This is an extract from a post on another baby website (hope it is OK to post here). The people replying generally said that the mother had been too harsh on the child, that the child was only five and shouldn't have known any better - see a reply posted below. Would this have been your response? I feel maybe I am too harsh in my parenting because I would have been really cross if a 5yr old of mine had destroyed a wall enough to need repainting.
Just put dd1 (5) to bed and discovered she has peeled a huge patch of paint off her bedroom wall by her bed
I'm really shocked, this is by far the naughtiest thing she has ever done.
So far I have not got cross at all but sat her down on her own and asked why she thinks she did it and how was she feeling when she did it. Both questions have resulted in a shrugged shoulders and 'not sure' replies. When prompted she said she was feeling a bit sad and both me and dh have said to her tonight if she feels like that again or feels worried or sad about anything she can come to us anytime and say she needs to talk and we will make time to talk.
I'm not sure we can leave it at that though (the discipline side not the wall!), its going to be a real pain to put right, their room was only painted a year ago and I am pretty sure we don't have any of the paint left.
I don't want to give her the message that its fine to do things like this to get attention.
To me it seems to shout of an attention seeking thing which is worrying and I am panicking again about middle child syndrome! but I also think maybe she really didn't mean to do it but the peeling paint thing got a bit addictive when she did a tiny bit (I know I would have found it really satisfying to peel off that much paint! )
so wwyd?
i think she has no idea why she did it and it is very likely she felt sad when you were questioning not at all when she did it.it isn't naughty its curiosity. have you ever said to her several time do not peel paint off the wall. of course not so why shouldnt she??? why on earth woud she consider it naughty? its just paint its just a all and i imagine its her wall. the sad thing is a total red herring. you have given her loads of attention now so shes learnt that peeling paint gets that. i doubt she was looking for it just peeling paint!
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Am I mean?
6 replies
BottySpottom · 11/08/2009 22:59
OP posts:
CyradisTheSeer ·
11/08/2009 23:17
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