Sorry, this is long.
DS2 is 3.5. Happily settled at pre-school and is going to Reception in September (all being well). Pre-school have flagged up a couple of issues with him:
- he only responds in 2/3 word sentences
- sometimes he answers questions with nonsense answers, i.e. 'what do you want to do, DS2?' Answer: "Daddy's gone to work!'
- he doesn't settle for story time but wanders around and does his own thing
After discussion with the preschool, I took him to the health visitor. She quizzed me pretty thoroughly about his behaviour and her conclusion was that he's probably just shy, he's probably quite bright and it's more of a personality issue than anything else. She asked me to check back in a couple of months and the preschool were happy that I do that too.
I wonder though. He is quite an odd child. It's quite hard to express just how he's odd, but he is. Gorgeous and affectionate though. Sometimes when he gets upset, it's almost as if he's acting it - as if he's pretending to be upset and then he makes himself upset. He's terrified (to the point of screaming) of dogs, for no reason. He shouts 'TRACCCTORRR! (at ear-bleeding levels) at passing tractors (we live in a rural part of the country). DH said the other day that he wondered whether DS2 was quite 'right' without exactly being able to put his finger on what was different about him. His language is not amazing for his age. Again, the health visitor didn't think it was a problem. He definitely speaks in long sentences and is a LOT more outgoing and extrovert with people he knows.
He used to have ferocious tantrums when he was about 18 months to, well, about a few months ago. So bad that people used to have to come to my aid. There have been a few moments when I've thought to myself "I can't cope with you." I have done, obviously, and those days now are few and far between. He used to be incredibly violent towards me, so much so that I found myself flinching whenever I picked him up. Even now, he's much better, but occasionally he'll hit or hurt some other child and come and tell me with a grin on his face. Of course, he gets told off and he does say sorry but it's not very pleasant.
On the other hand, preschool have absolutely no behavioural issues with him, he has a strong and loving relationship with his older brother and in some areas, he seems quite scarily bright. I bought him a wall frieze of numbers because he was starting to read the bus numbers. Within a day of it being on his wall, he was able to read all the numbers.
What do you wise vipers think? I don't know whether to seek a little bit more professional help or to accept that he's just very individual and see how we go.