Back in the Zoo for new adventures with old friends

(1000 Posts)
CaptainNemo Tue 13-Dec-11 16:25:20

Come on over animals, I think we'll be very comfy here smile

BuddhaBellyXmasBaubles Tue 13-Dec-11 17:57:27

Buddha pokes head around door and decides she likes this new home. But nemo where's the comfy chairs and home baked goods??? wink

mibbes been thinking about you lots but a little unsure like others of what to say now so hopefully when you lurk next time we can raise a smile with our babble and banter instead smile
moomin can't believe it took you that long to get the app slow coach
cake don't like shortening it to seldom! So what's next for you with the lupus? You did say they could help if I remember rightly with preventing mc? Will you go for it or have you decided not too after all you've been through?
mummy how's the list going wink

Come on animals, where are you?

Mibbes- Let us know how you're doing xxx

Oooo nice new enclosure for us animalsgrin <<puts tray of chocolate orange cupcakes on felled log table>>

nemo the lupus is just managed with meds now (aspirin and painkillers) and I have a 25% chance of carrying to term so we are just taking our chances without contraception but not 'trying' iyswim I doubt my sanity could take much more of a beating tbh

mibbes I hope you are physically doing ok, I know emotionally things will doubtless be sketchy at the minute xx if you need anything let it all out here/Facebook etc xxx

<<<<waves>>>> to bhudda and moomin xx

Turkelton Tue 13-Dec-11 22:15:52

<<<<plonks self down on a chair and takes a yummy orange cupcake>>>>

Mibbes Don't really know what to say but am thinking of you and hope you are ok xxxx

Big waves to everyone else, it is insanely hot and sticky here this morning and two little ladies are insisting we go out and play while I try and cling to the aircon , think they are going to win this one smile xxx

Mummylimited Wed 14-Dec-11 01:37:45

Mibbes you are sounding so brave. I can only imagine how you are/will feel. I've been thinking of you a lot. You must've been so relieved to get home to your beautiful E.

Can't find how to switch this to mobile view so will post more on lappy. Woke with a horrid dream. Should be sleeping really. See you tomorrow.

Mummy I had the same problem but then it started to offer me automatically.

Mummylimited Wed 14-Dec-11 12:23:32

Moomin It was offering it to me and then stopped but I have found a little thing to click at the bottom of the page. Much better

Buddha In regards to sleep I am pleased to tell you that it is possible to have a baby that sleeps after having one that doesn't. E found his thumb at about 3mo and started to sleep through for about six weeks, unfortunately his has since gone backwards a bit, but still nothing like N, who used to be awake for hours! E just feeds once/twice and goes straight back to sleep. smile

It feels wrong somehow to be talking about other stuff while Mibbes is having such a horrid time, but just know you're in my thoughts.

CaptainNemo Wed 14-Dec-11 14:02:05

Oh my goodnes, just had the BEST lunch... these grilled with a little bit of olive oil and then homemade egg mayo, tomatoes and cucumber. YUM. Meant to be saving the rest for DH... There may be a slight problem with that.....

Mummy ikwym about talking about other things given what Mibbes is going through at the moment, but I don't think it's the wrong thing to do (although it feels wrong) and hopefully she won't think it's wrong either. As Buddha says, hopefully our pointless babble intelligent conversation will at least provide a distraction for a few minutes, and we're all ready and willing to return to more serious topics.

Mummy am a bit scared about how different 2 children can be, T has been pretty good.... Am pretty sure this one is a boy, all being well we'll find out at the end of Jan. Still not convince all will be well, but just taking one day at a time - what else can we do? Have a scan booked on 29th, partly to check out my cervix as I had to have a horrible procedure thingy done on it a year or so ago to remove some dodgy cells, so it's now about 1cm shorter that it was before and I want to make sure I don't need a stitch like Georgie did...

Not worked since monday, finances absolutely dire atm, but am finding it makes a MASSIVE difference to how I feel. It's almost like I can't really cope with anything else on top of this pg, which is somewhat unfortunate, and also pretty self indulgent I think.... The not working isn't through choice, but I'm nowhere near as unhappy about it as I ought to be, I'm really struggling to concentrate at work and I really notice the massive effect working has on ramping up the sickness..

I had DD at home with me yesterday, with a bad case of the squits - oh the glamour! Poor little thing. Though she was actually fine in herself; she was quite good company. I think I managed to get more done crammed in to the moments when she was playing or sleeping than I have done today when she's at the cm's, will have to keep her home more often!

On that topic I really ought to go and eat DH's lunch do some more work....

Am off out tonight, a group of 4 of us in the village where I live have formed a Ladies' Drinking Society. It's a total sanity saver. Normally we meet at the pub about once a month, or at someone's house. Sometimes we have food but the name will probably give you a clue that eating isn't the main purpose of the group! However 2 of us are preggers atm, (one due on NYE - poor girl!) so the rules have been relaxed a little and tonight we're off for dinner. Am looking forward to it, though suspect I'll be cold, tired and ready for bed by about 9.45! Wish me luck...!

Lots of love to all xx

PS Turk have tried and failed to feel sympathetic for your need for aircon, it's freezing here!! grin

BuddhaBellyXmasBaubles Wed 14-Dec-11 22:30:17

nemo your link didn't work for me but the rest of lunch sounded scrummy smile sounds as if fate is making your decisions for you with work, at the end of the day you have enough stress without adding to it. Maybe once things are more stable and you are feeling more confident you can take on a bit more to help with finances? I take it you've had no more bleeding?
mummy thank you for giving me hope about 2nd dc and sleep grin E sounds like a dream!

I'm convinced I'm starting early menopause confused I've had erratic afs since August and it's starting to worry me a little now we're ttc I know I'm probably not but something odd is definately going on
mibbes still thinking of you sweet hope you're ok or as much as can be x

Every time I see the thread name I think of Same Smile. Just me? Thought so.

Captain Lunch sounds delicious. Did DH go hungry?

Bhudda I'm sure it's not early menopause. Ask GP to do some blood tests to reassure you.

Strange few days here. Mum's been unwell- they think a trapped nerve but it's dragging on and she's in lots of pain. Then my brother called my Mum (hands-free) on his way to work. Was driving along the motorway when he shouted, 'Mum, I'm going to crash'... Loud BANG and line went dead. Mum was beside herself and called me rather than his wife (she had a baby at the end of October and would panic). When I finally got hold of him he said he was okay but had spun during the hail storm and damaged the front, back and side of his car and was facing the wrong way on the motorway. His colleagues had to come and rescue him (he's a police officer) but luckily there was no one else involved and apart from being a little shaken, he was fine. Phew.

Joe's just puked everywhere. He seems fine in himself. Hopefully that's the end of itconfused.

I've finally d/l the MN app. It's not easy to reply because you can't see the messages already posted. Dodgy memory doesn't help.

Oh, I had my blood results yesterday and there were no abnormalities other than slightly low B12. That rules out Lupus and Sarcoid and means no further testing is required. Diagnosis is Fibromyalgia brought on by a lingering virus (caused the Bell's Palsy, Labrynthitis etc.) and combined with my losing my friend, stress of planning the wedding blah blah. Gradually feeling better.
Lots of love to all.

Mibbes If you're reading then please know you've been in my thoughts. Xxx

BuddhaBellyXmasBaubles Thu 15-Dec-11 17:12:09

moomin is that the one with the panda? If so E's not a fan so only seen it once I think. Sounds as if you've had a hectic few days. Hopefully mum will recover soon and thank goodness your brother was ok must have been scary before you got hold of him. Glad you have eventually got a final diagnosis it's been dragging on so long now. Are you doing any physio yet?
nemo did you confess to eating all the lunch?

Just back from doctors with E yet another ear infection in both ears sad did hope we were done with these for a bit but obviously not!

Poor E. Hope he's feeling better soon.

L has appointment with her kidney consultant tomorrow. Snow forecast overnight so that should be fun...

BuddhaBellyXmasBaubles Thu 15-Dec-11 20:22:49

Good luck L for tomorrow smile

gomurray Thu 15-Dec-11 22:04:51

Hey ladies, good to read your chat. It is such a blast from the past to read all of your news smile and Nemo is right, I am more than happy to read your posts and have a wee laugh at your babble - no need at all to feel bad for getting on with life.

Things are going well here actually - forced myself to have some friends round so have opened up and told my 'story' to quite a few people now which has been a great help. This whole horrible situation has had 2 very positive outcomes so far - it has brought DP and I far closer (not that we had any issues, we were just living quite 'separately' sometimes and not communicating as much as we should) and also it has made me realise what amazing friends I have. Not a day goes bu without at least 5-10 texts from well-wishing friends letting me know I am in their thoughts and that they are happy to help out in any way they can. I am so blessed and these people include you lot - it is so lovely that even after all of this time you are all here and care so much - it means a lot to me.
Sadly found out today that one of my lovliest, closest friends has lost her baby too - baby measured 6 weeks at 12 weeks scan - sadly they cannot be sure that baby not viable until 2 weeks so she has to wait for confirmation via a 2nd scan just after xmas sad. She knows the baby has died, so it is just torture having to wait over xmas to find out or miscarry. It just feels like the shit has well and truly hit the fan this week sad.

Anyway, on other subjects LOL at Nemo scoffing all of the yummy lunch ! Sounds like some time off work is just what the doctor ordered. You know better than most that you need to take good care of yourself and your little bubba in there - work can wait.
Turk no sympathy from here either - it is baltic in Scotland !
Moomin what a day you had ! So glad your brother is ok, and I really hope your mum gets better soon. You have really been through the mill these past couple of years, I have followed your progress on FB and often smile when I remember we were once cycle buddies wink. I am so glad you have a complete diagnosis (although I have no idea what it means), at least you can now deal with a known quantity. Your kids are both absolutely gorgeous - I love seeing your photos on FB. Hope L ok tomorrow and snow doesn't mess things up.
Could someone provide me a with a crib sheet (via FB) - am struggling with some of the new names ?...

Thanks everyone else for your thoughts and kind words. Each day things seem easier (I am surprised by how quickly I have seen progress). Don't get me wrong, one message/trigger and I am in floods but for the mostpart I am able to function 'normally' which was not the case earlier in the week. I am quite a logical and rational person - not overly emotional usually - so I think this is just my way of dealing with it. I have been keeping busy while trying not to overdo it.

Look forward to reading your chat ladies and who knows, sometime next year maybe I'll be TTC with you ladies again (well not actually TTC with you, that would be wierd and tricky wink, but YKWIM)

CaptainNemo Thu 15-Dec-11 22:52:27

Murray I love that aftereverything you have been through you are still able to come on here and make us smile! Just brilliant. Am so glad you're doing ok.

Moomin good luck for tomorrow with L, hope the appointment goes well and that the journey getting there and home again isn't too stressful either. So scary about your brother, your poor mum! And poor you! Glad he was ok.

Sorry can't post properly, am actually working tomorrow shock and have been feeling dog rough all day so really need to go to bed now...

Had my 1st mw app today. Was quite stressful but went well in the end. Glad I went.

Does know if the others are likely to show up? I don't think Georgie uses mn any more, does anyone know about CriCri and those other 2 reprobates whose nicknames I've temporarily forgotten? Am with Murray on the need for a crib sheet!

One last thing. DH is working until 3pm on sat. I have a friend coming over at 2pm but until then it's just me and DD. Has anyone got any top entertainment ideas for an active 2 YO and her nauseas (sp?!) mummy? Preferably something that won't entail me being cold for too long, though am not doing soft play, too many germs this close to christmas! (Though am aware of how pathetic that sounds!)

night animals xx

I just can't get used to not calling you Mibbes. It's too difficult grin.
Thanks for posting. I've been worrying about you lots. You did a brave but very important thing seeing friends. Xxx

Captain Hope work goes well. I suggest a day of DVDs with T. It is Christmas wink.

No snow! Think the LOs are disappointed but should make our hospital trip easier.

I'm going out with a group of mums from school tonight. Should be fun (providing J's stopped being sick by then!

Turkelton Fri 16-Dec-11 07:43:55

Gomurray Great to hear from you, you are still in my thoughts here, glad to hear you are doing ok xxxx

Nemo Messy painting normally does the job with my two delinquents darlings. Tends to be the messier the better, I normally stick on a disposable table cloth, sponges, paint, water, mess and more mess grin Glad the mw appointment went well and hope the sickness gets better soon.

Budda Feeling your pain with E's ear infection, A is the sufferer in this house though hasn't had one in ages and is now making up for it with a real nasty bugger of a one sad Nil by mouth for 3 days - not good. Though thankfully she is on the mend (hopefully) now. Hope E is feeling much better in time for Santa smile

Moomin Wow - sounds like a very eventful few days for you! Glad to hear your brother is ok, can't imagine what an awful fright you must have gotten. Hope your mam recovers soon. Glad to hear you are on the mend too oh and hope Joe is ok xxx

Cake Good to hear the lupus is under control. Fingers crossed everything goes well for you now smile

Am not going to mention the heat at all wink Twin 1 is out playing in the garden, twin 2 has turned into a telly addict this last few days.

Mummylimited Sat 17-Dec-11 07:23:38

We had an interesting Friday evening. N stood up on one of our kitchen stools & fell off onto our tiled floor. Made a horrid yelping noise and wasnt settling. Off to A&E where they x-rayed him, but can't tell if it's broken. So, he's in plaster until we go to Fracture clinic on Monday. sad

He's been a trooper but had an awkward & unsettled night. Sofa time & Father Christmas today.

Nemo I was totally knackered & sick for the first few months of my last pg, so totally understand. If Dvd's are tolerated I'd go with that. We started films at about that stage. I always felt guilty but think its just the beginning of having to think about 2 instead of 1.

Gomurray You sound as if you're doing really well. Veering between sadness & normality sounds totally healthy to me. So glad that it has bought some positives with it. So sad for your friend too. Hopefully you can support each other.

I also need a crib sheet

I'm not feeling very clever today. Drank too much wine and now paying for it. Bleugh!

BuddhaBellyXmasBaubles Sat 17-Dec-11 20:59:53

moomin snap as you know I've been suffering too! Red wine = ouchy head grin
mummy poor N although the pic on FB looks like he's not too bothered!
nemo what did you decide to do with T after?

BuddhaBellyXmasBaubles Sat 17-Dec-11 21:05:55

murray thanks for letting us know how you're getting on. Glad to hear you have opened up to some of your friends it sounds like you have a good support network which is invaluable at times like these x
turkleton E's ears are better thanks how are things in your household?

Murray Have have you been since you last posted? X

It's so cold this morning. L is in school until tomorrow but D has broken up. Think I'd prefer it the other way roundgrin.

Mummylimited How is lovely little N? Let us know how you get on today

Nemo How has your weekend been? Hope you're not feeling too unwell and have found some time to rest!

Bhudda Did you have a two day hangover??
Turk Really jealous of your sunshine right now. Maybe you could just send it this way for an hour?

Sorry for so many posts. You can't any previous posts with the app so I have to keep going back and reading...

BuddhaBellyXmasBaubles Mon 19-Dec-11 15:50:56

moonin I agree the app is a bit of a pain that you cant see previous posts and obviously your memory is as good as mine winkgrin Just a one day hangover for me, what about you?
Mummy I see from fb poor N has a broken arm sad poor little sausage. Is he being very brave?
Nemo how was Saturday?

Turkelton Mon 19-Dec-11 21:29:54

Murray thinking of you, hope things are as ok as they can be xxx
Moomin How is the hangover grin Oh I wish I could swap all this sun for a little bit of cold right now, t'is not naturally having an xmas tree up in this weather shock
Budda A is much better, back to her bossy little self, for such a small person she is unbelievably bossy! Hope is E is on the mend now and all set for Santa grin
Mummy Seen on fb here too, hope N is ok xxx
Nemo Hope the sickness is behaving itself smile

All is quiet here really.DH is really feeling homesick and would love to go home sad so we are looking at a possible move back in 18 months. My deadline is that we are settled and decided before the twinlets start preschool (hard to believe that is in 20 months!) Very torn here at the minute as well over weather or not to ttc #3. Obviously if we are not staying put here might be better to wait until we are home, a bit hard to think that rationally when the broodiness takes over though.

Hi ladies grin

murray lovely to see you here xx I hope you are doing as well as you say xx keep posting xx

moomin glad the lupus tests came back normal x are the drs goin to retest the B12? Pernicious anaemia can cause the same/similar kind of drained feeling and you would need it monitoring. Hope you are ok smile

mummylimited poor E!! Hope he is ok (saw your FB updated before) boys eh!

nemo sorry you are still suffering the sickness x I made some lovely jam jar lanterns with S the other day! Took about an hour to do one so do 2 grin it is just a jam jar, washed out. Glitter glue and little Xmas confetti bits/ pics cut out of wrapping paper. I gave S a paint brush and sat her at the table and left her to it grin I know T will need a bit more supervision but it's not too tasking so you could sit back and let her make a bit glittery mess and then a nice long bath grin

turk I'm not jealous at all of your beautiful not me wink hope A is feeling better xx

bhudda aww hope your E gets better soon x

hi to everyone I haven't mentioned directly...this app doesn't help those with ye olde seive Braine syndrome!!blush

SeldomSantasBaby Mon 19-Dec-11 23:41:54

dya like my new festive name? grin

BuddhaBellyXmasBaubles Tue 20-Dec-11 18:04:53

SeldomSantasBaby very impressed grin

SeldomSantasBaby Thu 22-Dec-11 01:31:36

Thanks <<twirls red skirt with fluffy white trim>> I have made puff pastry mince pies and Xmas pud truffles for us all... They're on the log table grin

Mummylimited Thu 22-Dec-11 06:54:50

Thanks for all the well wishes for N. Hopefully he will only have the cast on for 3 weeks and luckily a friend of ours is an arm/hand specialist at the hospital so he has had a look at the x-rays for us.

A broken arm is not slowing him down AT ALL, although he is a bit more highly strung & whiney about stuff so deep breaths all round.

Turk Sorry that you're feeling homesick. How long has it been now? Maybe you at OH will feel better after Christmas.

Murray Hope you're doing OK?

Hello to everyone else

Must dash as supposed to be on-line to renew library books - oops

CaptainNemo Thu 22-Dec-11 22:31:10

Hi, just dropping in to say sorry for not posting. Although I did post on sunday via the app but my stupid phone said it lost connection when I went to post it and deleted the sodding thing...

It was a pretty moany post tbh, so my phone may have done you a favour. I started a headache at about 4pm on saturday and it just got worse and worse and lasted until monday afternoon sad Spent the entire day in bed on sunday, felt like my head was in a vice. Took paracetamol and codeine (was desperate!) but it didn't even touch it. Very annoyingly sleeping made it worse, when I woke up it felt like my head was going to crack open. Was awake from 1.30am onwards on monday morning, not pleasant!!

Anyway. Better now. But been over doing it I think so sickness now back in force. Marvellous.

Will stop moaning now, sorry!

Is everyone looking forward to christmas?

Murray how are you doing?

Mummy how is N getting on with his cast? Such awful timing! Though I suppose at least there are plently of things around to distract him at this time of year... Hope that's helping!

SantasBaby what a lovely outfit! You look GOR-JUS! Is S massively excited about christmas? I'm enjoting the fact that T's now starting to understand what it's all about but isn't yet at the stage where she's likely to be so excited about it she'll be up at 4am! I suspect that may change in a few years' time though...!

Buddha how's the hangover? Long gone by now I hope! Or replaced by several new ones since then? You party animal wink How are you feeling about the whole TTC lark at the mo?

Moomin you're no better! Have you been leading Buddha astray?!? What's L getting for christmas this year?

Turk I'm sorry to hear about the homesickness, it must be especially bad at this time of year... Do you think it's something it'll pass or will you just have to wait and see? Will you be seeing any family over christmas?

Sorry fopr the rubbish post, am feeling totally crap... But not working tomorrow so planning a lazy morning while T's at the childminders so get up to full fighting strength for the weekend! Night all xx

BuddhaBellyXmasBaubles Sat 24-Dec-11 07:37:57

Happy Christmas Eve ladies
nemo sorry to hear you've been so poorly especially on top of the ever present sickness too sad Did you enjoy your quality "me" time while T was at nursery?
Murray how are you sweets?
Mummy Is Santa going to sign N's cast wink

Thankfully hangover had gone by 3pm hmm good job I only go out about twice a year grin I'm hoping not too get too frazzled today and intend not to get stressed out until at least noon!!

In case I don't get on again I'll wish you all a Merry Christmas smile

CaptainNemo Sun 25-Dec-11 09:12:55

Happy Christmas animals!! Hope you all have a lovely day! 9.09am and STILL haven't opened stocking presents.... Waiting for (D)H to get back from church..... I know that's what Christmas is all about an' all but reeeeeeally!!!! T being much more patient than me! Ah well, at least we all still have it to look forward to I guess!
Just heard my sister's friend FINALLY had her baby at 8.25 last night, was induced as 15 days late, poor girl!! But all good now, what a Christmas present! grin

Lots of love to all grin grin xx

Merry Christmas animals!
Presents have been opened here and L has taken hers to her room. I probably won't see her again today wink.
Have lots of fun. Xx

BuddhaBellyXmasBaubles Sun 25-Dec-11 14:47:55

Happy Christmas my lovely ladies hope you and your loved ones are having a fantastic day smile
I've temporarily snuck away from the madness and considering a nap wink

SeldomSantasBaby Sun 25-Dec-11 17:05:17

Hi ladiessmile I hope everyone has had a lovely Christmas day xxx

Mine has not been too merrysad my lovely grandad died at 3am todaysadsad DH and I have kept the news from Sian today and plan to tell her tomorrow/tuesday so she gets to have a lovely day. I'm glad to say she hasn't noticed anything amiss or if she has she hasn't said anything.

I'm at a loss as to what to do for my dad who is devastated but I suppose being with him will be ok until we are able to help with the practical side of things.

Speak soon xx

So sorry to hear this sad. Today must have been do hard for you. How old was he? Had he been poorly?
Just be there for your dad. Having you all around him will be a huge comfort. Lots of love xxx

BuddhaBellyXmasBaubles Sun 25-Dec-11 20:32:55

Seldom So sorry to hear about your grandad sad sad news at this time of year always seem worse than at any other time. Like Moomin said just being there for your Dad is the best thing x

CaptainNemo Sun 25-Dec-11 21:13:52

So sorry to hear your sad news Seldom, such a dificult thing to have to deal with at any time of year, but especially at the moment, and especially today sad Sending much love to you and your family, it must have been so hard keeping it from S today but I'm sure you did the right thing. Hope the next few days go as well as they can, be kind to yourself sad

SeldomSantasBaby Mon 26-Dec-11 15:37:05

Thanks ladies xxsad

CaptainNemo Thu 29-Dec-11 08:17:03

Aargghhhh!! Am SO pissed off with the FECKING USELESS mumsnet app, yet again I've just written a long message which then deleted itself when I tried to post it and yet again I haven't got time to do another one now.... Grrr..... Back later xx

BuddhaBellyXmasBaubles Thu 29-Dec-11 16:09:02

Have you tried copying the text in case you lose it? Just a thought please don't throw your phone at me grin

CaptainNemo Thu 29-Dec-11 21:01:23

I know Buddha - I'm not sure who I'm most angry with, me or mumsnet!

Well I finally have some good news for you all, although you haven't had the build up to it seeing as you didn't get my message this morning, but.......

It's a boy!! grin

Am quite terrified though, I have absolutely no idea what to do with a blue one.... But needless to say DH is delighted, and I know MIL will be too, currently she has 7 granddaughters and no grandsons!

Impala Thu 29-Dec-11 21:30:45

Well hello fellow animals! Impala (aka CriCri) here. I was browsing MN and spotted this thread so immediately had a read through. Wow, so much has happened! First of all, congratulations to Nemo for No. 2, that is brilliant news grin When is your EDD? Sorry, you must have mentioned it somewhere on the thread but I missed it blush
Sorry to hear the sad news from Murray and Seldom. Seldom really sorry about your granddad, what a horrible thing to happen at Christmas. Obviously there is never a good time, but at this time of year it's even worse sad Thinking of you and your family x
Murray Sorry to hear about your mc (I assume it was a mc?) In your last post you sounded very positive, hope that is still the case.
Turkelton I've been following all your news on FB, it sounds like you've really settled in in Oz and are enjoying a great lifestyle. Is it the huge distance from home which is making the homesickness worse for your DP? Has he managed to make friends there? It must be hard to contemplate coming back in 18 months' time having decided to make the move originally. It's not quite the same, but DH and I moved to Holland nearly 6 years ago now and we ended up staying there just a year for various reasons, even though we had planned to stay for longer. You have to do what is right for you at the end of the day. The only thing I can say is that living abroad even for a short period of time does change you, things are never quite the same when you do come back.
I also need a crib sheet because I'm struggling to remember who is who!
All OK here, still struggling to get my head round the fact that E is three! Where has the time gone?? No plans for No. 2, she's going to be an only. DH and I have thoroughly enjoyed the adventure so far, but neither of us is desperate to go through it again. I think I could persuade him if I really wanted to, but I have no burning desire tbh. We're no spring chickens for a start - he's 48 next year and I'm turning 40 (can't believe that either!). I spend most of my time worn out as it is, really don't think I could cope with a second one. We're still having sleeping problems - she wakes once most nights and I either end up going to sleep with her (she's in a double bed) or she'll come into our bed - but it's much better than it was. She doesn't have a nap any more either so is usually in bed and asleep by 6.45 pm at the latest grin At least we have our evenings back!
We had a great Christmas, but it just seemed to be over so quickly! All that build-up and it was over in a flash. Still, E thoroughly enjoyed it and was completely spoiled.
Will try to keep up with this thread, but forgive me in advance if I disappear for days at a time. I work in the evenings and if I have lots on I don't get chance to even read MN, let alone post! I should download the MN app but it sounds more trouble than it's worth from the various comments on here, especially from Nemo
Happy new year everybody!

BuddhaBelly Fri 30-Dec-11 13:22:32

Nemo Welcome to a whole world of blue trouble grin wink mmwwaahhhh grin Is T quite chilled out and easy going if so you could be in for a shock! But how brilliant one of each flavour such good news! Oh and look out for nappy changes much messier with a boy tinkling everywhere wink
Impala How lovely to see you again! Loving the FB photo's of E she has grown soooo much.
As far as crib sheet goes
moomin is sparkly
mummylimited is TeeHee
gomurray is Mibbes
Buddha is MollyMooMa
Turkleton is
SeldomSeenCakes is EI
Forgive me if I've forgotten anyone that is posting with us now

murray How are you feeling my lovely?
Moomin How is J's sleeping? Still improved?

Hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas? New year will be quiet for me as DH does some door work in the evenings now and is working so E and I are going to Mum and Dads instead.
I'm OVing at the moment, so we've had a busy few days wink will be on the 2WW shortly so look out for manic symptom spotting and feel free to slap me at any point!

I hate this app. It's absolutely shite. Maybe we should start a thread and suggest improvements to tech support.
I want to be able to see people's posts, see how many posts there are to establish if there is news and I want to flip the thread. Not a happy moonin.

Christmas was pretty uneventful. The kids loved it, had too many presents and my clothes seem to have shrunk... Not getting on brilliantly with DH. The spark seems to have gone out. Not really sure how to play it... I'll post more when I have time.

Nemo Woohoo. A blue one. I love having a daughter but I LOVE having a son. Boys are so cwtchy and yummy. You're going to have lots of fun! Thrilled for you.

Bhudda J's sleep is improving slowly. He's settling himself in the evening (but still calls out for me) and during the night he's probably waking two or three times. He wet the bed for the first time last night. He was very sad- D said he'd forgotten to take him to the toilet before bed....

