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Parenting

Using cutlery the wrong way round...

55 replies

Gravitygirl · 29/03/2010 18:11

H and I had a huge row at the weekend over our dc eating with the cutlery.
H eats with his fork in the left hand and knife in the right, I hate it and now the kids have started copying.He says he has eaten like that for most of his life, despite dinners being withold and being banished to his room for not eating correctly, he is adament he could not use the knife and fork the other way round.
I dont want my children eating like that, he called me a snob, Im not , I just dont want them to get picked on for eating the wrong way round.
Does anyone think it is a physical impossibility or something that needs perserverance or should I just let them eat how they like incase they cant eat the correct way, is there a correct way? or is it ettiquette?

Help!

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Gravitygirl · 29/03/2010 18:11

Sory that should be fork in right hand and knife in left... doh!

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TheArmadillo · 29/03/2010 18:16

I think your dh is an adult and should be able to choose how he eats ffs.

Why do you care so much if the kids copy? Most people wouldn't notice.

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BoysAreLikeDogs · 29/03/2010 18:18

good lord

I am hereby applying a big fat 4

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Gravitygirl · 29/03/2010 18:19

My h is entitled to eat how he wants, I never once said he could'nt, I just was pondering on what the general consensus is on which way to hold your knife and fork and if I do need to worry about teaching my children a 'correct' way.

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BigTillyMint · 29/03/2010 18:23

DS does that, and is right-handed.

DD is left-handed, but eats like a right-hander!

DH generally only uses a fork, in his right hand.

I am the only one with any manners in my house, but my mother is Hyacinth Bouquet

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ToffeeAddict · 29/03/2010 18:24

Haha I do this, I'm always teasing my mum for not bringing me up properly but she is adamant that as a child I point blank refused to use the cutlery any other way desite her best endeavours.

I don't know why I use them the wrong way round but I do know that when I make the effort to use them properly it all just feels extremely clumsy for some reason and I feel that I am drawing more attention to myself than just using my knife and fork in a way that I am comfortable with.

FWIW I'm 28 now, and very rarely does anyone notice, and when they do it's hardly a big deal, just something that I laugh about.

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Gravitygirl · 29/03/2010 18:27

Interesting, thankyou for your insight, fwiw Im left handed but have always eaten the so called 'correct' way. I am intersted to know wether it is a brain thing though, only allowing the combination one way....
I am slightly anxious people wll think its bad manners but hey ho what can you do, Im certainly not going down the road dh mum did, thats just cruelty!

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Choccyfan · 29/03/2010 19:21

I am left handed and also eat the 'wrong' way. I never really thought about it until I had a waitressing job and would lay out the cutlery the 'wrong' way, which of course led to some confusion for the customers....

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bloss · 29/03/2010 19:57

Message withdrawn

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feedthegoat · 29/03/2010 20:00

I do this and can honestly say no one else has ever mentioned it. I have can't say I have faced a lifetime of being picked on for it!

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Bumperlicious · 29/03/2010 20:08

I do this and I too can honestly say I don't think anyone has ever noticed let alone picked on me. Who really do you think is going to pick on your children over this? Do people really care about this?

And who made up the frigging rule about how you should eat anyway? Ridiculous. Eat whichever way is comfortable.

Really, what do you think will happen to your children if they eat the other (I will not say wrong) way?

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mamasunshine · 29/03/2010 20:57

My sister and I both do this and it has never been a problem for us or anyone eating with us! I think you should just let them get on with it!

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emsyj · 29/03/2010 21:03

I don't understand what your problem is if they eat with cutlery in opposite hands, but in answer to your question.... I ate this way around as a child and no longer do. I can't remember when I changed, but it wasn't as a result of being trained/forced to change, it was just a natural thing.

I still can't tie shoelaces in the 'correct' way though, I would bring shame on your household if I was your child!

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Clowance · 29/03/2010 21:25

Oh dear, I fear I come across as having no manners or as being very odd.

