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DC2 came without an instruction manual on how to cope with two children - can anyone offer any pointers on how to manage two under two without leaving anyone to cry?

13 replies

MrsFogi · 14/01/2008 22:26

DD2 is three months old yet I still feel as though I'm more clueless than when I had DD1. Can anyone tell me their morning and evening routines so I can work out how everyone else fits it all together. Any other pointers on dealing with two very welcome as well!

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hertsnessex · 14/01/2008 22:28

you will get there, its still early and seems daunting, but you manage. But you do havev to accept that at some point one will cry whilst you are seeing to the other one. Dont feel guilty. i had an 11mth age gap - there was crying - but no one was permanently damaged!

cx

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Spoo · 14/01/2008 22:29

How old is your eldest? I have a 15 month age gap and probably posted something very similar last year. It was incredibly hard for me for the first few months until teh youngest got into more of a routinge. The most difficult time for me was tea time as this clashed with milk time. I had to prepare food with DS2 screaming for milk and then get DS1 to sit down and be fed whilst I was bottle feeding DS2.

I PROMISE IT GETS EASIER!!

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suzi2 · 14/01/2008 22:30

How to manage without crying... erm... never did really lol. All I can say is it gets easier. Mine are now 2.5 and 11 months and it's getting better. Evening, definately get the toddler down first if your baby needs a relaxed environment to sleep.

Our mornings go... feed DD in bed, DS comes through to watch TV. Get them both changed/dressed. Go downstairs, plonk in chairs, feed breakfast. Play. DD then gets a nap in the buggy - push her back and forward at back door while talking to DS inside! DS watches TV while I shower.

TV features a lot.

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Spoo · 14/01/2008 22:31

P.S. MY DSs are very close and play together now leaving my time for mumsnet.

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hana · 14/01/2008 22:32

I found story tapes/cds to be quite helpful during bedtime routines , and still use them now with dd1 and dd2. I could stick one one and get the baby bathed/settled/fed etc and when that was done, go in and read a proper story

nothing wrong with one crying while you sort the other out!

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suzi2 · 14/01/2008 22:33

oh yes, dinner time. I recommend a sling for the baby as they're often grizzly and it allows you to cook (but be careful!). I do recall sitting on the floor, feeding DD to calm her (her crying set DS off and vice versa) and telling DS to bring mummy the cereal and a bowl and that was his dinner! Do what gets you through the day.

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Spoo · 14/01/2008 22:34

Suzie - just made me think. If you struggle to get downstairs in the mornings. Get everything sorted upstairs - we have a basket with nighttime stuff to bring down - e.g. nappies, washing and clean socks. Sit on the stairs with both on your lap. Get to the bottom deposit kids - run back up for the basket. You are now downstairs.

Keep a changing box downstairs with nappies and other stuff in - so you don't need to go upstairs for anything during the day - apart from sleeps. Saves a lot of mispent energy

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Spoo · 14/01/2008 22:36

Tele did feature a lot in morning routines. DS1 drinking his milk in bed watching telling - whilst carrying out first feed of the day. DS1 watching tele whilst DS2 in cot - whilst I have shower. Dress me and kids - tidy upstairs - then downstairs as described.

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Spoo · 14/01/2008 22:47

Evening routine. Get baby washed and dressed and in baby bouncer. Cart baby round with you whilst doing bedtime routine with toddler. Put toddler in bed. Feed Baby. Go and reput toddler in bed. Go re-settle baby .... continue until baby,toddler or you asleep.

Note: this bedtime routine can be noisy - do it often enough and they should quieten down.

Note: keep toddler in a cot for as long as possible, you do not want visits whilst feeding.

Will stop posting now but recommend you read three shoes no socks and a hairbrush - a very direct read about having your second baby.

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suzi2 · 14/01/2008 22:50

Better than keeping your toddler in a cot is putting them in a big bed and putting a stairgate on their door. That way they can get up and entertain themself with toys but can't get to you lol.

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MrsFogi · 14/01/2008 23:14

Mn to the rescue - thanks for the replies so far. I'm looking forward to it getting easier! Dd1 is nearly 2.

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coby · 14/01/2008 23:33

Oh yes, it does get easier. Definitely.

I would give advice on how I coped but I'm not sure what I did - it was all a blur. I wish I could remember.... DC3 on the way.

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BITCAT · 14/01/2008 23:58

It is hard i had 15mths between ds2 and dd1, and i already had another child so at 1 point i had 3 under 5. You will adjust your routine slightly to compensate and you will just cope. I used to get up before children get myself dressed, maybe have drink and piece of toast if time for it, feed children when up clean them up and dress them, take my eldest to nursery go home or shopping if needed, run round quickly tidy whilst they napping have a play with them go pick my son up from nursery. Get home prepare tea, children watch bit of telly, read a book jigsaws. Tea time, bath wind down time put to bed and sit down for a while, maybe do some washing putting away etc.... Does get easier as they get older as older children can bath themselves, keep them selves amused and help out with a few chores.

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