How often do you shout?

[Fleurlechaunte]

I have just read ds the riot act after catching him putting back a box I had removed that enables his two year old sister to climb up onto the dressing table - he is nearly 6 and had a full explanation as to why the box was being moved. He put it back so that she would climb up again. It is high and he understands the danger, he was laughing when he put it back.

I yelled and he had time out for 5 minutes. However when I yelled his sister ran out of the room and I think she was scared. I feel completely crap now. I don't think I shout that often and it is reserved for pre meditated naughtiness ie todays incident.

Feel really guilty now.

[preggydonuts]

Sometimes I RAGE at my children. I swear they think I am unhinged. I don't think a bit of healthy ranting is bad when you are upset.
I don't go in for all this softly softly stuff.

[Fleurlechaunte]

I think I am a bit Jekyll and Hyde actually. 95% of the time I am extremely positive and patient but just every now and then something will really push my buttons, usually if I get a whiff of any kind of meaness towards siblings etc and I go off on one .

[FiveGoMadInDorset]

Lots,

[Joolyjoolyjoo]

Too much ! But I am trying, as my 3 1/2 yr old has started just shouting back, so i realise I need to keep a lid on it more. But sometimes it is just so damn hard!

[kaz33]

Today but probably not for a month or so before then. DS2 put his hands over his ears, DS1 went all upset and then called me the worse mum in the world

[BlueSapphire77]

Verrrrry rarely.
But when i do (a lot since being pg) its such a shock to my DS (11) that he cries and i feel like shit and end up apologising profusely.

I don't like being shouted at myself so it has to be the crime of the century for me to even raise my voice now lol.

He knows the things which push my buttons as i explain them to him before or after rant so i suppose i am just lucky he pays attention

[Takver]

Not that often, but I shout a lot when dd does something that scares me - eg last week going off with a visiting friend much further than she is allowed to roam with out telling me first (we live on a farm, so have strict rules as to where she can go without specific permission because I worry about her/friends safety).
I think when I shout dd realises that she has really, really got it wrong . . . .

[Earlybird]

Rarely here too. Dd and I are both a bit shocked when it happens, and I do feel badly after. But is is usually a sign that things have gone waaaaayyyyyy too far.

[Coldtits]

I shout quite often. Ds has NEVER cared. he's not inured to it, I have not calloused him, he has never ever cared. His eyebrows go up, he looks at me like I'm a dement, and carries on whatever he was doing. He needs Solid Consequences. Shouting is just to get his attention to get him back to me to deliver the consequences.

[saraya]

I never thought I would live to find myself shouting and screaming at my own kids but it happens. My 3 year old ds will do something so infuriating that if i don't shout I would disintegrate! It is more for me that i do than as part of bringing my kids up. I am fed up of theories and just want to unhinge and be me when i am exasperated and fed up and plain angry but then common sense will overrule the animalistic cry and I feel gyulty, bad and a complete failure..my husband does not shout and hates me for doing so but he isn't around the kids 24/7 and he get sosme form of sleep when I don't at all. sigh..

[PatienceRequired]

All the time, it feels like. I have three little ones to control organise. DD 6, DS 3.5 and DD one next week. And i do really shout all the time.

I try to shout a bit less as my partner does and they respond much better to him, but sometimes i have to shout to be heard over all the other noise, or to ensure they realise how much i mean something, but it is mostly out of sheer frustration, and being fed up of having to repeat myself ad infinitum, and just the awful groundhog day feeling i often get, being torn in so many directions 24/7 without anyone ever being satisified with what i have done for them that day and no-one taking into account what i may need or like.
But then in my sane moments i realise that they are only children and cant be expected to consider these things.

I have recently decided that i am not the earth mother that i imagined i would be and that i need a job just to get out of the house. So after hunting, i have just been offered a job I have also recently started swimming simply just to do something for me. My partner is brilliant at taking over to make this feasible so i am lucky in that sense.

I have no answers other than to try to rise above it, which is not easy when the red mist descends, but when possible getting down and looking them in the eye and making your point is sooo much more effective i have found, just not always possible.
I am also trying to balance the deranged hectic mummy with one who plays occasionally, and snuggles on couch, stories. Makes me feel abit better anyway.

At the end of the day you can only do the best you can at the time, and children will grow up despite what we do not because of what we do.

[PatienceRequired]

Ps it both tickles me and worries me that some children get scared when parents shout. Mine are obviously far too used to it. Must try harder to shout a lot less.