it.

Lady, they aren't on his rotation, he def stays on the rotation and to the next place in Oct, but during the next year he does his fellowship and they are often 6 months each. Good one at Bristol he wants and good one on the Sth Coast, but it isn't for sure. He'd weekly commute probably to Bristol if he did do that one, like he did for a few months to Devon before we moved there. The house thing has worked out sort of, for now.... The LL has admitted it was a viewing but claims he didn't realize at the time (he's 84 but I'm still not convinced) however we both called him on his plans but he had already apparently pulled it off the market, and said we can make an offer privately whenever it suits which works well as I dreaded moving again. This house isn't everyone's cup of tea, but it reminds me of houses back home so I like it a lot. I'm still occasionally in the fitflops too but mainly as I haven't bought a replacement yet and my other thongs (flip flops) broke. I actually haven't posted a video on FB of ds riding his bike as my Fit Flops are shown and I didn't want Jam to tease me blush Just kidding Jam! Have a nice time at your Mums!

Speaking of which, hi Jam, crikey could have brought back the sun!

Just got back from dd's swimming lesson and she wanted a biscuit told her I have to do a wee first, then she ran off shouting "I do wee I do wee" hmm I found her on the other toilet fully clothed saying "I do wee need toilet paper" and half the roll on the floor shock Please let this one be easier to train that DS - starting off promising (not that I'm even remotely close to starting her!) It was funny though. DS didn't even talk at her age!

Need some birthday present idea's for DD - ds suggests she have a trampoline, but DH not keen so that's off the list, and I'm stumped.

VagolaJahooli Thu 12-Jul-12 15:53:34

Indith, I agree. A year ago I was right up for waiting until they are older to start reading, as they do here, and making sure they are read to loads to engender a love of books. However, the downside of waiting is that if there is a problem with learning to read, it is quite late to pick it up and try to resolve it. Here they start to read at 6 and that is fine, but I'm truely shocked at how fast they expect them to go from novice to advanced reader. DS1 certainly doesn't have any learning difficulties, but learning to read in two languages is difficult and his biggest issue is the sound of letter combinations. OU in English sounds very different in Dutch, and V often is pronounced the same as F, depending on the region. They teach kids to spell out words here, and that is fine, but I'm thinking of going back to phonics for his English reading. At the moment in English he us up to the slightly more advanced chip & biff books, the magic key ones, but at school they are reading books of about 50 words per page with a couple of pictures. He started reading just before Christmas last year. Luckily for us, he actually loves a challenge and doesn't see it as too hard, but more something he will eventually conquer but a dutch friend's son is having trouble and being well and truely left behind, the upshot is that he hates reading and writing. Surely that outcome is what they should be trying to avoid as much as dodgy literacy levels. What is the point of everyone being able to read, if no ones wants to. Anyway basically with all that ramble, I think both late and early beginning of reading have positives & negatives. I think phonics are necessary for early readers as not all will be advanced and phonics helps form words, where spelling is a challenge. I can see Lady's point and that is were trying to work with kids on an individual basis would help, but with class sizes as they are would this is difficult.

VagolaJahooli Thu 12-Jul-12 15:57:47

Crikey, should have reviewed that, some terrible grammar in that, I swear I am capable of teaching my son to reid & rit propa blush

VagolaJahooli Thu 12-Jul-12 16:09:32

Hello Rubes, cross posted, glad it settled down with the house. I find that sort of stuff quite annoyingly stressful. I'm intrigued as to what the house looks like this

VagolaJahooli Thu 12-Jul-12 16:11:39
Rubena Thu 12-Jul-12 17:28:28

Vag - yeah it was stressful mainly as DH has a lot on his plate and it wouldve meant moving a week after exam part 1. I couldn't open those links? Bit scared to as well grin I just mean it's more open plan rather than how English houses are individual rooms. We lived in a Victorian before here and as lovely a house that it was, I was desperate to knock down about 3 walls grin
Starting to feel all achey - I really don't want what ds had.
I know what you mean all about the starting school thing - I had a tour of one school (by a couple of 7 year olds which was funny) and I got a bit sad thinking about ds leaving all his friends as the nursery is a bit away in terms of what schools the kids will all go to. He's a lready a little distressed that his BF goes off to school this Sept. He face planted this afternoon as well as his other friend wasn't at nursery today sad

JamInMyWellies Thu 12-Jul-12 17:38:37

OH for cocks sake.

Brief straw poll, do you allow your children to occasionally walk along a wall when you are out and about?

Do you think it is a terrible act to allow children to walk along a wall or occasionally wander into a front garden when out and about.

Age of child 3.

sybilfaulty Thu 12-Jul-12 17:40:49

We do walking on walls if the wall belongs to the council / church etc. Not on people's houses.

Kiwi, PM me your address and I'll post you the shoes.

Beans hope all is well XXXX

Great weight gain, Kayz .

JamInMyWellies Thu 12-Jul-12 17:51:47

hmm maybe I am being a little unreasonable then.

DS2 wandered into a neighbours front garden today while on our way to school. While I was chatting with another neighbour. He knocked one of her flowers. As soon as she told me I obviously immediately apologised and made DS2 apologise too.

But according to DH I perpetuate that sort of behaviour by allowing DS2 to walk along one particular wall in the village (even though the owner of the property has said its no prob).

DH of course never ever walked along any walls or went into a neighbours garden ever!

Am I the only person as a child to ever have walked along walls not belonging to my parents property. I thought it was a right of passage to scale walls/trees etc.

McKayz Thu 12-Jul-12 17:51:56

Same as Sybs here. I won't let them walk on walls if they are part of someone's house/garden.

McKayz Thu 12-Jul-12 17:52:55

X-post. If they've said it's ok then that is different.

Rubena Thu 12-Jul-12 18:10:39

Nah, I wouldn't allow that, or crossing into someone's garden etc. if one guy says it's ok, problem is ds see's a wall as a wall, and probably doesn't understand why he can walk along Mr Smiths but not Mr Browns wall.

JamInMyWellies Thu 12-Jul-12 18:22:29

Bugger does that mean I am going to have to apologise to DH and tell him he is right?!?

KiwiPanda Thu 12-Jul-12 19:21:16

Sybs fantastic thanks so much! Will message you now

Jam No idea on the etiquette of wall walking I'm afraid. DD is far too much of a total wimp sensible little thing to walk on walls. Getting her to walk at all is the challenge.

God I am knackered. Random insomnia at 3am is not a good combo with a 5am baby and 5.30am toddler. Did a run this morning too, across my lovely local park that has been reduced to mudbath by the bloody Wimbledon queuing hordes [grumpy local face]. At least the Olympic tennis going folk won't be queing ..

Talking of which has anyone who has tickets been getting those increasingly sinister texts and emails? Talk about sucking all the joy out of the events. It's like something out of 1984... Except without the security, obviously wink

Beans36 Thu 12-Jul-12 19:48:04

Just to let you know that Dad's scan was ok. The cancer hasn't spread to his arm, it's just arthritis. Not nice, but not lethal, luckily! He has got a fairly busy tumour in his leg and they're going to start radiotherapy on it a week on Monday for a week, so fingers crossed that'll blitz it for a while!
Gosh, been waiting for those results and they didnt come in til 6.30! Torture.

We don't really have any walls to walk on. I try not to let them walk into peoples' gardens, but it's not the end of the world if they do and I call them out pretty fast.

Why??

traceface Thu 12-Jul-12 20:09:27

Hi Ladies.
Thanks for the new thread LadyT
First (because I read it last) - jam yes I strugle to keep her off walls, posts, or anything that's climbable. There aren't many garden walls near us but she will happily start to wander down any drive that looks appealing and I have to call her back or go and retreive her. Why what has happened? I don't think it's a terrible act and it's only because they're so inquisitive.
This will be a terrible catch up because I've missed so much again. Sorry.
But Lady - congrats on the vaginal dimensions grin That did make me laugh! Beans how did your dad get on?
Kayz - Wow on dd's weight gain! You sound like you are doing a most wonderful job. We should call you *Kayz the Amazing smile
I'm impressed (and a bit disheartened if I'm honest) by all the super fit speedy runners. I am very slow and still find it quite a struggle some days. My 5k time is about 33 mins - not far off kiwi's 10k time blush I have a long way to go to reach my half marathon - and not much time to do it in. I find it hard to find a time when a) I am not at work, b) I've not got children with me, c) I've have not eaten within the last few hours, d) I'm not hungry and e) there isn't a torrential downpour.
Lady you asked about my house sale...well we were aiming to move in the last week of July and our buyers rang on Friday to say they're not sure if they can afford it any more angry. We gave them till Monday to decide if they're pulling out - they rang monday and asked to have until today. They rang today and said they can't decide what to do. they really want it but are not sure about the money. they have one more option which they are will discuss tomorrow with mortgage people, but we've said we're calling it off on Monday so they have till then. Flippin annoying. We accepted the offer in February and it's taken them till now to go flakey. I've already got Lu into a new school for September which she is really excited about (she spent the day there on Tuesday and made 3 new best friends!) so we really want this move to happen. We are so powerless.
I'm feeling a little stressed with general end of term busy-ness; school concerts, french club assembly, school trip, nursery trip, recorder club recital, sports day, birthday parties...and I feel like I can't quite keep up. Having said that I'm pretty stable and doing well on these meds - I even got semi-discharged by the CPN (no more appointments but I can ring her if I need to).
Anyway I'll stop waffling.
I really will try harder to keep up better. New thread, new me!

traceface Thu 12-Jul-12 20:14:06

ooh crossed posts with loads then!
Beans that's good news abot your dad. What a relief for you. Hope the radiotherapy is not too horrid for him.

traceface Thu 12-Jul-12 21:15:30

did I break the thread?

JamInMyWellies Thu 12-Jul-12 21:26:30

Beans thats good positive news xx

VagolaJahooli Thu 12-Jul-12 23:12:08

Beans that is wonderful news. Sorry it took so long to get to you, we were all waiting with you.

Trace, that is a decent time, anything under 35 means you are running at a good pace. I know what you mean about fitting runs in, I've started getting up early a couple of days a week and 8 am on a Saturday. I know it sounds a bit evil to get up early but I'm starting to quite enjoy it and have way more productive days when I start off with a run.

That sounds like a nightmare about the house, you don't think they are trying to get you to drop the price do you? Well your doing really well if all that is going on and you are also being discharged by the CPN. Know what you mean about all the school and after school stuff. I don't know how you do it and work. I find all the getting around to afterschool activities like DS's violin, gymnastics and swimming quite tiring. He loves it but I think even he was a bit tired by the last week of school. Poor thing. DS2 will be starting all that soon. Crikey. I'm going to be cycling all over town.

I did the swim, was lovely weather and the water was quite a pleasant temperature but man alive it was rough. They considered calling it off because the current was so strong and I wish they had. It was really hard, and I'm a strong swimmer, some of the people swimming it didn't look particularly fit. Tomorrows dunes 5km is what I thought would be the hard race, this evenings swim was mostly just for a bit of fun, but it really was not fun. I hope the water has settled for the triathlon races on Saturday.

LadyThompson Thu 12-Jul-12 23:34:20

Beans, I am SO relieved for you. It's been nagging away at me today. Haroo!

Smashing to see you, young Trace! Your list of what you've got going on sounded somewhat punishing. And a big poo on your buyers. That is mega infuriating. I hope they can pull something out of the bag, you must be so fed up. As for the running - keep at it. The health benefits make it worthwhile, who cares about the speed?

Rubes, I TOTALLY see why you would want to buy your house. spacious, lovely lay out, gorgeous views...and it just has a very nice feel. As for your DH, of course, the fellowship. I was being thick. Hey, I think that's promising that your DD is loo aware! I was told girls are easier to TT but if DD1 is anything to go by, I wonder! As for conceiving - I'm an old giffer now, 'twould prob take me years!

Obes - I meant to say, super excited by your TTC plans. Wowzers!

Vag, how did the race go? And how is DS1?

Oh Indith, you have already convinced me that phonics isn't all bad, I promise you grin. But to me, it shouldn't be the be all and end all, as it appears to have become in many schools. And talking about 'decoding' instead of 'reading', it makes me want to hit something with an axe. I don't like the fact that this new compulsory test has nonsense words in too. Cos that's testing understanding of phonics and not reading and I find it incredibly misplaced and depressing. But I am probably just going to have to suck it up. Maybe I will be pleasantly surprised, who knows. Incidentally, Vag, I think your DS1 is a little superstar with all he has to learn with the whole Dutch 'n' English thing.

Jam, my Mum used to let me walk on other people's walls in the manner you describe. I only let DD do it on the school wall, though. But thinking about it, I think someone else's wall is probably ok. But I wouldn't allow them into a garden, I reckon.

I don't know...come on here, all proud that I FINALLY have a 'normal' BMI, only to be told that I have nether regions in which I could carry the weekly shop home grin grin

I have more people to say things to but I am at Mum's and me thumbs are getting tired, typing on the phone...

VagolaJahooli Thu 12-Jul-12 23:39:00

Oh and meant to say, I let the kids walk on peoples fences if they are an ok height. There aren't that many front gardens here and most have gates so I don't think it would occur to the boys to go in. Personally I don't think its that bad though, their kids, so what, if my boys wandered into a yard I would call them back but its not bad behaviour. It's not like they are causing damage. In London people, as in adults, used to walk past our house and drop their crisp packets into our front garden, now that is disrespectful and annoying. Kids exploring, I think that is fine. Esp if the garden owner says its ok.

LadyThompson Thu 12-Jul-12 23:44:45

X-posted with you, Vag. You're turning into a bit of a superhero with all these frightening sounding challenges, you know! But agree that -sadly - getting up early is the key to getting more stuff done.

Not as early as you, perhaps, KP! Seriously, though, I hope you can get rid of the random insomnia at least. I am well versed in that, and it's vile. Certain visualisations do help me with that, though (and help to clear my mind). My latest one is that I imagine I am in a sleeper on the Orient Express. I think of all the sounds I might hear and silly as it sounds, it helps me nod off.

Night all xx

KiwiPanda Fri 13-Jul-12 06:51:00

Oo LadyT that sounds so soothing I'm going to try that. Though last night's lack of sleep was caused by an insomniac baby waking up every 20 minutes. I am so tired I could weep

Beans brilliant news! I hope the arthritis doesn't trouble him much?

McKayz Fri 13-Jul-12 07:01:29

Beans, that's great news!! I hope the radiotherapy doesn't make him too sick.

urbanewarrior Fri 13-Jul-12 09:31:00

Great news beans smile and hurrah for you Kayz. On feeding I am v simplistic and think you should do whatever makes you happy. And know you wanted to do this do well done for persevering.

Just quick drop in from me - slightly nightmare week and children are being painful. So to improve on situation (dd is already 1 penalty down for her mucking about this morning) am going to ikea. Our normally ace nanny keeps forgetting to put the mattress protector on the beds an dd's mattress has finally died thanks to a spectacular accident in the night. Oh and we unexpectedly have to find £5k for a new car. Sigh.

Loads more I wanted I say will try and be back later. Fingers crossed on your house trace. I think you and I would run well together.

Can I walk at a firm but respectful pace behind you and Trace, Urbane, and bring you water and sweeties and otherwise make you realise you both are about a million times fitter than myself?

Bummer about the mattress, upside is that you will return with about 25 assorted little trinkets you didn't want, and that will leave you around £4K for the car...

BEans I am glad that it's "just" arthritis (although I agree that must still be very painful) - I hope he can find some effective medication that doesn't interact with the other stuff he's on. Poor fella.

Trace that is so annoying about the house, why we have this stupid, archaic system in this country I don't know. They are so cheeky, I hope you win at hardball with them. Also great news on being "signed off" from your CPN. It sounds like you're doing really well at coping with a manic time at the mo.

On the topic of fence-gate (as 'twere), I am the worst kind - T just goes off and tried to walk on the wall. Sadly he has no coordination so will fall off said wall, scream loudly, and alert everyone's attention to our presence. I think make very middle-class sounds, interspersing comforting him in his agonies with telling him off for walking on other people's property.

Kiwi I have to say our children sound horrifyingly similar in their nocturnal habits. I didn't realise other people have the up all night baby and awake at 5am baby/preschooler combo. We may have to form some kind of support club. Or buy a very large building in the middle of a field where we can drive them at 5am, leave them with refreshed 20-somethings, and pass out in a comfy room until 10. What say you?

That pattern has been just one of the reasons I vote my holiday is the Worst Ever. Other aspects include:

- It raining Every Single Day since we've been here. It's an 8 day holiday, where the main activity is going to the beach. We drove an hour yesterday to get to the nearest soft play hell. The kids were so pleased they cried as we tried to drag them out of the grotty shack.

- My friend's sister being sectioned the night before we were due to come. She was meant to stay in another apartment in the village, her boyfriend and two kids came alone instead.

- My friend having a massive argument with her mother last week ( we are staying in her mother's house), cue lots of tension, passive aggression, etc.

- So my friend is exhausted, and also knackered from having to tell her son (T's "best" friend) off every 5 minutes for hitting T, saying nasty things, etc.

- B is cutting four teeth and has worms. His sleep and general disposition are less than perfect.

I think that's it. Oh, and of course my friend passing out at the wheel of her car from exhaustion and stress, and ending up in a ditch.

We return home on Sunday night. It will feel like a holiday.

Indith Fri 13-Jul-12 12:26:04

<<hands Spot more wine>>

That is a rather spectacular holiday!

LadyThompson Fri 13-Jul-12 13:17:33

Great galloping cupcakes, Spot shock That sounds like one of the most cataclysmically miserable hols I have ever heard of. Erm, but how you will luxuriate when you get home.

Urbs, the new car is a bummer. Hope you came through Ikea ok....I haven't been since the last century. Literally!

LadyThompson Fri 13-Jul-12 13:17:35

Great galloping cupcakes, Spot shock That sounds like one of the most cataclysmically miserable hols I have ever heard of. Erm, but how you will luxuriate when you get home.

Urbs, the new car is a bummer. Hope you came through Ikea ok....I haven't been since the last century. Literally!

JamInMyWellies Fri 13-Jul-12 13:20:13

Wow that puts our tornados into perspective. wine wine wine infact a whole bottle for spot

KiwiPanda Fri 13-Jul-12 15:31:36

Spot that sounds a bit like a trip we once took to Budapest though at least we only had one DD at the time. She howled the ENTIRE TIME, it pissed down, it was freezing, everything was closed because apparently mother's day is a big holiday in Hungary or something, and we got about 25 minutes sleep a night. NEver been so glad to come home in my life.

Now you will TOTALLY be up for my plan then. Basically I'm thinking giant cage, with food dispensers and water bottles like they have for guinea pigs, a wheel for DD2 to crawl around, a TV for DD1 and an automatic timer that only opens the door at 7am. Oh and soundproofing, naturally. You up for it? I reckon we can get the parts off eBay..

Talking of eBay my usually sweet placid DD2 is a total GRUMPMONSTER today. Teeth? It must be teeth. We shall always blame teeth, right? She is being hideous howlmonster from the howl lagoon

VagolaJahooli Fri 13-Jul-12 17:12:13

I think Spots idea is good, but when you say 20 somethings you mean, recently graduated from a childcare/erotic massage course don't you. Well when I say erotic I just mean plain old full body massage.

That holiday really takes the biscuit Spot. I think you should start a thread on here and see if anyone can come up with a worse holiday experience. Your poor friend. Her DS was probably just responding to her stress, not much fun for T though. Were you able to get her out for a drink?

I'm of out for the run bit of the races at our beach. Think I might eaten a bit too much too late today though.

VagolaJahooli Fri 13-Jul-12 21:26:04

Oops should have added 20something males. Looked like I was wanting some young ladies to look after my kids then lather me up in oil.

Did my run. Flipping heck after last night current and waves, tonight they had epic wind on the run back up the beach. The first three kms was all sandy dune hills which I did ok on and was on target for a decent time then the last 2 km was a run up the beach then a slight hill up to the finish on the esplanade. Bugger me but the last 2km took longer than the first 3km. I ended up finishing in 29.30secs when I am sure I was going to do it in under 27. Oh well it was good for building strength I will def go back and train on that circuit. DH said he thinks a lot of people cheated as he saw a lot of people coming in looking as though they had not been for a run and were on the largish size, then he saw quite fit looking people who were tres sweaty come in well after them. Bit stupid really to cheat unless they really didn't fancy the run in the wind. So placing might not he worth checking but otherwise I'm happy. Having a well earned home made cocktail now. A kumquat & strawberry caprinhia I bought some kumquats to make marmalade again but they didn't deliver enough so this was the alternative. Yummers.

SummerLightning Fri 13-Jul-12 23:03:58

Halloooo,
beans hurrah for good news on your dad, that is great.
spot sorry about the holiday, sounds like something out of a sit com. An un-funny sit com. This weather is the pits, isn't it? I am so pissed off with it!! kiwi I think I remember you moaning about the Budapest trip before as well. Sounds pretty grim too, hence why I must have remembered it!

vag surely 29:30 is good across dunes? Isn't that really hard going? (in addition to the wind and the uphill) Your swim sounded scary!

trace nice to hear from you. Oh god, so sorry to hear about the house, hope those bloody buyers can get it together, it is so stressful isn't it?

My BMI is a "normal" 24 at the mo too, I don't know about my vag, as haven't measured that. I could do to lose a few lbs though I reckon, especially if I want to get faster at running.

Phonics, I don't really know what it is to be honest. I did buy some cards that indith recommended, as DH is always trying to teach DS to read, and so I thought I would get something "official". he is so uninterested though. I don't think he's going to be very academic, or at least he's going to be a late starter!

rubes dd is the same with the toilet. "I need wee-wee. Take my nappy off". proudly "I finished!" (no wee). Then pees all over the carpet as I haven't put nappy back on in time. GREAT! But hopefully will be easier than DS who incidentally after FINALLY seeming potty trained for a couple of months is now peeing himself nearly every day. I think it's just laziness, and he doesn't seem to care or take it seriously. "It is ok, I didn't mean to do it, we can just change my pants". Great. Any tips?

kayz such good news about DD's weight gain - hope the BF settles down soon re let down, etc. It did for me both times. Oh and I was always dropping food on their head, and eating one handed. I got very good at it in the end (the eating one handed that is, to be honest I never stopped dropping food on them)

lady I like "biffing on". It's very you as well!

kiwi i did some intervals (running) as I thought I should do them more often. They were 400m ones (x8) and my hamstrings have only really stopped hurting today and I did it on Monday? Is that normal or should I warm up better? (or even at all, ahem).
I never did that 5k park run last week, am meant to be going tomorrow. Am never going to beat my pb though as it's due to piss it down all night and the park gets quite puddly and waterlogged and will def slow the course down. Bugger! Should probably still go though.

McKayz Sat 14-Jul-12 07:04:37

Dd slept all night. She fed from about 4 til 11 yesterday evening. Then woke up at 5 for a feed. Apart from looking like I snuck off and had a boob job I feel great!!

Now going to King's Lynn for the weekend to see family. All 5 of us are in 1 hotel room tonight. Gonna be fun!!

Have good weekends everyone!

Indith Sat 14-Jul-12 08:39:25

Oh sod off with your sleep talk Kayz angry

wink

grin

That's fab. I bet you feel so refreshed smile

Ds2 is doing nicely at the moment too apart from a cough still which keeps him up a bit. He self settles in the day and at bedtime shock which he just started doing a couple of weeks ago and is starting to nice little stretches rather than insisting on having a nipple in his mouth at all times.

I still feel knackered but tis probably just a bit of a low ppoint compounded by builders, house being a mess, lack of exercise etc making me feel shit.

Anyway. FIL coming up today and I am meeting StealthPolarBear in an hour to go down to the stream with some flowers for Aillidh so I had better go do a little bit of cleaning!

KiwiPanda Sat 14-Jul-12 08:54:14

Kayz envy and also grin to you!

Summer Yeah it does sound like maybe you didn't warm up the muscles enough, though also stepping up a gear in terms of speed can just use muscles that aren't used to it! The main thing I think people forget is that warming up means a bit of running, ideally, not just stretching. At my running club, for instance, we do 4 laps of the track (a mile) to warm up - really slowly, chatting pace - then loads of stretching, then drills, then another lap - before we start the main bit. I'd suggest next time just doing a proper jog warm up. It's much easier to remember when someone is telling you what to do though!

Right talking of which have running club in half an hour, better get ready. The 3am start DD2 blessed me with will really help hmm

Rubena Sat 14-Jul-12 09:19:27

Urgh sore throat headache and achy all over. Dh the same. Both in bed at 9pm last night. Feel like death but can push thru with ibuprofen.
Dh at work again today. Kids fighting and driving cars on me. Thank god for team umizoomi. It has just now stopped them in their tracks.
Well done Vag I'd say that's brilliant! Crikey Spot. Makes my round the world trip with two sick kids sound easy. Urgh gotta find energy to take ds to swimming. Need more drugs.

SummerLightning Sat 14-Jul-12 11:21:17

Kayz that is great news on the sleep. May there be many more nights like that.

Kiwi I hope it was just using muscles I hadn't for a while. It felt like I had taken longer strides and thus pulled muscles. I did run a bit to warm up as the nice long walking/cycle path that we do intervals on is about half a mile away. No stretches though.

KiwiPanda Sat 14-Jul-12 17:18:25

SL if it's both legs and just general achiness then yeah, must be just muscles getting used to it. When I started running again a few months ago I was pretty much permanently achy!

Running club this morning was so cold I came back with blue lips. Unbelievable for July. Was fine while running but once we stopped and did all the press ups etc at the end it was basically 30 minutes in soggy clothes getting colder and colder. I had to hug a hot water bottle when I got back! Hell of a session too (4 x 1500m with only 100m recovery followed by 4x150m sprints)

Almost as exhausting was trip to the park with both DDs in horrible rain to meet friends and get them out of DH's hair so he could do some work. Am so knackered now! DD2 is at that awkward age where she just wants to crawl but you obviously can't put her down in soaking wet grass so spends all the time in sling

Hey ho. Summer eh? sad

VagolaJahooli Sat 14-Jul-12 19:34:52

Wow Kayz that's fantastic on the sleep. Well done little R, a few more nights like that please. I love the boob job comment.

Kiwi DH & I used to do 1600meter sets (we did it on treadmills & the machines were in miles so easier to just set a mile) and I was always on a mission so get further below 7mins. I think the fastest I ever did was 6.52 or something which is probably what you do on at a normal pace. Anyhoo, one day I was feeling quite strong and after 2 sets I was almost up to my fastest 1 mile, I tended to do my best time of the session on the 3rd set so I was really pumped and excited thinking I was going to do it. I was pushing so hard and in the end just missed out by a couple of seconds. I was so pissed off I 'said' "F'ing C!" (You'll need to add the words in your imagination). Unfortunately, I had my headphones up quite loud and what I thought was said just above audible, was actually loud enough for the people in the swimming pool to hear. oops.

Anyway last nights run was pretty good in the end, I came 25th out of 80 women and 80th out of 160 overall. I'm pretty happy with that as a lot of the competitors looked pretty fit. I went for a nice slow run with the girls this morning in the rain, which was nice but wet. Then we had a coffee & croissant afterwards, we realised that in the year or so that we had known each other this was the first child free coffee we had together!

Summer, starting sprint training does cause a lot of achiness, but its nice to know its muscles growing, plus could your calves be a little tighter than most due to cycling? Make sure you do calf stretches as well as other sketching before & after, but be careful not to over stretch in the first couple of weeks.

Indith, you sound like you need a cuddle, or a cocktail. Can I make you one? I am currently experimenting with the variations on the theme of Caprinhia.

KiwiPanda Sat 14-Jul-12 19:42:03

Ha Vag that's funny but not as funny as the time DH fell off the treadmill and did even louder, more sweary swearing grin
Did my 1500ms in about 6'15 so not very different!

Hey so tomorrow marks a momentous night in the Panda household. We are going to see Paul Simon in Hyde Park so DHs parents are coming and are going to put the girls to bed. This is the first time in 3.5 years that someone other than me or DH has put DD1 to bed. And obviously A first for DD2 too.

Am a bit nervous

McKayz Sat 14-Jul-12 20:44:52

So far so good. The boys are in their pjs and lying in bed watching tv. It's been very nice seeing my Dad and Sister. Plus I'm going to be an Auntie again!!!! It's quite strange as my niece is 11, nearly 12 and starting high school in September. But there's almost 13 years between DH and his older brother.

Lovely news about being an auntie again and great work on the boob job, Kayz. I am very pleased for you re-DD's sleep, and v envy too, naturellement...

Vag that is amazing, you are clearly superwoman. Top hole, old girl.

Kiwi, I do try to have sympathy for you on your poor weather-related running experiences, but as it is completely self-inflicted and you could be sitting at home eating cake instead, I struggle, I must confess. Maybe one day I will have a strong enough pelvic floor to withstand running and then I will Get It.

Home tomorrow. Thank the lord - have avoided some mega rows today, tension ridiculously high. We have all turned mega passive aggressive, and then have to drink through it to get through the day. I feel like I'm in a Mike Leigh film. I have also put on about a stone this week thanks to epic consumption of cheese, wine and gateaux. sad.

Sorry, Kiwi, missed your post about gig tomorrow night. PLease don't worry - they'll have an ace time, and will probably enjoy the novelty. PLus it's their grandparents looking after them, so even if they're a bit unsettled, they're being cared for by people who love them and not randoms off the street. Enjoy Paul Simon, am envy.

VagolaJahooli Sun 15-Jul-12 09:42:25

Kiwi, I understand your nerves but they will be fine. We had a similar thing a few years ago when ds1 was 2.5 and we were in Oz for a wedding. The wedding started at 3 and obviously went all night so we had to leave him with my mum, who he barely knew due to us living in the UK, anyway he was fine, he was a little teary at bedtime but mum just snuggled up to him and he fell asleep in her arms. He actually really loved it as he had her complete attention until bedtime and got all the usual grandmother treats. We recently had to leave ds2 with the babysitter to put him to bed for the first time and he was quite nervous but having a his brother with him made all the difference and now if we are going out even if we don't need to leave until after his bedtime he refuses to go to bed until she has arrived. Both boys love the sitter so we usually get her to come early now. Go out and enjoy, they will be fine.

traceface Sun 15-Jul-12 22:48:05

Hello. This will be brief and full of errors because I'm on my phone. Kiwi, how was it leaving the nippers?
spot your holiday sounds painful. Hope you can recover once you're back.
Kayz the Amazing, well done it sounds like dd is doing fabulously!
I went for a run today while Lu was at a party and did 15k. It took me 1hr and 43 mins so still rather slow, but my aim is to run the whole GNR, and I'm not really bothered how slowly I do it.
Right must sleep. Will try to post properly tomorrow from lap top. Night night xx

Indith Mon 16-Jul-12 07:52:39

Kiwi how did it go?

I'll hand the dcs over to anyone half competent these days grin.

Trace we should arrange a mini meet up when you do the GNR smile

VagolaJahooli Mon 16-Jul-12 08:02:22

Wow Trace 15km is alright. How are you finding the running, do you enjoy it? Are you feeling any benefit? I have to say I am loving feeling a bit stronger and healthier. I feel more awake and back to be able to resists sugary things. But at the same time nice to know I can have a little treat and can work it off. Also we went to a big pool play thing yesterday and i wore my bikini and for the first time in ages I didn't feel wobbly and self conscious. Dutch women are surprisingly lean so it is difficult to not feel lardy around them but yesterday I felt not too big.

Northern Ladies, I have a friend in a town called Caistor and was thinking of sailing over to Hull on the overnight to see her, is that near anyone or is it miles away? Was thinking of having a northern meet up.

McKayz Mon 16-Jul-12 08:17:40

Ooooh Vag, it's probably 1.5/2 hours from me. So not too far. ZJ is close by too.

I was looking at taking up running, but I doubt my knees could take it. Let alone my ankle which still isn't right since I twisted in it March. I should go back to the doctor really.

I need to sort out the bike too. Poor thing has just sat in the garage since just before I got pregnant.