Impala It's lovely to have you back and catch up on your news.

Murray Are you lurking? I hope Christmas went smoothly for you.

Ei How are you doing lovely? I keep seeing that you're not sleeping. I hope things settle soon for you. When is the funeral?

Turk Was it strange having Christmas in the heat?

Love to all and a VERY happy new year. Is anyone doing anything special?

Sparky xxx

BuddhaBelly Sat 31-Dec-11 14:46:59

Well lovely ladies I'm so glad we've had a reunion this year and look forward to spending 2012 with you all. Here's to a year filled with more happiness than sadness and bfps (for those that want them)
Happy new year! smile

BuddhaBelly Sat 31-Dec-11 14:48:23

moomin can I add to the list of hates about the app the fact you can't type sideways!!!!

I also hate the active convo tab. When I click back, I don't want to see the top of the page, I want to see the last thread I looked at AND I don't want to see the same thread listed on the following page. ARGH!

Have fun tonight ladies x

BuddhaBelly Sat 31-Dec-11 16:49:02

I've just seen in settings you can flip the messages from newest to oldest and vice versa. Don't you just watch the thread? That way it's always listed in your threads I'm watching? smile

Ah ha well spotted! X

Mummylimited Mon 02-Jan-12 20:40:16

Happy New Year ladies

Trying to be quick as would like to write a blog tonight and frankly I need my bed.

Nemo A boy! How brilliant. Obviously I have no experience with girls but so far my two boys are totally different to one another. If you can get over smaller choices in the clothes department then boys are fab!

Moomin Sorry to hear you're not getting on with DH. I think I'm ready for mine to go back to work. We have been getting on each others nerves the last few days and not really 'clicking' like we usually do. We haven't even started potty training yet. We were going to start over Christmas, but the broken arm put that out of the window.

Seldom So sorry to hear about your Grandad, what an awful time for it to happen too sad

Impala Great to hear from you. Can't believe E is 3, it just goes too quickly doesn't it?

E is in his own room for the first time tonight. He is 7mo. I was in no rush this time as he still wakes at night and no way am I going to sit on a chair feeding at silly o'clock like I did last time. I'm looking forward to getting the bedroom back in the evening though and will probably just have him in with us after he wakes in the night. I am sad though, everything seems much more of a wrench this time. I guess because you understand how quickly it goes and also he seems to whizz past even quicker. I'm sure if he sleeps better I will get over it though!

Will pop in again soon x

gomurray Tue 03-Jan-12 12:31:39

Hello ladies and a big Happy New Year to you all. So good to have reunited grin

Seldom I posted on FB when I saw your sad news - so, so sorry to hear about your grandad. My beloved grannie died in October, so hard sad.

Nemo huge congratulations on boy - how many weeks are you now ? Boys are sooooo cuddly and lovely and I agree that the choice of clothes for them is limited but it mkaes it less complicated dressing them in the morning - no need to consider, tights, cardis, accessories ! I LOVE having a boy so much fun, although exhausting at times too grin

Buddha any symtpoms yet ? I love a good 2ww symptom spot !

Mummy how is E sleeping in his own room ?

Moomin sorry to hear about you and DH - is it just the holidays or has it been for longer than that ?

Thanks for the crib sheet - helps loads. Am getting on fine. Had a lovely Xmas and NY - very relaxing which was just what I needed. Back to work tomorrow which I am dreading as have to face 2 pregnant colleagues (one who is a good friend and due 1 week before I was and the other sits right opposite me and is due 5 weeks after I was - it is her first so she talks about it a LOT). I need to get back to normal though and these things won't just go away so I have to get on with it and face it. I only work Mon-Wed so it is a 1-day week smile
It would appear that DP is happy to TTC again as BD the other day and no effort made to not TTC IYKWIM ! No idea what body is doing in terms of OV etc.. so started temping this morning. Have had EWCM on and off so think body is trying but not actually managing to ov - which is why I've resorted to temping as more accurate. I should really wait until 6 week check but if he is keen then who am I to stop him wink. No news yet of date for 6 week check - Nemo what happens, will they check me out or just give me results of tests, do you know ?...

Anyway, best get on and make some lunch, 'speak' soon xx

SeldomSantasBaby Tue 03-Jan-12 14:35:55

hi ladiessmile

nice to see so many of us heresmile
impala <<waves>> lovely to see you m'dear! 3yo eh? wow that has flown over!!
gomurray good to see you lovely smile you sound nice and relaxed and i hope your TTC goes really well xx
moomin so sorry you are not getting on too well with DH{{{hugs}}} FWIW during the first year me and DH had ALOT of ups and downs and i felt much the same as you got alot better since and we have been married for 4 1/2 years now. you have had alot on your plate in the past 2 years and it isnt surprising that your relationship is suffering/changing as a result. if you need to talk/sound off im here as im sure everyone here are too and you have my number toosmile
bhudda ooo 2WWsmile im pretty sure im on mine at the mo too- though we are not officially TTC any more...a girl can hope thoughgrin
mummyltd hi ladysmile i will have to read this blog of yours one of these dayssmile hope all is ok since N broke his arm!
nemo WOW a boy!! massive congrats to you and your DHsmile have you told T she will have a baby brother yet?

have i missed anyone? if i have <<<waves>>>smile

things are still pretty emotional heresad
my grandads funeral is on friday and i am not sure whether to allow S to come or whether she is too young yet. she turns 6 on sunday and has asked if she could come too but doesnt fully realise what a funeral is. i have explained to her but she doesnt understand the emotional side of it i suppose. what do i do? i feel like i shouldnt sheild her but i want to protect her from it too...sad

name-changed againgrin

whoops its Ei/Seldomblush

Impala Tue 03-Jan-12 21:08:39

Happy new year lovely ladies, so pleased to have found you all on here again. FB is great, but you can't really post anything too intimate on there!
Hope you all had a lovely new year and managed to stay up to see in 2012. DH and I were pathetic this year - we were asleep by 11pm! Think it's the prospect of being roused anytime after 6am by a small child which did it wink
Some good news tonight, for the first time E went to sleep on her own, without one of us having to stay with her. This is a big deal for her and she's only done it perhaps once or twice before. She decided she wanted to listen to an audio book rather than a story and fell asleep whilst listening to it, result grin We'll have to see if this continues.
Mummylimited hope E's first night in his own room went well. I can well imagine second time round you try to hang onto every step of DC's progress as you know how quickly it flies by. With PFB it's a journey into the unknown and you end up almost wishing their life away as you look forward to the next stage but with DC2 I guess you know what is coming next so you perhaps appreciate each stage more. As you say, at least you've got your bedroom back in the evenings smile
Gomurray Glad you had a lovely Christmas and new year and that you're doing well. Sounds as though the (unofficial) TTC is going well, fingers crossed for you! Good luck for tomorrow, must be hard to have to deal with two pg colleagues with EDD so close to what yours would have been.
Nomoremarbles Just when I thought I was getting the hang of who is who you go and name change and confuse matters wink Like the name though smile On a more serious subject, it's hard to know what to do for the best with regard to S attending your granddad's funeral. I think if she's expressed the desire to go and has been given sufficient information about what might be involved (although this must be really hard to do) and still wants to then perhaps she should be allowed to go and say her own goodbye. Have you had a look at some of the threads on MN on that subject? There is also some very useful information here: Thinking of you at the moment, it's horrible sad
Moomin Sorry to hear you and DH aren't getting on too well at the moment. FWIW, DH and I also had a rough patch last summer and I also felt as though the spark had gone. We've been married 11 years. It seemed he couldn't do anything right and I felt completely unsupported. He said that he felt as though I was focusing only on E and completely ignoring him hmm Things are better now, although not perfect by any means. From my own point of view I make a real effort to focus on the positives in the relationship, rather than the negatives. Having watched a friend go through a messy divorce has made me grateful for what I do have even if it's not perfect smile Have you and DH managed to talk at all? Hope you can sort things out.
Nemo Have you recovered from the shock of having a boy yet??
Buddha Eagerly awaiting news of any pg symptoms from you wink
Catch up with you all again soon!

CaptainNemo Fri 06-Jan-12 13:11:20

I LOVE LOVE LOVE coming on here and finding lots of messages! grin I'll stop saying it soon, but I'm so glad this thread's up and running again!

Which of you lives closest to me? Because one of you needs to come round here and give me a boot up the backside. I just can't seem to get going today. Am v tired and therefore feeling v sick. Booked the day out to start finish my tax stuff for my accountant, so far.....nada. Sum total of my achievements so far: an extra hour's sleep after DD went to the cm's (DH got her up and gave her bfast while I was being a lazy toad), discovered that the 2 mat suit skirts I ordered are no good - the smaller one is so small I can't get it over my bottom blush and the bigger one is massive. Money well spent there then.... Have unloaded internet grocery shopping and done 2 massive tins of roasted veg to go in a chilli I'll make later but which I'm not at all sure I can face eating.... Go me. hmm

Marbles, or whatever your name is today wink I hope things go as well as they can today and that you get some comfort from the service. What did you decide about S? Such a tricky decision, especially at a time when your emotopns are all over the place anyway sad

Murray glad to hear you had a peaceful christmas, or as peaceful as it could be with a 3YO running around! How did it go back at work on wed? That must have been so so tough for you. I remember how useless I was around pregnant women and how toxic I found them. I hopee the lasy who is so excited about having her first has enough empathy to realise she shouldn't be going on about it in front of you. I know you said you feel like you have to get on with it and face it, but you've been through a lot so don't expect too much of yourself too soon, and it's not unreasonable to expect some sensitivity from your work colleagues so please don't fee you're not entitled to that. I don't think we had a 6 week check. From memory the next thing that happened was that I had appointments in other parts of the hospital for tests on clotting etc just as a precaution, and then we saw the consultant later in the summer once the test results were in. However, it never fails to amaze me how differently things are done in different parts of the country so your care may be totally different. Glad to hear you're both feeling positive about TTC though smile

Buddha come on!!! We want 2ww news!! When will the 2 weeks be up? Though I have always resolved not to (and have meant it) I have always ended up testing ridiculously early for one spurious reason or another and my goodness it makes the 12 weeks last a long time, so it you can be stronger than I can that would probably be a good thing!

Moomin I'm sorrry to hear things aren't great with DH, but given the year you've had in a way I'd be surprised if your relationship wasn't takng the strain a bit. I 'm not saying that to belittle how you're feeling, just because you've been through such an awful time, the cracks are bound to develop somewhere or other, and your marriage is a prime target. How does DH feel about things, have you talked to him about how you're feeling? 2 of the couples in our group of friends have been doing relate/marriage guidance counselling recently and it's amazing how helpful they've found it, it really does seem to have made a massive difference for both of them. Do you think that's something you'd be interested in?

Mummy how's N's arm now? I was trying to work out all the ages of the children on the thread, I think he'll be 3 in april? IIRC he was born on easter monday? Am not loking forward to potty training. I can't decide it T's ready or not but I'm certainly in no rush grin People go on about "missing the window" though don't they... tricky..... How did E get on in his own room? Is it going to become compulsory to have a child whose name begins with an E on this thread?! Think there's you, Impala, Murray, and Buddha all with different E's! What's the address for your blog? Or would you rather link it on fb?

Impala great news that you've seen an improvement in E's sleeping, it's a precious commodity these days! T has generally been a pretty good sleeper and I'm not sure how I'll cope if no2 is a terror...! One of T's cm's also works as a night nanny, so maybe we'll just have to move her in!

I made my first nursery purchase yesterday, finished work later than expected so the cm's had to take T on the school run so I had time to kill before picking her up - so what's a girl to do?!? Bought these for the nursery... they look great actually and they seem to be pretty good quality for the price. so you see, I just had to buy them really! grin

Love to all xx

CaptainNemo Fri 06-Jan-12 13:14:09

PS I have one friend coming round with her newborn this aft (leaving the toddler with her parents), another 2 friends with their toddlers, and another friend with her toddler plus another newborn. And they're all staying for tea. I must be mad...! grin Oh, and all the 2 year olds apart from DD are boys, one of whom is extremely challenging - if I'm not tired now.......

hi ladiessmile

hope everyone is oksmile

nemo how was your afternoon with the babies?envy

impala good news that E is sleeping on her own nowsmile it took sian a while to get to that point too and its nice to get a full night without having to go to the child as she mainly settles herself down and reads her books at night nowsmile

<<<<waves>>>> hi everyone elsesmile

it was my grandads funeral today and we decided against taking S. in the end DH made the decision as he really didnt like the idea that she would either be inconsolablesad or play up throughout the service. it was lovely in the end but brutalsad and i feel settled knowing we gave him a fitting send off.

in other news...S is 6 on sundaysmile this time 6 years ago i was settling down now knowing that at 930am the next day my waters would pop in bedgrin the start of my biggest and best adventure and it makes me a little sad that time is passing so quickly!

**not not nowblush

BuddhaBelly Sat 07-Jan-12 23:14:28

MummyLtd How has E been coping in his own room? Has N still got his plaster on?
gomurray I agree boys are soooo cuddly, friends who have girls say that they aren't half as ready to give up the hugs! How did it go back at work? It's bad enough returning to work to the inevitable questions but having to be so close to pg colleagues sad I agree with Nemo they should be sensitive with regard to their comments etc. You know where we are if you need to offload. Back on the TTC wagon too - no stopping you girl wink
Marbles Glad you feel that you gave your Grandad a good send off smile Happy Birthday to S for tomorrow
Impala Has E continued to sleep on her own or was Tuesday a one off grin I have to say since E's grommet op his sleeping has improved so much, now just got to crack those tantrums hmm
Nemo Love the drawers you've bought for the nursery! With regards to hopes for another sleeper don't they say you'll get an opposite second time around wink that's why I'm going for another so I get a sleeper this time grin Have you started finished your tax yet wink Did you cope with the 101 kids visiting?
Moomin Loved the video of J singing on FB smile

Well AF was due Monday but arrived today, not a surprise as I had no pg symptoms whatsoever sad but on a positive note nowhere near as early as previous AF's so hopefully my cycles are settling down again after a few blips. I've only been doing OPK's so far I think it's time to get the big guns out and order the pre-seed grin

Hi ladiessmile

Hope all is wellgrin

Someone slap me/pin me down... DH and I have been having ALOT of bedroom action of late and I'm now getting a bit optimistic about the possibility of a BFPhmm I should know better... AF isn't due til the weekend and I have tested already hmmhmm it is FAR TOO EARLY!!!! Durrrr!! I need to be shaken out of it... We are not even TTC dammit!! S'pose the urge never really goes...

Turkelton Tue 10-Jan-12 07:23:05

Just passing through quickly, will catch up later properly, but Nomoremarbles Firstly am so sorry to hear about your grandad, hope you and your family are doing ok xxx Secondly, possible BFP!!! Have you gotten a bfp? Am very excited for you and have fingers toes legs arms everything crossed for you!

BuddhaBelly Tue 10-Jan-12 09:14:34

Marbles When is AF due? I think if the urge to have another baby is there it may go dormant but never fully goes away smile

AF is due on saturdayblush so I'm quick off the mark! Like I said I should really know betterblush I haven't had a BFP yet but here's hoping wink

gomurray Tue 10-Jan-12 13:36:47

Ladies hello ! May I just reiterate what Nemo said about how lovely it is to come back to our thread and see loads of chat smile

Nemo Love the drawers, getting all set for a slightly less pink life wink Another bonus with boys is that there are more colours than just blue - girls seem to have almost exclusivley pink stuff (would do my head in !)

Marbles I am glad that the funeral went as well as possible and that you feel more settled now. But what is all this about a potential BFP... exciting !

Buddha so sorry Af came, but glad that you are looking on the bright side. Have you tried temping and looking for EWCM ? Those are my preferred methods of catching the egg wink

Moomin how are things with you ?

Hello to everyone else <waves>

Well back at work - 3rd day and things are getting way easier. First day was awful, I was on the brink of tears all day, terrified someone was going to talk to me/say something to inadvertently upset me. As it turned out only 1 woman said something - she came over and said how good it was to see me back then immediately asked if they found out why it happened ! Potentially a very tricky question shock, however she then went on to explain that her SIL had same at 28 weeks and no reason was given. However, she then went on to explain that she'd had a MC at 12 weeks and how difficult it is, but you need to keep going for the sake of your child etc.... I was borderline but managed to hold it together.
Then yesterday there was fair bit of nonsense around absence records with HR and it meant I spent over an hour messing about trying to sort that and obviously was unable to concentrate on non-baby things so ended up sneaking off to the loo for a wee cry. Then later my manager and I had a meeting where he told me that I could take time off/work from home whenever I needed to as he appreciated it would take time to heal - which was so lovely and nearly set me off again !
Anyway, today is the first day that I feel ok, so each day gets better smile

On the TTC front have had random EWCM but nothing consistent and temp remains low. DP and I are both taking conception supplements (just health food shop ones, nothing scary !) and extra vit C and zinc. Combined with our Jan healthy eating plan and massively reduced alcohol intake I reckon we should be in tip top shape for TTC grin Just need to start actually doing something in the bedroom more frequently !

I'm keeping an eye on you lot but haven't had time to post. Working FT and feeling shattered.
I'll catch up as soon as I get chance but hope there's a BFP (or more) on the cards.
Sending huge love to Murray. X

CaptainNemo Thu 12-Jan-12 19:51:41

OMG sooooo tired... Been working at a court which is a total pain to get to, leaving the house at 0720, getting home at 1800-1845... Only been 2 days but I'm SHATTERED!!

Marbles any sign of af? Keeping everything crossed for you! Though of course, I realise you're not trying wink

How about you Buddha? how are the temps looking?

Murray I'm so sorry you had a tough start back at work, though I guess it would have been something of a miracle if it had all been too easy... Hope you're ok and that wee E is making you smile lots xx

Moomin hope you're not too shattered too, have been watching your gym updates on fb, am v impressed! How are things with DH now? Better I hope... xx

How's everyone else? Sorry am too tired for a better post... Was meant to see MW this aft but had to cancel due to work sad but have managed to re-arrange for tomorrow eve. Am quite anxious to hear the hb as it was around this time we lost Thomas plus am not really feeling movements yet. Have been lurking on the June ante natal thread and the girls on there seem to have been feeling movement for ages... Am 18weeks tomorrow.... Can't imagine what it must be like to actually relax and enjoy a pregnancy, and am still struggling to believe this one will end well, but am hoping that's just paranoia... Time will tell I guess.

Love to all xx

gomurray Thu 12-Jan-12 21:23:16

Nemo good to hear from you, well done managing to post anything at all despite exhaustion ! I can totally understand how you are feeling about PG, I know if I have another PG I will feel exactly the same way. It is torture not feeling movement, but if it makes you feel any better loads of people reassured me before 20 wk scan that they had little or no movement in 2nd PG up to 20 weeks. The girl at work who is due a week before my due date told me this week that she has onlt just started feeling 'proper' movement this week and she is 26 weeks (2nd PG) so please try not to worry too much.
p.s. please remind me of this post when I am at the same stage saying exactly the same thing ! It is all too easy to dish out rational advice when you are on the outside looking in.
Take it easy lovely lady and look after your wee girl and your wee boy smile xx

hi ladiessmile

no AF yet... not really due until sat-mon so trying and failing to not get my hopes up!! i really should n
know better after all that has happened in the last 4 years shouldnt i!!grin

i tested this morning too... my eyes are trying their best to decieve me... it could be the tests too being crap... could swear theres a faint line there thoughhmm dont believe it at all yet so im going to try not to test until monday yeah rightwink

hope everyone else is oksmile

gomurray Thu 12-Jan-12 22:20:13

Oooh Marbles this sounds very promising.... won't get hopes up yet though. Have you had this happen a lot over the 4 years ? It must be tough every month having a vague glimmer of hope even if you are not officially TTC. I'd love to think this is it for you... xx

gomurray Sat 14-Jan-12 19:15:39

Any update Marbles ?

I had a temp dip today and from memory that can mean ov is about to occur... I really hope so as I am not at all patient - it has only been 5 weeks but I want my body to reutrn to normal so that I know I can just get on with the job in hand - fingers crossed.

BuddhaBelly Sat 14-Jan-12 21:16:19

Can't see any previous posts and normally I'll post on laptop but dh fitted a new front door today and whilst taking out old frame cut phone line sad so no Internet ir phone line sad so apologies but can't catch up properly
marbles anything to share?
nemo how you feeling?
gomurray sounds like your body is getting itself ready super quick for ttc wink
moomin have you recovered from your busy week smile

My pre-seed arrived today so we'll be getting jiggy sometime next week! Other than that not much to report really. Off to flick through yellow pages to find someone to repair our phone line as apparently if we call bt it will cost a small fortune! grin

Hello ladies.

Our laptop screen is broken so I'm stuck using my phone....

Murray We had very similar cycles. I always had a dip before ov so it does sound as though something is about to happen. Fingers crossed. How are you feeling?

Marbles Quietly excited for you. Don't leave us hanging.

Bhudda Good news on the pre-seed but not on the phone line. Damn! Hope you can find someone to fix it soon.

Nemo Hope you've had a restful weekend and you're not overdoing it.

Can't see any of the posts whilst replying so apologies to anything i've missed.

Things are still strained here. I've come to the conclusion in my head that I can't make the relationship work. We can easily live in the same house and parent together but our relationship has come to an end.

I don't know who is at fault. I suspect it's a joint disaster. I've always needed love and affection. He's had so much time living alone and just isn't capable of it changing. He says he loves me but has real issues displaying it in the way I need him to. This, amongst other issues has left me with huge feelings of resentment and I couldn't bring myself to be pleasant to him. We had shouting matches, he moved out and then came back. I hated being filled with that much anger.

Neither of us have had the energy to work on the relationship. I'm fed up with feeling so negative all the time. We can parent together so we'll just see how that goes for a while. I think I need to make a decision about whether I need more than a hand with the children in the future but I'm not going to rush myself.

I feel so much happier at the moment. I'm really enjoying work, the kids are great (other than the sleep issue). He hopes we'll be able to work it out but I can't see how he would be suddenly able to give more after eight years of me begging and I don't think I can survive in the relationship as it is.

Rant over. I'm fine, honestly. Probably all sounds very selfish of me. He's a great bloke, a really hands on dad, generous.......
The age gap isn't so much of the issue. I obviously have freaked out moments when I think about the future but I entered the relationship knowing this.

Enough bringing the thread down anyway.

Lots of love to all xx

BuddhaBelly Sun 15-Jan-12 11:18:30

moomin sad for the decisions made but if they are right for you and I know it's been a while coming. You sound quite positive about where you're at for the time being and in control of it all which is the main thing. You know where I am x

gomurray Sun 15-Jan-12 22:39:54

Moomin so, so sorry to hear about your relationship and that you don't feel that it can be fixed sad. You do seem to be quite 'sorted' in your mind that you know it is for the best and I admire your determination to stay together to parent jointly - for the short-term at least. You know we are here to listen, even if you just need to rant/offload. Maybe the thread restarting has come at a good time for you too. Lots of Love xx

p.s. ov didn't happen after all - silly temp playing tricks with me.

moomin just to back up what i have said... so sorry for what is happening xx we are here if you need anything and you have my number toosmile

hope everyone else is oksmile

i got 2 faint but definite bfps...<burys head in sand>

gomurray Mon 16-Jan-12 13:32:35

Moomin how are you today ?

Marbles surely if you have had 2 BFPS (even faint) and no AF then .... you are pregnant !?? Why are you not jumping up and down with joy ?... Has this happened before then ended badly in the past couple of years ? I do recall you had at least 1 chemical pregnancy before. Fingers crossed this is your time smile

Nemo taking it easy I hope. Bought anything else blue wink

My stupid body seems to be trying but failing to ov - I get EWCM every so often but then it disappears and most importantly temp remains low - boooo. I need to learn how to be patient blush

murray I have had 5 CPs and 2 later MCs...this appears to be number 6 but only time will tell...

BuddhaBelly Thu 19-Jan-12 01:51:52

gomurray maybe you need af to settle everything down patience woman wink
marbles <whispers> congrats very quietly as I know this has ended badly so many times for you and this time you're not even ttc officially so must be more of a shock! What makes you think things are going wrong again? sad
nemo how you doing? Still feeling rough ?

Hi ladiessmile

bhudda I have had a lot of spotting and a BFN since my BFPs but I'm trying to keep the optimism while I wait for my body to decide what it's doinghmm no actual red bleeding yet but that's what happened last time and my body kept hold until 9weekssad I need to test again but I'm holding out until tomorrow.

Hope everyone is doing wellsmile

gomurray Thu 19-Jan-12 18:25:30

Aww Marbles sorry to hear BFN and spotting sad, doesn't sound too hopeful after what has happened previously. Is it worth contacting hospital as didn't you say that due to lupus they'd be monitoring you closely if you got PG ?... Maybe there is something they could do to help, keep hormone level up or similar ? Big hugs xx

Buddha I am practising patience - I promise !

Still no sign of ov and EWCM left the building days ago - PITA ! Anyway, having had some very useful advice from Nemo I have decided to wait a bit (see I really am trying to practise being patient !). I'll prob only manage to hold off for 1 cycle but reckon I will wait for 1 period then there will be no stopping me !

It has been a very low week as I found out on Mon when I called the Consultant's PA that my appt to get results from bloods and post-mortem was scheduled for April - I was absolutely gutted as I was due in April - 5 whole months after the event before I get any answers sad. Also, as we plan to go on holiday over the fortnight of my due date I'd prob have had to defer for June. Poor Nemo had the misfortune of texting me on Monday so has been on the receiving end of my 'gutted' texts all week ! However, the good news is after badgering the PA and checking out what could be done privately, I found out this afternoon that I have an appointment with a consultant (on NHS) on 31st Jan - so not long to wait ! It is such a relief not to feel that I am being forced to wait until my due date to get answers. It may be the case that my body takes that long to start ovulating again anyway, but I can't control that...although I am trying my best by taking vitmains and supplements and eating an uber-healthy diet to ensure I am in tip top condition for an old bird wink

Where is everyone hiding ?...

CaptainNemo Sun 22-Jan-12 20:31:12

Hello Murray! I'm here! Am SO glad that your appointment is so soon (relatively speaking), and glad that all the pestering paid off! wink I'm sorry to say I hadn't put 2 and 2 together about your having been due in April sad - all the more reason for them not to keep you hanging on until then. Would you mind telling us what your due date was? I hope you haven't already changed your holiday plans? Going away then sounds like the perfect thing to do. Hope the waiting to TTC doesn't drag too much.... At least you'll have seen the consultant before ttc-ing this way. Hope DP is home safe and sound now. How are things with the pregnant work colleagues? not too awful I hope sad

Oh Marbles.... it's just so unfair that this keeps happening to you, I'm so sorry to hear it sounds like it's happening again.... Will you get in touch with the hospital? I suppose if the worst comes to the worst at least you might be able to have an erpc rather than waiting another 5 weeks (until you would be 9 weeks) for af... But I absolutely appreciate that talking about an erpc as anything other than a worst case scenario is totally shit sad Hope you're ok chick, you've had such an awful lot to cope with since Christmas sad

Buddha how's the phone line? grin I saw the new door on fb though, looks v smart! Clever DH!! Did he really do the whole thing in a weekend? shock How's it going with the pre-seed? wink

Moomin I don't know what to say.... I'm so sad to hear your news..... But I second what the others say about needing to make whatever decisions are right for you. Please know we're all here if there's anything we an do.... xx

How is everyone else?

