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November 2012 - The first fearless steps and the rest of us hoping our babies remain stationary for a bit longer

(1000 Posts)
StuntNun Sat 07-Sep-13 08:25:10
daisychain76 Fri 13-Sep-13 23:19:29

Evening. Glad you saw a good MW today gt. I havr been thinking a lot about when l was in hospital having H this week (yesterday it was a year since l got takeen in with pre~eclampsia. The MWs made all the difference to me. With the consultaants l felt very anonymous and a bit powerless.

Glad to hear F is getting better bp.

That‘s great nnews stunt and madam that much sleep sounds like bliss.

Got to leave the house at 6.30am tomorrow and won‘t be back til 9pm (compulsory training course for work). Never left H that long so dreading it.

Got H‘s main Christmas prresent in Sainsburys today. A really big megablocks dumper truck with the blocks in it. Reduced from £30 to £20 and l can justt see him pushing it round and trying to ride in it. Babies are so much easier to buy for than 9 year olds!

Lily311 Fri 13-Sep-13 23:32:00

Sore throat, period and insomnia. I can deal with those but not at the same time.

GTbaby Sat 14-Sep-13 00:14:37

Love the landlord rants ginger.

Think I want to name change soon. My name is so boring.

GTbaby Sat 14-Sep-13 00:15:04

Lily that sucks x

wellieboots Sat 14-Sep-13 02:18:44

lily that sounds horrid, hope you get to sleep soon.
gt I am so smile that you had a better appt with someone sensible and feel supported. Sending you labour vibes for the right time.
Thanks to everyone who has asked after us - we are doing great most of the time (last night we had a bad night of 5 wakeups one of which was 1.5 hours, separation anxiety?). Teething gel and calpol didn't do anything sad poor bubba.
peaches loving the ebay username story and glad LO settling a bit better at creche.

But other than that DD has been sleeping pretty well for a couple of weeks now which has contributed to my improving state of mind. Bit stressed about trip back to the UK but looking forward to it as well. Things with DH are OK - we are communicating better, got some relationship counselling, need to do some more but having probs arranging childcare for it. My CBT has finished now and I was a bit worried about coping after that, but OK so far. I'm still bfing but now that she has cut down to usually 2, sometimes 1, feed during the day, I'm much happier and feel less trapped. I'm happy to keep doing morning and bedtime for a while longer, so maybe I can just get her to take cows milk during the day from 1 [hopeful] and then that would be much easier.

So, dreading the flight but looking forward to the trip itself. Slight issue in that my DM appears to not be talking at the moment, which could be a bit awkward, and not sure if I mentioned but FIL retired a month or so ago and so PILs are currently in Europe on a long trip and will be in London same time as us when we first arrive. Could be very interesting, they will probably see more of A than they ever have [hmmm]

Pikz Sat 14-Sep-13 04:52:48

Trying to remember loads whilst LO still asleep at 7.50!!! Local time.

Stunt I have the biggest grin hope last night was as good for J.

Hope little piglet is on the mend

Hope you kicked dps arse PP

Pass I want that kid too!!

GT glad the mw was better and you feel reassured.

Pikz Sat 14-Sep-13 04:53:27

Welles glad you are good and the uk will be great!

StuntNun Sat 14-Sep-13 05:49:00

It wasn't a one off, we had 8:30 - 5:20 last night. grin I'm not sure I can claim credit as I suspect we have naturally come to the end of a sleep regression that coincides with the sleep training but I can post what we've done with J if anyone thinks it would be helpful.

PurplePidjin Sat 14-Sep-13 06:01:40

GT that's much better smile

Wellie it's lovely to hear you sounding so much more positive

6:45-

<drumroll please>

5:30! shock

PurplePidjin Sat 14-Sep-13 06:02:58

X post, Stunt grin Izzy's turn next!

Pikz Sat 14-Sep-13 06:35:17

Wow J and R!!!! Fab work.

Stunt I would love to know what you have done. If this isn't regression think I shall have to sleep train when we get home

Lily311 Sat 14-Sep-13 06:43:12

stunt I am so so happy for you.pidj and for you too!!! Can I actually ask your advise? O is in pocket nappies and the last week or so her wee volume increased. I only used one microfibre booster per nappy, last week used two but the nappies still leaked after 2 hours. I have a couple of bamboo boosters, should I use one bamboo+one microfibre? I will need to buy more bamboo boosters though. Or is there any other solution?

I think I haven't slept all night. I wonder what the cause is for my recent sleep troubles.

