3.5yo's been asked by friend's nanny to go to friend's house for lunch after nursery - I'm not invited! Would you be ok with this?

[franch]

Just a bit unsure as this is unknown territory. DD1 has been to friends' houses without me before, but it's always been to houses we've visited together first. She's been at nursery with this girl for a year; they live nearby; I've met the mum, chatted once or twice and she seems really nice; don't know the nanny, but she seems fine. Nanny has said she'll take DD1 back to the house with her straight after nursery, then I can come to pick her up. TBH I'd prefer to go with her the first time but I'm sure it'll be fine ... If I did decide I was uncomfortable with it I'm not sure what I'd say.

Not sure what I'm worried about really but I think I always imagined DD1 would go and play at the homes of people I knew, especially at this young age - is that unrealistic?

[PregnantGrrrl]

Is it the mother or the nanny who'll be there? If you don't know the nanny well, and you've not been to the house, it's understandable to feel unsure.

[Pruners]

Message withdrawn

[franch]

Just the nanny ... She does seem very nice but no, I don't know her well - never said more than hello to each other before.

DD1's nursery teacher's a friend of mine and has good instincts so I could ask her what she thinks - she will know the nanny - but my first preference would be to go with her the first time really.

Not sure how I would phrase this tho and I have already told DD1 about the lunch date as I originally imagined I would be accompanying her!

[PregnantGrrrl]

personally, i'd make sure i had her tel number before hand, and if you're picking her up, not worry too much.

[franch]

Sorry that was a reply to pregnantgrrrl

Pruners I have met the mum and have had a couple of chats with her - good vibe and would be less concerned if it was her.

Yes I suppose I could find a reason for meeting them at the nursery and us all walking back to friend's house together so that I can at least go in with her briefly before leaving her ...

[franch]

Pregnant: yes we all have each other's numbers. I suppose this is just the start of a lifetime of similar dilemmas ...

[Smithagain]

"I hope you don't mind, but I'm not 100% sure how DD1 will feel going to an unfamiliar house. Would it be OK if I just walk along with you and settle her in before I leave her?"

Would something like that work?

[franch]

Yep, I expect that would be fine Smith