All ok here, except am totally paranoid about the fact that I'm still not feeling any movement..... Especially as I'm totally out of the closet now, went to a work drinks thing on fri night and it was fairly obvious in the dress I was wearing.... so if things don't work out I'll have to tell eeeeeveryone..... Obv if things don't work out that'll be the least of my worries, but it's preying on my mind.... I feel like I've come so far in some ways, but I'm all too aware how far I still have to go between here and holding a healthy baby in my arms.... Somehow the fact it's a boy makes it even harder to imagine a happy ending.... Gah. What a moaning old cow. Sorry. Scan is on thursday, if the consultant thinks all is well at 20 weeks I'm hoping I'll start to relax a little... BUT SOME MOVEMENT WOULD BE NICE LITTLE ONE, IF YOU'RE LISTENING.......

Hope everyone's had a good weekend xx

gomurray Mon 23-Jan-12 13:21:25

Nemo good to 'see' you and have some activity on the thread again ! My due date was 26th April. Still plan to be away for the second half of April - not booked anything yet as I now have an irrational fear of flying due to that fact that I flew to Munich the weekend around when I lost the baby sad. I haven't plucked up the courage to tell DP this yet as he has his heart set on a sunny holiday - it will only be relevant if am PG by April so may be a moot point anyway !

I totally know how you feel about movement at this stage - I was driving myself insane worrying about lack of movement even though I didn't feel it consistently with E until after 20 weeks due to anterior placenta. I know my story of PG #2 is not a good example to give you hope, but when I expressed my worries to friends LOADS of them had not felt much/any movement until after 20 weeks and they now have healthy babies - all of there examples were 2nd timers too, so please try not to worry. You are obvioulsy going to be more inclined to worry after your past experience but equally you are aware of the rarity of late losses - please remind me of this if in future I am approaching 20 weeks and in a complete panic !

I have come to the conclusion that body stopped trying to ov several days ago, so now hoping it is just a crappy post-MC anovulatory cycle and that AF will arrive soon so that I know where I am cycle-wise, I hate this no-man's land I'm in - no good for a control freak !

Now that appointment is looming I am getting myself prepared for what may be said and what questions I need consultant to answer - esp if they come back with an inconclusive result. My reading so far has suggested that 2nd trimester losses are usually connected to the mother, not the baby ('defects' with baby usually cause a 1st tri loss) - I know this wasn't your experience Nemo but then the consultant was amazed your body held onto James for so long (clearly efficient at being PG - take comfort from that). I have a few 'possible' things that may have caused the baby to die - flying, tummy bug etc... and am torturing myself with these now so I really need to get the results to stop my over-active imagination ! Plus, given that the sonographer said she thought she could see fluid on the brain it is probably a baby issue afterall - just hope it is a 'one-off' thing that is not likely to repeat.

Anyway, me, me, me ! Where is everyone else hiding ?...

Buddha have you been getting busy with the pre-seed or are you in 2ww territory ?...

Marbles how are you feeling ? I spotted you over on one of the MC threads I'd been following - think I'll pop over too and pick the brains of a couple of the ladies who seem to be very well versed in test results for late-MCs.

CaptainNemo Mon 23-Jan-12 20:57:11

Murray Flying is NOT a cause of miscarriage!!!!!! Especially not a tiny little hop over to Munich. Absolutely NO WAY!! Please please don't think that had anything to do with it. No chance. Bet you anything. Even paranoid me flew to turkey when I was pg with T and my MOST paranoid friend (who is a gp) flew to Australia when she was pg. So there. Bet you it was a problem with the baby. Don't forget there's a big difference between a baby dying at 16 weeks and a baby dying at 20 weeks. Your body hung on just like mine did.
PS James is DH, and it's not just the consultant who's amazed I've put up with him for so long!! grin

gomurray Mon 23-Jan-12 22:38:07

blush Thomas, sorry nemo what an idiot I am, I actually thought when i typed it that it felt wrong but decided it was right in the end !
I consider myself well and truly slapped on the wrists !!!! Point taken, I will try to spend the rest of the week obsessing about finding a fab holiday instead of inventing crazy theories about what happened.
When is your 20 wk scan ? Hopefully that will help calm you down a bit.
Thanks for the virtual slap, it was much required and appreciated !

CaptainNemo Tue 24-Jan-12 13:35:06

No prob, any time you need a slap just give me a shout winkgrin But honestly, your time will be MUCH better spent finding a fab holiday. And Dr Nemo prescribes lots of sun!!

Scan on thurs, 2pm. Can't come quickly enough! Seeing the accountant tomorrow eve to find out the bad news about my tax bill. [terror] Last year I actually cried in his office when he told me how much I owed (thought I had a reasonable idea, thought I had enough put by. Wrong on both counts!) So am hoping it'll go better than that this year - although that's a pretty low bar! xx

Come on Other Animals!! Where are you hiding???

I'm here. Lurking lots but not finding time to post and computer still isn't fixed. Another week of work after this week and then things should settle down.
Ei Please pop in to let us know how you are.
Murray I'm so glad your appointment has been moved forward. I so hope you get some answers. Keep talking.
I'm sure you won't be waiting too long to ov. Are you still temping? Get some preseed!
Nemo Hope you're not over doing it. Good luck with the accountant. Fingers crossed for good news.

And Nemo - sending you lots of luck for Thurs. Not that you'll need it xx

evening ladiessmile

it looks like i have had yet another CP(hmm) but my body appears to be having other ideas... despite the bleeding and BFN etc i appear to be having symptoms that if i didnt know better i would swear were pregnancy symptomshmm MASSIVE sore tingly boobs, heartburn as bad as with DD, low stretchy/niggley pains, dizzy spells, nausea (gagging when brushing teeth etc) and feeling very drained. i and steadfastly REFUSING to test for now but keeping an eye out incase anything else pops up...

hope everyone is ok smile

nemo good luck with your consultant apptsmile i have a friend who is currently baking #4envy who never feels movement until past 20 weekssmile try not to worry too much if at all humanly possiblewink i think you(and that beautiful boy in there) will be finesmile

moomin how are things with you and DH? hope all is starting to settle a little xx

bhudda hows the TTC going? lots of preseed amd SWI i am guessingwink i have a feeling you will be our next BFP m'deargrin

murray hope you are ok and not freaking out too much about the appointment <holds hand> like was said on the other thread- whatever is said at the appointment is likely to be a shock and very hard to take in so write down your questions to ask and lean on us as much as you need to xx

<<waves>> to anyone not mentioned smile

frazzlerock Wed 25-Jan-12 13:28:58

It's been so long I couldn't even remember my name shock
It's also been so long, a few of you have either changed your names or we have some "new" recruits...??!!
I might have a quick read over the last few pages to refresh myself but if I could be filled in with the latest gossip I'd be mucho obligio.

I've come back to the comforts of The Zoo as I've missed you all loads and feel completely out of the loop now. I have a fair bit of gossip my end for those who aren't FB addicts. Nowt exciting mind hmm Just boys. Silly silly boys.... <sigh> oh and loads of running (which makes me smile)

God I've missed you lot. Can I just give you all one big manly bear hug?

gomurray Wed 25-Jan-12 13:52:38

FFS !!! I have just posted a lengthy bit of chat which has disappeared into the ether - grrrrr.

However, while I was typing frazzle returned - hellooooooo ! So good to 'see' you grin - I have followed your news on FB but obviously don't know any detail, so spill. And I am super-impressed with your running - I haven't run since I was PG with E - <lazy emoticon>. There is a crib sheet further down with new names - that should help you.

Ok so back to my chat - in brief it was as follows:

Moomin good to see you and hope you are doing ok - how are things with DH ?

Marbles so sorry things are so confused for you. If it is a CP is it worth reporting to hospital ? What about baby asprin, have you tied that ? Lots of ladies who suffer from early MC and CPs swear by it.

Buddha are you on 2ww ? Good news for you that Marbles predicted a BFP - do you all remember when she used to have dreams and had an uncanny ability to predict things ? She predicted my BFP wth E !

Nemo totally understand your comment a few posts back about feeling more uneasy about PG because it is a boy again - I am convinced PG2 was a girl and already am wishing that any future PG is a boy to give me a better chance of reaching full term.

I am starting to think that I need to steel myself big time for appt on Tuesday as being told the sex will make it more real that I have lost a baby (either DD/DS and E's brother/sister) as opposed to 'just' losing a baby/pregnancy. I am thinking that no matter what the results tell us, it is going to bring a lot of emotions flooding back and have implications for how/if I approach any future PG.

As far as my stupid body goes, after CM drying up for about 10 days and expecting AF any day, I now have EWCM again (I think) plus zero spotting (I have always been a 5-days spotter !) grrrr just want AF so I have a starting point and can get on with it.

Where are Turtle, Buddha and MummyLtd hiding out ? come back !!!!

CaptainNemo Wed 25-Jan-12 14:30:48

Welll helloooooo everyone! And hello Frazzle - I wasn't sure who you were til you mentioned the running/boys grin Am so glad you found us! There are no new recruits (not allowed!) and as Murray said I think there's a crib sheet somewhere... But:
Murray mibbes
Turtle now lives in Oz with her twin girls
Buddha used to be named after you in RL (or her cat...)
MummyLtd likes a good laugh, tee heee....
Impala Cri
Moomin is very sparkly
And think Marbles is still getting called Ei so hopefully you'll work that one out!
And I'm a woman of mystery wink

Not got much time now but can I share my TOTAL paranoia of the day? If someone would come and give me a slap that would be marvellous.... Although tis a bit embarrassing actually..... Was out last night, ate at the pub with friends and by the time I waas about to go to sleep I was feeling really sick, different from normal preg sick. I then woke at about 0040 with bad stomach ache, but was definitely higher up than LO so not too worried and just tried to go back to sleep. Think was mild food poisoning. Bloody pub. Got up to shower at about 6.45. Had shaved pits, but not legs [nice]. suddenly saw blood dripping onto the floor of the shower, bight red and quite frequent drops, nearly had heart failure. Couldn't feel anything so panicked even more as normally when you're bleeding and can't feel it, it's only coming from one place... Got straight out of the shower and then realised it was coming from my right nipple blush so went immediately from panic about mc to panic about breast cancer................ Ran off to find DH who had a look and reckons I'd nicked just under my nipple with my razor during aforementioned shaving.... Totally wasn't aware of it if I did, though boobs are unusually large and therefore getting in the way much more than I'm used to at the moment so I suppose it's possible, but it really freaked me out. Cut was under nipple so I can't really see it. i have a drs appt booked on 1st feb so guess will just ask then but wanted to see what you guys thought. What an idiot huh?!!? V stressful start to stressful day methinks... Nxx

frazzlerock Wed 25-Jan-12 14:39:03

Oh god, I'm such a lamo. I've been reading through and cannot take it all in. All the name changes have lost me completely. I think I'm going to have to start from here.
moomin you like how I asked you who pickledmoomin was? What a duffbag!

Murray I was really saddened to read about your MC. I had absolutely no idea until now. You seem to be keeping upbeat which is really good. I'll be thinking of you on Tuesday x

Nemo Congratulations for your lickle BOY! One of each, you lucky thing you. I bet little T is getting so grown-up now!
I'd love to get us all together again soon if we can..?

My news is pretty rubbish really. Just a man zapping all the life out of me and making me feel like I've hit rock bottom. Nothing compared to the shit most people have to go through. Feel a bit of a fraud really.
Basically, after a year of emotional turmoil - one minute he wants us to be back together, the next he wants nothing to do with me (this happened a stupid number of times) - I decided to make a massive step by telling him exactly what I thought of him and not to contact me again. I then removed him from FB and Twitter. Been struggling immensely since sad. I was diagnosed with severe depression last March and it was him who put me there. Desperately hoping not to go back there but can feel it all starting again.
I feel so pathetic telling you all this. I sound like a heartbroken teenager! Keep telling myself how ridiculous it is and today I'm a bit brighter.
That's kind of why I came here. I know you guys will put me on the straight and narrow and get me to buck my ideas up!
I feel like I've lost touch with you all which makes me pretty sad as you've all been there for me throughout my PCOS TTC months/years.

On a positive note, I've got my Brighton Half marathon in 3.5 weeks time and have signed up for Bristol and Cardiff later on in the year. Moomin you might have a lodger for Cardiff...
I'm also heading off to Borneo and Kuala Lumpur for 10 nights on 12th April SANS ENFANTS!! I can't friggin wait. I'm completely burnt out atm childwise if I'm completely honest. Desperate for this break.

Still not got the ball rolling for the divorce but once I've worked how how the blazes to start, I'll get right onto it. It's still the best decision I've ever made. Apart from deleting the latest tosspot from my life of course...

Right, I will definitely be back later today. Gotta go and pick up C from school then I've got a babysitter coming over so I can go for a run (it's an expensive hobby!)
Cheerio guys. It really is so amazing to be back grin

frazzle grin lovely to 'see' yougrin sorry things have been roughsad I have tried to keep up on FB but didn't manage to obvblush glad to see you backsmile
Il catch up properly later as I'm on th bushmm should be home soon thank fuckwink

Mwah Mwah.
I love that we are all back grin

frazzlerock Wed 25-Jan-12 21:08:26

Evenin' all!
I'm just back from my run and now have my feet up and embracing my sugar habit yet again. I've no idea why I'm doing this as I weighed myself at the gym and I've put on a good half a stone. Bloody useless scales. Clearly they're wrong! Ahem...

Anywho... Nemo Crikey woman! That's enough to put the bejeezus into anyone! Shaving your nipples indeed. That'll learn yer wink

Marbles man alive! I'd love to know what's going on with your bod. Don't you wish sometimes you could press a button and see what the hell is going on?! Keep us posted though won't you?
I've actually had to do a few preg tests myself over the last few days. Thanks to that moron Sam the Spam Potatohead (that is his real name). I would have loved to be able to take a look inside my tummy. Ridiculous thought considering the TTC I've had to do in the past! I do seem to have these weird phantom pregnancies after jiggery pokery with him, quite odd. My wonderful mind playing tricks on me! I keep forgetting that it won't happen again, if I know what's good for me .... hmm

Moomin Yay!

I tell you what, that run did me a world of good. I find it amazing what exercise does to my emotional state. I wish I could do it everyday. Better than any anti-depressant!

My sister just text. My Mum's in hospital with a bad stomach ache. She had to go in yesterday as she was in agony the night before. She came out with the diagnoses of IBS and a urinary infection but was in agony again today. Gawd knows what's going on. Waiting to hear news from my sis...

Turkelton Thu 26-Jan-12 06:53:09

G'day everyone!

Great to see so many of us back on here, big waves to Frazzle smile

Nemo Ouch! can well imagine the fright you must have gotten too

Marbles So sorry this is happening to you again sad Hope you are ok xxx

Budda How is the ttc going?

Dh and I have decided we are going to go again shock and start ttc again. Going in to docs tomorrow to get my implant contraception thingy removed from my arm - we must be mad!

Hello to everyone else, its Australia day here today so we are off out to a bbq smile will catch up properly tomorrow

frazzlerock Thu 26-Jan-12 13:51:13

Afternoon, yep I'm back again! Just thought I'd keep you all updated on my mundane life...

Had a mega dream I was back in Bristol with Sam Spamhead, so woke up very sad but then saw I had a long but lovely lovely message from his best friend (a girl who I've since become friends with). It was just what I needed. She knows what he's like and completely understands how I feel and really stuck up for me and said all the right things, which made me cry... but happy tears smile
I feel so lucky as all my friends have been really rallying around me. I still can't believe it's affected me so much. Feels like grieving in a way. This is a lot worse than when I split from the ex, but then I had a choice then and it came to a natural end. This time it didn't and I had no choice but to cut him out when I really didn't want to.
God, I'm boring myself so much with all this bollocks, bleeuugghh! Shurrup now woman! AArrrrghhh!!

Spent the morning at Jitterbugs Play cafe in Wimbledon, having a good old chinwag with my mum buddies then came back for luncheon. Gotta go off to the GP for 2nd attempt at verucca removal (noice!) a bit later.

Mum's still in hospital awaiting ultrasound results...

Has anyone had a go at the Timeline on FB? I didn't like it last week but I'm warming to the idea now. Think I might just give it a whirl....

Turkleton Yay to TTC again! How exciting!!! Let the madness commence! wink A very Happy Australia Day to you!

Right, I'm off to check out this timeline thingiebob. I have 40 minutes to kill, stay asleep little people, stay asleep....

frazzle sad sounds like spam wasn't exactly prince charming. It really is like grieving when a relationship ends for whatever reasonsad I remember pining after the boyfriend I had who impregnated me when I had MC%231 he treated me like shite, cheated on me and messed me around but I loved him and he was firmly inside my head for months and months afterwardssad it's awfulsad {{{hugs}}}

Oooo turk TTC again? Excellentgrin loads of luck xx

gomurray Fri 27-Jan-12 09:09:18

Nemo where are you ? Please update us on scan, I am getting worried xx

BuddhaBelly Fri 27-Jan-12 23:52:39

Just in case your still worried all is ok with nemo I'm sure she'll be along to update soon. Back fir a catch up tomorrow smile

CaptainNemo Sat 28-Jan-12 23:22:55

So sorry not posted, scan great but ms back with a vengeance (at over 20weeks FFS!?!?!) and really struggling. (D)H in bad books as was "too busy" to come to the scan angrysad but luckily my lovely sister took the afternoon off work and came instead. So much appreciated. Consultant was v reassuring, and baby still DEF a boy! Said if I'm not feeling movement it's a perception issue rather than anything to do with the baby, apparently he's a right wriggler, which is exactly what I needed to hear.
Sorry for the me me me post and sorry to keep you all hanging, promise will be back when I can. Suspect I would feel a lot better if I could actually sleep hmm but prob too much to ask for the next year or so!!
Ps finally outed myself on fb tonight, so I guess now it's official grin

Murray will be thinking of you on Tuesday lovely. Will be tough but it's an important step forward on this tough old road. You'll get there lovely, I have every faith xx

frazzlerock Sun 29-Jan-12 09:46:38

Nemo Fantastic news! Your DH needs a kick in the shins mind angry And why are you apologising for the "me me me" post? You dafty! If we're not allowed to do that then I'd better delete my past couple of posts! Sorry your MS is back. That sucks.

We're just off to see Cars 2. Bloody hate those stupid damned films but I need to kill time with the scamps. Ex H coming over later to watch them so I can go for a run. Feeling gross at the moment. Nasty case of biscuitoverindulgence lately. 3 more weeks until Brighton half and I cannae fricken wait! grin


nemo gringreat news for the scansmile crap about the MS thoughhmmget some ginger ale in youwink

frazzle hope you are feeling bettersmile I would love to do a marathon but I fear I would die horriblygrin

Hope everyone else is ok (where are you allll!? How very dare you all have liveswink)

I'm still in limbo here but trying to ignore itblush I'm waiting for more tests to arrive and have booked myself in to see the GP on 9th feb to talk it throughsmile DH is convinced there is someone in there (my uterus) and will not let me do ANYTHINGgrin so at least I'm getting a rest even if there's no one living in my bodysmile every cloud eh...

frazzlerock Sun 29-Jan-12 17:59:45

Marbles rest all you can missy! Take full advantage. I would. I do hope your GP can help you this time. Why the hell have they left you so long ffs!
Never know, maybe your DH is right.... (!!!)

I've had an interesting couple of days. A friend of a mutual friend of Spam and I got in contact with me explaining how she's also been fooled by him and so have a few others. Same lines and everything! Seems he's a repeat serial offender. Should've guessed really!
I'm now plotting sweet revenge..... I think that man needs to be taught a lesson. I'm thinking something along the lines of that Lily Allen Smile video. Scratching up his records (he's a hip hop DJ) and spiking his tea with laxatives.... Now THAT would be so very funny but, unfortunately, impossible to pull off.

Where is everyone?
Nemo is clearly too busy with her head over the toilet wink but the rest of you have no excuse!
Please come and entertain me!

gomurray Sun 29-Jan-12 20:15:42

YIPPPPEEEEEE for successful scan nemo i was really worried when you dared not to report back pronto ! not impressed by dh though I really hope he had a bloody good excuse
how is ms that is rotten luck that it had returned but on the bright side at least you feel really pg
keyboard playing up hence no punctuation
will type more when at work as cannot be bothered fighting with this crappy machine>
dreading consultant appt but want to know results very mixed feeling about it

Impala Sun 29-Jan-12 21:15:32

Sorry I haven't posted in ages, but I have been keeping up with all the news!
Nemo Hurrah for a successful scan and a boy smile Shame on (D)H not coming along to the scan with you though angry that's really not on after everything you've been through! Sorry to hear about ms being back, hope it goes away soon. I found ginger nut biscuits a great help for ms, if not for my waistline, when pg. And those travel sickness bands too. Hope the meeting with the accountant went OK. I'm also self-employed and totally empathise with being hit with a massive tax bill. It happened to me a couple of years ago and I'm still paying back my mum the money she loaned me blush
Frazzle Lovely to have you back my dear, so sorry to hear about the crap year you've had. It sounds as though you're definitely better off without Spam, but it will probably take a while to get him out of your system. Love the plans for wreaking revenge grin How was Cars 2? Very impressed with all the running and your dedication, well done you. Totally agree that exercise is the best form of anti-depressant too.
GoMurray Good luck for Tuesday, can well imagine you have mixed feelings about it. Will be thinking of you.
Marbles Keeping fingers crossed for you and hope you get some answers from tests and GP. Milk DH's helpfulness for all it's worth and rest up smile
Turkelton Yay on deciding to ttc again smile Hope having the implant thing removed wasn't too painful. Best of luck, hoping for some good news very soon!
Buddha How is ttc going? Keeping fingers crossed for you too!
Moomin Really sorry to hear about how things are with your DH sad Hope you're OK.
Mummylimited Hope you're OK and just busy with your two lovely boys smile
All OK here although had a horrid week last week. E had an ear infection at the beginning of the week so we were stuck indoors for 3 days, I was climbing the walls by the end of it! She's also being really difficult at the moment, everything is a constant battle of wills and to be honest I'm getting tired of it. I know some of it is down to her being tired after being ill and being on ABs for the infection, but it really is wearing me down sad Please tell me it's just a phase!
I'd also like to ask you lovely ladies for advice about a situation with my mum which is also getting me down. Basically she just seems to be too busy to be involved with E, at least that's how I perceive it sad She's always been involved in organisations/committees etc. ever since I was a child. When my dad was alive they were heavily into rowing, to the point where they were training several nights a week and every weekend. No problem with that, we still saw them regularly Then when my dad died she threw herself into her various activities (she's an alternative therapist and took on the management of a holistic centre), which again was totally understandable, she wanted to keep herself busy. However, when I had E I (selfishly perhaps) imagined she might want to be involved with her grand-daughter, especially as we live in the same town, she's 10 minutes away. Neither of my grand-mothers lived close to us when I was little, one was in France and the other was 2 hours away, although I did have a good relationship with them, especially my French granny, even though I only saw her 3 or 4 times a year. But seeing as my mum lives so near I had hoped that she and E would see a lot of each other. They have done, to a certain extent, in that my mum comes round several times a week, but I feel as though she's fitting us in around her other commitments most of the time and she'll stay for an hour maximum. Also, if E is tired and not in a great mood (which to be fair happens towards the end of the day when my mum comes round, especially since she dropped her afternoon nap) then she'll start looking at her watch and makes her excuses to go. Fair enough, she has things to do. But since E was born my mum knows how I've struggled at times with lack of sleep and trying to work and she's not ever really offered to help. She's had E to sleep at hers two or three times since she was born. E adores her and would love to stay over more often, but mum is always too busy with one thing and another. She also never takes her anywhere on her own unless I'm away on a training course of working for example. She won't ever offer to take her off my hands for an afternoon say so that I can have a break. I have never asked my mum to help with childcare figuring that E is my child and my responsibility, but when I look around at friends whose mums are very hands on I just feel so sad. Perhaps it's a case of she had her own children and now enjoys her freedom too much? We almost have to make an appointment to see her at times and she seems to be taking on more and more commitments. For example last week, when E was ill and we were stuck at home all week she managed to make time to see us for an hour on Wednesday afternoon and that was it. The previous week she came to watch E swim but didn't stay to actually see her once she'd got out of the pool shock Poor E was distraught when I had to tell her my mum had gone. To make matters worse, she looks after my sister's dog every few months and, strangely, manages to clear her diary when she's got him in order to take him for 2-hour walks every day hmm E and I get even less of a look-in when the dog is around! Odd that she can make time for a dog but not her grand-daughter hmm As I said, E adores her and is always asking when we can see my mum and I'm fed up with having to explain to her that she's busy. Re-reading this I sound like a petulant child, but I'm just sad and disappointed that my mum isn't really involved in E's life. RL friends have suggested that it's my mum that is missing out, which is true, but I wondered if any of you lovely ladies had any words of wisdom and how I could perhaps gently broach the subject with my mum. Trouble is I can feel myself getting angry and upset typing this so I'm not sure I could have a rational discussion with mum. Perhaps write to her? Or am I over-reacting? Help! Sorry for the long post, it's probably not what Frazzle had in mind when she asked us to entertain her wink

CaptainNemo Sun 29-Jan-12 21:52:19

Birdsong. Why do I fecking do it to myself?!?!?


Proper post tomorrow, just thought I'd share that with you all... xx

CaptainNemo Sun 29-Jan-12 22:45:39

Impala just read your post. I could have written it myself. I have no idea what the answer is though I'm afraid, maybe you could come and talk to my mum and I'll go and talk to yours?!? It's almost like my mum is scared of T. She's never stayed there over night, she's never taken her anywhere ever, she's only just 65 but she behaves as though she's in her 80s. She never initiates seeing her or does anything with her apart from watch tv and v small scale in front of the tv type activities. In fairness she sometimes collects her from the cm's for me if I'm working but at most that's 3pm til 5.30 and she won't give her dinner. She's never bathed her and she hardly ever babysits - on occasion my dad has come to babysit without her. Oh, and did I mention that they live next door to us?!?! It's an impossible situation but as far as we 're concerned I can't see anything changing so I don't think there's a lot of point me saying anything. Am worried about how I'll cope if/when we have another baby... DH's mum is in her late 70s but is nevertheless a lot more active than my mum, but (like yours) she's too busy with this group or that meeting, and she lives nearly an hour away. Not how I would have imagined things being if you'd asked me 2 years ago, but there it is. Sorry for lack of words of wisdom, but at least I can empathise. Will try to say something more useful tomorrow xx


I'm going to try and remember everyone but I can't read any posts when replying-silly app. Laptop screen is still broken!

