So... If you DC has a different / unpopular name...

(95 Posts)
ElBombero Mon 07-Oct-13 19:57:14

If you've chosen a slightly different name have you had a wobble about it later?

I am and just hoping it passes...

sonlypuppyfat Mon 07-Oct-13 19:59:05

What's the name do tell

ElBombero Mon 07-Oct-13 20:34:56

Lots of previous threads. DS name is Sonny

Sonny is a nice name though!

Is it just that you think it doesn't suit him, or do you actually not like saying the word Sonny?

invicta Mon 07-Oct-13 20:38:29

Sonny is lovely.. My siblings and I all have semi - unusual names - not completely crazy but not popular or weird spellings. Eg Heather, Caspien . We've always loved the names

onedev Mon 07-Oct-13 20:43:03

I love Sonny!!

ElBombero Mon 07-Oct-13 20:43:31

Aw thank, he's only a couple if weeks old so not a matter of him suiting it, and I do like saying it. It's just people's reactions I think, I had some negatives one of my family early on and struggling to shake them.

Bluestocking Mon 07-Oct-13 20:43:43

What's the nature of your wobble - do you feel as though you've gone off the name, does he not look like a Sonny any more, have you caught someone you thought was a friend laughing about it? And how old is young Sonny?

sonlypuppyfat Mon 07-Oct-13 20:50:04

I can see why you are wobbling

ElBombero, Ive seen your previous threads. Sonny is lovely and I`m sure the name suits him. I think this is more about your insecurities with your family, if you change his name now just to please them then you will be so angry with yourself later on.

How are they now? Have they said anything else?

Cosmo89 Mon 07-Oct-13 20:59:39

Sonny isn't very 'out there' in my opinion

It's a classic.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

tethersend Mon 07-Oct-13 21:03:16

Ah, don't worry. I called DD2 Shirley, which is universally hated grin

I love it, though. And she completely owns the name.

sonlypuppyfat Mon 07-Oct-13 21:03:24

I wouldn't call it a classic I've never known any

neolara Mon 07-Oct-13 21:05:13

My dh has a very unusual name. Apart from his dad and our son, he is the only person in the country with this name. Really. He loves it. He says that people remember him.

Sonny is a lovely name! I've had/am having the same thing with 8mo DS's name - I think I can't say it properly, I don't like the spelling that DP and I had agreed on before he was born. I wanted to think about other names once he was actually born but he was already the name he is now as far as DP and his family were concerned. Next baby is having no name til it is born.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

littlemisssarcastic Mon 07-Oct-13 21:11:01

Yes, I wobbled over DD's name a lot, and even after 6 months, it didn't feel right IYSWIM, but now, I can't imagine her being called any other name.

Viviennemary Mon 07-Oct-13 21:11:32

It's up to you in the end. But if you want to change it do it sooner rather than later.

LizzieVereker Mon 07-Oct-13 21:12:13

Sonny is a great name, and I've taught several Sonnys, all of whom were lovely. I think it's not uncommon now, so you'll probably find the raised eyebrows get fewer and fewer.

Chibbs Mon 07-Oct-13 21:15:19

i really like it , i know a very nice sonny.

NandH Mon 07-Oct-13 21:15:27

Sonny is a lovely name, I use to work with a lovely lady that had a lovely little boy Sonny.

My dd has an unusual name, and I too still wobble about it, but do you know what it suits her and has a beautiful meaning and once people know what it means they seem to love it also! smile

marriedinwhiteisback Mon 07-Oct-13 21:20:17

I think if it's worrying you so much you need to have a rethink while there's still time. I'm sorry but it has "oi, sonny, wotcher doin'" connotations for me.

HidingInTheBathroom Mon 07-Oct-13 21:24:03

My dd is called Dallas after her godmother who has passed away. She suits it I call her dally for short. I do find myself explaining her name it's not American and the originates from Scotland but at the end I don't care because I like it. grin

HidingInTheBathroom Mon 07-Oct-13 21:26:25

Forgot to say I love the name sonny.