Kiwi, I hope you had a great time and the girls were ok. My boys always sleep better for other people.

KiwiPanda Mon 16-Jul-12 08:29:40

Trace I did 15km yesterday too! It was clearly the in distance ..

Had such a wonderful time last night grin
But poor DD1 howled from the second we left to when she went to sleep but having been up in the night and then up for the day at 5.30 she was seriously knackered ... Apparently when actually in bed she went to sleep in about 10 seconds. DD2 was a bit trickier but that's because my father in law totally ignored all our advice smile still only took 15 minutes though

Ow my head this morning!!

Indith Mon 16-Jul-12 09:29:02

My parents are in Hull so that's a possibility for me smile

McKayz Mon 16-Jul-12 09:42:58

Hopefully it's not too far for Trace either.

Is it normal for babies to get hiccups all the time? I don't remember the boys having them do much.

McKayz Mon 16-Jul-12 09:43:43

Why do iPhones change so to do? So is a perfectly normal and commonly used word.

Indith Mon 16-Jul-12 10:58:54

Yeah they grow out of it though Kayz.

Vag can you help here?

Indith Mon 16-Jul-12 10:59:34

It is piddling it down, I have 2 loads of washing out but the baby is asleep on me <<sigh>>

Nolda Mon 16-Jul-12 11:50:50

Well here I am with a proper catch up, sorry it's taken me so long.

LadyT - Well done on the BMI. Have you looked at the Global Fat Scale Thread? I'm from Latvia.

Kayz - So glad to hear that DD is putting on weight and the struggle with BF has been worth it. I agree with Vag that it's such a shame that your MW has not been more supportive. Hope you had a lovely weekend in Kings Lynn. Oh, and exciting news on being an auntie again!

Beans - Hope your dad's radiotherapy goes well.

Jam - I'm a mean mummy and discourage all wall walking but in weak moments may allow it as long as not belonging to a private house, sorry.

Kiwi - So glad that you enjoyed the concert. Sounds like the gps did OK. Would you be prepared to repeat it?

Spot - What a ghastly holiday. I bet you were glad to get home.

Vag - I hope DS1 is feeling better. Well done on your races in such adverse conditions. And bet you looked fab in your bikini!

Indith - Thanks for recommending the read write cards. I bought them for DS as he is very keen on letters and words which is very different from DD when she was the same age. DD likes teaching DS the jolly phonics actions. I was very hmm about phonics when DD started school but it seems to have served her well.

Rubes - Hope your house situation works out. How about a Fisher Price house for DD? Or a playhouse for the garden. Is your sore throat better today?

I too am worrying about what friends will be going to school with DS. It seems that DS has been friends with older boys at pre-school and they will all be starting school this September. Oh well, I'm sure both our boys will cope.

Trace - I'm a slower runner too. Keep it up! It is so difficult to fit the training in isn't it? I would have to add f) likelihood of needing a poo half way round (sorry about TMI. Having children has somehow badly affected my innards). So sorry to hear about your house buyers going wobbly, it really is a bit outrageous at this late stage. But good news about being semi-discharged by CPN. Hope you're pleased.

Urbane - Much sympathy on bed and car dying. I love Ikea though grin.

Summer - Well done to DS for learning to ride his bike. Such a clever little chap. We still haven't managed to get our Eddie on his balance bike. He likes it a lot and will pat it but looks horrified if we suggest that he might like to sit on it! Also on the weeing, Ed has taken to leaving it too late and weeing all over the bathroom floor. Just a stage I'm hoping hmm.

Life is generally good with us. DH and I have been getting on much better and we are due to go away this weekend while MIL takes care of the DCs. However, I am having major problems with DD. She is an angel at school but a monster when she is at home so it must be something I'm doing. I have to confess that, although I know I shouldn't, I have always loved DS more. I think we just bonded better at the beginning. DD was in intensive care after she was born etc. I try not to show how I feel but DD has twigged it and it's as if she wants to prove her theory. Am dreading the school holidays sad.

Beans36 Mon 16-Jul-12 12:48:54

Oh Nolda, that sounds tough. Might be an idea to have a day for you and DD and lavish affection and time on her and make sure she knows how much you love her. Do you think DH would look after DS for you so you could take her somewhere?

Just back from a weekend in Cumbria. Was marvellous and my littles were so good. Felt v proud. We had beautiful sunshine and went for loads of walks and a game fair and just had a ball. Afraid it's at the other end of the spectrum from your experience, Spot! Sorry! I must say, you do write so well, your post made me giggle, whilst cringing for you. You need a holiday now!

Had a long conversation with DH about another baby and, Obes, looks like we might be joining you on TTC in a few months. Shit. Eek. Yay! Terror. Veer between great excitement and total horror at my decision. AND we're getting a puppy in a couple of months. Bloody hell! What are we doing?

I have put the heating on here. It's bloody miserable with pissing rain. Feeling very sad. And our car is breaking, balls.

JamInMyWellies Mon 16-Jul-12 13:00:02

Beans we too are contemplating No.3 shock

McKayz Mon 16-Jul-12 13:06:42

Yay!! New babies!!

Nolda Mon 16-Jul-12 13:29:26

Hurrah for contemplating no. 3 announcements!

Beans, there is definitely something wrong when someone has a sunny holiday in Cumbria and it's pxxxing down on the south coast. Pleased for you nonetheless.

I too have the heating on. It's so much easier to try to look on the bright side when it's sunny outdoors. Chin up, if you were closer I'd try to tempt you with chocolate cake and biscuits with which I'm awash after DD's party on Saturday.

I think your right on some one on one time. I'll have to put my thinking cap on (and bribe DH). I do love DD and if I hadn't had DS, I would never have thought anything was wrong.

Beans36 Mon 16-Jul-12 14:02:27

Hey, Jam! That's cool. Although not yet. Am still taking the pill. Think am a bit in denial!
Nolda, could you take DD to lunch somewhere, then onto cinema or something? Then would only need to be for an afternoon. My two are in childcare til 3. I miss them! But won't be saying that next week in school holidays!

Spoke to a sleep expert this morning. I must leave Pru when she's screaming at night, until she reaches critical point, then go in and reassure, but not give her water. Then leave and do it again every time. She reckons it'll take a week til she gets it. But have to get DH's buy in. Hope he goes for it! I need her to sleep through before I even contemplate getting up the duff!!

Nolda Mon 16-Jul-12 14:08:54

We had to do that with DD, Beans. It didn't take a week. About 3 days I think (but it was hard). Do you think your DH won't agree?

Beans36 Mon 16-Jul-12 14:35:40

I think he will now I've pai someone to help me! Plus I'll make him!

But yes, think we'll get there now!

KiwiPanda Mon 16-Jul-12 15:55:59

Beans Wow to number 3! DH would be delighted if I announced I wanted a third. He once promised me that if we had a third, I could get a cat so it's tempting wink

Nolda Yes I think we should definitely do it more often! DD1 would have been much more jolly about it if she hadn't been so tired and now she's done it once she has that memory, IFSWIM, and knows we came back and everything was fine.. She slept over 12 hours last night so she must have been SO shattered poor mite. The best thing was that my in laws were just totally relaxed about it, which made us feel relaxed, no drama or anything. My parenst on the other hand would have been texting every 1 minute. They are so useless hmm

Hey ho what a miserable day. AGAIN. I think even the snails and slugs in my garden are a bit fed up now.

KiwiPanda Mon 16-Jul-12 16:05:52

PS Opinions sought: I keep obsessing over this dress. Shall I buy it (I have £100 voucher so would still be pricey but not as much..) Too boring?

Beans36 Mon 16-Jul-12 16:06:41

Kiwi - I'm so glad it went well having someone else to put your DDs to bed. I must admit, we've had other people do it loads, which has been great as means we've been able to go to weddings etc without them. In fact, we're leaving them with inlaws a week on Friday until Sunday evening so we can go to a wedding in York, where DH is best man and I'm doing the make up! Hurray!

DH managed to persuade me into having a third by totally playing on my vanity. I've been toying with the idea, but had decided no, two was fine. But he told me what a fantastic mother I am and that it was a case of the more the merrier. I was so chuffed that I agreed. Promise I'm not that shallow, though. I've been thinking about a third for months now and have never been able to completely put it out of my mind, despite thinking I'd convinced myself that two was enough! Ho hum.

Indith Mon 16-Jul-12 16:20:26

Dress is nice but boring. If you are going to buy a navy wrap dress you might as well just buy this one for 16.

It is great when grandparents are happy to babysit isn't it. MIL is sort of ok but faffs and panics. My parents and the dcs are happy as pigs in shit together, it is fab.

Very exciting at all the number 3s coming up in the future! 3 is great grin <<hides eye bags>> <<shoves mess under carpet>>

I went out on Saturday. I had a cocktail and a pile of calamari. FIL was here so dh left him with the big ones a =nd drove me in/picked me up so I could have the drink. I love dh grin.

Nolda I second/third/whatever spending some time with your dd. I should do the same really. I know how you feel. I adore dd but it isn't an easy bond in the same way it is with the boys. I feel so guilty about the first couple of years of her life too, especially her baby days. Everything was so blury and horrible and I was an absolute mess. Things are wonderful with ds2 which just makes it all the worse when I think about how it was with her.

What are people planning for the summer then to stop the dcs driving you mad? I need to get all my plans on paper and start sorting out what I need. We have a few trips in mind but ds1 wants to make bows and arrows so we need to go to a garden centre and get bamboo canes and we are going to have a bit of a big project and have a bash at making a clay pizza oven!

I have a meeting with preschool on Wednesday. Ha. I hate the bloody place so I am going to attempt to put a fire cracker up some arses. Sadly I don't hold out much hope.

Indith Mon 16-Jul-12 16:21:40

Disclaimer- I am shit at fashion related things.

Beans36 Mon 16-Jul-12 16:31:28

I'm with Indith, Kiwi - the dress is ok, but I wouldn't spend that much money on a plain navy dress. Although, I too am no fashion guru. I buy my jeans at Tesco after all. I spent a happy hour turning up the hem of one pair this morning and they'd only cost me £10. Wasn't really worth the hassle! I love them and find them really comfy and flattering. I already have them in blue and couldn't find size 12 regular anywhere, not even online in black, so bought size 12 long leg and have hemmed them. silly girl! See, no fashion sense!

Beans36 Mon 16-Jul-12 16:32:18

Oh tits having said I couldn't find them in regular anywhere, they have clearly restocked and I could have just got them online. What a bastard.

McKayz Mon 16-Jul-12 16:43:31

I can't imagine spending so much on a dress. But then I live in H&M, Primark and New look stuff. I don't really follow fashion.

I am buying the dress Indith linked to but in purple for DDs christening. I am so fat it is depressing so it better not look too awful sad

Indith Mon 16-Jul-12 16:45:06

I have one of the long sleeved ones in red Kayz, it is quite flattering on the tummy and should make your norks look so fabulous noone will see the tummy anyway.

McKayz Mon 16-Jul-12 16:50:32

Can you BF in it? This is the problem I'm having. I am going to York tomorrow so hoping they have the dress in the shop.

KiwiPanda Mon 16-Jul-12 16:51:34

I quite like boring grin but I think you are right, it's a bit dull. Maybe a DP dress will fulfill my need for a wrap one.

KiwiPanda Mon 16-Jul-12 16:53:22

ps DD2 has just learnt to clap AND wave. She's so cute

Indith Mon 16-Jul-12 16:58:35

Yes you can bf easily. Wrap dresses leave the whole of the top of your nork exposed when feeding though so get a cheap vest top and cut it into a crop top then you can pull that up before you pull the wrap down so it covers the top of your boob. I have a couple of vest tops in full length so they cover my tummy when I lift my top to feed and a couple I've sliced into crop tops to cover the top of my boob when I pull a wrap/unbutton a neckline for feeding.

McKayz Mon 16-Jul-12 17:00:05

I'd never thought of cutting the tops. I will do that, thanks smile

Indith Mon 16-Jul-12 17:01:57

New Look sell bandeau tops too which work well under wrap dresses but I think you are rather more blessed than I am in the nork department and I'm not sure they would work so well for you!

KiwiPanda Mon 16-Jul-12 17:05:41

You could just drape a scarf/ shawl type thing over your shoulder too. God knows you'll need the warmth in this weather anyway...!

McKayz Mon 16-Jul-12 17:12:53

Indith, a 40E at the minute. I'm hoping to be a bit smaller once its all settled down.

KiwiPanda Mon 16-Jul-12 18:25:51

If you thought the first one was a bit boring and expensive, check out THIS number...

Rubena Mon 16-Jul-12 19:04:39

Still feeling grim but dosed up on everything under the sun and also found some throat lozenges with anesthetic in so things slightly bearable now. Had unstick eyelids this morning but worst of all had to postpone the long planned lunch with our LadyT sad

Hi Nolda, thanks yes feeling slightly more human this evening - my two are both in nursery Mondays so was able to sleep some of today. Thanks for the suggestions for DD - might look into those - thought about outside playhouse but in this weather might not be worth it sad

Got roster today and work had already denied my request for unpaid leave, but then the computer rostering gave me the whole time I wanted with no work anyway (just by chance) dumb. But win win for me! So fortunately it works again that we both have time off so will still be able to choof off somewhere.

Kiwi, I quite like the dress, although I recently bought a robe that is very similar so kind of put me off, however I bought a really lovely wrap dress last Summer from Esprit though it's not on their website anymore.

Rubena Mon 16-Jul-12 19:06:48

cross posted with that last dress Kiwi - that is really similar to the one I bought from Esprit! Mine isn't silk though, or Chloe, clearly!

McKayz Mon 16-Jul-12 19:08:01

Wow!! That's expensive!! My brothers car cost less than that grin

Beans36 Mon 16-Jul-12 19:26:38

Dear God that's expensive. Wouldn't dream of spending that kind of money. But I like it more than the other one and you can tell its classy just by looking at it. If I was minted, I'd buy it! Like it more than original one.

Babes in bed. New sleep regime starts tonight!

Indith Mon 16-Jul-12 19:47:03

Wow that is a lot of money!

It is nice though. I do like a simple wrap dress, but no way would I spend that sort of money on something that simple!

Mind you I am getting the hang of spending more money on clothes, the big wardrobe revamp is a work in progress but I am getting there, I had a mini spending spree on The White Stuff website the other day and have a lovely skirt and jumper and a couple of basic tops that I know are going to last in a way cheap ones wouldn't.

I feel most for whichever mug poor bugger bought that dress at full price. If you saw anyone else in it, you'd want to know if they'd just paid the £444 for it...

Glad you had a nice night out, Kiwi, even if the settling of the DDs didn't quite go as planned. Has it made you want to go out again in a hurry?

Nolda, I agree with the others who suggested hanging out with your DD more intensively. It sounds like you've both got into a tricky dynamic, and you need to shake things up a bit. i hope she responds positively - I can't imagine it not making your both happier!

Fair play to Beans and Jam considering no. 3. I will be vicariously enjoying the experience without having to do it myself!

That's interesting about your sleep chat, BEans - I will follow your progress with avid interest. What's the thinking behind not giving water? I can see why you wouldn't want to encourage them to wake up, but what if they're thirsty? When I wake in the night I usually have a sip of water. Maybe kids don't need it in the way adults do after a few glasses of vino

VagolaJahooli Mon 16-Jul-12 22:30:27

I quite like by those dresses and i know the first is simple but would be good for everyday wear so maybe worth the money. The second is tree expensive though.

Lady and Invis when are you in Belgium?

Yay on the days off when dh is off rubes, result! Where will you go? Sorry your not well, I'm feeling a bit fluey, I think it is all the training. I have tomorrow off so will take it easy, except for a trip to the museum with the boys. They are loving having so much time together, I can hardly wait until they go to the same school together, they are so sweet, they love each other so much. I hope they are always this close.

More babies yay, but the idea of three is making me feel sleepy.

40E Kayz, Maarhoooosive! You will look awesome in that dress with those norks. I miss big boobs now, mine are fast dissappearing. Though was nice to wear my triangle bikini top on Sunday without looking like one of the ladies in the windows in Amsterdam.

Obergene Mon 16-Jul-12 22:45:25

Hi Ladies,

This week I am mainly running around like a headless chicken trying to finish a big work project, fulfil my duties as DD1's class rep by buying teachers presents & hosting parents' end of term drinks and pack for our US trip which starts in 4 days. Aaagghhh stressed! I am not sure I have time for a bikini wax - who goes to California with an untended lady garden???? And I need my hair cut but the DDs have nits and I would be mortified if it was discovered, in the Barber's chair, that I have too.

Beans, Jam, my third baby conception buddies! Yay! When do you guys plan to pull the goalie? And what a lovely way for your DH to persuade you into it Beans.

Rubes, sorry you are ill. And sorry you are facing more moves with your DH's work. Good news about your current house though.

Trace, 15k is amazing. Go you! Any news on the house? I hope you get to move.

Kiwi, Cos has some lovely shift dresses at the mo. I am slightly obsessed with Cos, I love their stuff and my new (size 10!) wardrobe is very Cos heavy.

Must get back to packing. We were away in Devon this weekend so I have to unpack in order to pack. Not fun.

Obergene Mon 16-Jul-12 22:52:40

Nolda, I meant to say that I was sorry to hear you are having trouble with your DD. I hope you can find a way to have a nice summer together. It's lively that you and your DH are closer now though.

Rubena Tue 17-Jul-12 09:03:22

Woke feeling worse than ever. Both eyes like they have sand in them. have to do drops hourly which I struggle to get in. Might get DS on the job. Throat easing though so that's something.

Beans how did the sleeping go? DD use to wake routinely once just before I went to bed and we gave her milk, then once around 2-3am and screamed for milk but we ignored and that stopped so I should probably ignore the 11pm-ish one but guess I give in cause usually still up. Might do that tonight. She also changed for the better when we took her out of the cot.

Hi Vag, yes its a good result - only prob they've got me working right on the only other weekend I had plans! (hard to please aren't I blush) but dunno, we will either go to Aust - to my DB's (it's his 40th but has no plans) (although last month I have slightly fallen out with parents over our original plan so prob wouldn't venture to their area) or perhaps go back to California with the fam of dh's who are over here for the Olympics as they go back the day our leave starts. That said, might struggle to get on a flight at the end of Olympics! Better check that.

Looking forward to following the #3-ers, but not sure if I'm feeling nauseous, tired, or relieved that it's not me! Good luck to all TTC though x

Obe you sound busy - Ah bugger, I went sick on my last trip and forgot to put a form in for you Obe - oh well hopefully you'll have the fabulous normal service anyway grin

KiwiPanda Tue 17-Jul-12 10:04:31

Oh Rubs I do hope you feel better soon. Take lots of zinc (DH's cure for virtually everything. If I said "Oh my arm's fallen off" he'd say "Try zinc!")

I want to go shopping and try on dresses. I think it's because I haven't really bought anything to wear (except running gear) since before I was pregnant with DD2 and everything in my wardrobe is either a bit big, a bit covered in baby sick or lightly decorated in stickers and crayola wink I think I'm also pining for a day by myself where I CAN actually try on things wihtout doing it in 0.000003 seconds while simultaneously feeding DD2 a banana to keep her happy ...

Rubena Tue 17-Jul-12 10:16:21

Thanks Kiwi. Will rummage for zinc. I know what you mean. (Not the part about only buying running gear) but my alternative to that scenario is shop online and then I spend my life doing returns as either it doesn't fit or I hate it. I guess fortunately I get to shop when I go to work (well not my next trip as I don't need a Sari)

B slept through! For the fourth time in his 19 month old life! <does a little dance>. Maybe because he actually ate a square meal before going to bed, for once...

Oh Rubes, you poor sausage sad. Can I come over and decrust your eyes? (I have a disgusting love of scabs and goo and crust and stuff like that). Glad the throat's getting better.

One thing I've really found helped my itchy eyes and cough this summer was Beconase nasal spray. I kept thinking I had a cold, then hay fever, but neither Lemsip or antihistamines would touch it. Then I got on the Beconase and it's really worked.

Obes, you may have to do some DIY lady garden tending. Hopefully though, you won't have to suffer your child staring at you, as B did this morning, pointing and laughing at "mummy's willy" blush. <disclaimer, I do not actually have a penis, he was just looking in the nether area in general>

Indith Tue 17-Jul-12 10:30:48

Rubes you poor thing, hope you feel better soon.

I miss shopping too, I'd love to be able to go without children, when I actually have some money to spend, somewhere there are actual shops with nice things in them. Here in Durham we have New Look, Topshop, BHS and FatFace. FatFace is ok but not the rest. Oh we also have Country Casuals and Viyella (sp?) for when I turn into a 65 year old country lady. The rest is a mix of superdry type or super expensive but not is a classy way type. Does my head in. Newcastle isn't much better either really. I end up shopping online in batches.

My shopping line just snapped. 2 loads on the floor. I could cry. I was just about to hang my whites in the sun too. Best get the stepladder out and see if I can cobble it together. I've just been to the bloody shopping centre too, why could it not have snapped before then I've have got a new one!

Rubena Tue 17-Jul-12 10:44:18

I've got the kids in bed with me. One with ipad, one with iphone and I have laptop blush Thanks Spot but no. I'm a state. Nobody wants to get this, ever. DS has had it but I don't think there's much I can do to shield dd.

Beans36 Tue 17-Jul-12 10:57:25

Spot, loving the mummy's willy chat. Clearly long on testosterone in your house. It's different here - v short on it.. DD1 asked DH: What's that sticking out of your fanny? Man how I laughed!

Poor Rubes. You sound miserable. Anyone you can call on to help out?

Just been for my weekly 7k run. Not sure what I'll do in the holidays. Think we'll do evenings instead. Or early mornings!

Need water x

Beans36 Tue 17-Jul-12 11:00:10

PS Obes have just looked on Cos website and their model looks terrible! I'm sure the clothes are nice, but they look ill-fitting on her!

Rubena Tue 17-Jul-12 11:33:38

I thought the same Beans. She's also got a look on her face like she's been made to do the photo shoot hungover. But I guess that's what they're going for.
Yes MIL came over Sunday and to be honest I just added anxiety to my list of ailments.

urbanewarrior Tue 17-Jul-12 14:36:25

Sorry to hear you're not well rubes. Sounds dreadful.

Ikea was quite the experience. Mainly because I left having only purchased 1 item shock prob because I spent 70% of time there arguing with the manger. Too boring. I am currently in one of those old school service stations on the m6, having just eaten a burger king (it's that old school) for the first time in about 8 years. Was actually quite nice and in one of those bridge over the actual motorway cafes. Reminds me of motorway trips in my mis-spent youth. Nostalgia in service stations - a new low in my capacity to be sentimental about every frickin thing. Although possibly trumped by ds who on discovering that I was going to be away last night getting our new car burst into tears at the thought of not seeing our old car again. He didn't give a toss about me being away <know my place>. And yay for the ttc%233s. Is bliss (if you have v low expectations and standards I expect). 15k trace? I take back what I said about running together grin

Right. Back on the road.

urbanewarrior Tue 17-Jul-12 14:39:02

Oh oh kiwi I heart the first dress. You would get a tonne of wear out of it I bet and DVf lasts beautifully. My chum has one she's had for years and worn to death and still looks v fantastic. Chloe one is meh. And stupid price. And obes I too love cos - most of work clothes come from there but then I favour an odd cut in a neutral colour <flattering> grin

urbanewarrior Tue 17-Jul-12 14:44:03

233? Err meant to be number 3 but hash tag gone a bit odd sorry. Don't think any of you are quite that mad...

McKayz Tue 17-Jul-12 15:10:51

I need a cry sad

DD was awake almost all night so I am shattered. Then I twisted my ankle again this morning and had to sit on a wall in York for almost an hour as I couldn't put weight on it. Then the bloody car failed it's MOT. We can't afford to fix it or buy a new one. DH is going to see if we can part exchange it for a cheap crappy thing until we get his bonus in January.

KiwiPanda Tue 17-Jul-12 16:56:13

Urbs Glad you agree! I still love it too, am still umming and erring. I heart DvF - my wedding dress was one of hers. That makes me sound posh doesn't it? It wasn't actually a wedding dress, it cost less than the full price pre-sale of that one I linked to! - it was just a lovely dress. We got married abroad in civil ceremony so it was perfect. I still have it of course but it's definitely a very special occasion dress.

Not a huge fan of COS (as they insist on capitalising it in their press releases) - the cuts always look a bit wrong on me. Clearly I need to spend more time taking drugs and partying so I look more like their model.

Poor Kayz being exhausted SUCKS. Everything will be better tomorrow when you have had a bit of sleep, fingers crossed. If someone can invent a teleporter in the next few hours I shall send you some of the homemade hot cross buns I've been making today* (with the assistance of DD2, who aided by emptying out the cupboard with all the spices in it onto the floor hmm

* DIsclaimer: never made them before, they might be disgusting...

Beans36 Tue 17-Jul-12 17:51:16

Oh Kayz, poor you. Big love.

Just been to local garden centre because it has free access to animals that the girls can pet. Who should be signing books, but Alan Titchmarsh. What a really nice man! Photo on FB

JamInMyWellies Wed 18-Jul-12 07:37:33

Morning all.

Kayz hope you had a better night last night.

Beans love the photo of you with titch. DH would be wel jel. grin

Obes I skimm read and in my head your vag wax got all mixed up with your haircut and nits into the most awful sentence on my head. gringrin. Have a super holiday!

Indith hows the building work going are you nearly done? Our 3rd baby conundrum would kinda force us into doing our extension.

Did I see a fleeting post by Trace the other day?

Vag most impressed by your running and swimming.

Went to see Madonna last night. What a disappointment. Have seen her previously and she was fab. But her set list was pants and she had messed around with a few of her old hits making them unrecognisable and rubbish. At least DH and I got a night out. grin

Right spose I had best get the boys ready for school. The most expensive curtains in the world are being delivered today. I hope I like them otherwise it's a very costly mistake.

Beans36 Wed 18-Jul-12 08:16:34

Ooh Jam, can you link to the material???
Such a shame Madonna was rubbish. Maybe she's getting a bit old and trying too hard to be cool, instead of sticking with the songs we all know and love?

DD2 up in the night. I did as instructed and just went in and settled her, no water even though she asked. She settled quickly and didn't wake up again. Maybe it's the start of new her. She'd slept through the two nights before!

Trace- any news on your house sale?

Rubes -how are you feeling today? X

McKayz Wed 18-Jul-12 08:42:33

I ordered that Dorothy Perkins dress yesterday for £16. They have 20% off all dresses today so it would have been £12.80. I can't cancel it though. Bums!!

Beans, I hope DD2 gets better at sleeping. Last night doesn't sound too bad.

KiwiPanda Wed 18-Jul-12 09:01:22

Kayz if you could be bothered, you could always return it and buy a new one today at sale price.. But if they charge postage I guess you might not end up saving that much.

Re the phonics conversation of a while ago, I listened to some of the Michael Rosen thing on BBC Radio 4 about it and can see the pros and cons, but DH bought this at a book sale for £20 (bargain) for DD1 and she LOVES it so far. I think it's so fab at this age how if they like writing/reading/letters they just have no concept that it's what we would call "learning" - DD just loves drawing, writing letters, writing words etc all equally. She regularly announces she is going to be a journalist like Mummy and Daddy. I did give her a lecture about falling advertising revenue and the death of the traditional media but she just didn't seem to get it wink

Today is wednesday which means art class. Hooray! But today is last one before lovely Anne who runs it has stop for summer holidays. Boo! Darn her childminder for wanting to spend time with her OWN CHILDREN. How selfish. I'm going to invite some of the mums and babies to have our own little class at my house instead. Won't have the childminders (they help entertain the babies while we do art/ chat/ eat cake) but I shall miss it so much otherwise.

Beans That sounds like progress on the night front..Fingers crossed it's a new pattern!

Urbs Hope you made it make from your NostalgiaFestIkea trip. I can never escape Ikea without buying a few things which seem to add up nevertheless to £73. Though since they stopped selling the pickled cucumbers I have less desire to go.

I made hot cross buns yesterday and they were really very nice, but they tasted a bit more like scones, too dense really. Lovely straight out of the oven and lovely toasted this morning but really more cakey than bready. Wonder what I did wrong. Any top baking tips?

Oh that's so annoying when that happens, kayz. Can it all count as part of your epically rubbish day yesterday and then you can start today afresh in the knowledge that things can only get better?

kiwi that art class sounds fab. Great idea to recreate at your house. No worries here re- T wanting to follow mummy and daddy into journalism. It's chef, train driver or town planner all the way, here. Still, I suspect people's eyes will light up at dinner parties when your DD tells people what she does, whereas here...not so much grin.

Sorry madge was disappointing, jam, maybe it is time she knocked it on the head. Glad you had a good night all the same...

Still exhausted recovering from holiday and trying to engage brain to do work. Talking of the holiday, I'll probably post some pix up on FB but please no mentions of its crapness as the people I went with will see it! grin

McKayz Wed 18-Jul-12 11:44:13

It's getting a little better. I've managed to persuade Vodafone let me upgrade my phone early and I didn't have to pay for the phone.

My Dad is having a pacemaker fitted. They've decided the reason he was having blackouts is because his heart doesn't beat properly or fast enough. It's a bit worrying but he doesn't seem bothered by it.

Beans36 Wed 18-Jul-12 12:45:23

Kayz - Dad had a pacemaker fitted about 10 years ago and it really revolutionised his life and gave him a whole new lease of life - he loves it! still! Fear not, it's a good thing. He just can't stand too near magnetic things!
x

VagolaJahooli Wed 18-Jul-12 16:39:06

Wow that's great news on the phone up grade Kayz, when was it due for renewal? I can understand why your worried, but really the worst bit is the post op recovery, otherwise as Beans says, he will have a new lease on life.

Shame about old Ms M being a bit naf Jam, but at least you got a night out.

Urbane ds1 gets very nostalgic about cars, he still gets a bit misty eyed whenever a Prius drives by and we had it in Derby. Worst though is when it's time to take the Christmas tree down, he sobs and often tries to hug the tree. Not easy with a big pine tree with very dry needles.

Speaking of Christmas my 18 year old niece is coming to spend 3.5 weeks with is over Christmas this year, we are all so excited, I adore my nieces and this one is a particular sweetie.

We are off to Rambouillet just south of Paris tomorrow. Very excited, I hope the weather improves esp for the final day of the Tour on Sunday.

Went for a nice run around the city this morning, it was supposed to be an evening session with the group but a couple of us are preferring morning runs so we have a rebel morning group now. I really can't believe how well I've taken to early morning exercise, I was very much against it. Apart from the obvious early waking thing, I also found I wasn't very effective in the morning, but now I really like it and love the energy i have first thing. I wish I'd been like this years ago, I think I would have lost the baby fat a lot quicker. Lady I have become obsessed with my BMI I have an app for it and my waist to height ratio. I am currently 25.33 that .17 loss is important.

Right gotta go we are out for dinner with friends tonight so have to get the boys fed and watered before the sitter arrives.

McKayz Wed 18-Jul-12 16:49:41

September Vag. The button on my iphone isn't working very well so I decided to ring and moan at them and it worked!

JamInMyWellies Wed 18-Jul-12 17:05:29

fabric for beans

Vag lovely pics on FB of your fab growing garden.

Kayz yay for new phone.

Am so lazy today have done bog all as it was my last Wed of no children till Sep so have watched some telly surfed the internet and ate chocolate. House is now a frigging mess.

LadyThompson Wed 18-Jul-12 17:40:05

Hellooooo, loads of posts again! Yay! I haven't been checking - was at Mum's for a few days, then really busy, then took the girls up to MIL's last night and we are not collecting them until SUNDAY. I am not keen about this ONE BIT. But DP has booked time off and we are trying to tackle all the shit in the house a bit and that sort of thing is just impossible with the girls. We are Skypeing a couple of times a day (well, we will be - we did one session this morning and will do another before bedtime tonight).

Rubes, I was so sorry to miss you on Monday, it's such a shame. How are you today? What a dose you've had sad

Loving the three talk. Still vacillating here....

