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Parenting

child deciding what to wear

25 replies

itslookingbright · 27/05/2016 16:00

At what age did you let your child to have a say in what to wear and what clothes to buy and at what age would/did you let your child to decide on their own what kind of clothes to buy and wear? Just curious!

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hownottofuckup · 27/05/2016 16:02

Once they started expressing a preference, probably about 2.5ish.

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Twistedheartache · 27/05/2016 16:06

I can't really remember but probably around 3, with the proviso that it needs to be reasonably weather appropriate.
Madam had such strong opinions from v early on that it became easier to buy what she liked than waste money on stuff she refused to wear.
I love her starting school & school uniform - far easier of a morning

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lisaneedsarest · 27/05/2016 16:08

It depends on the child I guess but pretty much as soon as they decide they want to have a say - my two ds's have never really been bothered so I generally buy there clothes without them there although they are now starting to show a preference. They pretty much always choose from their wardrobe what they are wearing that day though.
My dd was completely different and from about 2 had strong views on what she wears, I'd usually take her shopping with me as otherwise she wouldn't wear half the stuff I bought! She is often in very weird and wonderful creations!
I have always been happy to let them choose what they wear even if it looks crazy, the only time I intervene is if it is impractical!

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squizita · 27/05/2016 16:09

Already (to a very small degree) and mine is 20 months. It's a useful skill. We look at the weather and decide (NB goadys and judgeys I decide but chat with her) is it coat or cardie weather? And then does she want spotty coat or flowery coat? I don't care if it matches, gets her out with no fuss and warm.

She doesn't have total free reign obviously, it's very controlled. I'l' hold up (for example) a Minnie t-shirt and a Frozen T-shirt in Tesco sale and say "which is your favourite?" and get that one, or lay out jeans, socks, undervest but let her choose which colour sweater to help her say the words.

"Beppa Big Dess" is currently the favourite when we "Go Nanmas" ... she toddles off to find it. No idea why.
Unfortunately she also asks to wear "cock shoes" (Crocks) whenever we are somewhere you can hear a pin drop e.g. Church, library and sings "cock cock cock shoes" in glee... Grin

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OrionsAccessory · 27/05/2016 16:14

Around 2ish for dd1. Dd2 loved the colour green from very early on so was choosing all green clothes by 18months. We usually get loads of hand me downs from cousins so the shopping thing isn't that much of an issue. I know kind of stuff they like and find comfortable so I'll choose them clothes based on that rather than what I like when I am buying them clothes.

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GreenTomatoJam · 27/05/2016 16:15

DS1 - he'll occasionally refuse to wear something I've bought him, but generally doesn't care at all.

DS2 (2.5) - much stronger opinions, often wanders off to his wardrobe in the morning and comes out with an outfit. If the outfit isn't totally unsuitable, he wears it.

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Thebookswereherfriends · 27/05/2016 16:47

Just starting now at 3.5yrs with DD. Ever since starting preschool her clothes need to be 'pretty'. Trousers will only be worn if very comfy and can be worn with a 'pretty top'. I have very little interest in clothes and am finding it all rather wearing. Saying that I am allowing her preferences and have been and bought flowery and pink shoes even though they are not very practical, as she also enjoys jumping in puddles! I'm hoping if I don't fight it it then as she gets older practicality will become more of a component of the decisions!

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BertrandRussell · 27/05/2016 16:52

As soon as they could express a preference. I treated them like dolls til then- it was wonderful!

Dd had such ghastly taste thought, that I gave her free rein in charity shops on condition that I had a say with more expensive things.

Mind you, her first sentence was "I not wear that"

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Lucked · 27/05/2016 16:54

I have a 4 year old and a 2 year old and I don't consult them on what I buy. I don't take them clothes shopping so they aren't really aware of it.

My ds is not keen on shorts or t-shirts so I am mindful of this when buying his summer wardrobe.

Day to day I also tend to choose but if they have a preference that isn't silly that is fine. I dress them appropriate for the day be it park, church, party or home not just appropriate for the weather.

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YerAWizardHarry · 27/05/2016 16:55

DS is 3.4 and generally couldn't care less! Sometimes has a. Opinion on what jacket to wear but other than that he lets me have free reign

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FaithAscending · 27/05/2016 16:59

DD has been choosing since she was about 18 months! She would squirm and wriggle if she didn't like my choice! So I started giving her a limited choice (This or that). Now at 3 she pretty much choses the whole outfit from her chest of drawers. She often asks me if it 'matches' so that she's co-ordinated. She is a very strong-willed child and I prefer to support her to make her own choices than fight over it. Pick your battles!