MrsDeVere Mon 07-Oct-13 21:29:50

It is a great name.
Stop worrying about it.

I have a son with one of the most hated names on MN.
I didn't name him, his birth mother did.

No way would I change his name, take away his history just because people are snotty about a perfectly nice name.

You chose his name, you like it, just forget about anyone else.

I think that names that are a bit unusual won't stand out that much by the time your DS is an adult. I can't imagine a doctor or solicitor called "Sonny" at the moment, but I think that will change.

bsc Mon 07-Oct-13 21:30:24

We know a lovely little Sonny- he's 4, and a real sweetie! If you like it, keep it.

sonlypuppyfat Mon 07-Oct-13 21:31:02

Perhaps it depends on where you live.

ElBombero Mon 07-Oct-13 21:33:29

Thanks onestepcloser, I remember you, you've hit the nail on the head really. I forgave my GP almost immediately, their 80+ and as one poster put it no self edit. My dad has continued to be rude about it, I sent him an email bluntly saying How I felt, how hurt I was and that I want him to accept and move on. Had no response or acknowledgement from the email but no further comment either.

Just hard cos we were so damn close before, we never had any conflict bar this, and because if that I don't feel like I can really have it out with him, yet it's built a little wedge, maybe I'm having the wobble cos I'm wondering if he's right? If I will fix it...

froken Mon 07-Oct-13 21:35:17

My ds is called E.l.v.i.n ( without the dots, that is to hopefully make is less Google-able) I love his name but people always say "oh Alvin, like the chipmunk" I have had times where I have wished I called him Alvin ( or Dave or anything easy to say) but mostly I love his name.

I have had such lovely comments about his name andit really suits him.

I think sonny if a great name.

ElBombero Mon 07-Oct-13 21:36:29

Thank you thank you thank you everyone. I always feel so much better when I talk in here about it. I do love his name. Need some thicker skin! X

Well hes not right ElBombero! Sonny is your child, he had his chance to name his own children and now this is yours, you tell him that grin

Seriously, if your close, tell him, tell him your hurt. Tell him he needs to be on your side. The thing is if you allow him to ride roughshod over this, then it might set a precedence.

El, my name is Loveday (outed myself there, but I dont think anyone I know is on here, or are they grin, my grandmother nearly had a fit! She thought I was going to be Annabelle.

bundaberg Mon 07-Oct-13 21:44:45

Sonny is a fantastic name!

nurseneedshelp Mon 07-Oct-13 21:49:46

Sonny is an amazing name, if you like it then don't change it because a relative has made a negative comment!

*sonlypuppyfat I think we get that you don't like the name! Leave the thread now that you've made your point......

bsc Mon 07-Oct-13 21:50:14

Onestep- your name is utterly gorgeous! smile I really like it.

Sorry, will stop gushing, and slink away...

Sindarella Mon 07-Oct-13 21:50:58

I love Sonny, and Dallas an Elvin!! I might use one of these when i finally nag DP into having another baby.
DPs name is Juke, thats what attracted me in the first place. He doesn't like unusual names as he has one an says when he was younger he never got away with anything as there was only one Juke. An he gets fed up being called Duke/Luke.
We have a William, Kieran an i got my way with Jaxon grin

ElBombero Mon 07-Oct-13 21:57:39

Onestepcloser what an amazing unusual lovely name. What do you think? What's been reactions throughout your life? Really unique what's the story behind it?

mrsmartin1984 Mon 07-Oct-13 21:59:56

I gave my daughter an old fashioned name, an unusual spelling and an old fashioned middle name. But she is the only Silvia around. She is unique. I hated my old name because it's so common, and I got mixed up with all the other children with the same name.

sonlypuppyfat Mon 07-Oct-13 22:08:39

Point taken

WorrySighWorrySigh Mon 07-Oct-13 22:10:00

Sonny is your son.

