If, let's say, Jesus was born in 2013 instead of then...what would happen?

(43 Posts)
skratta Sat 06-Apr-13 16:24:24

So.

Jesus becomes mildly famous in the loal area for I don't know, healing people or something, and saying e is the son of God.

Would you believe him and be a disciple?

And if you HAD been born when you believe when Jesus was alive...would you have been brave enough to a)believe in him and b)follow him?

I'm an atheist btw, born Jewish b converted, and DH is a Hindu so I dont believe in Jesus/Christiniaty but what about Christians?

EllieArroway Sat 06-Apr-13 18:22:50

We know what would happen - everyone would ignore him and he'd be known as the local nutter.

People quite frequently show up all over the place claiming to be the son of God and/or pretending they can heal people. No one sensible ever believes them - and when their healing claims are looked into, it turns out to be total bull.

The only reason people believed back in 1st century Palestine is because it was a monumentally superstitious time - people believed in the gods and omens to a degree that it's very difficult for us to comprehend today. Even the straightforward histories from sensible writers like Seutonius contain references to supernatural stuff.

Even the most woo-saturated person today is less superstitious than the most rational people back then. It really was a different time so it's difficult to compare.

Of course - if someone showed up who could walk on water, raise the dead and turn water in to wine and could demonstrate that to the satisfaction of scientists, then that would be a different matter.

Still wouldn't prove God, of course - someone with such gifts could be an alien from an advanced civilization - but I think it would be sufficienly interesting that most of us would take notice.

ivykaty44 Sat 06-Apr-13 18:27:07

what would happen now

well the Daily Mail would attack him first and then keep attacking him for all it was worth

David Cameron would tax him if he was poor

George Osbourne would call him a benefit cheat

The public would blame him for the banking crisis

Pan Sat 06-Apr-13 18:48:08

I don't think Jesus ever said he was the Son of God. I think that was handed to him later, by others, iirc.

But yes to all ivy said.

And would Moses, or Mohammed have faired any better?

WallyBantersJunkBox Sat 06-Apr-13 18:54:12

He was a carpenter, why would he be a benefit cheat? He'd be self employed and have to buy his own stamp and get a tax accountant.

He'd spend his spare time laying laminate floors and ramps for disabled access in community centres, and fixing deadbolts and secondary glazing for nice old ladies.

He'd turn down the job offer of an extension to the local casino, and give them a piece of his mind into the bargain.

I think he'd just live among us as a nice guy and volunteer, and give community centre talks about neighborhood watch schemes, and school talks about bullying.

WallyBantersJunkBox Sat 06-Apr-13 18:55:46

I'd "like" him on Facebook. Does that make me a disciple?

ivykaty44 Sat 06-Apr-13 19:14:03

Lots of self employed people claim Tax credits Wally

LynetteScavo Sat 06-Apr-13 19:20:47

I see a lot of similarities between Jesus and Darren Brown.

I'm not so sure about the laminate floor. Its not very environmentally friendly.

seeker Sat 06-Apr-13 19:23:31

"I don't think Jesus ever said he was the Son of God. I think that was handed to him later, by others, iirc."

He did say "know ye not I must be about my Father's business?"

seeker Sat 06-Apr-13 19:24:42

Sorry about the "ye"- I am very old and King James-y.

I sometimes think of this question. Did anyone watch the second coming with Christopher ecclestone? I hope I would believe someone that honest. ...but there are people who have strange claims......then I think how dreadful to be totally honest about something and nobody listens and they murder you. Horrible.

WallyBantersJunkBox Sat 06-Apr-13 19:38:07

Laminate flooring can be very ecofriendly, due to the longevity of the product and the fact that it can be made of compressed recycled materials. I live in an Eco friendly house and it's completely laminated.

I doubt Jesus would claim benefits, but perhaps volunteer at CAB telling people what they are entitled to.

hiddenhome Sat 06-Apr-13 20:24:39

He would be diagnosed as being mentally ill and made to accept monthly depot injections and have a well meaning, but overworked Community Psychiatric Nurse round to his house to make sure he was safe talk about his feelings hmm Everyone would laugh shun him and he'd end up isolated and probably drink too much wine.

If he went to the local church, he'd probably be rejected encouraged to leave (CofE) - told to sit down and be quiet (Catholic) or be regarded as a benign nutter (Methodist).

It would be exactly the same as back then - just like then he would be mocked and ridiculed and depending on where he lived he would be killed.

We are actually much more superstitious now apparently than back then - I actually only know this as I've just finished reading a book on superstitions grin given what they knew at the time scientifically it completely beggars belief that in our scientific age we have so much superstition

nightlurker Sat 06-Apr-13 20:35:57

His followers would be very excited about him, and their enthusiasm, confidence, and devotion could end up in people being afraid of them. Most churches would be offended and fight against him because he'd declare himself as the way. The reactions could vary from people calling followers crazy and mocking them to people taking violent action against them because they fear their loyalty to their leader. It's possible he would be imprisoned on false charges (after all, if you think he's a liar and deceiving the people, what's the harm, you're doing the world a favor by giving people a reason not to believe).

