Daily Gratitudes

(969 Posts)
crescentmoon Wed 19-Sep-12 21:51:54

i was listening to Nina Simone's "Ain't Got No..." here or better one and i got to thinking about gratitude. apparently regular grateful thinking can increase happiness by as much as 25 percent just by wanting what one actually has. so i hope maybe that we can regularly write about the things that go well for us each day, no matter how little they are. from any faith and no faith too.

il start by saying over the past few days im grateful that...

1. its the middle of september and ds1 hasnt had to use his blue inhaler once
2. id worried that dd wouldnt like her new school but shes settled in very quickly
3. the sun shone brightly so i went exploring around my local high street
4. i have learnt how to make chai tea for myself now
5. the house is cosy and warm

Salbertina Thu 09-May-13 07:21:36

Salaams

Breakfast outside again if a little cold and wet!

The reassuring regularity of the rhythm of the sea

Time and resources to think and sort myself out a little

Namaste smile

Poledra Thu 09-May-13 09:40:43

Morning all. I have a huge gratitude today - you might not remember that, at the start of this thread, I talked about a professional acquaintance of mine who had been diagnosed with ovarian cancer. Well, I've just heard that she is coming back to work next month, her treatment has been successful and she has a very good prognosis smile I know she's not fully out of the woods yet, and she will be very worried about her health for some time to come but this is still wonderful news. I am so so grateful for our medical services and to our doctors and scientists who have developed the treatments which have saved the life of a good, hard-working woman who will hopefully have many years with her family and friends to enjoy.

Salbertina Thu 09-May-13 10:12:10

Hi Poledra
What wonderful news, puts things in perspective...

stressedHEmum Thu 09-May-13 10:34:30

Poledra, that is wonderful news. We are so blessed with healthcare in this country. All the time, we hear about failings and shortages and crises, but every day there are a host of small miracles going on in our health service that should cause us to rejoice.

Salbertina, yes, it is a trial to my patience sometimes. we haven't had an easy marriage and, many times, it has all been touch and go, especially when my DH was actively drinking and involved in drugs. Thankfully, that part of things is behind us now and he has been more or less sober for about 10 years with just a couple of slip ups. The fear is always there, though. Just another challenge to get over.

I'm afraid that I am very out of step with many on here in that I think that stability and security are worth a lot and are worth persevering for. Things are much better, now, and we jog along quote happily most of the time, but DH can be quote volatile and short tempered. You learn to compromise and avoid triggers most of the time and to tolerate each others short comings. There is a bible verse in 1st Corinthians 13 that says that "love is patient, love is kind....it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.....it always perseveres." I always think that is an ideal worth striving for.

I'm glad that Buddhism is helping you and bringing you some peace to think things through. I pray that things improve for you in your marriage, a well, because I know you are having a tough time. it can't be easy being a trailing wife, when you are dependant on your husband not just financially (like me) but for everything else as well.

crescent, I will pray for peace for you. You are always so patient, cheerful and self sacrificing. it must be really hard facing up to another move when you are so settled where you are, now, especially now that you have a job you are enjoying and friends in your community.

Today, I am grateful -

for the NHS
for security and peace
that my DD returned in one piece from GB camp, having had a fab time
for family and friends

crescentmoon Fri 10-May-13 08:22:32

Oh no just lost a long post when my phone died! The gist of it was poledra I'm very happy about your colleague and hope for her continued success. stressed and salbertina I've been inspired reading your posts this week ad had written a long reply but lost it. I think it's so valuable as women to speak about our experiences and lives and share wisdom. That's why I keep coming back to mumsnet for so many things!

Gratitudes before I'm off:

1.Iv been practising 'speak good or be silent' and DH has been, and we've had a nice week without the tension of last week,
2.Couldn't find my debit card anywhere then popped into the tescos near my work yday afternoon on the offchance and it had been handed in there!
3.though I can't understand how they're my children I'm grateful the dc don't like chocolates and sweets much as I did (and do still, abit, but I'm working n it!)
4.DH passed an exam that he'd taken a month ago so he's quite happy.
5.for me I'm feeling well, strong, more than my looks I'm grateful for the strength in my limbs.

stressedHEmum Sat 11-May-13 10:46:19

Morning all. How is everyone?

Today my gratitudes are short and sweet -

for another day
for my children - sibling board game afternoon today
that DS2 and 3 are involved in so much voluntary work and community service
food, shelter, clean water
friends that I can rely on
safety and security.

Salbertina Sat 11-May-13 16:18:40

Hello

Today am grateful for the lovely, insightful and supportive messages on this thread. Plus the wisdom to be had from others' life experience/religion etc... Personally, have learnt a lot! Thank you.

The unexpected opportunity for a much needed quiet and early night- for reflection/confronting my demons which is inevitable and timely. And long overdue. Appreciate my growing awareness of said demons as can overcome them that way and move on. Was meant to be our anniversary night out, sitter booked, the works, but all rather blown up. Which it needed to. Air is cleared, reflection will be had (and money saved!).

Am grateful that my dc are okay after a scare yesterday- horrible visions of them being swept away at sea from the beach where they got lost. Big relief, all ok, if a little shaken.