My DS has an unusual name (the name has only been used less than a dozen times since DS was born). It is his name, that is all. I couldnt imagine having used a different name.

Thank you, Ive never had negative comments, at school I cant remember ever being teased about it, although I was teased for my surname! Everyone I meet loves it (I know a few little Lovedays now,2 friends have used it, I feel honoured).

No ones every shortened it, but sometimes I turn round when someone shouts Love.

I feel a bit embarrassed that Ive given both my DCs Classic anti MN Names.

5madthings Mon 07-Oct-13 22:13:24

Sonny is a lovely name, it was on our list.

I know two little Sonny's, both gorgeous.

Its not that unusual.

Look, if you are still not sure, just change it.

If you really loved the name unconditionally, those comments would not have deterred you. Not ONE bit.

Change his name to something you think will suit him better.

I would not have called my son sonny. Sonny is a nick name you can give any son of yours. DH calls our son Sonny sometimes, or Sonny-boy!

Being totally honest here as you are clearly looking for opinions.

Mogz Mon 07-Oct-13 22:17:08

My Great Uncle was a Sonny and he was one of the best people in the world. Fact.

BloodiedWellies Mon 07-Oct-13 22:19:23

Dear Lord I love the name Loveday.

I love Sonny. This is my true and honest reaction. You can never please everybody and there will always be some people (aka insensitive asses) who think they have the right to an opinion. What matters is you, your family unit and your son. if YOU love Sonny, then that is the start and the end of it.

We named DC3 a very ordinary, 'boring' name that is so out of fashion that it is not even in the granddad fashion of names. People just screwed their noses up at. But it meant something to us (the name of a beloved family member now deceased). And it suits him so much, and we just rock the name. Now, now he is 3 people go out of their way to say they like it. When he was born people just said 'really? yuck'.

tethersend Mon 07-Oct-13 22:20:26

earlesswonder, she is actually named after Shirley Hughes...

Imagine my delight when Shirley Hughes came on to do a MN web chat, and I was able to tell her I'd named my daughter after her. She was very lovely about it smile

SanityClause Mon 07-Oct-13 22:23:28

I used to know a dentist called Sonny. No high court judges, though! wink

It does not matter HOW many people tell you they know and love a fantastic Sonny. If you are unsure, it wont matter.

In my family we have M.alLvin, Albert, Avie.lle, Theo, (we are not terribly posh, wink you see.

My son has a name that people said "noooo you mustn" we still loved the name. It is a name I even see frequenty here, mentioned as a name people would be really chavvy/crazy/unclassy to call their child.

I honestly dont understand their point. I dont see what is wrong with the name, I love it, and it suits my son perfectly. It really is him.

DanglingChillis Mon 07-Oct-13 22:31:09

I love DD1's name, everyone I know loves DD1's name, she is now at school and other girls tell her she has a cool name (I think I've done well there!). And yet because one midwife mispronounced it when she was a newborn I had wobbles about it for months. I think it was just 'new Mum' wobbles and I certainly don't feel them now.

Your father is being unreasonable, it's your child and you get to choose the name. Not everyone is going to like the same names but Sonny isn't that out there that it deserves such disapproval. If you'd called him Fagbutt fair enough but Sonny is fine.

TigerBabyyy Mon 07-Oct-13 22:34:35

Is Sonny pronounced Sunny?

My dd has an unusual name. Alot of people have said "shes called what?"

My mother hates it. I dont care, shes my daughter and i like the name!

CailinDana Mon 07-Oct-13 22:35:50

Stand up for your son and yourself, say his name proudly and never justify it. He is your boy and no one has the right to belittle you or him. You will face harder tests than this as a parent.

ElBombero Mon 07-Oct-13 22:36:18

Yes pronounced Sunny but as a general rule spelt Sonny.

TigerBabyyy Mon 07-Oct-13 22:40:13

Im a massive fan of rare names.

Dd is called Devon.

I ve never even been to the place. I love it.