Vag, am in Belge Thurs 26 to Sun 29. But we set off next Weds.

When we collect the girls on Sun, MIL and her DH are following us down and then staying for a couple of days. Not really what I fancy, but hey.

I have rudely blahblahed on about myself because I need to get back to tidying the kitchen, but I will be back for a catch up.

Beans36 Wed 18-Jul-12 17:51:52

JAM - LOVE LOVE LOVE THAT! BEAUTIFUL! WORTH EVERY PENNY!

Vag, think I will start doing morning exercise in the holidays as well. Need to keep going or else will stop over the summer and the thought of doing it in the new term will be horrific!

DD2 is currently charging around with her pushchair with various treasures she's found around the house secreted in it. With her big dangly nappy and filthy leggings and t-shirt. It's a sight to behold. And her Boris Johnson hair do in front of her eyes! Strange little beast. She shows no sign of tiring, despite having only recently given up her daytime sleep and having been on an hour's walk this afternoon and another 45mins of scootering in the close we live on!

DD1 is watching telly like a good girl. She's more exhausted than Pru! Such a good bear! Lucky me.

Lady - I insist you don't wake up until 9am tomorrow. You lucky lucky thing. I know you'll miss them, but the bliss of being able to get up when you wake up will be gorgeous! And it'll go so fast! I'm rather jealous. We're doing a Friday morning to Sunday afternoon next weekend and I can't wait! I do miss them, but I do love a bit of time off, so I can remember how much I love them! It's strange how quickly I can get back into the swing of not having children. Perhaps I am a terrible mother. Probably!!!

Hey, maybe you'll conceive number 3 in this time off!!!! Heh heh!

Right, must do bathtime.

Rubena Wed 18-Jul-12 18:14:22

Bummer about Madge Jam. Hers was the first ever concert I went to back home - shame.

Hi Beans, Flu symptoms going but eye infection had spread to other eye briefly however that settled but the original eye infected doesn't seem to be getting better and it's been antibiotic drops 2 hourly for 2 days now. it's like there's sand in it along with soreness and looks like I've been in a chlorinated pool too long according to dh. If not improving by morning I'm getting a sit & wait appt tomorrow. After saying the dd's do nothing but fight they have bee great today. DS teaching her loads of stuff and trying to teach her to say her stuff all day smile I think dd's sleeping sounds promising Beans- def stick with it. have been trying to decide what to do re dd waking at 11 for milk. Decided to wait a bit until she's solidly / consistently sleeping through after that one then drop that one as well.

Vag, that's great you have someone coming for Chrissy how nice. Always exciting. Haven't a clue what to do for our new found time off. Worried about getting on a flight post Olympics so that might be a factor, but could be worse
Would love to grow brocolli - never had luck at old house and haven't tried here. mil smuggly brought over her home grown stuff at the weekend. That reminds me - better give them a heads up I'm not better as many family decending on us tmrw for the dh's gm's birthday..... OK must go get bath on...

Rubena Wed 18-Jul-12 18:25:59

Cross posted with loads as that took me an age. Hi Lady - see above - I'm bummed about Monday too. We're quite busy now for a bit as well but hopefully we can squeeze something in. I need to learn how you just go with the mil plans - I get myself so worked up and then plan with dh about what to do / say way too much.
When my full health returns hmm I'm thinking of doing morning exercise too - the thought pains me, but I think that's mainly becasue I'm a "night person" but who really IS a "night person"? isn't that a pattern we've all just acquired after staying up later to watch certain TV programs? Or stress about things? I'm thinking surely if I was physically shattered I'd be asleep earlier therefore would naturally become a "morning person"! Hows that for waffling.....
I've wanted to rey it ever since Jam said she gets up and does all the coffee in the morning.... Right must do bath, and dd smells like a sewer....

Rubena Wed 18-Jul-12 18:27:22

rey it? Try it I mean

Beans36 Wed 18-Jul-12 21:22:00

I seem to watch 24hrs in A&E every week and it's so sad.

traceface Wed 18-Jul-12 21:51:36

hello smile
It's been busy on here!
Well our buyers pulled out sad But we are hatching plan involving us selling our house to my parents at a reduced price - all rather complex and not ideal (they live in Manchester and would rent out our house in York) but it means we should still be able to move. And parents are fabulous things. I feel very blessed to have mine and I hope I can do amazing stuff for my girls in the future too. I've been trying to stay cool and calm about the house thing but I am feeling quite anxious. Also I have a snotty cold. And a very busy week. And this evening I went out for tea with my work colleagues, as one of the girls is leaving, and decided to cycle there to save the hassle of parking the car. Anyway, I locked my bike up then realised I had forgotten my keys! I had to ask DH to drive down with my keys so I could unlock the bike to come home - doh! Which meant he had to ask someone to look after the dds while he came to my rescue - so really it would have been better to take the car! Then at the end of the meal I realsied I didn't have any money with me blush My boss paid for me and I will pay her back tomorrow. My head is just so full I'm about to pop!
We break up for the hols on Friday, and on Saturday I'm going away with 40 kids (one of them being my Lucy) on a church activity camp. I'm one of the leaders (eek!) and am looking forward to it but also haven't got my head around what I need to take or anything yet. I need some extra days this week!
Sorry for blahing on about me me me.
Kayz how are you feeling? Sorry you had such a crap day yesterday.
Nolda please don't be too harsh on yourself. like others have said, maybe a special trip out for a cake and a drink or something might help? And we don't always enjoy our children - but I'm learning that it comes in phases - sometimes dd1 is a delight and dd2 is really hard work, then other times they swap. There's nothing to gain from looking back and feeling guilty. Just take each day as it comes and some of them will be ok xxx
re the blue dress - it's nice smile But I'm one of those people who would have no idea of the value of clothes - I would not be able to tell a £20 frock from a £200 one!
rubes you poor thing - your eye sounds very sore sad Hope it mends soon.
Ah I just saw the time - must get to bed.
We've not seen jb or zj on this thread yet have we? And is wg still around? Anyone on FB still in contact?

VagolaJahooli Wed 18-Jul-12 22:36:54

Rubes, DH has had an evil eye infection that spread. If the drops don't have an effect within 24 hrs of starting them then you need to go back. The fact that it has spread is an undication that the ABs aren't working. Go back women. You need a more specific AB. It may come as an eye ointment, but will still work. You need to go tomorrow ASAP, you can do permanent damage if you don't sort it out. Babe you sound really worn down any chance of a rest for you? I'd love to come take the kids off you, but a bit tricky really. What with the distance an all.

I really need to sort out meeting up with you ladies. Anyone doing anything the Tuesday after next? I think it's the 31st.

Had a nice dinner with friends but man alive I'm tired. Watching TDF highlights, I've missed a couple of days.

Rubes, I am still a night person.

Trace, that all sounds like it will work out nicely. It is good your parents can help, but it is also a good investment for them. Your brain sounds like it has gone on the same holiday mine has. I'm am really dippy lately. When we go for a run in the morning I carry a bag and put everyone's bike keys in my bag. We have those locks which goes through the back wheel and is attached to the bike. When the lock is unlocked the keys stay in the lock on the bike. Anyway I collected the girls keys and off we went on our run. When we arrived back, I couldn't find my keys, where were they, of course still on my bike. They had sat there completely unattended with not just the bike key but all my other keys on it.

Right gotta go to be, nuff ramble from me.

McKayz Thu 19-Jul-12 08:19:34

Vag, I've got nothing planned for that day. Would really love to see you. It's been years!! DS2 was about 6 months old I think!!

What do you think about Frank Schleck? I couldn't quite believe it!

McKayz Thu 19-Jul-12 08:22:51

Trace, really sorry about your house. But it's good your parents can help you out. Will you still be able to get the house you wanted or has that had to stop because the others pulled out?

I have a keys story too. We got home the other day and DH got DD out of the car and I unlocked the house. About an hour later someone knocked on the door. I'd left the car keys in the outside of the door and the car was unlocked. Doh!! I felt very stupid.

KiwiPanda Thu 19-Jul-12 09:05:59

Vag Tuesday 31 sounds good to me too. Here is what it says on our calendar at home:

DD1: Nursery, play with toys
DD2: Crawl around, eat stuff
Me: Crawl around after DD2, remove stuff from her mouth
DH: Live blog Olympics women's gymnastics, swimming.

I think DH wins that one, eh?

Where were you thinking? Would suggest maybe not too central given Olympics mayhem, possibly Waterloo/ South Bank as that's worked quite well before??

McKayz Thu 19-Jul-12 09:09:32

Ah Vag, if you are in London I can't do it. But will certainly see you when you come over to Hull on ferry.

Do ignore me, I am struggling with DD and not making any sense. I think she might have colic as evenings are a bloody nightmare sad

Obergene Thu 19-Jul-12 09:45:37

I am officially pathetic. Am crying on the Tube because I just dropped the DDs off at school and nursery and said goodbye to their teachers for the last time. I love both their teachers this year and both are leaving the school. Last year DD1's teacher wasn't great which made me appreciate more this year's kind, attentive, energetic, encouraging but firm teacher even more.

No wonder my girls are bad with change. They clearly take after me. Must. Stop. Snivelling.

McKayz Thu 19-Jul-12 09:52:11

Obes, I will be in floods tomorrow. Especially at DS2's play school. He loves his key worker and she is absolutely amazing with him. I am dreading it and I cry thinking about it.

LadyThompson Thu 19-Jul-12 10:20:58

Chin up, Obes, you might strike lucky with the girls' teachers again next year smile I have to say, a lump is never far from my throat these days. It's since I had the girls.

Trace, I am so sorry that your buyers pulled out. But a massive round of applause for your parents! Wow! I hope it all works out. And 40 kids - jeepers creepers! Bet they'll have a great time. I know you're not a drinker but you will be needing a hip flask - maybe put squares of G&B in it?

Vag - 31st sounds ok for me. More or less anything after and including that is good.

Rubes - I am a night and a morning person! That's to say - I go to bed late most nights, as you probably know. But I do love the mornings as well. But only after my first cup of coffee grin And not before 7. How are you this morning? Vag is right. You are v run down and need to get proper stuff from the GP. Will text you with dates for cheering Reading lunch later.

To which end - Beans, I got up at 8.30 today, but I'd set an alarm as we have such a lot to do! Sleep is not the big luxury for me with the girls away as they are both big sleepers, and DD2 is only still in our room as she doesn't wake up until 7.30 at the very earliest (don't want to go on about it because I know so many are on their knees with lack of sleep and I am hugely sympathetic and also a bit sheepish). It's just the GETTING STUFF DONE without constantly having to attend to their needs. But I miss them horribly. And I think this is too long a stretch for them but am so desperate to try to make the house a little better, am putting up with it. Yes, I am sure DP will be expecting a little bedroom action hmm I have been neglecting our relationship in many ways over the last few months. I ought to make more effort. But that's a whole other story and I STILL haven't done my proper catch up as there were loads of people I wanted to respond to, such as Nolda - good to see you back!

Oh, and Trace - WG does the odd FB post, I think she is totally fine if a little busy!

Rubena Thu 19-Jul-12 11:11:13

Thanks Vag, Lady and everyone. Rang GP this morn and got an appt 45 min later shock she isn't sure if viral or Bacterial but probably not allergy. Has given a different antibiotic (which thankfully is twice a day rather than bloody 2 hourly) and said it may well just take 5 full days to clear up.
I'm feeling ok-ish with the other stuff and the flu symptoms almost gone.
Gotta run as everyone coming over (handy with contagious eye infection!)

I think I'm around that Tuesday Vag.

Sorry for the me-ish post - gotta a few things to do

Nolda Thu 19-Jul-12 11:17:41

Beans - With all the exercise she had yesterday, I hope your DD2 slept through.

Kayz - Good news about your phone and I hope all goes well for your dad.

Kiwi - It's so sweet that your daughter wants to be a journalist like her mummy and daddy. My DD has announced that she does not want to be a solicitor because you have to work at the weekend [DH take note]. Her pre-school teacher predicted that she will be either a teacher or world leader. We would be happy with either of those! By the way, I'm with you on the Ikea pickled cucumbers. My mother was always trying to get me to take her to Ikea for those. When we asked, we were told that there is some kind of cucumber famine! On the buns, it's a long time since I did any yeast bakery but I would guess they didn't rise properly (why? I don't know.)

Jam - Loving the curtains. Shame about the house being a mess but you're definitely entitled to make the most of your last moments of child-freeness before the summer holiday madness starts!

Lady - Hope you had a good time at your mum's. Sorry that you are missing your lovely girls but hopefully you'll get all your jobs done and feel uplifted.

Rubes - I'm glad that you got to see the doctor so quickly. Fingers crossed the new ABs work.

Trace - So sorry to hear that your buyers have pulled out. But hopefully all will work out with your parents buying your house. I'm not surprised that your head feels full up. Moving house is so stressful! Have a good time at the camp. I bet you'll have your hands full.

Obes - I'm like Kayz, anything sets me off and I don't have a baby as an excuse.

I think I may have to start with the morning exercise too, otherwise I'll never get a run in over the holidays. I am still doing Jillian Michaels work outs in the evening and have a press ups app on my phone. But definitely need the running too if I'm going to lose some weight. My BMI is 24.4 so just in the OK range but would like to lose about a stone. I was very shocked to discover that DH has a BMI of 27. He seems to carry all his excess flesh on his back (yuck) so would guess, as that's near his heart, it's not a healthy way to be. He says he can soon cycle that off but would cycling do that? He has not an ounce of spare on his legs, unlike me! Maybe we should swap and he does the press ups and I do the cycling?

Thanks for all the kind comments re DD and me. I'm planning to take her out for lunch followed by a trip to bubbles and beads (a shop in here where you can make necklaces etc that she's been bugging me to take her to for ages).

Indith Thu 19-Jul-12 14:34:59

Trace the house stuff sounds like a pain. Glad you seem to have found a solution though.

After dd was born the postman used to knock on my door almost every morning to hand me my keys blush. Here I just leave the doors unlocked half the time. Good job we live in a doors unlocked sort of village grin.

I need exercise! Supposed to be doing abdominal stuff (which also is good for pelvic area) daily but just not done it with builders and electricians here all the time. Mum brought my old bike up so need to have it serviced.

Last day of school for ds1 tomorrow. My baby is getting all big.

Ds2 growing again I think. Feeding all night anyway. Which would be fine as I can sleep and feed, I just roll over and latch onto the other side when he hits me but the big ones keep getting me up too and ds1 keeps getting up really early.

McKayz Thu 19-Jul-12 21:41:51

There was just a couple in a car on the main road outside my house making out!! Well a little more than that really. Lots of groping!! On a main road!!

I must be getting old!! I feel shocked. grin

ZuleikaJambiere Thu 19-Jul-12 23:33:23

Hello everyone, just marking my place on the new thread on returning from hols. I've been meaning to catch up all week, as DH has been away working, but the problem with that is getting both girls into bed on my own takes most of the evening and then I don't actually have time to catch up! Anyway, I have been lurking and have lots to say so will be back x

KiwiPanda Fri 20-Jul-12 09:02:43

Kayz On my running club on Tuesday nights we run a 1km circuit x 10. So obviously going past the same point ten times. It's on a bit of Common and every week, bar totally rainy ones, there's this couple who sit on a bench and get extremely frisky right by the public track.. It's somewhat disconcerting when you are trying to get in your zone and there they are .. blush

Hello ZJ! Do share your top tips for lots of solo bedtimes - I"m going to be doing them every night for about a month once the Olympics start.

I figured out why I'm obsessed with dresses BTW. It's because I want to wear something that I don't look at and think "Oh I can't wear that, couldn't feed in it" wink. I'm going to the Prom tomorrow night and am going to wear a dress that would be utterly impossible to feed in just cos I can.

KiwiPanda Fri 20-Jul-12 09:36:24

ps I have started a war of attrition on my opposite neighbours. A week or so ago I went to a PR thing where we made our own bar of chocolate. They finished it off in their kitchen etc and sent it to us at home. I just found out they put the wrong house number on it, sending it instead to house opposite. Still with my name on obviously. So, these people opposite have kept it. Now obviously they don't necessarily know my name but they haven't made any effort to find out as both their neighbours either side will know who I am by name IYSWIM. I've put notes through their door and knocked but nothing. They are chocolate thieves and I will not let them get away with it!!

McKayz Fri 20-Jul-12 11:29:27

I'm about to go get DS2. sad he's too little to finish play school!

Beans36 Sat 21-Jul-12 07:28:09

Morning All. So, school's out.

DH snoring away upstairs and girls and me up since 6. Joy. I am currently furious with him, as usual.

DD2 been up every night since Tuesday and I've been trying to implement our new tough regime, which I have explained to DH. I know he finds my chat about the girls boring when he gets home from work, but I listen patiently to his blah about work, because it's what he does. At least he should have some personal interest in his kids, but clearly not.

Anyway, last night, I was trying to leave her and he got up to go to her almost immediately. She has worked out how to get out of her sleeping bag, so was under a duvet for the first time. He went in before she'd reached crux point, despite me trying to tell him not to. Then he picked her and cuddled her and gave her water. No big deal and rather nice of him, you'd think. BUT I've told him that we're trying to break this sleeping (or lack thereof) pattern and he just hasn't listened. He gets up once in a blue moon and seems to think that he's some kind of fricking wonder for doing it and deserves a medal, when I do it about 3 times a night, minimum. It has been two years and I am tired! I just want him to help me and act as a unit and be consistent, but he doesn't listen to a word and takes us back to square one. I'm done. I must have slept through the night for about a whole month since DD2 was born, which is better than some, I know, but I'm just so cross.

Anyway, sorry, blahing on. But he didn't even just do it quietly so I could keep on sleeping, like I do for him. He came back in and announced that he'd been deep asleep, how annoying. I gave him what for and we ended up having a shout at eachother at 2am. Joy. I lay awake fuming for about 2 hours! He's off to work today, so I have another bloody lovely day with the girls.

YAWN!

ZuleikaJambiere Sat 21-Jul-12 09:50:39

Oh Beans lovey, what a crapola start to the holidays. Does your DH know how much money he's pissing down the drain, by ignoring the sleep consultants advice! I'm with you on not relishing the prospect of so much time without groups or pre school to break the monotony. The girls and I have definitely spent too much time in each others company this week without a break. My DH has come back from his week away with the right intentions, so he deserves some credit compared to your DH, but he is making me fume anyway. He offered me a lie in, but the girls woke at 6 so he hid under the duvet to eke out his sleeping time while I fed DD2 and DD1 jumped on me. At 7.15 he finally took DD1 downstairs, and I had to follow him as he'd forgotten DD2. Then I got precisely 12 minutes peace before DD1 came back to see me for the first time (she managed 3 more visits for a chat in the next 40 minutes). And instead of coming downstairs and shutting the door to give me a tiny bit of quiet in between visits, they played races on the landing. Argh! I gave up at 815, some lie in. He's now offered to take DD1 out for the morning and take her for lunch, to give us a break from each other - which again is a nice thought, but that leaves me and DD2 alone in a tip of a house (from their playing), so actually I'm jealous of their trip. There's no pleasing me today!

Beans36 Sat 21-Jul-12 12:14:57

Humph ZJ, I feel your pain. That is rubbish. I even made DH croissants and fruit salad for breakfast and kept girls downstairs til 8.15 when he made an appearance. Over 2 hrs extra sleep. I do feel sorry for him being in work when the weather is this nice. But I am so tired, I could do with him here, so I could put my feet up.

Anyway, have had an apology, a thank you and a promise of lie in tomorrow, which I'm taking!

Been to shops with girls this am and got them bedside lights from Laura Ashley these ones to match their ceiling lights. Reduced to £15 each. Brill! And a really tacky little bedside table for DD2, which was £14.99 froma shop called B&M Homestores. Has anyone heard of it? Amazingly cheap. Quite nasty, but the odd nice bit if you look hard enough!

Rearranged DD1's bedroom, which looks fab now. Am v pleased! Sad me. Then ice creams on way back, which went everywhere. What an error.

Am now ready for bed! And off to I laws for lunch tomorrow. AGAIN.

Lady, how is the clear out going?

Rubena Sat 21-Jul-12 12:43:57

That's a bit crap Beans. I'd be royally pissed off he won't stick to the plan. All for nothing otherwise. DH sticks to my plan usually as he has this amazing ability to block out anything (including me nagging) so doesn't really stir.
ZJ- dh also crap at giving me a lay in (learning though!) - he does but forgets and the next thing he's watching the Tour and the kids have worked their way back upstairs without him realizing, but I cut him slack - he's working again today then has the kids all day tomorrow as I work tonight. DD now sleeps usually after waking once at 11 for milk, but the last 2 nights hasn't and I've linked the pattern that she also didn't eat her dinner so clearly hungry and came out of her room in a rage like a little girl possessed at 330 this morning, but dunno what else to do when she flatly refused her tea.
Love the lamps Beans. I bought DD a bed off eBay that was from Belle Maison and got it at a steal, then saw a matching bedside table in their shop and even as a second is more expensive that the bed I bought!

I'm feeling much better. Don't know if it's the new AB's or would have got better on it's own but just glad to feel / look a little more normal the last couple of days!
Such a busy week coming up for dd's birthday and on the same day all dh's rellies arrive although not staying with us for much of their stay, I still need to get some cleaning done and present wrapping and everything associated!

Nolda Sat 21-Jul-12 12:50:36

Sorry to hear that your DH has been such a idiot but at least he's had the decency to apologize before he swanned off to work. I can't believe you made his breakfast!

Your girls' bedrooms must be very cute, lovely lamps.

DH and I have been enjoying our child-free staycation. Separate work outs this morning and we're looking forward to a mutual delousing later as DS has nits!! Oh the romance!

Nolda, am v impressed with your workouts this morning (unless that's a euphemism, <cough, cough>). Hope you had a romantic delousing this evening. Was there wine and delicious food involved?

BEans, I too would have been pissed off, esp as your DH isn't too hot at getting up in the night normally, as you say. I hope you can return to the plan tonight. Having been pleased at B sleeping through earlier on this week, he's back to his usual tricks of waking every hour then up for the day at 5. angry

So glad you're feeling a bit better, Rubes. Can't believe it's your DD's birthday already! Can we arrange for you guys to come over and see us soon?

I've finished my book now and DP is editing it for me. I'm going to put a request out on the Mental Health boards for people who might be up for reading the draft for me and giving feedback. (It's a practical, self-help book about postnatal depression and motherhood in the first year). It's only short, and if anyone here would be up for having a read-through and letting me know if there was anything they did/didn't like or felt had been overlooked, please PM me. Muchas Gracias.

Talking of which (Spanish), T is big time into Dora and Diego. It's great for his linguistic skills but I keep being lassoed <sigh>

KiwiPanda Sun 22-Jul-12 05:25:29

Aghhhh out lateish so naturally DD2 up at an early-even-by-her-standards 4.45 sad after having been up most of night between 1-4. This of course coincides with day 2 of the 25 in a row that DH is working and therefore I have to do early mornings and bedtimes and all the stuff in between.

Oh and naturally she's so tired she won't be put down aghhhh

McKayz Sun 22-Jul-12 07:51:27

Beans, I hope your DH was more helpful last night. It's hard doing it all alone and hopefully he'll start helping more. I hope you're having a lovely lie in.

I'm sorry there seems to be lots of non sleeping DCs about. DD wouldn't go back to sleep last night. In the end DH stayed awake holding her so I could get some sleep.

DS2 fell out of bed last night and stayed asleep. How do you fall out of bed with a huge thud and stay asleep?

Indith Sun 22-Jul-12 11:40:21

Kayz I have no idea! I have found mine asleep in all manner of odd places before grin

Kiwi that is bloody early! Hope she doesn't make a habit of it!

Spot I'd love to have a read, had a hideous first year or so with dd.

Beans I hope you've managed to have a good chat with dh, sounds like he is being a bit of an idiot.

Can I add dh to the idiot list please? In his defense he is pretty good at getting up early. Anyway, this morning ds2 woke at 5. I cuddled and played and fed him til 6 then handed him to dh knowing that hbe would be leaving at 8 to go rowing so I had 2 hours to sleep. Bliss! 7am dh comes in saying ds2 was fussing and hungry. Erm no dh he is not hungry he is cold because you've taken his sleeping bag off and left him in his vest with nothing else on and he is tired because he has been up since 5am angry so even my sleep in was interrupted.

Ds2 has gone from starting to self settle a few weeks ago to pretty majopr 4 month sleep regression, he is all busy discovering things and learning new tricks his brain is too busy for sleep, the poor boy tries but just can't get there.

VagolaJahooli Sun 22-Jul-12 17:51:44

Argh, I wrote you all a lovely long message yesterday in a very jolly state after downing a bit of Kir vin blanc. But my phone battery ran out and lost the whole blurry post. Now I can't remember. I think I said something about Kayz & Rubes.

Anyhoo wasn't that interesting. Was feeling warm and happy, boys had found some kid to play with at the campsite who was staying in a cabin and who was an only child and the parents seemed to quite happy to have our two at theirs half the afternoon, I think it was the novelty of extra children.

We've had a lovely weekend, I love Rambouillet, and was a bonus being so close to the start of the first day. We just packed up this morning had a little swim then headed into the town centre got to see Mr Wiggins up close and my eye candy fav Tomas Voeckler had a last minute jersey change at the start line, oh those French boys know how to keep the ladies happy. Anyway after watching the start there, we then flew into Paris just in time to see them in Paris. Unfortunately we didn't get enough time to get ourselves into the tulleries before the roads closed off around it, as there is a little fair there which is good for the kids but it is so sunny and hot today so we still had a nice time.

Nolda I had a giggle at Spots interpretation of your 'separate workouts'. What did you use to delouse, did it have pleasant scent to put you in the mood.

Lady would the Wednesday be better for you as you will only be just back from Bruxelles? I can do Southbank, I'd forgotten about the 'lympic stuff disrupting, I was hoping to meet Urbane & Urbaneboy in greenwich park, but I imagine the upperclasses will be watching the horses. Should we all do a pilgrimage to Brighton?

Beans that is very annoying of your DH, I think there are so many ways to do things to change behavioural traits and issues with sleep but none of them will work unless both parents sign up. You shouldn't be making breakfast, you should beating him soundly about the head & body.

Right better chat to DH we are stuck in traffic outside Lille.

Indith Mon 23-Jul-12 07:33:49

Ah nothing quite like an up the back poo to get your morning off to a good start grin

McKayz Mon 23-Jul-12 07:48:41

We had one of those in the car yesterday. You could tell that it was a bad one from the sound of it grin

VagolaJahooli Mon 23-Jul-12 10:18:28

No up the pack poo here but loads of unpacking to do and it is gloriously sunny and I just want to go to the beach.

JamInMyWellies Mon 23-Jul-12 10:30:28

Hurrah for the first day of the holidays and the sun is shining! gringrin

Action packed week planned with lots of paddling pool and beach action. Gawd bless you mother nature.

Nolda Mon 23-Jul-12 11:08:49

Oh yes, the joys of up the back poo! Another reason why I'm glad mine are older now. However, Eddie does love to spray the loo, his clothes and the floor when he does a wee!

The delousing was good in that neither of us appeared to have any. I think we caught DS v early so hopefully it's all sorted now.

DH and I had a lovely weekend. The workouts were actually genuine workouts: cycling for DH and Jillian DVD for me but I assure you that DH has not gone short wink. The weather was glorious and we went for a short cycle ride to watch a bit of the J Class regatta on Saturday afternoon and on Sunday morning I went sailing for the first time since I fell pregnant with DD, so nearly 7 years ago! Was very relieved that I could still fit in my wetsuit. Although I'm very grateful that I'm able to be a SAHM, it has been pretty full on recently with quite a lot of weekends solo as DH has been working and the hard times with DD ... Anyway, feeling very refreshed and ready for the first week of the holidays. Having said that, so far this morning I've had my door keys returned to me by neighbour, as I'd left them on the windowsill while I was watering the plants and I turned up for DS's tennis lesson to find that it's actually tomorrow.

Vag - Glad to hear you had a good time. Those cyclists are seriously skinny, I hope Wiggins gets to eat some cake this week!

Jam I think we need to make the most of the weather, I've heard it's back to poo next week.

KiwiPanda Mon 23-Jul-12 13:46:29

Hello all, hope everyone enjoying some sunshine wherever they are. We went fruit picking with nursery friends yesterday so I am making mountains of rasberry frozen yoghurt and cheesecake.

Quick request, can everyone please play with this lovely interactive Olympics thing my very clever DH devised? Am very proud of him.

What's all this chat of back poos everywhere? You feral lot.

Glad you had plenty of action wink and feel refreshed, Nolda.

Vag, yay, come to Brighton! Pretty, pretty please. Noice weather and beaches n all.

Indith that would be just great. DP still doing a bit of tidying up (and removing my apparently over-frequent references to wine grin) but I hope I can sling it over to you by the end of the week.

McKayz Mon 23-Jul-12 14:35:08

Kiwi I have just wasted 20 minutes playing on that game thing. grin

KiwiPanda Mon 23-Jul-12 15:07:34

Hooray Kayz that's the spirit! I like the animals bit you can unlock on Facebook. Thanks! xx

JollyBear Mon 23-Jul-12 15:23:24

Just marking my place. We've been on rainy Devonian hols, first day back at work today. Back later!

KiwiPanda Mon 23-Jul-12 15:58:51

Vag if we change meet up to Wednesday could it be afternoon please? I can't do the morning, though of course I could come along later if you start earlier ;)

I'm taking the girls to watch the Olympic torch relay this afternoon, since I just realised it basically passes the end of our road. I suspect it will be somewhat underwhelming spectacle. However DD1 will be happy as I have made ridiculous amounts of puddings/ ice creams. And the way to DD1's heart is via cake. grin

Indith Mon 23-Jul-12 18:24:32

Oh dear me i made the mistake of going to the shops in the car this afternoon, just 20 mins each way. Dd bloody well slept BOTH ways! I'm going to have her bouncing off the ceiling until midnight.

I'm so tired my body feels like it will fall apart if someone pokes me. ds had better get over this sleep regression soon! On the plus side dh being away tonight means ds and I get a whole king size bed to ourselves so as long as the big ones sleep I should get a decent night.

Rubena Mon 23-Jul-12 21:49:39

Caught the tail end of some back poo chat and still have the odd dd one but am too pleased to be over that stage for the most part! Thought I had recovered fully by Fri so went to work, nice pampering on arrival, long sleep then woke to complete carnage in the other 'good' eye. No pain though, just looked horrendous. Thought a 9 hour flight home may have done me in, but still holding up. So fed up of eye issues! Big week ahead so bloody hope eye issue resolves quick smart! Bloody lovely weather though!!!!
Must think about bed after Big Brother now, so more later.

Rubena Mon 23-Jul-12 21:51:04

Sorry for over usage of 'bloody'

Rubena Mon 23-Jul-12 21:54:09

Oh and I meant I got the all clear from the GP and felt fine by Fri but didn't go to work until Sat (late eve) so at least TWO days seemingly fully recovered - how does that then suddenly jump to the other eye? Anyway, DH reckons cross contamination, but I felt fine for a solid 2 days!!
Am rambling... sorry

VagolaJahooli Mon 23-Jul-12 22:39:41

Ouch Rubes, that's annoying. It isn't that long, to have a contamination, bloody annoying though. Poor you, that is all just poo. I'm interested in your work though, you go to work and get a pampering and a long sleep. I love being a SAHM but I'd give it up in a heartbeat if that was my job.

A friend very kindly came and got the boys so I could sort the house out and gave them tea. But then after they got back DS2 demanded a movie, to which I said no. He proceeded to scream at me for ages, and ages!! I really don't know what to do with him sometimes.

Kiwi, I can do Wednesday afternoon. What are everyone else's thoughts.

Indith Tue 24-Jul-12 07:23:36

Oh dear Rubes.

