I'm trying to make sense of a lot of things that don't make much sense at the moment, so apologies for the long and rambling nature of this post 😳.
Background: I was brought up in a very church-going household (unhealthily so, IMHO, church ranking above all else). At the age of 10 I began to feel very clearly that there was no such thing as God. I was forced to go to church though until I 'grew out of' thinking like that. At 16 I refused point blank to go and have barely set foot in a church since other than the occasional school function and funeral.
However in the last 2/3 years I've really started to waver in my beliefs and feel like I really want to go to church to try to make sense of things. I'm far from sure that there is a God but I'm certainly no longer sure that there isn't. I feel like I need to listen to what is being said and make my own mind up.
However, I feel very uncomfortable with certain aspects of church services. I don't like saying the Lords Prayer because I'm not sure that I believe what I'm saying and I don't fully understand the need to say it out loud. I really don't feel comfortable with Communion because I'm not at peace with God. I'm also not 100% sure if I can receive it anyway as I've not been christened?
What I'm wondering is what other members of the congregation will think if I don't go for communion? Will it be awkward and will I feel pressured into doing something which I don't want to do? I know I could go along with it for an easy life but I find feel true to myself doing that.
I have mentioned to a couple of friends who are church goers that I don't want to take communion but I haven't said why (although I would be happy to tell them, just not explaining myself to strangers).
It is a village church where everyone knows everyone.
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need advice/thoughts from regular church goers re: Communion (long, sorry)
30 replies
RingUpRingRingDown · 21/04/2016 22:57
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