Ds1 (aged 7) came shopping with me and dp to choose teddy for his baby brother due next month. He had already looked in catalouge and chosen mamas & papas monkey.
Got to shop and ds finds monkey, well actually he finds two. One for the baby and the other he keeps talking to and snuggling. He asked (begged) if he could have it and that he loved it sooo much. After a chat with him he did reluctantly put it back and buried it under all the other soft toys so no one else could have him.
He paid for his little brothers monkey (not with his money obviously) and we left the shop. Ds was desperately trying to hold back tear and a few leaked out. We had a cuddle and a chat. He said he wanted to match his baby brother with this and that the monkeys could play together. This is the first and only time he has ever behaved like this over something. He has also been exceptionally wonderful about the new baby and enthusiastic about choosing bedding etc for him. Dp was not impressed at all and felt that the baby should only have the monkey. After abit of time out thinking i spoke to dp who went back to the shop with ds and got ds the monkey he had buried.
I said to ds that this was in a way a present from the baby and the monkey the baby has is a present from ds1. Had a long chat with him and explained that the baby will be getting lots of new things, just like he did as a baby. That is because it is the babys acutal birth day. Ds seems to understand.
He is now asleep with his new monkey and I heard him playing with his new monkey and special teddy. He sounded ever so sweet and I think i did th right thing. I have never known ds be so upset over something, he was really trying to hold back the tears.
Was difficult to know how to handle it and i probably did the wrong thing, but did what i thought was best at the time.
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Parenting
So I have probably made a rod for my own back but i just couldnt help myself.
MamaMaiasaura · 04/11/2007 21:45
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