It's also entirely possible that it would go without being noticed, or that the world would follow him. However, given the track record of the prophets, more often than not they were outcast and ridiculed.

I don't know what I would have done. I certainly wouldn't have been pointing the finger at him or pushing for his execution. I would have looked at what he had to say and considered it, then prayed about it.

ImTooHecsyForYourParty Sat 06-Apr-13 20:36:55

He would be diagnosed with schizophrenia, put on anti-psychotics and probably sectioned.

LeeCoakley Sat 06-Apr-13 20:37:26

I wouldn't believe him. I'd just assume it was his way of conning a window table for 13 at The Star of India every Saturday night.

He would be mistaken as Frank Gallagher by the local drunks smilegrin

.....and the local drunks (and me) would be happy to have him as a friend as he can turn water into wine grin

LOLat LeeCoakley re the table for 13 !!

qo Sat 06-Apr-13 20:46:36

What a great thread! Despite being interested, I have nothing to add - except that he'd probably listen to the stone roses

AnAirOfHope Sat 06-Apr-13 20:56:59

If i could not prove him a fake i would be a follower. Im an opptamist and belive in goodness, i would want to help people.

infamouspoo Sat 06-Apr-13 20:59:19

if he showed up in the US they'd call him a pinko commie liberal grin

If Jesus showed up for the first time now there would be no churches to approve or disapprove of him. I like the idea of Jesus putting in laminate flooring but my guess is he would work in an office as a lot of people do these days. Yet I do think ge would do something creative, having created the universe and all, so I am guessing designer and maybe designing packag etc.

Then one day ge would get really angry at some evil product packaging and would turn over the printers! Would I follow him now, hope so, expect so. Would I have followed him if I had been around at the time if his arrival on earth? Hope so, expect do. I am a follower now so I would imagine if I heard about him them I would have.

Booyhoo Sat 06-Apr-13 22:37:12

he'd get his face on the DM front page for a day. be interviewed on this morning. some would buy into him. most would ignore him i imagine.

Great idea for a these. seeker Jesus did say if you have seen me you have seen the father, not a direct quote, will find it if I can.

Annunziata Sat 06-Apr-13 22:38:41

Obviously he'd be Italian, because his mamma thinks he's the Son of God and he think she's a virgin grin

I'm going to Hell, but that joke makes me laugh blush

seeker it's John 14.10 if you are interested you can Google it. I can't and paste easily on my phone, apologies.

seeker Sun 07-Apr-13 10:42:48

I know, Italian. The devil can quote scripture........grin

MortifiedAdams Sun 07-Apr-13 10:47:05

He would tweet his sermons

The last supper would be at an all you can eat buffet and theyd be thrown out after the two hour time slot

He would have a live stream webcam on the grave / cave www.willheressurect.com

Mary would have given birth at the local hospital, had an epidural and forceps and would have had to fight off the Bounty Lady.

Trills Sun 07-Apr-13 10:47:36

He would have been bullied at school for being odd.

Tortington Sun 07-Apr-13 10:48:55

ImTooHecsyForYourParty Sat 06-Apr-13 20:36:55

He would be diagnosed with schizophrenia, put on anti-psychotics and probably sectioned

this is what would happen in reality, i agree

Phew seeker I didn't quote I referenced! (Wink)

I kind of agree trills he might have been bullied but I also think he might have tried to combat the bullies, just as he took on the spiritual bullies of his day.

Trills Sun 07-Apr-13 11:05:33

Yes he'd try.

But the teachers wouldn't like him very much (because he'd tell them that they were wrong about things).

So I don't think he'd have a very nice school experience.

madhairday Tue 09-Apr-13 17:28:59

V interesting thread!

snort @ Daily Fail/Cameron/Osborne's view of Jesus as a useless member of society.

IDS might like him because it would mean thousands of people could come off DLA because they get healed.

But then he'd hate him because J would stand up for all those who get thrown off by ATOS and are still ill, and would campaign for them and get cross.

I hope I'd follow him. I think we are much more sceptical now, and think of anyone who makes such claims as Jesus did as being a bit of a nutter. One more reason that the first century AD was the best time strategically grin

madhairday like the logic! But if you follow him now having not physically met him am pretty sure you would follow him now if you did (as would I, I really hope). smile

ReallyTired Wed 10-Apr-13 22:52:35

This thread is brilliant.

I imagine that jesus would go the sink comprehensive roughest school in town. A mircle would happen and the kids would actually pass their exams.

DiscoDonkey Wed 10-Apr-13 22:55:21

Laminate shock

DiscoDonkey Wed 10-Apr-13 22:57:01

Easter eggs wouldn't exist yet shock shock

He would be my beat friend! Turning water into wine? I'd be a Jesus Groupie!

DiscoDonkey Wed 10-Apr-13 22:59:17

Although hopefully the price of fish would come down

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