I have a 5 week old ds who I obviously love so dearly.
I'm just fining it all very difficult, had lots of problems bfing, which I am still persisting with combined with bottle feeding ebm and formula (though I'm starting to think it's quite selfish of me as he seems more satisfied after a bottle and maybe I'm doing it for myself more than for him)
The birth was straightforward, felt physically recovered in about 3 weeks which I'm very grateful for.
At the beginning when dp was on pat leave we were going to a bf clinic, since it's been just us to we've been for 1 30 min walk and back to the bf clinic once. I feel too anxious to go to mum and baby groups, or out into town, out to the shops in case he has a big meltdown and I don't know what to do. I would assume the crying is due to hunger but I'm very awkwardly feeding using nipple shields and every feed starts with a battle of me trying to move his hands out of the way and him crying more/getting agitated, the feed lasts at least an hour with lots of crying, me in pain and squeezing each boob as it makes it feel less bad somehow, and ends with more crying like he isn't satisfied. I'm anxious to have visitors as I have to leave them an hour while we feed in the bedroom.
We bottle feed at night and I feel like I reLy on my dp too much as most times I can't even put ds down to sleep for longer than an hour which means he wakes up crying, waking up dp.
Not sure why I'm writing but this is all a lot harder than I had anticipated- we spend pretty much all day everyday in the bedroom and I feel like at this stage we should be able to leave the house.
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Not sure I'm cut out for this
20 replies
Cinnamon84 · 21/09/2016 10:37
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