To add to poo talk at 2.15am I went into dd who was crying "I've lost my lions". The girl will never get out of bed she just calls out and gets louder and louder and more and more cross. Anyway as I went in the door the stench hit me. She must have done a poo in her sleep/just before she went to sleep. Lovely. Then when i had finished sorting her out and got back to cryings ds2 i had to change his nappy, pjs and sleeping bag.

Been up since sparrow's fart yet again but I kind of linke this time without the big ones. It is bright and sunny, I have one wash load out and another in the machine as the electrician is coming again today so I need to get it all done before he turns th epower off!

KiwiPanda Tue 24-Jul-12 09:06:09

Morning all. Our trip to watch the torch relay yesterday was somewhat marred by an absolutely epic strop by DD1 (first one in ages, she's really chilled out recently) - massively overtired I think since she's been getting up earlier and earlier. Culminated in her weeing all over herself in the street blush - fortunately just around the corner from our house - and then me putting her to bed at 6.15pm. Ah well, she did say sorry to me this morning for being so grumpy.

I have hideous hayfever today. It must be incredibly high pollen from something or other as I never normally get it - which makes me think people who normally do get it must be absolutely in bits today. ugh.

JamInMyWellies Tue 24-Jul-12 09:13:11

Kiwi must have been the day for it yesterday. DS2 went bananas when we had to go pick up DH from the station took 20 mins of brute force to get him into his carseat then he climbed out while I was driving. shock Another 20 mins of force again then he calmed down and went to bed immediately we got home and slept for 12 hrs strait [double shock

Rubes sorry your eyes are still buggered. I know you work v hard on your flights but I am soooo jealous of your spa time.

Indith I too love that little bit of time before the boys wake. Its just so peaceful.

Another day in the garden today wanted to take the boys to the beach but their new waterslide has won. So that means today I will be touching up the paintwork on the garden tables and chairs. Exciting life I lead. Although I do have a little excitement in a couple of wks. My DSIL is taking the fellas for the weekend and DH and I are going to go to Paris. So fab have never been before so if any of you have I need Paris recommendations of things to do places to eat at hidden gems.

VagolaJahooli Tue 24-Jul-12 10:15:13

L'orangerie!!! Most amazing Monets and lots of other important artists of the impressionist era. Eating I'm not much good on as it has been years since I've been there without children, the places we went to are a distant memory. These days it tends to be crepes on the Champs-Elysee. There is an area around the George Pompideau(sp) gallery that we stayed at that had lovely little restaurants. Can't remember any names though.

Wow I can't believe DD1 apologised the next day. DS2 barely remembers screeching at me 5mins after he has done it.

VagolaJahooli Tue 24-Jul-12 10:17:40

Oh and drink Kir royals until they are coming out ya ears!

Rubena Tue 24-Jul-12 10:29:41

I think the heat makes these kids tantrum more than usual. DH collected kids from nursery yesterday and said they went into total meltdown when he stopped at Sainsburys. I was home shortly thereafter and they went to bed not long after - out like lights.
Yes but I must admit, I still don't always love going to work, but once I'm on my way and I know the kids are sorted I quite like it. I'm cutting back as much as possible though these days! I only actually went to get an eyebrow threading at the salon (from the pro's themselves) but when you see the prices in even a 5 star hotel (plus a big discount in our contract) over there it's very hard to leave the spa at all and ended up with the threading, a 1 hour 'royal' pedicure and 30 min Indian head massage plus shampoo and treatment all for about £20 including a tip! I feel very lucky.

Thanks Vag that's good to know it can last longer. I'm fed up - actually looks like both eyes are a little cloudy and red today.

Spot - YES! I cannot believe this turning 2 already thing either! Madness. Would love to sort out a day to come your way def - will get back with some dates but I think Aug is a bit busy - I think I am around that day Vag mentioned though - the 31st was it? What is the plan for that?

I'm loving this weather! Must go as I have to collect my friend from the station for a kiddie play / hair and some bubbly in the sun day grin
We have a tree surgeon chopping down a massive one outside dd's window which is proving great entertainment! Hope they stay all day grin

Indith Tue 24-Jul-12 11:05:16

We went to Paris when I was pg with ds1. I don't actually like it much, I don't really do big cities and it feels so hard to escape the traffic in Paris. Anyway, one night we were looking for somewhere to eat, we had just taken the metro to an area that the guidebook said there were lots of restaurants in and we walked around. There were not lots of restaurants, I got hungry and grumpy in the way a pregnant woman deprived of her dinner does and dh carried on marching around looking at places and rejecting them all (he is a food snob, wrong table cloths, pictures on menus and various other things make him reject places). Finally, walking down rue des pyrénées (metro of the same name) we came accross a place that does couscous and pizza and decided to sit down. A guy came out and explained that they cook one thing each night and everyone eats the same. We shrugged and went for it. That night was couscous night.

Amazing

He brought out a whole load of drinks and when I said I was pg he came back with an armful of non alcoholic drinks left over from a cousin's wedding or something. First up were lovely parcels of filo pastry stuffed full of yummy things. Then several different bowls of couscous, sauces and a platter full of sausages, kebabs, chops and so on. Then as we rested our stuffed bellies came a massive bowl of iced water filled with cherries and a whole fruit crate full of dates. As the evening progressed the place filled, everyone seemed to know each other it was real local place.

I almost don't want to know if it is still there or not, I'd hate to ruin the magic. It really was one of the best and most memorable meals of my life.

KiwiPanda Tue 24-Jul-12 11:50:28

Jam To add to Vag's cultural tips, the Rodin Museum is lovely as well. It's in his old house and has really lovely gardens. Am no good for restaurant recommendations as Paris is pretty grim for vegetarians but if want cheap and cheerful food on the go, the Felafel from the Rue des Roisiers ( L'As du Fallafel) is great. That area (the Marais) is pretty good for cafes, people watching and generally wondering around too.

VagolaJahooli Tue 24-Jul-12 15:08:53

I have to admit when in Paris we often eat in Chinese or italian restaurants, DH finds french food quite bland (ie not enough chilli for his burnt taste buds) and we often found that frenchwaiter s flately rused ti o understand the french for vegetarian. At least at Chinese places DH could basically tell them what we wanted so no need for menus and we got loads of yummily cook veg. However, we have often come across some lovely studenty looking crepe houses and have never gone hungry in those. I do love Paris, don't try to rush around and see everything in one foul swoop, maybe take a seine river cruise, or decide what you want to focus on, art, or shopping or just plain old site seeing. Also the number 25 bus from gare le'est train station goes past the bit where you can walk up to sacre coere (I've spelt that wrong but is thbig church on a hill and it is worth a visit), it also passes moulin rouge and le chat noir, (abn tnn take aoto fro from the bus) it goes around the arch de triomph and then terminates at the museum which is on the other side of the river from the Eiffel tower. It's a cheap way to do a city tour of Paris. I don't know if your DH is into cars but there are severams amos elyseepson champs Elysée which can be worth a look. Though we mainly use tjem to keep the boys happy on the champs. There is a big cemetary that has some famous people buried in it but I can't remember the name of it, it's near the catacombs. I'm also desperately trying to remember an area I went clubbing in with some friends once because it was quite fun, but the name eludes me.There is a big cemetary

KiwiPanda Tue 24-Jul-12 15:11:41

Vag Pere LaChaise? (sorry can't do accents on iPhone grin)

Beans36 Tue 24-Jul-12 16:32:53

Hello - very quickly just marking my place. Indith was it you who did the back poo or one of your children?

Been to a friend's down in Winchester, which was lovely. Spent yesterday picnicing by river and paddling, then onto PYO strawberry place and after home. Girls knackered with no sleep for either. Still tired today for DD1, who had a sleepover with her friend and they didn't go to sleep til 9pm. YAWN! I was asleep by 10. Was heavenly.

Got back this morning and I've set up the paddling pool at the end of the slide in the garden. The girls are loving it! Brilliant! Was my Dad's idea. What will I ever do without him?

He's seeing the radiologist today. Fingers crossed the new tumour is treatable.

Right, must bog off. Am v jealous of child-free time, NOlda - sounds lovely!

xx

Indith Tue 24-Jul-12 18:02:17

Oi! I have not pooed myself for many years I'll have you know. Labour doesn't count right?

JumpJockey Tue 24-Jul-12 18:24:22

<sneaks in quietly> Hello ladies! Have been hopelessly absent but trying to keep up on FB just about. Am still at work, booo. DH just sent me a photo of the DDs in ice cream heaven, v jealous.

So from a quick catch up skim there are lots of people thinking about #3?! And good news from Beans's dad smile And Kayz has massive waps grin

News from us - not much really. I have a new nephew in Scotland smile but SIL very much not in touch - keep sending her messages to say how's it all going, but no reply. Hope she's just busy adoring the new baby rather than utterly knackered all the time.

DH off to Germany end of next week so my first full-on one-parent experience <quake>

oh and how come so many of you are amazing runners?! And more to the point, how do you ever find the time?

Rubena Tue 24-Jul-12 19:47:59

fab day of lovely company, bubbly & hair ended up in quick dash to GP with eye situation suddenly worsening. GP did dye and all the rest. No abrasion. Thinks infection from insect or something gone in eye and def bacterial plus second drops ineffective and original not used long enough (reckons locum doc should have not given second drops) typical. It's angry angry red and sore now. Urgh.
Alcohol currently numbing it.
Have ordered dd this for her b'day as had 25% off coupon.
Hi JJ - no number three in a month of Sundays here.
Hmm Paris - love it. That said, have only been when very young and did all the obvious things, then in recent times visited family who were there so can't really advise, but I do love it.
Beans I've had that idea with the paddling pool - do you have a soft sided one? We just had a have a hard one which doesn't really work for that. Had it out today and both the boys just ganged up on DD and kept squirting her with the hose reducing her to tears poor thing. She has recovered though.

Rubena Tue 24-Jul-12 19:50:08

was thinking at the time when GP mentioned insect that I was out (ahem) slowly shuffling running and do remember a bug flying in my eye awhile back then rubbing it a lot and the time kind of coincides - duh.

KiwiPanda Tue 24-Jul-12 21:18:59

Rubs I've just been running and fairly sure I swallowed a fly or two. I seem to recall this did not end well for the lady in the song. AND I'm a vegetarian grin . Hope the eye will now improve with proper treatment.

Hello JJ! I run when DH gets home from work or at the weekend. When I'm back at work will be mostly at lunchtime though, plus running club on sat am (is 5 mins from my house which helps)

Ugh I have rotten head cold now. Started as allergy this morning and now just streaming and all cotton woolly in head. Boring!

LadyThompson Tue 24-Jul-12 23:22:23

And of course, I have NO time and haven't done catch up and we are going away tomorrow (off to Kent to stay with DP's uncle then getting Eurotunnel to go off to Belgium).

Good to see you poking your head around the door, JJ! Rubes - the eye thing sounds frightful. Hope this is the last of it.

We did get some work done/clearing out done on the house - the kitchen and the living room look considerably better and this is good as they were amongst the worst and of course also the ones we use the most. The girls were basically ok at MIL's although she has been grating my nerves a bit as usual...(but I feel ungrateful to think those thoughts)...

Well, it's going to have to be an epic catch up on my return! Back on Sun night. Ciao ciao lovely ladies.

ZuleikaJambiere Tue 24-Jul-12 23:22:32

<sneaks in behind Jump>

... And so almost another week has passed since I promised to catch up, but better late than never.  I will start with my top tip on solo parenting as requested by Kiwi, which is don't take my advice, if I was any good at it I'd be on here every evening and not trying to meet myself coming backwards!

Lots of good news - tinyKayz is clearly thriving, Beans' Dad's arthritis (if arthritis is good news?) and B Spot sleeping through

Sorry to hear that Rubes' eyes are still sore, ouch, and Spot's holiday shock, you couldn't make it up! And Trace, how very, very annoying about the house, but hurrah to your wonderful parents

Vag I'm not far from Hull at all, a Northern meet up would be great. Do come over!

A late entry into Jam's wall gate poll - we hardly seem to have walls in this village, but if we did DD1 would no doubt ignore me completely and do the opposite of what I wanted. I like to think I'd say no, but in reality I'd probably just sigh and puck another battle. On the road to pre school, the houses have their numbers on their front gates and DD likes to count as we go passed each gate. But if any gates are open she takes it upon herself to shut them, while I just flap uselessly and/or pretend she's not mine.

Nolda I feel about DD1 as you do about your DD, I love her but often I don't like her - which is terrible. I think we are too alike and we can definitely spend too much time in each other's company, like last week -DH did take her out for the day on Saturday and it's done us the world of good. I don't know if it's just a 3 year old thing (if so, I dread my peaceful, happy, lovely baby turning into a 3 year old) or a personality thing (if so, I dread getting to the point where I feel I'm getting a favourite). No answers for you, but I'm happier knowing I'm not alone

Lots of talk of no 3, which is exciting.  I'd love another, but not sure DH would agree. It's a mark of how easy DD2 is that I'd go for another right now if I could - it took 2 years for us to contemplate another after DD1!

Marvellous tip about cutting a vest for BF Indith, I had never thought of that but will be getting my scissors out now

How is the house looking after your hard working weekend LadyT?

Happy  hols (and shagging!) to Obes

Have you tracked down your chocolate yet Kiwi?

I did lurk on the end of the old thread, but can't remember that far back now, in the busy fog of what has been my sisters wedding (fab, fab day and DD1 was the most beautifully behaved bridesmaid) and holiday (equally fab - DD1 said today 'I miss our holiday house', so do I). 

DD1 had her jabs today and was very brave and made me proud of her, although I'd promised her an ice cream afterwards and she declined so I missed out as well, unfair! Last week we got a school report from pre school, which seems far too grown up. All was good and it said how well she's settled and is starting to make friends and immerse herself in activities, so I was really happy as that's all I wanted to hear. Actually, when I read this paragraph back I realise DD1 is great and it's just in the moment I often want to tear my hair out!

In DD2 news, we've started offering her food this week, since we felt she was trying to tell us something when she took a great chomp of my ham and mustard sandwich last week! We've decided to go down the BLW route this time as I'm lazy and can't be arsed with separate cooking and pureeing and she seems to be enjoying it. So far she's sucked on new potato, carrot, avocado, banana and pepper - any suggestions for other good things to offer? But bless her, she's such a dot she can't see over the tray on her high hair, even with a cushion, so she has this great technique of holding down the food so it's half on, half off the tray, then flinging her head forward with mouth open wide, its very cute!

Right, must be time for bed. Night all

KiwiPanda Wed 25-Jul-12 08:47:03

ZJ I think our DDs must be pretty similar. Took us ages to contemplate DD2 but she is such a little chilled out poppet that having sworn beforehand there was no WAY I would have a third, I am now softening to the idea (though still only a vague possibility). Re BLW - porridge fingers always went down well with my two, both BLW-ers. Actually I've been doing a bit of spoon feeding with DD2 as she lets me - DD1 wouldn't let a spoon near her mouth EVER so absolutely everything was proper solids from the word go, but DD2 is very partial to a bit of porridge or lentil dahl so we do that too. Fruit is of course always a winner. Peas are brilliant for practicing that pincer grip..

I also make lollies and ice cream quite a lot now. Basically just frozen smoothies with fresh fruit which DD1 is sceptical of (essentially because it's not a mini milk..) but DD2 absolutely loves - I freeze it in tiny little weaning pots and then let it melt a bit and feed it to her as a slush which she adores. Maybe the cold helps with teething too.. (Am assuming she's teething simply because she's 9 months and has no teeth yet, but no sign of them either..)

Mine were BOTH up at 4.40am today. Ugh. DD1 is going to be SO hideously grumpy by 5pm. Does anyone have any suggestions re early waking? I'm kind of resigned to it with DD2 as she's only a baby and I'm sure it will change at some point anyway, but DD1 is getting up earlier and earlier, then is massively overtired and hideously grumpy by late afternoon. If I put her to bed early, she just gets up even earlier. Any ideas??

Beans36 Wed 25-Jul-12 10:00:49

Hi Kiwi - we're getting DD1 a clock from Mothercare that shows them when it's time to get out of bed. I think it's called a Groclock - anyway, it's here and meant to be quite good. But only, I guess, if your DD1 is happy to do as told. The other thing my friend does it put her DD to bed with a few books in her bed and tells her under no circumstances to come out until called to on pain of no treats!! Can you put her to bed later? It works with our DD1, but not DD2.

So, sadly have had bad news on Dad. Honestly, this is like emotional rollercoaster from hell. He met with the radiographer yesterday and the new tumour in his leg is very aggressive and growing very fast. As a result, he now needs 3 weeks of radiotherapy, not the 5 days as originally thought. So it means he won't be able to get his final summer in North Wales, where he loves so much. Fortunately, he popped up for a week last week and managed to play some golf and go sailing, but he won't get the time with his grandchildren that he was so hopeful of. And, the horrible reality is that he probably won't be around to do it next summer, or if he is, he'll be terribly ill.

I know that's not the be all and end all, but it does seem like extra sand thrown in his face. The radiotherapy won't get rid of the tumour, but will hopefully stop it growing and will help with the pain. Mum says he is frequently grey with pain and can hardly manage the stairs any more. She wants to move his bedroom downstairs at home, but he won't hear of it yet. I think he doesn't want to admit that that time has now come. I think they'll wait til after the radiotherapy, unless the pain really does get too much. Sadly, they can't operate on the tumour if the radiotherapy doesn't work, as it's too near his vital organs. And he is now too weak to have chemo again. It would kill him.

He's off to the hospice on Friday to talk about pain management and get some massive painkillers. All rather horrific and depressing. I think we've had a lovely reprieve and now the real business of cancer is setting in. It's going to be a taxing time for a while. Mum said Dad was in floods last night, just with the pain and from having to tell us the bad news. Although he did want to do it himself. Must be so very very hard for them both.

Anyway, must go and play with my little bears, who are a welcome relief from my weeping and gnashing of teeth!

x

KIwI that is odd, ours were both up at 4.40 this morning too! I think we have non-sleeping twins! B was also up every hour in the night (that'll teach me to mention that B once slept through last week, ZJ) though I think it's teeth.
Out only way of getting through the day when T is up so early is to drive somewhere around lunchtime and give him half an hour's nap. Any longer and he's bouncing off the walls at 9pm, but it's enough to stop total meltdown by 5pm.
I have also realised that I forgive B his hideous nights "because he's still just a baby". But he's 19 months old. Oh dear. BEans, how are your nights going on the new regime?

Hello, JJ! grin.
Have a lovely break, Lady.
Vag , random question, did you like living in Derby? I ask because I saw on Location x3 the other day that a woman bought a house there for a very reasonable price. (And of course I want to bore you all with my ever-changing moving plans grin).

x-posts with BEans. So sorry to hear about your dad. It must be heartbreaking to be so aware of dying, for all of you sad. I hope he has good care from the hospice. He sounds like a very brave man (and your mum too). Lots of hugs from here. xxxx

Oh, and on the Gro clock thing - we have one for T but he just ignore it. Comes charging into our room telling us it's clearly daytime as it's so light, and there's something wrong with his clock as it seems to say it's nighttime. T one honest though, as B is up around 5 anyway, it's a bit pointless as I'd rather have them both awake at the same time, rather than having to keep one quiet for fear of not waking the other, IYSWIM. I'm sure they're more effective if you have deep sleeping other children and/or your child is not as determined as mine to prove you wrong.

Beans36 Wed 25-Jul-12 10:24:51

Spot - I can't even talk about nights with DD2. Suffice to say I have passed over responsibility for night waking to DH as he has simply been unable/unwilling to unite with me to try to beat the night waking and I am so furious with him that I told him last night that from now on he can deal with it. I don't know if he thought I was being serious or not. But I so was. He just gets straight up and goes to her with no heeding my advice from expert, which I passed onto him in detail. I'm done.

JamInMyWellies Wed 25-Jul-12 11:00:58

Beans sending you much love and strength. xx

urbanewarrior Wed 25-Jul-12 12:45:02

Beans I'm so sorry to hear your news. Hope he manages to get a bit more relief for the pain. And that you can find some peace and comfort. Much love. FWIW I think your plan with your DH is thoroughly sensible.

We've just got back from a weekend in the Alps. Friend's wedding which was really lovely - DD1 was a bridesmaid and super-cute. Am supposed to be working though so will try and catch up later.

Nolda Wed 25-Jul-12 13:04:31

So sorry to hear about your Dad, Beans. Hope you're playing in the sunshine with your lovely girls.

Rubena Wed 25-Jul-12 15:19:54

So sorry about your Dads news Beans he sounds like a lovely man, it just isn't fair.

Rubena Wed 25-Jul-12 15:22:20

DS has this clock it worked well at first then the novelty wore off and he ignores it now, but still a good time teaching aide hmm

Nolda Wed 25-Jul-12 17:56:55

We bought a sleepy rabbit trainer clock for DD when she was younger. However, she got very upset and it was mysteriously broken. She was outraged by the idea that we were not dying to see her 24 hours a day!

ZuleikaJambiere Wed 25-Jul-12 19:57:18

Gosh, I'm sorry to hear the bad news about your Dad Beans, I wish my arms were long enough to reach out and hug you from here xx

ZuleikaJambiere Wed 25-Jul-12 20:02:56

kiwi how do porridge fingers work? I assume you need to do more than just make porridge and shape it? Does it need baking, or just making really thick?

I meant to say about your book spot, although I'm probably not your target and so might be no help, I always enjoy reading your blog and it often makes me think about how to get through bad days. So if you need a different reader, I'd be a willing candidate

McKayz Wed 25-Jul-12 20:09:14

Oh Beans. I'm so sorry to hear the news about your Dad. Sending you much love x

JumpJockey Wed 25-Jul-12 21:05:25

Oh lovely Beans, I'm so sorry about your darling dad. Will keep you all in my prayers and hope he can get some comfort to enjoy his time with you and the girls.
Sleep - we have a gro clock for S, sometimes it works and it did for a while to begin with, now it's just the daylight that makes her think its up time. We have tried to crackdenify their room, but there's a window on the landing that means if she gets up for a wee, she thinks it's daytime.
Dh has just written to his senior partner saying he's no longer happy/ willing to refer women for terminations. We're both catholic, him cradle and me from later in life. This is really hard, I'm a strong believer in a woman's right to determine what happens to her own body but equally believe that life begins at conception rather than birth (horrible hypocrite as I've had the MAP more than once). This is also starting to raise conplications in our discussions about where we send S for school - local diocesan policy on sex ed is that children should be taught that sex outside marriage is wrong, and contraception is sinful, and only people approved by the diocese should be allowed to teach this subject. I really don't want my daughters being taught these things. It's going to make for an interesting 6 months as we decide where to apply for her!

JollyBear Wed 25-Jul-12 23:50:29

So sorry to hear that beans. Lots of love to you. Hospices are lovely, caring places. They can offer lots of help and support for your mum as well as your dad.

Zj mini shredded wheat, pancakes with blueberries, eggy bread... erm will think of more tomorrow!

Just finished packing for camp bestival. Dh wants to set off at 4am. Bonkers!

sybilfaulty Thu 26-Jul-12 06:54:21

Hello everyone . Sorry for no post but laptop broken so on iPad which I find very hard to touch type on. Have had a quick read so forgive me for no personals.

Lovely beans, I am so sorry the news is not good for your dad. Am thinking of you all and sending love.

Right, will try to pop on later.

Love o you all.

VagolaJahooli Thu 26-Jul-12 09:32:18

So sorry to hear about your dad Beans, he must be in so much pain, poor man. Please come here as often as you need to talk about what you are going through. Also sorry your DH isn't on board with the sleep thing. With all you are going through this is something you need to sort out with as least stress as possible.

Spot I really liked Derby. If you do decide to move to the area I would recommend renting for a few months then working out where you would want to live. There are lots of lovely little villages around which are very friendly, or if you do want to be in town there are big variations between areas, but in general most are still quite nice.

Sorry gotta go will add more later though before I go will ad to Nolda I've got that push up app too I love it

KiwiPanda Thu 26-Jul-12 15:07:56

Oh Beans I'm so sorry too. It must be so so hard. As others have said hospices are pretty amazing places, I hope you all get a lot of support. Lots of virtual hugs.

ZJ - porridge fingers - do you have a microwave? If so the BLW cookbook recipe (and I'm pasting this from an old email as I don't actually have that book but someone sent it to me): 3 tablespoons oats, 3 tablespoons milk, pat into the bottom of a flat dish & 3 mins in the microwave. I've only just bought my first ever microwave so haven't actually tried it, I used to do it in oven. I also add raisins as my DDs love them, and I either use water or oat milk as DD1 doesn't have cows milk and DD2 is still Boobmonster. Also, JBs pancake suggestion is a briliant one - I'd forgotten all about that but DD1 used to LOVE pancakes made from a bit of flour, a bit of egg and a piece of fruit all whizzed up in our superduper blender then fried in pan (so no sugar, just sweetness from the fruit). Sorry for rather vague measurements but as long as it's thickish it'll work..!

Obergene Thu 26-Jul-12 18:50:29

Hey from California,

Just catching up on the hotel WiFi because the girls begged to have a quiet morning playing under their bed while DH exchanges our hire car whose indicator broke mid six lane highway (that was FUN).

Beans, so sorry to hear about your dad. There are no words really. I remember this stage well. In my Mums case the hospice managed to give her great pain meds and really enhanced her quality of life. Does your Dad definitely want the radiotherapy rather than a last summer in Wales?

JJ - your DH's decision sounds momentus. And the catholic schooling choices sound hard. TBH I am an athiest so your dilemmas are far from anything i can imagine grappling with. I have been thinking a lot about religion this week as the wedding we came over for was super religious although very different A's the couple are Quakers (missionaries no less). The wedding was 48 hours of intense spirituality and I did actually try and believe because it all seemed so comforting (and magical in a gorgeous retreat centre in the Californian giant redwood firests)but I just could not feel it. DH did. He has always believed but not practised but he reckons that the wedding weekend made him want to explore Quakerism. It could be interesting if he goes down an active worship route when I am so sceptical.

Rubes, your company did you proud on our flight over. I forgot to order DD2 gluten free but they magiced up special meals for her and were so kind. TVs broke down mid flight though. It was a tense 90 mins (the plane was FULL of kids) before they got them working again.

Right better go. We are off to the beach. We have had are ups and downs so far, DD2 threw up for first 48 hours incl throwing up inches from the brides' White dress while being a flower girl! Biggest highlight so far was whale watching and seeing an actual Blue Whale plus 17 humpbacks!

Sorry to all the non sleepers.

VagolaJahooli Thu 26-Jul-12 21:41:38

Right back again. Anyway short answer Spot is yes it's nice in derby, however, you are about the furthest you can ever get from a coast. So if you enjoy being able to get to the seaside, not a great location. Anyway, if you are seriously thinking about it let me know I can get the lowdown on places to live for the 'good schools' from friends who still live there. Unfortunately, our tennant has just signed on for another 2 years so can't offer you cheap rent to try it out.

Wow Obes blue whales, amazing. I had a friend who was a Quaker, seems a nice religion.

JJ that is quite tough, in my code of conduct I don't have to carry out any treatment or care which I do nit agree with, or cannot condone, whether due ro religion or just personal belief. However, obviously referring is something very different. There are certain treatments I am not completely comfortable with, but I take the view that if it offered by the health service I am working for I will carry out the care. Also a little different in kids nursing as parents themselves are the ones making difficult consent decisions and probably dealing with a lot of guilt and emotion so it's not for me to add judgement to that. However, I respect your DHs decision and imagine it was a hard one to make. On the school thing, we inadvertently sent the boys to a Christian Montessori school here, we thought it was named after someone called Christian when we first found it and ds1 was accepted. But it seems to be more about teaching kids to live well and to be generous, kind, honest etc rather than teaching any moral rules. Also it is completely free as apposed to state schools which you pay a small fee dependant on your income. Also they are pretty hot on sex education here and i think the state doesn't allow them to not teach about sex and sexual health.

Have had a lovely few days of amazing weather and lots of beach time. By way of making up for the crappy weather, the North sea has decided to mimic it's mediterranian cousin and warmed up to a pleasant temperature. I had a lovely long ocean swim without a wetsuit on Tuesday afternoon and then DH bought the boys over and we met some friends for dinner on the beach. The boys were still swimming at 9 pm! We had such a nice time we did the same tning last night. Even managed a bit of bodysurfing as the waves were small but decent. I'm hoping that when we get back from London we will be able to get out for a surf if the weather stays as it is. Had a small wobble yesterday morning as had met some friends at a beach cafe further up than our local one, the beach was really busy as it is close to a more populated area and lots of people go there. Anyway I lost sight of ds2 for what seems like 10 minutes but was more like 2 minutes. We were all out looking for him. I was getting ready to contact the beach rescue people when a lady came wandering over with him. She had found him at the too of the beach he had wandered a little too far away and couldnt see our spot. I cyddled him so tight, he was so upset. He has a real fear of getting lost and often says he has nightmares about being lost. Poor little poppet. We knuffled extra tight.

We are catching the boat tomorrow night, getting very excited about coming over. Is anyone up for Wednesday arvo, somewhere near where Beans said (where did you say Beans?) Or should we all trunfle down to Brighton. I don't have a car but could catch the train down and meet in the center somewhere?

KiwiPanda Fri 27-Jul-12 08:56:07

Just posting from iPhone so quick one but Vag i am totally up for weds pm but wouldn't have time to go down to Brighton (DD1 at nursery so need to be back to pick her up).

VagolaJahooli Fri 27-Jul-12 09:10:01

Ah of course pick ups etc. Sorry Cat I tried. We have all trawled down to the beach for breakfast, DH with his laptop working, we want to enjoy the sunshine, just in case it isn't here when we get back.

traceface Fri 27-Jul-12 23:06:21

hi.
Beans I'm sorry to hear the bad news about your dad. I've never gone through what your family is going through but I will be praying for you all.
JJ I think your dh has been brave in writing that letter and following his conscience. Re the school thing, is the diocese policy not in line with your catholic beliefs?
I have come up against simliar issues at work, in fact I see teenage girls most weeks who have had unprotected sex and I give them the MAP. I believe that sex was designed for within marriage (yes I waited!) and am uncomfortable with the idea of a termination. However the MAP that I give works by thickening the mucous etc and by making the lining of the uterus really rubbish, so that fertilisation and the bit where it embeds in the uterus can't occur, so I feel a bit happier that it prevents it becoming a life, rather than ending a life. Having said that, even if it ended a life I think I would give it because most of these girls that I see are 14 years old, with low self esteem, who got drunk and made stupid decisions. They are not ready to be mothers. But it's so hard. And just to be clear, I would never judge or think badly of anyone who had chosen to have a termination.
Also I have to do sex ed lessons in a catholic high school and according to their policy I'm not allowed to mention contraception. I can talk about the use of a condom to prevent STIs but not to prevent pregnancy. But I'm not allowed to show them a condom (not even in a packet!). The other schools I go to have a full lesson on contraception and a condom demonstration. It seems a bit crazy to me because the kids are not all at a catholic school because they are catholic - it's often the parents' choice - and they are still teenagers, going out and getting themselves in risky situations, so I think they should get the same education as all the other schools. We don't promote sex but we just give the message that delaying sex is the best option, but if they do have sex, we want them to do it safely.
obe that's interesting about the Quaker wedding. I don't know much about Quakers. Is there lots of quiet contemplation? Or am I mixing it up with something? My cousin had a Pagan wedding a few years ago. It was proper full on pagan stuff with chants and cloaks and hand fasting and all sorts. I actually felt quite uncomfortable but my cousin came to my (christian) wedding so I couldn't really not go to his!
Well I just got back yesterday from the church kids camp - we had a fab time, despite the fact that it rained almost constantly! It was exhausting but such fun (said in Miranda's mum's voice smile I'm just trying to catch up with washing now, but also pack boxes for the move, and not pack anything which I need to pack for our hols to Cornwall next weekend! My house is full of boxes and clutter and piles of clothes!
Sorry I've waffled on rather.
Just watching the opening ceremony. I thought it was pretty impressive actually - all the industrial revolution stuff especially. Was a bit underwhelmed by Emile Sande though.
SOrry I'm waffling again.
Right I think I'll go to bed. We're only up to Ireland in the athletes....
Night night - I'll try to be less waffly and self centred when I come back xxx

JumpJockey Sat 28-Jul-12 21:45:33

Trace - my belief and dh's is that stopping conception is ok, so barrier methods alright. Things like coil which stop implantation of a fertilised egg, not so happy. We had a big talk about this and when it eventually comes to telling the girls, we wold generally go with the line that if you're going to have sex, make sure a) you are doing it because you want to, not from any pressure b) you're in a relationship where you care about your partner and they care about you, and c) if you're not in a place in your life where you want to have a baby, make sure that pregnancy can't happen. I don't belive that just straight abstinence education is the right thing (fully respect people who were able to wait until married, if you made that choice and were able to stick to it then that's pretty amazing given the pressures of modern society)

I know the catholic line is that sex should only be done with openness to procreation - but that means that older people, or those with fertility issues, are effectively being told they shouldn't, which seems very wrong. We feel that sex is about strengthening a relationship and is a gift from God (otherwise why would it be so much fun?!) and that if DH has the snip, as is the plan, we'd still be celebrating the amazingness of the human body by getting it on. ahem.