ElBombero Mon 07-Oct-13 22:41:43

That's the thing though, I'm not unsure I love his name. It was just everyone else's input that just kept playing on my mind. I need to toughen up n stop being influenced or worrying about other people n their opinions

BloodiedWellies Mon 07-Oct-13 22:43:12

everyone else can go hang. This is your son and your choice.

[I know what you mean though I spent yesterday sobbing about a passing comment some complete ass said about my Dcs)

TigerBabyyy Mon 07-Oct-13 22:43:50

What first attracted you to the name?

lougle Mon 07-Oct-13 22:44:16

DD1 is Millicent. I adore it even now. We call her Millie, which is quite common, but we don't meet any many Millicents.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BloodiedWellies Mon 07-Oct-13 22:47:20

I think Sonny sounds a happy name, if that makes sense.

ElBombero Mon 07-Oct-13 22:57:12

Earles I had that! Charles too, this is cos the particular relative thought me and DH had named him after the boxer Sonny Liston who's real name is Charles. many have said he needs a "proper name"

ElBombero Mon 07-Oct-13 22:58:21

I think it sounds cool and happy, cheeky chappy type name. grin

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

monniemae Mon 07-Oct-13 23:15:12

Sonny is lovely.

But I'm following with interest as having my own wobble over 2wk old DD name. It's unusual and foreign so no one can pronounce it or spell it. It totally suits her, more than her back up middle name, but I wince guiltily every time I have to spell / pronounce it...

My family love it though (less so her dad 's). Don't think I'd change it in your situation where they didn't!

If you love it still, hold tight, everyone will get used to it and you will relax about it hopefully?

allchik Sun 13-Oct-13 09:27:55

I think its nice to have a name thats not shared by loadsa people. My daughters called Eleni,I LOVE the name but people do often say it wrong...Eleeni for example.
Sonny is unusual but not wacky,stuff what others think x

peachactiviaminge Sun 13-Oct-13 09:34:55

That's a very sweet name! Conjure images of a lovely smiley little boy. I love the less popular names at least there won't be several of him in his class. DS is Talon constantly mistaken for Callum.

Morgause Sun 13-Oct-13 09:35:46

If you are still unsure and he isn't registered yet call him another name but refer to him as Sonny. My cousin has always been known by a nickname, despite being registered in another name.

Or give him a more traditional middle name so he can use that if he grows to hate Sonny.

When he's in his 50s he may not feel comfortable being called Sonny.

usualsuspect Sun 13-Oct-13 09:40:38

Sonny is a great name, I wouldn't change it because other people didn't like it.

It's not even an unusual name, I know 2 boys called Sonny.

lljkk Sun 13-Oct-13 11:06:13

Sonny isn't that out there. I wouldn't choose it (too fluffy for me) but not bizarre.
DS has a similarly unusual name (other 3 DC have very boring common names). People do mispell & mistake it for something else all the time.

ihearttc Sun 13-Oct-13 12:41:32

I think its a fab name! My DS1 has a completely "normal" and dare I say boring name but I really don't like it. He is 8 now and it actually doesn't suit him at all.

However DS2 has an equally "normal" name but I love it and it really suits him!

Go with whatever you want to and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

nkf Sun 13-Oct-13 12:44:32

It sounds like a nickname to me, but if you like it. Why the wobble? People's reactions?

ElBombero Sun 13-Oct-13 13:09:56

Yep peoples reactions. Wish I'd of sounded it out abit before hand then I would of been prepared.
It's ok, he's registered. He'll grow into his name and I'll learn to love it again because it's his.
Where people get off telling a very new mum they don't agree with her personal decisions I don't know. It hurt so bad at the time and really dented mine and my dads relationship.

nkf Sun 13-Oct-13 15:36:22

People shouldn't comment. It's very rude. Always amazes me that people do.

fairylightsintheautumn Sun 13-Oct-13 19:39:03

the only problem I have is when the names are so odd that you don't remember them - an acquaintance of mine has a very unusually named daughter (something Gaelic,despite having no Gaelic heritage) and I just CANNOT remember it form one meeting to the next and after you've asked a couple of times it seems rude to ask again!