I'm just back from a child free weekend in London. It was lots of fun but it's always lovely to be back with L&J. Went up to stay with my best friend (who is also my ex from before I got together with D.) and his brother. We met up with some friends from school on Friday night and then went to see 'Ghost the Musical' on Saturday before going to a lovely Argentinian restaurant for dinner. It's messed my head up a bit... Whilst I'm pretty sure things won't improve with D, I can't help having thoughts about whether the grass is greener. Spending a weekend together makes me realise how close we are, how much he knows about me in comparison to D. He's a really good looking bloke, very likeable personality, a City job and we share the same interests. Not sure I should be allowing myself to think too much about him. But it didn't work out before, and he has a wonderful life in London with me screwing it all up for him. And the last thing I need is a distraction from finalising things amicably here. I doubt he's interested anyway and I certainly don't need to torture myself with wondering what could be.
Murray I'm sending you do much strength and keeping you in my thoughts. Please know that we are here for you. I hope the appointment brings you some closure. X
Impala Mothers, aye?! My mother isn't very hands on, either. I had no contact with her during my pregnancy with L. She didn't agree with our relationship. And then she didn't meet her granddaughter until she was almost a year old. She'd never come to our house (even though she's now on speaking terms with Dai after 7 years) and would never call to see how we are. She'll look after Joe if I'm working but insists she is paid. She won't take him anywhere other than the shop to buy a paper from my father and so he'll sit in front of the tv. She wouldn't look after them unless I was working. She refused to look after them overnight even on my wedding night. She doesn't work, have friends or hobbies.
Although I often resent the situation, I've learnt that this is simply who she is. She didn't have support with us and it would never occur to her to insist on helping. When I was ill last year (and there were days I couldn't lift my head and was admitted to hospital) I had to find friends to look after the children. She had to go food shopping....
I hope someone can offer advice to help rather than just to feel your pain. And E will settle once she's feeling better.
Nemo I'm so glad all went well at the scan and that you're feeling reassured (for now at least!). angry at DH for not going with you. Do you remember that D didn't come to my 12 week scan? He was busy working, too!
Frazzle I can't say I'm surprised with you recent discovery about Spam. He's not an easy character and his depression certainly wouldn't have helped yours. As I've said before, you're better off this way. You'll eventually look back and be grateful that you made the decision to cut him out. The revenge may help, too grin.

Marbles How are you doing today? When do you plan to test again? I'm do glad DH is looking after you. Can the GP not see you sooner??
Turk Is it out?? Do you think you'll consider clomid again? This news excites me!
Bhudda How's the 2WW treating you? Symptoms, please?
Mummylimited Where are you hiding?

Is that everyone? Kick me if I've forgotten you. It's sleeting here- better than our initial forecast of 10cm of snow.

Love to all x

And Impala, my mother is in her 50s! D's mother is nearly 90 and I can understand why she can't help...

Just thought I'd check in! Remember me!? Hmmmmm?????

hi ladiessmile

moomin im still waiting for tests to arrive but im starting to think its just my body being an arsehole as usualhmm we are now TTC in earnest as we have put a time limit on it of new year...i think 5 years is quite enough heartache and DH agrees so if we dont get a baby by then then we are going to stop TTC.

kat i remember you!! grin dont you have some news to share?wink

frazzle i like your plan for revenge...i would maybe post him some kippersgrin the smellier the bettergrin

hope everyone else is ok todaysmile

frazzlerock Mon 30-Jan-12 13:45:24

Good afternoon lovely ladies.

Impala I wish I could wave a magic wand over your mother but I'm afraid to say, in my experience, some people are just like that.
"Perhaps it's a case of she had her own children and now enjoys her freedom too much" - Hit the nail on the head there sad
It always seems to be one set of grandparents are very hands on and the other not.
Ex H's parents have always been very hands on and very affectionate towards the children whereas my mother is not. She's actually great and will (most of the time) have the boys or one of them if I ever ask but she would never offer and she's certainly not as affectionate as the other GP's.
It's true what your friends have said. She is the one missing out. I know this doesn't help you much. Are DH's parents still around?
BTW, I can sympathise with the constant battle of wills. Jack is ridiculously stubborn. On top of that, he's always causing trouble and making other children cry and is basically like a bull in a china shop at the playgroups. It's awful. We had to storm out of one this morning as he hurt another child (he was warned). I actually wanted to cry. I never thought I'd be the mother of a child everyone was nervous of/disliked. Thankfully for him he has a very cheeky persona which most people think is hilarious so he gets away with murder hmm

Moomin From what you've told me about C, it seems as though he is interested but he's probably a bit confused. It's a very difficult situation as you're such good friends but when you have history it can make things very difficult. If he wanted to, would you ever go back there? How did things end when you were together? Would the same problems arise if you got back together?
I hope you're right about Spam. I can't wait for the day when I don't miss him anymore. sad I'd actually really like him to get back in touch just so I can tell him to eff off but I know I'd eventually give into him so it's far better he doesn't.

Marbles and Buddha What Moomin said! Symptoms please from both of you!

Katturner.... hmmm rings a bellllll..... Nah, it's gone. Who?
<Arf> How are you doing since I last saw you? Fancy a bit of Collywobbling this week or next?

Nemo How's the sickness today? I can't say I ever really had it. Think I'd have freaked right out as I'm completely terrified of throwing up!

Right, just so you know. Not only are they selling Peanut Butter Kitkat Chunkies at my local sweet shop, but M&S are selling chocolate covered pretzles! <dribble> Seriously, this is bad. It's all I can think of. I'm trying my damnedest to get into peak fitness too after putting on nearly half a stone in about three weeks. I wouldn't mind so much if I could just have one bar/bag but I'd have to have about 5 as there's no stopping me once I get started. So bloody selfish of the shops to do something like this. Annoyed much.

Now I've got to respond to an email from my Spam distraction (Let's just call him 'M' for now) and I've no idea what to write. MEN!! It was almost easier being in a shit long term relationship. At least I knew where I stood hmm

FS! I can see the sweet shop from here. I'm sure I can see a bright light beaming from those badass Kitkats....

gomurray Mon 30-Jan-12 13:49:42

Hello ladies !

awww so many ladies with 'not very helpful' mums sad. Impala I hope that fact that you are not alone helps, even though nobody has any answers for you. My mum lives over 200 miles away but still makes the effort to come at least once a month and looks after E on the Monday following the weekend she comes down smile. I know if I lived closer she'd babysit more and take him out but as it is I think she does her bit. DP's mum also does her bit once a month on a Monday and also takes him for overnight stays and helps out when we need it for the odd half day here and there - she lives locally. Clearly I am very lucky.

Moomin your weekend in London sounds fab - I think I quite fancy your BF based on description, sounds lovely !!! but I guess you are right to sort out your current situation before letting your heart wander as well as your eye wink

Marbles what news from you my dear ? Any symptoms/AF ?


Turk what happening with you, are you going back on clomid ? I remember when you got results of how well you'd ov'd after taking clomid and we joked that you were going to fill a people-carrier with babies !

KatTurner - what was your zoo name - I actually recognise your 'real' name but cannot remember who you were MN-wise !

I have been trying to think up questions to ask consultant. I guess questions depend on the results but I don't wan tto walk away and realise that there were a whole host of things I wanetd to ask. Had a long chat with DP about appt at dinner on Sat night (a rare night out thanks to mum and dad babysitting) and we are just going to see what we are told and take it from there - what will be will be.
Body still taking the p!ss out me - random days of EWCM and zero thermal shift sad.

BTW Nemo what did you mean about 'Birdsong' - I haven't watched it but saw a tiny bit last night and it looked good.

murray Lol I can't remember what I went by on mn before, I've been using to promote my childminding of late so using my business name.
....anyone remember?!

marbles I do have news indeed; I'm 22 weeks pregnant with a yellow bundle :0been a bit of a struggle this time around, I shan't bore wi the details yet as I haven't caught up on everyone else's situations.

Frazzle could do my dear! And if you fancy bringing some of that confectionary along I'd be more than happy to taste test :0

Any chance you lovelies would mind filling me in on your current status, kinda like this:

Kat 22 weeks pg no.2 yellow!! EDD 31st May (you know the drill)

BuddhaBelly Mon 30-Jan-12 20:44:40

Sorry for being awol ladies, I seem to have been mega busy but can't actually remember with what hmm confused
gomurray Good luck for tomorrow I will be thinking of you, be strong (not that you seem anything else!) and take your notebook! Any sign of AF yet?
marbles sad what is your poor body doing to your head, this pg/ttc business is such a headf**k. Hope you are still making the most of dh imposed resting? smile We are kind of on a time limit too, although we haven't set a date to stop I am 40 this year so tick tock tick tock grin
Frazzle Hurray I thought we'd lost you to FB and twitter! grin You make me laugh with all the running but still having your mad cravings for all things naughty (including men) So sorry to hear you have meant yet another wrong un as they say, but how good does it feel offloading here? At least you can say you've made a new friend (his best friend) out of this who completely understands what you are going through in RL too. Any more revenge plans? Have you managed to ignore the chunky KitKats!!
nemo Completely inappropriate when you were having a mini meltdown but all I could do was grin at the thought of you cutting your nipple shock I have such images in my head now wink Once again so glad that your scan went well, any names yet? More importantly have you worked out how you can make DH pay yet? wink I had awful MS all the way through, is it just the feeling or are you actually throwing up? I lost a stone off my pre-pregnancy weight due to MS all the way through so it's not all bad wink Just remind me of that if I'm lucky enough to get pg again!
Turkleton Yey another one ttc! grin Lets have a race wink
Impala I fully understand why you feel so annoyed with your Mum's lack of interest, I never get gp's that don't want to be completely and utterly involved but I suppose that's because both sets of mine are pretty good to be honest (although dm is sometimes FAR too involved and telling me what to do!) but I suppose that's better than seeming disinterest. Both sets of parents help us with childcare and my Mum is always giving us a break and having him overnight etc, we are very lucky smile I agree with your friends that say it's her loss, and although E won't have the close relationship you would have liked I'm sure you will more than make up for it and in the future with her children too. I'm very worried that E is having another "stage" I'm hoping Ewan will grow out of his VERY quickly but the tantrums seem never ending so if he has another one at 3 I will be grey and very wrinkly!
moomin So another man in your head hey? Well we can't help the feelings and thoughts that creep in it's just wether we act on them or not. You can't help comparing to D that's only natural, maybe sort things out at home and then see how things lie with C? Maybe take the kids next time if that doesn't put him off nothing will wink
Kat Congratulations, what does I think about a possible brother or sister?

Well if you are still awake after this mammoth post blush apologies it's a bit long! Now on 2 ww AF is due Friday, no symptoms, keep imagining I've got sore (.)(.) but I think it's all in my head hmm although PMT is not bad as it normally is although that's not even probably a symptom!

BuddhaBelly Mon 30-Jan-12 20:46:29

Forgot to put myself on the list

Kat 22 weeks pg no.2 yellow!! EDD 31st May
Buddha Cycle 4 AF due 03/02/12

Not sure what the non pg/ttc people will put on the list? Men? wink

BuddhaBelly Mon 30-Jan-12 20:49:34

Ooh another two possible but probably not symptoms, having problems sleeping and a very vivid dream, in fact it was a bloody nightmare I dreamt I was pg had scan all was well, and then I gave birth to 6 babies!!!! All I did was cry!

CaptainNemo Mon 30-Jan-12 21:06:07

Evening animals. Just settling down to watch our current Love film with DH - How to train your Dragon grin Am sure we shouldn't be watching U certificate (animated) films when it's just the 2 of us! I saw part of it with DD on the ferry to France in September and I quite fancied seeing the rest - saddo? moi?

Kat I'll do you the updated stats if you like. Don't think a list would work as not everyone is TTC/preggers. Hope everyone else doesn't mind, and doesn't object to what I'm about to say about them! BTW I was trying to remember your mn name, I think for a while you were Meeow and before that you were named after your cats, Something and Harry? Or have I got that totally wrong?

Ok, non-list type list:
Nemo 20 weeks pregnant with no 2, blue. EDD allegedly 12th june but I reckon more like 15th/16th.
Frazzle I'm guessing you know about from RL
Marbles is having a v stressful time waiting to see if she is pg with much wanted DC2 or if her body is playing tricks on her and she is actually waiting for (yet) another CP/MC sad. We're all very much hoping it's the former, while being ready with much vodka hand holding if it's the latter.
Impala's lovely daugter E is over 3 already shock, but Impala is ready for her to start catching up on the last 3 years of sleep sometime soon please... ATM she's nor planning on having any more DC.
MummyLtd is kept v busy by her 2 gorgeous boys and her blog (hence the name). I'm not aware of any plans for DC3 but perhaps she'll be along soon to put me straight on that one grin
Murray has a consultant's appointment tomorrow (and needs to take a v bag handbag along with her so we can all fit in it to provide moral support). She was expecting DC2 but very sadly discovered that her baby had died at her 20 week scan appointment in December and had to be induced sad We all wish there was more we could do to help sad but are massively impressed by how well she is doing smile
Moomin and her 2 beautiful DCs are alive and well and living in Wales! Moomin has had a frankly shocking year, and deserves some sort of medal for the fact that she is still functioning. She has been extremely unwell but is hopefully now on the mend and has had a lot of grief to deal with as well. Her DP is now her DH but alll is not well though things are aamicable at the moment.
Turk, her DH and their beautiful twins are now living in Australia! And she's just told us they're going too TTC#3 which is EXTREMELY exciting news!
Buddha is also TTC for a sibling for her gorgeous E, while we nag her for symptoms like the demented supportive ladies we really are grin. She's another one who wouldn't mind a bit more sleep if there's any going...!

Is that everyone? I really hope people don't mind, just thought some of you might not particularly enjoy spelling out what's been happening of late. Feel free to come and write something crass and insensitive about me if I've offended anyone...

Gomurray I meant what I said, I'll be thinking of you tomorrow. I really hope you get the answers you need... I guess for me there would be 3 main topics. 1. the sex of your baby, 2. what happened and why, 3. whether it's likely to happen again in any subsequent pregnancy and if so what they can do to minimise the risks/what monitoring etc you'll be offered. That's obviously only the very briefest of lists, I'm sure the ladies on the mc threads will have come up with something more useful... sad
BTW re Birdsong I just meant that it was so bloomin traumatic watching it. I knew it would be, and yet... Still I watched it..... hmm

Impala have you had any further thoughts about the best way forward with your mum? I'm really sorry not to have had anything more useful to say yesterday...

Moomin glad you had a good time in London, but you're probably right, sounds llike a sure fire way to make an extremely complicated situation even more so... Maybe a good topic for daydreams for now though? You must have been v young when you 2 were together, how long did the relationship last?

Frazzle I haven't lived. I've never had a peanut butter chunky kit kat shock Though given how fat I now am I suppose I may as well start... Went to M&S for yet another bra measuring today, it seems I have gone from a 32B to a 36D and I'm only 20 weeks. Am afraid. Am VERY afraid. It's not the D bit I object to, it's the 36.... sob......

Right. That'll have to do for now. Love to all.

CaptainNemo Mon 30-Jan-12 21:27:38

Buddha cross posted due to my MASSIVE post! Sadly no chance of me losing weight, despite the sickness. Am not acutally being sick, just feeling sick, but nowadays it's than hangover, must eat lots of crap type of sickness if that makes sense... Thanks for the sympathy following my shower trauma btw wink Maybe my bra measuring comments explain why they're getting in the way so much more than I'm used to?!?!?!? Oh dear. Am a MESS!! Please keep us informed with any more symptoms. Can see why you cried about having SIX!!

So did I mention I'm off on a spa day tomorrow? Can't bloomin wait!! Bought it for a friend of mine for her 40th so thought it only right I should go along to keep her company grin though the thought of appearing in public in swimwear without T to hide behind is extremely scary! One at a time please madam......

buddha good symptomsgrin are you going to hold out until friday?wink im still waiting for the tests i ordered over a week ago so i still havent retested...symptoms still strong etc and i had an odd dream last night toohmm i was lying in bed (in my dream) and had a weird feeling in by upper tummy, put my hand on my belly and i had a big baby bump with a wriggly baby in there!! very vivid and i felt rather sad when i woke up. its all i want...

nemo hope the MS eases soon and you get to start to enjoy your pregsmile

<<<<waves>>>> to everyone elsesmile

Impala Mon 30-Jan-12 21:42:22

Thanks for all your lovely messages ladies, it really does help to know that I'm not alone in this situation, I'm just sorry to read that my mother is not the only one when it comes to not being involved with grand-children. Makes me very sad I do wonder why it is? A whole host of complex reasons I guess. Unfortunately MIL is now 85, lives over an hour away and also still has SIL at home with her as she has Down's so she really can't help out at all. And FIL died 5 years ago sad Ironically I think if MIL were younger and lived closer then she would be more involved than my mum. I guess I'm just going to have to accept that this is how things are, enjoy the time she can give to E and stop wishing things were different. I thought I was managing to do this but occasionally it does all get to me again. I do hope that if and when E has children I will be able to help out as much as she needs me to. Although like Buddha I'm 40 this year too so I could be in my mid-70s by then! Do you have any plans for your 40th btw Buddha? I'm thinking of just sloping off somewhere with DH either just the two of us (assuming mum is not too busy to look after E wink) or with E as well. Don't really fancy a big party.
Symptoms sound promising Buddha, fingers crossed for you!
Kat Of course I remember you! Congratulations on your lovely news but sorry to hear it was difficult this time around. Hope the rest of the pg is now all plain sailing to make up for it. How is your little cat doing btw? I remember your posts on FB when he was really ill not so long back, hope he's fit and well again.
Frazzle Sorry you didn't get to go running tonight (saw your post on FB!). Stay away from that chocolate! Sorry Jack is giving you a hard time at the moment too. A friend of mine has a boy whose behaviour was very similar to what you describe when he was the same age. I think unfortunately it is just a phase, this boy is now 4 and is much calmer. With your work I don't suppose you can really avoid playgroups etc. can you? I was going to suggest more physical activities where he can burn off some energy but not sure if that's possible. Is he at pre-school? If so, how does he behave there? It must be really hard for you at times, fingers crossed this phase passes quickly.
Moomin Lovely to "see" you, sounds as though you had a lovely weekend in London smile I would just echo what the lovely ladies here have said, just take things one step at a time and see how things develop. If the reason for your break-up wasn't anything major then no reason why it couldn't work. I'm reading "One Day" atm (haven't finished it yet so nobody spoil it please!) and the couple in the book have just got together after years apart and seeing/being married to other people. Oh and they are "best friends" too wink Why not in real life??
Sorry to hear about your mum not exactly being hands on either sad In particular I'm shock that she didn't look after L and J on your wedding night. It sounds as though you have some wonderful friends though smile
Nemo Thanks for sharing your story about your mum, I was amazed that she doesn't help out when she lives next door, quite unbelievable! You'll cope just fine with another baby, don't worry. You've done a great job with T by the sound of it smile And enjoy the spa day tomorrow btw
GoMurray will be thinking of you tomorrow sad
Marbles Hope you find out one way or another very soon, must be dreadful being in limbo like that.
I'm pleased I checked for updates to the thread before posting as I saw Nemo had provided useful background information for each of us rather than a list. I was going to add myself and E being 3.2 years going on 13 but you've heard all about that grin
Must go, "One Day" is calling, want to find out how it all ends!

BuddhaBelly Mon 30-Jan-12 21:44:28

Nemo sorry I just grin at your incident! shock at your new size I bet dh likes them though wink Enjoy your spa day tomorrow and just think even 5 months pg you'll look slimmer than me in a swimming costume! grin
Marbles I'm going to really really try not to test early so no tempting me smile I don't think we've been lucky enough this time despite preseed x

BuddhaBelly Mon 30-Jan-12 21:45:31

Oh and marbles I really hope your dream comes true smile

BuddhaBelly Mon 30-Jan-12 21:56:33

Impala cross posts we're very busy in here tonight! No plans for my 40th definately don't want a party, it's my dh's 30th so I'd rather mine slipped by unnoticed and hopefully I'll be pg!! Although we're going to the isle of wight the week before which will be lovely smile Where are you hoping to go with dh?

bhudda thankssmile yours toosmile its my 30th this year so im hoping it will be the year of the big birthdays and big bellies for us bothgrin although my belly is sizeable without a baby in thereblush

impala sorry i didn't say anything about the mum situationblush i meant to but as my brain is mush symptom it slipped my mind! my mum is similar although she will have S overnight from time to time. she wont take her out and moans ALOT as if she is being burdened by her granddaughterhmm my dad dotes on S and i think that may be the only reason my mum reluctantly agrees to babysithmm we have a weird relationship and she is VERY skittish and overbearing on S- and therefore very judge-y with me- doesn't agree with alot of my parenting choices (i do naughty step rather than smacking and remove toys/privileges rather than smacking etchmm mum was very slap-happy when i was growing up "didn't do me any harm" apparantly- showed me what not to do i supposehmm) could be worse most definitely but it could also be a hell of a lot better. so not much by way of advice but i suppose i wanted to add to those who feel your pain to one degree or another.


BuddhaBelly Mon 30-Jan-12 22:22:18

Marbles I could have written that exact same post re smacking etc! My mum gave me the same line of "it didn't hurt you" it's the only thing we've fallen out over as I do time out too, my problem is that it doesn't seem to be working hmm which doesn't help my argument with her!!

Nemo thank you very much, that was very thorough smile just what I wanted and I think you're right about the name!! Amazing.

impala thank you for your concern, my little Harry is fit and well and made a full recovery against all the odds! The vets refer to him as 'the miracle' we are very lucky.

I am sorry to hear a few of you ladies have had/are having a tough time but also pleased to hear so much good news, and new babies on the way.

buddha yes, men, I like that! I want to read that stuff from people smile

I, DH and I are doing really well and eagerly awaiting DC2 (I insists it's a girl) I shall attempt to keep up and visit more often, feels good to hear from you all again! Night ladies

CaptainNemo Mon 30-Jan-12 23:28:49

Busiest night in here since sometime in 2008 I reckon gringrin love it!!

Impala One Day was our book club book in September. Top tip: don't finish it!! Anyone else read it?

Anyone around? I'm fixing my laptop so sat here boredgrin

BuddhaBelly Tue 31-Jan-12 07:12:01

Is thrush an early sign?? hmm

Impala Tue 31-Jan-12 08:26:17

Budddha Don't know about thrush, possibly? Try google perhaps?
Nemo Wish I'd seen your post before rushing off back to "One Day", too late now! Really didn't expect that twist sad E woke up at 11pm so still haven't finished it! Tonight I hope. Has anyone else read it? Really recommend it.
Marbles Thanks for your comments re mums, sorry yours isn't quite as supportive as you would like. I catch myself wondering what my dad would have been like with E and whether my parents would have been more hands on. But what ifs are futile really sad Hope your laptop is fixed!
Kat So pleased Harry made a full recovery bless him smile
Buddha It must be so hard if your mum disagrees with something you're doing with E. That is one advantage with my mum, she doesn't try to impose her views at all and just lets me get on with it with E. She has also been a good sounding board at times (especially with the sleep issues). Time out doesn't really work with E either - we call it going to the corner and she just thinks it's funny and refuses to stay, you have to physically restrain her. We have success with counting to 3 when we want her to do something, i.e. "come and brush your teeth otherwise there will be no stories before bed, 1,2,3." On very rare occasions I have put her in her room if she's being a real nightmare but I try to avoid that. Distraction and incentives/reward charts seem to work better for her.
Have a good day all - weather is awful here today so off to an indoor play area this morning and E has a trampolining class this pm, nothing like introducing her to the sport early when she has a coach as a mum grin

It's gone crazy here. So lovely to be back.

About to collect my class but wanted to send huge support to Murray today. We're all there holding your hand xxx

Supergiggle Tue 31-Jan-12 11:31:22

Turk here, new name smile

On phone and not really sure what I am doing here, lovely to see so much activity on the thread!
Gomurray - thinking of you today xxx
Marbles Hope all is ok with you and you are resting up
Impala Have no real advice to offer re mam troubles. My MIL tends to be very hands off when it comes to the twins (well at least when we lived in the same country! she has a good excuse now) But can remember how horrible it was having to practically make appointments for twins to see their granny sad
Nemo So glad scan went well for you smile
Kat Great to see you smile Congrats on the bump grin
Bhudda How is the 2ww coming along? Symptoms !?! smile
Moomin Very envy of your weekend away
Frazzle How are you doing all this running! Seriously need some tips here haha

Am sure have forgotten half of the things I wanted to post as can't scroll back to see previous messages, was one of those days with the twins today, they were a right handful, fighting all day! Got Implant out today, arm is sore so am heading to bed with a good book - and will definitely catch up properly tomorrow

like the new name superGgrin it suits youwink

good luck today murray <holds hand>

hope everyone else is oksmile

BuddhaBelly Tue 31-Jan-12 12:10:07

An extra hand to hold and a hair stroke for gomurray thinking of you

gomurray Tue 31-Jan-12 13:12:59

Wow ladies - what a lot of chat !

Congrats on being PG Kat grin feel free to share your journey to 22 weeks - unless you'd rather nto for any reason of course.

Buddha exciiiintg ! Love a good 2ww symptom spot !!

Nemo I have One Day on my kndle for my next read - should I bother.. crappy ending ?

Marbles got laptop fixed ?

Turk !! What are you doing ?!! New names are just going to confuse me even more !!! Like it though wink

Thank you all so much for your good wishes - my mobile has been going mad with people wishing me luck all morning, am so lucky that so many people care so much. I will be holding your virtual hands in there... am quite nervous now. All I am hoping is that the result is not something that is likely to repeat so that we can proceed with TTC (once my stupid body decides to start working again). Off to collect E from nursery soon - will report back as soon as I can.

frazzlerock Tue 31-Jan-12 13:57:17

Wow! Where the blazes do I start?

Buddha and Marbles Preg dreams from both of you....(!!)

Nemo I hope your spa day is going amazingly! Let us know what treatments you've had. Not jealous.

Murray Thinking of you.... I hope it goes as well as can be expected. xx

Impala One Day is a really nice read isn't it? In fact, I even enjoyed the film, even though I'd read the book first. I still jumped at the "twist" mind!
I've just bought Pigeon English although struggling to read anything at the moment with my mushed up mind... hmm. I'm hoping to get back to normal again soon as I really want to read it! The weather's bad here too, it snowed when we left playgroup... And no, Jack isn't at pre school or anything. Wish I could afford to send him! He turns three in March so hoping to take advantage of the 15 hours a week (or whatever it is) and put him in a nursery. He doesn't start school until September! He's just so ready to go. I struggle to tear him away when I drop Charlie off sad
Actually, maybe I should get Jack into trampolining! That'd burn off some energy grin

Supergiggle Cute name!

Kat Gimme a ping if you fancy Collywobbles on Fri. I can't bare it when there's no one to talk to at that one. Well, there's usually one or two but those 'one or two' bore me senseless (Mean, but oh so true). If you don't go I might head over to see my friend and her little baby twinnies. Saw them today and gave one his feed. They're just so scrummy!

So, I'm going to be chatting to the "other woman" on the phone tonight! <nervous> Decided we need a good Spam bashing session... I'm quite tempted to discuss a bit of revenge.... Any ideas? I'd still love love love to destroy his vinyl collection. It's all in storage until he buys a house though.
Hmmm... Plotting is making me feel much better grin I'm not normally a revenge type of person, I just don't think he should keep getting away with it. It's for the greater good!

frazzle we'll come on fri morning hon, I want to hear about you revenge plan!!!? What's that all about?

Murray I hope you get the answers you need and you can get back on track I was so sorry to hear about your ordeal I can't imagine the pain sad

Buddha I think yes to the thrush

marbles hope you're well?

giggle keep those photos coming on fb I love seeing how you're getting on smile

moomin sorry to hear you've had a tough time, I really hope things start to look up soon

impala my mil is fantastic with I although a bit too needy if a week goes by without seeing her we get 'drop by' visits where she'd call the house from outside to check were in then invite herself in! Was a massive issue for us when we were TTC! My mum on the other hand has her favourite grandchild and as I is a bit 'lively' she watches her from a far hmm

I'll briefly fill in my last year; started TTC in early May then in the 25th was rushed to hospital and in to surgery with suspected ruptured appendix which turned out to be PID. My entire left tube and ovary were seeing puss and had to be cleaned out, I was told that I was most likely only working on one side from then on, but we kept trying, manic charting and obsessing and by an absolute miracle in Sept I got a BFP, more amazingly I was informed the egg had traveled from my damaged side as well! I don't know or care how it happened but we are eternally grateful to whatever force made our dream come true and I cherish every day I wake up pg smile I know how lucky I am and will not be tempting ectopic etc again by trying for a DC3 I'm more than happy witty my Lott.

gomurray Tue 31-Jan-12 17:47:16

Wowee Kat what a traumatic start but so pleased for you that it all worked out and you are happily getting nice and fat (in the best possible way of course !)

frazzle you make me laugh with your crazy chat wink, love that you are taking comfort from plotting revenge !