Meanwhile when S says to me halfway through mass "yes but how does the baby get into the mummy's tummy?" I'm very glad to be able to say "this is a quiet bit, I'll tell you later" and then she forgets... smile

I'm such a rubbish wife though, we were sat outisde having dinner and then watching the girls playing, looking adoringly on as E tried to push S on a swing. I lean over towards Dh, he says "if you want to kiss me in front of the girls, i wouldn't object..." and I had to say "sorry, i was looking at the aphids on the rose bush" blush blush

Kiwi hope you and dh are having lots of olympic fun!

Beans keeping you and lovely dad in my prayers and thoughts.

Obes how is california?!

JumpJockey Sat 28-Jul-12 21:48:45

Nb obes, just spotted what you said re dh and quakerism - how fascinating that the wedding affected him so much. Would you be happy with him investigating something like that?

Vag - your boys always seem to be so happy and secure, glad to hear you got ds2 back safely.

Indith Sun 29-Jul-12 18:36:15

Oh the joys of a carsick child. I was congratulating myself on having caught all the sick in a muslin when I discovered that dd had done a massive wee at some point in the proceedings. Carseat covers in the wash. At least I don't need to drive anywhere tomorrow.

Home from a brief tour of Leeds and Manchester, shall do some catching up tonight I hope amid washing and unpacking!

Indith Sun 29-Jul-12 19:13:46

Oh Beans I'm so sorry. Sending you love and many healing thoughts for all of you x

Enjoying the sunshine here on our return. Dcs are on the decking after a walk int he woods to collect sticks and dh is playing with the pizza oven.

Religion is a funny thing. For myself I firmly believe that religion as an organised thing is simply a way that people developed to explain the world in which they live, from Aboriginal dreamtime to Christianity, it is a collection of stories to explain the world and to reinforce the norms and expected behaviour of a society. However, that isn't to say I don't believe that there is something out there. I always say if I was Christian I'd be a Quaker as it feels similar to paganism is many ways. I went through the usual wicca/pagan phase as a teen and a lot of it has stuck with me, the cycle of the god and goddess over the year of course was in tune with seasons, it was a way of seeing the world, of keeping hope through the winter and rejoicing in the Spring but I like it, I don't necessarily believe in a god and a goddess but I like the balance it brings. I like giving thanks as the seasons turn and celebrating the solsices and equinoxes. I suppose I see the spirituality in nature and the way she looks after us so long as we respect her. I was brought up Christian but always found it too heavy handed and too male.

Of course ds1 is in a catholic school and the others will go there too grin. His school is pretty laid back though with a big community focus and I am happy to talk about other things at home. I think perhaps not being catholic helps with that. When the time comes I can say "catholics believe contraception is wrong but wev don't and this is why" it must be harder to contradict when it is your own religion. Personally I believe a woman must have choice, for me I don't think I could have an abortion but I have never been in that position so I cannot judge. Barrier methods are great, those that stop implantation do make me feel funny, I had a coil fitted once but it fell out after a couple of weeks. I was relieved really and didn't go back to have another one. Dh and I need a good chat about contraception, I think dh will have the snip as we both know we don't want another baby but since ds1 snuck his way though 2 forms of contraception........

Ds2 getting grumpy, I should go bath him! I need to try to get back into some semblance of routine, the poor baby is all over the place sleepwise without his school run naps! He has stopped putting himself to sleep too, stopped going to bed in the evening and keeps waking in the night and being WIDE awake. He is developing at such a rate though, keeps learning new tricks. Darn sleep regression!

McKayz Mon 30-Jul-12 07:41:27

We've had a rubbish night. DDs nose is all blocked up so she's not breathing very well unless sat upright. So we've been taking it in turns to sit with her.

The religion chat is interesting. I was brought up just general CofE and that's how the DCs will be brought up too. We don't go all the time but I make an effort to go once a month. It's actually DDs christening on Sunday.
DH was brought up catholic and was at a catholic school too. He's probably one of the least religious people I know. He doesn't agree with lots of it. His parents are no longer religious following a family tragedy which made them question whether God exists. But the same tragedy made his brother and sil more religious.

KiwiPanda Mon 30-Jul-12 16:14:23

Kayz have you tried saline drops? Worked wonders with mine particularly just before a feed

Vag is there a weds plan yet??

Indith Mon 30-Jul-12 16:36:10

A drop of olbas oil on your bra works wonders for feeding smile

McKayz Mon 30-Jul-12 18:04:19

We got some saline drops today. I think she might have colic too. Evenings can be really really unbearable as she just cries no matter what really. I feed her and she does feed but then she gets to the point where she is obviously not hungry but is still crying. We change her, cuddle etc but she still isn't happy.

I've decided to have a go at running. I was talking to my stepdad about it and he thinks I might be ok with my knees as long as I'm careful and stop straight away if they start to hurt. He's doing another marathon in September around Loch Ness. It looks like a lovely course.

Any recommendations for trainers? Or anywhere I could go to get advice about running shoes?

ZuleikaJambiere Mon 30-Jul-12 19:34:20

Thanks for the porridge fingers recipe Kiwi, I'll give that a go

envy at the whales Obes

Well survived on the camp Trace!

If DD is still bunged up Kayz, try feeding her in a steamy bathroom with the hot tap running, it seems to unblock my girls enough to feed decently. Colic sounds miserable for you all

We're hooked on the Olympics here - I loved the opening ceremony, and DD1 isn't complaining (much) about the lack of CBeebies, she's really enjoying the gymnastics. torch How is the solo parenting going Kiwi? And do you have tickets Vag, what are you seeing?

LadyThompson Mon 30-Jul-12 22:51:05

Evenin' all <bends knees>

I am back from Belgium and just doing my notes for my catch-up - too tired to start typing it now (so many interesting things to respond to!) but just wanted to say hello.

Brussels was v nice, though my cricketers lost the match. We didn't take the pushchair so DD2 was sightseeing on foot on Friday. She was a total champ.

I recorded the opening ceremony and watched it last night. I thought it was a bit weird in parts but jolly good, nonetheless. Interestingly, there were some Belgians at the match on Saturday who had just got back from the opening ceremony in London. They all loved it. They said they would have found it hard to understand the meaning of some of it without the printed programmes everyone had, but even if they hadn't had the programmes they still would have thought it was good.

I must go to bed but will be typing up my meanderings tomorrow.

VagolaJahooli Tue 31-Jul-12 10:45:20

Sorry for Radio silence heel busy and haven't had much time to get on. So is anyone up for a meet up somewhere around waterloo. We could do RFH as a meet up but if weather is nice could maybe sit out in the sunshine at a cafe along the river. What is the earliest anyone can do weds arvo?

Beans36 Tue 31-Jul-12 11:12:11

Hi all

Sorry for radio silence here too. Went to a wedding in Yorkshire at the weekend, which was fab. DH did a brill best man's speech and I did smashing make up, so all well. We got totally hosed without DDs and it was ace.

Afraid I can't do meet up tomorrow, sorry!

Also can't do a big catch up as am in Kent about to take Dad to a meeting with his oncologist and then his first new round of radiotherapy. Am a little taken aback by how much he's aged just in the last few weeks. Must not cry, must not cry!

Right, off I go before I weep uncontrollably and I mustn't do that!! He's busy in his study at the moment working on his will. God.

X

VagolaJahooli Tue 31-Jul-12 13:04:32

Oh Beans, I'm sat on the DLR trying not to cry. Wish I could see you to have a little hug.

LadyThompson Tue 31-Jul-12 17:05:12

Beans - try not to despair. The radiotherapy might patch up him nicely. And were you aware that some of the faster growing grades of cancer can be surprisingly responsive to treatment?

Vag - would love to see you tomorrow but I have a vomiting DD2 so I need to see how she is. Groan. She was sick in the car on the way home on Sunday but I thought that was just random - well, it appears that it wasn't random! Which is why I haven't been on yet to do my catch up.

Indith Tue 31-Jul-12 17:25:38

Beans sad brewthanks <-----flowers because you need them.

Ds2 has done nothing but fart, poo and vomit today. He always vomits lots but today has outdone himself! The poo is really really windy too so it escapes the nappy at high speeds. Doesn't seem unhappy though hmm.

McKayz Tue 31-Jul-12 17:32:58

Beans, thinking of you lovely. I hope it responds well to the treatment. xx

Indith, I hope DS2's innards calm down for you!

Proud boasting Mummy alert!! DS2 has just done his first poo on the toilet. I have been convinced he will be in nappies at 18 so I am so pleased that he seems to be getting somewhere in pants.

JamInMyWellies Tue 31-Jul-12 22:13:33

Beans be strong my love.

urbanewarrior Wed 01-Aug-12 08:07:52

Vag and kiwi I would love to see you at the RfH later. Vag am not sure whether urbane boy will be with me - am at work today but have slightly cunning plan to try to get him up here for the afternoon - should all be a lot easier now my horsey friends have finished trashing the local park. That or could definitely do cutty sark tomorrow am if that would be better for boys.

urbanewarrior Wed 01-Aug-12 08:11:43

Beans I managed to lose first part of post. Sorry to sound insensitive and be straight onto meet up. Second what Ladyt says. One of many cruelties of these things is that you just don't know how it will respond. Thinking of you and family.

VagolaJahooli Wed 01-Aug-12 08:29:17

DH has double booked us and I may be a little time limited today anyway. I can do tomorrow morning at Greenwich, as I'm down in Lewisham in the afternoon so very close. I think the boys would love the cutty sark.

KiwiPanda Wed 01-Aug-12 08:31:35

Vag can't do tomorrow am alas. I'm thinking of going to watch the time trial this afternoon though?!

ZuleikaJambiere Wed 01-Aug-12 09:22:45

How did your Dad's appointment go yesterday Beans? Much love and strength to your whole family x

Well done Kayz boy on the poo!

Kiwi the porridge sticks are hit (with both girls hmm), thank you for the recipe. Can I make a batch for several days worth of breakfasts?

Happy Yorkshire Day to you all

KiwiPanda Wed 01-Aug-12 09:33:15

Beans I'm sorry, I meant to add my thoughts to everyone elses messages - really thinking of you at this horrible, difficult time for you. Sending you vibes of strength and big hugs

ZJ Glad they were a hit! Yes I would definitely make up a batch in advance and keep them for a few days. DH claims porridge is better after a few days anyway, it "matures" apparently wink. You also asked very nicely how single parenting is going - not much fun! DD2 is teething so it terribly clingy. DD1 is fine when she sleeps ok but has been getting up ridiculously early (5.30am like her sister..) and is then really really grumpy in the afternoon. The weekend was a bit of an ordeal. She's at nursery now so it's a bit more relaxed but mainly it's just SO boring, I am a bit lonely and miss my DH! He was home at a vaguely resepctable hour last night so at least we got to chat but was off again at 6am this morning..

Nolda Wed 01-Aug-12 10:06:50

Lots of love and strength for you, Beans, from me too. I hope your dad's appointment went OK.

Nolda Wed 01-Aug-12 10:07:54

Well done to your DS, Kayz!

VagolaJahooli Wed 01-Aug-12 10:57:03

Go to the time trial Kiwi, would love to come with you. What are you up to Friday? Should we have a mini meet up near you? Urbs I can still do tomorrow morning at Greenwich park will have another 6 year old with me so lots of boy fun. What time is good for you? Can anyone else come to Greenwich? In hindsight the Olympics was not a good time to be trying to catch up with people.

VagolaJahooli Wed 01-Aug-12 11:00:02

Oh & Hooray on the poo and good thinking leaving it until after DD born & DH home, if I'd had known how difficult it was going to be, TTing DS1 I'd have been quite happy to leave him in nappies until his 18th birthday!

Nolda Wed 01-Aug-12 12:29:49

Hope you get some meet ups sorted out Vag. The Olympics is a great time to be in London though, great atmosphere. DH and I went to watch the judo yesterday and we enjoyed it v much. We're now looking forward to the sailing tomorrow and we'll be taking DD with us.

KiwiPanda Wed 01-Aug-12 12:44:00

Vag mini meet up sounds great! I'm in SW London though, how's that for you to get to?

urbanewarrior Wed 01-Aug-12 12:57:59

Yay vag - would love to do tomorrow - is cutty sark at 10 any good? We have afternoon plans but would love a good chunk of time for boys to run about. Went for first time since it reopened yesterday and ds and dd loved it - had to drag them away on promise we'd be back. Will pm you my mobile

And am on Olympic park on Friday and sat if anyone else is. Kiwi am sorry to be missing you this avo and envyenvyenvyenvy of time trial.

VagolaJahooli Wed 01-Aug-12 13:42:51

Perfect Urbs I'll see you at 10 @ CS. Will look out for your email. Do you have OP tickets? Kiwi I know you've told me before but where in SW are you. I'm in St Katherine Docks so easy to northern line.

I'm at stratford westfields, your right Nolda the vibe around London is fantastic, we went to the Swiss house & the danes have set up on the docks so lots of fun. There are loads of athletes & Olympic types wandering around westfields so it's fabulous. Also just noticed P.O.P having a sale so yipee!

KiwiPanda Wed 01-Aug-12 14:24:05

Vag just FB-ed you xx

Wel jel of all this meet up chat. Have a lovely time though, and enjoy the various Olympic events you're going to.

BEans, you are being so strong, lots of love to you and your lovely dad.

I received a birth announcement via text yesterday morning (before some arsehole stole my phone), girl called X, weight, bit of info about how birth went, etc. I assumed it was from my friend Helen but that she'd changed her phone number as it didn't come up as her. Replied with general congratulations message. Anyway, saw on Fbook later an announcement from her DH about the birth of a boy, called Y, different weight, etc. So two people know have given birth on the same day, both texted me, but I only knew one was pregnant and now have no idea who texted me first. Can't now respond with "er, who is this?".

Kayz that is top news on DS2's poo. T will only poo on teh loo if he's desperate, he usually waits until bedtime and then fills two or three nappies. So you're not alone!

Off to New Forest camping this weekend with some girlfriends. SO excited, esp as it means I may get some sleep. I think mine and Kiwi's DCs are in league with each other. B is up all night, then both up for the day at 5. WHEN WILL THIS END? Am amazed you have the energy you do, Kiwi. Maybe it's the running.

Talking of which, I went to a physio yesterday about my dodgy pelvic floor. She said I had a "deficient vagina" and gave me 3 out of 5. I nearly punched her. Cow.

Indith Wed 01-Aug-12 16:02:12

grin spot hopefully someone will post on FB soon! Maybe it is just a random you met at a toddler group once.

I am quite envy at olympics too really, I know the dcs would enjoy the atmosphere and stuff that you can just turn up to watch. bit far from here though!

JollyBear Wed 01-Aug-12 19:44:12

Hello all,

I'm struggling to keep up at the mo.

Spot Can you check fb for birth announcement or mention of baby? Or reply with request for her postal address and hope it rings a bell.

Beans Am thinking about you and your dad. Lots of love to you and your family.

JJ It is a tricky one re Catholic not teaching contraception in schools. It don't see how not mentioning it helps anyone.

Lots to report from our weekend but will have to wait till I'm on the laptop. Gee it is hot in the south! It was baking. Thinking of lighting a fire tonight up here in the frozen north.

LadyThompson Wed 01-Aug-12 23:13:42

Evening ladies! So sorry to miss you, Vag, but DD2 had over 24hrs of vomming (we have really been punished with these things over past few months) so I have cleaned up a lot of sick. I was hoping to grab a meeting with you on Fri but now I have to go to my Mum's as my storage stuff is being moved as the removal company had a cancellation and it's cheaper for me to take it. It is just coincidence that it's moving near her - it was the cheapest I could find, anywhere! I have to return on Saturday as I am showing estate agents round DP's flat on but am back off to Mum's again early next week.

Anyway, that's all boring. Are you having a lovely trip? Did you whoop with joy in Waitrose? Am so disappointed to miss a little meet up. sad It's been too long!

Spot, "a deficient vagina"? What a cheek! What a hideous remark! I meant to say to you - going back a bit, do you want me to read your book? I know precious little about PND so maybe I wouldn't be a good person to read it but if you want a good general opinion from a former literary professional...grin So, come on, where are you moving to? And how is your DP coping at home? And how are you coping with him at home?

I say, KP, those porridge fingers sound nice (also easy to make for a cooking numbskull like me). I think they'd make good snacks for the girls. Did you ever get to the bottom of the business about your choc-scoffing neighbours?

Aaaah, Paris. It is crap for veggies though. However, before I met DP, I got taken there by a friend who was trying to convince me to become his girlfriend. He located two veggie, or predominantly veggie, restaurants - in Paris! Can't remember a lot about them, except one was hideously smoky. I love France but the worst meal I ever had was in Biarritz. A plate of iceberg lettuce and some bread and butter, served with a grimace. That was the veggie option, in its entirety!

Rubes, are your eyes all better? Holiday plans firmed up? I am around on Mon 13th still.

Kayz, I am pleased your DS2 managed to perform! Bless him. How long is your DH around for now?

Nolda, I meant to say - very lovely to hear things are better with your DH now. Hurrah for that. I guess all relationships ebb and flow. I must say it worries me sometimes, how (comparatively) detached I feel about DP.Maybe it's healthy. And I don't feel at all keen to get married. I think he would be devastated if he knew I felt like that. That all probably sounds worse than I mean it to.

JJ - how have your DH's partners reacted to his letter? Abortion is such a thorny topic. I would struggle to have one myself I must admit, find the whole notion pretty unpalatable and worrying if I am honest but hate to judge others who might find themselves in a really awful situation. And sad as I personally find terminations, I am glad they are available in a medically safe environment as the thought of people doing it themselves or going to an unlicensed person as in days of yore...DP is involved in a case which I obviously can't give (m)any details of but I will say that it involves a person with no qualifications to do so, performing this operation...Quite horrendous. Anyway, so what do you think you will do re: schools? Send S to the Catholic one but take them on about their sex education policies?

ZJ - I am glad to hear your sister's wedding went beautifully. I loved the smiley picture of little A you posted on FB the other week. Adorable.

I lost my notes for my big catch up so I have done this 'blind' and probably missed people. How are things, Beans?

I think I have cocked up for my August trip. All flights now seem really dear. I might have to do two in Sept instead, as Ryanair have got a sale on but only for Sep dates. I have to be extremely budget conscious and aim to spend no more than about £40 return on the flights for these little jollies.

Must try to go to bed.

VagolaJahooli Thu 02-Aug-12 00:06:34

Lady, the Hague is lovely this time of year.

Urbs will msg you back soon.

Had a lovely night out with two dear beloved and old friends. We all met when I first arrived here in London all those years ago in 1998. We went to the Skylounge at 'Doubletree by Hilton' (I find the naming of motels in this way quite bizzare), it had the most amazing view of Tower Bridge and the city. I can highly recommend for a nice place to meet up next time there is a London night out

DH is sorting out flights & visas

VagolaJahooli Thu 02-Aug-12 00:15:03

Oops accidental post, Anyhoo he is sorting stuff for Saudi, still sad he isn't coming to the Olympic football game with us, but if he wins this bid it will be very good. I might even get a pony, just joking, I keep saying to him, if he wins the bid can I get a pony.

Had a mental day at stratford westfields today, but managed to shop and see some friends & Mark Foster (yummers) & Robbie Savage (niet zo yummers). I also managed to completely embarrass myself by asking a very tall young man in an Australian Opals (the name of the Aussie basketball team) shirt if he was an Olympic basketballer...turns out he wasn't, and DH & our friends found it hysterically funny. So did the tall young man's friends.

Right I'm rambling now, so I'm orf to bed, I have family Urbane to meet in the mané

sybilfaulty Thu 02-Aug-12 08:18:12

Sorry to have been rubbish keeping up. It's a fight for the iPad most of the time as laptop broken and everyone wants it. Alas no one apart from mummy allowed to use until 6pm, and then only ten mins each. M likes angry birds, t looks at hair care tutorials on YouTube and L looks up dogs on battersea website and suggests ones which would be suitable. Story of our house, except I am usually the angry bird.

Hope the meet up goes well. Loving the Olympics on tv. Mark Foster is gorgeous, but sadly not a ladies' man. Am developing a girl crush on Clare Balding as she is so enthusiastic and knowledgeable . Ah me.

Spot, how very rude. Am sure your fanny is most proficient. Did she have any suggestions to improve it, the rude bitch?

Right, swimming beckons. We were in pool for 2 hours yesterday. It went very quickly for the girls but nit alas for me.

Thinking of you lovely Beans.

Love to all.

Beans36 Thu 02-Aug-12 08:21:54

Hi everyone. Sorry I've been so quiet - I've been reading and lurking, but haven't had a moment to catch up. DH working so very hard at the moment, he's rarely home before 10pm, but last night he was home at 7.30, which was lovely. He mowed the lawn and we had supper outside and it was smashing. Now look. Yuck weather. He's meant to be taking the littles camping at his parents' house tonight, but it's not going to happen, I suspect. A night off for me! Fingers crossed!

All these people going to see the Olympics. Am so jealous! AND I'm gutted not to be meeting up, Vag and Urbane! HAve a lovely time.

Onto Dad. I'm feeling rather a lot stronger having been to see his oncologist with him. It is, of course, terminal, but his lungs are completely in remission, which they all agree is very unusual with a Grade 4 Sarcoma, which Dad has. And the fact that he has a new tumour in his pelvis, rather than one of the 3 original ones re-activating is a good thing (weird though it sounds) as it means he can have more radiotherapy, as he couldn't have done if it had been in the same place as before. They are flummoxed by that as well. BUT it is a very aggressive tumour and is growing really fast and causing him an enormous amount of pain. He has managed to speak to the hospice and they are controlling it well. The radiotherapy will cause the tumour to inflame and swell before it (hopefully) shrinks, or at least stops growing, so his pain is going to get considerably worse before it loosens its hold on him.

If the radiotherapy works, he could have a few months without any further recurrences. So keeping our fingers crossed. If it doesn't work, he can't have any more chemo, but there is a new drug out there, which is a pill and although it hasn't been licenced over here yet, he can still get hold of it. It's not chemo, but is a variation thereof, and that, too, could give him a few more months. It's all about the months, isn't it???? Anyway, it was fairly positive and Dad and I had lunch together and giggled a lot and it was really rather wonderful.

On the subject of terminations etc, I had one back in my early twenties, and it was horrific, but the circumstances dictated that I should have one. It was a miserable time, but I admit, I was glad it was available to me. Now I have had children, I cannot imagine having an abortion, but at the time it was the right thing for me to do.

Spot - a "deficient vagina" - hilarious! You poor thing. Why is it deficient? Surely most women after a VB do a little wee on coughing, jumping or giggling helplessly. I mostly think I've finished a wee, wipe, and get a bit on my fingers, which is nasty!

And for those of you with early risers, I do feel for you horribly. I'm sure it'll pass, but until it does, it's horrific. I had it with these two for about 3 weeks when summer started when it started getting lighter in the mornings, but it has thankfully calmed down now. But Spot and Kiwi yours seems to go on year round. Just think, in 12 years we'll wish the buggers would get out of bed!!!

Right, onto breakfast. I am being lazy as hell today.

xxx

Beans36 Thu 02-Aug-12 08:23:08

PS Mark Foster is dating Colin Jackson, Sybs - that is my best bit of Olympic gossip - it's a long term thing. Did anyone know?

xx

VagolaJahooli Thu 02-Aug-12 09:19:35

Really! Oh thank goodness I didn't ask for a photo of him and then gently place my hand on his buttocks like I'd been hoping to do.

Spot, I was just thinking about your recent diagnoses, surely it is your pelvic floor that is deficient, your vagina has nothing to do with retention and expulsion of urine?!?

Sybs I'm coming have texted you and will prob ring just as I'm leaving, but as long as I can get this lot moving should be there between 10 & 10.30.

Beans I can't help thinking it is bloody unfair that your dad has beaten all those cancers but is being blighted with this tumour. I'm glad you had a lovely lunch, and that he had you with him for the appointment.

JollyBear Thu 02-Aug-12 11:15:47

Ooh beans, my Dh told me that gossip. I didn't believe him. Both gorgeous men! The appointment sounded quite positive especially the lungs being in remission.

LadyT My two have had 3 sickness bugs in the past month. I had to have a shower at 2am yesterday as J was sick in my hair sob

Vag (how apt, I'm talking to my own nethers). She said my pelvic floor was ropey anyway, but having spent half an hour with her finger inside me, getting me to cough and squeeze (was far more embarrassing than any pregnancy related gynae stuff) I guess she's saying it's all a bit to cock down there. angry.

BEans yes I know everyone lets out a bit of wee, but when i had to run after the boys the other day I had to change my pants and trousers, so it's quite extreme. sad.

Glad things are looking up a bit for your dad, despite the long-term prognosis. I bet your dad felt very supported by you being there with him.

Lady, I would love you to read it if you've got the time, but I realise you have so much going on so no pressure. If you really are up for it I'll email it over.

Sybs swimming for 2 hours is full on. You're a better woman than me. And the rude bitch has given me a sheet with a series of exercises on it. And a "goal" to reach before my next appt in 4 weeks. She's also made comments on my bowel movements. Such a liberty!

Sorry for all those with vomity children. It's just the worst kind of bug. At least when it's a virus there's no cleaning involved. Hope babies JB and Lady get better soon.

No baby news on FB re-the random text. Maybe it was a wrong number!

Am about to phone home insurance company now and, fingers crossed, they might pay for a new iphone handset. Had no idea they cost so much or I would have got specific phone insurance out.

KiwiPanda Thu 02-Aug-12 12:54:36

afternoon all! Just back from volleyball. It was fun although DD1 lost interest after about 10 minutes and spend the rest of the time going to the loo or faffing or fidgeting or climbing around and annoying everyone. DH on his one morning off from the Olympics very nicely took them both home so I could actually watch some of it. Exciting match. But seriously, that girl cannot sit still for 2 minutes. Is anyone else's DC like that? I would never dream of taking her to cinema, for exmaple, she just does not have the attention span for it.

Beans - Colin J was dating him (Foster) some time ago, but not anymore. Has another partner tho. CJ is very much still in the closet. I worked with him some time ago and he sort of opened up a bit, but it's all a bit sad as his parents are still waiting for him to meet the right young lady and settle down. They are quite traditional Jamaicans and can't imagine they would be very happy with it.

LadyT I put a note through their door but nothing.. chocolate thieves! I am sort of hoping that one day I get a parcel to take in for them, so that I can refuse to hand it over until they buy me some very posh chocolate. And I glare at their front door in a total passive aggressive way. I'm sure the front door is TERRIFIED.

KiwiPanda Thu 02-Aug-12 12:55:27

ps Spot My pelvic floor definitely isn't up to much either. It's fine running at a certain pace (easy) but when I start to push it it all goes to hell in a handcart. Did you get any advice/ exercises you can share?!?

Nolda Thu 02-Aug-12 13:13:25

Just a quick one from my phone. My email has a virus and if you get a message from me entitled Private Message, please do not open it. So sorry!

KiwiPanda Thu 02-Aug-12 13:15:59

Oh latest on my falling out with sister: having exchanged messages and agreed to talk in person, she sent me a 4 page letter (as she left for holiday). Totally typical of her, to decide she wants to have her say and sod what I think/want. It's 4 pages of me me me me me me. With Stalinist quality revision of history. Barely slept last night thinking about it. All a bit miserable.

Beans36 Thu 02-Aug-12 19:38:13

Oh Kiwi, horrid horrid. Are you going to write back, or just leave it? What did she say in her letter? Sometimes committing pen to paper can be a mistake as you can't take it back. BUT you write beautifully , so I'm sure you would be fantastically eloquent if you did write.

So sorry about grim sicknesses. All ok here. DH has taken girls camping, so am home alone for the night - in my own home. How weird?? I have emptied and put the bins out, hoovered, changed sheets and generally tidied. Am now drinking rather a lot of vino. Don't know why, the girls will be home by 7am, as DH needs to race to work!! He'll be knackered tomorrow, but the girls were gorgeously excited! They got into their trackie bums and jumpers after the bath so they could go and gather wood when they arrived. Pru is totally exhausted, although I tried to give her a snooze, but she wasn't having it. Could be interesting. But not my problem. Heaven!

Just saw canoeing silver and gold. Brilliant!

Gutted my gossip was so out of date. I thought I knew a secret! Any other goss about various love lives??

traceface Thu 02-Aug-12 21:56:20

hi ladies smile
Just a little hello from me because I need to get to my bed. We're off on holiday tomorrow - a week in Cornwall smile but we're spending tomorrow night in Portishead to break the journey. All packed I think - and the house is still full of boxes for the move.
I'm a little worried because my boobs are really sore and I'm exhausted. My period is not due for another week but I stupidly googled pregnany with copper coil and it seems the world and his wife have ended up preggas despite having a coil shock I think it's actually 99.something effective so it's very unlikely, but I'm slightly concerned all the same!
spot I feel your pain (or rather dampness) with the pelvic floor. I also ended up with change of pants and trousers last week after doing a few star jumps with dd1 blush. I saw a physio last year who used feaky tools up my vag to measure the muscle strength, and after 6 months of exercises she retested the strength to find that it was......slightly worse than when I started! Rubbish. I think your rude bitch would find my vagina rather deficient! BTW, I'm more than happy to look at your PND book. I doubt I'll be online at all until we're home from holiday but feel free to email/PM me and I'll pick it up once we're back.
We haven't seen deids for a while. Are you lurking?
Can I ask the runners a question? How do you run in hot weather? generally when I run my breathing is fine (which I assume means that my fitness level has increased) and my legs are fine, it tends to be energy levels or a stitch that stop me. I've worked out that my energy is much lower when I've not had much to eat, so can work round that. But when I run in the heat it just makes my head want to explode! I only managed 5k today because the sun was beating down on me. I did take a water bottle but it just didn't cool my beetroot head! - I'm hoping it won't be hot when it's the GNR, but if it is, how do I not get too hot?

traceface Thu 02-Aug-12 21:58:15

oh and beans I hope your girls have a fun night grin Enjoy your grown-up evening xxx

McKayz Thu 02-Aug-12 22:08:17

Oooh Trace my PILs live in Portishead. We're off there on Tuesday for a holiday. Hope you have a lovely time in Cornwall.

LadyThompson Thu 02-Aug-12 22:31:28

Have a lovely hol, Trace. I wouldn't worry too much, I get PMT type symptoms like that for about two weeks before my period so I think a week is deffo within the zone.

Beans, I don't think I know any more famous people's lovelives gossip but I will wrack my noddle. I am glad your Dad has got some more options left on the table in terms of treatment and it is wonderful that the original tumours are remaining static. I hope I didn't cause offence with my remarks about terminations. I've not had one myself but oddly, before I had kids I found the thought of them far less upsetting than I do now. I expect that is very common.

I've got my mind on babies again. Some friends had a baby this week and it was a forceps delivery after a long labour, and now the baby is in intensive care as the docs were concerned he was very drowsy, and they are running lots of tests. I am crossing everything that all is well...I haven't been able to think about much else today.