I feel horrendous, no voice, sore throat, full of snot. I'm so going to have the flu jab in October. I asked a cleaning lady to come and help me today, my dishwasher got fixed! Just waiting for plumber to install it, I actually can't believe that I redesign the bottom half of the cupboards just for a dishwasher. But so worth it.

PurplePidjin Sat 14-Sep-13 06:55:08

I would use one mf with one or even 2 bamboo, with the mf nearest her skin. Bamboo holds more liquid but doesn't absorb it as fast as mf. R has mf, bamboo and hemp in his - boys pee like a hose hmm

ChasingDaisy Sat 14-Sep-13 06:59:28

Yay for stunt and pidj! I am SO happy for you both grin

Well, I am shattered. Only got a few hours sleep. O slept 7-6 but I was too excited to sleep...

...me and one of my best childhood friends went to loads of pop concerts when we were teenagers. We were proper kids of the '90s. So The Big Reunion programme on ITV2 is my idea of heaven. Anyway, I wanted to get tickets for the tour this summer but they had sold out sad. But I just found out that they are doing a Christmas tour so I have just booked tickets grin. Me and my friend who I haven't seen for 10 years are off to relive our youth and be 15 again grin. I am ridiculously excited and spent last night listening to 5ive, 911 and Blue songs on youtube!

StuntNun Sat 14-Sep-13 07:31:17

The J guide to sleep training the chronically unsleeping baby

First make sure there is no underlying health issue. Until the reflux and egg intolerance were properly medicated / avoided, J was waking in the night in abdominal pain so all we could do was comfort him until it passed. More recently however his symptoms were pretty well under control but his sleep was still poor. That awake for an hour or two in the night thing seems to be a common occurrence at 9-10 months so must be another regression.

Fix daytime naps - we started doing 'nap by any means possible' so in the sling, pram, cot, car, in bed with me. Anything so long as you have two long (very approximately an hour) naps a day. Naps after 4 or 5 p.m. and very short naps should be avoided. If J gets a ten minute sleep it seems to reset his sleepy clock and he then won't be able to go to sleep for another couple of hours even if he's tired. IMO daytime naps and nighttime sleep feed off each other so they are both equally important.

Where we were going wrong - not having a reasonably regular schedule of feed and nap times, I was feeding to sleep, DH was rocking to sleep and we were relying on the dummy to get and keep him asleep.

Where we were going right - prioritising naps, having a strong bedtime routine and a set bedtime.

What we changed - stopped the dummies at nighttime, changed the bedtime routine to stop feeding to sleep, moved the bedtime story to the cot, started controlled crying. We also moved his bedtime to a bit later to be certain that he would be sleepy enough to want to sleep. Over time we will move it earlier 15 minutes at a time but I want to see if it's working before I change anything else.

What we do now - try and make sure he had two naps of about an hour long in the day (9:30 and 12:30). If he doesn't get these or sleeps later in the day then I will lower my expectations for that night, e.g. put him to bed later, expect more awakenings, longer crying, etc.

Bedtime routine - bath (if he has one), PJs, feed somewhere light and/or noisy so he doesn't fall asleep, brush teeth, into sleeping bag, into cot, read Winnie-the-Pooh, kiss goodnight, lights out and leave the room. He protests at being put in the cot, calms when he sees the big red Winnie-the-Pooh book, and cries when left however he hasn't actually cried for longer than 2.5 minutes so we haven't had to do the 15 second 'check and console' recommended for controlled crying. He always goes to sleep on his tummy. I find the video monitor is invaluable as you can see he's tossing and turning to get comfy but not actually sitting up or standing in distress.

Nighttime awakenings - before 4 a.m. wait five minutes to see of he goes back to sleep, then do 'check and console' every ten minutes until he goes back to sleep. After 4 a.m. being him into bed for a feed then either return him to his cot or keep him in bed until morning depending on the time and whether DH is away.

It's only been four nights so far but there has been a dramatic improvement in night sleep but also he's more able to self settle for his naps. I still have the 'nap by any means' policy but I have managed to put him down awake for a couple of naps and he has gone to sleep with the minimum of fuss.

I hope this helps anyone else with sleep issues. We have done controlled crying with all three DSs but I would say that the time has to be right, your child needs to be prepared for it and be secure and pain-free for it to work properly.

I used the Troublesome Tots website for advice and to pinpoint where I was going wrong.

BigPigLittlePig Sat 14-Sep-13 08:16:53

Woohoo to stunt and pidj!

On the subject of sleep, dsd is still sparko. Normally she's a 6am kinda gal so am a bit confused....don't want to waker her though if she's still tired.

Woohoo stunt and pidj!

Awesome bargain detective Loving your present buying! I've got one thing so far, seen some things on book people and in ikea but probably won't get much. What you getting from Ikea?

