seperation anxiety

(11 Posts)
howiloveanicecupoftea Sun 10-Apr-16 16:26:16

At what age does this stop? DS still cries when I leave the room/PPP to the loo etc but I don't know if this is still separation anxiety or just a tantrum?

howiloveanicecupoftea Sun 10-Apr-16 16:26:33

Sorry should say he's 22 months

starpatch Sun 10-Apr-16 20:39:36

Sorry separation anxiety goes up to 5 years and beyond!

caley26 Thu 14-Apr-16 13:13:35

i had this with my first child and it was abit of a slow process.its all a matter of telling them your just going to get a drink,"can you keep building this tower for me",go and get a drink,keep talking to them saying your so good letting mummy get a drink,etc,then go back to them,praise them,,,then do it again a while later but stand in the kitchen for a moment longer,then go back,but talking to them is key at this stage so they know you haven't fell off the face of the earth,,keep doing this,longer each time,praising them each time,before you know it your managing to go to the loo in peace and he wont even notice,keep perceiving..you may need to return them to the place you want them to play and there will be grumbles but it will work,good luck..smile

howiloveanicecupoftea Sat 16-Apr-16 12:40:58

He had go loads better after the typical period of baby separation anxiety and would play independently for a good long while. Now though when I say I'm just going to have a shower/ go to the toilet etc he has a meltdown!

kiki22 Mon 18-Apr-16 10:26:13

My son went through lots of periods of separation anxiety first when he was about 11 months then around 2 then just after 3 when he started nursery then just the around the last few months just before his 4th birthday. So looks like its been an annual thing for us, I think this recent one was due to 2 weeks together at Xmas then going back to nursery plus I'm pregnant so hes adjusting to the idea of sharing me.

Ive always just tried to carry on as normal until he comes out the other end of it he always has so far, Thursday last week he just stopped and has been all about daddy simce 😊

clarella Mon 18-Apr-16 10:29:22

I just (finally) got the book 'raising boys' and there was a piece in it about boys tending to have more separation anxiety than girls. Obv there's variations and every child is different. I've only recently been able to leave the room consistently without upset and ds is 3.4.

clarella Mon 18-Apr-16 10:30:52

And interestingly there's a big switch over to daddy at age 6! Between 3-6 it starts to develop, mainly all about mummy till 3. (But there's always exceptions).

howiloveanicecupoftea Mon 18-Apr-16 10:44:10

What's the book you mention clarella? Is it known to be good?

clarella Mon 18-Apr-16 11:04:35

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Raising-Boys-Different-Become-Well-Balanced/dp/0008128030

Yes it is well known.

The other one that is good for stuff like this is "what every parent needs to know" by margot Sunderland.

Toddlercalm is good too and Janet Lansbury often has good ways to deal with things (just google her online).

But in reality, no one has written a book about your child, only you can do that smile meet their needs as they arise.

clarella Mon 18-Apr-16 11:09:27

I've only just got the boys book, and I think there's a few bits in it that aren't quite right - but we must always read these books remembering our children are individuals.

I found his observations of some typical behaviour helpful, as I've found in the other books. (Or more reassuring my husband to be honest)

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