Another friend of mine had a traumatic birth last time (her DD is almost exactly the same age as my DD2) and now she is pregnant again. Anyway, she is going private this time and is using my lovely obstetrician! I am so pleased.

Kiwi, that is very annoying behaviour (again) from your sister: chucking a grenade like that then buggering off on holiday. I must say, I'd be v tempted to write back but I suppose if you do it might scupper an eventual meeting. Or maybe it would clear the air? It would certainly be cathartic. I hope you feel calmer about it, anyway, and get a little more sleep...

Do email it, Spot. I can probably read it at Mum's next week.

How is DD2, JB? D is ok now. I have got a blimmin' sore eye though. It's all bloodshot and a bit swollen to the side of one iris. Weird. Conjunctivitis? But no gunk whatsoever. DD2 pokes me in the eye fairly regularly hmm so it could be that. Specs for me for a few days....

Oh yikes, I am dashing off up to the Midlands tomorrow to meet the removal van which is taking my stuff to the new, very cheap, storage place. It's all quite logistically tricky and I feel quite stressed about it. I am not going to go to bed late - FOR ONCE.

VagolaJahooli Thu 02-Aug-12 22:46:01

Helooo, just popping on to say, thanks for a lovely morning & our free entry to Cutty Sark, familyUrbs. We continued on after you left and stayed for another couple of hours. The boys really enjoyed the upper deck. They played with some American boys in the Apprentices quarters. Luckily we popped down to the cafe for lunch just in time for the rain. Sorry vegboyunos friend was a bit possessive. He is very sweet but he gets a bit grumpy when he has to share DS1. DS1 loved seeing your DS, and DD1 is so sweet, she & DS2 were quite the sailors on that sailing game.

Spot, I have no words...her finger...up there...do they not have devices for this sort of thing???? I was doing kegels exercises whilst reading your post. However, keeping it in that area, I think I'm becoming a little less efficient, down there, but the weird thing is, it was fine after both births it has just been in the last year that it has, shall we say loosened. DH says it's fine from his, erm, perspective, but star jumps and skipping ropes can be a problem. Actually, and this is probably, a little TMI, my mooncup suddenly seems, well a little small. I remember when I bought it after DS1 was born, I bought the smaller of the two sizes and it was fine. However, now, I do have a teeny bit of leakage. Is it possible to loosen with age, or is it the exercise?

Oh gotta go tickets have been released.

VagolaJahooli Thu 02-Aug-12 23:46:52

I got tickets to the men's hockey tomorrow morning yay two matches an Aussie one and a dutch one!!!!

KiwiPanda Fri 03-Aug-12 07:23:28

Morning all. Will rack my brains for gossip later Beans but am currently down with horrendous bout of mastitis - why did this happen when I am totally solo parenting. Have temp of 102, excruciating pain and shivers. Awful. Thank GOD DD1 is at nursery today & my in laws are coming down to help w DD2 but weekend is going to be grim. DH working 6am - 11pm both days, in laws going away (my parents are on holiday)
Oh god

MomOrMum Fri 03-Aug-12 08:46:14

Hi everyone! Have been awful at keeping up but then remembered Veg is in town. Have I missed all the meet ups???

MomOrMum Fri 03-Aug-12 08:48:33

Just lost a post I think (hate posting from phone) but just a flying visit to see if I've missed all the Veggie-related meet ups?? Vag/Veg you still around this weekend?

Lots of love to all of you!

MomOrMum Fri 03-Aug-12 08:58:29

Oops didn't lose post so two rubbish messages in a row. blush

I've had a skim of just the most recent posts...

Spot, sorry to hear about your phone. It's made remember to sync mine with laptop! I don't have phone insurance as it is an ancient iPhone that barely works anymore so hardly worth it.

Kiwi - mastitis, you poor thing. I'm around this weekend on the other side of London if I can help in any way??

Sounds like loads of vom bugs around. Awful. It seems even worse when they're sick in summer for some reason!

Beans, amazing that your Dad is still up for a laugh over lunch even in the face of so much pain. He sounds like a real fighter.

Sybs, did you hear about the Stonehenge bouncy castle coming to Ruskin (I think?) park this weekend? Apparently true to size. Sounds quite cool!

Urbs, a colleague has just moved very near you I think. Are your older ones at a school with initials EW by chance? She is pregnant with %233 and her older ones are similar age to yours.

Think of you all often in spite of horrendous non-posting!

VagolaJahooli Sat 04-Aug-12 12:27:16

%233? Have checked my phone keyboard and the letters for those keys are 'gwee' not sure what that is?

Olympics was awesome. The park is amazing. Got tickets to the hockey Aussie v Argentina & dutch v kiwis so we took our green & gold & Oranje. DS1 loved it, but DS2 found it a bit boring.

Kiwi how are you? Mastitis is a Bugger, I had it again with DS2 at 10months which I was not expecting. Sorry I do yesterday as was as lympics, but you weren't well anyway.

Had a great time with Urbs though, I can highly recommend the Cutty Sark & am telling one who will listen to get a membership.

VagolaJahooli Sat 04-Aug-12 12:28:56

Oh & prayers, white light for DH he is currently halfway through a 3 hour presentation to the Saudis in Riyadh for this contract.

McKayz Sat 04-Aug-12 12:36:53

Fingers crossed for your DH Vag!

Lady, DH goes back to work on the 19th. He is in Singapore for a week on a course and then goes to Ivory Coast again for 8 weeks. He's only getting 6 weeks off this time. So he has about 3 weeks to cash in, so he's using it to make sure he's home at xmas and cashing some in so we can have a very good xmas.

KiwiPanda Sat 04-Aug-12 14:12:28

Hey all. Ladies, if you didn't think childbirth was painful enough for you and are seeking still more hideous pain, I can recommend having someone massage your boob for an hour to remove blockages. Un-sodding-believably painful. Seems to have worked a bit though as temp down today and feel a bit more normal though still not great.

Vag oddly I've had it with both girls, both at about 9 months. I wonder if it's to do with teething. Lactation consultant lady told me that sometimes when they teeth they can "bite" with gums and a tiny graze can become the source of infection.

Haven't left the house today as have managed to keep DD1 happy with CBeebies adn DVDs while keeping eye on the 'Limpics as she calls them.

MomOrMum Sat 04-Aug-12 21:48:31

Urg that strange code was supposed to be number (symbol) 3. Kiwi glad you're surviving.

I know I'm supposed to be watching the Olympics but instead I just watched The Descendants with George Clooney. [sob]

sybilfaulty Sun 05-Aug-12 09:49:52

How are you feeling, Kiwi? Better I hope.

Loving the Olympics but feeling very slothful today. Day of tidying and sorting with sport on beckons.

Have a restful Sunday

KiwiPanda Sun 05-Aug-12 13:45:53

Just about hanging in there. Utterly surreal weekend of child wrangling, fighting a fever interspersed with amazing sporting moments that I may or may not be hallucinating with my temperature

I have, however, forgotten what DH looks like

McKayz Sun 05-Aug-12 17:37:06

Kiwi, I hope you are starting to feel better now.

DD had her christening today. We've had loads and loads of fun. We have very lovely friends and family. Plus some very warm weather.

Now we need to pack for our holiday!

VagolaJahooli Sun 05-Aug-12 17:44:46

Oh poor Kiwi, if I hadn't been watching buff men playing hockey on Friday I couli have bought my boys over to entertain your girls.

Dh is back from Saudi and feels it all went quite well. Poor thing he is very tired but we managed to pop up to tower to watch the Marathon ladies so he got a bit of Olympic action. Our friends are Irish & kiwi so we had lots of runners to support between us. Going to have a BBQ dinner then head off to the boat. Sorry I didn't get to catch up with anyone but the lovely Urbs and her two. Maybe next time when less mayhem from Olympics.

VagolaJahooli Sun 05-Aug-12 17:46:45

Just looked at photos on FB your dress looks great, that colour really suits you.

sybilfaulty Sun 05-Aug-12 19:43:39

You all look lovely Kayz, and R is a poppet.

I love hearing tales of your days, Vag, you sound so fulfilled and so into everything. I love the way you seize the day, and am going to try to be more like you as you are so very positive. ONly had 2 glasses of wine but am feeling the lurve.

Kiwi, hope you are better and hope you will see DH soon. Mine is glued to Ipad / I hpone / tv in a quest to keep up with it all, and I am sick of it. I might have killed him if he'd been writing about it. Ah me, only another week - will his role be a bit less in Paralympics?

Still thinking of my lovely pal Beans.

Happy Sunday y'all.

McKayz Sun 05-Aug-12 21:25:25

Thank you smile

I'm sadly giving up heels though. I spent just 20 minutes in heels and was in agony. So wore my trainers with that lovely dress blush

Indith Mon 06-Aug-12 11:20:26

Getting this back on my list for a proper post later!

Shoe lady came round yesterday to do new school shoes for ds1 and dd has gone and grown out of her shoes too, thye are only 2 or 3 months old shock. I knew she had been growing but still. Ungrateful expensive wretch.

McKayz Mon 06-Aug-12 17:13:12

Indith and any other sling using mums, do you know of any websites that have different ways of wrapping a sling? DD hates having her head in but isn't strong enough to have it out yet. So just wanted to try something other than the ones that come in the instructions.

Indith Mon 06-Aug-12 17:30:36

Youtube is the best really. Try typing things like newborn front carry, kangaroo with newborn or something like that into the search. If you use a kangaroo rather than a cross carry you can bunch some fabric up at the top to provide head support.

Beans36 Mon 06-Aug-12 17:42:57

Hi everyone. Indith, not sharing your pain on shoe front - DD1's feet haven't grown for nearly a year... Starting to fret!!

Sorry am a bit intermittent at the moment, am finding school holidays fairly hard work, to be honest! I love the girls, but they are full on and I am struggling to entertain them! It's not terrible, but DD1 will play happily on her own, which is fab. DD2, however, is v demanding. I am KNACKERED! How I wish I was one of those smug wonderful mums who don't exist loves having their children around them all the time. I loved it when the weather was good. Rain, not so much! That'll teach me for posting smugly on FB about not finding the holidays too bad!!.

I have a pox question... One of my friends' little boy has chicken pox. Am keen to get it over with. Should I go round there?? Or is that just wanton idiocy??

Vag with Sybs - you are so positive, must emulate you. And your pics on FB are gorgeous. Man your sons are going to be lady killers!

Kayz - I was a Baby Bjorner, so no help on slings, sorry!

Kiwi, you poor love, how are your norms now? And where did you get your bath letters from? I want some!

Fantastic storm here. Am going to peel DD1 away from telly to watch it!

Big love xx

Beans36 Mon 06-Aug-12 17:44:11

PS for "norms", read "norks", Kiwi!!

Beans36 Mon 06-Aug-12 18:01:42

Do any husbands anywhere in the world rinse their body hair out of the bath after use??

Rubena Mon 06-Aug-12 19:17:54

Mine dows now beans but only after massive bit of a rant about it! Sorry to read about your Dad a while back.
Can't remember everything as had to skim but will read back properley later. Apols.
Baby bjorner here too Kayz sorry.
Vag! Didn't Know you were meeting up another day! Could have made it- Bugger.
Lady I'm much better thanks ) days of the drops again and was ok. How are you though? Still haven't decided what we will do for time off!
Am trying to swap work days so might be away the 13th and after that will be out for the month. Will let you know though if it turns out I'm around r

Indith Mon 06-Aug-12 19:23:51

No but then the entire of our house is covered in my hair doing th post natal fall out thing.

Rubena Mon 06-Aug-12 19:27:15

Urgh sorry many typos and hasty phone post cut off
Ps kiwi you are addicted to twitter - making up 95% of my tweets! How do you spend that much time there! How's the running? Think I'm officially giving it in for swimming or something low impact since another friend has had big knee problems and practically immobile now shock
Must go and speak to dh. Ds sent home from nursery with high temp and has just taken himself to bed sad not ideal as he's off to nursery for the morn and dh already pulled from work early to get them sad

Sorry to hear about the mastitis, Kiwi, how is it now? It's so funny how the different media platform influences the topic of conversation. (Twitter: journalism. Olympics. Facebook: Photos. MN: Tits)

Back from my weekend camping last night with a mega hangover. Had a really lovely time (and made even better because one of my friends works for a mag about hotels and got us an afternoon at a local spa free!). Not quite as much sleep as I might have liked (thanks to wild ponies trying to enter tent in the middle of night) but still just lovely to have some time away and hang out with my mates. T was at my mum's and had a whale of a time. B didn't appear to miss me at all. Apparently the one time DP thought he said "mummy", he actually said, "dummy". hmm.

Beans, you've broken the back of the holidays, keep it up! Why not come to sunny Brighton (or near enough) one day if you're short of things to do? Seriously.

Poor DS, Rubes, hope it's just an overnight thing. sad. am well envy of your FBook pix.

Indith Mon 06-Aug-12 19:50:56

Soooo

Spot I am going to read and feedback I promise, just failing to find quiet time to concentrate! I feel you rpelvic floor pain too. Still hoping lots aond lots of exercises will help. I've been working on my posture too to generlaly counter the effects of pregnancy on posture which helps to draw the muscles in. In theory anyway! Not braved another run since hte one that made me feel like I was turning inside out.

MoM hello!

Kiwi your sister is odd. How is the boob? Hope that you survive the remainder of the olympics. Friend of mines fiance is working the olympics but she doesn't have kids to put up with while he is away!

Vag glad Saudi went well, all the best. Glad you've had a good holiday back here. Do let us know if you will be venturing to Hull, plenty of good easy to get to places for meeting up with small ones in tow.

Kayz glad Christening went well.

Beans thinking of ou and your dad, I hope things go ok with the new tumours and you all enjoy every moemnt you have together. Enjoy the non grwoing feet while the last. I shelled out £68 yesterday for school shoes and casual shoes for ds with his stupid wide feet that make buying supermarket cheapies impossible and she is coming back next week for me to hand over another £35 ish for dd as she has stupid shallow feet and she only had one pair the fitted her wll but they were pink so she's ordering more styles and coming back. Bloody love the shoe woman though, I;d be tearing my hair out if I had to go to and from shops trying to get the right fittings for them.

Beans I confess I took my dcs round to play with an infected child, mainly because I've never had it and we were going to ttc and I didn't want the risk of them getting it while I was pg. I think I was probably a bit irrational. I'm still not sure about it confused. There will always be the odd child who does get complications, but then how do you know they wouldn't have the same if they got it "naturally"? I don't know. Have you had it though? Would you run the risk of passing it on to your dad?

Beans36 Mon 06-Aug-12 20:20:58

Indith - that's my worry re pox and Dad, but am not due to see him til 20th August. But if one has delayed appearance, that would be a problem. I think I'll give it a miss! Thank you!
Sorry to only reply to that one post! Sausages, mash and peas calling...

X

Indith Mon 06-Aug-12 20:38:21

Up to 3 weeks incubation so ....

KiwiPanda Mon 06-Aug-12 20:48:06

Hello all. Thanks for inquiries after my boob wink - much better though DD2 behaving very oddly on that side so proving a little difficult to keep her feeding on it lots (my winces of agony when she does probably don't help). But now I have a horrible tight cough, one of those ones that hurts when you cough, and am losing my voice. And still have intermittent temperature. It's never bloody endless. So I haven't run since last Thursday and can't think when I will again SOB

Anyway yes I am indeed addicted to twitter Rubs! Given that I don't have much adult conversation at the moment it's about as close as I get... I do love it though. You need to follow more people so my tweets disappear ;)

Beans If your dad has had it, he should be fine shouldn't he, or does a very weakend immune system mean he could get it again? He certainly can't get shingles from it, as some people worry about.

Done my tenth solo bedtime in a row, but a rare treat - DH was doing cycling which finishes earlyish so is now home! At least I assume it's him. There's a man with keys to my house sitting on the sofa eating pasta and he looks like he feels at home, so I can only assume it's DH. I'll check his byline photo just to be sure

(Oh and haven't done anything about sister's letter yet. Except refuse to think about it until I feel better)

VagolaJahooli Mon 06-Aug-12 22:12:42

Do you think we love the Olympics so much because we get to sit on the couch watching Tele all day, with the excuse that we are being supportive of our girls & boy sports stars? Oh I did bawl when that man from the Dominican republic got his gold medal.

Sybs I mainly get out, cos if I stay in I will end up letting the kids watch Tele all day.
Sorry Rubs, I changed it because I thought it was easier for Lady, and hasn't had much feedback on the Tuesday, but actually it was quite difficult to find time this trip, esp with DH having to trip off to Saudi. Also, I should have maybe organised VIA FB as I had trouble getting into here often enough.

Indith we are thinking of coming over during DS1's half term break so will keep you posted. We may or may not have a car, but can do trains so will find a nice spot to meet up. When is Trace's GNR?

DH starts a new contract in Amsterdam tomorrow, my charmed life with DH working from home is over, but will be nice knowing what time he leaves & arrives home everyday, the boys will know when he is home, it's play time.

Kayz I agree with Indith look on youtube. I actually got good ideas for making slings from YouTube.

Sorry your feeling so crap kiwi, will you be getting a little treat in the form of a weekend away when he is finished? Can you get a sitter in or a friend to come over to watch the girls so you can have a long lie down. I should have stayed for 2 weeks, I could have come over to watch the girls & I could have visited Spot. It is amazing how fast a week gets used up. Was lovely seeing friends, though the LOs are a bit forlorn today as they miss the friends we were staying with already. I went past Customs house & remembered that brilliant evening last time I was over.

We had a nice trip home, we were a little late getting the train from Liverpool street so had to catch the 9pm train to Harwich. DS1 fell asleep in the taxi last night to LPS & didn't wake until we woke him as we pulled into Hoek Van Holland this morning at 7.45!

Right I'm rambling now, and can't remember what else I wanted to say. Tired.

VagolaJahooli Tue 07-Aug-12 23:00:03

Oh dear did I break the thread with my ramblings?

Beans36 Wed 08-Aug-12 08:33:59

Hello! Am still here. Just gone into hiding. Hope everyone ok?

sybilfaulty Wed 08-Aug-12 08:52:55

I'm OK thank you darling smile. Hope you are doing ok too. Thinking of you angel.

We are on a swimming marathon this week. It's every day for half an hour but the whole palaver takes nearly 2. I am channelling Paul McCartney with all the thumbs up and gurning at my nervous daughters as they reluctantly jump in or make a starfish. Ah me. Takes me back to the swimming pool at Stratford with a horrible instructor pushing my head under the water as my horrified mother looked on. That was 35 years ago and still a really clear memory. Argh.

Hope your back is better, my lovely Spot.

Have fun y'all.

Nolda Wed 08-Aug-12 13:35:15

Sybil, my two are doing swimming too this week. At least I don't have a third to get changed! Two is hard enough. Think I've lost weight in the form of sweat too! At our leisure centre the "best" swimming teacher is very scary and likes to throw pupils in and dunk them. The reception lady could not believe that I didn't want scary teacher for DD. "But everyone wants X", she said. "Well I don't thank, you" was my reply. I don't want DD to have to go through that kind of experience. As you point out, you still remember it vividly 35 years on!

Hope the rain clears up so we can get out to the park. Or we might have to do some baking. Mmm cake ....

McKayz Wed 08-Aug-12 15:48:49

I'm about sort of. I'm at PILs near Bristol. Having a holiday. Going to see the hot air balloons on Friday. The boys are very excited.

Indith Wed 08-Aug-12 17:00:34

As if my hair wasn't falling out enough already I was tearing it out this afternoon.

Ds2 has developed a bit of mild excema, easy enough to keep under control at the moemnt but I thought I'd pop into baby clinic and pick up a prescription rather than pay for more cream. An hour and a fucking half later we emerged. An hour and a half of boiling hot waiting room and ds1 and dd going mental. ThenI still needed to post a parcel of some experimental ebaying (Frugi dungarees that went for 99 bloody pence) except I forgot the parcel at home so that will have to be done tomorrow then over to another village to drop bags of clothes at the charity shop (because I can't be arsed to ebay for 99 bloody pence) but the bloody charity shop was closed even though the opening hours inthe window clearly stated it should be open then over the Lidl for the shopping then home again to a slightly panicked dh because he didn't know where I was and needed the car to go rowing which I knew perfectly well and was in time for but still got an "I didn't know where you were!". Humph. I never tell him when I'm going out because when he is working he is at work and I treat it as though he isn't there.

VagolaJahooli Wed 08-Aug-12 19:03:06

Gosh Indith I'm exhausted a slightly frustrated just reading that. Blimey your DH is going to get a shock when you start Uni and he has to make some allowances for your time.

Beans my lovely how are you?

Kayz balloons sound fun.

Sybs how was the pool today? What is it about swimming teachers that they must be so mean. I remember being made to swim across the deep end for the first time. All the kids made it across easily except an intellectually disabled kid & me. I remember crying the whole way across. It did me know harm, but it was completely unnecessary, & to make matters worse she joined in with the kids who had gotten across in taunting me & the special needs kid. DS1's current teacher is a little scary, she gets the kids to float around the pool on their backs & splashes them in the face. I have no idea why. Though to be fair she gets results. DS1 improves noticeably by the week.

When I was at Liverpool street station on Sundays waiting for our train to Harwich I found a Bootcamp magazine special, it is an one of special of a magazine called Women's fitness. It is brilliant and gives several different options for a bootcamp program, from a weekend option right up to a one month plan. It includes a very strict diet that works with the exercise program. It has recipes & menus for each day. I've started on the one month program but I'm being a little less strict as I'm having coffee and some dairy. But so far I've not had any carbs as per the diet & I'm quite enjoying the food. I think it helps that the kids are on holidays so have time to make the food rather than rushing off for school drop off. Will see if it gets results.

Beans36 Wed 08-Aug-12 20:31:44

Hi all. Wow, swimming sounds fairly full on!
I'm just cooking supper for DH. And finding holidays fairly full on. Girls gorgeous as ever, but demanding and I find I'm desperate for alcohol by about 5pm!!dh clearly thinks I'm having a whale of a time as am seeing lots of people. And it is lovely, but it's also to stop me from murdering the beautiful whinge-bags! And it's tiring trying to fill a day innit??
Never mind!

Sybs, glad you're managing to keep smiling. You are a wonder.

Dad's doing ok. He is in a lot of pain, but being upbeat throughout. I hope i can be as positive as him when I'm dying. I love him so.

Sorry, dreary!

Must go and finish my marinated pork fillet!! Impressive eh? X

KiwiPanda Thu 09-Aug-12 09:57:39

Beans You are doing so well. I would struggle to hold it together with all you are going through with your dad and having girls full time at the mo and all the rest. I'm not surprised you feel like a glass of wine at 5 - have one!!

Indith I can match your disastrous day with a disastrous night. Just about to go to bed, when DD1 wakes up howling having POOED all over herself, the bed, somehow rubbed it into her hair etc etc. Throw her in bath, howling away, clean up, change bed blah blah. takes forever to get back to sleep.

Go to bed. Car alarm opposite starts going off. REALLY LOUDLY. does not stop for 2 hours. Stops, finally start drifting off. DD2 wakes up.

AGHHHHHH

Oh and as my mastitis cleared up, I got a chest infection. I am a big, human shaped bag of germs. Need to put up one of those MISSING: HAVE YOU SEEN..? Posters for my immune system.

Rubena Thu 09-Aug-12 13:57:18

Urgh Kiwi hope you feel better soon. I was off and on sick for a month and it felt like forever with kids to look after. You are right. I need some more twitterees to follow!
Have had ds with high temp then better then dd throwing up tues night then dd better and da throwing up last night. Both ok today - really odd short duration vomity thing!
Have hardly seen dh's rellies at all except for 2 days in Dorset and they go home Sunday. Gutted. Dorset was lovely bur short snd many a story including ds streaking through the pub full of diners carrying his pjs announcing hed done a poo but cant put his pants back on - all whilw we thought he was sleeping soundly in the room above! Managed to piss off sil again yoo i think - God im a bees dick away from saying how i really feel!
Think mil is pissed as she asked dh if he wanted help with kids at weekend when I was away but he didn't reply.
Lady hope you had a nice time at ur mums. Think I'm around Monday but dh needs me to do some admin stuff for him as he's behind and wants to catch up a bit before we go away (which we still haven't decided on where yet!)
Vag Nevermind I'm sure there will be other times when not so busy. Glad you had a nice time.
Beans. Good job for staying strong. You are clearly your fathers daughter. Must be so tough.

Rubena Thu 09-Aug-12 14:07:09

Had to post before losing it but now can't remember other stuff.
Oh yes JJ hope you worked out that dilemma. I must admit I'm not against abortion. Not had one myself but friends have at young ages and I think it's better to not make a human if your not equipped to raise it. Sometimes genuine accidents happen and all that, but I respect everyone's individual beliefs. Thought a GP was not able to not refer though?
Indith hope your days have improved and Hi to all including Sybs! When are we ever going to catch up!?
Better post again as on phone and dodgy!

KiwiPanda Thu 09-Aug-12 16:18:17

Just been to see doctor. Never mind illness, he was HOT!! Honestly was rather disconcerting. There was me, DD2 crawling up my arm, sweaty, dishevelled etc.. Bah wink

VagolaJahooli Thu 09-Aug-12 17:21:46

Kiwi the hotest doctor I have ever seen was doing my pap smear. Disconcerting indeed.

Rubes, tell us more about your SIL, pwease. Is MiL cross with you or DH? That story about DS made me spit my tea. So so funny. Rubes I think you would like the diet & exercise thing I'm doing.

Beans36 Thu 09-Aug-12 20:15:05

Hee hee. Smears are so rank. A friend of mine's sister sprayed anti-smell fanny spray on before her smear and when the doctor told her it was kind of her to make an effort, turned out it was glitter spray. Genius. I think I've told you guys that before, hence the shortness of story!

Are you feeling better, Kiwi? Poor lamb. Night from hell.

Right, get ready for a furious rant from me and feel free to skip it!!! FAmily politics!

I have written but not sent a vile email to my sister. Until I've calmed down. She of alcoholic husband and selfishness. Xmas in 4 months or so, they have spent it in France for last 20 years, apart from when she was about to give birth, so they had to stay over here. Never make the effort to come over here to spend it with M&D. In fact, mum and dad have been over there 3 times, despite mum's arthritis being really bad in the cold. Anyway, as this is possibly/probably Dad's last Xmas (sorry if seems cold, have to be a bit clinical to keep together!), she is deigning to make an appearance. She rang tonight to say that she is "assuming" me and my other sister, who lives in Peterborough, will be doing a day trip for Xmas day, so she thought she would fly into Gatwick on Xmas Eve, spend the night with my parents and fly out on Xmas day. WHY would she get to stay with them? Mum is so very tired and will only be tireder. My sister's children are vile and hard work. She seems to think she has some kind of RIGHT to stay with my parents because of her "schlep" from France. I want to kill her. Sort of. I have composed this email, but I know I won't send it because I'm not brave enough like that:

Since our phone call, I have been wondering why it has left me with such a sour taste in my mouth and feeling so utterly furious with you and I think I know why.

Since you have been holidaying in France, the only times you have bothered to make the effort to come to Offham is when it has suited you - ie. pregnant with DD and I think you may have come just after you had DS, but I can't remember, I suspect not.

This year may be Dad's last and you seem to expect to have special treatment because of your "schlep" from France. DSis, I am so angry, I can hardly write this without screaming. You "assume" that Dsis2 and I will do the trip in a day. Why? Because it suits you that we should? If you're in the UK anyway the night before, then your flat in London is closer to Mum and Dad than either Beans's house or Dsis2's house. Why on earth should the one of us who has made the least effort to spend Christmas with our parents for the last 20 years suddenly gain some kind of right to spend more time in Mum and Dad's house, simply because you're travelling further. Hire a fucking car for a few days.

If you "assume" that we are selfless enough to do the travelling in one day, then you can bloody well do the same. You may think you can do it without leaving a footprint, but you can't. It will be tiring for our parents. I think I can speak on behalf of DSis2 on this too, although I haven't spoken to her about it, but we would also love to spend a night in with M&D around Christmas, but we probably won't as we are aware of Mum and Dad's needs.

This is NOT about you booking your flights and how much it will cost you to do it or change them. This is NOT about whether it's easy for you to make the journey or not. If it's that important to you, don't go to France at all, stay in the UK! Make that effort to see Dad and go on day trips to see him regularly, for a few hours at a time, even if it is a bit inconvenient for you and Andrew. This is about DAD and Mum.

My advice to you would be to look into flights from Geneva to Heathrow, stay in your flat for however long you need and, like DSis2 and me, do a daytrip to M&D on Christmas Day. Then you can fly back from Gatwick direct from M&D if you want to, or alternatively, return to London and fly back to France from Heathrow. That way, you aren't imposing on Mum and Dad at all. Seriously. Do think about it.

Wow, it's quite long. And quite fun to have written, but I'll never send it!!!!

Right, rant over! This should be "Beans's personal vitriol page!" Angry me or what? Obviously a few name and place changes to make it scan a little less well, but you get the jist! Sorry chaps!

xx

VagolaJahooli Thu 09-Aug-12 20:17:50

Aaahhhhh have had another massive screaming match with ds2 today. I actually got to the stage where I thought I would really hurt him badly. I smacked him, several times, though did it on his jeans in an attempt to not hurt him too much. But emotionally it all comes out the same doesn't it. Has anyone got any idea how to stop them escalating. I'm su it is something I am doing wrong, the way I react or something but I can't pinpoint the moment that I say something or do something that pushes him over the edge

Beans36 Thu 09-Aug-12 20:34:42

Oh Vag. That is hideous. It's not you. Please don't think that. It's such a difficult age and you can do things one way one day and it's fine. Next day same thing and all hell breaks loose. I put DD1 in her room, shut the door and walk away until she's calmed down. If we're in public I tend to pull her in close and growl threats at her. But quite often at home, I can think I'm staying calm and dealing, but something snaps and I smack. You know we have similar attitudes on this. Thinking loving thoughts at you xx

KiwiPanda Thu 09-Aug-12 20:53:32

Vag Oh hon, have been there many times. If we could say what it was that tipped us over the edge, it probably wouldn't happen. Sorry for brief post but just to say do not beat yourself up about it, you are a brilliant BRILLIANT mum

Beans Am totally sending you vile-sisters-are-vile hugs too smile Cathartic to have written even if you don't send - why don't you speak to other sister first? Always good to share specially as it sounds like she'll totally agree with you x

Beans36 Thu 09-Aug-12 21:02:12

She's on hol, but have texted her. Now feel like I'm being petulant.
Have you decided what to do about your sis, kiwi? I think bigger person probably rises above it!

JamInMyWellies Thu 09-Aug-12 21:07:30

VAg seriously please dont beat yourself up. MY DS2 is as vile as can be sometimes and infact had an epic 45 min screamthon round Sainsburys last wk and I had to sit on him to get him to calm down enough to put his seatbelt on shock I think 3 is such a ruddy hard age they are still babies in so many ways but yet are trying so hard to be big boys & girls and sometimes it just doesnt work and all hell breaks loose. I often dont think DS2 even knows why he is so angry. Big love and have a cocktail. Tomorrows another day. xx

Beans I too have had hideous issues with one of my sisters in the past involving some quite horrific emails being sent to me. But I do think you are right not to send it especially not when you are so angry. I would take the night to think about it and re write it tom. When you can be more calculating and measured. Maybe inc your other sister and word it in a way so that you can between the 3 of you get a plan in place for chrimbo which allows your parents time with you all in the least stressful way possible. Stay strong.

Beans36 Thu 09-Aug-12 21:16:35

Jam, you are wise woman. Our new nursery teacher said something so obvious the other day, but which I needed to hear re Whizz - they're still so little. We expect a lot of them and they're wee. you're a fab mum, Vag, and I think a lot of us on here find you inspiring And we seek your advice. Fret not!!

