What are your thoughts about using the word 'naughty' to describe your children's behaviour?

[MrsThierryHenry]

When your children misbehave, how do you explain that their behaviour is unacceptable to you? Are you completely anti-"naughty"? Do you use the word regularly? Or do you fall somewhere between the two camps?

[forevercleaning]

use it all the time, not a problem

[Redazzy]

The standard advice would be not to describe the child as naughty but focus on the behaviour, so "Throwing things is naughty" not "You are naughty". I have done both in my time but try to remember to criticise their behaviour not the child as a whole.

[Saggarmakersbottomknocker]

I think it's fine to use; to describe the behaviour not the child.

[justneedsomesleep]

fine to use. Do so ALL the time here. And sometimes don't differentiate between the child and the behaviour

[PortAndLemon]

I'd be happy to say "that was a naughty thing to do" but not "you are a naughty boy". By and large I'd try to use a different phrase that made it clear why the behaviour was unacceptable, though. "Naughty" can be a bit too general (but then sometimes that's what you want... ).

[belgo]

I use the word naughty, so do my children'snusery school, to describe behaviour. Why wouldn't you use it?

[Bungalowebelle]

I say 'That's naughty' but never 'You are naughty'.

[MintChocAddict]

I use it all the time MrsTH, to describe behavour that I'm not happy with. In fact I have used it a good few time today.

[forevercleaning]

my dc are slightly older now, but when they were toddlers, it was all the rage that we must not use the word BAD.

Now we have mved on to naughty, I dont think any of it makes much difference in the long run. They will not be seeking therapy for being called naughty when they are older surely.

Crikey most of the adult population would be suffering, as I dont know many parents who didnt use the word naughty when we were younger.

I think the world has gone mad

[mazzystartled]

I'd never say "naughty boy" or "naughty girl" but would say "hitting your sister with your playmobil crane is naughty", though I try to be more accurate in my desriptions and say why - it's unkind, it hurts, it makes her sad.

[MrsThierryHenry]

Yes, we judiciously describe behaviour as either 'naughty' or 'cheeky' depending on the severity (tearing books = cheeky. Turning on gas knobs = naughty).

I've heard two childcare professionals saying 'children's behaviour is never 'naughty'; it's cheeky'. Frankly I think that is was a load of bollocks - sometimes children just are naughty! They know what the boundaries are and they deliberately push them - so why use a euphemism to say exactly the same thing as...well, "naughty"?!

[belgo]

I don't really use the word 'bad' to my children. I much prefer 'naughty'.

[MrsThierryHenry]

MintChoc - I do hear you through the wall, but I just assume you and your DP are having a good romp!

[belgo]

I would describe turning on gas knobs as being dangerous.

[mosschops30]

dear god whatever next?????

[hecate]

Yes, if the behaviour is naughty, I say it is naughty. "That was a naughty thing to do because" "doing X is naughty because..." I think it is very important to stress the difference between BEHAVIOUR you are unhappy with and how you feel about the child.

But, tbh, mostly I just go "Oh for the love of god will you just pack it in, you pair of sods, you are driving me bonkers..."

[MintChocAddict]

Well said FC

[AbbeyA]

I don't like euphemisms either.
I am not too keen on 'sad choices'.
I would say the behaviour was naughty but not that the DC was naughty.

[MrsThierryHenry]

belgo - DS is not quite two! He has a good vocab, but not that good! He gets the point about it being naughty (as it's followed by time out punishment) so he doesn't do it any more.

[theyoungvisiter]

I think it's fine - and tbh alternative words just start to smack of euphemism.

For eg at my friend's nursery they don't use the word naughty, they say "sad" - as in "now Emily don't throw books at Sasha's head - that was a sad thing to do, wasn't it?" But to the children it just means the same thing in the end.

Although I do try to distinguish between "naughty" behaviour, ie DS being deliberately provocative, and behaviour that I just don't agree with - if DS isn't deliberately doing something he knows is wrong I try to say "dangerous" or some other word.

[MrsThierryHenry]

"sad choices"???!!! Please don't tell me you know someone who says that!

[theyoungvisiter]

cross posted with Abby A! Yes, sad choices are quite in vogue round here (N London) - where are you Abby?

[Saturn74]

Having two children under the age of two didn't give me much time to stop and consider my responses in great depth.
I called them naughty sometimes.
Other times I referred to their behaviour as naughty.

[forevercleaning]

i often say naughty because i dont see it as a nasty word. Naughty in my eyes is mischievious, used when they are doing something they know they shouldnt.

As MrsTH saysusing a euphenism for exactly the same meaning is ridiculous.

And what is so horrific aabout saying you naughty boy?

[MintChocAddict]

.
Definitely not the latter MrsTH. Too busy shouting at DS and therefore scarring him for life for any of that malarky