Am grateful for a connected 24 hours or so having spent way too much time online recently.

Am grateful for chance to take dc out for good bike ride this morning which even eldest enjoyed in the sunshine and fresh air.

Salbertina Sun 12-May-13 08:21:02

Morning

Today am grateful for kids/dh trying to remembering to mark mothers day. Dc1 said "didn't know what to say as all the arguing but i love you anyway", bittersweet but i rarely hear that so was lovely!

Dc2 regularly picks me flowers "just for you mummy" grin and was desperate to show me the card he had lovingly made! Aah!

Dc1 gave up his last chocolate for me!

Dh -despite recent warring and being on v short fuse- is trying

crescentmoon Sun 12-May-13 12:43:26

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

stressedHEmum Mon 13-May-13 09:47:06

I'm sorry that your anniversary was spoiled, Salbertina, but glad that you were able to clear the air. Hopefully now you will be able to start to make some progress and begin to find some peace.

Marriage is like a long journey that you have to take one step at a time (sorry, very twee.) You just have to keep going, trusting that you'll get there in the end. A bit like DS3's hiking. He has a 2 day, 50km one coming up!

Very, very glad that your kids are OK after your scare. the beach is a scary place, the sea is so unpredictable but kids don't understand that.

Crescent, I hope that your small hope grows into a big one and then blooms into a beautiful bright flower.

Today, I am grateful that -

my BB speedway trip went well yesterday. I didn't go - can't stand for that long - and I was worried about it.
sunshine between the rain
for plenty of volunteers for my Summer Mission
that my friend has an interview on Thursday - he is really struggling with being unemployed
food, water, shelter
peace and security
DS2 secured a uni scholarship - takes the pressure of us trying to support him.

crescentmoon Mon 13-May-13 09:56:57

fabulous news stressed about ds2, will post more later but just wanted to say congratulations to him. and eldest ds is graduating this summer too right? onwards upwards and forwards for you all God Willing!

Poledra Mon 13-May-13 11:03:36

Salbertina I'm sorry your anniversary was spoiled. There have been some wise words posted here about marriages. I think the key point for me was realising that my marriage was not just a fixed thing - it is constantly changing, so I cannot take it for granted and have to think about how I want it to change, or how I will deal with the changes that happen regardless of me. So, for example, DH is likely to be made redundant in the very near future. He wants to set up for himself, which terrifies the living shit out of me, to be frank. But it's something he has wanted to do for a long time. So we've agreed he will try it. However, the house and family savings will be protected (he'll be ltd anyway) and, in the beginning at least, my job will be our top priority, as we cannot afford for that to go when DH has no income. And I will not tolerate him thinking that, as soon as I walk in the door, he can abdicate all childcare to me in order that he can concentrate on his company (let's be clear, the DCs are all in school so he will have the school day for his company).

crescent, I've been doing my job for years now, and I'm still waiting for someone to find me out as incompetent wink. I never have sufficient confidence in my own ability, I always feel I could have done more/done it better etc.

My gratitudes today are:
DD2's tummy bug was only a 24-hour thing, and she's fine now
That, after I drove off leaving something still on the roof of my car, DD1 managed to find it again in the grass by the side of the lane - I was a very grateful mum (though she did rib me mercilessly about it, and took great delight in rushing in to tell DH what I'd done, as I'm always giving out to her about being careless with her things blush)!
And, most importantly, after reading TrinityRhino's thread, I am so very very grateful for the continued health of my children and husband (in case you don't know, Trinity lost her husband in a car accident a few years ago. Sadly, her new partner died in their home on Saturday sad).

stressedHEmum Wed 15-May-13 09:32:19

Will try to post properly later, if I get the chance.

Today, I am grateful

that DS4 seems a bit better this morning - he's been very poorly and I haven't slept for 2 days
for the strength of God in keeping me on my feet for the last 2 days - I could weep with pain and fatigue but God gives me the strength to do what has to be done
that the rest of the kids don't seem to be catching whatever it is - thanks be to God
for sunshine at the moment, perhaps I will get some washing dried today
for my partner at BB who has taken over most of the organising of parents' night tomorrow night because I can't see to DS and do that as well.

stressedHEmum Thu 16-May-13 09:29:17

Today's main gratitude -

the NHS and medical staff.

DS4 is in hospital having his appendix out. Poor wee thing is terrified but trying to be brave.