Oh how sad for you, Sonny is a lovely name. I named my DD Xanthe and my mum made no secret of the fact that she disapproved. She visited me after I'd had her in hospital and on seeing her cot label said in a flat voice, oh, you've called her Xanthe then. Not, congratulations, or anything. I was livid. She didn't use her name for a long time, just called her baby.

When DD was about 1 she apologised, of sorts, said she had come to love it and couldn't imagine her being called anything else. I am very glad that I (well, we) stuck to our guns.

ElBombero Sun 13-Oct-13 21:54:24

Aw lady, sorry you've had I go through the same but glad I har someone to share my pain with. Did you relationship suffer? My dad said his name for the first time after a month of him being born.

Oriunda Mon 14-Oct-13 07:15:54

My son's name is loathed/thought pretentious or 'try hard' (whatever that means) by the mumsnet majority and loved by only a select few. I really don't care though. I love it (DH chose it, not me, as a fait accompli when DS was born) so don't give a monkey's what others think. DS totally rocks the name.

I think that's the difference between really loving a name or not. If you are bothered by people's reactions, maybe you don't love it enough.

Does Sonny have a mn that is more classic you'd be happy using? Have you already registered the name? If you are still not sure, then consider changing the name and having Sonny as a mn?

Chunkamatic Mon 14-Oct-13 07:40:16

My DS2 is called Sonny. At 3.6 he is a happy, cheeky, vivacious little scamp!
Although I didn't have the problems with family you describe (they know better than to cross me!) I have had my share if wobbles over the name, mainly because of it being a nickname by origin.
My DS1 has a name which is rarer but I have felt more confident about from the start. Doesn't help now that we have moved from London to a small northern village where all the kids are called Charlie or Jack, my two really stick out!
DP on the other hand is less conscious of what others think and his conviction helps me realise that I should stand by mine. My DS's totally work their names and I'm quite sure I'm the only one who gives it that much thought!
Enjoy your little Sonny

Yes, it did affect our relationship, and it has been slow to recover but probably due to other issues too, or perhaps we weren't as close as I'd previously thought. But we are three years on now and I don't think about it at all, I'm not sure at what point it felt completely better iykwim.

bellamysbride Mon 14-Oct-13 22:21:37

My Mum really disliked out DS's name. It's pretty unusual but not chosen for that reason. She had the good grace not to mention it at the time. She now loves it. I felt quite self conscious about it initially as it felt a bit try hard. I don't feel that way at all now and I am so glad we used it. DD has a very lovely but dull name and I wish we had been a little more imaginative .

DismemberedDwerf Mon 14-Oct-13 22:34:55

Everytime I see the name Sonny I think of the Paul Simon song lyric: Sonny gets sunnier day by day by day I like it grin

dd1 has an unusual name, it's a non-standard spelling of an unusual name in itself. or a feminisation of a male name that's not common. (If you're curious pm me). I did have a wobble which is why it's not quite the name I'd picked out for her at birth (blame my mother for that). The original name meant 'my child'. This spelling changed it to 'harmony'. A joke, she'd have been more aptly named Hurricane!

But I liked it, and I cannot imagine her being called anything else.

UniS Mon 14-Oct-13 23:05:46

I know an 8 year old sonny.

Famzilla Tue 15-Oct-13 22:40:18

I just don't get why people think it's ok to tell a new mum they don't like their new babies name. DD has a 'nice' name ( not top 50 but nothing special) and some of DP's family actually said they didn't like it and we're going to call her something different.

