Anyone swithering over having a third baby? Here is my day so far.

(49 Posts)
ZuluWarrior Sun 27-Oct-13 09:38:05

Midnight BST: Feed DS2 (3 months) who went to bed at 7.30 and was fed at 9.30.
2am: Replug DS2 with dummy.
3am: Feed DS2 and put back to bed.
2.30am GMT: Feed DS2 and put back to bed.
3am: bring DS2 into bed.
3-7: I have no recollection of events but when I wake up baby has a new nappy and is on the other side of me than when I was asleep.
7am: Awoken by sounds of DS1 (4.7) being sent to his room for giving DH cheek yet again. Feed DS2.
8.30am: Put DS2 to bed. Screams. DH takes DS1 out to buy pumpkins. DD (2.3) screams.
8.40am: DH returns with DS1 who has fallen off his bike and is screaming.
Put DS1 and DD in front of milkshake so I can shower.
8.50am: bring DD into bathroom to stop fighting. DD screams. Baby asleep.
9am: Shower finished. DD has started playing with gruffalo book.
9.02am: Hear baby screaming

3littlewomen Sun 27-Oct-13 09:45:13

It gets better - I promise! DD1 just brought us tea in bed, DD2 & 3 downstairs playing, DS1 sleeping in his pit and DS2 asleep beside us... That's 5!

The first years are hard, but I love it now the older ones are semi-sane!

FruitSaladIsNotPudding Sun 27-Oct-13 09:50:37

See, that's exactly what I am afraid of. Dh and I both really want a third child. We just can't bear the thought of having a third baby!!

ZuluWarrior Sun 27-Oct-13 18:34:14

I do apologise - I started this thread on my phone and thought I'd lost it. Didn't realise it'd been posted!

I didn't finish it. It should have ended:

9.15am - write this message while feeding baby. DS1 and DD scream and bicker while climbing on me.


ZuluWarrior Sun 27-Oct-13 18:36:34

3littlewomen that sounds amazing!

Fruitsalad go for it. The good outweighs the bad - just. Hate the night times though. I go a bit mad I think. During the day I'm pretty good at putting my game face on.

Idislikemymil Sun 27-Oct-13 18:41:18

Having 3 is lovely. Most of the time.

There are days when I want to run away and never come back - but not very often!

ZuluWarrior Sun 27-Oct-13 18:43:15

Idislike I find myself actively squirrelling away the good bits to access later when it's all gone tits up!

eggybrokenoff Sun 27-Oct-13 18:53:24

i am 10 weeks pg with no 3. i have severe hyperemesis. both dcs have gastroenteritis at the moment as does dh. last few days have been horrific.

please please tell me something lovely about having 3 before i bury my head in a full sick bowl and never come up?!

BoyGirlBoy3 Sun 27-Oct-13 19:01:54

You get to extend it all a bit, when your dc2 is finishing lower school, you have something to soften the blow, dc3. smile applies to so many things. They look so cute together at times, and make so many lovely games and pictures, that you treasure the memories forever.x

ZuluWarrior Mon 28-Oct-13 01:11:49

Eggy, watching DS2's adoring big brother and sister with him is lovely. And he saves his biggest smiles for them, not his poor old Mum who fed him all night!

StupidFlanders Mon 28-Oct-13 01:26:29

Ah well I can offer some hope. When I had 3 dcs I was probably woken during the night 5 times in the first year (from when dc3 was 6 weeks).
I was just thinking last night that I don't think any dc has ever come to my room to wake me up and to be honest I don't find 3 dcs difficult.
4 though....

ZingWantsCake Mon 28-Oct-13 04:45:09

we have 6.

Claryrocks Mon 28-Oct-13 14:24:19

I have one DD aged 5 and a DS coming up for 3 and am sooooo broody. I just need to convince my husband. I do see the logic at stopping - another means less time to spend with my two, less money to spend on them - more mess and noise. But it just feels like there is a third one out there for me and I need to gather him/her in. sounds freaky I know.

ZuluWarrior Mon 28-Oct-13 19:21:38

Thanks StupidFlanders. That is hope indeed! Also, I'll be going to work in Feb so my life will be much easier then grin.

Zing I am in awe, as always.

Clary, I know what you mean. There's something just right about having 3 and for some reason it makes me feel like a proper grown up (because having 2 children at 32 didn't!).

There, you've all made me feel better. And today we all lay on the floor and did duplo and for about 5 minutes it was beautiful. Before the screaming restarted grin

ZingWantsCake Mon 28-Oct-13 19:22:08

thanks Zulusmile

There's a way of making three seem easy
Have four wink

(From the only other warrior with 4 who isn't boff)

ZuluWarrior Mon 28-Oct-13 19:27:25

Hahahahaha. From Norfolk by any chance? grin. Have 4 - a bit like squash and a sqeeze?

That'll be me smile

Does duplo always make you scream? grin

ZingWantsCake Mon 28-Oct-13 20:08:14


what are the chances of those four children being:





ZuluWarrior Mon 28-Oct-13 20:16:48

Lots of things make me scream. Duplo is only one of them thlsmile.

