"My eyes fell on her" "Her eyes followed him around the room" ugh

(8 Posts)

I cannot fully express my irritation at seeing these phrases in a piece of writing! A book I have been reading recently (not very good so my own fault I suppose for persevering with it), is littered with eye balls leading full and independent lives rolling around and following people. So annoying.

STOP IT NOW - I call for a ban on the phrase... and breath. blush

AdoraBell Thu 06-Mar-14 13:56:35

Gives me the creeps too. Have any characters had their eyes " meet across a crowded room"?

Mainly the eyes have been rolling, falling and following but they are probably meeting too, the sods. It is just once you notice an overused expression or word then it becomes really distracting. A book I read last year the author used 'stark' all the bloody time "stark trees", "stark face", "stark eyes" !! Get a bloody thesaurus or stop describing everything!

AdoraBell Thu 06-Mar-14 14:06:14

Yes, and yes - Get that thesaurus before you even think about writing another book, nameless author.

CalamityKate Thu 06-Mar-14 14:06:45

"His eyes slid down the front of her dress" grin

badly written repetitive fiction does have an entertainment factor of course. Possibly a really lonely and tragic drinking game?

I am imagining gelatinous spheres sliding into a cleavage - shudder {see I have a thesaurus} Calamity grin

What is wrong with 'his gaze travelled down her form' or something like that...?

ohmymimi Thu 06-Mar-14 19:08:37

Thank you! I had never given this any thought and now I will spot it eveywhere. Calamity made me laugh out loud, though.

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