I often eat with my fork in my right hand, but if i need to cut something i swap them over so the knife is in my right hand. Then often swap back to use the fork to pick up the piece i've cut. Don't know why

My mum did teach me manners, honest

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usualsuspect · 29/03/2010 21:27

Do people really worry about stuff like this ......

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Bumperlicious · 29/03/2010 22:05

Clowance, isn't that very common (as in ubiquitous - not 'common') in the States?

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ToccataAndFudge · 29/03/2010 22:09

I am left handed and can only use a fork and spoon in my left hand, I can however use a knife in either (if it's choping vegetables I use my left, cutting up my dinner use right - otherwise I'll chuck food everywhere trying to use my other hand for the fork )

My Great Great Aunt used to work in one of the big Bristol Hotels (the one over looking the Suspension bridge) they were very very well to do. Even SHE (and her DD - my Great Aunt( had no issues with me eating that way - they said it was better to hold my knife and fork that way round than to make a mess when eating.

Of course I come unstuck when it comes to eating something with spoon and desert fork.........

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seeker · 29/03/2010 22:15

Why on earth does it matter which hand they hold their knives and forks in? So long as they eat tidily and DON"T HOLD THE KNIFE LIKE A PEN it really doesn't matter. I was brought up with very very old fashioned proper manners and I hold my knife in my left hand.

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TabithaTwitchet · 29/03/2010 22:24

I used to use my cutlery the wrong way round, despite all parental attempts to make me eat correctly. When I was 18, I started worrying people would notice and laugh, so I switched to the right way. I had a couple of weeks of scattering peas everywhere and making hard to cut food jump off my plate while I got used to cutting with my other hand. But now you couldn't tell at all

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fuzzypicklehead · 29/03/2010 22:25

There's a right and wrong hand for your knife & fork? Seriously, I never knew that. I was taught to chew with my mouth closed and pass to the left, but nobody ever mentioned which hand went with which utensil.

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Bumperlicious · 29/03/2010 22:26

'Of course I come unstuck when it comes to eating something with spoon and desert fork.........'

Surely you'd just use one at a time. I can't imagine eating pudding with two pieces of cutlery at the same time, like a main meal . Not about rules, just would feel weird to me.

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Meglet · 29/03/2010 22:32

I'm right-handed but hold my cutlery the 'wrong' way round.

The world won't come to an end because of it.

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Debs75 · 29/03/2010 22:34

I am right handed and often used to pick up my knife and fork and swop them around before eating. I can however eat with both hands so sometimes I do, I think it depends on where I am and what I am eating. I always eat soup and cereal with my right hand. I can't use fork and spoon with pudding it just seems weird.

What does make me wonder is why do some people have their fork upside down? With the prongs curving over not under. Someone told me that it is 'posher' but my mum's old bosses, relatives of the Queen, ate with their forks curving under.

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oopslateagain · 29/03/2010 22:36

I hold my cutlery 'wrong'. I'm ambidextrous so in theory I should be able to use either hand, but I can't.

When I'm preparing food, I can use a knife in either hand. But when eating, the knife-in-right, fork-in-left just feels so wrong. I end up making 'sawing' motions with the fork, trying to cut my food!

I'm not fussed about the 'proper' way of eating, surely that's being a bit Victorian!

I only come unstuck in restaurants where they give you a fish knife. I have to ask for a normal one. I always switch my cutlery around as soon as I sit down at a table.

I was in a REALLY posh restaurant once, and the waiter came up and tut-tutted and apologised to me and started switching the cutlery back to the 'right' side; I said it was fine, I was left-handed (it's easier that way!) and he put everything right back. I did order fish, and they actually brought me a left-handed fish knife! I was well impressed

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ooosabeauta · 29/03/2010 22:47

I eat this (wrong) way round, and it has only been picked up on a few times. I mix in polite enough company, but no one's been offended by it (that I know of!) and I've actually been told it looks quite graceful because the knife is used more gently and with less sawing if it's not in your stronger hand. I'm not arguing the case that it's 'right', but I can't regret eating that way and it hasn't held me back .

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