Yes, I will delete it, I think. Paste on my don't mind face and carry on. I just know she's thoughtless, but that's always the excuse used for her and it's getting a bit wearing now she's nearly 44!!!

X

Huge sympathy on the fury with 3.5 year old front. T has pushed all my and DP's buttons on the last few days and we have had to manhandle him everywhere. Shut in room as early as 6am. Biting, kicking, screaming. I thought he had turned into the devil child but it sounds like there's something going on right now.

But please be gentle with yourself, Vag, I can only echo what everyone else is saying about what a fabulous mum you are. I know it's no consolation when they are being little shits. It. will. pass. (won't it?)

Kiwi, you poor lamb, so glad you at least had the distraction of a sexy doctor. Sending lots of healing and sleeping vibes.

Beans, I am very glad you got all that out in writing. How would it be if you spoke rather than wrote? At least you wouldn't have a permanent record that she could hold against you...

For any of you early risers, I've started a thread where I try to live by Granny murray from Me Too!'s aphorisms over in chat. Yup, I need a hobby. here

VagolaJahooli Thu 09-Aug-12 22:17:35

Sorry beans I didn't see your post earlier. I actually think you could send her an email which includes that last paragraph, you could start with it something saying how tired your mum & dad are and that is why you and DSIS2 are not staying overnight. It could just be a polite email, letting her know what might be best for all. Am shocked that, in the circumstances she is going away. How long do they go to France for?

Thanks for all your kind words, it helps to know I'm not the only one. Beans I sometimes wander if smacking as a punishment is better than smacking frustration. I really don't like how I feel in these cases. And yoir right, I say all the right things and stay calm and then all of a sudden I snap and fly off the handle. Ds2 has said a couple of times recently when he does something mildly naughty "don't shout me mummy, it scares me". How bad does that make me feel!

McKayz Thu 09-Aug-12 22:54:44

Beans, I'd be bloody tempted to send it. This is about your Dad and not her.

Vag, I've had the worst day with DS1. We've been out and I swear I could have left him there and just gone home. He's the loveliest little boy in the world 80% of the time. But he's so bloody ungrateful. He's been on a steam train, to the beach, had chips and ice cream. But still demands toys and more stuff. DH had to step in after I lost my temper and he got him to calm down.

DeidreBarlow Fri 10-Aug-12 08:48:47

Good morning ladies, apologies for not being on for a while. I seem to have been very busy doing nothing lately!

beans I actually think that maybe you should send that email, or at least some of it to your sis. She clearly isn't thinking about your mum & dad at all. My own sis can be very selfish blinkered, most things revolve around her and her own until a gentle shove brings her back to reality.

vag Oh my word I hear you! I have smacked DS out of shear frustration before now, especially after all his pre-school antics. You are only human lovely and a bloody fantastic mum. It happens, this age is so challenging for all sorts of reasons. They seem to be growing up but are still so little. There is no right or wrong way to handle any of it - whatever gets you through I say! Defo agree with jam.

rubes Hope your okay,sounds like things are still manic for you at he moment.

kiwi How you feeling today?

DS has his hearing test on Wednesday. I wonder how he will get on, what if he is a bit deaf and that does account for some of his shocking behaviourhmm...maybe I'm just looking for excuses...actually he hasn't been too bad at home. Its definitely pre-school that brings the worst out in him.

Right I'd best go and get some breakfast and sort this house out. DD's 'friend' ie the object of her obsession is coming to play this morning. Not sure if that's a good or bad thing but she asked and her mum is coming for coffee too. Lovely & sunny so we shall kick them into the garden I think!

Indith Fri 10-Aug-12 09:09:22

I bloody love you lot. Elsewhere on MN smacking gets "don't do it again, violence, hitting someone smaller than you blah blah blah I have never ever smacked my child". Noone will admit to it. Well they are bloody well lying.

I lose it with dd too. She is just so bloody difficult! I hate myself for losing it. I know there are other ways to deal with it. Sometimes, sometimes I think a smack can be a good effective punishment but onl when delivered as part of dealing with things calmly not when losing it, losing it causes fear, is irrational and lacks consistancy. However, I do lose it and I yell and someties swear and I say things I shouldn't and I smack. And then I have to listen to dd playing with her toys and telling them off and saying they will get a smacked bottom and I want to die.

However, yesterday I gave a sharp, effective smack. We were out at a National Trust place and dd threw a major strop after our picnic on the way to the den building activity. She screamed and screamed, I was hurting her, it was too hot, the hill was too steep, she didn't want to build a den, she wanted to build a den, she needed to wipe her nose, she wanted to go home, she didn't want to be outside she wanted to be inside, I was squashing her.....all at full volume. I ignored and dragged and I told her I wouldn't talk to her if she shoulted at me so each new complainted was screamed several times then the screaming stopped and he nicest most polite voice came out to say "mummy I don't want to be outside" to which I replied that I understood and then the screaming started again. Eventually though she didn't stop, she was getting violent, was squirming out of my grip and running away, she was ruining the day for poor ds1 so I gave her a smack. The tantrum was over within 30 seconds of that, she walked the rest of the way happily and spent a couple of hours den building very happily.

Kiwi you win on the disasterous night!

Bean the mind boggles, it really does. I hope you manage to talk some sense into your sister. FWIW though, I know it seems to you like totally the wrong thing to do and I know it pisses you off because you would love to spend the night with your mum and dad but are sensitive to their needs but she is like this, she has always been like this and your parents still love their daughter for all her flaws, they know what she is like and accept it. I don't think it is worth fighting over, a few subtle hints perhaps but I bet your parents would rather have her for the night and spend time with her even if it tires them than have her flit away and hardly see her or have all of you fighting.

VagolaJahooli Fri 10-Aug-12 10:51:12

Oh Indith you made me cry when you talked about hearing DD talking to her toys. For me it is hearing my sweet gentle DS1 speaking to DS2 the way i do. Also when both of them are impatient with me & each other & want everything now, & I know it is my fault because I call them or ask them to do something & am annoyed if they don't answer me immediately. I think I have a little of what Nolda feels, DS1 was so easy& never screamed, whereas DS2 screams for everything! I think he is starting to see my preference for DS1. But I love them both to bits, and if given the choice of two kids like DS1 or a DS1 & a DS2 I would def go with my two boys & their lovely different personalities. Anyone off to the beach & I'm determined to enjoy them.

Beans how are you feeling about the letter this morning, have you spoken to your other sister?

Kiwi, how are you today? Any sign of your immune system?

Kayz your DH is very good with the boys, they clearly love & have so much respect for him. Such a good example for them.

JamInMyWellies Fri 10-Aug-12 12:53:08

Bon voyage! See you next wk.

KiwiPanda Fri 10-Aug-12 14:20:24

Hello all! Spot Your Granny Murray thread made it onto the Mumsnet talk newsletter email thingy, I see wink. Fame! (of sorts)

Vag I think I might finally be on the mend, yes. Think it was the hot doctor who did it wink. Have not run now for 8 days and desperate to get going again before I lose too much fitness, so hoping to be able to go tomorrow. DH not on Limpics duty until pm so should be able to go to running club hooray!

Re smacking/ kids, I've had DD1 say to me - apropos of nothing, when we've just been chatting away, "I don't like it when you smack me Mummy". sad. It's not like is a regular occurence but it obviously makes a big impression (not literally I hasten to add) Then again the other day she burst into tears and howled "I'm sad Mummy!!" and I said "why?" and she howled "I'm sad because I need a poo and you said we aren't home yet!"

Errr yup. That's a tragedy and no mistake

Beans36 Fri 10-Aug-12 14:29:45

Thanks all. Tips always gratefully received. I have slept on it, as advised and find it matters less this morning. I am just always staggered by how entirely wrapped up in herself she is. Makes me fume and sad and if we weren't sisters, we definitely wouldn't be friends. I love her dearly, but it doesn't necessarily mean I like her particularly, IYSWIM?

Indith - you are a far nicer person than me. And, to be honest, it's more about my Mum, who spends her life putting us off coming to stay as she says it tires Dad out. Truth be told, Dad would love all of us to come and stay. But what she means is it tires her out! She won't really let us do anything and wants to do it all herself and insists on doing all the cooking and clearing up! Drives me bonkers! But then I see myself doing exactly the same when friends come to stay - she needs to learn to accep the help we're offering!

I don't know if this makes you feel better or worse, Vag, but one of my daughters' (not entirely sure where apostrophe goes there - any clues?) favourite games is naughty step. They put their dollies on the naughty step and if they continue to be naughty, they get shouted at and smacked. I can't think where they have got that idea from. Ahem. But they spend so much happy time doing it, I don't have the heart to stop them. Today has been a surprisingly easy game, especially as am in the throws of potty training DD2! She is being a little wonder and only one accident so far... Although a poo has yet to make an appearance. Could be interesting...

Jam! HAVE A MARVELLOUS TIME!

Indith Fri 10-Aug-12 17:18:01

My sister is much the same, wrapped up in herself and her life and yes I love her and care about her but we don't get on. It amazed me when I first was with dh to find he spends a good hour a week on the phone with his brother. Anyway I have had to come to accept that my parents do get frustrated with my sister but they love her so <<shrugs>> all I can do is hint at things she could change but I can't wade in. Her wedding and my dad has been a sticking point recently. Not on the same scale as with your dad of course.

Have a great time Jam!

Today has been mental! dcs shattered as they didn't go to sleep until late because dd was pissing around after falling asleep in the car so they are very grumpy but dd fell asleep in the car again. Oops. Have managed to bung dinner on now feeding baby waiting for friend to come pick a sleeping bag up. My house has transformed into a complete hovel. I'm sure it was quite respectable a couple of days ago. Have also stupidly offered some baby stuff for free on a local FB forum that is in the bags that were going to go to the charity shop and have people asking about it so I need ot go drag it back out of the car and remind myself what is in there so I can answer questions. Then I'll have to organise pick ups. why did I do it?

Oh and got to town today, decided it was too hot and since the old buggy lives in the car boot and ds2 now big enough I'd stick him in there instead of the sling. Of course I got him in it then realised there was a rather vital screw missing and the seat was only half supported. Oops and buggar. Luckily I had a sling!

Dh was supposed to be taking the kids off my hands a fair bit this weekend then informed me he was rowing Sat morning and then the plaster said he could come do the loft Sunday but dh has some bits of boarding left to do so he'll have to do those Saturday afternoon and even if he does take them out Sunday I won't have peace as the plasterer will be here.

Never mind! At least it will be done so we can get it painted, hit Ikea and move the girl in! Then I can think about when to kick the baby out. I love co-sleeping with little babies but I am not really qualified to be a full on attachment type as I also love kicking them out.

Beans36 Fri 10-Aug-12 18:42:20

This is what I sent instead:

Hi DSis

Been thinking about Xmas since our chat last night.  My advice would be that you avoid staying a night in parents house and fly into Heathrow and stay at your home, and then go to parents house for the day on Xmas Day, same as Claire and me.  Then either stay another night back in London and fly back out of Heathrow, or fly back from Gatwick direct from parents house.  I'm sure there'll be loads of trains down there, or else you can hire a car.

I just honestly think that it would be far kinder to Mum and Dad if you didn't stay - nothing personal!  They both get so very tired these days, and there's no knowing how Dad will be come Xmas.  And that generally dictates how tired Mum is too. 

Bossy little sister, but you did ask for my advice!!!!! 

Hope you're still having a lovely time.  Pru seems to have cracked potty training and is weeing on the potty with impunity.  It helps that it's so hot they've spent the day naked!  Although craps are yet to be tested.  Suspect I may find a curler hidden somewhere around the house at some point.  Joy. 

I put last bit on so I didn't piss her off. Ever the compromiser! Spoke to Mum and she actually asked me to send it as DSis's children are so dreadful she doesn't want them to stay. How awful!! Eek.

Indith your DH needs a talking to!!?

Indith Fri 10-Aug-12 19:44:57

That sounds good Beans, hope it works.

To be fair to dh he didn't know about the plasterer when he organised rowing, we had talked about him coming Tuesday. The extra stuff dh has to do up there before the plasterer is fairly basic and will make it look better finished but isn't vital, we'd agreed dh would do it before plasterer so long as he did it evenings as I need him in the day for a bit of a break, I'm finding the holidays hard tbh. Anyway this means he'll have to do it all Sat afternoon. Oh well.

Trying to persuage tired ds2 to go to sleep as ds1 and dd splash in the bath after playing out down the back road past bedtime. I fear it is getting rather shouty in there. Come on ds2 sleep!

VagolaJahooli Sat 11-Aug-12 10:50:44

Woop Woop. I bought the bootcamp issue of Women's fitness magazine and noticed a typo. They had said that 8g per kilo of bodyweight is the recommended daily intake for an adult. However, it is actually .8gm (or .5-1gm technically depending on how much muscle building your doing, but av is .8). Anyhoo, I wrote to the editor to point it out (I know nerd) & she was very grateful & sent me a free mag, & it just arrived this morning!

Also, Beans I didnt realise that story was real. Does your friend realise that story was doing the rounds on email a few years back, but in that story she had given her lady bits a bit of a freshen up with a cloth in the bathroom which it turned out her daughter had used to store her left over sparkles.

Beans36 Sat 11-Aug-12 16:25:45

Quick smug post, which will doubtless come back to bite me on the arse... DD2 seems to have cracked potty training in two days. Takes herself off for a wee and even did a poo without prompting today!! Extraordinary. Sure once the novelty wears off she'll regress!

Vag, that's so nice to get a freebie. Nothing more pleasing!!

X

McKayz Sun 12-Aug-12 09:00:27

That is brilliant Beans!! Well done DD2!!

I have come with similar smugness! DS2 appears to be completely potty trained!! He hasn't had an accident in a week. Even his overnight nappies are completely bone dry. So pleased with him.

Indith Sun 12-Aug-12 09:25:16

Hurrah for potty training!

I think we have a success of sorts here too as ds1 seems to have got night sussed finally! So far we have had 3 dry nights, one wet but he woke up as got out of bed mid wee so just a small patch in bed and he did the rest in the loo followed by another 3 dry. I'm trying to get 7 dry in a row and bribing him with the promise of a new lego model grin. If I get him sorted I'll try dd who probably could have done it ages ago but we couldn't face it on top of her waking 10 times a night.

Beans36 Sun 12-Aug-12 12:26:39

HURRAH! How lovely.

We had a BBQ last night for 8 and it was really good fun, but wow it's hard work on us wimmin isn't it? Man stands outside and does caveman cooking, while we slave doing salads, marinating meat, laying table, getting it all sorted. We all got very drunk and I am feeling exhausted today. I went to bed at 1am and left 3 of the boys up, including DH. They were staying over. This morning, outside and the kitchen were totally cleared away (I'd done the washing up!!!), but DH had done the lot and the other lazy buggers had sat and chatted while he did it around them! How naughty! But I suppose they are guests!

DH has taken the girls to his parents' place as they have a pool, so the girls can swim. His sister is there with her little boy, so it's really nice. I opted to stay at home as it's rare to get time to myself. DH said he was fine with it, but was obviously a bit miffed I'm being so antisocial. But originally it was just going to be a swim and I wasn't expected to go and now it's lunch as well. Meantime, I'm now feeling really guilty. BUT I have hoovered the whole house, changed various sheets, hung out two loads of washing, cleaned the kitchen and the bathrooms and done an online shop. HOW am I feeling guilty??? V annoying. Anyway, chores done and I'm going to put my feet up.

What's the news on here?

Indith Sun 12-Aug-12 12:50:01

Amazing how you can feel guilty at having "time to yourself" when you are actually doing housework isn't it? We all do it though. "oh poor dh with all the children, can he cope? We should make a resolution to feel no guilt!

Plasterer has just left, the job looks good. Fingers crossed dh won't have to be away this week so we can paint Thurs/Fri then hit Ikea at the weekend and move dd in!

KiwiPanda Mon 13-Aug-12 08:45:54

Oh this is so like maternity leave. DH makes the odd comment about how I have all that "time off" when DD1 is at nursery and DD2 naps. Um yeah those clothes magically wash themselves and fold themselves into your wardrobe, the house has magic fairies to clean it etc etc

I have woken up with an absolutely horrible headache and the grumps angry and we've run out of muesli because DD1 ate it all. Why can't she eat rubbish cereal like normal children eh??

Rubena Mon 13-Aug-12 15:42:55

Beans, I think the email you sent was good. I need to learn to be more like that. I'd have sent the first one in my rage and then regretted it probably. I hope she sees sense and follows your advice. Well done on the potty training too! I need to thanks you as after I was really strict with DD listening to your sleep lady advice, she seems to sleep pretty good now and she gets no milk no matter what at all after 7pm - just has water next to her bed. it was a really really hard slog and took longer than I thought (and I often do the cold turkey thing) but worth it.

Obe I meant to say I'm glad you were looked after well on the way over to the US, I have a much better appreciation for parents flying with kids now I have them myself. Hope you had a fab time.

Jam sounds like you had a great time on your dirty weekend!

Kiwi, ML is hard! Little babies are hard! It's much harder than swanning around the Olympic stadium! envy speaking of which, I quite enjoyed the closing ceremony, in a music concert kind of way! My friend was in it (but one of the crappest bits it's say!) he was in the fashion bit walking right behind Naomi and kept sending updates etc, and a vid of her getting ready! (after it of course)

On the smacking - someone said it'd be a lie if we said never but I honestly can say I don't think I've ever smacked although I have grabbed him on the arm so hard and practically cut off circulation and a few things like that etc etc which is probably much worse!

Vag, well done on the free mag!
it's a long story about sil. Her and I get on fine really - well it's slightly fake at times as she has made several comments over the years that have really upset me but I have let slide (odd for me) but I haven't wanted to make it hard for dh as if I kicked off - she would too and it would blow up. This time, basically we had a nice night staying at a pub they work at and although at dinner, but barely saw them as they were working and we left the following day. Got home and wrote a lovely FB message to thank them for the lovely weekend and said it was all perfect etc - got nothing in reply. About a week later I notice I'm no longer their FB 'Friend'! No message, no call, just no idea at all why and that was the worst part. Thought about it for ages and decided there is no way it could be about DS running through the pub in just PJ top nor could it be dh confirming he wanted a latte to the waitress who thought he was having a dig at her accent (not a chance massive misunderstanding) and the only thing I can come up with is she has perhaps noticed that dh's dad is on my FB (I accepted about 2 months ago after much thought as it's a massive family divide) Thing is - if this IS the reason, I would understand (sort of) if she had of messaged me about it first. Other thing is, there are privacy settings for this exact reason! And furthermore, I have not and would not have ever put a single photo of her or any other family on there who I know wouldn't want it. So, I have not heard a word since except asked other family if any clue and they have said no confused

Indith Mon 13-Aug-12 15:54:51

How odd Rubes.

I think it was me who said people are lying about smacking. I think I meant more you are lying if you say you have never lost it with your child and done something you regret be it saying something you shouldn't or handling them in a way you shouldn't. Goodness but children are experts at pressing all the wrong buttons at times.

I swear at the moment dd is asking to be murdered. Nothing I can do for her is right. If I pay for them to go on the merrygoround she tantrums because I won't let her have an icecream. If we go to the park she wants to be at home. If we stay home she wants to go out.

Oh and she doesn't love me she only loves her daddy and her brothers and all her cousins. But not me. Thanks dd.

She will love me again when she is back at nursery grin. I always get a big hug and "mummy! I missed you! And then you came to pick me up!" after nursery.

I have lurgy. Urgh. Dh the absolute love took the dcs to the park for 45 mins between phone calls. He was on the verge of taking some time off I think this morning (and he has never, ever taken time off work to look after dcs when I've been ill. NEVER) but had unavoidable meetings and by the time those were done I had managed not to expire completely. Dcs have done a fair job of playing indoors really and not too much longer to go now! I have defrosted some milk and put it in the fridge for dh so once he finishes work I can go straight for a nap no matter when I last fed ds2.

traceface Mon 13-Aug-12 15:55:54

hi ladies smile
Just a quick hello from me. I'm back from a lovely holiday in Cornwall and now back to packing my life into boxes. How is it that however many boxes we pack, there is still an entire houseful of stuff left? confused Still no date but we reckon end of the week or next monday. I'm so inpatient to move now!
Re toilet stuff, P is basicallay dry in the day but does have damp pants because she never goes until she's about to pee - and often already starts to pee before she gets there. And we haven't even attempted night times yet because she wakes every morning with a really heavy nappy. Although, bizarrely, when Lucy and I were away, DH ran out of nappies (!) so put her to bed one night without one and she woke up for a wee and then slept till morning without wetting the bed! How odd. Her sleep is still exhausting me - she wakes up about 3 times a night and wants me to lie in bed with her or hold her hand. I'm sure it's all my own doing but so hard to break. And in the day she is mega mega mega clingy - won't leave my side at all and cries of I go to the loo! I hope it's just a phase. DH is finding it a bit hard that she is so reluctant to go to him.
Anyway, must go,
see you soon xxx

Beans36 Mon 13-Aug-12 17:48:36

Rubes, so glad that sleep expert's advice helped you. Trace - could you do the ignoring thing? It would be a couple of tough weeks, but it might make your life a lot better in the long run? I can give you her number if you'd like? She's £15 for a phone consultation, which is pretty cheap and she seemed really down to earth and normal, which I liked. this is her

Indith - DD1 keeps asking me to go to prison so daddy can look after them the whole time. Little sh*t. She'd be lost without me! Where's the gratitude eh?

Saw the lovely Sybs today - what a treat it was. And her lovely littles. They are just gorgeous.

Am off to see M&D on Thursday, which will be nice. Even staying the night!!!!! HA! After all I've said about my sister! Hahahahah!

Dad sadly not coming to North Wales with us next week. His leg is too sore and he wouldn't be able to walk down to the beach. Or, in fact anywhere really. He says he finds it agony to walk much further than 100yds. Poor poor Dad. But he's keeping his chin up. They had a lunch party on Sunday and someone asked Mum if she was ok and if there was anything they could do for her and she said she started crying. Poor Mum! She's so stoic and just gets on with it always, but she's clearly really struggling. She's just so bad at receiving love!

Right, I must go now and look after my nippers. Caught DD2 starting to do a wee in her booster seat at supper. She did say she was doing one, so I whisked her to the loo!

Indith Tue 14-Aug-12 09:04:36

Prison Beans? Delightful. Reminds me of the time ds1 threatened to, stab me in my bed. Where do they get it?

My immune system is also missing. If found please return.

Last night was shaping up to be quite good really, ds2 was sleeping quite soundl between feeds and at 3am was settled into a good stretch. Then ds1 came in having lost his doudou and dh replied with a very loud and enthusiastic "Oh dear let's go find him" and woke the baby up. Fed him back to sleep quickly but he did a huge poo. Change of nappy and clothes and he was very awake. An hour later I just have him back to sleep, I kick dh who is snoring and he sits up and yells at me and wakes the bloody baby up again. argh!

My baby is being grizzly. I feel like poo. My house belongs on how clean is your house because I've been unwell so nothing has been done. I'm going to have to stir myself.

LadyThompson Tue 14-Aug-12 09:39:15

Hello ladies! Was at Mum's all last week then vv busy weekend - party, then some friends to stay who are shortly getting posted to Canberra for 4 whole years...Will be finding some time later to do a catch up, have been lurking a bit.

I now have a bit of period pain and backache so I will have to sit down for a bit this morning anyway. Back in an hour or two.

VagolaJahooli Tue 14-Aug-12 15:30:01

Oh dear Lady, my thoughts are with your friends.

Indith, so where will DH be sleeping tonight, doghouse maybe? Sorry your feeling so rough, not fun. I feel your pain on the house thing. Nearly 6 weeks of school holidays has taken its toll on our house, it needs a deep deep clean.

Well good news for teamVag, my latest strict diet & bootcamp program has shown results. In just one week I've gone from 71.5kg to 70.1! Yay. I'm a smidge away from being within normal weight for height. Yay, yay. I'm slightly disappointed that all the push ups & circuit training has made me resemble Jess Ennis, but baby steps :-)

KiwiPanda Wed 15-Aug-12 05:48:15

Oh god. Anyone point me in the direction of a good early waking thread? DD2 now getting up at 4.45 and takes me an hour of feeding her (and trying to get her back to sleep and failing) before she will not be grumpy. She is clearly therefore still tired but WIlL NOT SLEEP aghhhh

Any suggestions welcome. Literally, any.
Am prepared to consider anything (eyes Sellotape and baby straight jacket)

JamInMyWellies Wed 15-Aug-12 08:14:51

Ugh kiwi that is pants.

The curse of knobby husbands strike again. Yesterday had an awful headache vom thing. Felt rubbish. But had plans with the boys to see my DSIS and niece took a few mins throughout the day to feel a bit shit but carried on today DH seems to have the same thing. So has taken the day off work and is in bed. angryangry how come he gets to lie down on a darkened rm but I have to carry on as normal. Not fair!

sybilfaulty Wed 15-Aug-12 08:20:06

Because he is so much more ill than you , Jam! I'm surprised you can't see that! Poor you, sounds miserable. Hope you are feeling better today.

Am pisssed off with my husband for giving me the silent treatment because I am going out tonight and tomorrow! Am also cross with work for trying to change things after hey have been agreed. We are all a bunch of lawyers so it shouldt surprise them that you can't do that. Hey oh, I dont mind a fight.

Picnic with friends in the park today. Hurray!

Hope you ar well.

Indith Wed 15-Aug-12 08:27:11

Next time the husbands are ill we should just go out and leave them with the dcs all day. After all that is what they do to us when they go off to work and we are ill isn't it?

Of to a National Trust place today with some other MNers so got to make a picnic this morning.

I'm sure I cleaned the kitchen and bathroom yesterday but the place still looks trashed. I can't wait for school to start!

Congrats on the weight loss Vag

Lady you need to slow down and spend more time on t'interwebs grin.

My baby seems to be jsut about starting to remember how to fall asleep again. Woohoo! Doubt it will last. He did a poo way too early this morning though and got up for the day. Urgh.

LadyThompson Wed 15-Aug-12 10:07:05

Yes, Indith, I do grin I fully meant to sit down yesterday and ended up doing...heaven knows what all day. Have a lovely picnic, that sounds nice.

I think The Commune beckons again grin Although DP is actually being good at the moment.

Back later AND I REALLY MEAN IT THIS TIME...so much to catch up on.

JollyBear Wed 15-Aug-12 10:12:22

Marking my place for catching up this afternoon!

JollyBear Wed 15-Aug-12 13:15:16

Hello everyone,

Finally caught up. Phew!

I'm relieved to hear 3 and a half is proving to be a tricky age for others. L is a total wingemonster at the moment. She repeats 'that's not fair' on a loop. It is exhausting.

Re smacking. I've not smacked... I've lost my temper, shouted and manhandled so I'm not on the moral highground! J already seems harder work then L so I'm not sure how I'll handle her as she gets older.

Beans Good email to your sister. You are being very patient with her.

Trace Hope the move goes smoothly. I remember being perplexed as to how full the house was even with half of it in boxes!

J is walking quite well now. Still wobbly for an 18 month old! J is almost the age that l was when I got pregnant with J. Astonishing! L has become obsessed with Cloudbabies and wants to watch it on iplayer all the time. It is just awful. So fluffy and vacuous.

Going to make rice pudding now as we are overloaded with milk. Rock and roll!

McKayz Thu 16-Aug-12 08:57:16

Morning,

I never seem to have time to keep up during the holidays. Especially with DH going on Sunday for 9 weeks.

Trace, I hope the move goes well. I hate moving, we need to move in the next year or so.

Kiwi, I hope you can get DD2 to sleep longer. DS2 was horrendous and finally stopped waking early when he was about 3.

DD has slept through the past 4 nights!! I wake up with rock hard boobs and she needs to feed for about half an hour but I am loving the sleep. She's also smiling properly now. It is so very cute but stops as soon as I try to take a picture.hmm

I hope everyone is well and that the DHs are behaving now.

KiwiPanda Thu 16-Aug-12 09:48:39

We're currently looking after a friend's DD (3.5). Me to her (playing with doctors kit)

"Are you going to be a doctor when you grow up?"

Her: "No, I'm going to be a nun"

grin

McKayz Thu 16-Aug-12 09:59:01

Oooh I forgot to tell you the HVs latest wisdom!! Apparently DD holds her head up too well for a baby of her age. So we need to find a way to stop her. How???

Indith Thu 16-Aug-12 10:42:40

Put a brick on her head Kayz?

It will be the sling, babies carried upright in slings often have very good head control and muscle control in general as it is actually a pretty good work out for them to be carried that way.

An antidote to the daft HCP, another local MNer took her baby dd to the consultant for a routine hip check (breech, clicky hip) and on seeing that she was in a sling he said that before he came to the UK (think he was African) he had never heard of hip dysplasia and he thought it should b compulsary for all clicky hipped babies to be carried in slings smile

Kiwi I suppose a nun os a fairl good calling grin.

Dishwasher up and running. It seems the dc's water bottles are not dishwasher proof. May have to go to Sainsbo's later grin.

KiwiPanda Thu 16-Aug-12 14:16:31

Kayz perhaps you should sing her "jelly on a plate" until her head wobbles in time grin

So ladies - advice needed on the sister situation. As you may remember she wrote me a 4 page letter all about herself with considerable rewriting of history and how our relationship has changed since her daughter was born and she doesn't know why (err cos she took 100k of my great aunts money and because she changed totally and become utterly uninterested in anything other than her family)

I haven't replied yet as I was ill for ages and DH was AWOL at Olympics etc etc. now she has texted me saying she's in London on Sunday, would I like to meet on Monday. Honest answer would be a big fat NO. Should I reply to letter first given she (ignoring what i had requested about speaking in person) had insisted on getting her words in first? Haven't replied to text yet either. No idea what to do.

JollyBear Thu 16-Aug-12 15:12:44

Kiwi Do you want to meet her? I'd not you can either be honest and tell her exactly why in a long email or if you want to mull over the situation for longer make up an urgent work meeting or something.

When Dh was about 8 a family friend asked him what he wanted to be when her grew up and he replied 'a criminal'.

VagolaJahooli Thu 16-Aug-12 19:57:38

JB, its a growth industry, they always need staff.

Kiwi, gosh that all sounds too hard, can you ignore and pretend you have had problems with your phone. I guess if you meet up you could get it over with but we are gonna need to go over what you want to say to her. You could always state how you feel? How do you feel?

Kayz, that almost tops that HV of mine that started talking to our cat....like actually mioawed at it.

I can't remember anything else I've read but have been lurking.

DS1's birthday tomorrow, can't believe how 7yrs have gone so fast. My sweet lovely little man. I made a cake but it hasn't gone well so will have to make another tomorrow.

Indith Thu 16-Aug-12 20:16:58

Aw Vag, 7 is so big! Happy Birthday for tomorrow Big Boy Vag.

Kiwi gosh. You know I'm not sure I'd be able to meet face to face without having written back. At least with writing oyu have the chance to be calm and considered and have a proper answer to her letter. Once you've done that at least you both know how each other feels.

Ds1 has chosen his lego model online and is eagerly awaiting his parcel for managing a full week of being dry at night. I'm very proud of him. He has come so, so far since this time last year.

Dd on the other hand is being a little oik that I would cheerfully strangle. The terrible 3s are bloody hard work! She has been pooing her pants all the bloody time recently and today did a shit on the floor, ground it into the carpet and smeared it all over herself. She followed it up a little later with another poo in her pants angry. I have now entered into a deal where all poo anywhere that is not a toilet will get the bottom step and all poo in toilet will get a sticker. Sticker charts have never worked on her before but she is all excited by ds1's treat getting from his stickers so fingers crossed. 5 stickers will get a small treat (I need to get some bubbles or bouncy balls or something) and 10 will get a bigger treat. I have a funny feeling I will end up dishing out a treat and then she will just go right back to pooing in pants but hey ho we can but try.

