Baby shower (of sh*te)

[Moomin]

am i the only one who thinks baby showers are rubbish and completely unnecessary? I've just been invited to my 3rd one in 6 months today. can't think of much worse.

[UCM]

One of my friends said I should have one, I said 'no way - that is american and it's just so you get presents'.

It's a crap idea and I have enough pressies to buy without doing one of these every time someone gets up the duff!!!

[Moomin]

Don;t know exactly - I've managed to duck out of all of them so far!! Think the mum gets lots of pressies (for her? for the baby? don't know) and tea is drunk and cakes are eaten. Don't mind the idea of a get-together but don't get all the present guff. I buy presents when the baby's born. Is it like a tame hen party?

[Moomin]

here you go

[Blu]

Hideous American custom! (the custom - not the Americans practising it!!)

[Pruni]

Message withdrawn

[moondog]

tis all utter greedy bollocks

[paulaplumpbottom]

Now wait a sec, we have very practical reasons for doing this. When I had my daughter here in the UK, I didn't have a Babyshowerand instead everyone brought gifts when they came to see DD. This was horrible. It meant that I had to look after a newborn and write thankyou cards. If you have a shower this doesn't happen. We also do this for brides (bridal showers).

[jamieboo]

we had a surprise party to congratulate us with our first as we had had problems concieving and everyone and us were very excited, but there were gifts for us but we didnt ask for them.
But we were kind of thrown one by a friend when we announced that second preg was twins, a lot of our friends felt we needed help buying extra things but we never asked for any of it but it was all appreciated and nice to know everyone cared and wanted to help out ... iyswim!

[Moomin]

How can being bought gifts for you and your baby ever be describes as 'horrible' ?! Everyone else seems to manage ok with receiving gifts having a baby and writing thank you cards! I guess it's just seen as a bit naff here. It's just not part of our traditions. I think the most I could stretch to would be a small get together for someone going off on maternity leave from work - but there again, if I'm that friendly with someone, I'll see them when they're at home and when they've had the baby as well.

[UCM]

Because.............no matter what, you feel like you have to buy something when the baby is born as well. What with Holloween, Birthday Parties, Party Bags, Teachers Birthday, Showers etc. The next thing will be bleedin Thanksgiving. I will be spending all me money on bloody presents

[paulaplumpbottom]

Sorry Moomin, you are righ, the gifts were lovely, thats not what I meant. Why UCM would you have to buy two gifts? The baby shower gift is the gift.

[Moomin]

because we just don't do the baby shower thing over here as a rule and the tradition is to visit the family and new baby in the 1st few weeks and take a gift and congrats card then.

From what I've seen of the US showers from the websites, the mum to be gets all her equipment bought for her at her shower. Over here, it's usually the couple and maybe the family who buy the baby bath, the moses basket, bedding and all that. Gifts for new babies tend to be toys or clothes I'd say.

I think UCM means that if she's given something at a baby shower she'd feel 'empty-handed' when the baby came along and might feel obliged to get something else.

[expatinscotland]

I hate them! I hate to see this trend crossing the pond.

They're so naff and goofy. All those silly games, for one.

And then showcasing a pregnant woman and her opening presents in front of everyone - I'd have been absolutely mortified!

As for writing thank-you's w/a newborn, my mother wrote them while I looked after the babies.

Put a stop to it! Fight the power!

They're horrid.

[CountTo10]

We have them at work as a way of sending the person off and everyone gets a small gift rather than doing it after. At mine the girls clubbed together and got me the baby monitor I wanted. We've also done them for some of my friends just before the due date as a way of having a catch up before the 'event' and to present a small collection of gifts (that the mother wanted) but we don't then get pressies after. We've never done it as a massive money spinner or gift extravaganzer just as a way of making a fuss of the mum to be, at a time when they are usually feeling very fed up. I loved mine as it was a great way of catching up with everyone before I lost touch with reality for a while!!!

[fennel]

I am trying to imagine my friends' reactions if I invited them round to play games such as "Pin the baby on the Mummy".

Can't see it catching on really.

[GreenLumpyTonsilsAgain]

LOL at moondog's "utter greedy bollocks"

I must say that by about 16 weeks in both my pregnancies I looked like a poached egg on legs and was alternately weeping, giggling insanely and cramming food into my face. I can't think of anything that would have thrilled me less than an alcohol-free, women-only party to celebrate my alarming transition into Mr Staypuft from Ghostbusters. Pure horror IMO.

[mamama]

Oh, sooo American. I'm in the States and had 2 suprise baby showers when I was pg with DS. I had no idea about either of them and hated being the centre of attention more than I already was. At my work 'do', I was made to sit at the front of the room and open each gift, Oooing & Aahing appropriately

People spent a fortune - we got tons of baby bath stuff (had to give it away as DS was allergic to it), clothes (too many to wear), 5 hooded towels, books, toys, a nursing pillow, a few bits & bobs for me and $130 gap gift card. I know at some showers, everyone clubs together to buy one bog gift such as a car seat or the crib.

A few people sent cards and a small gift when DS was born, but I think the idea of the shower is that all the gift giving is done in advance.

And, after all the money spent on the gifts, not one person, out of about 40 has been in contact with us since Ds was 12 weeks old.

I have also heard many mothers complain about their showers - "I got X but I really wanted Y".

So, I agree with you all - quite unnecessary even if the sentiment behind it is a nice one. I hope this doesn't sound ungrateul because I was truly very appreciative of everyone's kindness, it was just a bit OTT for me!

[mamama]

Oh, and expat mentioned, the games are AWFUL. I didn't want people guessing the size of my bump measured in pieces of loo roll!

[Moomin]

If I'd have had a baby shower my guests could have guessed the size of my piles using rolled up loo roll

[expatinscotland]

It is such greedy bollocks. And so attention-drawing. The mother paraded around like a freakshow.

Boak!

Another thing I was glad to leave behind.

[Moomin]

In fact, let's think of some games for a Baby Shower of Sh*te:

Guess the length of mum to be's pubic hair now she can't reach her fanjo to tidy it up

Competition to find out the most filthy inappropriate dream had by the mum to be

...er