Well back from appointment and the reason for death was the cord got in a tangle. We were told after delivery that cord had been wrapped around baby but unlikely to be reason for death, but post-mortem has proved otherwise. I have no idea whether cord was wrapped round baby or just tangled round itself and cut off blood supply but to be honest it doesn't make any difference. Net result is that all was ok with baby (which makes it extra sad in a way as I guess if I thought that baby was poorly I could rationalise that it was for the best iykwim). However, on the flip side it means that there is no reason why any future PG should not be absolutely fine smile. Consultant will do my 20 wk scan next time (and I'm sure there will be a next time - positive thinking !) as well as additional scans at 24, 28 and 32 weeks. He said there is no reason to believe it should happen again but I am slightly more at risk that it could (1% chance). Given that my EMCS was due to E having cord wrapped around his neck he said they'd keep a close eye on me but TBH there was nothing they could have done at such an early stage anyway. If it looks like happening again in future they would consider early delivery after 26 weeks. He said the cord was significantly longer than average. He also said that if AF doesn't appear within 8 weeks to go to GP and they'd run tests - he reckons cycle will return in its own good time but am happy that he didn't just tell me to come back in 6 months (given my inability to be patient !) Also found out that baby was a boy which was a huge relief. I had always thought boy until he died and I then thought girl - crazy mind told me maybe my body couldn't carry a girl. I had already started to worry that if this baby had been a girl and then I went on to have a boy in future I'd always look at girls and wonder what mine would be like... doea that make sense ?... The fact that it was a boy is a relief as I have one already and although it made me sad to think that E would have LOVED a little brother it came as a huge relief to me to know that I won't need to torture myself about the girl I'd missed out on. Don't get me wrong, I'll always be sad about the wee boy I never got to know but somehow it is less painful. No idea if that makes sense !!! Ultimately the whole outcome has been the best possible outcome, although sad too. Thank you all so much for your support, it has meant a lot to me. Now onwards and upwards - Marbles if you could have a wee 'ovulation dream' for me and we can get my cycles back on track and start some serious TTC wink.

murray oh sad for your boy (DS2) sad I am glad you have been given a "good" version of the expected news but sad all the same. I'm glad it won't affect future chances and il see what I can do about Ov dreamswink

Impala Tue 31-Jan-12 21:23:48

Gomurray so sad about what happened to your DS2 sad Until Nemo's list yesterday I had no idea it had happened so late sad It's good that you're viewing it as "one of those things", even though that doesn't really make it easier. And at least you'll be closely monitored during your next pregnancy and under consultant care. It sounds as though today was the best possible outcome under the circumstances even though very very sad Here's hoping your cycles return to normal asap and you can start TTC in earnest smile And on a totally different subject, I'd definitely recommend reading "One Day" - not a crappy ending at all (althought I still have a few pages still to read so I may be wrong!) there's just a completely unexpected twist towards the end.
Frazzle Is it worth seeing the film then? If you can't concentrate on anything too weighty at the moment I'd recommend "The pile of stuff at the bottom of the stairs" if you haven't already read it. Hilarious! Hope the conversation with the "other woman" went OK tonight, look forward to hearing all about the revenge plans grin Would definitely recommend getting Jack into trampolining if possible, or gymnastics. We have a great gym club near us which runs toddler gym classes every day, perfect for burning off energy smile
Kat Sorry to hear about the trauma before your pregnancy, really pleased everything has worked out for you smile shock at your mum making it obvious she has a favourite grand-child and not really being involved with I, what is it with mothers??
Supergiggle Love the new name smile
Hope everyone else is OK and that Nemo in particular enjoyed her spa day smile

BuddhaBelly Tue 31-Jan-12 21:32:55

GoMurray I totally get why it was easier to hear that your little one was another boy, it must have been so hard to listen to them telling you what actually happened but I hope it gives you some closure. Good news on the ttc front and very proactive of consultant with the advice about af/ov smile let's just hope you won't need it and your cycles can get themselves sorted very quickly as we know you have no patience wink
Kat sorry to hear of the troubles you had last year thank goodness it has a happy ending smile

Murray glad you are feeling positive about the future but so sad too for your loss sad I hope you have found some form of closure from knowing more. And fingers crossed for ov soon.

BuddhaBelly Wed 01-Feb-12 07:46:22

Do you know what this symptom spotting is really quite useless smile every symptom I have I could have on any day of my cycle! For example yesterday I had a headache, starving hungry and tired all three are early pg symptoms but also can be because I'm stressed at work hungry and tired!! grin
Oh and if you think I'm becoming obsessed with mn your right its because if I keep posting I can keep up with the thread on my app smile

BuddhaBelly Wed 01-Feb-12 07:47:47

Now moomin will tell me off for the wrong your you're blush

Come on mummyltd stop tweeting and visit the zoo!!

CaptainNemo Wed 01-Feb-12 09:28:33

Yes, where is that naughty mummyltd? She's in for a shock when she sees how many posts there are here for her to catch up on!

Murray I'm so glad the appointment went as well as it could and that you'll be given extra appointments next time round. Still so sad but you'll never forget DS2, he'll always be a part of your lives. Have you made any decisions about naming him? Did you have any sort of funeral in the end or did the hospital take care of things for you? I've been thinking about how long it took for my cycle to come back after we lost DS1 and for some reason I have the figure 45 days (cycle length) in mind. Where does that leave you if yours is similar? I also remember that the first AF was not very pleasant. I found it quite uncomfortable and the cramping brought back v unwelcome memories. Hopefully yours will be fine, but just so you're prepared. Think I took some co-codamol which knocked it on the head. We were on a day trip in the mountains of turkey at the time, had just stopped off to sample some local speciality goat stew (you should have seen DH's face grin) so as you can probably imagine, the toilet facilities were not quite all one would have hoped for... confused could have been a lot worse though.

impala yesterday was fantastic, thanks for asking! Now if I could just do that say once a week month I'm sure I'd be a better person! grin Full membership is £75 a month, so if any of you have a spare £75 you've been wondering what to do with, just lob it my way and I'll see it's put to good use! wink Back to reality today with a bump. I have loads of paperwork I can't be arsed need to catch up with and I've been very VERY slack the past few months weeks do really need to get my act together. Not looking too good so far mind, the only thing I've achieved so far today is breakfast and mn! Next stop shower and dog walk, then the sky's the limit!! wink wish me luck... xx

CaptainNemo Wed 01-Feb-12 09:29:39

Ooh fat bird asos order just arrived, yippee for another distraction! grin

Mummylimited Wed 01-Feb-12 12:11:23

Oh my, I can't possibly catch up with all these posts, so I shall just jump in with what I have managed to scan and hope that I don't put my foot in it and get something horribly wrong blush

frazzle it is so good to see you back and sorry that you are having a rubbish time of it. The running will help loads - all those endorphins whizzing around.

kat Congratulations what fab news and Nemo A boy! how lovely and even more lovely to hear that all is well, as I popped on just before you had it and saw that you were understandably worried xx

Right, what else do I need to know, someone catch me up QUICK!

I'm fine, very busy. N really keeps me on my toes and E is now shuffling around too, although he really is the easiest baby you could wish for. He is 8mo today, in fact. It's gone so quick.

Just gearing up to get N at a pre-school, starting after Easter, he's going to try the one that is attached to OH's school. It will be 2 mornings a week to begin with, but should give a bit more, much needed time.

I am busy with the blog, trying to build it up a bit and get some paid work from it, no rush but just need to put the work in now. Increasing readers and comments takes a bit of work.

So lovely to have everyone back. I will be back VERY soon

BuddhaBelly Thu 02-Feb-12 07:15:17

I caved sad did test this morning wasn't FMU as I was up at 3.30am with E but it was -ve sad Preseed let me down!!!

CaptainNemo Thu 02-Feb-12 13:00:19

Buddha sad Could it just have been too soon to test? [clutching-at-straws] What month is this? Was there anything special/different about the month E was conceived you could do/not do again? Though I suspect that's a stupid question and something you've already thought about... sad But you've done it once, you can do it again, you'll be throwing up before you know it, I have every faith xxx

Buddha it took me a while to get a proper + is it too early?

frazzlerock Thu 02-Feb-12 14:42:15

Hey hey.

I'm so cold I can barely type! I'm a bit annoyed actually as I've put about half a stone on recently and it's doing sod all to insulate me. I was embracing it for this very reason but now I'm going to have to give up the chocolate, seeing as it doesn't work sad Plus I can't justify buying a whole new wardrobe in the next size up...

Murray It sounds like you got the best outcome. I can't ever put myself in your shoes so I've no idea how I'd cope but you are doing amazingly. It certainly puts things into perspective for me and I really admire your strength xx

Nemo Glad your spa day went well! What did you buy from ASOS? I've never bought anything from there. In fact anything I buy off the internet I end up sending back!

Mummy Yay, yer back! I'm also hoping to get Jack into a day nursery from March/April time. Need to take full advantage of the free 15 hours a week. He's been ready to start nursery for about a year and he doesn't start at Charlie's school nursery until Sept hmm. Seems ages away, or it did do a year ago!
I'm going to see a nursery on Monday.
I'm half tempted to write a blog, a few friends have suggested it. Might save me from updating FB every five minutes! I'm not sure what I'd write about though hmm

Buddha oh booooo! That's not good news sad The thought of having to go through all the disappointment again puts me off ever having anymore children (not to mention my schizophrenic DS2...) I do hope it happens really soon for you!

So I had the most amazing conversation with the "other woman"... We were gassing away for about an hour!
She made me laugh with her revenge plan, sending him a professional looking box of "arty design stuff" to his work but when he opened it, it'd be a box full of poo grin Cos that'd be quite embarrassing wouldn't it, especially as he's just started with BBC magazines as Art Director <snort>
She's absolutely lovely and totally gets how I'm feeling. In fact, the morning after I felt like a different woman. I didn't get that awful dread feeling I always get. I actually smiled when my alarm went off! Result!

Right, better go, I need a wee and must wake up the kids so we can go and pick up my Jedi knight from school.

Cheerio for now!

BuddhaBelly Fri 03-Feb-12 08:07:03

Af arrived yesterday sad angry smile and yes I feel all those emotions!!

frazzlerock Fri 03-Feb-12 08:19:40

I'm glad to see a smile in there Buddha. We appear to be in sync at the moment....

Mummylimited Fri 03-Feb-12 15:59:13

Aaah Buddha sorry to hear that. How long have you been TTC now, I may have missed this?

Frazzle I have thought in the past that you would be good at writing a blog. Just write about what interests you and be yourself is my advice and do only do it if you enjoy it, otherwise it just becomes a hassle

We are having a lazy afternoon with Toy Story 2 - I haven't heard a peep out of N since it started. E is sleeping (as usual) wink

BuddhaBelly Sat 04-Feb-12 11:49:27

Frazzle sounds as if you've met a kindred spirit in the other woman! Love the revenge plan she had wink but the best bit is that just talking about has cleared your mind a little and made you feel better about life smile
mummyltd Been ttc about 4/5 months so not long in the big scheme of things it's just in my head if I don't have a baby this year I'll be too old! Times a ticking wink

Have you all got snow? We had a little which stuck and now it's stopped falling so I'm sure it'll just be slush soon sad

evening ladiesgrin

i have had the whole night free of DH and DDgrin snuggling on the couch with a DVD and dominos pizza (and the doggrin) its been blissfulsmile DH is back home now from the pub so my peace has gone away haha

i tested and got BFN albeit not FMU but it would be a BFP by now either way...i have a GP appointment on thursday to discuss things and thats lucky as i seem to have hurt my shoulder and cant lift my arm properly confused i suspect its lupus related but my mum said it sounds similar to something my dad had at around my age. He had a calcified shoulder and had to have it surgically released!! im hoping its not that but hey ho...given my health luck its gonna be more than nothinghmm

buddha sorry AF came to callangry my next AF should be due around the 14th ish and i feel like, if only just to draw a line under this whole thing, i would be ok with that. i really hope this is your last month TTC and you get your BFP smile il be here to hold your hand and also if you want to talk about it you have my numberwink

hope everyone is enjoying the weekend (and the snow for those who have it-we dontsad) smile

BuddhaBelly Sun 05-Feb-12 12:57:37

marbles that sounded like a delicious evening smile good luck for thursday in advance you are so overdue some luck my lovely seems to be one thing after another sad you really need some conclusive answers so you know exactly where you stand as you can't keep on like this it will drive you crazyconfusedgrin
If its any consolation our snow is melting now. I know what would cheer us up what about bringing one of your scrummy cakes I see on fb in for us all to eat. Virtual calories are good for us grinwink

gomurray Sun 05-Feb-12 19:46:44

Evening ladies,

Buddha so sorry to hear BFN sad. Hope you are coming to the end of AF and looking forward to the fun bit soon wink.

frazzle thank you so much for your kind words - much appreciated.

MummyLtd we love Toy Story in this house too

Sorry laptop keyboard has started playing up mid post apologies for lack of punctuation for rest of post

marbles i second that you are way overdue some good luck mi dear really hope dr can help with shoulder as well as ttc issues

no news from me still no sign of flipping ov arrghhhh ! body still trying but failing it is doing my head in almost as much as this keyboard

will call back when i have a better machine at my disposal at work xx

hi ladiessmile

i just thought i would ask if anyone has any insight into WTF is going on inside my body? no? me neither!confused i ask because i went the loo before and i am spotting again!! light pinky peachy colour...heavy enough to need a padconfused i am around CD22 since the CP and i NEVER have mid cycle spotting even with the other MCs its always been finish bleeding and move onto next quite con fused by it all and i called the GP who is going to call me back for some advice...any other suggestions? shall i just give up trying to guess its next move(my uterus)? im getting utterly utterly peed off with it all nowhmm

gomurray Mon 06-Feb-12 12:27:46

marbles oh you poor love sad, you are having such a rubbish time of it. Has GP called you back yet ? There is little point trying to guess what is going on as guessing is all that it would be. I reckon that with all of these strange goings-on you are surely going to get fully investigated - scans, bloods etc... to find out what is happening and put your mind at rest while helping to sort out whatever the issue is. Feel free to offload any time mrs, you know we are here to listen, even when we have little concrete advice to offer. My heart goes out to you xx

nemo I forgot to thank you for your words of wisdon on 1st post-MC AF. Am dreading it but also willing it to happen. Had a bit of a meltdown this morning. I had convinced myself that temp was going to rise this morning so was absolutely gutted when it remained low - poor DP was woken by me in floods of tears. Such a shitty start to the week, esp when I have to come to work and see everyone else's massive bumps which just remind me of what I have lost and my stupid body won't even give me a chance of growing a new bump sad angry sad

thanks murray smile

the GP called back and wants me to go in and see him at 3:50 as he thinks it may be a threatened ectopic and seemed quite concerned about it all...i thought he was going to ask me to wait until the next time AF turns up/doesnt arrive and go in a bit worried nowconfused bloody norah!

BuddhaBelly Mon 06-Feb-12 14:40:11

Right firstly big hugs to marbles and murray
marbles Good to know that gp is taking this seriously, goodness what a pickle your body seems to be in lately confused I really hope that you get a referral out of this if nothing else. Let us know how you get I and good luck x
murray It must be so hard seeing those bumps day in day out sad do you think you are putting the pressure on yourself to be pg before due date too? Your hormones are probably still confused, didn't your gp/consultant say they'd do something if af/ov didn't happen soon? Can't go back and check your post on this ap angry

buddha I'm surprised actually as the same GP has been very poo in the past! I'm sat in the waiting room now and it turns out my appt is at 4:10 so I'm a bit early...blush

BuddhaBelly Mon 06-Feb-12 18:48:14

Marbles How did you get on?

evening ladiessmile
i went to the GP and it looks like i am either still MC retained products etc or MC again(not likely as you have to have sex to get preg last time i checkedhmm) the Dr examined me and my cervix is open suggesting a continued MCsad i suspect that the spotting was the 'baby' part and this is everything else maybe? either way my 'cycle' has been the epitome of a WTF cycle in every way and starting from today and i have told my womb that this doesnt happen again and i am going to start some vitamins tomorrow called B100 that have been recommended by other MNers as helpful for recurrent MC. any other suggestions would be welcommed with open arms as i appear to be totally inept at avoiding Mcsad

BuddhaBelly Mon 06-Feb-12 21:33:47

Oh Marbles that's completely shit for you sad is there nothing they can do medically? Have you ever tried acupuncture? Some MNers say that's good? Do you do baby aspirin too? I'm a bit stuck for advice otherwise but I can hold hands and give really good hair strokes too smile

CaptainNemo Mon 06-Feb-12 22:11:30

Oh Marbles and Murray sad I'm so sorry things are so crap for you both...

Marbles did the gp suggest actually DOING anything or are they just saying its down to the lupus and nothing they can do? Friends of ours got an nhs referral to Lesley Regan at St Mary's in Paddington, I know it's a LONG way from you though... The other place I've heard talked about a lot is the Liverpool Women's Hospital, or is that where you go already? Have you read Lesley Regan's book on mc btw? I found it v helpful. Actually might not be a bad idea for you too Murray, I bought a used one on amazon, think it was only a couple of pence plus p&p....

Murray I've already said I don't know how you're managing with the bumps at work, I really did not cope with pregnant women AT ALL after we lost T. It's funny what other people can go through without you knowing though. When I was pregnant with DD we went to see a solicitor DH knows, to do our wills. I had no idea at the time, but turns out she and her husband were going through ivf at the time. No way would you have realised there was any issue during the appt, she seemed fine, professional, chatty etc, but DH had lunch with her a week or so ago and she told him she was so upset at seeing me pregnant that she had to take the rest of the day off sad She now has a baby, just back from mat leave smile (Though she nearly died during labour so can't have any more sad)
Am rambling now, sorry...
How long is your cycle normally? I'd say wait til you've effectively missed 2 periods then get in touch with your consultant and ask for a scan so they can have a look what's going on... Can you bear to wait that long? How many days is it since the mc now?

I second Buddha's comments about acupuncture. Think it could really help both of you, both emotionally and physically. And Murray it can def be good at luck starting things when you're waiting for af... Just a thought...

Lots of love to you both xxxx

gomurray Mon 06-Feb-12 22:34:29

Bloody iPhone, just lost big post for marbles. Basically B100 is a good idea as is baby aspirin. Also D3 is something that women with history of MC often lack , you can buy it from health food shops (better than simple vit D). I have a link to a great website, will pass it on tmrw when on laptop. Big hugs and well done you for taking positive action xx

Nemo, thanks mrs. I have Lesley's book on pg, may see if can get it on amazon/eBay. Did you mean that acupuncture can help restore cycles ? May try that next. It has now been 8 long weeks and no sign of a thermal shift. Consultant said wait another 8 weeks. Am just pissed off waiting. Have had such a low day, hopefully back a bit chirpier tmrw xx

Impala Tue 07-Feb-12 09:00:29

Big hugs to Marbles and Murray, what a horrible day for you both yesterday sad Glad the GP took you seriously Marbles but sad that nothing concrete is happening, so frustrating. Can't offer much advice but I would also recommend acupuncture, I had it after my mc and if nothing else it felt as though I was actively doing something to help my body get and then stay pg. I had it throughout my pg with E and it really helped. Murray sad at all the bumps around you. That must be so hard. After my mc I just couldn't bear to be around pg women either (and my best friend was pg at the time, due just two months before I would have been sad). I have a copy of Lesley Regan's book which I no longer need, if you email me your address via FB I can post it to you. Acupuncture helps to balance everything so it should help to restore your cycles. Try to find someone who has experience of dealing with pg issues if possible.
Hope everyone else is OK apart from being a bit bleary-eyed (seen the posts on FB!) we've been having great fun in the snow over the past couple of days. Shame it's melting now sad
Have a good day all x

gomurray Tue 07-Feb-12 22:35:02

Impala thank you so much for the offer of the book, I will pass you adress via FB smile

Buddha you were right that I am def putting pressure on myself to be PG by EDD - I just don't know how I will cope with April if not PG or at least in with a chance. I know deep down that it would be better to relax and just let nature take its course and what will be will be etc... sadly being chilled and patient is not in my repertoire !

Am way happier than yesterday although started the day quite tearful - things have improved as v busy at work so kept my mind off lack of ov.

Marbles how are you my dear ? If I were you I'd definitely have a good read of the link below and gen up on the best foods to eat/avoid to help prevent MC. At least this way you know that you are doing everything in your power to prevent MC. There are also snippets of research related to TTC and I also recall reference to lupus - so def worth a look. Taking positive action will definitely make you feel better as at least you can feel a tiny bit in control xx

How are you other lovely ladies ?

hi ladiessmile

thanks so much for the well wishes and supportsmile you lot are wonderful <sob>
very heavy bleeding today so hopefully things will clear out quite quickly and DH and i can get down to business very soonsmile i have started the B100 complex today and i am going to have a look at the link you have posted murray (thankyou for posting the link esp as you are having a much harder time of it than me {{{hugs}}})

how is everyone else?

Impala Wed 08-Feb-12 21:23:06

Marbles and Murray forgot to mention yesterday that I also found Maggie Howells's Natal Hypnotherapy CDs very useful after my mc. In particular the one entitled Preparing to Conceive. Don't know if you're into relaxation/visualisation techniques but here is the link:
Hope everyone is OK, it's very quiet in here tonight! I know Frazzle is out sampling cocktails judging from the photos on FB but where is everyone else??


anyone about? im stuck in work and want to go homesad

its the EDD for the MC i had in july2010 todaysad feeling a bit sad that i would have had an almost 1 year old now if all had panned outsad

ahh well such is life...

gomurray Sat 11-Feb-12 10:00:41

marbles how are you today ? I can only imagine how sad it must be to have another EDD pass with no baby
Did you have a chance to read this link I posted ? what action are you planning to take ? onwards and upwards mrs xx

impala thank you so so much for the book which arrived yesterday and the lovely note
I only got it late last night as spent the entire day at Scotlands top spa (with thermal outdoor pool !) It was such a fab day just what I needed to chill me out Afterwards my friend and I indulged in a few cocktails and vino so it was a late night

apologies for zero punctuation again new laptop on its way thank goodness !

where is everybody ?

I am looking forward to getting stuck into the MC book impala thanks again I am so impressed at the speedy delivery I would have taken days if not weeks to get round to sending it ! It truly is much appreciated xx

nemo how is your blue bump coming along ?


murray I read the link and reported it on the mosh pit thread too as it was rather interesting! I have bought D3 and started it last night and I have been taking B100 for a few days smile thank you so much for the link. I really appreciate itsmile how have you been getting on? I feel like I have been wallowing in mememe land and have totally neglected everyone elsesad I'm in PMA land now so I will be a better zoo pal I promiseblush

CaptainNemo Sat 11-Feb-12 20:58:36

Hello animals smile Not much to report but thought I'd touch base.

Marbles sad for EDD. I've not been through it nearly as many times as you but I'm incredibly squeamish about working out EDD for that exact reason. Didn't find out what it was this time til 12 week scan, and only cos they put it on my notes, would rather not have known even then... Not that that will be much comfort to you now sad Hope the bleeding is easing off now? xx

Murray envy at spa! Honestly believe days like that are good for the soul wink so am glad you enjoyed it. You certainly deserved it after everything you've been through. Have you thought any more about acupuncture? Really think it could help, not only with emotional support but with getting your cycle back on track. Second Impala's comments about finding someone with experience treating pg/mc.
So nice of you to ask about bump, am sure it's the last thing you want to hear about really. Suffice it to say, am getting FAT (cake not bump) and think an finally feeling movement, though not loads. Saw MW on thurs, all seemed fine.

Impala have you still got snow? We've had none here! It got pretty close to us, I was in Winchester this morning (for an acupuncture appt funnily enough - which has totally wiped me out, but in a good way, am sooo sleepy) and there was still snow on the ground there. Bet DD loved it!

Can I get your opinions on something please ladies? Can't remember if I've mentioned it already but am quite anxious about how big this baby will be... DD was 8lb 9oz, boys are generally bigger than girls and 2nd babies are generally bigger than first... so I'm thinking about 1.5 stone?!? I had a 3rd degree tear with DD, so gawd knows what state I'd be in after a 10lb baby. Am also quite worried about the shoulder thingie that the baby on OBEM had this week, basically the head gets out but the shoulders get stuck. Can be VERY bad news. It wasn't OBEM that made me worry about it, I was worried already! I mentioned to my doula that I was concerned about the size of the baby and her main suggestion was to cut right down on carbs (prob my main food group atm) and eat more fat and protein. I wanted to know what you thought about that? I think I'm basically not going to do it... It would be completely foreign to the way I eat, I'd find it easier to go veggie than eat loads of fat and protein. I mentioned it to the lady I see for acupuncture and she asked about my blood group. I'm an A, which she said could be why I struggle with too much protein/fat. I ordered the blood group diet book on amazon (for 1p plus p&p!) which is pretty interesting and basically says the same thing. But after all that I'm still worried about having a 10lb baby who gets stuck and/or rips me to shreds.... I hope you don't mind me posting about this on here, given what everyone else is going through blush I'm not on any other threads atm, gave up on the June thread as it's SO enormous. Anyways, any advice/words of wisdom would be much appreciated, even if it's just to tell me to shut up and stop worrying about things I can do nothing about!


gomurray Mon 13-Feb-12 14:06:08

Hi Nemo lovely to see you back. OMG you poor thing worrying about the birth after you had a 3rd degree tear last time - eeek !
I saw OBEM and had my heart in my mouth - it was dreadful - especially the expressions on one of MW's face ! It was so obvious she thought the baby had no chance shock. Anyway, having watched that I fully understand why you are so concerned about similar happening - I assume the arm getting stuck is more common in larger babies ?
As for the diet thing, could you cut down on carbs and introduce some extra non-meat protein into your diet ? I don't know much about it but surely worth a try to avoid huge baby. Is there a case for CS, or would you rather avoid that ? I really don't know what else to suggest - hugs xx
oh and yes am off to investigate acupuncture - thanks xx

CaptainNemo Wed 15-Feb-12 10:26:56

<Wails> Where IS everyone?!?!??!?!?!

Wanted to come on and moan about my bloody awful valentines day hmmangry. Am sure my next husband will be less of a tosser better at it..... hmm

Hope everyone is ok xx

BuddhaBelly Wed 15-Feb-12 15:08:15

Sorry for being AWOL E has been poorly and I've been poorly since Friday went to gp Monday she said virus but ended up in hospital at 2am unable to breathe due to pain in side. After lots of tests X-rays etc decided its a nasty chest infection, had anti sickness drugs, saline as dehydrated (throwing up non stop for 3 days) and anti-b's by drip was able to come home this morning sad feeling a bit sorry for myself so come on Nemo tell me about your not so "d" h make me smile

BuddhaBelly Wed 15-Feb-12 15:59:28

Marbles how are you doing my lovely? Sorry about your edd anniversary sad especially as you've just had another mc sad it brings it all home.
murray how's the obsessive regular temping going? Any ov signs yet? I'm gutted as ov due anytime so will miss out this month sad I'm impatient too!
nemo I'm not surprised you are worrying about birth after "that" plus size of baby shock have you made a decision about food/diet yet?