I seem to remember though ds1 going through a poo phase at the same sort of age. He used to poo at night then fish it out of his nappy and smear it all over his headboard. We used to go in and find this stinking, shit covered boy with poo under his nails and all over his hands and a coat of poo drying on the bed. It was gross. The child sucks his thumb, sometimes we wouldn't hear him at it and would only find him asleep!

traceface Thu 16-Aug-12 22:45:54

hello smile
kiwi that's tricky. I think I'd have wanted to respond to your sister in writing first, so you were on equal footing, as it were. Any chance to write a reply soon?
JB nice to see you again. Can't believe J is 18 months! I've not seen cloud babies - sounds like i'm not missing much!
Still surrounded by boxes here - all parties ready to move but solicitors being annoyingly slow. Anyway, it looks like Tuesday will be moving day smile Can't wait!
Well must go to sleep now...
see you soon xxx

KiwiPanda Fri 17-Aug-12 07:29:03

Thanks for all advice. Think you are all right that I should write first..

Vag does DD1 like Star Wars?? I have a T-shirt (brand new) he might like if he does

VagolaJahooli Fri 17-Aug-12 09:19:10

Kiwi DS1 does like Star wars though hasn't seen it yet as I want to wait until DS2 is a little older but he likes all the characters. More importantly DH likes it, hence why the boys are so aware of it. I would love the shirt for him. I can send you the postage cost.

How are you feeling do you think all your lurgies cleared to. With the letter, could you write it, I know you won't get to send it, but just to get everything clear in your head that you want to say. What do you want to get out of the meeting, it seems like she wants to maximize the guilt on your part, rather than a resolution, so you might have to be ready to be talked at.

Trace, this part of all the house stuff can be the most stressful bit but you seem quite chilled. Thinking of you this weekend.

Also we are coming over to the great northeast on the 13th til the 16thish so will have to sort out a meet up. Will be staying in Caistor but will have a car.

VagolaJahooli Fri 17-Aug-12 09:27:52

Oops forgot to say the month, we are coming in October.

JamInMyWellies Fri 17-Aug-12 09:32:13

Indith thanks for that, eating my breakfast when I got to your poo post.

Kiwi, I would find it difficult not to say something to her when you meet. It would be especially hard as you have not responded to her letter.

HAppy Birthday big boy VAG!

Am knackered these boys are going to have me on my knees before the holidays are over. Loving them but knackered.

traceface Fri 17-Aug-12 12:53:58

vag I will try to meet up with you when you're in the north smile

Ok so here's my cheeky plug for my sponsorsip page for the Great North Run...

uk.virginmoneygiving.com/TraceyRuddle

but please don't feel you have to!

Back later xxx

Indith Fri 17-Aug-12 13:14:13

You are most welcome Jam grin.

Vag will be great if we can sort a meet up.

Trace I've a bit of a no sponsorship policy (we budget everything) however you'll be pleased we already have a monthly direct debit for them smile

Is it still against the law to murder your children? Just come back to this post after breaking off to clean up another carpet ingrained all over legs and hands and feet poo. Think I need to make time this weekend to get the Vax out.

McKayz Fri 17-Aug-12 13:16:01

Vag, I will try and meet up with you. DH is away then so am limited to bus and train but will certainly try.

Trace, will sponsor you on payday!

Obergene Fri 17-Aug-12 13:37:10

Hey Ladies,

We are back from our lovely holiday in the USA. It was so fab: meeting old friends, watching the girls be flower girls at a stunning wedding, whale watching, hanging out on deserted beaches, exploring mountains in Yosemite (both girls managed daily 5k hikes in 30+ degrees!). All great really although the last 48 hours of plane journeys and jet lag has bought me down with a bit of a bump.

Veg - happy Birthday to AK! He shares DD1's birthday as you know although she is 6 today. We are about to go for a picnic in the park and I have baked some Hello Kitty cupcakes. When asked what she wanted for presents she said "breast feeding animals". Er, ok. Amazingly I found this it has magnetic nipples!

Trace, I will sponser you, how is the training going? And good luck with the move.

Indith - yuk, yuk, yuk to the poo. I actually think murder may be justified in the circs!

Jolly - how did your DD2 age so quickly? Wow!

Any progress from those of you going for number 3: Beans, Jam and maybe Lady (and others)? DH and I were sharing rooms with the DDs throughout most of our trip which rather hindered our efforts!

Wow, that holiday sounds amazing, Obes, am proper envy. Sympathies for the being back here malarkey, though hope that the weather is at least somehow compensating. That is a quality toy as well. Does it mean that you can attach anything to the magnets though? I know my two would find it hilarious to find various metal objects to feed from the dog...

Vag, happy birthday DS1! Hope he had a lovely day. You certainly don't look old enough to have a seven year old <simpers>

Indith that poo sounds like such a nightmare. Your poor, poor thing. sad.

T has gone off to London with DP today for his first trip to the smoke since he left at 9 months. I am hoping they return...

My Granny Murray thread is somehow still going. I realise I have now committed myself to watching it every morning for the forseeable. Should have through it through before posting...

Oh, and Kiwi, did you get any advice on the early waking lark from anyone? it's still bonkers early here too, and both of them - only bonus is that we can put them to bed for 7 now, where it used to be 9.

B is being adorable in start contrast to T at the moment. He has the odd rage, but is otherwise just the most angelic child. I wish I could pickle him right now <sigh>

Indith Fri 17-Aug-12 15:22:17

2 more poo incidents since the last post. 2!

I just don't understand it. She just keep shitting then sitting in it oblivious. But she can't be oblivious. And it is perfectly normal poo, no signs of anything dodgy going on. Not loose, not liquidy bits of overflow that would signal constipation. Just normal poo. Lots of it. All over my fucking house.

Trying to give as little attention as possible and will go completely over the top with praise should she finally go on the loo.

Any ideas? Seriously. Anything.

I'm considering giving her some fybogel for a few days if I can get it down her to bulk it up and hopefully amplify the signals that she needs to go? Just soemthing to try to break the pattern.

sybilfaulty Fri 17-Aug-12 18:46:17

Indith, I wouldn't do fybogel as it might have the opposite effect of softening and bulking, so it would slip out more easily (and there might be more of it!). I debated with M not giving him much f and V so that it would be harder to pass and he'd know but I didn't in the end. He just grew out of it and (bar a tummy upset) hasn't missed for 2 months. He did poo in his pants for 6 whole months though so I share your sadness. Can you pop her back in a nappy for a few weeks then have another go? With hindsight, I wish I'd done that.

Off to IOW tomorrow. WIll try to read on phone or Ipad if there is WIfi. Have a good week.

Indith Sat 18-Aug-12 08:52:28

I can't put her back in a nappy, she hasn't been in one for around a year and a half!

Ho hum. We'll see. I think I thought of fybogel because that is what worked for ds1 to amplify the sensation of needing a poo. He had completely different medical issues though. Dd is just being a stubborn little creature. Yesterday's tally was 2 on living room carpet. 1 on the sofa and 1 on the stairs. Then one on the toilet!

VagolaJahooli Sat 18-Aug-12 13:55:35

Indith aside from the bloody annoying locations of the expolsion of the poo, that does seem like a lot of faeces. What is she eating?

Had a lovely evening at the beach for DS1's birthday last night, then this morning met a bunch of his friends and their families for brunch at a beach bar that does the best breaky in the world. Have just got back after lots of chatting, kids playing & lots of swimming all round. The water is amazingly nice at the moment. If this is global warming I'm up for it.

Indith Sat 18-Aug-12 14:27:37

She always has done a lot of poo. None so far today thankfully grin. She has a perfectly normal pretty balanced diet. Lots of fruit and veg, lots of pasta, lentils and other pulses, bit of meat. Mushrooms. Lots of mushrooms. Often raw at the checkout because she can't wait to eat them.

Just spent the morning in Ikea. A nice man in a van will be bringing us dd's new wardrobe for separating the dcs into bedrooms, a new sofabed for the new guest bedroom/office, some blanket boxes for throwing outgrown clothes to wait for ds2 to grow into and other assorted loft related crap and more Trofast storgae than you can shake a stick at. Amongst other things. By the time we got over the £600 mark I lost the plot. Hotdogs and chips for lunch at the checkouts grin.

VagolaJahooli Sat 18-Aug-12 18:03:16

What a brilliant diet she has. DS2 loves mushrooms too and be quite forceful when he wants a raw one.

ZuleikaJambiere Sat 18-Aug-12 23:18:58

Hello ladies, I am so long overdue a catch up it is embarrassing - I've scrolled through for my last post and it was on the 1st! I have been lurking though.  Someone down the road is having a BBQ/party (they do every summer) and this year they've got a live band in their garden, they're pretty good and playing a good set of songs, so we've opened our windows and I'm enjoying the vibe while I type

Firstly happy birthdays to all the big girls and boys this week - Vag boy and Deids and Obes girls. And good news on some successful potty training going on too, hooray! Oh, and little Jolly is walking, so lovely. And welcome back from your hols Obes and Jam envy

I am very happy to read of so many others hitting the 'terrible threes', I'm pretty convinced it's a whole lot worse than the terrible twos, not least because DD has the verbal skills to argue, talk back, negotiate etc etc, whereas when she was younger it was obvious that the main cause of it was frustration at not being able to communicate and articulate as well as she wanted.  We regularly get 'it's not fair', 'it's all your fault Mum', flounce, strop, flounce. I often have to check the calendar and remind myself that she is 3 and a half, not 13 and a half. But, saying that, when she's on good form she is adorable and great company. Isn't there a poem or nursery rhyme that went 'when she was good she was very, very good, but when she was bad, she was awful'? That was written about DD.  Adding my two penn'orth (a bit late) into the smacking discussion, which I found very interesting read some honest opinions on (rather than the wondermum versions on the rest of MN).  I have never smacked the girls, but it's not because I'm against it. I was smacked as a child, only a couple of times, and hell, I learnt my lesson. I vividly remember Mum sending me to her room and making me wait there for 5 minutes before coming to smack me.  I see now that it was a time out for her, so that she wasn't smacking me in a fit of rage, but controlled and with a clear 'I am going to do this because ...'. If I do smack DD, I want it to have the same very clear message my Mum gave me. That's not to say I haven't felt the rage and wanted to hurt her, as I have felt it too many times. There is one episode that still makes me feel terrible, I'd asked DD to go to the loo before bed and she refused and was pissing around and playing for time and making me crosser and crosser. I'd done the cajoling, threatening no stories, counting, shouting and in the end I picked her up and plonked her on the loo and held her so tight that she couldn't move. She was wriggling and I was digging my fingers into her ribs. And poor DD1 was crying and saying 'it's hurts, you're hurting me' and I yelled in her face that if she sat still and did as I asked I wouldn't have to hold her so tight. The next day I read on MN that apparently bruising to the ribs and torso, where I was holding DD1, is often a sign of abuse. DD hadn't bruised, but I still weep to think that I'm an abuser. I know that is silly and I'm not, but I love my girls and would kill anyone who tried to hurt them, so why does it happen that I can be pushed so far myself? But we all get pushed, and I'm just pleased you've all been so honest to talk about being in the same boat sad

Have you made moves with your sister yet Kiwi? And talking of sisters, did you get a response from yours Beans?  Are you still leaving DH to deal with DD2 at night, or has he conceded that the sleep trainer might be right?

Indith I hear ya with the hair loss, mine is horrific at the moment. I'm so grateful that I, ahem, still have SPD and so can't cancel the cleaner yet, she's wonder woman with the hoover! No advice on your DDs pooing, but could it be attention seeking? DD1 still randomly wets herself or plays up or does something ridiculous when I'm in the middle of feeding or changing DD2, and will admit she was just bored and wanted my attention

Good luck with the move Trace, and yes, I'll sponsor you (and if I forget then come and give my knuckles a rap)

Spot I saw T's comment about Rhyme Rocket on fb, DD loves it and often tries to find rhyming words, with varying levels of success 'Do tree and wee rhyme? Do cheese and knees rhyme? Does apple and apple juice rhyme?' Last week I let out a very un- ladylike burp, which DD followed immediately with a huge fart and 'Mummy, we rhyme, burp and trump rhyme' grin. BTW, I'm half way through your book, I will get the rest printed off and will come back soon to you if I have anything to say

Vag we may not be around when you come to the NE (in the middle of planning to take the ILs away that weekend for their ruby wedding anniversary), but if it doesn't happen (the actual date is still under discussion), then I will definitely come to see you while you're here

DD2  reached 6 months this week - I can't believe how quickly time is flying by. She is tucking into her food like you wouldn't believe and but BLW is proving too good at improving her pincer grip and the little madam has taken to nipping my bingo wings when I feed her. Ouch.  She's also sitting up already, but has no desire to actually move anywhere, she did roll onto her tummy once, 6 weeks or so ago, but clearly decided it wasn't all that as she hasn't attempted it since. She is destined to be a people watcher and not miss a single thing that goes on around her

Indith Sun 19-Aug-12 09:20:30

There was a little girl
Who had a little curl
Right in the middle of her forehead
And when she was good she was very very good
But when she was bad she was horrid

[Grin]

Good to see you ZJ! smile at the BLW. Ds2 is 24 weeks tomorrow and he is starting to fight for the chance to get stuck in! He is starting to sit unsupported and is getting into everything. I need to dig out the old antilop in preparation smile.

I realise I made dd's diet out to be absolutely amazing. I would like to point out she also gobbles a biscuit or something most days, manages to wrangle far too much chocolate out of her dear darling daddy by putting her pouty face on and yesterday we had hotdogs and chips for lunch grin.

You are most likely right ZJ that it is attention seeking. It has always been that way in the past. When ds1 was having a particularly bad patch dd would join in. So she is probably attention seeking. There is an element of not wanting to stop whatever she is doing too. I think I just freak out about it. Obviously I hate cleaning up the shit but I also freak out because I don't want her to have problems like ds1 and at the moment I can see her starting to withold. Probably because I have ballsed up in tryint to deal with all the smearing it everywhere. Yesterday she did 2 or 3 tiny bits in pants but the main event never came. This morning we have had a tiny bit in pants too. If she goes on too long like that then she will end up constipated. I keep telling her the poo has to come out and go to pooland etc, we are rather well rehearsed at all these stories.

What is it with my children and poo? She was absolutely fine until a few days ago. She always had some accidents I suppose, she lives with her head inteh clouds so every couple of days you'd get a couple of pairs of skidmarked pants before she went to the loo because she didn't pay attention or didn't want to interrupt her game but that is normal for a 3 year old.

See? Now I'm overthinking it and freaking out again.

Tell you what, instead of me freaking out why don't you lot go and find me a phone? You know I know nothing of smart phones and the like. I want something on 02 or that piggybacks 02 like Tesco does because that is the only one I can reliably get in my house. I don't want to pay more than £10 a month to that has to include minutes, texts and data. I want to be able to use wifi in hotspots. I want a decent camera to take photos of the kids because I never remember to take our camera with us and anyway it is so old most phone cameras are probably better. I want to be able to have a basic GPS (I assume you get apps for such things?) to go geocaching locally with the kids) since I gave up on getting a running watch due to running trying to turn me inside out. I look on the Tesco mobile site and it has phones but I have no idea about the differences between them, what opperating systems do what, what ones have the choice of apps etc. I live in the dark ages.

Indith Sun 19-Aug-12 11:07:10

Quite exciting though, yesterday at Ika we got this for the dcs for Christmas smile Managed to slip it in without them noticing! £17 between the 3 of them. Bargain grin. Means I can have a bit of fun with stockings rather than sticking to £5 each. I have the Lego ideas book for ds1 so that will go for his birthday plus a watch. Might get dd a my little pony or 2 for her birthday. Then a breathing space before ds2's birthday! Box of tissues for him?

KiwiPanda Mon 20-Aug-12 06:59:26

Oh bugger Indith I've been fighting an inexplicable urge to go to Ikea for weeks and now you post that... grin may have to visit today. I love their art stuff too (rolls of paper etc) and DD1 needs a spare duvet cover - and I'm decorating the kids rooms soon.. Hmmmmm

DD2 up at 5.30. Which is now a lie in for her. Oh joy. I spent way too much time listening to Farming Today..

Haven't yet replied to my sister but will in my own time. Also had another horrible letter (post is totally overrated) from my work. They have rejected my application to work ONE DAY a week from home. Woman who I spoke to about it (my line manager) didn't even have balls to ring me but sent the letter. That's my company - preach one thing - editorials about family flexibility and importance of supporting working mums and then they do stuff like this. It's unbelievable. Need to get out ASAP.

KiwiPanda Mon 20-Aug-12 07:01:04

Ps Indith Poundland is brilliant for sticking fillers (colouring in books, pens etc) and are you anywhere near a Tiger store because they have fantastic value stuff - prices £1/2 but looks way more classy grin

Indith Mon 20-Aug-12 09:07:19

My problem with poundland is I go round flinging things in a basket because it is only £1 and then get surprised when it adds up to £20 grin. I have heard there is a place in town doing wind up toys etc (think they have got old HAwkins stock, they are in the old Hawkins shop) at 50p each with a BOGOF offer so I need to get in without children! Need shoes too so next week when dh is off I'm going shopping.

Indith Mon 20-Aug-12 09:07:52

Shit about work sad

JamInMyWellies Mon 20-Aug-12 09:28:30

God are the holidays nearly over yet? DS2 is very whingy today and has been pants a sleeping all wkend culminating in him coming in to me at 5 yesterday drinking a pint of water then falling asleep in my bed then peeing all over me an hr later. Lovely!

Obes your holiday sounded amazing.

Indith I love that tent I do have to make an ikea trip soon that might be going in my basket.

As far as Hawkins bizarre I think they are still trading online. MIght be wrong though often am. grin

Right really need to do something about this kitchen its minging.

McKayz Mon 20-Aug-12 09:40:15

Indith, Hawkins are still trading. The York shop is still open.

I also need that tent, it's so cool!!

Indith Mon 20-Aug-12 09:44:41

Really? The York Shop is still trading? Where is it?

I thought the whole thing went bust! Did they manage to salvage some then. I love Hawkins, I was gutten when ours closed. It ahppened all of a sudden in a gone bust kind of way with piles of stock still in the shop sad

McKayz Mon 20-Aug-12 09:48:34

There are about 8 or 10 shops left. The York one is on High Ousegate, about 5 minutes from Jorvick centre. It's in the city centre.

Indith Mon 20-Aug-12 09:53:58

Ace. Thanks Kayz.

KiwiPanda Mon 20-Aug-12 09:55:38

Oh FFS. To add insult to injury, my f****ing work haven't paid me. Supposed to now be on holiday leave rather than maternity and therefore paid for the whole month. Payslip sent through post: your net pay this month : £0.00. I have a huge deposit for nursery fees coming out soon.

Indith Mon 20-Aug-12 09:58:32

Calm
Collected
Write down exactly what you will say including impressive legal type phrases you will find with help from Mr Google. Write it all down so you don't lose your train of thought.
Take deep breath
Phone
Demand to be put straight through to the boss in HR.

KiwiPanda Mon 20-Aug-12 11:42:06

Thanks Indith! wrote a very polite but slightly tinged wiht panic email to HR chap, he's apologised and is going to sort it. Clearly just your average administrative cock up. Gosh, isn't it a wonder that my esteemed company does so well financially

VagolaJahooli Mon 20-Aug-12 13:08:24

I find a polite, but slightly freaking out email works a treat, Kiwi.

Indith you are such a barer of calming wisdom. I will henceforth call you GuruIndith.

Well looks like the weather is on the cool down, we are going to the beach this afternoon but don't think we'll be going for a swim.

DS1 back to school, I sent him in with 30 dinosaur covered cup cakes to help them celebrate his birthday. I'm not sure what has happened to the sparkle clad raver of my youth, but I'm definite she has completely walked out and will never come back now. I am vagolajahooli and I bake cupcakes with dinosaurs on top....it has been 18hours since I last baked.

Indith Mon 20-Aug-12 13:21:13

grin I love the sound of dinosaur cupcakes. Did you make dinos yourself or buy toppers? Dd would love them! <<files idea away for her birthday>>

KiwiPanda Mon 20-Aug-12 13:50:23

Vag I had a moment like that this morning when I checked my email and got genuinely excited to discover a press release about a new Mike the Knight magazine. My name is Kiwi and I used I have a life ...

Indith Mon 20-Aug-12 16:36:16

Very petty considering the actual sibling problems others have but Grrrrrrrrrrr I'm a bit fuming about my sister right now.

Her fiance earns around twice what dh earns and has recently been mad a shareholder in his very good and very cool company.

He is in debt. Credit cards, overdraft etc not just his stupidly large mortgage on his teeny tiny flat.

The only reason my sister is no longer in debt is because of the inheritance we both got when my granny died.

Ok so she didn't have an easy run. She has fybro, hypermobility syndrome, IBS, endometriosis and various other things which I do understand and synmpathise with. She was unemplyed for a long time and ran up debts. Currently working but looking for part time work as she is finding it too hard to keep up with full time. I am very, very happy that she has found a great bloke who is happy to support her financially and for her to do this. I really am. I am absolutely not jealous of that I promise.

Anyway she is supposed to be sutting spending, getting rid of debt etc but honestly I can't see it and it drives me mad that we worked hard and saved and got our house etc under our own steam but she is inept with money. Even when she was earning a pittance and on her own before she was with her fiance and up to her eyeballs in debt she's be all "oh I've managed to save up £300 so £100 is savings and £200 is new ipod". She bought a £15k laptop which she recently got rid of to buy a netbook and now she has just bought an ipad.

Ok I might be a bit envy of an ipad but what pisses me off is that she goes on about cutting debt and saving for a house yet money just slips through her fingers, she is so flighty. She's been handed a deposit for a fucking house on a plate but she can't even be arsed to reign in spending. She has a smartphone and a netbook and a kindle but oh no she needed an ipad too for internet because the laptop takes too long to boot so she has the laptop for doing proper stuff (what proper stuff? She doesn't do any work at home, isn't studying, sold her super expensive SLR camera because she got bored with it so no photo stuff). If there is a gadget invented she has to have it and she has to have the latest version.

Urgh.

McKayz Mon 20-Aug-12 17:44:06

Can I ask a bf and ff question? I am going to be doing a course 1 evening a week and I am hoping to start driving lessons again. My mum will be babysitting so I will need to leave a bottle for DD. I am hoping it will just be expressed milk but if I can't get enough etc would 1 or 2 bottles of formula a week cause many problems for bf?

VagolaJahooli Mon 20-Aug-12 19:54:11

That sounds great Kayz a course. What is the course in? How old is DD now. I'm pretty sure she is well over 6 weeks so BF is established. Obviously, if you don't exclusively BF, any messing about with the feeding can mess up your supply, but messing about can be FF or expressing, as expressing doesn't stimulate your supply in the same way feeding does. However, as it is over 6 weeks, and you have a pretty good supply I don't think 1 or 2 feeds a week will be a problem. Expressing would be more desirable as she is used to digesting the BM and is more likely to accept it, but really I think it is up to you. If you did notice any changes in supply you could always up the feeds a little to build up again, it is easier to do after that magical 6 week mark. I think for only a couple of feeds a week you could easily get enough through expressing, you basically only need to express a couple of times every couple of days and you would be set for a few weeks ahead.

Indith Mon 20-Aug-12 19:57:23

Probably not. Where most people suffer with giving a bottle of formula is that they tend to do it at night so they get more sleep so they miss out on vital supply enhancing feeds. One or 2 a week shouldn't make a difference supplywise. Of course it depends on how bothered you are about her having anything that isn't bm but that could be a whole other discussion!

For the record I'm not implying giving formula is evil, I gave dd formula when I had to leave her as expressing sent us right back into oversupply problems.

You should be ok though I'd have thought. Driving lessons you might not even need to express, even for a 2 hour lesson. What do you have for expressing? I've just borrowed a Medela elctric pump and it is magic but even just hand expressing if you manage 5-10 mins each evening while watching TV then you should have enough for an evening a week. You can hand express straight into those milk storage bags and freeze so even though it might only be 2oz in each bag they add up to a full bottle.

McKayz Mon 20-Aug-12 19:58:00

She will be 9 weeks on Wednesday. It is a course in cake decorating, it's 2 hours on a Wednesday for just 6 weeks. It doesn't start until Sept 25th but with DH being away I am a bit worried about getting time to express. I could really do it now instead of cuddling DD grin

DD has had a couple of bottles before, just an ounce or so of breastmilk so I know she should take the bottle.

McKayz Mon 20-Aug-12 19:59:22

I have a tommee tippee manual pump. I'd love an electric one, seems so much easier.

Indith Mon 20-Aug-12 20:37:12

Sounds fun smile

Again though for 2 hours so long as you feed her before you go then she probably won't need it. Obviously have it if needed but I wouldn't worry about having loads. Personally I would have freezer bags with 2-3oz in each as this defrosts really fast dunked in hot water. I'd leave the milk in the freezer (or take frozen to your mums and pop in her freezer if she is having her at her house). I'd be a bit mean in the hour or so before I had to leave for the course and try to distract rather than feed then give her a good feed before leaving. Then the milk is in the freezer and will be ready within 10 mins if she needs it but can stay frozen for next time if she doesn't.

McKayz Mon 20-Aug-12 20:41:09

That sounds like the best way of doing it. A big feed and then hope she waits until I get home.

KiwiPanda Mon 20-Aug-12 21:35:12

Kayz I second what Indith said - she should be fine for 2 hours without, touch wood, and have a small amount expressed by hand just in case. Oddly though I find hand expressing way better / more efficient than electric ( I have medela swing).

KiwiPanda Mon 20-Aug-12 21:35:48

Sorry I meant small amount AT hand. Not by hand. Though it might be both wink

VagolaJahooli Mon 20-Aug-12 21:46:05

And worse comes to worst Kayz, she won't starve in just two hours. Both mine refused bottles, if they were hungry when I was around dh would offer a bottle, they would refuse andor a feed' for a feed until I returned, at which point I would be soundly told off. So they obviously can get by. The course sounds good, is this a hobby, or are you thinking of doing cake decorating as a profession? come

McKayz Mon 20-Aug-12 21:49:25

I've just managed to express 3oz. I'm quite pleased by that.

VagolaJahooli Mon 20-Aug-12 21:49:42

I was shown how to hand express and how to teach mums how to hand express but didn't have much kuck myself, though I wasn't much good at expressing any way. I usually had enough just in case, but never really used it.

VagolaJahooli Mon 20-Aug-12 21:58:17

Well done Kayz, that's loads.

McKayz Mon 20-Aug-12 22:14:10

Also is it ok if I then express more tomorrow and freeze it and then mix tonight's and tomorrow's into 1 bottle?

SummerLightning Mon 20-Aug-12 22:34:29

Hello marking my place as must come on and do catch up soon!

kayz with dd i never could be bothered to express so if I ever went out for more than a couple of hrs I just got whoever was looking after her to give a bottle of formula if necessary, was not very often but didn't have any bad effects on supply for me. Obviously would have been better to do expressed milk but i never had much luck with expressing. I think it was from about 3 months. Sounds like you are good with the expressing though!

Indith Tue 21-Aug-12 06:55:10

Great expressing smile

And yes you can mix milk. Keep it inthe fridge and then you can add bits from the day if you express more than once and freeze it together. So if you express in the morning pop that in the fridge then if you express in the evening pop that in the fridge too. When the second lot of milk has had the chance to cool mix the 2 and freeze.

When you need to make a bottle up just get however many oz you need out of the freezer, it doesn't at all matter if it is from different days.

sybilfaulty Tue 21-Aug-12 07:51:18

Fab expressing! Well done.

Don't forget, too, that BF babies don't need huge amounts. I gave mine 4 oz or so to hold them off, rather than huge 9 oz as suggested for FF babies. With dd1, I lost the ability to express at about 9 m so she had formula for the days I worked and I fed her the rest of the time. Supply was fine. If you have been exclusively bf for 9 weeks then yours will be able to miss the odd feed if expressing isn't possible, but ounds that you are going great guns with it.

We are on the Isle of Wight, which is lovely but I do wish dh would occasionally get up with the kids in am. So tired.

VagolaJahooli Tue 21-Aug-12 12:59:25

I love the IOW Sybs, DH & I cycled around it once before LOs. It has so much varied landscape for such a little island. Bit cheeky of your DH not to get up with them, are you somewhere you could stick the Tele on and go back to bed or are you camping. When on holidays it is definitely turn taking on sleep ins. He isn't playing fair at all.

Kayz I was thinking your going to all this trouble to have feeds sorted for what amounts to only a couple of hours a week, if she goes well on either expressed or FF maybe you should go out for the whole night, your mum is there anyway. Maybe you could go to your course then meet a friend afterwards for a drink & a chat. I think because your doing all this alone so much you deserve it.

Vag has good advice there Kayz - you are amazing doing what you do with so little help for large periods of time. And congrats on the BF, it's really, really great smile.

Syb, that is really not on for your DH not to get up for the kids. How does he justify it?

T is being a proper, 24 carat shit at the moment. DP and I are completely sharing childcare, and yet T spends his time telling DP he hates him, just wants me, etc. It's making DP so depressed. He took him on a special outing to London the other week - they apparently had a great time, went to the Tate, Diana playground, on a boat, Nat Hist museum, etc. All T could say the next day was that he'd preferred being at his granny's the weekend before.

I know the advice is to make as little of it as possible (which I am doing now, after initially getting really angry and punishing him for being so unkind). I know a lot of 3 year olds do it, and it's a phase and he'll grow out of it. But DP is so down at the moment, he doesn't have any work to raise his self esteem elsewhere (he's frantically applying for stuff), and this opportunity to spend time with the kids that everyone says they're so jealous of and he must be so grateful for, is marred by the fact that one of them keeps telling him he doesn't want to be there. DP says he dreads getting up in the morning with them (we take it in turns to get up with them) as he knows T will scream for a good 20 mins that it's not me. sad.

I'm so angry with him, I want to tell him that he's so lucky to have a dad who not only wants to be involved with his upbringing, but can. I want to tell him to make the most of it as he won't always be this available - or this willing,if he carries on like this. But f course there's no point as he's only 3 and thinks he's the centre of the universe. I just feel so sad for DP who is pretty depressed anyway, and this is just making it worse.

Sorry for that little rant, just needed to get it off my chest and see if any of you have any advice on what to do?

SummerLightning Tue 21-Aug-12 15:29:40

Oh spot ds does the same to me. It's getting on my nerves now and actually makes me not want to spend time with him. It's all " I LOVE daddy but I don't like YOU!". And dh is quite smug about it as well which fucks me off.

JamInMyWellies Tue 21-Aug-12 18:24:59

Spot same here. Mummy I am in luff with you, Mummy I am not in luff with Daddy. DH tries to give him a cuddle in the morning and all he gets is go away Daddy I am cuddling mummy.

VagolaJahooli Tue 21-Aug-12 20:21:56

Fuck me Spot, your DP did all that in one day, wow what an amazing dad, I manage maybe one of those things in a day out and feel shattered and end up needing loads of coffee and treats.

Didn't MrWG have this issue a while back. What did they do? I do feel for him, must really hurt. Maybe T knows that it gets him attention.

LadyThompson Tue 21-Aug-12 21:41:12

I am soooooooo behiiiiiiind but just wanted to say to Spot - DD1 patently prefers me and DP finds it very hurtful. Very very difficult. What a shame that your DP arranged such a lovely day And T was a bit meh about it all, how demoralising. Kids are SO annoying sometimes. Could you try bigging your DP up and talking about him a lot when he's not around?

Ladies, I am not ignoring you and I even have my notes. I just haven't got a handle on my life at the moment - not enough hours in the day. Or not enough days in the week, more like grin

JamInMyWellies Wed 22-Aug-12 12:05:52

Is it wrong to want to tell the speech therapist off for not pronouncing DS2s name correctly. It is making me irrationally angry.

Rubena Wed 22-Aug-12 12:13:13

Hi ladies just a brief hi and greetings from Australia! Last min plans came together and although exhausting trip over my brothers reaction to our surprise appearance was worth every minute of the hellish flights! The DCs shattered and jet lagged mean worse than ever mummy clingyness and it's draining, to say the very very least!
Anyway just a quick one to say hi to all and prob no chance of a catch up but will try !