At what age should I allow my daughter to get her ears pierced?

(34 Posts)
GreeenFingers Tue 04-Dec-12 00:01:14

My daughter is 6 and has been begging me to get her ears pierced for over a year. I think it is a "right of passage" and not to be done on a whim. That said she is a very clever little girl, who knows her own mind. I've told her to wait untill she's 8 and then I'll consider it. Am I being unreasonable?. TBO I'd have them done sooner, but I want her to appreciate the fact they are going to hurt nad may take some time to heal. Your thoughts please.

ThreeWheelsGood Tue 04-Dec-12 00:04:31

I'd say as a treat in secondary school but maybe I'm old fashioned! 8 seems way too young to me.

fortyplus Tue 04-Dec-12 00:04:36

12

CointreauVersial Tue 04-Dec-12 00:04:57

Don't do it until she is old enough to look after the piercings and make sure they don't become infected etc.

DD1 waited until starting senior school (11).

Six is too young to be wearing jewellery in my opinion (but you know your own child).

ZenNudist Tue 04-Dec-12 00:05:30

Another vote for 12 or 13 earliest.

GreeenFingers Tue 04-Dec-12 00:11:59

I was 11, my sister 6. I think she needs to "beg" for a while longer to really appreciate them.Her earlobes are tiny (as are mine) I don't want the holes to end up too high or too low. We've tried magnetic earrings but they were pretty useless. I alow her to wear make up on non school days, just lip gloss etc, and see no harm in that. She's still a little girl who likes her dolls and sylvanian friends.

weegiemum Tue 04-Dec-12 00:22:16

My dd1 got hers done at the end of p5 - she was 10. Last in the class!

Dd2 got hers done last wednesday on her 9th birthday. She's had a disability (hip condition) for years, and we saw the doc that day who said she's going to be fine! So as a treat, we took her to get them done, she's been begging!!

She's been brilliant, cleaning them 3x a day with her solution, never had to be reminded, taping them (with micropore) for gym at school.

I'm glad we did it cos it has made me the best mum EVER

TheCatInTheHairnet Tue 04-Dec-12 00:27:03

DD had them done recently. She's 9 and was also last in the class. I had always said I would wait until she was 13, but here it seems to be the 9-11 year old girls who are actually having fun with earrings. They want to go to Claire's and buy the fun little studs and talk about what earrings they want, etc. I kind of thought it was a shame for her to miss out on that just because of some principle I inherited from my Mum!

I think they have to be old enough to take care of the piercing and understand what that involves. Other than that, they're her ears, not mine!

NewNames Tue 04-Dec-12 00:30:58

I was 13 but my mum had originally said 16.

2kidsintow Tue 04-Dec-12 00:36:45

My DD wanted hers done at 7. We took her to a piercing place and made her watch someone else having theirs done. It put her off.

She then wanted it done again when she was 8. We did let her have them done. She was very careful about not touching them and keeping them clean.

NatashaBee Tue 04-Dec-12 00:40:07

When she's old enough to look after them and maybe put up with a little bit of pain and discomfort when cleaning/twisting them/ changing earrings.

Fairyegg Tue 04-Dec-12 00:50:29

I was 12, have already decided no earlier than 10 for dd. 8 seems quite young to be able to care for them herself.

TheCatInTheHairnet Tue 04-Dec-12 00:51:08

I also told DD that she had to know that it was the aftercare that would probably hurt the most. I explained a billion times that she wouldn't be allowed to make a fuss about it at all. This was all part of her being "old enough".

ripsishere Tue 04-Dec-12 00:56:07

My DD was six IIRC. She had them done in Claires holding a teddy. She had no problems with them at all. I don't' think she cleaned them more than three times and then we left the bottle of cleaning gear somewhere.

Pyrrah Tue 04-Dec-12 15:18:34

My parents said 16 - partly because my father spent a lot of time sewing little girls ears back together where earrings had ripped out whilst playing, or pulling jumpers off etc.

I have told DD she has to wait till she is 16 - in reality I will see what the situation is with the girls in her class at school when she starts at secondary school and if the majority have them then she can too.

I wouldn't agree to them in primary school.

Pyrrah Tue 04-Dec-12 15:21:48

The other thing to consider is whether your DD will actually be able to wear 'fun' earrings. My mother, both my sisters and I are all allergic to anything other than gold or platinum. Silver earrings or surgical steel earrings would mess my ears up really badly in just a couple of hours.

So I never had the cutesy earrings other people did as it was expensive buying gold ones.

givemeaclue Tue 04-Dec-12 15:24:08

8

RatherBeOnThePiste Tue 04-Dec-12 15:25:51

DD was 13, she possibly was the last, lots had it done between primary and secondary. She can hardly wear them though because of all the sport she does.