Hope everyone else is ok? smile

gomurray Wed 15-Feb-12 20:34:07

hurray some activity again thought i had killed the thread !

nemo come on spill about valentines day and cheers us up _ we do not do valentines so no disappointment here _ as i always say it is like valentines day every day in my house _ AS IF !

Buddha poor you being so poorly _ is there no way you are up to a BD ? i feel your pain missing the egg boooo

no ov here ten flipping weeks grrrr I have emailed an enquiry about acupuncture so hopefully that will help when i get started _ please tell me it does not hurt _ so far everyone i have mentioned it to is quite surprised as i HATE needles ! is it a bad move ? i figured it surely doesnt hurt if people fall asleep during the treatment ! Have been getting loads of mild crampy feelings and plenty of we for daaaays but still temp stays low booooo Am so fed up with my body tricking me now that i no longer get my hopes up every morning which is good as the disappointment was getting me down

hopefully have new laptop and puncutation soon xx

hello to the absent ladies _ where are you ????

gomurray Wed 15-Feb-12 20:34:57

we is EWCM stupid keyboard wont allow me to delete now !

blardy norah buddhashock how awful!! glad they have let you home now and you are on the mend <<<<hugs>>>>

nemo i would maybe ask for growth scans etc on the basis of the 3d tear. its pretty much the only thing i worry about re:birthing in the future as i had a 2d tear and DD was 8lb 12oz. apparantly rubbing baby oil/bio oil/vaseline on the scar tissue/pereneum can help avoid a tear during crowning so maybe get going with that (or ask DH to do it in punishment for the Vday disaster you hint towink though if hes anything like my DH he would jump at the chanceblush)

murray how are you feeling lovely? did you start temping/TTC? (need to read back in a sec as my brain is seive-like)

where has everyone else disappeared to?smile

DH and i are at it like the proverbial bunny...grin the vitamins seem to be doing the trick as i am on CD10 and have had EWCM already shock so with any luck i may have a more "normal" cycle and we may catch the egg...i am officially back in the TTC saddlesmile

oh there you are murraysmile so AF is still AWOL? your consultant said he would help did he not? i seem to remember frazzle had to take something or other to bring AF on when she was TTC J from the GP(?) i know its not the same situation but maybe it could be the same medication? hope she arrives soon...

Mummylimited Fri 17-Feb-12 07:52:46

Oh boo Murray that sounds so frustrating. I thoroughly recommend the Lelsey Regan book though, really informative and supportive. Made me want to have her as my doctor. I've heard good things about acupuncture too, but it might take some guts on your part in you don't like needles!

go marbles fingers crossed. I admire you getting back on the TTC horse (ahem) time after time. I hope this time is the one for you.

Nemo I have to say I would be sceptical about the food thing, I can' imagine it would make more than maybe a few pounds different and you could have the hassle of changing you diet dramatically for no benefit. If it helps both my boys were exactly the same weight.
TMI time. I did do perineum massage for both my births from about 34 weeks. I didn't have any stitches and when my MW with no2 found this out she asked me if I had done the massage. She really seemed to think that it makes a difference. It's not very pleasant but if it helps it's worth it.

We have had a nice quiet half-term. Off to see the priest about getting E baptised this afternoon. Even though he's really nice I still get nervous - stupid

gomurray Mon 20-Feb-12 13:28:58

Helllooo ladies - where are you all ?...

Marbles how is TTC going this month, are you at the fun part ?

MummyLtd how did appt with priest go ? Do you have a date for baptism ?

frazzle well done on half marathon - am very impressed !

nemo how are you feeling missus ?

Moomin long time not chat - what is the latest with you ?

well... drum roll please....... my temperature rose for 3 consecutive days so I have offically ovulated - whoopppeeeee ! What a relief to finally get back to normal grin. I still plan to go to acupuncture to keep things on track as I believe first few cycles can be a bit hit or miss after MC. So, in a few weeks I'll be joining you ladies on the TTC rollercoaster ! Huurrraaayyyyyyyyy!

hi smile

murray thats fab news about the Ov!! how are you feeling?smile

hi everyone else!

DH and i have been having ALOT of SWI time! in fact i am on CD15 now and i have sexed up DH 8 days out of 10shock we are planning to continue until at least the weekend too so i will be rather in need of a lie in on sundaywink the D3 and b100 seem to be making a difference too as i have had rather more EWCM than usual and also had Ov pains (i think) on saturday! im not temping so SWI is continuing until i am past my latest Ov date (CD22) but if i did Ov sat that would make AF due around CD25 ish...only time will tell!

frazzlerock Tue 21-Feb-12 13:36:18

<quietly knocks>
<sheepishly enters>

Sorry. I've been shit, quite frankly. Been a bit self absorbed lately and properly down in the dumps, although don't really feel justified when there are people with real problems.

Still... I came back!

Marbles Man you've been through the mill with TTC and I'm so sorry you've had to go through so much shit with it all. Lupus? Is this a recent diagnoses? I don't remember you talking about it before? I've no idea what it is <googles>

Murray Huzzah for an egg release! Must be a weight off your shoulders? Acupuncture sounds like a plan. I've never had it but I've always been interested and would definitely do it if I knew it would help.

Nemo Book in for a roof top birth! wink Seriously though, I'm not sure there's owt you can do is there? Some people just have bigguns. You're quite tall aren't you? Is DH tall too? FWIW C was 9lb 12 (12 days late but still...) and J was 8lb 5 (three days early). But then I had sections.... C did get stuck trying to come out ear first!
Don't start cutting things out of your diet. You'll be miserable!

I'm still high from the race on Sunday. It was such an amazing experience. They always are. I got through it in 1hr 48 minutes but my time was re-adjusted as the race was half a mile too long so I actually got through it in 1hr 45 mins! A whole 12 minutes shaven off my PB smile V happy.
Although I did a silly thing and emailed Spam that evening. We are both obsessed about running and always really support eachother on races and training. Not having him around was really hard. I just said I'd been thinking lots and valued our friendship when none of the other shit was going on, that I missed having his support and that he'd have really enjoyed the race. I said it'd be nice if we could do Cardiff and Bristol together seeing as we're both signed up for it. Then saying I hope we can patch things up for friendship's sake.... That was Sunday night and I've not heard back sad
I'm such a loser.

Hope you're all having a good week. I'm trying to distract myself as I've been eating a disgusting amount of chocolate and sweets over the past few weeks. I've spiralled out of control and can't seem to get back to normal again. Just craving utter shit. I'm sure I'm going to give myself Diabetes eating too much sugar (is that possible?)
I've started today cutting down on portion size and avoiding sugar as much as possible. If it wasn't for the junk in between meals I actually eat very healthily but I have too much of it. Always porridge for breaky but I'm not satisfied unless I have a tonne of it! Lunch is half a carton of fresh soup and two slices of rye toast but I'm always on the look out for something else and this goes on all afternoon. I think it's boredom. Must keep busy busy busy!

FRAZZLE!! grin <<gives frazzle a big hugsmile>> nice to see yousmile

FWIW you are NOT a loser!! hes the loser!! extending the hand of friendship was a very decent thing given how he has treated you. He is a moron for not answering you and (you already know this) you are better off without morons in your lifewink my sister and i are coming to london for the weekend in july i think so i may have to make to trip to thw SW area for a coffee (S may be coming as we are going to the harry potter exhibit so we could meet and take C&J? theres AAAAGGGEEEESSSS before then ATM though so we will seesmile

frazzlerock Tue 21-Feb-12 17:15:29

Thanks Marbles <sigh> Still makes me feel like an utter fool for giving a shit.

I'd love love love to see you and S! Just make sure it's not the last weekend in July as we're off to Camp Bestival (that reminds me, must book tix!)

BuddhaBelly Wed 22-Feb-12 12:05:03

Murray Fantastic news that you have finally ov'd and without any help just your clever body wink I think it would be a good idea to still do the accupuncture at least it will ensure everything stays on track and relax you a little smile
Nemo You never came back to fill us in sad
Marbles It's great to have another ttc buddy sounds as if your right on track this month, can you remind me what vitamins you are taking?
Mummyltd How did it go with the scary priest wink
Frazzle Congratulations on your improved PB well done you! Have you heard anything back from spam yet? Your contact was made with the right intentions but I'm sure he doesn't deserve it. It's so hard to forget/ignore them these "men" have a way of weedling into your head and not shifting! Sounds as if chocolate and sugary stuff has been your distraction, all sounds so familiar! Take it easy on yourself you've been through a lot smile

Well I'm finally starting to feel a little more human but absolutely gutted that we missed the egg this month sad Being so poorly has really made me rethink the whole ttc/pg thing as I'm so worried about being sick sick sick again and then not being a very good mum to Ewan sad I know it's only temporarly but having thrown up for 4 days constantly I so don't want to jump into that again. I know someone will say every pg is different but in all 4 pg's that I've had I've been sick as a dog! God that sounds so selfish!

hey buddha<<squashy hug>>smile lovely to see you back xx are you feeling better?

WRT the TTC doubts i have had these wobbles and took some time out from TTC after the MCs each time (except this timewink) i was scared i would be neglecting DDs needs by being so ill etc but the ill you are in preg is different than how ill you would be with an illness IYSWIM so unless hyperemesis and hospitalisation is a possibility i doubt E would feel neglected. it is an entirely personal choice and only you know how you feel about it xx we decided to power on as the urge to procreate is stronger than any fears i have or have had so sadly i will probably be TTC foreversad i hope you are ok and are taking care of yourselfsmile

BuddhaBelly Wed 22-Feb-12 17:36:13

marbles thanks for your words of wisdom I think I've lost my broodiness sad I hope its just temporary but with E being crap with sleep again me being poorly I just feel a bit low. Kick me up the arse and I'm sure I'll be fine smile

frazzlerock Wed 22-Feb-12 21:33:54

It'll be worth the sickness Buddha I'm sure!
I can't imagine having any more. I get broody now and again but J is such hard work. Another one like him would finish me off!

Just back from a run and knackered but craving naughty sweet stuff again. Need to knock it on the head big time.

I had my jabs this morning for my holibobs in April. I was all brave and everything! Now my arms feel like they've been battered. Will this pain ever go away?! Jeeez. Still, it's soooo worth it. 10 whole nights sans enfants. Just me and my mate grin Jealous much?

Impala Thu 23-Feb-12 21:17:12

Hello smile
Sorry, I've been awol too recently, I don't know where the time goes sometimes.
Murray Glad the book arrived safely and hope you're finding it helpful. So pleased things are getting back on track with ov, that is great news smile I would definitely have acupuncture anyway just to help things along and support a new pg. As for the needles, they are nothing like the medical needles used for injections etc. They're so fine you honestly barely feel them going in and once they're in you don't feel them at all.
Frazzle Well done you with your new PB, what a great feeling smile Sorry you've not heard back from Spam, but you did the decent thing in trying to stay friends and if he's not prepared to meet you half-way then you're better off without him in your life, in any guise. It's very hard though, especially when you share a common interest and if you know you might bump into him at races etc. Not jealous at all of your 10 days away sans enfants envy wink
Buddha So sorry you've been so ill, sounds horrendous sad When you feel run-down and exhausted then you're bound to focus on all the negatives of being pg/having a new baby. Lack of sleep is a real killer, I shoud know sad Give it a few days and you'll be feeling more positive. If you really are having a wobble then maybe take some time out from ttc as Marbles suggested and really think about what you want. It's such a personal decision and even once you've made it you'll still have "what if" moments. I know I do about having DC2. I know in my heart of hearts that I don't want another, but I do occasionally think about it and wonder and probably always will.
However, any lingering thoughts of DC2 I might have at times are quickly dismissed since I'm having a bit of a nightmare with E at the moment. I'm finding it bad enough dealing with one, never mind two! We're having strops, full-blown tantrums, defiance, not listening... the list goes on and it's doing my head in! She'll refuse to obey a simple request (such as put her coat on to go out) and then it all goes into meltdown and nothing is then right - she doesn't want to put her coat on but doesn't want to go out without it either. hmm I've tried all the obvious tricks but it's doing my head in, especially by the end of the day. DH and I are pretty relaxed with her and don't have many rules, she's pretty free to do as she pleases, but there are some non-negotiables, such as cleaning teeth or getting ready for bed for example and I'm getting fed up with the battles. It's not just at home either, she's doing it at nursery too. Yesterday she didn't get her morning good behaviour star there as apparently she refused to wash her hands before lunch when asked and ended up throwing herself on the floor screaming. So she didn't get a sticker at the end of the day. Not that she was that bothered! I've started telling her that she has three books before bed and if she acts up during the day they will be taken away. I give her ample warning of this but to no avail. Yesterday she was down to 2 books by bed-time (after the incident at nursery) and today she had none after kicking off at swimming, then in the supermarket and then round at my mum's. She loves her books at bed-time and gets upset if she loses even one book but doesn't seem to make the link between her behaviour and the fact that she's going to lose a book. We do read together during the day btw, it's not as though bed-time is the only time we sit down to read, but it's the only thing that seems to work. Time out doesn't work with her, she refuses to stay in the corner and just laughs. And if, for example, I say "If you don't put your coat on then we're not going out" then she's quite happy to stay at home. And this doesn't work if I actually need to get her out of the house for nursery or something. For really bad behaviour (such as spitting which she's also started doing after picking it up from nursery) she immediately gets sent to her room, but I don't want to use that punishment too often and I also don't want her having negative associations with her room as we have enough trouble with her sleeping as it is! Any suggestions, I'm fed up with this! I know it's probably just a phase but it's wearing me down at the moment and I spend my day just dreading the next battle sad
On a brighter note, I've decided that I want to celebrate my 40th in Paris so DH, DD and I will be heading there at the end of June smile How about you Buddha, any plans for yours? When is it exactly?
Hope everyone else is OK.
PS. Nemo Do fill us in on Valentine's Day, we're desperate to hear all about it!

BuddhaBelly Thu 23-Feb-12 22:21:15

Impala we too are having some downright horrible behaviour along with the spitting too shock <shudder> time out for E doesn't have much effect so we've been putting toys on time out specifically those he's playing with before he has a meltdown and that seems to be working for us. It's horrible when they are having 'episodes' and I hover over him when we go anywhere waiting for something to happen which makes him worse but I can't seem to stop it blush No plans for my 40th we're going away the week before I'm kinda hoping to be pg so I can hide away wink

BuddhaBelly Thu 23-Feb-12 22:22:31

Would a reward chart work for E? I've not done that yet as I feel Ewan's too young but E is that bit older so it may work?

evening ladiessmile

impala lovely to see you m'dearsmile sounds like E is really testing her boundaries with you!! S has phases like this and the thing that has worked up until now is taking away priviledges. For S it is TV, swimming, her favourite doll and her ipod ATM. The things that can be, are put ontop of the tall wardrobe in my bedroom where she cant get them and she goes straight to bed and to sleep, no negotiation. She also has to apologise and mean it (no attitude in the apology) and she has to earn her things back with good girl points (sticker chart to begin with, now its more time she has been "good" IYSWIM)

She has also had the "not wearing a coat" thing, i decided to pick my battles as if she is cold she will learn to wear her coat. I just take a fold away jacket with me when we are out so she wont stay coldsmile It is mainly attitude and getting dressed for school that is our battle now but her HT is having words as i have informed the school of this as she is late a few days a week (a few minutes but still late) They have asked recently why she is late and I told them in front of her! She is 6 now so needs to learn it isnt acceptable.

i hope somewhere in that mammoth ramble i have made some suggestions that may be of some helpsmile
Im spending my 30th in paris with my sister in maysmile you have family in paris do you not? we are going for the sights (and child-free girls breakgrin)

buddha sorry E has been playing up too! kids eh!! sounds like you are doing similar to what we are as we didnt really get very far with naughty step etc either! S just gets up and messes around like its a game or sobs like im murdering herhmm we havent done time out for S for AGES for that reason and i think she getting a bit old for it now too! hope you are feeling better xx

hi to everyone elsesmile

frazzlerock Fri 24-Feb-12 14:25:55

Impala You should meet Jack. You will think E is the perfect angel, trust me. He is Mr Defiance. Everything is "NO!" But said in a really spoilt brat way. He's been like this forever and I can't see him changing.
There's nothing I can say to you except sympathise! Deep breaths, deeeeeeeep breaths......

frazzlerock Fri 24-Feb-12 14:27:50

Oooh Marbles!! A childfree trip to Paris! That is truly awesome and you bloody well deserve it too!

CaptainNemo Mon 27-Feb-12 09:54:05

Hello ladies blush so sorry I've been away for so long. I've been thinking about you lots (and feeling guilty for my absence...) Unfortunately this isn't a proper catch up as I have LOADS of work I need to (and prob won't) do today and I'm still in bed! shock been awake off and on since 4.30 so was really hoping to catch up on some much needed sleep, but apparently not. Sigh. DD was up at 4.30 as we (stupidly) managed to leave the only toy she really cares about (apart from baby) in Kent with the friends we were staying with this weekend.., it's a blanket my sister gave her when she was first born and she needs/wants it for bedtime and naps. Idiot parents. She's been waking early a LOT lately so I've succumbed in desperation and have a kidsleep clock on order from jojo as I had a 15% discount code. Have any of you tried then? It the gro clocks?

I'm sorry for the me me me post, I promise to come back tonight to try to catch up with everyone properly. Have loved hearing everyone's news, even though it's not all positive... But Murray whoop whoop for ov!!

Ps REALLY need some boys name suggestions if you can bear to turn your minds to it... Current front runners are Jude and (hopefully Mummy won't mind) Noah, but not totally sure about either. Have 3 months to go so no rush, but it's praying on my mind - you know his I love to have something to worry about! Oh, and speaking of which, saw consultant last week to check cervix length again, is still ok but had shortened 10mm since last check 4 weeks before so I have to go back in a fortnight.... Am so crap at being pregnant, it's just one thing after another... But please don't think I don't know how lucky we are, am not really moaning (promise) just venting. Right. That's enough about ME. Will be back for a less selfish post later xxxx

frazzlerock Mon 27-Feb-12 15:58:10

Ooh Nemo My fave boys names are:

Jude (fer shizzle)
Samuel (I know, I know... but was top of my boys list waaaaay before I met the spam)
Albert (Albie)

I'll be back with more no doubt!
BTW I hope the clock works... J has rabbits from Jojo which I have lots of spares of!

CaptainNemo Mon 27-Feb-12 21:26:42

Frazzle thanks for the list, I think you and I have quite similar taste! Sorry to hear about the email situation, fwiw it sounds like EXACTLY the sort of thing I would have done (and probably regretted...) but it's so hard once they're in your head, and it must have been especially tough when it related to something you used to do together.... But, on a more positive note, bloomin well done on your new pb!! That's FANTASTIC! You should be very proud of yourself madam. And re an earlier post, I think you'd make a fab blogger too smile How are your arms now?

Impala sorry to hear you're having such a tough time with E. I think the only piece of advice I can give is "this too shall pass". T hasn't ever really got on well with the naughty step/corner either, we used it for a bit but pretty quickly she'd run over to it by herself, laughing, when she'd done something naughty. Little cow. Good luck, I hope it's not too stressful....

Marbles glad to hear about all the SWI, and the trip to Paris, that sounds AMAZING!!!! Thalia has the same 'not wearing her coat' thing, these days I figure if she's cold she's cold, she's not likely to get hypothermia. Or at least I hope not! I keep remembering the Toddler Taming book, about picking your battles, it's just a shame that sometimes there are so many to choose from!

Buddha I can totally understand your thoughts about ttc having been so ill. It was nothing compared to what you've been through but I picked up a bit of a bug while we were on holiday and felt v sick, and just couldn't imagine feeling that way day in day out and having to cope with DD. But in the event, although I felt sick pretty much from 5.5 weeks to 20 weeks, I really don't think DD even noticed the difference. She just watched rather more Peppa Pig than I would like, although still significantly less than she would have liked!

Just been told by my laptop that it's almost out of juice, so will post this and come back once I have a charger....

Impala Mon 27-Feb-12 21:54:23

Hello ladies,
Sorry for not coming back to thank Frazzle, Marbles and Buddha for your helpful suggestions re E's behaviour last week, you had some good ideas. I've thought about the sticker chart but I'm a bit loathe to reward her for what I consider ought to be normal behaviour IYSWIM. Or am I being too harsh? (must be the French side in me wink) Frazzle I don't know how you cope with J being like this all the time, it would drive me nuts. Marbles we may try confiscating toys if the threat not to read stories wears off. DH has threatened to put toys in the bin before now and that does tend to work quite well wink Hope the HT's words had some effect on S and you have less of a battle on your hands in the morning. One of my friends has a 9 year-old DD and she says it's a nightmare getting her off to school. Can't wait! Fortunately E was much better over the weekend thank goodness, I think lots of time spent playing with Daddy helped. I think she's going into a Daddy phase which is great for me, so far she's always clung to me but I might get a bit of breathing space at last! DH is happy too after too many months of "not want you, want mummy" sad Today she was fine at nursery. She played up in the supermarket after I picked her up as she really didn't want to go, but she was tired by then. And <bad mummy alert>, she's had a sore toe since Friday. I thought it was her shoes getting too small as it's on her largest foot and that they'd really rubbed when we spent 3 hours walking around the zoo on Friday afternoon. No, it turns out it's an infected toenail blush So after getting the pharmacist to check her over and him asking me how long she'd had it for and looking askance at me when I said since Friday blush blush, we then had to go to the walk-in centre this evening to get ABs for her, poor thing. So we I now have the joy of trying to get those down her 4 times a day. Honestly, it's one thing after another - last weekend she had an unexplained temperature which didn't turn into anything, this week it's an infected toenail... It's just one thing after another at the moment!
Marbles Ooh, Paris for your 30th too, great minds think alike! Where are you staying? We're looking at renting an apartment as it works out cheaper than a hotel and as we'll have E it's a bit more flexible. We went to Rome last new year (2010/11) and rented an apartment there and it worked really well. Looking at apartments on the Left Bank at the moment. Sadly my family doesn't live in Paris anymore although we do have friends in the suburbs.
Buddha Fingers crossed you get pg before your 40th, the week away sounds lovely. Part of me does want to hide away and forget it's happening (which is why I don't want a big party!) but on the other hand I wanted to do something a bit special.
Nemo Lovely to see you, although it sounds as though you're having a bit of a stressful time what with work, forgetting DD's blanket and her waking early. E went through a phase of that last year and it was a killer (and I wasn't pg!) I would end up just sticking a DVD on for her and trying to shut my eyes but it didn't always work. Haven't tried a Gro clock yet as E invariably wakes most nights so I end up sleeping next to her. But friends who have them say they're great. Sorry to hear about your pg worries but it sounds as though you're being closely monitored which is good.
Right, boy's names... I like Jude and Noah and also all of Frazzle's suggestions, Samuel, Thomas and Benjamin in particular. I also like Oscar, Alfie, Alexander (Alex) and Jack. Although we knew E was a girl very early on (at 12 week scan and then confirmed by 4D scan at 24 weeks), we also had Aaron as a back-up until we were 100% sure, i.e. when she was actually born!
Hope everyone else is OK!

Impala Mon 27-Feb-12 22:00:56

X-posted with Nemo! Yes, "this too shall pass" has been my mantra recently, but when?? Hopefully not too much longer... Is it a girl thing with the naughty step? I have friends with boys who sit where they're told without any problems hmm We had to physically stop E from running away from the corner when we tried that as a punishment so we stopped as it seemed pointless. I have caught her sending her toys to the corner though, so funny! She's also pretty good at imitating me saying "ça suffit!" (that's enough!) too grin

CaptainNemo Mon 27-Feb-12 22:13:01

Am back smile

Have just had to remove my (mat) jeans as they were trying to kill me..... Am SO fat! I blew up like a balloon with DD as well, so at least I know I can lose it again, but JEEZ! It's my own fault for being a greedy cow, but surely a girl has got to have some pleasures in life?!? But honestly, my legs and arse are revolting, and I literally have cellulite down to my KNEES. I know I shouldn't be outgrowing mat clothes with over 3 months to go, and yet I don't seem to have either the will power or the energy to do anything about it....

aaarggh! Just had a text from the woman we stayed with this weekend about T's blanket, was REALLY hoping she'd posted it today and it's be here tomorrow, but she's just said she's hoping to get to the post office tomorrow, or if not definitely WEDNESDAY!!! WTF?!?!?! Is that really over the top of me to have hoped that once she knew how much it meant to DD she would have gone to the post officer today?!?!? I know it's our fault for forgetting it in the first place, but given the fact that she has 2 kids I thought she'd understand how important it was.... Bugger.

Anyways, the Valentines day disaster by the way, really wasn't all that dramatic, although I was bloody angry about it for a fair while afterwards. DH was meant to be going up to london to see his ex-boss for lunch. It was vaguely work related but mainly just a jolly, which was fair enough cos he's been working bloody hard. We don't bother with valentines day much, but after he missed my 20week scan I was feeling a bit taken for granted etc so a card would have been nice... I mentioned to him that I'd heard rumours that they had shops in London, that sold nice things but FFS there's a M&S at Waterloo come to that.... I was meant to collect him late afternooon with DD who was SUPER excitied about collecting daddy from the choo choo train. But.... He got so drunk he a) left the v nice (and not cheap) brief case I gave him christmas 2010 in a bar, containing his brand new laptop b) he didn't get back til gone 8pm so I had to ask a friend to come in to watch DD (who was asleep by then) so I could collect him from the station c) he was so drunk he couldn't work out which train he was on. His phone was running out of juice so he was just using texts, and he kept texting me details of which train he was on, none of which existed according to the internet and d) when I did finally collect him he had not so much as a bunch of tulips. Not so much as a card. e) in the car on the way home, he asked what the friend who had some to watch T was doing for the rest of the evening, when I told him he said "I'm sorry it hasn't worked out that way for us" - angryangryangry I'll let you imagine the reaction he got to that one! Suffice it to say, I slept in the spare room that night! I don't really care about valentines day normally, I just felt totally taken for granted and unappreciated, and I'm still waiting for him to do something to make up for it hmm Good luck with that one!!

We're starting potty training tomorrow.... Really not sure DD's ready, though she's pretty bright so I would have thought she would be. Ordered some pants and a potty for her baby on amazon this morning, and dolly's nappies have all been packed away, we'll be a nappy free zone before you can say 'wet patch'. Or maybe not.... Wish me luck please ladies!!

hi nemosmile lovely to see you lovey grin il have a think of fave boy names and get back to yougrin

hope every one is doing wellsmile

so news from me...not TTC related thoughgrin i get made redundant in april (cant remember whether i have told you guys this info) and i have been applying for loads of jobs etc. well i was told i have a job and then last week they emailed me to say they had a recruitment freeze and rescinded my offerhmm anywho...i had a call from them today sayiong they have lifted the freeze and want me to start on mondayshock moore money, better hours and easier jobgrin good eh!!

ooo x-posted with impalasmile

we are stying in district 8 in paris i sister bhas booked most of it as shes payinggrin removing of toys/priviledges really does work for S so maybe try that.

nemo angry at your DH! have you told him how he has made you feel? FWIW i would be furious too and im clearly not preggers so not hormonal etc! i am a little angry on your behalf...

gomurray Tue 28-Feb-12 20:57:06

I have just spent half an hour typing up a mammoth post, then thanks to DP's stupid MacBook (possibly my fault for being a PC !) I have just lost the entire bloody thing - will be back once I have been for a SCREAM arrgghhhh.......

gomurray Tue 28-Feb-12 21:21:11

Right cut-down version of lost post:

impala I feel for you with your toddler trials. E turned into a textbook 2 year old a few weeks after his 2nd birthday but has been way better more recently so hopefully you will have light at the end of your 'toddler tunnel' soon too. He responded well to the naughty corner but it is useless now as he just cheekily sits in it by his own request and then fake cries - arrghhh !

