I'm a terrible mother..
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(101 Posts)
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Ds1 just turned 3 last week and ds2 will be 13 weeks this week. Some days (like saturday) I can be quite confident with both of them. Other days, like today, I just want to cry and I feel like everything is just wrong and I can't enjoy ds2 (or ds1!). I shouldn't complain cos ds1 is in daycare and ds2 has settled himself into a routine that fits in quite well around ds1 for the moment until he starts pre-school (far from home) in september.
So why do I feel like this?? It's really not fair on the boys to have a mummy that feels so low. I really wish I could enjoy being a mother of 2 like I did a mother of 1. I just feel like my head is all over the place and my confidence keeps dropping. I thought I would be more settled within myslef by now..
yes, is worth it. Just make sure its someone good...I saw a homeopath before when we were ttc and she was ok, but didn't do wonders. But the lady I see now is kind of exceptional I think. She also gives me a sleep remedy that is really good, I drop off instantly. I was taking about 5 Calms pills to get to sleep and even then I was worrying about everything. Also I've been seeing a counsellor, so the two together really helped me work through a lot of things. I think you just have phases in your life where everything gets on top of you and you need a bit of help. I would much rather think about it all, even feel sad if I need to, than take drugs...the gp did give me beta blockers, but I didnt' take them. Just used the homeopathic anti anxiety remedy and that was fine.
That's really interesting. I'll have to look into it. Thank you x
Yes it works really well for me. I think you have to make sure you find someone really good...the lady I see was recommended. Really helped with anxiety and sorting our my hormones, balancing me basically. I know it works, don't care what critics say, because if you take arnica for bruising or for an operation, it clearly works...
That's very interesting - How did the homeopathy work??
You don't have to take anti depressants, just realise you are feeling down, and try to get a break. I went to talk to my gp and said no way would I take ADs...I ended up being referred to a counsellor for 6 sessions which really helped. Also went to a homeopath which helped balance my hormones. There are things you can do...also everyone feels like that some days, so you're not at all alone. Obviously from all the posts!
Thank you so much backtoblue. I have re-read this thread, though not for a while. I am definately doing better than before, but still get some days where I'm finding it hard. It can all feel a bit isolating at time - do you know what I mean?
Dh is great - very supportive. HV calls every now and then and GP is also supportive and seeing me regularly. She says I don't need AD's which is great.
Yes ds2 will be 4 months tomorrow. How about yours? How is ds1 doing around him now? Bet he loves him to pieces! I am trying really ahrd to enjoy it for what it is - just like you - but it's just hard sometimes. I had been doing so well but have been a little low since yesterday. I'm still keeping busy and trying to get out and about..
Have you re-read this thread at all to go over the good advice & the support? And to see how you have had your good & bad times- things do change!
Don't just struggle on though shish; how are things with your dh & does the HV still visit (or do you see her/him) and same with GP?
How is ds2 doing? Must be about 4 months old is he now? Remember that this time DOES pass & it'll seem like it whizzed by. I don't want to look back & regret not enjoying it or at least appreciating it for what it is. I don't plan to have another one ...do you?!
What about weaning? I'm not going to rush into that or think about it yet! You've done it once...you'll do it again!!
I'm having a hrad couple of day and finding that sit down to type on here and I'm just panicking - sorry. I didn't mean to be so brief.
I'm trying to convince myself that I will see the benefits of 2 dc's but finding it hard at the moment. Now also starting to get stressed about weaning ds2 as there is so much conflicting advice from different HV's and can't remember exactly how I did it with ds1. I think I just keep on finding things to stress about..
Shish - talk more on here..it's helpful & it'll be good just to write things down anyway.
I really don't know why. I think I still feel a little daunted by the everything..