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GraciesMansion · 27/05/2016 17:02

Ds is 12 and will quite happily wear anything I suggest still. He was probably at school before I stopped giving him clothes to put on in the morning.

Dd was 2 when she started refusing to wear what I gave her and saying, "I not wear that." I decided there were bigger and better battles to be had and just let her choose. However, just as she will protest at wearing something, I reserve the right to not buy something.

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Haudyerwheesht · 27/05/2016 17:04

Ds doesn't care so long as it's comfy. He's 9.

Dd has decided herself since below 2 because she has very strong opinions about it and I have bigger battles to fight

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HappyNevertheless · 27/05/2016 17:07

I let them chose what to wear from their cupboard from about 2.5yo. As soon as they were able to get dressed in their own.

Buying their clothes? I haven't given them any day in it until they were nearly teenagers. they also have no interest in Clothes at all so the battle us now to teach them how to shop

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BackforGood · 27/05/2016 17:12

Depends on where we were going / what we were doing. They've been able to express a choice in what they wear from as soon as they were able (2ish??). Although that would be a choice from what was in their wardrobe, obviously, not perusing the internet for purchase Wink

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SerenityReynolds · 27/05/2016 17:13

DD1 (3.5) was about 2.5 when she started refusing to wear certain things. I tend to let her choose, as long as the outfit she ends up with is practical for the weather/days activities. When shopping, I'll show her a few pre selected by meoptions and she gets the final decision, though now I do have a fairly good sense of what she likes.

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RiverTam · 27/05/2016 17:13

Probably about 3ish? And although I don't take DD (now 6) shopping with me I am very aware of what she will and won't wear.

She's in a non-uniform school and although I select her clothes with her the night before she leant by about halfway through reception year about choosing clothes according to the weather and the day's activities (eg nest not to wear tights if she's got swimming after school).

It's a good skill to have. Other than being practical I don't really care if it 'goes' or not. - if you can't wear bonkers combinations where you're little when can you?!

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dollylucy · 27/05/2016 17:15

Ds is 8, he's only just started commenting.
And that's only cos he wants to wear comfiest trousers/shorts

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EquinoxBloom · 27/05/2016 17:21

DD is 3 and in the last few months has started refusing to wear certain things. I now have to take her taste into account when I shop.

She can be persuaded into most things, but I try to take her wishes into account whilst also making her see that a princess dress isn't suitable for nursery, or sandals aren't right if it's raining.

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Chrisinthemorning · 27/05/2016 17:23

DS is nearly 4 and now has opinions. He likes trackiebottoms more than jeans, bright blue over dark blue and likes astronaut, car, plane etc patterns and characters like toy story and Star Wars.
I tend to give him a choice of 2 t shirts that fit and look ok with the chosen trousers. I give in to trackie bottoms unless I really want him to look smart.
Poor child has a horrible school uniform - adorable but not comfortable or practical really.

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MrsJoeyMaynard · 27/05/2016 17:25

They've had a choice in what they want to wear since they were old enough to express a preference. As long as it's suitable for the day's weather / activities, they can wear it.

They have much less choice in what is bought, although if they're with me when I'm buying clothes, they'll generally be offered a small choice of, say, pre-selected top A or pre-selected top B.

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kiki22 · 27/05/2016 17:27

2.5 to choose however I usually give a selection of what he can wear to choose from so he is dressed for the weather and where we are going, I buy his clothes so I choose what I buy but I do try to buy things I know he will like I wouldn't force him into something he hated.

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BertieBotts · 27/05/2016 17:38

I bought all of DS's clothes without consulting him until he became fussy about materials and needed to try things on. About four? Taking him around shops was mostly a pain up until that point or I would have included him. I don't see why you wouldn't TBH.

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BertieBotts · 27/05/2016 17:39

And yes always let him choose his own clothes from drawers as soon as he could. And when he was a baby it was mostly picking whatever was clean.

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reallywittyname · 27/05/2016 22:42

Since she learnt to dress herself at about 2.5, we can hear her clattering through her drawers every morning. She likes ALL her clothes to match from the skin out and won't wear anything if it hasn't got that day's colour on it. She will come in to my room in head to toe green and announce "it's a green day today mummy!". She would also change her outfit six times a day if I let her.

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