Am I taking this too personally?

(12 Posts)
Luna2016 Thu 21-Jul-16 17:37:00

I just felt really frustrated at this woman today. I was in like buying shopping with my 2 LO (DS 2years DD 6 months), DS was shooting "dada" and I said "daddy's at home". This older woman was speaking to her husband I presume, about how "people like that is what's wrong with society, sitting around our money paying for there kids". If I didn't have my kids with me I would have probably have her a piece of my mind.

You see my husband has epilepsy and had a fit a couple of weeks previously and fell and broke his ankle , and didn't want to drag him around here there and everywhere on crutches.

We both work but from home. He edits photos for a local photography company and I do wedding planning.

I'm so bloody annoyed. I think what's annoying me more is she had said it in from of my kids I know they probably won't remember but its still got to me.

callherwillow Thu 21-Jul-16 17:38:36

Why didn't you say anything? I'm not one for massive confrontations but I would.

Gardencentregroupie Thu 21-Jul-16 17:39:55

She's a silly narrow minded arse. Try not to let it bother you. Imagine being her and living in such an unpleasant world of assumptions. FWIW she'd probably have a field day with DH and I, we're often both around in the day, she wouldn't know we both work shifts. flowers for your poor DH.

SpinnakerInTheEther Thu 21-Jul-16 17:43:05

Just sounds like a horribly judgmental woman. I think it would probably take more than a single confrontation in a supermarket to put her right. With people like this, once you spelt out your circumstances, you would be most likely be regarded as 'the exception' rather than 'the rule'.

Luna2016 Thu 21-Jul-16 18:25:39

The reason I didn't say anything was because my LO were in the trolls seat and didn't want to be confronting by someone over/through my children and didn't want them to get upset.

SpinnakerInTheEther Thu 21-Jul-16 18:29:22

I would have ignored like you did, OP. You are right to avoid unpleasantness in front of your children, who would be unlikely to understand what she was going on about even if they had heard it.

LoreleiGilmoreIsMyBFF Thu 21-Jul-16 18:30:31

I honestly don't think it would have changed anything. In fact, if she's that obnoxious, she probably would have got a kick out of the confrontation. You should be proud of yourself for maintaining your cool in front of your children!

LPickers Fri 22-Jul-16 12:32:11

When similar has happened to me, I can never think of what to say at the time and then go home feeling weak or down about it, wishing I'd said something. If people are never contradicted, then they will go through life thinking its OK to carrying on making these remarks in public, and will make lots of other people upset too. The response could be calmly and politely given.

"Excuse me, I heard what you said, and actually my husband has a job and works from home". Say it confidently with a smile then walk off!

At the time it's hard to think of these things, I know.

splendide Fri 22-Jul-16 14:37:22

That's so bizarre - why on earth would she assume he was unemployed just because he happened to be at home on a random Thursday.

Mamaofthree86 Fri 22-Jul-16 15:21:41

I'm new to this so sorry if I'm posting in the wrong 'section'!
We're thinking about trying for another baby. We have three dc's;
Ds1 - 8
Ds2-6
Dd1- 3
Friends/family we have spoke to about expanding our family can't understand at all why we would want another child, all saying things along the line of 'isn't 3 enough?' Etc etc..
Now I know I shouldn't care BUT as I am the only one in my circle of friends 'crazy' enough to want more than 3 (their words not mine), I'd like to speak to anyone that does have four or more children, if you have negative reactions and how you react to them. Also interested in age gaps! What age gaps do your children have and is it a big jump going from 3 to 4?
Thanks so much in advance for any replies smile

Mamaofthree86 Fri 22-Jul-16 15:22:43

As you can see I've posted in the wrong place! Bare with me!

2015mom Fri 22-Jul-16 18:25:46

You should have said something to her, I know you did not want a confrontation with your kids but you could have said it calmly so maybe your kids would have just thought it was a conversation.... People like that lady need to be put in their place! U both work and ur partner is not well!
She would have thought twice about making comments like that the silly cow

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