Parents of 4 or more come and talk to me!!!

[Nemoandthefishes]

We are toying with the idea of no.4 but want an idea of pros and cons.
We only have a 3 bed semi but would cope. We have a zafira so, do have the room in the car....also would you leave a bigger gap or the sooner the better???? DS is 4.4,dd1 2.2 and dd2 nearly 14mths

[ladytophamhatt]

What do you want to know???

[CarGirl]

I have 4, 5.5 year gap between 1 & 2, then the youngest 4 were all in 3 years & 6 weeks! It's been fine having so many young ones because it's getting it all over with and they all go to bed early! I've found it hard from when dc4 was 20 months ish and wouldn't sit happily in a pushchair anymore.

In an ideal world I'd recommend 2 close together, then a gap then the next 2 close together. I'd suggest just getting on with it TBH.

[Nemoandthefishes]

pmsl LTH just the day to days ..would you wait until one or two of the others are at school or just go for it while in baby mode.

Cargirl think all mine are sort of close in age at the min and I wonder if leaving a bigger gap means no.4 would be left out a bit.

[CarGirl]

yes I think the bigger gap would make no.4 left out. When they get to school it gets harder for a while (I have them in yr6,1 & R!) so easier to have ony one at school IMO - less homework to do, fewer letters to deal with etc

[cazboldy]

I agree with cargirl
I wanted to do the 2 and 2 later thingy.......but I have 5

ds1 11, dd1 8, ds3 6, ds3 2 and dd2 10 months

[foxythesnowman]

Ohh Nemo - I second, just get on with it

I have 4 6 and under, 3 beds and its fab.

DS1 is 6, 14 month gap between him and DS2, 22 month gap, dd1 then 2.5 years and little dd2 is 7 months old. It is hard work, but that's all it is. It's not rocket science, just constant hard work.

My theory has been that the smaller the gap, the closer they will be. And it is kind of true. The older 3 run as a pack, and although there is 3 years between DC1 and DC3, they all keep up.

I do sometimes feel as though I spend my life 'refereeing' their arguement. I get a lot of comfort from knowing they are not far apart in their schooling, so get to spend playtimes together and are good friends. If I look to the future I think they will always have each other, and look out for one another.

Because they are at school, I have time on my own with DC3, she is at nursery two mornings a week, so I have time with DC4.

It all works really well. I'd have another one

[ladytophamhatt]

if you wait and have another when ds and dd1 aer at school you'll end up having another one to keep dc4 company.

YOU know ds4 is teh best mistake we've ever made. He's just a delight and that alone should convince you to go for it

[PaulaYatesBiggestFan]

i have 15 - 13-11 5-2 and half cooked

if you do a big gap you need 2 together imo

three years is too big between last two so went for shorter this time but m/c and so twill be 2 years 5 months

it is HARD - relentless and it is ALL we do

but i love my life and am thankful to my maker whoever s/he may be for gifting me with my bairns

and i scream, a lot

[Nemoandthefishes]

lol will have to get dh to read the thread..I always wanted 4 or 5..he wanted 1 at a push 2..we have 3 and I keep saying I dont think I am done..he says he is not sure but is not closed to the idea of another.

[evenhope]

When DC4 was born the others were 5.5, 4 and 2. Life was very frantic in the early days. The other thing we didn't even consider was that with 2 school years between each child we had one doing A levels and one doing GCSEs at the same time 3 times over, which was hell on earth. Also Y9 SATS with GCSE and A levels twice.

(we then had a 15.5 year gap before DD2, which is much easier )

[ladytophamhatt]

I'd have another one too Foxy.

[Nemoandthefishes]

LTH how old are all your boys again? I know ds4 is same age as chloe.

[PaulaYatesBiggestFan]

we have
child

1 gcses
2 sats
3 sats and 11+
4 just started reception
5 aged 2 (a task in itself)
6 being born

ALL this summer!!!!!!!

help!

[ladytophamhatt]

ds1 is 8, ds2 is 6 and ds3 is 4

[ladytophamhatt]

paula "6 being born"

are you PG?

[cazzybabs]

he he Nemo... I am following this with interest - I want 4,5,6 etc dh wants 2. We have just had number 3....he thinks practially about money (yawn), cars, house size.

Let me know how you persuade your dh please!

[Miaou]

(LTH - did you get my email?? I am trying to return your maternity clothes to you )

Nemo - I opened this thread all excited but I'm not really best placed to advise as I had two, then a big gap, then another two. However I do agree that if you are going to have a fourth, do it soon, so that the littlest one isn't "left out" .

[PaulaYatesBiggestFan]

yes!

[ladytophamhatt]

sorry , that was very direct and blunt!
I saw your name/oldname posted the other day I didn't realise you are who you are until then.

Ae you Pg again??

Ohh you lucky lucky lucky thing is you are

[ladytophamhatt]

OMG, bloody hell...Congratulations!!!

sorry I've missed it until now.

Miaou,, my emil doesn't work anymore. I use my hotamil/msn address instead.

[ladytophamhatt]

Ohhh paula, I am soooo

[pedilia]

You have all made me feel so much better, I have a 7,2,1 year old and am 6 months pregnant with number 4.

We are delighted but other peoples reactions are really starting to p**s me off!

[CarGirl]

All I can add is that 2 years (less 10 days) seems a huge gap after 14 months!!! Just do it. It's easier to find enjoyable family days out etc when they are closer in age. DD1 is outgrowing trips to the park whereas dd4 is just getting full swing into them.

[Nemoandthefishes]

congrates paula

LTH how have you found the 3yr gap from ds3 and ds4?

Hatrick..dont convince me otherwise I will be up the duff..lol

Cazzy thats exactly my problem dh is too practical