TheJoyfulChristmasJumper Tue 04-Dec-12 15:28:53

My parents made me wait until I was 16. (I now have multiple holes in each ear, a nose piercing and tattoos - not sure if that's as a direct result or not! grin).

DH and have decided that 10 is the youngest we will allow the DCs to have their ears pierced.

And I wouldn't allow make-up at that age either OP but perhaps that's just me.

I was 13. The summer before I started high school (and had to take them out every day).

Re young DC my main thought on the subject is I want my DD's to be free to be children for as long as possible - with all the rough & tumble & games etc that that involves. I want them to be able to climb and pounce and jump and fall without fear of damaging themselves due to earrings. I do not understand people who get babies and young children's ears pierced - mainly for this reason. To me it is like stealing a bit of childhood freedom.

When you play contact sports, for example, earrings & other jewellery is traditionally removed so you aren't injured or don't injure anyone else.

So for my DD's my minimum age will be around 13 - if they want to do it that is (I imagine they will but who knows - I do have several female friends who have never pierced their ears)

GoodKingWenSOLOslas Tue 04-Dec-12 15:36:39

I was 7. My Dd is almost 6 and has been asking for over a year now too. I said maybe when she's 7, but I think she looks gorgeous without earrings and would gladly wait until she's older. The only other thing for me is that it seems to be that all the women in my (mums side) family who have never had pierced ears have very long ear lobes which I find a bit cringey and of course this could just be a coincidence, but still <shudders>.

charlieandlola Tue 04-Dec-12 15:39:14

Hoists bosom, Les Dawson style, dons judgy pants and waits..

Mooook Tue 04-Dec-12 15:43:06

The first day of the summer holidays between primary and secondary school. It's a right of passage and it must be that day or it's wrong! wink

3b1g Tue 04-Dec-12 15:47:03

DD is 8, I'm thinking of letting her have her ears pierced (if she wants to) for her 11th birthday. This would be at the end of the summer term in Y6, so she'd have the summer holidays to get into the habit of doing the after-care, before starting secondary school.
I don't want her ears pierced any younger than this because she still plays in a very active way and playfights with her brothers, so I would worry about injury.
I don't want to make her wait too long, as I'm already quite strict about clothes and will be about make-up, so I want to give her some lee-way on the ear-piercing, which I'm less get up about than I am about the other things.

AfterEightMintyy Tue 04-Dec-12 15:48:31

My dd had hers done this year just before starting at secondary school.

I was around 8 or 9 when I got mine done. DD1 is almost 4 and is already asking. I have told her she can have them done on her 8th birthday. Not that that makes any sense to her at all.

booklava Tue 04-Dec-12 15:54:28

I always said to my DD1 she had to be 16 but then gave in and she had them done the summer holidays when she was 13 she is now 16 and has 7 piercings in her ears and her belly button possibly a reaction to being made to wait as she has had them all done except the 1st since she left secondary school!

PearlyWhites Tue 04-Dec-12 16:31:48

My eldest two dd were 3 ( both requested it) and my youngest dd will get hers pierced when she is 3 if she wants them done.

cq Tue 04-Dec-12 16:39:40

Holy crap, 3??? Because they requested it?? Like they request chocolate for every meal and a pony for Christmas. Not sure my DD even knew what pierced ears were at 3.

She's getting them pierced for her 12th birthday. And I still feel that's early but running out of ideas for what to get her.

PolterGoose Tue 04-Dec-12 18:46:54

I had my first ear piercings at 7 and then second holes at 11. My mum comes from a culture where ears are pierced at birth so it was never a huge issue in our family.

My only advice is to use a proper piercing salon, not Clare's. The piercing guns can cause serious harm and the studs they use are crap.

Between primary school and secondary school. My DD tried 'begging' but it didn't get her anywhere.

PearlyWhites Tue 04-Dec-12 19:57:15

Earrings are not an expensive gift ie pony or unhealthy ie chocolate and of course I wanted them to have it done I think it looks cute.

ImperialSantaKnickers Tue 04-Dec-12 20:04:03

The summer holidays is the only time off school long enough to get through the settling in stage when the new earrings should not be removed without falling foul of PE teachers.

Children with earrings in primary uniforms in this area tend to get the judgey pants look on the streets.

DowntonSprouts Tue 04-Dec-12 20:12:27

DD is 10 and has been asking for a couple of years. I keep telling her 12 in the hope that she'll forget about it but I imagine sometime in the next 12 months I will cave in. They are not allowed to wear earrings at her current school so we have been able to use that excuse so far.

I'm afraid I think earrings on small children are awful.

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