Bigfingers Mon 28-Oct-13 20:17:19

From the OP : 3-7: I have no recollection of events but when I wake up baby has a new nappy and is on the other side of me than when I was asleep. this tickled me.

We are 19m in to having three (DD1 is 6.4, DS1 3.4, DS2 19m) and I can honestly say the first year of having three was HELL ON EARTH. Having two was such a breeze, DS1 was such a calm baby, slept well, so even though DD1 was a handful and her sleeping has only really settled down since she was 5, we thought we'd worked it out and no.3 would be fine. I'm going to say this really quietly in case he hears, but DS2 is a demon child nightmare. He bites DS1, won't sleep, started biting my boobs when I was BF-ing from 7m to the point where he got blood (fasted wean in history ensued), screams ALL the time (still), bites my shoulder when I'm carrying him, has slept through maybe TWICE since birth. Every 6 months we keep saying, ahhh, it'll all be better in 6m time. Please god let it be better by next summer.

I feel your pain OP. big time. hang in there
cake cake cake cake cake

Bigfingers Mon 28-Oct-13 20:18:07


Bigfingers Mon 28-Oct-13 20:22:40

Clary that's how I felt. And once you feel it, you can't unfeel it... my three are all gorgeous and I don't regret it, but I really am looking forward to the screaming-baby stage being over. grin

Go choose the wrong hat grin

ZuluWarrior Mon 28-Oct-13 20:33:04

Oh Biginfingers. That sounds like hell. I bet you secretly thought (like I did) that the third child would just fit in and kind of sit in the corner smiling. Oh, how I'm laughing now!

ZuluWarrior Mon 28-Oct-13 20:33:33

Biginfingers? Bigfingers!

mummyxtwo Tue 29-Oct-13 07:37:51

I have 2, ds1 4.10yo and dd2 12mo, and we have just agreed to start TTC for baby number 3. I have to do all the nights as dh is a surgeon and can't exactly operate in a fog of sleep deprivation "It was the other leg, you say? Ahhh... Oops." And we have 6 months in Sydney from Jan 2015 for his work, and the idea of a baby plus 2 other dc's on a flight to the other side of the world is beyond the scope of my most imaginative nightmares. But... I really want 3! Clearly broodiness can override sane logical thinking.

Mumof3xx Tue 29-Oct-13 07:42:26

And here is my day so far ....
Midnight - feed dd
1am - back to sleep
4am - Feed dd who then won't go back to sleep
5am - give up and come downstairs
6 am - dd asleep I curl up on sofa
6.30 - ds2 up wants food
6.45 - dd more milk and porridge
7.00 - ds 1 up wants food

Dd currently wingeing on her play mat, ds 2 half dressed refusing to get any more dressed ds 1 moaning at teeth brushing

Luckily this is not a work day

AnotherWorld Tue 29-Oct-13 07:54:18

I have three. Hang in there. Mine are 8, 6 and 4 and are currently playing Playmobil (between bouts of fighting)

Mumof3xx Tue 29-Oct-13 07:55:00

I hate play mobile

3monkeys Tue 29-Oct-13 08:09:10

And when they're older, they do lots for 'the baby' (who's now 8 but DH won't have any more!) So it gets much easier. Mine are now 14, 12 and 8 and Ds 2 who is number 3 is a sweet heart.

AnotherWorld Tue 29-Oct-13 08:25:27

Hate Playmobil?

What did it ever do to you to elicit such a harsh reaction?

Mumof3xx Tue 29-Oct-13 08:45:27

I bought a zoo
I spent hours building it
They pulled it apart
I cried

Maybe it's the dc though not play mobile lol

ZuluWarrior Tue 29-Oct-13 11:11:24

Mummyxtwo good luck! I work with lots of surgeons and I feel for their partners. The long hours! The unpredictabilty!

Mumofthree I think we are in a very similar boat. It's like crying relays, isn't it? And.... pass the baton on!

Another, thank you. I am looking foward.

3monkeys thanks too!

Idratherbeknitting Tue 29-Oct-13 11:28:21

Mumof3xx I bought the zoo too. Same thing. Gave it Grandparents who police playmobil brilliantly, and now not my problem.

I became single when pg with DD3, so had the similar never ending cycle of fighting/feeding baby/screaming (from us all)/no sleep, as they were 6-2-nb at the time.

Scroll forwards five years and I now have a toddler DS, and life is noisy, but brilliant, my girls are all 'big' (in school full time), and my little boy benefits from much attention and play (still won't sleep through the night).

I wouldn't change a thing, and as they get older, I find I forget how brain-achingly hard it all was!

