five preschool toys I loathe most of all

(142 Posts)
zapostrophe Mon 22-Mar-10 18:08:49

1. playdoh. The little fragments that end up ground into curtains and carpet. The suspiciously softly textured orange pot that has been adulterated with 2yo's saliva.

2. megabloks. So much space taken up, so little play.

3. v-tech (and similar) "learning toys" such as the Thomas one which barks "would you like to play a game" at us until we throw it at the wall. And no, my 4yo can't spell CEE-AY-KAY-EE cake

Fayrazzled Mon 22-Mar-10 18:11:44

Totally agree with you on anything V-Tech- we have the shape sorter rocket and it drives me nuts. Also mega-bloks- my children mainly spread them all over the floor and have never once made anything creative with them. Add to that Lego as they get a bit older and Playmobil with its cursed small parts and you have Toy Room 101.

IMoveTheStars Mon 22-Mar-10 18:12:18

agree with megablocks.

Anything huge and plastic and on wheels

Anything that doesn't have an off-switch.

(that'll be most of the crao DS owns then!)

Pumphreydidit Mon 22-Mar-10 18:13:55

Those plastic balls that come in a pack of 100 but multiply to a million when you are not looking.

IMoveTheStars Mon 22-Mar-10 18:15:37

Anything pop-up

The V-Tech walker... been in a cupboard for 18 months now but the songs are as fresh in my mind as ever.

tartyhighheels Mon 22-Mar-10 18:19:41

anything with batteries that makes sound... bah humbug

particularly a crab we had that counted in a cockney accent - just bloody dreadful and stayed on top of the wardrobe until forgotten about then off to the charity shop. In fact, my children didn't even know you could change batteries until about a year and a half ago... smart mummy huh??

JackBauer Mon 22-Mar-10 18:20:40

Jigsaws with 2 pieces that get eaten/lost.

Agree with anything with no off switch or automatic cut off or volume, so at 9pm the toybox suddenly shouts 'Boo, I SEE YOU!' and scares the living shit out of you.

katechristie Mon 22-Mar-10 18:22:40

[sigh] anything my mother buys (must need batteries, be the noisiest toy in the shop and preferably have flashing lights)

v-tech are the main culprits in above said group...the pink radio, the pop-up ball, the talking book (aaaggghhhhhhhhhh) [disclaimer - am sure they are wonderfully educational toys, scuttles off to avoid legal battle with v-tech)

IMoveTheStars Mon 22-Mar-10 18:24:22

"crab we had that counted in a cockney accent"

farking hell, I just broke a rip laughing...

IMoveTheStars Mon 22-Mar-10 18:25:25

ditto @ JackBauer

Christ, i can't see i'm laughing so much!

I would love to contribute to this but I fear for my job! grin

Erm... Anything that we dont sell is absolutely awful. <nods earnestly>

Anything that's small enough to roll under the sofa. I'm forever finding cars, wooden blocks and small people every time I hoover!

Jackbauer DD has a sing and learn puppy that says "peekaboo, I see you!" It scares the crap out of me if we've forgotten to turn it off and I accidentally knock it.

I actually want the crab that counts in a cockney accent... sounds good!

bunnylicious Mon 22-Mar-10 18:32:01

I Second the vtech nursery rhyme book, "it's nuuuursery rhyme time!"

Hideous.

Chuffing hate the sand and water table too.

Bounce and Spin Zebra. It's so noisy and takes up too much room!

tartyhighheels Mon 22-Mar-10 18:38:51

i think the crab might have been a v tech actually.....

nothing agaimst cockneys you understand, just electronic orange ones.....

oh and we have a monkey that says 'i love you gibraltar.....' it belongs to h and has some ridiculous sentimental reason for staying but it suddenly pipes up from the toy pile, in a worn out battery way and creeps the shit out of me... i have trodden on said monkey a few times but it will not just give up the ghost

BariatricObama Mon 22-Mar-10 18:39:47

"hello puppy calling would you liek to play with me, lets have fun together while we learn our abc" dd is 6 and that song is still firmly embedded in my consciousness. i will sing it on my death bed.

And just when you think it's all quiet:

"Bye bye"

LieutenantPigeon Mon 22-Mar-10 18:42:45

<annoying american accent> "come aboard the animal train come on everyone! Learning about animals is really lots of fun!"

Animal train
By Fisher Price

MaMight Mon 22-Mar-10 18:45:15

See, now our best toy ever was the V-tech shape rocket. It's been played with and played with first by dd and now ds too. It's one of those toys that they discover more to do with as they get older.

And we love Megabloks too. Ds plays with his most days.

We have a stupid elephant that plays circus tunes - it's one of those Fisher Price things that takes the stupid blocks that have different things in them. It's loud and annoying and hideous. angry

And PLaymobil - all those teeny tiny little pieces to lose! A treasure chest with tiny pieces of eight in it for a 4yo FGS.

angry

boogeek Mon 22-Mar-10 18:49:04

That's three, not five. Perhaps "counting toys" are on the list too grin?
We like playmobil and lego in this house: it fits up the hoover <evil mum>. Most hated is the ELC pink plastic keyboard that plays sodding Jingle Bells. Over and over and over and over and *the batteries never run out*!

SparklyJules Mon 22-Mar-10 18:53:09

Fecking Polly Pocket.

It goes everywhere.

Case in point: New PP toy bought this very afternoon - Polly and assorted androgynous looking animals (is it a rabbit? or a cat?). After 5 mins of playing with it on the living room rug, 3 parts of it were missing. Where the feck to? I've scoured the floor and can only presume the 2 yr old has eaten them, mistaking them for brightly coloured candy.

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