Marbles does that mean you get redundancy money as well as a new a better job ?! What a stroke of luck ! Hopefully some BFP luck coming your way soon too grin

Buddha where are you in your cycle, are you feeling more up to TTC now ? Maybe we'll be TTC buddies wink

Nemo Grr at DH and his drunkeness, sounds just like the kind of thing my DP would do - so bloody annoying angry.
Love the boys names that have been mentioned, esp Jude (top 5 for me). I also like Finlay (Finn), Fraser, Ewan, Lewis, Arran - all very Scottish which is ironic as we ended up picking a Welsh name for E !
Clocks - we have Onaroo which is the best £40 I have ever spent - seriously fantastic ! E waits religiously until the clock turns green before he gets up - plus I set it a bit later at the weekend which is bliss ! I found that he was waking during the night and unsure whether it was morning as it was dark (and also dark at 7am when he gets up) so the clock allows him to know when it is morning - joy !
Potty training - what an 'interesting' stage that is ! My only advice is not to give up if there are lots of accidents initially - I think my expectations were too high at the outset. The first few days were more of a miss than a hit and I was beginning to think he was too young and not ready then all of a sudden we had more hits than misses and within a week he was pretty much dry (and clean !) I believe that they have to have the accidents to help them fully understand the consequence of not going to the potty. We did have a few nights of holding poos until nappy went on at bedtime but that passed quickly. Then a few weeks in he regressed with poos which was a nightmare (possibly my lowest parenting week yet) but again it passed when he decided to conform again. The whole stage was far less demanding that I had imagined but I do know friends who have had a really tough time (mainly boys though). We used a Potette for out and about which was a life saver as you can't always be within a minute or 2 of a loo in the early stages grin GOOD LUCK !!
Oh and embrace your PG-fat - I hated it when people kept telling me I was tiny as I approached 20 weeks as I suspected I was too small which is not good - far better to be a great big hiefer with a healthy baby - like you said you can lose it afterwards and given you'll have T to run after as well as a newborn you'll lose it in no time !

Nowt to report from here - AF due then I'm counting down the days until TTC - yippeeee ! Start acupuncture on Sat - am hoping it isn't so successful that it gives me a 28 day cycle as DP will be away at the crucial stage - arrghhh ! Am hoping for a slightly elongated cycle - a wee 31-dayer would suit !!!

Where is everyone? smile

Hope all is well for all...

I have decided to turn the job down as I went for a meeting with the HR people and it turns out the recruitment woman wildly exaggerated the job description, wages and potential of the jobhmm I decided that rather than go for a crap job just to have a job, I will stick where I am and keep applying for something bettersmile DH want too pleased but he loves his job and sat on his arse for 9 months until he found it so a bit of understanding would be good...

frazzlerock Fri 02-Mar-12 08:10:18

I'm here! Going to have a good read through at lunchtime. Been feeling rather weak and dizzy after this stupid fad three day diet. I might say some weird things.....

gomurray Mon 05-Mar-12 13:28:50

Hello ladies - where are you all ?...

Marbles hope you are ok missus, sounds like you made the right decision, even if you DH is not being very supportive. When do you finish up ?

frazzle what crazy diet are you doing ? Surely you really don't need to ?...

Well it is all go here. AF arrived rather suddenly on Thu - unfortunately I had E with me and had to take him with my into the loo as we were about to go into his swimming lesson - I tried to be descreet but Mr nosey just had to have a look in the loo blush shock The poor boy just turned to me in complete shock and said "what kind of pee pee did you do mummy ?" eeek ! I have probably scarred him for life !!! I managed to distract him quite successfully but am still waiitng for him to announce to someone that mummy did a red pee !!!
Anyway, first post-MC AF has been and gone - hurray ! So a few practise days then we are up and running finally TTC - whopppeee !
I also had my first acupuncture session on Saturday - it was all good apart fro me finding the Chinese Dr very tricky to understand (some hilarious misunderstandings did occur !) I found the whole thing far more relaxing than I'd expected - not unpleasant atall. However the same cannot be said for the 'raw herbs' that he 'prescribed' me to boil and drink - absolutely disgusting, they make me gag but apaprently they are "preapring my body for pregnancy" so I'm persevering ! Not only that but the herbs cost as much as the acupuncture so I'll be bankrupt by the time I conceive !


murray nice to see you and so glad Af has been and gone... GL with TTCsmile im thinking of trying devising a way to hide the charges from DH...

i myself have TTCed like mad, got a BFP saturday afternoon (CD27)and then Af arrived (early!) on sunday morninghmm i am choosing to ignore the BFP part as if i had been patient and waited until Af was due (tomorrow incidentally) i would have been none the wiser... hey ho...i will have to sex up DH this cycle and im thinking of trying agnus castus too...anyone tried it?

gomurray Tue 06-Mar-12 12:55:36

Hi Marbles So sorry you are having another messed up month - have you tried the baby asprin ? I believe that it is used for clotting issues which can cause implantation issues ..? Are you planning to report this to the hospital/consultant/whoever is dealing with your lupus and its effects on TTC ?.. It is all very strange that you seem to have no problem fertilising an egg but it just won't stick. As for agnus castus - I tried it when I started TTC and had my longest cycle EVER - about 50-60 days if my memory serves me correctly - it was awful as was convinced was PG due to lateness of AF and body doing funny PG things like tingly boobs - I'd definitely be very wary of it unless you are sure it is right for your issues.
You are sounding very positive though missus, good on you xx

murray i take the 75mg asprin for the lupus treatment already but i was told that taking this pre-implantation can cause implantation defect so im balancing up the benefits of taking it for lupus and not taking it for the last 2 weeks of my cycle to aid implantation...dunno yet though...

BuddhaBelly Tue 06-Mar-12 19:16:25

Marbles can't add much to Murrays post about the bfp/af sad sorry to hear about your job but I don't blame you for not taking up the offer I'm sure dh will come round eventually wink
Murray glad you enjoyed the acupuncture although not the herbs so much smile
Apologies for lack of personals but I'm away on a course so on app and relying on my awful memory!
Ttc is back on track think I've got over my worries grin but like Impala really struggling with E's behaviour sad angry had a terrible week of it last wk but have to say Monday we had a whole day of no time out and he was a joy smile now if we could have a few more like that it would be brilliant grin doesn't help that I have get constant digs from my mum and nan because I refuse to hit him and that's their parenting style. I've tried ignoring them but when your not v confident it really knocks you for six sad

Impala Wed 07-Mar-12 10:18:40

Hello ladies,
Murray Glad AF has been and gone and you can get down to some serious TTC-ing smile Pleased you found the acupuncture relaxing although the herbal concoction sounds foul! My acupuncturist didn't do all the herbal stuff so I escaped that. I'm sure the pain will be worth it though!
I had to smile about the red pee, E has asked me so many times "what are you doing mummy?", "what's that?" etc. It's a nightmare when you don't get any privacy in the loo! I've given very basic answers to her questions so far. I was having a discussion with a friend the other day who has a 15 year-old DD who started AF at the age of 9 shock and she was saying she's always been perfectly honest about AF with both her DD and her 9 year-old DS from a very young age, explained why it happens etc. Marbles have you had any similar questions from S? And how did you handle it? It sounds as though you've made the right decision about the job by the way, something better will come along I'm sure. Thanks for your Linked-In invitation by the way smile And sorry to hear about the BFP which turned straight into AF sad I keep forgetting, when are you due to see your consultant again?
Buddha Hope you're enjoying your time away, even if it is for a course! I feel your pain with the behaviour issues. It just colours everything doesn't it? And it's even harder if family members are sticking their oar in. E has been better the past couple of weeks, it does seem to come and go in phases. However, after reading various threads on here I borrowed this book from the library: and so far it's worked really well. It's really easy to apply the concepts and you can start immediately. E has been sent to her bedroom just twice in the past week and missed a go at trampolining yesterday and that's been it. Completely different to two weeks ago! I've had great success with setting a kitchen timer/mobile phone alarm to get her to do something within a certain time and she loves the challenge of trying to beat the clock! Can't believe I didn't think of that before. I've also got this one too: which I've started to read and it also seems to make a lot of sense. Perhaps you could get your mum and nan to read them too and they'll realise that things have moved on since their day and hopefully they will then support your choices. It's so hard though, especially being consistent all the time.
Hope everyone else is OK! Haven't heard from PickledMoomin in a while, saw on FB that she's not very well sad
Frazzle Hope the drastic diet worked and that you're back to normal now!

Hi ladiessmile
S has asked the same questions impala and I told her its the comfy bed in mummy's womb that's made for a new baby to sleep in and it's natures way of changing the sheets ready for the baby. It doesn't hurt etc and it won't get changed if a baby decides to grow in theresmile she likes that explanation and it's a roundabout way of preparing her and she doesn't worry now as she tried to put a plaster on my belly the first time she sawgrin she has said its ""ascustin" and never comin outa my penny" grin (disgusting and she won't be having periodsgrin) she potentially could only have 3/4 years left without themsad good news E is behaving a bit better now! It does happen in phases and S is being really good recently! The HT announced in assembly that he will visit the children who are consistently late in class and I think she was a bit shaken by that and has vastly improved in the morningssmile

Hope everyone else is ok

I heard from moomin the other day and she's ok but still not able to use her laptop so hard to postsmile

buddha hope you are oksmile the behaviour issues aside obvsad it is so frustrating it it definitely a case of cracking what works and that can be quite a process. Like I said it WILL get better and you are most certainly NOT doing anything wrong. Be firm and stand your ground (united front with DH. Helps a lot too) dont listen to the smacking brigade ( my mums exactly the same) and parent your boy how YOU think is best. We are here to listen too and if you have any wobbles I'm at the end of the phone anytime {{{big hugs}}}

BuddhaBelly Wed 07-Mar-12 15:14:10

Impala spookily I bought the how to talk book last week haven't had chance to read it (should have packed it blush) it's good to know that someone else recommends it.
Marbles Thank you smile I did mention to mum about reading a thread on here a few weeks ago about smacking but had second thoughts when it became quite heated and talked about people that snack are crap parents etc thought it was a bit harsh!

BuddhaBelly Wed 07-Mar-12 17:31:50

Marbles meant to say I love that explanation you gave S about af etc smile

Impala Wed 07-Mar-12 19:20:59

Marbles That's a great way of explaining it, I'll definitely use that next time the question crops up, thank you smile
Buddha Agree with Marbles and I should have said in my last post that you're definitely not doing anything wrong, you're doing a great job with E. We all get so many conflicting messages about parenting these days that it's hard to know which way to turn and who to listen to. We'll have to compare notes on the book once we've both read it!

gomurray Wed 07-Mar-12 22:14:53

Ladies - evening ! I have been straight on to order the effective discipline book grin. E is generally well behaved but seem to pick his moments to play up (in front of my 'perfect mummy' friends !) so def keen to find some useful tips.

Buddha where are you in your cycle ? I am starting to SWI from the weekend - exciting ! Must try to remember that just because I am ovulating does NOT mean I will get PG first time - must remember patience !

impala glad to hear E is behaving a bit better. How did you feel when you had acupuncture ? I am soo tired - I feel my eyes starting to close at 9pm every night and even at work today I was so so sleepy ! It is a strangely nice feeling though and I have been sleeping brilliantly and having loads of dreams (Dr did ask if I had dreams so I wonder if that is significant). It may be the herbs that make me sleepy but either way I am convinced it is doing me good grin

Nemo where are you my dear ? Hopefully not too busy working mrs xx

Sorry to hear Moomin is unwell, hope it is nothing serious.

BuddhaBelly Wed 07-Mar-12 22:50:06

Murray Moomin has a water infection but started antib's today so hopefully will be better soon. We're cycle buddies! I should ov at the weekend too grin If I don't get pg this month then this will be the longest time it has taken since the initial wait of two years pre the m/cs sad no pressure there then grin

BuddhaBelly Sun 11-Mar-12 08:07:10

How come when it's my turn (once in a blue moon) for a lie in I can't sleep sad

gomurray Sun 11-Mar-12 20:26:42

Oh no poor you Buddha how irritating !

I had a wee long lie this morning after a boozy night/afternoon out which was great fun grin. Had a bit of a shock this morning when temp was VERY high and panicked that yesterday's acupuncture session had caused a very early Ov (cd 11 !) but am now convinced it was the gin that caused the rise. I know that alcohol can cause a high temp but I have never seen such a sky high temp caused just by alcohol - but then I did have a LOT so hopefully that is all it was as this morning was the first SWI so if rise is ov then we missed the boat - fingers crossed for a low temp tmrw.

Buddha how did your ov weekend go - do you think you timed it well ?

Where is everyone ?

BuddhaBelly Wed 14-Mar-12 10:20:14

murray sounds like you had a good night out smile I think we have timed it alright and can obsess relax and wait grin

Hi buddhagrin sounds good that you timed things rightsmile DH and I have been trying but failing this cyclehmm DH is working long hours and is shattered and I seem to have another illness ATMhmm chest pain on the right side and very dragging the docs later...again.

Hope everyone else is ok smile

BuddhaBelly Sun 18-Mar-12 07:44:22

Marbles Hope your feeling better? I've been poorly again too getting do fed up of being I'll sad

Well I'm here to do a Nemo style rant angry about mothers day. Dh asked me weeks ago if there was anything I particularly wanted as he's crap with present buying hmm I bookmarked a couple of things on laptop so he could pick something (don't expect gold or diamonds just a small gift as a token) but he didn't bother and took a chicken poxed tantruming E to town against my advice and returned rather quickly as E played up stating I couldn't get anything so I'll order something online. Ive now deleted my bookmarks as I don't want anything after the day (petty I know) dh works at weekends on a pub door so I knew I wouldn't get a lie in usually gets in about 1.30/2am but rolled in drunk at 4am angry he's never gone out after work and I wouldn't have minded if he'd let me know and picked a different day! I've got mil coming round this morning the way things are going I'll have to entertain her on my own as he'll be hungover! Maybe he'll surprise me and take me out for lunch hmm so girls AIBU to moan?

BuddhaBelly Sun 18-Mar-12 09:34:01

Happy mothers day to you all smile

Forgot that with my rant blush grin

gomurray Sun 18-Mar-12 20:52:13

Happy Mother's Day ladies !

Buddha you are definitely not being unreasonable to complain about DH's behaviour - remember this when it is Father's Day wink. Just as well you ov'd last weekend and not this weekend wink. So.... any symptoms to report other than feeling ill again ? Not long until you POAS.... exciting !

I will not be joining you as egg has still not arrived - not a complete shock for me as tend to have longer than 28 cycles. DP was away last week so a blessing that ov delayed. BD'd last night as had EWCM during the day but it then disappeared and today's temp above coverline - probably due to drinks last night wink as opposed to ov though... More EWCM (blood streaked !!) today so suspect I have a few more days to go. Am just praying that I do not have a repeat of last month's on/off messing with my head ov symptoms then weeks and weeks for egg to arrive... fingers crossed.

Where is everyone else hiding ? Nemo, bump update please !

Mother's Day rather more successful here, DS made me a lovely card at nursery (so much more appreciated and treasured than a shop bought one) and he also bought me some Jo Malone hand cream - clever boy grin and DP cooked dinner for me grin - feeling very lucky - all I need now is an egg and then a BFP - not much to ask surely...wink

Hello lovely ladies,

I'm sorry I haven't been around much. I'm stalking you all but I haven't had the time to post- currently using phone (again) so it's impossible to remember what's been said since I last posted.

I'm well, work is busy. I'm looking forward to three weeks off for Easter.

Life at home is comfortable. Still living in the same house as D. We're doing alternate weekends with the kids but everything is amicable though he's annoyed me recently (broke my mother's day pressie that L made, gave her permanent marker which went through her paper and on to the table.... I bet you're bored already!).

I went to London last weekend. It was lovely to catch up with friends. I miss the kids like crazy when they are with D but I call constantly and look forward to spending the following weekend with them.

L is a delight at the moment. I occasionally see a teenager in her but she's generally very settled, happy and funny. She's doing really well in school, and I spend most of my time driving her to out of school activities.

J is a monkey. Terrible twos- doesn't eat, still doesn't sleep, is very strong willed. He makes me laugh constantly. His obsession with poo, boogies and willies are new to me. L was never interested. He enjoys nothing better than calling someone a bird poo or a boogie beard. And he's so physical. I feel like I spend all day chasing him. I'm adjusting slowly.

Please keep posting. It's great to hear from you grin

CaptainNemo Thu 22-Mar-12 22:58:51

Hello ladies smile so sorry I've been away for so long, am rubbish.

Buddha am amused/slightly concerned by the idea of a "Nemo style rant" wink - although not to disappoint you, I could do a few more rants since I last posted... Not least about the fact that for mothers day I got..... nada. Nothing. Zilch. Not a card, noy anything. Which, coming after the valentines day debacle wasn't quite what I was hoping for..... Murray am LOVING the jo malone hand cream present, that's much more what I had in mind! Did I mention before that DH works next door to a card shop and 2 doors from a florist?!?! He didn't manage to write the card (I made him buy) for his mum either, so I supppose at least I'm not the only one he doesn't appreciate?! But Buddha I'm sorry you had such aou on crap day. Why are they so rubbish?!?! It's not fecking complicated after all!!!! Hope you're doing ok now though.

Murray what CD are you on now? Glad the SWI is going well wink Am keeping everything crossed for you!

Marbles I hope you're feeling better now? You really have had too much to cope with lately sad

Ok, so you'd be disappointed if there was no rant, right? hmm Had a consultant's appt this aft, have been seeing him either 4 weekly or fortnightly cos cervix got a bit shorter a while ago and they're keeping a close eye on it in case I need a stitch (looking v unlikely). But as I suspected, the baby is ginormous. So they want me to go for a glucose tolerance test on monday (appt not til 10 - may starve to death by 1pm...) in case it's gestational diabetes...

Am feeeling v grumpy about it. I hate being pg (and I suck at it), am extremely worried about giving birth to a whopping baby, being split from ear to ear again, and in all liklihood having no f-ing pain relief as it'll all happen too quickly. Actually think I might be a bit traumatised from last time, am just really scared of things going wrong and of the level of pain that I experienced last time.....

Rant rant rant. Sorry. I know I'm worrying about something that might never happen (GD not having to give birth!) and I know it's better to know if he has got it, so we (I) can do everything we (I) can to make sure he's healthy, but it's really unsettled me.....Gah. Why are things never straightforward huh? Sorry for the moan (That Nemo, she's only on here when she wants something/something goes wrong... blush)

CaptainNemo Thu 22-Mar-12 23:01:37

X posts Moomin - it's like buses hey? wink Glad things are as ok as they can be in the circumstances. xx

gomurray Sat 24-Mar-12 11:18:47

Hello lovely ladies, so good to see some action on this thread - was concerned I'd killed it with my 'missing egg' chat wink

Firstly... Buddha how are you mrs ? must be time to test if no AF by now... Please pop on and let us know, have everything crossed for you, been thinking of you these past few days xxx

Moomin great to hear from you, glad to hear all going as well as can be expected given your less than ideal situation with DH. How was London, did you see your ex while you were there ?... DS sounds like a typical little boy, bursting with energy and cheek ! So much fun but so exhausting.

Nemo thank you for updating us - I was going to text you for a bump update as it has been aaages ! How many weeks are you now, surely into the 3rd trimester ? Not so good about the large baby and potential GD - like you say it hasn't been confirmed as yet and I don't know much about it TBH (other than it means big baby and I guess you'd have to alter diet ?...) but I'm certain it is better that you know about it and have it treated/monitored. Why can't being PG just be straightforward for you ? Also, I hope you gave DH a stern talking to after neglecting you Mother's Day - unforgivable when you are carrying his son and having a tough PG into the bargain. HUGS xx

Well my egg is still being stubborn - grrrrr...! I have had plentiful EWCM these past few days, gradually increasing as it should, then a temp dip yesterday so was 99% sure that this morning was my thermal shift day but no - FFS ! I was so convinced that I took temp twice then decided thermometer was pants so tried my backup thermometer !!!! Anyway, am now praying for tomorrow and not yet another false alarm where EWCM dries up and body starts trying all over again for the next 4-5 days. Am now on cd24 angry BORED OF WAITING ! On the plus side it means I can polish off the yummy wine I cracked open last night - every cloud.. wink Acupuncture going well - had an appt this morning which was fine apart from finding out that I should be drinking the 'raw herb tea' warm not cold - Dr told me that explains why I am not improving as much as he'd hoped - arrrghhh ! The only way I can stomach the God awful stuff is to down it cold with my breath held then immediately down fresh orange juice afterwards. My colleague who was due the week before me started Maternity leave last week which was tough but am hoping that not seeing her bump every day will make life easier at work. The other PG girl at work is due to go off when I'm on holiday - phew ! Only 3 weeks now until I jet off to sunny Lanzarote - BRING IT ON !

Hello to all the other lovely ladies - what is your news ?...

CaptainNemo Sun 25-Mar-12 17:31:46

Oh Murray Lanzarote! envy Hopefully should do you the world of good though, and you certainly deserve it! Seeing the girl waved off by everyone and presumably given presents must have been HORRIBLE sad but as you say, at least you don't have to see her from now on. And fingers crossed, by the time she comes back you'll be on mat leave yourself! I remember the raw herb tea < boak> I used to drink mine luke warm, just cool enough that I could down it in one whilst holding my nose, exactly as you describe! Filthy stuff. But if it works def worth it! Good luck. You're right about the GD of course, def better to know if I do have it. Am fretting. It seems I have quite a complicated relationship with food while I'm preggers, though luckily not really the rest of the time, and I'm really not sure how I'll cope with no sugar and ding hungry all the time, though I'm aware of how pathetic that sounds and that there are far worse things....
I tried talking to DH last night about how I was feeling about everything. He pretty much rolled over and went to sleep without reacting at all which meant I couldn't sleep sad then was up again ALOT in the night then with DD at (old) 6.30 so shattered today... That'll make for a nice rational conversation about it all later then.... hmm
Am writing this on my new toy. Have been thinking about getting an iPad for ages, since my accountant told me I can have it as 100% business expense and I really could do with one for work, so I took the plunge on Friday and got one. Figured I may as well get it before the end of the tax year. It's wifi only but have tethered it to my iPhone (£10 per month on Vodafone hmm sure it can be done more cheaply somehow...) so I can use it out and about as well - like now, in the car on the m25 on the way back from Ipswich visiting the godchildren.
And at least it means I can mn without having to use the god awful app wink. Will be good to have it at the hospital tomorrow as well, will need to pass the time somehow.....

Buddha - what she said grin update please! Hope you're feeling ok about things whatever the news, and that DH has made up for his appalling behaviour last weekend.... As I said, no apology here....

How is everyone else? Quite a few animals have been AWOL for a while, maybe we should go and give them a nudge on fb to get them to come and see us wink

Right. DD asleep so will maybe take the opportunity to try to talk to DH again. Not optimistic.... xx

BuddhaBelly Sun 25-Mar-12 20:37:52

Quickie as I'm watching dancing on ice final grin
Af one day late but two poas later still -ve so just waiting for af to arrive feel ok (ish) about it bit angry as I put a lot of effort in this month wink I'm beginning to think maybe my eggs are no longer fresh grin

Murray Good news that pg lady has now finished work but boo for missing egg. Any news on that? Your herb tea sounds awful tbh grin but if it does the trick drink up wink
Nemo No apology here either needless to say there will be no Fathers day in our house grin A Nemo style rant is not a bad thing honest. Bugger can't remember what else I was going to say and can't see on app angry

Will be back tomorrow for proper post promise smile

gomurray Sun 25-Mar-12 21:57:09

Buddha ooh that is good that AF is late, maybe just tested too soon, you testing again tomorrow assuming no AF ?... Everything crossed for good news mrs xx

Impala Mon 26-Mar-12 19:26:23

Sorry ladies, I've been really rubbish at posting of late, been very busy and not had much time for anything.
Sorry some of you had such rubbish Mother's Days, I think Buddha's suggestion of no Father's Day is great grin DH and I were away at a wedding without E that weekend but we did get back early afternoon and enjoyed a late lunch at my mum's with E smile I was given this book and a huge box of chocolates. E also made me a lovely card and a pasta necklace at nursery, which I will treasure. I remember as a teenager asking my mum why on earth she'd kept all the rubbish delightful things my sister and I had made at playgroup and primary school (which she still has incidentally!). Now I do understand!
Gomurray Really hope your body stops playing tricks on you, so frustrating sad The herbal concoction sounds foul, hope you manage to find a way to drink it warm and keep it down. Very envy of your trip to Lanzarote btw, it will be lovely. And good news that you won't have to keep dealing with your two pg colleagues when you get back.
Buddha Keeping my fingers crossed for you!
Nemo Sorry to hear about possible GD, how did things go today? Did you get the results or do you have to wait for them? Sorry to hear you're having such a rough time with being pg. On the home straight now though - when is your due date exactly? Did you ever speak to anyone about your fears about tearing again and the possibility of a C-section? I think if you feel that is the best option for you this time around then you should definitely try pushing for one. Didn't the government announce recently that all women who wanted a C-section should have one or something or have I got that totally wrong? Obviously it's not a decision to be taken lightly but if you know it's at least an option for you if that's what you want then you might be able to relax a little.
On a brighter note, I love your accountant's reasoning about the iPad, might have to consider getting one before April 5th wink Although given that we're about to have an extension built (if the bank actually agrees to give us a mortgage [anger]) then perhaps it's not a necessity at the moment blush
Moomin Lovely to hear from you and pleased things are as OK as they can be with DH at the moment. Love the pictures of your trip to London on FB, looks as though you had a lovely time smile
All OK here, apart from I've had this virus which has been going around. Starts off like flu with a temp and aches and pains but not quite as bad. However, it makes you feel rubbish for well over a week and ends up as a stinking cold, which I've still got Nice! E had an ear infection a couple of weeks ago but fortunately is better now. We're going to visit friends in Brussels this w/e - this is the trip we had to cancel last month because E was ill so really hoping nothing goes wrong this time!
Hope everyone else is OK.

CaptainNemo Tue 27-Mar-12 08:51:21

Morning smile how is everyone today? I have a cold..... Boo! But at least it's sunny. Thanks for the good wishes for yesterday, it was fine, though I'd heard from other people that the sugary drink makes you feel quite sick, and they weren't kidding. But noting as bad as ms so a doddle really! Haven't been told how long it'll take to get the results but my gp friend reckons the surgery should have either got them yesterday aft or should get them later today so I'll hassle call them about it later and I'll keep you posted. My latest paranoia is that I'm not feeling as much movement as I have been, but I think (hope) that it's just because he had an exceptionally active weekend and now he's just gone back to normal levels which therefore feels less.....

Impala Brussels trip sounds great! Will keep my fingers crossed that it all goes smoothly for you this time round. How long are you going for? We've been away the last couple of weekends and tbh I'm really looking forward to a quiet one this weekend, especially if this weather holds [crosses fingers...]

Moomin I saw something on fb about London but I haven't looked at the pics yet, will have to go and have a nose!

Murray any sign of that missing egg yet? I know it won't be what you want to hear, but it might take your body a couple of cycles to settle down. With temping hopefully you'll know as soon as it's ready and I'm sure you'll catch the egg as soon as it's there to catch. At least you know that with the acupuncture and the foul herbs your body will be in the best possible position to carry a pg when it does happen.

