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Getting out and about

(25 Posts)
firsttimemum15 Wed 20-Jan-16 14:46:37

Looking for some reassurance. I have a new born and getting out the house seems impossible at the moment. Can anyone relate?

I haven't ever planned to go far but little one either wants to feed and I am also pumping to increaae milk supply. See other thread.

I hope this is normal

RNBrie Wed 20-Jan-16 14:52:29

Totally normal. But also totally something you can overcome if you need to.

If you are happy hunkering down at home then you just go ahead, there are no rights or wrongs.

If you feel the need to get out and about then my tips would be to always restock your change bag the night before. Then plan to go out as soon as you've fed the baby even if you're not feeding on a schedule. Get everything you need together, even put your shoes on, feed baby then go straight out.

If you're really struggling and depending on the age of your baby, a routine can really help. But it's not necessary unless you're unhappy with how things are at the moment.

Generally the newborn bit passes really fast so if you're happy then embrace it!

firsttimemum15 Wed 20-Jan-16 19:25:43

I am embracing it. I get ready to go out hen she was to to feed which is fine. But feeding takes a while and I'm having to pump too.

I've adjusted my expectations to staying in for the mo. Fresh air would be nice but it's important for me to establish BF to increase supply. I don't want to feed to a schedule. X

broodylicious Sun 31-Jan-16 06:55:42

Yes, totally normal firsttime. It's a nerve wracking thing going out the first few times but definitely would encourage you to take a walk round the block so both you and lo get some fresh air. Even if it's just ten minutes.
Do you pump straight after a feed? Is there much left after lo has fed? Just thinking of how to get most milk for you to free up your time.

sianihedgehog Sun 31-Jan-16 07:16:36

Totally normal. It'll gradually get better without you noticing, until it seems like no problem at all.

firsttimemum15 Sun 31-Jan-16 07:25:18

I've reduced pumping and have started doing it once a day 8n the morning. One midwife suggested at the end of feeds but it's impractical to do after every feed. So I may 8ntroduce that if I can on a basis of only doing it when I can

magpie17 Sun 31-Jan-16 07:56:33

Totally normal, I had to pump every two hours (supply problems) and it was exhausting just doing that and feeding and looking after the baby! Getting out for a walk was a bit lower down on the priority list. We did get out every few days, even just down to the park and back or round the block, you can get a bit stir crazy otherwise. I remember at about two weeks I walked to the supermarket, about twenty minutes away, and was so nervous he would need fed, changed, my boobs would leak etc etc etc! Now I walk miles a day (no car) and never give it another thought, you will get there!

My DS is six months now and we are out loads, we do groups/classes nearly every day, go to see relatives, go to parkrun, swimming, shopping, you name it! We've been doing that since about three months and it seemed impossible to imagine that at three weeks! Once you get into a routine and know what you need to take it gets easier.

Give yourself time, don't put pressure on yourself and don't get stressed trying to get out. If it's stressful, then try again tomorrow. I found it helped to go and sit in the garden with DS just for ten minutes, even if we were in our pyjamas!

firsttimemum15 Sun 31-Jan-16 10:29:03

I have thought of sitting in the garden but the whether is gross. We have got out a bit she's been quite settled when I have got out apart from.one time. At the moment I'm worried about feeding when out but only because it takes aaaggggeees.

Your situation sounds like.mine I had supply issues. I love walking but how do you feed in the great outdoors?

broodylicious Sun 31-Jan-16 22:31:15

Yeah it's been awful weather wise hasn't it? We've hardly managed to get out either. Hopefully there'll be better days ahead soon.
I used to dread going out with dd1 because of the fear of bfing in public. I used to think she'd be distracted or my boob would spray everywhere or flop out unintentionally or someone would ask me to stop doing it (none of these things happened). However, I used to get into a little routine to help me settle into it - driving into the city or out of town shopping park, parking, walking to john Lewis (very baby friendly at every store I've visited), going to cafe, getting a drink, feeding then little walk around and back home again in time for next feed/wake up. If I broke it down into tiny successes (ie getting into town, parking, walking to JL etc), I was ok. Sounds so crazy but it helped me a lot in the early days with her. I'd go when I knew it wouldn't be too busy as well, so about 10am weekday. Since then, I've fed her and her baby sister everywhere and anywhere necessary - park bench, supermarket, cafés, restaurants, pubs, swimming poolside... I don't bother with the cover up cloths because I personally felt they draw more attention to the situation, I just hoik up my top and get going.

firsttimemum15 Sun 31-Jan-16 23:36:14

I'm not worried about the public.

I'm worried about the length of time it takes. Tonight for example she seemed fast asleep. Put her down at 9.30 awake by 10 and constant feeding since.

People say growth spurt etc but it feels like each feed is like this. I haven't managed to get her to nap all day just condos t feeding feeding feeding. Tongue tie has been done. I had low supply so now I'm concerned those issues have crept back in.

Well meaning family members say give a bottle (of expressed milk) but all other advice and articles I've read contradict this and state that getting baby on the boob will stimulate supply etc.giving a bottle will decrease supply. After everything I've been through to increase supply I do t want to go down that route

firsttimemum15 Sun 31-Jan-16 23:46:00

PS we don't have a routine yet so that is a bit tricky. Don't get me wrong we have been out a bit I just can't imagine getting to the stage you're at. I feel ready to throw the towel in.

broodylicious Mon 01-Feb-16 03:46:23

The first few months are so tough going. With my first, I really struggled - her latch was not good and she butchered my nips - but it becomes easier with time. Honest. It does. One day, things will just click.