I just sat there with my mouth open for minutes before I could finally whimper "but that's not her name.. "

ElBombero Tue 15-Oct-13 23:11:52

Just got the Paul Simon song, lovely. He's actually of my dads favourite artists. Will have to mention it next time I see him, whenever that will be hmm

ElBombero Tue 15-Oct-13 23:15:07

That awful famzilla. I felt so so sad when they did this to me. How dare they? Not sure I will ever forgive hem for putting me through it to be honest, of course we'll move on but I'll never forget those comments and subsequent absence.

youaremychocolatecake Thu 17-Oct-13 00:04:33

You are never ever going to be able to please everyone. If you choose something ordinary like jack some people will think it's boring if you choose something wild like tinky winky ;) other people will think you're daft. What maters is that you like it. I don't even know where I plucked my sons name from. It's fairly ordinary and wasn't ticked off in any of my baby books but he just didn't look like any of the names I had in my head and after about 2 weeks of being nameless I just panic chose. This time I have names chosen already and he/we isn't here yet x

RiotBecky Tue 29-Oct-13 00:38:49

called my ds Indiana, it's uncommon enough for people to say it's unusual but well known enough for people to be able to spell it!! my nanna at first said she was going to call him Dan instead, and oh's mum nagged him before he was born to change it. I'm glad we stuck to it cos he is an Indiana now, he even suits Indy.

AnyFuckerWillDo Tue 29-Oct-13 04:47:44

Riot superb name. What did your parents say? Have you ever wobbled?

RiotBecky Tue 29-Oct-13 09:56:12

I massively wobbled before he was born, oh chose it as a tribute to a friend who has passed, and every time someone asked me if we had any names chosen I'd immediately try and justify it by saying 'there's a story behind it!!'

RiotBecky Tue 29-Oct-13 09:57:10

my mum never voiced an opinion before he was born, she knows it's my choice at the end of the day, and now he's born she says she loves it and that he is an Indiana grin

Lilyve Tue 29-Oct-13 17:31:51

Sorry to jump on the band wagon late but had to post as I'm having the same weird wobble now! I called my little boy Ernest - Ernie for short and I keep thinking "what have I done?! Is this really cruel?" My mum and my dh's mum don't like it at all but I'm hoping it'll become normal after a while!

AnyFuckerWillDo Tue 29-Oct-13 19:30:38

Awww lily, I'm getting more and more used to it and hoping before long it'll just feel natural but I do worry everyone is secretly sniggering behind my back. My other names were Ben or George. Keep thinking of id of just chose something normal I wouldn't have all this worry. But on the other hand I'm sure I'd be kicking myself for not being braver...

EverythingUnderControl Tue 29-Oct-13 20:02:59

I think it takes a while for a baby to 'become' the name they have. It can't mean them until their little personality takes possession of it and then the name and the person become inextricably linked in eveyone's mind. Until then it sounds like a name with no reference.

Of course that takes a while because it takes a little time for a personality to shine through until the baby grows.

If you liked the name enough to give it to your baby, just wait for him to fill it out with all the things that'll mean him alone.

All my dc have uncommon names. They're not unheard of names, just uncommon. Ds especially. Mil would only ever call him by his middle name for the first few weeks after he was born claiming she kept 'forgetting'hmm. I ignored it. She looked ridiculous in the end. I didn't care what she thought.

As has been said just say it's his name and sound positive and upbeat about it. Don't justify it or sound wobbly or others will pick up on it and question it too whereas they won't give it a thought negatively if you're not. It's a great name and importantly your choice.

It's nice to be original too. At school it's great to be the only one (or in a minority) with a name. Better than being in a class with lots of others with the same name. Ds loves his and we've had no teasingsmile

Thurlow Tue 29-Oct-13 20:12:38

We've not had great feedback about DD's name. It's 5 syllables long and a variant on a classic name and the name of a city, MN sin there and we've had a lot of "that's a mouthful" comments. We actually use the shortened version every day, which I don't think is enormously common for girls at the moment, some people see as a boys name, and some people see as a bit 80s - but not in a good way. So all round I think there are a lot of people who don't like it.

But as other posters say - it's now her name, and she rocks it. The tomboy name really suits her.

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