Buddha sorry about the -ve's, that sucks.... If you're worried about egg quality is it worth talking to the gp about whether there are any blood tests you can have or would you be happier not medicalising things too much? I'm certainly guilty of that, just ends up giving me more things to worry about... Come and let us know how you're doing, I've been thinking of you. And remember, you had E when you weren't sure that it would ever happen, so there's no reason why it shouldn't happen again. Hope that doesn't sound blasé, hopefully you know what I mean.

Right then. Better get moving. Am looking forward to seeing lots of posts on here next time I come in. I'll bring cake if that'll help?!? grin

hi everyone!!smile

glad to see people around recentlysmile

DH and I took DD to the lakes for the night and to south lakes wild animal park on friday/saturdaysmile we had a lovely weekend (and DH and i managed to BD too overcoming adversity from the B&Bs supremely squeaky bed and DD talking in her sleepblush)


how has everyone been? my brain is mushy today so i cant remember anythinghmm and im in work too so can sneak a bit inbetween working...last tuesday EVER in this shitty job so onwards and upwards from here...

Impala Tue 27-Mar-12 21:30:53

What gorgeous weather today smile I hope it's been the same for all of you, could get used to this! We spent part of the day at Jimmy's Farm and had a lovely time and enjoyed a picnic in the sunshine smile
Nemo I meant to say in my last post that next time you go to Ipswich you should drop in - we're literally just off the A12 outside Colchester! Have you been to Jimmy's Farm with the godchildren? If not then you should go, T would love all the animals. In answer to your question, we're in Brussels for 4 days so that will be nice. We've had busy weekends all this month actually, with another wedding on Easter Sunday so I think we won't be doing anything for the rest of April!
Glad the GTT went well this morning despite the disgusting stuff they make you drink and hopefully you should get the results back tomorrow. Fingers crossed for you. As for reduced movements, you'll know better than anyone else what feels normal, but if you're at all worried then contact your mw or hospital and ask to be monitored just to make sure.
Marbles Sounds like a lovely weekend smile The Lakes are lovely. Fingers crossed you made a baby whilst you were there! Is it Friday you finish your job? Bet you can't wait! Are you starting the new one on Monday or have you taken holiday between the two?
Hope everyone is OK smile

gomurray Tue 27-Mar-12 22:48:20

Hello ladies - lots of animals in the zoo recently, just how I like it !

Nemo glad the test is over, let us know when you hear.

Impala wowsers Brussels sounds lovely, lucky you !

Marbles 10/10 for BDing with squeaky bed and sleeping child - a medal is winging its way to you !!

Buddha I assume your absence is because AF arrived, pop back when you are ready missus, we are here to listen/cheer you on xx

No news from here - have a similar bug to impala, tiredness, weak, achey which now seems to have passed and now just have the trots which is not a big deal except it means SWI is on hold so sod's law dictates that I will no doubt ov soon sad. I will be soooooo angry if we miss the egg because of this stupid bug. Anyway, have another small concern. I have had 2 episodes during this cycle where I have had pink/blood tinged EWCM - both lasted a day or 2. Anyone have any experience of this/advice ? Obviously I googled it and got various results - the most worrying (which matches my situation) is that my body is approaching menopause so there is less oestrogen so despite best efforts my body keeps failing to ov - this is exactly what it feels like as have had several patchy days of EWCM then it dries up and the process starts again - been happening for over 16 days now sad. I am trying so hard to be philosophical about it all and not worry too much, but I should be going on mat leave this week and it has hit me harder than I had expected sad. The next few weeks are going to be tougher than I'd hoped and am alredy dreading announcement of my friend's baby's arrival sad. Arrgghhh so much for keeping my chin up - sorry ladies xx

murray sadsad {{{{big squashy cuddle}}} here is the place where you really don't have to keep your chin upsadsad I'm so sorry you are finding things hard ATM sad keep talking... I'm around lurking most of the time so you always have at least me to listen to you/shoulder to cry on...

WRT the no Ov/mid-cycle spotting... Have you tried the B100 complex I was rattling about? It's shortened my cycle and boosts progesterone apparantly so helps with LP... Also I have bought Agnus castus for next cycle if we haven't gotten lucky this one which is natures answer to clomid according to reliable sources... Might be worth a look

gomurray Wed 28-Mar-12 12:56:45

Marbles thanks or being there mrs - much appreciated - I went to bed last night thinking that I had most probably killed the thread again with my moaning !

Anyway, guess what - sod's law did indeed take effect as my temp rose today ! Obviously I have to wait a day or 2 to ensure it is not a 'blip' (esp as have been ill). It is so funny, as I have been on high alert for the past 4 weeks and as soon as I get so pee'd off with it all and start to ignore the signs it happens ! Anyway no SWI last night so Sunday was the last one - still in with a chance but def not getitng hopes up esp as have been poorly.

Marbles on the subject of vits - I have taken agnus castus before when TTC E and it gave me my longest ever cycle and loads of symptoms so it was a hellish 4ww with a BFN at the end of it ! I have also heard loads of positive stoires about it though - just be careful as it can have the oposite of the desired effect for some women. NB the 4ww wasn't actually an extended LP - it was because it took wel over 28 days to ovulate ! I thnk what Nemo said about my body needing more than 1 cycle to get back to 'normal' is true. I know from reading the MC threads a while back that a lot of those ladies at least 2 'WTF cycles' as they refer to them ! I just have to be patient - not in my nature as we all know !

Nemo any results yet ?

gomurray Wed 28-Mar-12 19:52:47

Marbles just been doing a wee agnus castus search on MN and here is a typical thread - very mixed reviews. Like one lady says it is like marmite - love it or hate it. It can definitely help but can also mess cycles up further if hormones imbalanced.
Do you have specific cycle issues you are trying to fix ?

Hey murraysmile

I have the feeling that I'm not Ov every month... About 1 in 3 by my reckoning and I thought...what the hell! It can't hurt to try it... I have bought it but I'm not 100% sure I will even take it yet...

Hope you are ok {{{{hug}}}} hope you are feeling a little better xxx

It's my EDD for my very first MC tomorrowsad my baby would have been 9yo if all had gone wellsad

Mummylimited Thu 29-Mar-12 20:08:26

Hello everyone (enters shame faced after long absence and brings CAKE to make up for it) blush

Haven't read through everything, but it seems that some of you are still going through it with TTC sad I am keeping everything crossed that we have some good news from all of you soon. It is so frustrating and every maternity leave starting or EDD just makes it all harder. Lots of hugs to gomurray Buddha and Marbles. You all amaze me.

Nemo How are you doing? How long to you have left and remind me, did you find our the flavour?

frazzle Are you still frazzle? I must just say your running is amazing. I always notice the updates on twitter and can't believe you are doing those distances. I am in awe.

Anyway, we have had one of those lovely (pretty rare) days where everything goes to plan. The children have been delightful and even napped at the same time, so I am going to top it off with an early night too xxx

Will be back SOON

gomurray Mon 02-Apr-12 13:42:58

Hello Ladies

Good to see you Mummy, where are the rest of you ?...

News from here is that I am not great - in fact am freaking out. I am 6dpo today and had some brown blood - quite a bit with no sign of red (I have had implantation spotting both of my PGS but it was about 9dpo and pinky/red/brown). This is different def just brown and a bit watery - my first thought was "ectopic". Following the initial hour of blind panic and almost blubbing at my desk I managed to calm down and met DP for lunch. I explained all to him and he has been great - I just needed him to know that if I collapse he needs to tell medics that I had suspected ectopic ! I'm sure he thinks I am off my head but he is being very understanding. Anyway, subsequent trips to the loo have revealed no more blood so am going to sit it out and if I do get a BFP at the wknd/early next week I will contact MW and ask if there is any way they can test me for ectopic - I think they do bloods - there will be nothing to see on a scan so early. The main reason I'm now freaking out is that we go on holiday on 2 weeks (when I'd be 5 weeks assuming BFP) and ectopic rupture would most likely happen while I was away - I am not prepared to rely on foreign hospitals to deal with this as it is potentially life threatning. Apologies ladies, you know that I am not generally a panicker but this is just too scary. Hopefully I'm just over-analyzing and worrying before anything has actually happened.
breathe and relax

CaptainNemo Tue 03-Apr-12 10:05:50

Ah Murray bless you! How are you feeling about things today? If it helps, the type of spotting you're describing sounds EXACTLY like what I had with this pg, brown and watery 6 or 7DPO. Then had more of a similar type the day af was due, think I even put a tampon in as was working and just assumed it was the start of my period as thought there was such a slim chance that I could be pg, but it stopped, and a couple of days later I decided I should prob do a test.... Spotting continued to about 10.5 weeks then red bleed at 12 weeks, was the most stressful start to a pregnancy, but apparently baby was unaffected by it all, bad for mummy's mental health but not for baby it seems! Fingers crossed it'll be the same for you. Though hopefully without any more mental anguish!
It's a v personal decision, but having had bloods done with Thomas and ending up on a complete emtotional roller coaster I personally wouldn't go down that route again, my understanding is that they're not definitive in any event. At 5 weeks although a scan wouldn't show a hb it should show a sac in the right place. Would you consider a private scan a couple of days before you go if you're still worried, if the NHS won't oblige?
I really hope you wont mind me saying, but the worries you're experiencing sound very similar to the concerns I had just before we went on holiday after we lost Thomas, and in the end I think it was all tied up with the grieving process. I was so worried something was going to go wrong, we really needed the break and I just couldn't believe it would all work out the way we'd planned when nothing else had. As I recall, I half convinced myself DH had a terminal illness... It was the grieving chapter of the Lesley Regan mc book that made me realise what I was doing. It may be different for you, but do you think that might in part explain the level of panic you're feeling? I'm not saying you should totally ignore the possibility of an ectopic but could that be why the worries feel so over powering?
We're all here if there's anything we can do. Big hug to you xx

CaptainNemo Tue 03-Apr-12 10:18:55

Hello to everyone else, sorry for being AWOL. Have had a stinking cold and been extremely rough and exhausted but on the mend now hopefully. FINALLY got blood results yesterday after chasing the hospital for them hmm and apparently all fine. Am still concerned about the size of the baby and want to discuss it further, but will have I wait for now. Am seeing the consultant on the 19th and am trying (so far unsuccessfully) to get an appt with my gp before that to see what she says... My thinking is that labour may well be significantly quicker than it was with DD, who only took 6.5 hours and that having been told she was on the 50th centile she turned out to be 8lb9, whereas this one is already showing up as massive. So if 8lb9 left me with a 3rd degree tear what's a significantly larger baby going to do to me?!?! Maybe don't answer that.... I'm pretty sure I don't want an elcs, so I guess the only real question is whether they'd consider inducing me early, which I know may not work anyway and increases the possibility of an emcs.... There are just n easy answers are there?!

Sorry for the me me me post, and for not commenting on everyone's news but I really need to go and do some work now..... Widh me luck? Love to all!

gomurray Tue 03-Apr-12 20:30:30

Nemo thank you so, so much for your lovely post. As always you are so right. I am struggling to imagine things going right this time. The blood has disappeared so am trying just to forget all about it until the weekend when I plan to test. Am due on Monday but going out for dinner on Sat so would like a glass of wine if not PG. Ideally I'd wait to see if AF arrives/temp drops but the temptation of wine is too strong wink. On the bright side, if am not PG then I can drink even more wine on my holiday grin

Nemo you poor thing worrying about a giant baby. FWIW if you do end up going down the CS route it is not all bad (no contractions and pushing nonsense). It does take a few weeks to heal completely but within about 5 days you will feel pretty normal. I healed really quickly - I took arnica homeopathic pills for several weeks prior to due date and I swear they made all the difference. I know several women my age who took a lot longer to recover. Ideally you will go into labour naturally while baby smaller - I know a vaginal delivery is what nature intended but don't fear the alternative wink Was DD on time/late ? How many weeks are you now ?

Hello lurking animals !

CaptainNemo Tue 03-Apr-12 21:27:32

Ah thanks Murray, and I'm glad you're feeling better! A bit of wine won't do your little bean any harm, even if you are preggers. I seem to remember I had quite a bit the night I found out I was pg this time, needed it to cope with the shock!

Am officially 30 weeks today, EDD is 12/06/12. DD was born 2 days after her EDD but actually on the date I thought she was due. FWIW I think this one is due on either 16th or 17th June (who has the energy to have sex on a tuesday?!? wink) If he hasn't put in an appearance by then I'll be going for a sweep by the same mw who violated helped me last time on 14/06/12. Poor little chap is just doing the best he can, while his evil mummy spends all her time planning his eviction! xx

gomurray Thu 05-Apr-12 21:01:58

Hello ladies !

nemo LOL at you evicting your poor wee boy ! You have good reason though. I really hope they listen to you and consider inducing you early, otherwise it will be a worry-filled last stretch for you.

Buddha are you at the fun part of TTC yet ?
marbles where are you in your cycle after your heriocs on holiday wink

Not much news from here other than frantic 2ww symptoms spotting ! Yesterday had a far bit of dark red blood then back to brown/old blood today. Am 9dpo and bought in some cheapie tests today. Anyone tried them ? I mean mega cheap 2 for a pound from the pound shop shock. Not sure whether to use them or just wait and get 'proper' ones - any opinions ? Temp was looking promising but took a wee dip today (not enough to be anything exciting like an implantation dip, just enough to wreck a potential tri-phasic) Not that I am completely obsessed or anything wink

Marbles on the topic of temping, why don't you give it a go ? Esp if you are unsure that you are ov'ing each month - that would put you more in control and allow you to understand more about what is going on. However, I do appreciate that not everyone is a control freak like me ! I was really religious about the rules when TTC DS in that I would not get out of bed within 3 hours of taking temp and took it at exactly the same time every morning. Now, I do not have the luxury of sticking to the rules and am often up with DS just a few mins before I take temp (or I just take it whenever I can !) and it still tells me what is going on. All I am trying to say is that you do not have to be too anal about it so it is not as restrictive as you may think.

evening ladiessmile

murray i have temped with no success in the early days of TTC and for me, therein madness lies...i am trying to stay relaxed about things as i know that it is relatively easy for me to get a BFP so i must be ovulating but im pretty sure that i get a anovulatory cycle every 3 months or so as i have NO Ov signs on anov cycles its like my body just CBA to Ov that monthhmm im on CD34 today...AF was due last weekend(at the latest tuesday) and other than some sign...BFN on tuesday morning too so just my uterus being an arsehole true to form...

how are you? the symptoms sound promisingwink keep us posted!

nemo i cant remember if you said you have had the water around the baby measured? i was told that DD was going to be HUGE and i had a meltdown in the MW much so that she sent me for a growth scan where it was revealed that DD was normal sized but i had 2 litres of excess fluid (polyhydramnios) and had to be monitored more closely...just a thought really...DD eventually ended up 8lb 12oz and when my waters went it was like niagra fallsgrin we needed to buy an new bed, bedroom carpet and i had to change my clothes 4 times throughout the day when i was in labour...might be worth a talk with the MW

CaptainNemo Fri 06-Apr-12 08:40:21

Hello ladies, happy Easter! grin grin

marbles thanks for the kind words, that must have been scary for you with DD! It was the measurements of the actual baby on the scan that were big, specifically the abdominal circumference.... So it's not extra fluid. Had a good MW appt yest so feeling a bit better, though our mortgage co are currently being ARSEHOLES so am extremely stressed about that. Why can things never be simple?!?
Ah well, DH's bday today so will try to think about it. 8 people here for dinner tonight but my mum has kindly done most of the food as his present so hopefully shouldn't be too much work

Big love to all smile hope you have a fab B H weekend xx

BuddhaBelly Fri 06-Apr-12 12:57:12

Afternoon ladies. Happy Easter (gutted can't do bunny ears on app!)
Apologies for only lurking rl has been mega busy.
Nemo Ouchy Ouchy big baby I'm not surprised your stressing out my lovely especially with your past history! I'm still wondering why you're celebrating dh's birthday considering his poor show for special days lately winkgrin
Murray Any other symptoms other than the bleeding? Although that alone sounds good smile I only had implantation bleed with one if the three pgs and that resulted in E so I've everything crossed for you.
Marbles what is your body doing to your head again? I'm the same as you can't get the temping much prefer my ov sticks from eBay wink

Yes we're at the fun part if ttc, out on a hen weekend tonight so poor dh better look out later wink grin although E is going through bad week of awful sleep so tiredness and ttc are not good partners!

gomurray Fri 06-Apr-12 21:07:15

heellooo ladies ! So good to see so many of you on here, happy Easter smile

Marbles WTF is going on with your body ? Surely time to test again ...? I have fingers crossed for BFP but I also know that it is not as simple as that for you, so big hugs xx

Buddha Go girl ! Never mind tiredness and sleepless nights, needs must ! Just be glad you know when you are going to ovulate (give or take a day or 2), even poor DP was getting fed up having to perform every other night when my egg was AWOL wink. Spring is the best time for fertility and new beginnings so crossing everything (even my legs at the moment !) for you xx

Nemo how did dinner go ? I hope you made minimal effort for maximum results. Partly because you should not be busting a gut for DH after his recent track record and also because at your stage people should be running around after you, esp when you are so stressed.

Symptoms from here are not much in terms of bleeding now, very high temp again today and a touch of constipation (nice !). I had actually forgotten that constipation is a 'sign' until I read my pregnancy book the other day to find out what 'may' be happening in there - apparently due to hormone levels. Anyway, I was going to test tomorrow but have decided to sit it out and wait for Monday - AF due then (or Tuesday) so more likely to get an accurate result by then. I don't want to get BFN tomorrow then go out and drown my sorrows only to get a BFP later ! Listen to me so hopeful... what happened to not getting my hopes up ? hmm

gomurray Sun 08-Apr-12 19:07:25

Happy Easter ladies smile hope you have all had a chocolate and fun filled day.

My day has been ruined by the early and unwelcome arrival of AF (actually started last night so at least 2 days early). I know it was our first month but am still gutted as had several "signs". Had zero pre-AF PMT, just sudden onset of cramps then AF, very strange. Am convinced body tried to get PG but messed up hormones just couldn't sustain pregnancy, am so fed up with my post-MC broken body. Facing due date is going to be so much tougher not being PG but at least I can drink wine on holiday sad.

Happy Easter [bsmile]

murray so sorry AF arrivedsad when do you go on your holiday?

AF is (still) AWOLhmm BFN yesterday (again)hmm I'm pretty sure I'm not upduffed as I have ZERO signs of anything... Who knows eh...

That should be smile...

BuddhaBelly Fri 13-Apr-12 07:09:59

Murray I'm so sorry af got you I know how much you wanted to be pg for due date but maybe your body is just not quite ready. Have a brilliant time on holiday, kick back, relax drink and be merry wink who knows what will happen next month x
Marbles What's your body doing at the moment? Af arrived?

Nothing to report here af due a week today/tomorrow. No symptoms unless you count toothpaste tasting funny hmm
Work is mega busy and there are 3 of us ttc there so we're all watching each other like hawks wink

Hi buddha grin

AF got me toohmm 10days late! Ahhh well I have started Agnus castus now to see if I can regulate my cycle...

Looking forward to seeing if things have worked for you lovelysmile

BuddhaBelly Sat 14-Apr-12 16:46:40

marbles 10days late shock what a nightmare really hope the Agnes works. Loving some of the pictures on draw something I hunk your officially my highest record! grin
obsessive symptom spotting alert - think I mentioned the toothpaste, I'm also over sensitive to smells, some make me heave, but unless I really squash my (.)(.) they aren't render which is normally my first sign so probably another month closer to being 40 and not pg angrygrin

gomurray Sat 14-Apr-12 19:08:42

Ladies, so lovely to 'see' you smile

marbles 10 days late, that is just rubbish, do you think you ovulated late ?... Good luck with the AC I really hope it works for you and gives you some hope.

Buddha heightened sense of smell sounds promising wink. What a nightmare with others at work TTC and all checking each other out to guess if each other is PG !! I look forward to hearing your news next weekend, I'll check in from hols to find out.

I am packing and looking forward to some sun grin Acupuncturist told me today to avoid shellfish and spicy food (2 of my most favourite things) and not to drink cold drinks or eat cold foods like ice-cream - I'm going on bl00dy holiday FFS !!! I am not sure whether to take heed or just ignore him altogether hmm. I told him that I refuse to take the stinky herbs on holiday so he has given me pills instead. Am so fed up with my body as my temp has not gone back to proper pre-ov temps since AF arrived. Temps not high enough for PG though - basically either on or 0.1 above coverline, very frustrating. Acupuncturist told me that hormones are unbalanced because I am not in good health which annoyed me as I eat healthily, am not overweight, exercise regularly, take loads of vits and rarely drink too much grrrr... he says my poor circulation is the problem which I don't understand as I have reynauds but had that the last 2 times I got PG so my hormones were fine then... angry. I will persevere with it for a while but am getting fed up waiting for results - I guess doing something is better than doing nothing though... Anyway, moan moan, sorry ladies. See you all after my holiday - we leave on Monday - I am hoping that once due date has passed I can move on and feel more positive.

BuddhaBelly Sun 15-Apr-12 10:20:29

Murray Hmm not too sure about all the info you've been given by acupuncturist like you said you managed to get pg before without all the herbs and food avoidance but if it feels like your doing something constructive and helps regulate your temp then it can't be a bad thing. Well jel about your holiday envy how long are you away for? Is due date when actually away too?
Don't hold your breath waiting for news next weekend I'm sure there will be nothing to report again smile

gomurray Sun 15-Apr-12 14:44:42

buddha due date is 26th and we come home on 27th. To be honest I am dreading announcement of my friend's baby more (due 1 week before I was). However, I have done a fair bit of googling about Traditional Chinese Medicine and everything I have read links in with what my acupuncturist told me. In addition the advice for people in my situation is to relax, make time for yourself and not to overanalyze and worry too much - ahem, sounds familiar !! So, I am now is a super-positive frame of mind. Dwelling and moping will get me nowhere, I need to enjoy my holiday, relax, spend QT with my boys and follow (some) of the advice I've been given re food. Hopefully by the time I come back I'll be fighting fit, super-chilled and ready to get up the duff ! From next weekend our shagathon begins - good timing being on holiday - although unless I have a timely egg this cycle I'm unlikely to ov before I get back.
Loads of luck for next weekend mrs xx

BuddhaBelly Sun 15-Apr-12 17:30:47

Murray I shall do a little egg dance for you in the style of "mama do the hump" grin I can see why the birth announcement would be harder so don't beat yourself up if it hits hard. Relax, have a fab time you deserve a good break smile

Was going to read up and check in but I needs a cuddle apparently then housework then playgroup. Will attempt to check back if in still awake at 11:30 smile hope you're all well x

I think I'm up to date now, looks like a few ((( ))) hugs are in order. murray I wish I understood more about acupuncture but have no experience, I once saw a homeopath at uni but fell out with the method when she told me I couldn't take Canistan (sp) for an uncomfortable case of you know what blush my sil is giving acupuncture a go too, suppose anything's worth a try smile

buddha I totally get the toothpaste thing! Had it with I!

marbles what's this Angus cactus? I used lots of B6 to regulate/lengthen my cycle after my infection last May, is it similar?

Nemo I am also carrying a biggun but haven't managed to squeeze anything out so ignorantly optimistic for vbac. Didn't see you at Peppa pig world! Did you have fun? smile

Hello to all, will post more when iPad is charged up, off to do my natal hypnotherapy cd now smile scan on wed, consultant on fri to discuss vbac.... Fingers crossed smile

BuddhaBelly Tue 17-Apr-12 14:18:03

Well it's happened of the three of us ttc at work we have a winner (unfortunately not me) it couldn't happen to a nicer person and although this is only her 3rd month of ttc and I've been coaching her from the start grin I'm only a massive little bit envy as she's getting married week Saturday and then her new dh us away for 7 months so it is such good timing for them. I did have a little tear and a big sigh but hugely happy and hope this is the start of a run of three! smile

CaptainNemo Wed 18-Apr-12 22:21:46

Hello animals smile

Sorry to be AWOL, was going to say just haven't had the energy to post, but how crap does that sound?!?

DD is being "challenging", plus am v tired and stressed about various things - work, money, mortgage, baby, blah blah blah... The biggest one, obviously, is the baby. And it seems that "biggest" is the operative word.... I'll try to keep it brief. Having been told by the hospital that my blood glucose levels were fine, the mw said there was sugar in my urine. Finally got a GP appt who said my levels WEREN'T fine, they were too high. Also told me that I could be looking at having a 10-11lb baby. Gulp. Was away on a hen weekend last weekend With a friend who's a gp so she suggested I borrow her blood glucose monitor and do some random finger prick tests and a couple of fasting ones just to see. So I did. And they were ALL abnormally high.... Finally spoke to consultant about it yesterday. He said sugar in urine doesn't matter as hospital test is definitive, said gp is wrong that levels are too high, and that if all levels were high using my friend's machine then the machine prob isn't working properly! But don't feel all tht reassured tbh.... Have a scan tomorrow aft and then the consultant knows I want to book a clinic appt with him to discuss the birth.
Having been v ante an elcs now I'm not so sure.... I think I was, and am, more traumatised by T's birth than I realised. I am quite simply terrified by the prospect of delivering an even bigger baby with no pain relief and tearing again. Am also pretty worried about the effect such a big baby would have on my pelvic floor and level of continence, and am well aware I could end up needing surgery in that regard in years to come if this LO does more damage... So actually an elcs, preferably at 38 weeks, doesn't sound so bad, but I have no idea what the consultant will say about it.... Aaargghhhh!!

Was intending to catch up with everyone now, but think I need to go to bed. Sorry. I'll try to come back tomorrow, when hopefully I'll post something less self centred. Scan is at 4pm tomorrow... Wish me luck!!

BuddhaBelly Thu 19-Apr-12 08:00:43

Nemo goodness me your getting the run around about this baby. No- one can surely raise any eyebrows about an elcs?? hmm at the end of the day you're the one who's got to deliver! Good luck today x

Af arrived Wednesday sad

CaptainNemo Thu 19-Apr-12 11:48:14

Decided to take a 5 minute break from work umm... about an hour ago... and have been googling photos of c section scars. Dear lord.....!! Did you guys who had sections have stitching, gluing or stapling afterwards?

Buddha angry and sad at af for you. I don't know why, but I am just positive this is going to work out for you, you WILL have a second baby, I can feel it in my waters! Sorry that's not much help.

You too Murray Try not to get too hung up on what your acupuncturist has said (easy for me to say, I know) He sounds very similar to the first 2 people I saw. The second kept going on about how I needed to wait (and wait and wait and wait...) before ttc because I needed to "heal my uterus" and how my body wasn't ready and blah blah blah. To be honest it made me feel awful, like my body was failing somehow. And in the end it was like the sun coming out (god that sounds cheesy) when it suddenly struck me one day, that my uterus didn't need to 'heal' - all that it had gone through was to deliver a baby at 17 weeks, I hadn't injured myself! Saying to myself "do you know what, I'm fine" was somehow extremely empowering. She also had A LOT to say about what I ate and how/when I exercised, in fact pretty much all areas of my life. The best thing she ever did was to go away on an extended holiday and recommend I start seeing her friend while she was away. I'm still seeing the friend over 3 years later and I haven't looked back! Maybe you'd do better with someone with a more positive approach? Seeing someone who appeared to have more faith in me and my ability to have a baby somehow made me have more faith in myself, and that may be just what you need right now - I'm no expert but I suspect it would do you far more god than avoiding ice cream and shellfish! Ok, rant over wink