How old is your lo? Don't worry about not having a routine, plenty if time for that. If you don't want to give a bottle then smile and nod at your relatives and freeze your milk to use another day.

firsttimemum15 Mon 01-Feb-16 04:02:22

Yes that's what I've been doing but constant feeding is making me question whether things are ok.

I find the uncertainty the most frustrating thing. X

deuscat Mon 01-Feb-16 04:30:37

How old is your newborn? They have very predictable growth spurts when they feed endlessly in order to build your supply but it makes most mum fear their supply is worsening. It honestly gets easier with time. By the time you've hit 2-3 months it will be a breeze in comparison to constant newborn feeding. I remember it very well!

firsttimemum15 Mon 01-Feb-16 04:51:57

So is constsnt nursig normal then outside of growth spurts?

We think she had a 2, 3 and 4 week spurt. She's just over 4 weeks now.

I think I'd cope a.lot better if I knew she would sleep in her own space at the end of it but I can't get her to at the moment..

magpie17 Mon 01-Feb-16 08:50:37

4 weeks is such a short time. I know it feels like forever now but things really do change very quickly. It was a good 6-8 weeks before I felt normal and able to get on with things like going out and shopping etc.

I can't help with the breastfeeding side of things. My DS was a breast refuser, he never ever latched on once, so I was stuck permanently expressing. My supply never properly got established as a result and I threw in the towel at 6 weeks and went on to formula. I do know, though, that what you're describing is normal with BFing. The first weeks are very very tough but stick with it (as long as it's what you want) and you will have much more freedom with breastfeeding than bottle feeding in terms of feeding when out. Bottle feeding was right for us, but can be a faff making sure you've got enough food when your out and if unexpected things happen you need to be prepared. With boobs you are good to go when and where you like!

Honestly, you are doing great. It will get better soon.

firsttimemum15 Mon 01-Feb-16 09:42:51

I know I keep reminding myself she's tiny. I'm trying to have a baby moon and enjoy it but due to.supply issues I start to work der whether she's getting enough and whether I should start pumping more again to.increase supply.

People on here have said I'm. Anxious. I'm. Not I jusy wsnt the best for her. I enjoy snuggling and feeding most of the time. X

sianihedgehog Mon 01-Feb-16 10:00:51

My little boy will still fall asleep sucking and keep sucking all night long at 5.5 months! As a newborn he really did feed constantly. He'd very occasionally come off the breast with a lovely milk drunk face, but mostly he just fell asleep sucking. And I know I have no supply issues as he's growing ASTOUNDINGLY well. He's gone up several centiles. He just likes to suck.

I wasn't able to express much at all when he was newborn, so I could have really worried, but expressing is no indication of how much milk the baby gets, and nothing stimulates supply better than baby sucking. The best indicators that everything is okay are plenty of wet and dirty nappies, and a baby that's gaining weight.

If you are really concerned, ring your health visitor - they can often send round a breastfeeding support person to have a look at latch and stuff, and that might reassure you.

magpie17 Mon 01-Feb-16 10:52:19

You're not being overly anxious at all, you're being a good mum!! Honestly you are. The constant feeding has got to be one of the toughest things but she is going to be upping your supply with every suck. I think the baby moon thing is the best - go to bed, stick on a box set and just feed for few days. It will be exhausting but forget about cleaning, going out and whatever, get your partner to make you a packed lunch (if he's working) and stay snuggled.

You are doing all the right and normal things and it will get easier.

deuscat Mon 01-Feb-16 18:44:05

Not all newborns spend all their time on the boob but mine certainly did! It was exhausting but so worth it because once BF was established it was just so simple. My DS is 13 months and he still BF to sleep at night and for naps. He doesn't unlatch usually, so I have to do it when I can see he is asleep. I didn't do that when he was newborn though because the suckling helps supply.

You're doing fantastically by the sounds of it!

firsttimemum15 Mon 01-Feb-16 21:56:28

Yes I've asked him to make packed lunches and I do like staying snuggled and enjoying this time.

It's the witching hour that's hard.

Ok I dint have a tv in bedroom. Wish I did. But I've got an ipad any good boxes

I'd like to watch Cold Feet again
Not into gritty crime thriller hose of cards trendy stuff or that thing everyone raved about with the character called Walter white.

Any recommendations?

Thanks for the kind words ladies

Fugghetaboutit Tue 02-Feb-16 05:13:39

My dd is nearly 4 weeks. She feeds constantly at home but when in buggy/car seat she sleeps the whole time when out.

I took my toddler and her to the park the other day and fed her right before putting her coat on. She didn't wake until 2 hours later when we came home because of the movement in the car then buggy.

broodylicious Mon 08-Feb-16 09:30:06

How are things going now first? Xx

firsttimemum15 Mon 08-Feb-16 11:49:49

Hi

We got some air yesterday. I have some things to do this week so here's hoping.

Had approx a 10hr cluster feed on sat. Exhausting.

I think it's the unpredictability that's hard but I'm trying to be led by my baby.

It's so nice of you to ask.

Thanks so much

caroline1972 Fri 26-Feb-16 21:24:57

It does get easier - try going somewhere baby friendly first so it doesn't matter if your little one is screaming (and you are too LOL!)

What about an NCT postnatal course?

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