Def worth more than. €1 peaches

Sorry to all the poorly babies. M has a combination of a cold and teething so is v snotty and dribbly, sore bum and a bit grumpy, especially as she refused to nap all day yesterday.

Haven't been on much, had a bit of a mare this week and sometimes don't feel there's much I can contribute. But I am reading and enjoy hearing everyone else's stories.

We're off away for the weekend, staying in a hotel tonight, fingers crossed M isn't grumpy tonight

GingerBeerAndTinnedPeaches Sat 14-Sep-13 08:44:17

Fab news stunt and pidj that's brilliant smile

daisychain76 Sat 14-Sep-13 08:59:08

Great news stunt and pidg. Thanks for writing it all down stunt. I am getting to the point l need to night wean H and get some better sleep, so l am going to be studying your post carefully smile

Loving the pr username history.

chasing I think he has a right to see where O lives. If that is his reason for asking then I would let him come over to pick O up one day, have someone else there with you and make it a very short in and out visit. If however you feel he has alterior motives then say no.

stunt we had the most awful night ever last night and something has to be done. I will be checking out that website thanks. So pleased for you it wasn't a one off and things are on the up.

BigPigLittlePig Sat 14-Sep-13 10:54:26

Nap by any means includes lovely cuddles on the sofa with mummy, yes?

Lily311 Sat 14-Sep-13 11:06:05

chasing yes, I would let him visit. But as others said only if you have someone else in and the visit would not take longer than 5 min.

My cousin is in labour. They are having a boy. I can't wait for newborn cuddles.

BigPigLittlePig Sat 14-Sep-13 11:36:20

I think F has been taking notes from dets O. I was attempting to changing her nappy earlier on, when she proceeded to kick her heels into the poo, then flip onto her tummy and scuttle off. Pooey bottom wiggling along, pooey heels dragging at the floor hmm Thanks baby!

GingerBeerAndTinnedPeaches Sat 14-Sep-13 11:37:45

grin pig I love how you described that.

MissMummy1 Sat 14-Sep-13 12:09:28

Hi everyone, sorry I haven't posted for a few days. Been reading bits and pieces but not had 2 mins to myself! So here goes for a big catch up (and a quiche-fish-slap worth wobble..)

Utterly fab news on some sleep stunt - long may it continue!!

PR I don't really know what to say about the shouty incident. I am glad they handled it well but it would leave me seriously questioning things. Having done a placement (very briefly) in a (very poor) private nursery, I have big hang ups about other people looking after M.

Apple I can't imagine how hard that must be for all concerned. I went to school with a boy with Iranian family and he always waxed lyrical about what an utterly beautiful place it was. I never believed him until I saw his recent FB pics from a trip there. Breathtakingly stunning. I hope one day you can all go.

Chasing everyone has already said what I am thinking, but my response would be no. It is your space. When I moved into my own flat after separating from an ex, it was horrible having him be in it when he was visiting my new flatmate. Entirely different circumstances - we never lived together, he wasn't violent and our split was entirely amicable read my doing but yet I still couldn't cope with having him in my 'new life space'. Anyway, what I am saying is your flat is your space and there is absolutely no reason why he needs to be there.

Pass were you at ffirs? attempts deliberate vagueness and fails miserably Frog girl sounds adorable and reminds me of a pupil I had do something very similar on an outward bounds trip!

Having just watched Matilda falling asleep while trying to remove the dog's ears, I very much doubt she will be a frog saver blush I can but hope though!

GT glad you had a nice MW. You will know. I knew for all fucking 30 hours of it. Hmmph.

Hahaha PR I loved reading your blog. I have had some utterly ghastly landlords. I used to come home regularly to find my last one sitting in my apartment, drinking my tea and sifting through my things. She ended up being prosecuted for fraud, criminal damage and harassment. And has since had the flat repossessed. When I moved in I had originally planned to rent it for 6 months and then make her an offer (20k above what it is up for now). Ce'est la ve, I now have a dog and a baby so my days of swanky, top floor apartments are long gone. And it had a dodgy electric heating system that cost more to run than my 4 bed detached house.. Anyway, here it is - hasn't changed much. sad

Hugs lily

Wellies your post the other day, made my day!

Bargainous deal finding detective. You sound like my kind of person!! I have bought M a trike, duplo, a scuba diver fuzzy felts book, an IKEA hobby horse goat thing (totally ridiculous), a scots version of the gruffalo and some musical instruments. These will be split between xmas and birthday. I have a few other bits and pieces to get as stocking fillers and would love a wooden abacus for her. I am eyeing this up for her but cannot justify it this year so may buy it for her 2nd birthday.

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