Cannot motivate my ds or dp for anything getting frustrated

[zez]

Hi

I am getting quite down with my ds and my dp they seem happy to just sit and watch tv or to sometimes just play on the computer.

I would like us to do more as a family and do things like go to the park, or have a drive out somewhere.

It seems that whenever I mention going somewhere my ds never wants to go, and my dp will make excuses to not go such as its too cold, its too far, or its too expensive.

Today I suggested going to the cinema but my dp will only go to one particular cinema that he prefers and we couldn't make the time of showing that he wanted to go to.

He would not go to any other showing today as he said he wanted to be back for his favourite tv progamms tonight.

Today the pair of them have sat watching tv all day and my dp has not even got out of his pyjamas and its now late afternoon
They are both waiting for primeval to come on.

If there is something that my ds would like to do such as going to the zoo that is one thing my ds does like, my dp runs the idea into the ground has he hates zoos.

Every Sunday I end up going out with my mom and dad and other family as I cannot bear to watch the pair of them sitting and watching the telly all day.

I find my self getting at both of them and my ds is moaning his head off right now that he wants me to go out and get him a Mcdonalds.

I have just come back from taking my sisters dog for a walk as I was feeling so bored.
There was a time that my ds would have loved to have come with me but he never wants to go anymore.

Am I right to feel like this or is it just me.
I feel very dissapointed that we never seem to do much as a family.

Sorry Just needed a moan.

My ds is 7 and my dp is 44

[Maidamess]

You poor thing! Have you tried just marching up , switching off the telly, handing their coats and shoes and saying, Come On, we're off!!

Or if your ds is into primeval, do some research about museums or exhibitions near to you that may tie in with this as he obv. likes it.
At least then you would have some time with ds, if not dp. He might hear what I great time you had and come along next time.

Does your ds ask his dad to do stuff with him, just the two of them?

[cory]

Oh, I feel sorry for you, it really sounds very frustrating. I'm in a position where we can't get out as much as I need due to health issues and I'm climbing up the walls, even though it's nobody's fault.

I would sit them down and tell them that this situation is getting you down. Suggest an arrangement where one day of the week-end, either Saturday or Sunday, is family time, which is earmarked for doing something other than chores.

Suggest that you take it in turns to decide what you're doing (within reason, obviously- ds has to accept that you may not be able to take him to Disneyland every 3 weeks .

When it'd dh's turn, if he wants to watch TV all day, fair enough. If that's how ds wants to spend his day, fair enough. But when it's your turn, they jolly well go with you without moaning.

[zez]

Hi
Maidamess

I don't think that would work switching the telly off it would cause a major row and my ds would scream the place down and act like spoilt brat.
My dp wouldn't help matters as he would also be on the side of my ds.

The only thing my ds and dp do together is play games on the computer, or watch telly.

They do sometimes go to the cinema together on a sunday when they can get themselves moving.
They seem to do more when I am not around.

My ds is now standing next to me moaning for his Mcdonalds again.