Mumsnet Discussions - We're being offered lots of help - but I don't know whether to accept it..

Talk : Parenting

Start new thread within this topic | Watch this thread | Flip this thread |

This is page 1 of 2 (This thread has 15 messages.) First | Previous | Next | Last Go to page

We're being offered lots of help - but I don't know whether to accept it..

(15 Posts)

By Fri 03-Jul-09 19:14:37 Add message | Report | Contact poster

We've got 4 week old twins as well as a 5 year old and 3 year old. I had a really rocky pregnancy and lots of our neighbours have helped out with school runs etc whilst I've been in and out of hospital.

Now that the twins are here our friends and neighbours are still offering us loads of help including taking our bigger children to parties at the weekend as well as playdates, that I will never be able to return.

It's fantastic to be part of a close knit community, but I don't know whether I should accept the help we're being offered. It makes me feel really uncomfortable to accept help when I can't return the favour.

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Fri 03-Jul-09 20:16:18

You must have already been a good neighbour and friend otherwise your pals wouldn't have offered. In some ways are these people returning favours they already owe you.

Take the help, I love being able to help out my pals and I never expect anything in return.

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Fri 03-Jul-09 19:44:36

I love the idea of a thank you BBQ. I would accept all the help you can and be very appreciative to those who offer (know you are being I'm sure smile

)

You sound like you live in a lovely community and there aren't many of those left...

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Fri 03-Jul-09 19:40:51

In many ways I would love to accept all the offers of help but it just makes me feel so guilty. But you all seem to be saying that it's fine - so perhaps I should try to accept it graciously...

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Fri 03-Jul-09 19:36:49

they sound lovely!can you bottle them? grin

it does feel odd to except help doesnt it!but its lovely,make the most of it as i think you might offend them if you stop it.

i like bbq idea,or getting the dc to make cards.

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Fri 03-Jul-09 19:34:30

TAKE IT!!!
1. People like to help
2. You may not return favours directly, but you either will or already have helped out others, I used to think of it as a kind of child care karma.
3. It takes a village to raise a child, even more so with twins, I really believe this and sounds as if you have a village there, be thankful.
My DTs now teenagers, life does get easier, but I would never have coped without my friends.

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Fri 03-Jul-09 19:33:37

I think the BBQ idea sounds like a great way to show appreciation later - or thank you cards now even?

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Fri 03-Jul-09 19:31:49

Your neighbours sound lovely, I agree with Expat, smile say thank you and throw a party later on when you are feeling up to it.

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Fri 03-Jul-09 19:30:19

People do love to get their mits on little children, and they feel the sense of community too. Who knows that you won't be able to repay it - in years to come you'll have lots of errand-runners, car-washers and so on! It sounds really nice smile

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Fri 03-Jul-09 19:29:20

Sometimes it's easier to give help than take it - remember how much more fun it is sometimes to be the gift-giver than the gift-getter than get one?

And if you're part of close-knit community, you'll be that for a long time - you've years to find chances to return the favours, if you feel you should.

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Fri 03-Jul-09 19:29:14

How can I show my appreciation Disturbingly?

This is page 1 of 2 (This thread has 15 messages.) First | Previous | Next | Last Go to page

Add your message here

Message

Nickname:
Password:

To post a message you need a valid mumsnet nickname and password. If you have forgotten your nickname, click here for a reminder. If you are not yet a member of mumsnet, you can join here.

Emphasis: To bold a word, surround it with asterisks, so *hello* will display hello. For underline use _ , so _hello_ gives hello. For italics use ^, so ^hello^ gives hello. To strike out a word, surround it with two hyphens either side, so --dog-- gives dog

Links and smileys: To insert a smiley face,

, type [smile] or :)
For a big grin,

, type [grin] or :o
For a wink,

, type [wink]
For a shocked face,

, type [shock]
For an angry face,

, type [angry]
For an embarrassed face,

, type [blush]
For a sad face,

, type [sad] or :(
For an envious face,

, type [envy]
For a sceptical face,

, type [hmm]
For a no comment face,

, type [biscuit]

Links The simplest way to insert a link is to enter the link itself, surrounded by [[ and ]]. So if you type [[www.mumsnet.com]], the link will display as http://www.mumsnet.com. If you want your link to display text other than the web address itself, leave a space after the address then add the text before the ]]. So "Look at [[www.mumsnet.com this page]]", would display "Look at this page".

Mumsnet Talk

Mumsnet latest

Useful tools

Recipe of the week

MN Local

Follow mumsnet on...

Mumsnet Talk

We're being offered lots of help - but I don't know whether to accept it..