Am also grateful for -
DS2 taking a day off college to help out if needed
my parents - taking the other 2 so that DH and I can be at the hospital.

crescentmoon Fri 17-May-13 17:29:35

Namaste everybody,

Had a so so week, that little hope didnt work out but unlike other times DH has stayed really accepting of it as philosophical. Still on for moving even though his contract ends in dec but its a dead end after that so better to go now with what will take him to next year.

salbertina my dear really hope you are well and will come online soon. poledra I think you are dong a great thing being supportive of your DH and I certainly agree with your pragmatic conditions. It's difficult being made redundant can be very mentally happening so its great both of you see the positives and a way to fulfil each others ambitions. I'd hoped we'd be stabilised this year but maybe 2014 instead!

stressed really hope you are well lovely. Been great to read your gratitudes and I find myself nodding to alot of them. So sorry about dc4 having appendix out I really hope that he's recovering today. Thank goodness for your parents being able to help wTh other dc. That's what I worry sometimes about needing to go into hospital and not having family around to help. But thats when a faith community can really help and rally around

crescentmoon Fri 17-May-13 17:50:27

gratitudes this week so far (hope to post daily from now on)

DH took some disappointing news well
we've booked a little family trip away, probably our last as a family of 5!
weather was generally nice and bright this week,
Dc are well,
My family and friends are all well,
Grateful for the NHS,
Grateful for regular clean public transport- not cheap but you can't have everything!

Salbertina Sun 19-May-13 20:58:42

Namaste

Dear all - I've been hovering (not quite sure what to post) and have taken comfort from your messages, your fortitude and your gratitudes despite some significant challenges.

Poledra- lovely to see you back, good to share experiences and feel less alone.. Agree, it helps to see relationships in constant state of flux. Sometimes think I've had change overload though (mainly self-induced!) Hope the job-hunt goes well and no more losing previous items from car rooftops ; ) - made me howl grin but glad you found the item concerned.

Stressed- I'm really sorry to hear you've been in such pain. Can you get more medication or other help ?? And yet you appreciate the rays of sunlight when so many wouldn't when feeling like that. Good for you, you are an inspiration.

Crescent- smile how are things/plans going now? And your trip? Must be for half-term? I hope it gives you lovely, relaxing family time.

Today's gratitudes for me:

We finally (after much debate/procrastination/temporary loss of essential items) made it out for a lovely bike ride with dc who had SUCH fun!

(At the risk of being a bore!) I never tire of looking at the sea, how swiftly and brutally it can change, one minute soft and calm as a lake, moments later the wind picks up and waves are crashing against the rocks and clouds come rolling in, wonderful.

And finally, i also have "known" Trinityrhino from MN over the years and cannot believe that she's having to go through yet another, similar and devastating bereavement. I am grateful that she gets -and inspires- such MN and RL support. It also makes me appreciate what i have, while i still have it (though stupidly not nearly enough of the time. Nor do i show it much).

Salbertina Sun 19-May-13 21:03:49

Poledra- precious item, i meant, sorry! And scrub what i said about job-hunt- i remember your understandable concerns about dh going self-employed. Well, i hope it works out for the best. Dh sometimes mutters about something similar and must admit, much as i support his dreams, i DO worry about the mortgage! Tricky balance...

Salbertina Mon 20-May-13 07:38:27

Morning smile

Healthy dc

My growing awareness of importance of connecting, not having a "life unlived" ...
Needing to train my attention and be mindful- face my fears to overcome the aggression of judgemental thinking and being dominated by fight/flight

"If you bring forth what is within you, what is within you will save you. If you do not bring forth what is within you, what is within you will destroy you" - Jesus Christ

Choices esp fertility choices - what a fortunate generation we are, relatively speaking, all the more so to be first world

Time today

crescentmoon Mon 20-May-13 08:18:08

""If you bring forth what is within you, what is within you will save you. If you do not bring forth what is within you, what is within you will destroy you" - Jesus Christ"

thats really interesting salbertina. we have something similar about Jesus too. the Sufi Muslim tradition features alot about Jesus, the sufi poet Rumi said "The body is like Mary. Every one of us has a Jesus within him, but until the pangs manifest in us our Jesus is not born. If the pangs never come, then Jesus rejoins his origin by the same secret path by which he came, leaving us bereft and without portion of him."

i really hope things are going ok for you dear one.

my gratitudes will mirror yours i think:

for choices
for time

Salbertina Mon 20-May-13 08:20:33

.."without a portion of him".
Wow, love Rumi, timeless and v profound.

Salbertina Tue 21-May-13 09:31:52

Ok, case of disappearing post again! Um, what did i say???

The sea
Dh's support for me with tricky dc issues
Feeling more human after exercise

Namaste

Salbertina Wed 22-May-13 07:29:12

Morning all smile

Today, Im grateful for

Seasons and their reminder of change, ebb and flow of life

Words from the wise man in my life quite a comfort.

Dc managed homework ok, not always easy.

Dh got job options.

crescentmoon Wed 22-May-13 07:58:01

morning salbertina!

just checking in, so happy to read your gratitudes my love.

mine today:

i loved waking up and coming down to a tidy house - it was worth the half hour last night!
im grateful that, whatever else, i can rely on Allah and myself
that in my having to disconnect from the dc in order to do my job properly DH has stepped up to connect with them far more than he ever has before,
that i get good feedback from work and i feel pride in that.

stressedHEmum Wed 22-May-13 09:38:57

How is everyone? I'm glad things seem to be going well.

Today I am grateful -

that DS4 is out of hospital - it was all a bit touch and go as his appendix nearly ruptured and he was septic after the op.
for medical staff and the NHS
for DH's work giving him time off
for God giving me the strength to get through it
for this thread and the lovely people on it
for sunshine and the lovely weather the last 2 days.

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