It gets so much better! (but they still fight like cats).

notso Tue 29-Oct-13 11:47:18

I have a hormonal stroppy 13yo, a 9 yo who has issues with many things, food, crowds, change to name but a few, a 'spirited' 2.10 yo and an 18 month old. It is day 2 of half term and I am ready to cry!

kwt Tue 29-Oct-13 12:21:00

Zulu and bigfingers, totally know what you're feeling. I thought this period of maternity leave would be lovely, I know what I'm doing with babies, this one'll just fit in.
Nope. He's completely broken us. Dd1 and 2 weren't great sleepers but he takes the cake. Also has eczema and all manner of allergies, had an emergency operation, nightmare when teething. He's 7 months! I feel like I've aged 10 years. I am not broody any more!
Having said that, he's just lovely smile

Bigfingers Tue 29-Oct-13 20:55:06

Zulu for some reason that really made me laugh that you called me Biginfingers. mostly because I am verging on hysteria all the time
I TOTALLY thought number three would just fit in. Everyone I consulted about the wisdom of three told me that he would. THEY WERE LIARS smile
Tbf, I know some people whose third does seem to do that and I hate them and obviously has slept through from 6 weeks. >>forced smiles all round!!!<<

I have since noticed that most people who don't seem to struggle with three have a bigger gap between DC2 and DC3. My gap is 21 months, the reasoning being that I would be getting this stage over with more quickly and get back to FT work sooner, and that they may be closer as a result of being nearer in age. Hoping that both reasons will still work out but I think the small age gap has been the main problem, so mummyxtwo if you are in a position to wait, I would heartily recommend a three year age gap - that's the gap I have between DD and DS1 and it was an absolute breeze. DD was old enough to help get me snacks out of fridge when I was breastfeeding, understood to be a bit quiet when I went upstairs to put DS1 down for a nap, etc etc. Also out at playgroup quite a bit so I got some kip when DS1 was sleeping and she was out.

kwt I remember joking to DH that there was NO WAY DC3 would be harder than DD, who was a godawful sleeper til she was about 21m, then she gradually started to get better, then at about 4 she started having night terrors every night til she was over 5. Finally she is sorted. He is at least twice as bad. So that's the next 3 years to look forward to then!!!! >>silently weeps<<

dinkystinky Tue 29-Oct-13 21:08:16

I have 3 - stroppy 7 year old ds1 (who appears to be hitting the teenage sulks early, lucky me), demanding 4 year old ( who has started having nightmares since starting school - and doing nocturnal poos oh joy) and 16 week ds3 who is lovely and cuddly but does not sleep, has reflux (and is the cause of 5 loads of washing today) and wants to be held all the time. I love my boys but just sometimes I'd like to press pause and relish some peace and quiet (and sleep!) For a bit!

ZuluWarrior Tue 29-Oct-13 22:43:06

You're all making me feel much better. Thank you! (although shouldn't have watched that David Tennant thing before going to bed. I made sure all the doors were locked twice).

The baby has pinged his dummy somewhere and I can't find it. I've just spent 5 minutes searching with the light of my phone round his cot before giving up.


ZuluWarrior Tue 29-Oct-13 22:45:14

Dinky I have a stroppy first son too. This week he's been shouting " but you just don't CARE" before stropping off to his room. He's only 4.7!!

ZuluWarrior Tue 29-Oct-13 22:52:29

Kwt I'm not broody any more either. I know absolutely that I don't want any more. The maty clothes are long gone and I've just given away all the 0-3 month stuff too!

ZingWantsCake Wed 30-Oct-13 07:04:49

I have many stroppy people in the house.

the answer to the problem is ice cream!grin

dinkystinky Wed 30-Oct-13 09:57:43

Zulu I sold all my mat gear and most of other 0-3 clothes when ds3 was 2 months old!

Zing - am sadly having to be dairy free for the reflux monster. Not that it seems to be helping much.

thestylethatdecadesforgot Wed 30-Oct-13 10:19:35

I don't know how I feel now I found this thread. I have bad morning sickness and am 11wks only with dc3. I desperately wanted a third and I started a thread asking what it was like to have three but didn't get much response. Well now I know! I have quite a few friends with three but when we get together, five kids makes so much noise it's hard to talk! There will be 22 months between dd2 and dc3 and dd1 will be 3.11 so they will all be quite close. I'm dreading dd2 not being out of nappies when dc3 arrives.

dinkystinky Wed 30-Oct-13 20:38:56

You know what, no matter how much I complain/down gin, I do love having my 3 boys Thestylethatdecadesforgot - when I had one I had hard days, when I had 2 I had hard days and now I have 3 I have hard days - but the good times definitely outshine the bad ones with 3. Dont let it worry you too much - and if you do have hard days, remember there are plenty of us out there having the same!

soundstrue Wed 30-Oct-13 20:52:05

I have 3, wouldn't change that. What annoys me most is holidays, very few hotels, package holidays or B&Bs cater for a family of 5. I'd just love to book a hotel break for us all at a reasonable price.
Moves away dreaming of a family break in a nice hotel....

ZuluWarrior Wed 30-Oct-13 22:42:51

Thestyle I'm with dinky. Even though I have cried more in the last few weeks than ever before and most bedtimes make me want to run away screaming, I don't regret my third. And I keep telling myself I'm playing the long game grin and that before I know it they'll be playing nicely together and making me cups of tea in bed.

But the first few months: aaaaaaaarrgghh!!!

ZuluWarrior Wed 30-Oct-13 22:43:41

Soundstrue I really want a caravan again, but DH is having none of it. The fecker.

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